Clappy Posted December 6, 2010 Share Posted December 6, 2010 Episode 7: Seane being grounded for stealing meat she deserved it I tried to resist saying it but.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CartoonCF Posted December 6, 2010 Share Posted December 6, 2010 Bikini Bottom High: A+ Great start! Hope it gets even better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wumbo Posted December 6, 2010 Share Posted December 6, 2010 Episode Grades: 1= D 2= D- 3= D- 4= D 5= F 6= C(Cuz' it's funny to me) 7= F 8= F 9= C- 10= D- 11= F 12= F 13= D 14= D Which leads to an F.I fail to see your logic here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Metal Snake Posted December 7, 2010 Share Posted December 7, 2010 I liked your criticism, I just felt like I should defend my show a bit. SpongeBoy! Get a Clue!: D+ Look teenj, we know you're trying, but I do think your show needs a bit of criticism. This show is supposed to be a show about mysteries. I love mystery, I grew up with books about mystery when I was a little kid. But I don't think this spin-off fits the definition of a mystery. First of all, these episodes are too short. Your first episode *SPOILER* was about Sandy losing her tail, and they call the security snails, and find it in Jimmy's backpack?! Jimmy was only in the episode for a few seconds. He had no personality at all, so it wasn't in the least surprising. Also, it's not a "mystery" if it only takes our protagonists a few seconds to solve the crime. These plots need to be more suspenseful. Secondly, the villains in this show are extremely uninteresting. These villains do bad things to heroes for the stupidest reasons. Stealing bikes because your daughter ruined your flowers, trying to kill someone for teaching your class, poisoning food because the kids were being mean?! It would be so much more intriguing if the villains actually had character, and something to actually drive them to do those things. Right now, these villains are just plot devices. Also, you claim this is supposed to be a lighthearted spin-off, meaning it's supposed to appeal to a younger audience. On the contrary, this show contains blood, gore, and dark moments. I know it doesn't contain any bad language, but it involves scenes of violence and murder. If you think animals getting gutted and a man being murdered by an elderly woman is kid-friendly, you need to lay off the schnapps. I know I said this show was okay at first, but after reading some more episodes, I'm starting to reconsider. Teenj, I'm sorry, I know you're trying to do a good job, but you have to consider what your viewers want to read too when your writing this show. Please try to make this show better. Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wumbo Posted December 7, 2010 Share Posted December 7, 2010 If you think animals getting gutted and a man being murdered by an elderly woman is kid-friendly, you need to lay off the schnapps.Lol'd. Anyway, A- for Clappy's spin-off. Good start. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJ Posted December 7, 2010 Share Posted December 7, 2010 SpongeBoy! Get a Clue!: D+ Look teenj, we know you're trying, but I do think your show needs a bit of criticism. This show is supposed to be a show about mysteries. I love mystery, I grew up with books about mystery when I was a little kid. But I don't think this spin-off fits the definition of a mystery. First of all, these episodes are too short. Your first episode *SPOILER* was about Sandy losing her tail, and they call the security snails, and find it in Jimmy's backpack?! Jimmy was only in the episode for a few seconds. He had no personality at all, so it wasn't in the least surprising. Also, it's not a "mystery" if it only takes our protagonists a few seconds to solve the crime. These plots need to be more suspenseful. Secondly, the villains in this show are extremely uninteresting. These villains do bad things to heroes for the stupidest reasons. Stealing bikes because your daughter ruined your flowers, trying to kill someone for teaching your class, poisoning food because the kids were being mean?! It would be so much more intriguing if the villains actually had character, and something to actually drive them to do those things. Right now, these villains are just plot devices. Also, you claim this is supposed to be a lighthearted spin-off, meaning it's supposed to appeal to a younger audience. On the contrary, this show contains blood, gore, and dark moments. I know it doesn't contain any bad language, but it involves scenes of violence and murder. If you think animals getting gutted and a man being murdered by an elderly woman is kid-friendly, you need to lay off the schnapps. I know I said this show was okay at first, but after reading some more episodes, I'm starting to reconsider. Teenj, I'm sorry, I know you're trying to do a good job, but you have to consider what your viewers want to read too when your writing this show. Please try to make this show better. Thank you. Too short? I don't get it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wumbo Posted December 7, 2010 Share Posted December 7, 2010 Too short? I don't get it.They... should be longer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Car Posted December 8, 2010 Share Posted December 8, 2010 Too short? I don't get it. He obviously meant that the episodes are too short, and that the mysteries are too rushed to be "mysterious." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Metal Snake Posted December 8, 2010 Share Posted December 8, 2010 He obviously meant that the episodes are too short, and that the mysteries are too rushed to be "mysterious." Right on the nail. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJ Posted December 8, 2010 Share Posted December 8, 2010 Right on the nail. Your ragging on me about my spin-off being short, when other spinoffs are around the same legnth.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Metal Snake Posted December 8, 2010 Share Posted December 8, 2010 Your ragging on me about my spin-off being short, when other spinoffs are around the same legnth.. Perhaps you didn't hear me the first time. It's a mystery. It's not supposed to be short. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Car Posted December 8, 2010 Share Posted December 8, 2010 Perhaps you didn't hear me the first time. It's a mystery. It's not supposed to be short. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ron Posted December 9, 2010 Share Posted December 9, 2010 Spongebob: Diaries of a Serial Killer B- It was a pretty good start. But I felt it was extremely rushed and I hope you can detail it more in the future. In other spin offs, including yours, I could really picture what was happening, as if I was actually there. But I didn't get this vibe here. I hope other episodes are longer and don't bare the title "I rushed!" But I really enjoyed the creepiness and the mysteriousness of the show. But I wish you would've focused more on the plane crash, as if there was no plane crash, there would be no spin off. It's what the show is based on. I hope to read more good episodes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJ Posted December 10, 2010 Share Posted December 10, 2010 Spongebob: Diaries Of A Serial Killer - B+ I like the show. The killings do catch my attention. I just wish it was a bit longer. Overall, I'm glad to hear you've planned out the rest of the season and I can't wait to see where it goes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Car Posted December 10, 2010 Share Posted December 10, 2010 Team Spongebob "The Blood of Triton"- C- This episode was ok, although there were some huge flaws. First of all, the orgainization is quite sloppy, not just this episode but the series as a whole, and it can be hard to read at parts. Secondly, the episode is so short and is undetailed. I'm not going to harp on you for this, as I have trouble with both of these as a writer too, but I think you should increase the length, and amount of detail the episodes have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJ Posted December 10, 2010 Share Posted December 10, 2010 Team Spongebob "The Blood of Triton"- C- This episode was ok, although there were some huge flaws. First of all, the orgainization is quite sloppy, not just this episode but the series as a whole, and it can be hard to read at parts. Secondly, the episode is so short and is undetailed. I'm not going to harp on you for this, as I have trouble with both of these as a writer too, but I think you should increase the length, and amount of detail the episodes have. It's takes really long to make an episode, because I have to use an on screen keyboard. That's the problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Car Posted December 10, 2010 Share Posted December 10, 2010 It's takes really long to make an episode, because I have to use an on screen keyboard. That's the problem. I understand it's tough, but if you really take your time to make a decently lengthed and detailed episode, then this series could really take off as a legend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJ Posted December 10, 2010 Share Posted December 10, 2010 SBlover95 said: I understand it's tough, but if you really take your time to make a decently lengthed and detailed episode, then this series could really take off as a legend. I intend it to. Thanks. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
70s Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 It's takes really long to make an episode, because I have to use an on screen keyboard. That's the problem.Keyboards are pretty reasonably priced. Why not get one? =/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TJ Posted December 11, 2010 Share Posted December 11, 2010 Keyboards are pretty reasonably priced. Why not get one? =/ We tried to, but the keyboard we brought didn't work. My mom says she gotta buy an hp keyboard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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