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Raspberry

What in Neptune's name is that unholy abomination!?

Last time, I talked about a Nicktoon based off an IP I knew nothing about. It looks like we’re getting the same deal here too! Yay. #34. “The Lilo” – Winx Club [August 26, 2012] Okay, first of all, god damn, I did not expect this entire franchise to date back to 2004. Before doing this list, I assumed it was some new concept or something. So looks like I’ll be starting off with Season 5, the beginning of the Nick seasons. My summary here’s gonna be pretty condensed though. Anyway, the episode starts off with foreshadowing of the villains who want to defeat the Winx. It then cuts to Flora doing a practice test by gliding on water. Professor Palladium tells her to be more confident but Flora doesn’t have it in her to do that. Ms. Vergonda (god I hope I’m spelling these names right) tells the Winx that there’s trouble in the kingdom involving a magical plant called the Lilo. The Winx must find the Lilo and then plant it before sunset so the flower doesn’t lose its power (hey that rhymed). The rival group watch her explain the plant through a bubble and they plan to find the Lilo before they do. The Winx land in Gardenia where the Lilo is in the presence of these two girls heading to a flower garden. They head over to a flower shop Bloom’s mother works at. With the help of Flora using her mind powers, she figures out the Lilo used to be there and tries to track it down following the two girls (one of them making random stops at places). They end up at a mall and walking up to the music store, they meet the two girls and the Lilo. Unfortunately, the Trix (that’s the name of the villains btw) arrive too and demand the little girl give them the Lilo. Of course, the girl holding the plant rejects them and then runs away, and the Trix chase after her. Not wanting the Trix to get the plant, the Winx transform into Magic Winx mode. Cue transformation sequence where the characters give their names and their titles. The Trix try to find the girl and they find her hiding in a bush, with the pedal sticking out of it. They try to steal the Lilo but Missy (the name of the older sister btw) stops by to take her little sister back. After one of the Trix suffers a kick to the crotch, all of the Winx members use their powers to fight them off. The rest of the Trix use their powers to distract them all while their leader reaches the Lilo. Aisha and Stella use their powers to fight off the clones one of them set up. However, one of the Trix summons a dark cloud, damaging some of the Winx. The Trix take chase after Missy and her sister as they go towards the community garden the little one wanted to go to. Leader Icy is then stopped by Flora and they fight each other. All members of the Trix grab the girl and the Lilo but the girl throws off the plant. Flora saves Macy (the name of the girl) from falling as the others try to save the Lilo. The plant ends up dropping on the ground and it starts blooming and the Trix try to use it to become more powerful. But with the help of everyone’s belief in them, the Winx defeat them all and save the day. So that was Winx Club! At least the start of its first Nick season. This one was rather okay, though typically these kinds of shows don’t really interest me that much. I’d call it a gender norms thing but there’s one or two Nicktoons coming up on here that’ll disprove that theory. Humor isn’t really strong either but I did laugh when Macy kicked one of the Trix. Other than that, nothing much for me I want to seek here. VERDICT: 5.5/10 (There’s an audience out there for these shows but honestly, there’s other shows I’d rather watch.) RANKINGS: Also before I reveal the start of the next show, I have an announcement. After thinking it over, I've decided to add a new Nicktoon to my wheel. What could it be? ......Action League Now is going to be added! Although it didn't show up on the article I was initially looking at, I did look at the Wikipedia article for Nicktoons and found it on there. So welcome to the party, Action League! Okay, I've stalled enough. What's my next show gonna be?

Raspberries! They're annoying in the sense that they go off in a hurry but damn if they aren't delicious. There's also pineapples, satsumas and galia melons.

Discuss my cousin.

30. What If...Nickelodeon Owned the SBC Spin-Offs? One year...nobody knows what year it was exactly, but it marked a point in history in which Viacom decided that if they were going to keep Nickelodeon afloat, they were going to have to act fast. Well, except for the whole part of this company being called Viacom, because as of this writing, they are now referred to as ViacomCBS...oh wait, that still isn’t right? For fuck’s sake. Anyways, Paramount... – actually, you know what? This is a hypothetical story anyways, and we don’t want to get sued, so let’s make some last minute changes. ViacomountCBSSkydanceKonamiSiliconValleyIKEA, shortened to Viacomount to make it sound less annoying (or shortened to just Viacom because that’s what we all still call them), saw dwindling viewership for Nickelodeon. They have been so busy building up their own personal Marvel universe with their most successful IP, SpongeBob SquarePants, while throwing everything else to the wolves, and yet their network wasn’t doing so hot. Even after the Nicktoons channel rebranded to NickSpongeBob, it wasn’t good enough. A lot of people say it’s due to the oversatuation of their IP, while others theorized that the Quiet on Set documentary was somehow still powerful enough to get them cooked. Whatever the means, they were growing desperate to find ways to create new content. That was when they discovered the SpongeBob Community and its spin-off library, and just like that, everything about to change… SBCers were alarmed by the news that the people down at Viacomount had purchased the rights to their spin-off library without any notice. To make matters worse, the members were forced to erase their stories so as to not leave evidence that these new spin-off ideas were being taken directly from a certain fan site. As a compromise, Viacomount promised to give the creators of the shows that they greenlit some creative control. These were the end results… One-Time SpongeBob Characters: Where Are They Now? In the current climate of the main series bringing just about every one-time character back as nostalgia pandering to the growing annoyance of its viewers, there were mostly high hopes for this upcoming spin-off. Wumbo, the creator, wanted the first season to focus mainly on the residents of Squidville – the clarinet trio, the Squids playing croquet, the turkey sandwich that someone heard better comebacks from, the canned bread, and of course the fire hydrant that Patrick assumed was Squidward. Instead, the executives at Nick insisted the season focuses mainly on Bubble Bass, therein by making it a glorified Bubble Bass spin-off. The series was canceled after one season, with Wumbo’s only contribution, while credited as ‘Squidward Tennisballs,’ being an episode where Bubble Bass kept screaming about a Mermaid Man credit card. Squnschpunsch Prez was clearly excited when Nickelodeon laid on him the news that they were going to turn his beloved crossover Squnschpunsch into a real series. The excitement fell short as there were some conditions that Prez wasn’t all too satisfied with. Nickelodeon chose not to recast Rick Jones as Maurizio and also suggested having Jacob being voiced by an AI of the late Harry Hill. After some meddling, Chris Pratt was cast as Maurizio while Jacob was voiced by an actual raven that was perched within the Nickelodeon animation studio and sometimes uttered “Nevermore.” Rodger Bumpass remained the voice of Squidward, but the state of the show’s strong promises had diminished. The humor of Squnschpunsch was reduced to bare-bones Squidward torture and gross-out. Even though Nickelodeon lived up to one of the wishes of Prez by having Glass Animals perform “Heat Waves” in one episode, they couldn’t make him happyorr naaaaooooo. It was canceled after one season. Pisces Moon Two spin-offs created by Steel Sponge were greenlit – The Adventures of No Name, which ended up being an unsold pilot, and Pisces Moon, the latter in which Nickelodeon boasted would be their very own Star Wars, to the point where J.J. Abrams would take over in the middle of production, making swift changes to some of the characters, such as giving Sandy an unexplained hatred for sand, and Titan an unorthodox fascination with boxes. Steel’s most notable contribution was including a cameo of Lisa Simpson (or rather, Asil Nospmis, to avoid copyright lawsuits) looked to the camera and said “A company notorious for letting down its consumers reaches out to you to salvage their business, and the very next moment, they sell you down the river. What can YOU do?” before staring at the viewer for five minutes until the episode ends. This, of course, would be the thirteenth and final episode before the series was dropped due to the network not having the budget to let it continue. The Silly Adventures of Patrick Star Despite Nickelodeon already having a Patrick-focused spin-off on their line-up, they thought that one wasn’t enough and decided to greenlight JCM’s own Patrick show. Although things were looking up this time, an abrupt change in management stifled the show’s quality when a production company going by the name of United Seasponge Studios took over. The spin-off ended its run prematurely on the Nickelodeon channel, but it would continue airing on the Skibidi Toilet Kids channel. Skodwarde Skodwarde, created by OMJ, and one of the most popular long-running series in the SBC spin-off archive, was picked up, but a lot of changes had to be made. In order to make Skodwarde more TV-friendly for the network, 4Kids was revived to take up the strenuous task of Bowdlerizing the series until it no longer resembled Skodwarde. All the past edgy and raunchy humor was traded in for puns, the titular character now reads “Eat, Pray, Love” and sings the national anthem in his past-time, the Krusty Krab served jelly donuts instead of Krabby Patties, SpongeBob was given an unexplained Brooklyn accent, and instead of Scotty (the new name given to the title character) using his god powers for evil, he uses them to teach basic and religious morals. Despite all of these drastic changes, OMJ would still manage to include some potshots towards Nick by way of sneaking in caricatured cameos of disgraced former Nickelodeon creators Dan Schneider, Butch Hartman, and John K. to keep the spirit of the original Skodwarde alive. The rights to Skodwarde were then given to Funimation, who were told by Nickelodeon to ‘do whatever the hell you want with it.’ Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000 Despite Jjs’ wishes for an animated version of Scooter’s Paradise, and despite not being a SpongeBob-inspired creation, the executives of Nickelodeon picked up the Riffing Theater for a full series, as they saw greater opportunities with the format. One of those opportunities being allowing SBC members to react to characters from their other shows reacting to their show being canceled (“Bye Bye Beavers” is finally televized to the public as a result). The riffers focused solely on riffing the network itself that forced this on them than on the material being presented to them, and needless to say, they showed no kind words for their bosses. The straw that broke the camel’s back was when one of the subjects of the riffing was footage of Tiny Chef having a half-hour mental breakdown. Even though Nickelodeon wanted this to continue, they still ended up pulling the plug due to all of the riffers quitting. There was a proposal to implement actual SB characters in the series as riffers, but no one wanted to take up the job of mocking Rock from Rock Paper Scissors coping with the cancellation of his show by stress eating pints of ice cream, among other sadistic creations from the Sponge. SpongeBob’s Host Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, wait, you thought I was being serious with this one? Several other failed spin-offs later, and it would be announced that Nickelodeon will go off the air for good, as ViacomountCBSSkydanceKonamiSiliconValleyIKEA would then later file for bankruptcy. The spin-off rights would eventually go back to the respective SBC members and were re-archived on said site. Even though the answers were abundantly clear, when a few former Nickelodeon executives were asked about what went wrong, they would all say they never understood why their versions of the SBC spin-offs failed. When the SBC members were approached about their experiences working with Nick, they didn’t seem to have so much to say… Jjs: Well, you know what they say in Brooklyn – early to bed, early to catch the worm. ...Or, is it the bagel? JCM: Maybe the real spin-offs were the friends we’ve made along the way. Except Skibidi Toilet Kids, they’re not my friends. Steel: I may have gone too far in a few places… OMJ: I was hoping they’d let me make a show about SpringBoob SquirePin. Wumbo: I’m my own man. Prez: It was okay I guess, but that pesky raven still owes me $100. (Quoth the raven: Nevermore.) After all was said and done, the SBC members have all went back to their own normal lives. Whatever remained of Viacom now can’t help but wonder how a ragtag bunch of netizens from an internet community dedicated to a cartoon about a sea sponge could have such a stranglehold on real life events. But hey...that’s just a theory...A SPIN-OFF THEORY! HELLO, INTERNET!- [MatPat was found and subsequently evacuated from the SBC What If’s… studio.]

Banana being by far the favorite answer has some, shall we say, suspicious implications

Welcome back to another fruity poll. This time we are asking what is your favorite fruit. Enjoy.

"Welcome" by Mister Unusual

JUSTICE FOR THE SHOW.

Welcome dear readers. It is I, Cherry Cheesecake Man from Earth-G7! I was a character in an episode of What If until I gained cosmic cherry meta awareness and became the narrator of this episode. That’s what I get for beating a dinosaur with hammers while I was high on cherry cheesecake. Anyways, this isn’t about me. This is about a wacky forum called SBC and their obsession with a yellow kitchen sponge. You might wanna ask, dear reader. What could go wrong If SBCers decide to create a show called SpongeBob? Episode 29: What If... SpongeBob Was Created By SBCers? This is the sacred timeline in which we have a bunch of SBC members talking about their interests. One day, JCM had this crazy idea. JCM: “Hmmm, I just thought of something really fun, members. We should build a time machine!” Everyone was at first confused by what JCM wants to do with a time machine, but they all decided why the fuck not. So every member got together in the USA, they even smuggled WhoBob from Turkey. They all bought gears and products from the same dealer Phineas and Ferb get to build their machines. So they used their brains and muscles to build a perfect time machine. JCM: “Alright, gang, we are traveling back to 1997, to meet Stephen Hillenburg to witness the creation of SpongeBob!” Everyone: “Hooray!” So they traveled back in time but due to the time vortex appearing above Hillenburg, he got sucked into it, leaving him stranded on whatever timeline he went off to. JCM: “Well, shit. We lost the creator of SpongeBob. This could really affect the timeline folks, what are we gonna do!?” Clappy: “I say, we find Hillen-” Prez: “WE CREATE SPONGEBOB IN THE NAME OF STEPHEN!” JCM: “...sure why not. Best to honor our guy.” Clappy: "So I guess we are going with this. Hillenburg will be fine I bet!" So they decide to gather the cast and crew to make SpongeBob. What happens next is very messy. Carotte: “I say we have more SpongeBeak content added here.” Wumbo: “We gotta make Mrs. Puff rougher, make I’M THE HUFF her catchphrase!” Katie: “More focus on Plankton being a bitchy husband!” Steel: “We have to put some Simpsons references on the show too. Kids love references.” Wumbo: “That’s right!” Kat: "We gotta add Todd in the Shadows as a guest star eventually." Dman: "Wouldn't he be too young in this timeline?" Kat: "Don't overthink it. Salmon: "Squidasaurus Rex is appearing many years before the movie cuz I said so!" WhoBob: "Unlike the cowards of post-sequel writers, let's make SquidBob officially canon. We are adding so many gay sex jokes into this show." Cha: "I already am thinking of making bunch of SquidBob plotlines." Omair: "We can't do SquidBob if we don't do Squidiam first!" Winter: “But we can't make this show If we don't have the art style be MarkerBob!” Everyone else: “yep, yep yep.” So they finally made their first season which turned out to be a fucking mess. But the audience loved how horrible this was. It lasted for 6 seasons and a movie. They weren’t aware that people just love their trashy content just as much as they loved a well written show. Even Mr. Enter became a fan of it, much to anyone's surprise. And despite the quality being shit, it made for hilarious memes and tiktok videos people can share with each other. Now this timeline officially became Earth-SBC. And Hillenburg was captured by TVA and got sent into the void with me, Cherry Cheesecake Man. Now we became bestest of pals and spent our days eating nothing but cherry cheesecake and talking about our overlord Doug Ford.

Last time on "DMAN re-attempts to talk about every single CN original in existence", dman talked about yet another one of his childhood favorites. Will today's show be able to stack up? (unintentional pun [well i guess it's intentional now]) #50: We Bare Bears "Our Stuff" [July 27, 2015] So, this one has some personal significance. If you take that list of shows from the first post in this thread and go down the whole thing one by one, this would be the last show on said list that I consistently watched back in the day. Everything afterwards is either stuff I watched on TV once and wasn't a fan of, or stuff I didn't watch at all. That said, there is one show from after that list's time period that I have experience with, but I'll touch on that at a later date. Anyways, the bear show. I remember it being a very comfy show, even if occasionally eyeroll-inducing at points. Let's see if this viewing can help me remember exactly what I mean by that... The episode starts with the bear brothers (Grizz, Panda, Ice Bear) getting ready to play basketball at a local court. They pack their belongings into a bookbag and leave it on a bench while they play. After enough time passes, they are finally able to make one successful shot and begin celebrating outside the court. It takes the bears a good moment before they realize they left their bag back at the court, and they return to find it gone, which sends them into a panic (Panda especially, as his phone was in the bag). The bears try to get a policewoman to help, but they're so loud and awkward that she just rolls away without a word. They also try to persuade a cab driver to take them to all the suspicious places across the city, but this fails for the same reason as before. The trio sit down in a diner, where Grizz speculates how the bag could've been stolen and Panda draws mugshots on the tablemats, much the the server's disapproval. Grizz then remembers a flock of pigeons next to their bag at the court, so the group leave the diner to ask the potential eyewitnesses what they saw. After spreading out Panda's drawings, a pigeon comes forward and picks one drawing out of many, giving the bears a prime suspect. The pigeon promptly takes off and the bears follow it, causing havoc on the streets in the process. Ultimately they end up at the library, where the bears use the public internet to try tracking Panda's phone. Once they narrow it down to an apartment, they find the room of their culprit and make their way in through the outdoor window to get their bag back. The man fights back for a moment, but once the bears get back outside and the police put a spotlight on them, it's revealed they have the wrong bag. Conceding defeat, the bears get ready to jump down and receive their punishment. However (despite the policeman's warning), they jump down all at once, trampolining them into the room of a different building and revealing the true crime scene: the flock of pigeons from earlier in possession of multiple stolen items. The policeman from earlier thanks the bears for catching the Pigeon Cartel in the act, and he also lets them go free while warning them to stay out of trouble, which doesn't look like it'll take long to happen again. The end. You'll see that I mentioned in the SBM thread how I felt this was a clunky first episode, and yeah, that still sorta rings true. The bears' awkwardness is a staple character trait throughout the series, but it's played to an uncomfortable degree here; and most of the human characters aren't that pleasant of individuals either. Thankfully, this show is a case where I know from experience that it is much better than its first episode would imply. When you get to know some of the other characters that are friends with the bears (Chole, Charlie, Tabes, etc.), it becomes a lot more enjoyable to watch. That said, this episode is still decently funny, especially when Ice Bear is involved. No surprise, his monotone delivery and raw skill makes him the best character in the whole show. That's about all I've got here; this episode didn't wow me but I still recommend seeing what else the show has to offer. (Also as for the "eyeroll-inducing" parts I referred to in the opening, this show references a lot of things adjacent to millennial culture and it can get a little embarrassing at times. But whatever, it's tolerable.) THE BOTTOM LINE: It's a show about bears trying to fit in to human society. I'm there. RATING: The episode itself would be lower, but the show gets an 8 (leaning on 7.5)/10 (pretty good). [monotonous] dman wants to see what the Wheel will spin next. Stay tuned for dman's next talk-about. Original post:

return to monke

Times Like These - Paul Akna

Before SBC What If’s, Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000 was one of the most successful works on the community bonding many together. It was permanently laid to rest back in 2023 with Tales from the Internet, which Jjs thought was a perfect note to send it out on even with its ambiguous ending. But what if…it kept going and overstayed its welcome? Episode 28: What If…Jjs’ Riffing Theater Jumped the Shark? The people craved MOAR! In this timeline, Jjs caved to the people’s demands and kept making more Riffing Theater miniseries to mixed results. Clappy and Wumbo also continued to contribute despite protests from one lurker angered that “adults shouldn’t be riffing” because apparently there’s an age limit of when people can no longer contribute to friend projects. I for one appreciate Clappy being able to still occasionally riff while juggling a family in this timeline, great balanced work ethic. However, there were subconscious wonders within the veteran riffers if they could still come out swinging after this long. To balance them out, of course newer members joined along. Some riffers who hadn't appeared in years would also drop by occasionally and cause the Leo pointing meme. Now here’s a speedrun of riffs that occurred in this timeline. Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: Enter the Atrocityverse Because he was the natural punching bag to pick, the riffing crew decided to rip Mr. Enter a new one in this miniseries. There were concerns if they’d be able to say anything that hasn’t already been said about him, but they took the task. One of the obvious picks was his Turning Red review. Enter: This film takes place less than a year after the September 11 terrorist attacks. I bring this up because it radically altered the culture of the time, in ways that make this movie feel exceptionally ignorant of the time. Jjs: Here it is folks, one of the most despised and mocked moments in cartoon reviewing history (also why most of you joined)! I’m gonna bow out and let y’all have fun with this one. Slug: JCM: I’m glad someone else agrees that children’s movies need to have their characters directly look into the camera and address historical tragedies. Ex: So hypothetically let’s say the movie had seriously addressed 9/11, I’m curious what his reaction would’ve been. What if it wasn’t respectful enough?? Careful what you wish for! OMJ: WhoBob: If the movie had addressed it, I hope Mei would’ve said “America deserved 9/11” just to make things more interesting. Steel: For all we know, maybe it takes place in a timeline where 9/11 never happened. That would’ve had many potentially interesting world building implications. Clappy: Something else that’s exceptionally ignorant is denying COVID’s existence. Good thing the film didn’t take place in 2020 instead or Enter would’ve had a tantrum when the characters address it. Enter the Atrocityverse received mixed reviews. While the Turning Red riffs were praised as the standout, the rest of the miniseries didn’t have enough substance to take potshots with beyond Squidward Torture Porn and 9/11 jokes. Users lamented the lack of surreal goofiness that helped make Doug entertaining despite his many faults. Turns out riffing a miserable asshole isn’t that entertaining. Oh well, they can’t all be winners. Many chalked this up to a fluke and hoped that the next miniseries idea would be better. Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: The Gamer Grievances Since riffing a miserable asshole critic didn’t work, the riffing crew tried a goofier critic per Fred’s request. It didn’t get many participants since Irate Gamer was a niche subject. One of the chosen episodes was the infamous Super Mario Bros 2 review which had been a frequent source of memes. Irate Gamer: First of all, there’s nothing remotely familiar in this game that was included in the previous ones. And the real shitshocker is that the villain of the previous game has been replaced by a fat frog named Wart. This makes no sense whatsoever! Jjs: An Italian plumber with super jumping powers fights a dragon-turtle in a magical land of mushrooms and THAT’S what baffles him the most? Fred: What a fuck load of shit…shocker. Steel: It’s like they always say in Brooklyn, the early bird catches the worm…or is it frog? Fa: “Nothing remotely familiar” even though Mario’s in it. Unless that’s a doppelgänger? The Gamer Grievances did not receive much traction since it was a smaller theater. While some liked the more chill style that harkened back to the original Riffing Theater’s smaller projects, there overall wasn’t much to say about Irate Gamer’s antics. Oh well, hopefully the next one’s better. Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: The Critic Chronicles 2 When the other flop critics don’t work for riffing material, you go back to who worked best! The crew chose another batch of Nostalgia Critic episodes not riffed on the first theater. The first episode chosen was Detective Pikachu because we had to shoehorn Pokemon in here somewhere. Chester A. Bum: Critic, buddy, I have to tell you something. That joke is played. Nostalgia Critic: (dismissive laugh) Wait a minute. Are you indicating that I, the Nostalgia Critic... Chester A. Bum: You're gonna do the running joke about always doing running jokes, aren't you? (A collage of NC running gags appears next to NC, including Casper the Friendly Ghost, the Bat Credit Card, Chuck Norris, Frying the Coke, and the Burger King, but NC pushes the gags away) Wumbo: WHERE’S ELEPHANT OMJ: Or the Big Lipped Alligator Moment? Then again, maaaaybe its omission here means Doug still likes it? Jjs: Didn’t he already get this wallowing out of his system in Christmas with the Kranks? This is becoming more stale and tired than Pokemon’s formula. Clappy: For real, how many fucking times is he going to beat this “running gag” of hating his old memes into the ground only to keep using them? We’re not who we were indeed. Kat: Jokes about hating Pokemon and the classic era memes…yep, some things never really change. Slug: REMEMBER THAT DOUG HATES POKEMON? REMEMBER CHESTER A BUM? REMEMBER BURGER KING? I CLAPPED WHEN I SAW THEM! Ex: If we really wanna ride down the nostalgia (hehe) memory lane, can I rewatch Kickassia for the first time while blazed? It’d be better than this. Winter: As someone with minimal NC knowledge, I joined this because of Pokemon, and now I’m completely lost. Great start! The Critic Chronicles 2 received mostly apathetic or negative reactions, with the common sentiment that it repeated itself and added nothing the first Critic Chronicles didn’t already say. Shrek 2 this was certainly not. This permanently put the nail in the coffin of Nostalgia Critic memes for SBC and nobody wanted to talk about him ever again. Jjs publicly apologized and promised no more critic riffs. Whispering sentiment began to circulate that riffing theater might be out of steam. Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: The Simpson Slayer No more critics, so the team took another stab at cartoons. Since Family Guy got riffed, it made sense to riff its cousin too. Jjs had reservations about going through with this but had no better miniseries ideas, so why not? (Which is essentially what happened with Family Guy Funny Moments oops) One of the chosen episodes was No Good Read Goes Unpunished due to an infamous scene that’s been memed to death. Lisa: Something that started decades ago and was applauded and inoffensive is now politically incorrect... What can you do? [scene pans to a photo of Apu] Marge: Some things will be handled at a later date. Lisa: If at all. Jjs: It’s been 8 years since this episode and we’re still waiting on the “later date.” Clappy: 50 seasons later and Apu is still missing from the show under “mysterious circumstances.” Wumbo: Cool, and here I’m still waiting for the actual fucking joke. Slug: Al Jean DESTROYS liberals by…doing nothing at all. WhoBob: Why the hell is Lisa taking the anti-PC stance here? Dman: I’m more fascinated by the implications of them randomly having a photo of Apu in their house. Nuggets: I could write a whole 2012 me essay on why this scene fucking sucks, but that’s giving this spineless nothing “statement” more credit than it deserves. Grown adults really sat down, thought this was an intelligent way to tackle the issue and gave themselves pats on the back lmao. Never fear, We Have Stories For Years Steel: Simpsons predicted it again! The Simpson Slayer received middling reviews. While their efforts were commended, it was painfully obvious the riffers didn’t have much material to riff in the most boring slop imaginable. They learned riffing cartoons are certainly not their wheelhouse, but they tried their best. One user who will remain anonymous also decided to leave the community after this because they couldn’t stand the sight of Homer’s face. Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: And Then There Were Less 3 Deluxe Okay, so critics and cartoons are out. Let’s go back to what once worked: riffing SBC stories! And Then There Were Less 3 was considered the best riff of the original theater’s run, so Jjs decided to “remaster” it for the new generation. This gave people a chance who never riffed the original to have fun. Our story opens to the beautiful scene of the city Las Vegas, and we see a bus arriving in front of a hotel. Fifteen SBCers have arrived in front of a hotel in Las Vegas, getting off a bus. We see Clappy standing in front of a hotel. SpongeOddFan: Uh Clappy, can you explain to us again why we are here in Las Vegas? Clappy: It all started when I rushed into production of this sequel with no plan… Jjs: It's too bad Clappy didn't specify this to begin with on his invitations. WhoBob: Let him enjoy standing in front of the hotel smh. OWM: I hear the gambling odds are nice this time of the year. Trophy: Here to cheer on the Raiders cause they sure could use the support. Dman: Not the SBC meet-up location that I had in mind, but alright. Kat: What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Fred: To film Paul Bart: Mall Cop 2, which was coincidentally also shot in Vegas. Probably not an omen. While members who weren’t on the original appreciated getting a chance to riff it, there wasn’t much of a point to this beyond cheap nostalgia fanservice bait. Also jabs at SOF’s writing are stale and mean spirited by this point. Some unsurprisingly even felt it was inferior to the original. It had mildly more interest than the previous installments due to the subject, but ultimately didn’t change anyone’s outlook on Riffing Theater’s future. Things were looking grim, to say the least. Does Jjs REALLY know how to play the game? Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: Total Drama Alert SBC drama is ratings gold, so in a unique swerve, the team would riff the most infamous moments from banned members in the style of iDubbbz Content Cop. What could go wrong? You already know who would be featured in it. One particular showcase was of a certain rival group that recently collapsed. Skeeter aka BooBooKeys: *spams racial slurs and the Cycord crew stays oddly silent* OMJ: Funny Muffler would never. Fred: Skeeter Valentine would also never. Let’s call this one SKKKeeter. Jjs: Remember when the Cy gang constantly acted “woke” and holier than thou? Yeah, hard to take that all in good faith now. All that’s missing from his rap sheet is sexual harassment and harassing autistic people-oh wait. WhoBob: This was the final straw that made me realize Cy will never change. They attacked others for less, but this was apparently okay. There really isn’t much that sets them apart from 4chan or KiwiFarms. And no, ping spamming isn’t funny. Fuck them. JCM: First time I visited Cy it was filled with slurs, and at the end it’s also filled with slurs. At least it came full circle. Slug: There’s a 50/50 chance he’ll find a lucrative career decrying cancel culture and how he “left the left.” Dman: The bigger question: Does Harold condemn his keys’ behavior? Winter: However, the offended exiled members banded together and sued SBC for defamation, cutting this theater’s run short. Jjs channels his Saul Goodman powers and finds a loophole to quash it. The actual riffs received divided responses; while there were funny moments, most felt it was beating dead horses. Due to nearly causing a lawsuit, some wondered if it was even worth continuing riffing theater at this point. But Jjs was undeterred and had another risky idea. Critikal’s Moist Meter 3000: The Trope Terminator In a publicity stunt to shake things up, Jjs stepped out and had MoistCritikal (guest staring as himself) replace him as lead riffer. Everyone including Jjs himself were surprised they had the budget to afford his talents for a small community. Maybe some new blood is what the theater needs. Critikal would riff tvtropes pages with the SBC members. It was…certainly a bizarre combination, but the community was seated. One page riffed was Critikal's own tvtropes article, how meta! Hype Backlash: Some people who are critical of Charlie’s content find it to be an example of “Internet slop”, mass-produced and low-effort Internet content, combined with his apathetic tone to whatever he’s reacting to. Critikal: Critical of my content, I see what you did there you big brained editors. I’m pretty sure this entry was written by one of Sneako’s alts. I can respect people who don’t like my content, but I’m mostly offended by the insinuation I’m “apathetic” when I personally feel I’ve managed to form a variety with my tonal range over the years. Remember that I was supposed to be an extra in Hunger Games and I got cut for being too good in the role. What a real dookie dogshit stinker of a trope page. It barely scratched the surface of my complex history and half their tropes make no fucking sense. Plugging my page into the Moist Meter, it gets a 20% and that’s being generous. Anyways, the other day I was at Walmart, and this old guy looked at me thinking I was Jesus. He then fell over and died. I might do jail time for that. That’s about it, see ya. Steel: Well…that just happened and I don’t think we were finished the page. I don’t know how to conclude this. Talk about a Gainax Ending. Wumbo: Hilarious in Hindsight Fred: Let’s end this with a Dancing Bear. While Critikal’s involvement amused some people, others did not feel his style jelled well with SBC’s. Several even went as far as to declare this the moment the theater officially jumped the shark, finding the idea of SBC partnering with a popular YouTuber a ridiculous betrayal. It’s also hard to riff tvtropes when it’s already basically parody. At points, people thought to themselves “wait, why the hell am I reading this?” which you’re probably asking right now. The people exited this one more unsure and burnt out on Riffing Theater than ever before, officially declaring it cooked. Jjs was stumped. The team was at a loss on what to do next, feeling they’ve exhausted every idea. Jjs then got one last desperate bold idea to save the theater, and they would do it even if it kills them. Jjs’ Riffing Theater 3000: The Musk Massacre The team would riff Elon Musk’s tweet history. Yes, really. It was certainly no easy task to condense a sea of brainrot into a miniseries. When this was announced, the community was terrified but morbidly curious to see how it’d play out. Elon: Jjs: Freeze Peach. Wumbo: Concerning… Slug: In a shocking move, Elon has banned any discourse of the Confederacy of Independent Systems. Long Live The Empire! JCM: Sad day for any individuals that wanted to discuss the Commonwealth of Independent States. OWM: No Computer Information Systems discussion either. Ex: Time to drop the really big bomb: Elon is in the CIS files. That is the real reason they have not been made public. Have a nice day! Clappy: The term “DOGE” is an offensive slur. Shame on anyone who uses it. WhoBob: Damn, he’s more heartbroken over this than Teslas killing people and Vivian hating him. …But the riffers couldn’t do it. The cringe, the conspiracies, the bigoted dog whistles, the garbage AI memes, the embarrassing begging for Grimes take him back, the flip flopping and deleted posts…it was too much for any sane individual to handle. The cringe ended up killing this riffing team and stopping the theater dead in its tracks faster than Twitter’s revenue stream. It was that bad. And you know what’s worse? Now nobody will ever know the secret meaning behind Tales from the Internet. The screen goes black for good. In loving memory of the Riffing Theater team. The community never forgot their brave sacrifices. Out of respect for the families, riffs were never attempted again. For those who wanted them to die, I hope you’re happy it came to this. Did you know that over 100 people a year die from cringe? It may not seem like much, but it’s more than the amount of fanboys Musk has left now. This is why you should leave well enough alone. Let Riffing Theater rest in peace or this may happen.

"Pink Thing" by XTC.

After fifteen seasons, it makes sense that the writers would finally TRY to make a way for Sandy to TRULY live life underwater; and give a logical reason as to why Sandy can't KEEP that quality! When Sandy's paper about scientific life sounds too cold and LIFELESS (especially by POOR Spongebob's standards), Sandy finally decides its time to try to utilize an experimental machine that can transfer the qualities of a fish; namely Fred, to Sandy and vice-versa her qualities of being a squirrel. Even though Sandy has gills, in a surprisingly realistic outcome; due to muscle memory, it takes her a while before she FINALLY breathes through them! For the first time ever, Sandy can truly ENJOY running through jellyfish fields, eating a Krabby Patty, karate chopping, and even swimming! At first, it seems like the ONLY drawback is that without her suit; Sandy is a lot more vulnerable. But soon, Sandy gains more than gills; she gains fish scales, becomes susceptible to being tempted by the HOOKS (and Spongebob is HORRIFIED thanks to being "Taught by Experience"). But soon, Sandy completely LOSES her scientific mind and becomes a savage fish! Thankfully, since Spongebob KNOWS that Sandy made herself into a fish, she MUST have created an antidote just in case! After tricking Sandy into a pet carrier, he quickly gets Sandy into her tree dome bathtub, and pours the antidote into the bath so that Sandy can change back! The only thing they forgot? Fred is now a GREEN squirrel with furry legs! I'd give this episode segment a 9.9 out of 10! Enough said, true believers!

It seems like the biggest reason I come to this website these days, is to see whether or not anyone has written a review for the latest "Spongebob Squarepants" episodes. Don't get me wrong, I'll write the first review; I just wish that someone ELSE would once in a while. In all honesty, it's about TIME we got a REAL Squidward and Plankton interaction episode. It figures that the one thing they WOULD bond over, is their shared disdain for Mr. Krabs. So much so, that Squidward has written the BEGINNING of a play, and Plankton has written an ENDING! And it's only when the two are joined together, that the two sense an opportunity! They TRY to put the play together. Key word being..."TRY"! However, their artistic egos are SO huge and so specific; they spend MORE time trying to dish out against each other, than against the thinly veiled Mr. Snippers! Is it any wonder why Karen HAD to be the director and cast Spongebob as Mr. Snippers? And even though the play DOES sell out, you know that the performance isn't going to go the way that Plankton and Squidward want when out of ALL of them; Spongebob as Mr. Snippers comes off as the MOST reasonable and well-liked of the three, and Mr. Krabs never even GOT that Mr. Snippers was SUPPOSED to be him! Even though the play isn't a success it wasn't the success that Squidward...let alone Plankton, wanted. I'll give the episode segment a 9.9 out of 10. Enough said, true believers!