Wumbo Ranks Billboard Year-End Hot 100 Charts! (Ahhh, the deed is done.)

[Steel Sponge]

Tough.

I decided on "Creep," because I find myself enjoying it more than "Wonderwall." Between me and the biggest Radiohead fans, I find "Creep" to be pretty overhated, and yet I can see why the song gets a lot of hate. The band itself hates it, as their song "My Iron Lung" (one of my absolute favorite Radiohead songs, btw) would be a given. And yeah, it's the one Radiohead song that everyone knows and that everyone's heard first thing, but most of us would've never discovered how amazing this band is without discovering "Creep." "Creep" at the very least feels very close to the music that Radiohead are highly appreciated for.

Now, between me and most mainstream music critics, I think "Wonderwall" gets a little too much love rather than it gets a little too much ridicule. I'm on the side who thinks that there are far, far better songs from Oasis even though I'd say the same for "Creep." Sure, most of us would've never known the band without discovering "Wonderwall" first, but more and more overtime, I can't kind see why critics love it so much and consider it such a landmark in successful and amazing Britpop music when we also have songs like "The Universal," "Common People," "Animal Nitrate," and even some of their own in "Champagne Supernova" and "Don't Look Back in Anger." It's also because I'm fond of Oasis' more heavier outputs when you compare the emotion and acoustic guitar in "Wonderwall" to generally any other Oasis song that differs in sound.

[CyanideFishbone]

Wonderwall definitely 

[4EverGreen]

I voted for "Wonderwall" because it reminds me of The Beatles. I DON'T believe that Liam Gallagher is the reincarnation of John Lennon as he CLAIMS to be; I just think he has a better idea about how to make music that SOUNDS like The Beatles than MOST people do.

[President Squidward]

I think both songs are fine, but I find myself personally enjoying Creep more than Wonderwall.

[Wumbo]

All right, and "Creep" edges out a victory! The 2003 list will come soon, but in order to tide you guys over, here's another poll.

"Jessie's Girl"

vs.

"Stacy's Mom"

Vote away!

 

[Joe Biden]

"Jessie's Girl" since I can relate to it so bad.

 

Why can't I find a woman like that?

[Rebel the Wolfgirl]

Jessie's Girl, def.

[Wumbo]

I love "Jessie's Girl" 90% of the time, but 10% of the time I find it insufferable. "Stacy's Mom" is a song I can listen to anytime and it cheers me right up.

[Katniss]

Stacy's Mom. It's so fun and that chorus is like a burst of energy.

[CyanideFishbone]

God I'm so split here. They're both just such fun songs. I think I'll go for Stacy's Mom though.

Edited August 14, 2017 by CyanideFishbone

[4EverGreen]

I'm sorry, but I have to go with "Jessie's Girl." Not just because it was MADE in the 1980's, but I just don't find the idea of being romantically attracted to some girl's MOTHER appealing at all.  I don't care HOW hot she is, there are some things that as a person, you just don't DO; it's not appropriate!

[Sweat]

1 minute ago, 4EverGreen said:

I'm sorry, but I have to go with "Jessie's Girl." Not just because it was MADE in the 1980's, but I just don't find the idea of being romantically attracted to some girl's MOTHER appealing at all.  I don't care HOW hot she is, there are some things that as a person, you just don't DO; it's not appropriate!

I'll be the one with Stacy's mom and not you so who wins in the long run

[Burgerpants]

34 minutes ago, 4EverGreen said:

I'm sorry, but I have to go with "Jessie's Girl." Not just because it was MADE in the 1980's, but I just don't find the idea of being romantically attracted to some girl's MOTHER appealing at all.  I don't care HOW hot she is, there are some things that as a person, you just don't DO; it's not appropriate!

I, er, fail to see how proudly stating how you find underage lust good better than admitting someone's mom is kinda hot.

For that exact reason, I'll proudly go with the other, thank you.

[4EverGreen]

Just now, Burgerpants said:

I, er, fail to see how proudly stating how you find underage lust good better than admitting someone's mom is kinda hot.

For that exact reason, I'll proudly go with the other, thank you.

NOWHERE, in "Jessie's Girl," does it state that the girl is under-age! If she's old enough to go out with another guy, than I seriously DOUBT she is under-age!

[Steel Sponge]

I'll let you guys show your precocious crush on guy's mom song and lust for another man's girl song with pride and I'll just skip along with my crush on teacher song, "Hot for Teacher."

But of course, if I'm gonna have to pick one from "Jessie's Girl" or "Stacy's Mom," I'm gonna have to go with the latter. I'm too much of a sucker for good pop punk songs.

Edited August 15, 2017 by Steel Sponge

[Wumbo]

It's finally fuckin' here, folks.

---

I owe 2002 a huge apology, y'all.

 

Was that year particularly great? Well... maybe not, but I did discover a lot of gems that I think I overlooked in my first run-through. And it certainly wasn't as boring as I made it sound. This year, though. ...Yikes.

 

While this may not be the worst year I've covered, as there weren't really that many songs I outright hated, I do think it's one of the most boring. Everything seemed to just be either "decent" or "meh". I couldn't really muster up much of a feeling for many of these songs either way. I still have a good Top 10 list, but this is gonna be another one of those years where the bad list might be a bit of a chore to get through. Excited? Neither am I! So let's get right to it. Here's...

 Wumbo's Bottom 10 Hits of 2003

Spoiler

 

I don't like P. Diddy that much.

10. "Bump, Bump, Bump" - B2K and P. Diddy

 

If you want my honest opinion, P. Diddy pretty much fucking killed rap music for a good five years or so. Or maybe we should blame the public for actually buying his watered-down, commercial crap. But they didn't land on the Hot 100, so I gotta talk about P. Diddy instead.

While this isn't the worst song this guy's been featured on, it's got B2K on it who do a halfway decent job, I just can't endorse much of anything P. Diddy put his name on in the 2000s. It's pretty much the opposite of a seal of quality when it comes to him. And this song is pretty boring otherwise anyway. There's not much said in this song that hasn't already been said a thousand times over by this point. It's really not that bad, but it is one of the most tedious songs on here. And thus, it slipped into the bottom half of my Bottom 10. Such is life.

 

 

Spoiler

 

And speaking of tedious and watered-down...

9. "Can't Stop, Won't Stop" - Young Gunz

 

I'm not really sure what to make of this one. I guess if you're already part of the Young Gunz fanbase, I could see how this song might be fun for you. But to anyone else: how is this anything more than dead air?

I can't help listening to this song and thinking of all the shitty, weaksauce rap songs that followed in the next few years. From Yung Joc to Baby Boy da Prince. All this rap that could have been better replaced by static and been more interesting. This one at least has a beat to it, but I still hear shades of these types of songs in this one. They started appearing around 2002, I think, but any year they come out in, they are tedious as hell. Why would you listen to this when you have Jay-Z or OutKast? Doesn't make sense to me. Can't stop, won't stop, but maybe you should have.

 

 

Spoiler

 

...at least the title's apt?

8. "Don't Wanna Try" - Frankie J

 

Rather than suffer through my "analysis" of this shadow of a song, let's instead take a look at the very brief Wikipedia article written by the world's only Frankie J fan.

This song is about him and his girlfriend. His girlfriend said something that caused them to break up after four years. Frankie J then begins telling how sad he is, and how great it was, such as when he explains that they used to spend hours talking on the telephone and imagine their dream home. Then, he tells us that his girlfriend apparently realized it was a mistake leaving him. She wants to start anew with Frankie. But he doesn't, not after what she put him through. Yet, he still has feelings for her. So basically Frankie J wants this relationship to be over. He still loves her but it just won't work.

Riveting. No, seriously, maybe this song could have worked. But it just feels like the first draft was put through without trying any further. This is how the song begins:

I can't believe you had the nerve to say the things you said
They hurt so bad that they ended our relationship

That's... not a rhyme. As the title goes, you didn't even try. It really comes off like a first draft of a song, without any thought put into any part of it. And as this song is done trying, so too am I done trying to justify its existence. Next!

 

 

Spoiler

 

I wish I had more to say about these songs other than that they're dull and tedious. But... well, here's another dull and tedious one.

7. "All I Have" - Jennifer Lopez ft. LL Cool J

 

It didn't have to be this way. Sure, J. Lo and LL tend to fall on the more tedious side of rap and R&B in general, but maybe pairing them together could amount to something! But... no. I don't buy the chemistry between these two performers at all, and some of these lyrics really come off as... ugly.

Pride is what you had, baby girl, I'm what you have

The hell does this mean? Are we giving up basic dignity for relationships now?

Honestly, this one line is what kills this song for me. Maybe it's meant to sound desperate, but to me it just comes off as awkward and unsettling. Like, you shouldn't have to give up your pride to be in a relationship with someone, and that certainly shouldn't be seen as a bonus, either!

And I could ignore lines like that if the song were more interesting. But it really isn't, so these lines stick out like a sore thumb. This song has no pride in it.

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

This is Natasha Bedingfield, one of the pop music darlings of the mid-to-late 2000s. And whatever you want to say about her music, there's at least a presence there. A seemingly unending, unrelenting bottle of happiness that just infects everyone around her whether they like it or not. Truly, the presence of a star.

It seems like that sort of thing gets hogged by one sibling in a family, because over on the other side you've got Daniel Bedingfield.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4eMyOzD9UI

Now I already covered this pukestain on my 2002 list, but I want to make it clear that this guy is just a totally reprehensible, uncharismatic artist with a terrible voice who makes tedious, ungodly annoying music. And as luck would have it, he had another hit in 2003! On the list you go again, buddy boy.

6. "If You're Not the One" - Daniel Bedingfield

 

Now say what you will about "Gotta Get Thru This". I certainly did, go back and read it if you wish. But at the very least, the song had some semblance of dignity to it. It was annoying as all hell, but it at least feels like the type of music this guy wouldn't mind making. This shit sounds like a Clay Aiken song. As sung by Daniel Bedingfield. Fucking kill me.

And I'm not making assumptions about the artist's intent, either. Daniel Bedingfield himself hated this song. He almost didn't put it on his album because it sounded cheesy to him. No way... this song?? Really?? Well, I hope it was worth giving up your dignity to peak at #15 and be swiftly forgotten by the US soon after while your sister righteously stole your spotlight for the next five years.

Good Lord, what a waste. Like, even for a shitty love song, these lyrics are banal and stupid. And his performance certainly doesn't help. He has such a ridiculously weak voice, like sub-boy band weak. Fuck this guy and fuck this song. Full stop.

 

 

Spoiler

 

I think I've said this about a year in the past, but I'll say it again. 2003 just seemed to be a year where we would willingly hand out pop music success to anyone, no matter how ridiculously untalented they may be. That's the only reason I can think of for this getting popular, because otherwise... why?

5. "Never Leave You (Uh Oooh, Uh Oooh)" - Lumidee

 

Uh oh indeed.

Who gave this girl a mic? Who listened to her sing and thought, "Yes. This girl deserves a hit music career." Her voice is so. God. Damn. Weak. This feels like someone who would get rejected from American Idol. That one person who walks in and says "yeah, I think I'm going to sing an original of mine" and then the judges laugh in her faces, crushing and destroying her dreams beyond repair... holy shit, that show was sadistic.

But maybe it was necessary to stop shit like this from getting on the chart. There is nothing redeemable or interesting about this song. Nothing to grasp onto. That is, until you factor the remix with Busta Rhymes into the equation.

 

But even then, I still feel embarrassed for Busta Rhymes more than anything. Were you strapped for cash, Busta? Or were you just doing volunteer work to help the needy? Either way, don't attach yourself to this shit. There are much better causes than a lost one. I can't even think of anything else to say, it's just trash. And I will be leaving it right now.

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

Oh, John Mayer. Will you ever win?

John Mayer has the unfortunate distinction of consistently making music that simply isn't for me. With one exception, I've pretty much hated everything he's ever put out. I hate his weak-ass voice, I hate his bare-bones instrumentation, and I haaaate that he sings songs clearly out of his depth most of the time.

So a love jam should be right up his alley, right? Seems simple enough. Well...

4. "Your Body is a Wonderland" - John Mayer

 

So I've already mentioned everything I hate about John Mayer. And it happens to all be here, wrapped up in a neat little package just for me. You wouldn't think he'd fail at a simple love song, but, well, here you go, proven wrong. The man knows no lows.

I think it's the combination of Mayer's other traits that kill his ability to carry this song for me. He doesn't sound in love at all. Jason Mraz's "I'm Yours" was lame and stiff in its instrumentation, but at the very least, Jason Mraz sounded in love at some points in the song. I don't feel that with this song at all.

Just this breathy, creepy voice- like, go away, John. Go away for good. You made me compliment 2009 Jason Mraz. How dare you. What a stupid, meaningless, formless song. If this is love, then keep me single.

 

 

Spoiler

 

R. Kelly is perhaps one of the, if not the, most controversial figure in modern pop music. Guy is fucked up out the wazoo, with sex scandal after sex scandal. THE GUY HAS A SEX CULT, FOR FUCK'S SAKE. So it's really hard to praise his music knowing all this, but all the same, you have to keep it somewhat objective.

I listened to "Ignition" again. It's okay. Honestly nothing stands out that much to me about it one way or the other. I could easily confuse it with an Usher song. But at the end of the day, it's nice to have a song of R. Kelly's to rip on this year that proves to be as sleazy and disgusting as he is. Enjoy?

3. "Thoia Thoing" - R. Kelly

 

I actually have no idea what's going on with this song. I'm just going to assume that sound in the chorus is racist somehow. The rest of the song is just as unforgivably sleazy, so why not?

R. Kelly pretty much lifts the style of every artist in his range that was popular this year. Here he is doing Busta Rhymes...

http://ytcropper.com/cropped/yv599beeccdfdd7

Here's him doing Sean Paul...

http://ytcropper.com/cropped/yv599befeb3f7d2

...and none of it works. Not even a bit. This song just feels like a mish-mash of terrible ideas that were dead on arrival. When R. Kelly's music matches his personality, you know something's wrong. That's all I'm sayin'.

"Thoia thoing". What does that even mean? I'm convinced R. Kelly just picked words that sounded ethnic to give his song a more "exotic feel".

http://slangcity.com/songs/thoia_thoing.htm

Holy fuck, I was totally right!

 

The remix, featuring Busta Rhymes once again, because... I guess he was just a masochist in 2003, pretty much has R. Kelly admitting that there is no meaning for "thoia thoing". That he made it up to have a nonsense Asian-sounding phrase in his song to make it seem... cooler? Well, mission not accomplished. This sound is so goddamn annoying, and knowing the backstory behind it, or lack thereof, just makes it that much worse. Fuck this song, and fuck you, R. Kelly.

 

 

Spoiler

 

Okay, so this is not the worst song on this list. Not by a long shot. But if I were to make a list of the songs I least wanted to hear again from this year, this would be near the top. and so it is. Sorry.

2. "Headstrong" - Trapt

 

In my youth, I listened to a lot of rock radio. And the song I most remember being inescapable was this one. I swear to God, I heard it five times a day. And by god, did I get sick of it. Even back then.

Like I said, this pick is almost entirely subjective, because listening to it again, yeah, it's a decent nu-metal song. Certainly better than most of Limp Bizkit's output. But it just suffered the unfortunate distinction of being the song I got the most sick of from this year. When you really look at it, there's not much telling these guys from, say, Three Days Grace. Maybe they have a bit more energy, but honestly, while I don't think this song is bad, it's not standout, either.

And, well, in a year where nearly everything was mediocre, the mediocrity that stuck around like a deep splinter gets the nod for the list. "Headstrong" makes my soul weak.

 

 

Spoiler

 

I'll get straight to the point. This year, there was really only one artist that deserved to be universally reviled in hindsight. That artist was a man called Chingy. (Does that rhyme with "clingy" or "stingy"? Ahh, who cares.)

1. "Right Thurr" - Chingy

 

There were many artists this year who I disliked for a variety of reasons. But my dislike of Chingy is quite simple: he's a talentless buffoon with negative charisma. I legitimately don't know why anyone would listen to this. There were so many artists doing sleaziness right. Hell, at least R. Kelly made interesting music. This is like a pre-cursor to Soulja Boy.

 

Well, I know y'all certainly didn't need a reminder of that. But like, what if Soulja Boy saw Chingy on VH-1 and realized, "hey, it's this easy"? So maybe it's wrong to hate Chingy for speculation. But there are so many other reasons to hate him. His awful voice, his lack of energy or originality. List goes on, my friends. This is the worst hit song of 2003, right hurr.

 

 

[Joe Biden]

I remember liking #4 since I heard it a lot as a kid and thought it sounded cool.

 

It..........never aged well for me.

[Wumbo]

Despite 2003's penchant for having mostly bland, boring songs, there were a few good ones in the mix as well. This was another year straight from my childhood, and many of these songs are as well. This has been long overdue, so if you're ready, then I'm ready! It's...

Wumbo's Top 10 Hits of 2003

Spoiler

 

Call me any name you want in the book, this is still a Top 10 song!

10. "Bring Me to Life" - Evanescence ft. Paul McCoy

 

YEAH! WAKE ME UP...can't... wake up... oh god, why?

Well, what can I say? This song has stayed in the popular conscience for a reason: it, and Evanescence, rock. Something about the post-grunge sound gets pumped up with Amy Lee's operatic voice.

There's also that guy on the chorus, Paul McCoy. It might surprise you to learn that he's from a Christian rock group called "12 Stones". Band name or kidney diagnosis? You decide!

Anyway, he's there because apparently record execs insisted that Amy Lee's vocals couldn't survive on their own, on account of her being female. Not joking. Well, if this is what it took to get this song popular, then I guess I begrudgingly welcome it, but I truly believe Amy Lee could have stood on her own on this one. You can't ignore powerhouse vocals like hers. This song definitely brings me to life and wakes me up.

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

Beyoncé and Jay-Z's relationship has been one of the most high-profile of this millennium. Even if you don't like either artist, you have to admit the impact they made together as a couple on the public mediascape is insurmountable. Beyoncé has become a new Wonder of the World at this point, and Jay is still one of the most respected rappers today, after over 20 years in the biz. So in order to celebrate this pop monstrosity, let's take a look back at their very first collab.

 

No, no, hold on a second. Not yet. This one.

9. "'03 Bonnie and Clyde" - Jay-Z ft. Beyoncé

 

This was the song that, if not inspired these two to start dating, at least hinted that they already are. Interesting that a year later, Jay-Z would profess that a "bitch" wasn't one of his 99 problems he had. But hey, when you're dating Beyoncé, you really have no right to complain about it.

This was actually also Beyoncé's first hit as a solo performer, even though pretty much all of Destiny's Child she was already performing solo. Sorry, Michelle and Kelsey or whoever. She is the perfect sweetness to match Jay-Z's flow. The sample of 2Pac's "Me and My Girlfriend" is fantastic as sung from both perspectives, and I don't know what else to say honestly. It's just a really sweet song by two rich people whose lives are infinitely better than ours. Who's jealous? Not me!

 

 

Spoiler

 

And now, a presentation of Wumbo fucking up! You see, my 2002 list is one riddled with errors. I severely underestimated the year and, thus, underestimated many songs from said year, letting mediocre songs like "Gangsta Lovin'" take a spot in my Top list. Well, now that I'm older and, hopefully, wiser. I can work to remedy these mistakes. I can, shall we say, "work it".

 

Yeah, yeah, whatever. Roll the song.

8. "Work It" - Missy Elliott

 

The sheer talent of Missy Elliott is a fact that unfortunately has been neglected in the first part of my pop song reviews. I love the woman now. She is the pinnacle of early 2000s female rap, saying what all the guys were saying without shame. "I like sex, and I'm not afraid to be filthy about it." Her sheer creativity in the field really shines through here, by actually rapping backwards in the chorus. She actually put her thing down, flipped it, and reversed it.

Just the forceful presence is really enough, though. Missy Elliott's music always demands me to shut up and listen, and I welcome this order with open ears .citsatnaf si cisum s'ttoillE yssiM

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

GAAAH FUCKING KILL IT

Am I too hard on Jason Mraz? Certainly, the guy doesn't mean any harm with his music. It's just that he seems to have two phases. Either he's too esoteric and weird, or too simple and boring. It would be a harmony in heaven if you could take his simple ideas in his writing and mesh them with the more exciting melodies he's capable of. Apparently, he only wanted to do that for one song.

7. "The Remedy (I Won't Worry)" - Jason Mraz

 

This is far and away Jason Mraz's best song, at least according to this guy, and hey, you're not reading anyone else's thoughts, so you may as well listen to me. But seriously, listen to this. He's touching on tangible ideas that we can all relate to, but it's in a song that doesn't sound like white noise. Well... at least not boring white noise.

Yeah, I can totally jam to this without any shame. It's the one time Jason Mraz uses the flow he has to his advantage, and not just to spew out nonsense like "wizard of oohs and ahs and fa-la-las". And I guess if you have one decent song in you, I can't completely write you off. So congratulations, Mraz. you're off the shitlist. Just don't release "I'm Yours, Part II" or anything.

 

 

Spoiler

 

WHEN I MOVE YOU MOVE

6. "Stand Up" - Ludacris ft. Shawnna

 

I really don't have much to say about this that I haven't said about other Ludacris songs. He is just such a fun presence in hip hop music. like if Lil Jon actually dropped bars. He's everybody's fun, crazy uncle. Like Missy, his songs always demand my attention. And this production is fire. Kanye West produces another banger.

Honestly, why are you reading this? Listen to the song, watch this video, and jam out. Just like that.

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

That summer of 2001 is one that many hip hop and R&B fans will never forget. August 25th, 2001. The day Aaliyah died.

I honestly think that with Aaliyah's death came a bit of a noticeable void in the R&B world. Not that people still weren't making hits, but everyone felt the absence of Aaliyah's death and it never quite felt the same after that. Think of the songs she might have made today were she still alive, that's all I'm saying. As it is, her tribute song seems like a fitting choice for this list.

5. "Miss You" - Aaliyah

 

This is such a touching tribute with the music video, with DMX's intro and all the appearances by her friends. As for the song itself, it definitely stands out to me as one of Aaliyah's best. She carries the song mostly with her vocals, with less production than she usually has. Slant Magazine called it "Aaliyah-Lite", which seems about right. Not meant as a jab, but rather a different, nice sound for her. Aaliyah had a beautiful voice, and it's good to just accentuate that sometimes.

As it exists, it also serves as a painful reminder that she is gone with the video. But with this song and many others, her legacy lives on in the music world. Rest in peace, Aaliyah.

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

Of all of the out-of-nowhere hits in the late 90's and early 2000s, count Santana's newfound success with Rob Thomas as one of the out-of-nowheriest. But it did set a precedent for Santana to notch even more hits by playing up the pop side of their sound. and what better way to do that than to get one of the most contemporary pop artists around at the time to sing?

4. "The Game of Love" - Santana ft. Michelle Branch

 

Oh hell yeah, you better believe this song is embedded in my inner consciousness.  Don't care what y'all say. I love Michelle Branch's voice. Maybe she's a bit bland artistically, but y'know, that's exactly what this song fixes! Pump it up with some good Latin rock vibes.

There's really no other band that tried to do what Santana did over the course of this decade. You didn't hear Led Zeppelin collaborating with Ludacris, or Judas Priest making room for Mario. But Santana kept doing this shtick throughout the decade, even with Michelle Branch more than once! But I'd count this song as one of the best collabs in that sense. It's just so fun. A little bit o' this, a little bit o' that, and you got yourself a bonafide pop jam.

 

 

Spoiler

 

All right, the flirting stage is over. Now let's really get into the Jay and Bey relationship.

3. "Crazy in Love" - Beyoncé ft. Jay-Z

 

There are two types of people. People who believe this is one of the finest songs to come out this century, and liars. Like, no one can deny how much of a jam this is. If you try, you will be met with laughter and criticism. By me. I'll be doing the laughing. Ha ha ha ha.

There is not a moment of this song that isn't captivating, interesting and energetic. Jay-Z and Beyoncé both do amazing jobs to complement this bombastic beat. That chorus is fire, but so are the verses. And the rap. And the bridge. It's all so bloody fantastic. I'm crazy in love with it.

 

 

Spoiler

 

So, I've talked about Missy Elliott. I've talked about Ludacris. But the two of them together in one song? Well, that's where the real magic happens.

2. "Gossip Folks" - Missy Elliott ft. Ludacris

 

I mean, I've said this before. you get two of the biggest talents and most interesting personalities in hip hop together at the time, you can't go wrong. This song is just fantastic.

Missy Elliott has never been one to shy away from attitude, and this is one instance where it's completely justified where she shoots down people who spread rumours about her. And as usual, Ludacris is just fantastic in his own Ludacris-y way. He was certainly doing better than Busta Rhymes this year, by pairing with songs that were actually great and not... shit.

I love this beat, too. It's so simple, but it's yet another one of those classic Timbaland beats. Edgy, but doesn't overshadow the mammoth personalities of Missy and Luda. But really, what could? "Gossip Folks" is a fantastic track, only outclassed by one this year.

 

 

Spoiler

 

I really didn't want to do this. Especially since it's yet another song I overlooked on my 2002 list, just missing the cut for the Top 10. But really, even with all the great stuff this year, there was really no question as to who I ultimately had to give top prize to. Ladies and gentlemen... the incomparable Eminem.

1. "Lose Yourself" - Eminem

 

Y'know, amidst all the "mom's spaghetti" memes, people forget just how successful, lauded, and powerful this song was at the time. It was fucking inescapable, and for good reason. It won the Oscar for best original song, and for good reason. it was Eminem's best-selling single, and... well no, it's not his best song. But you can see why it'd be his most popular. The song has force and showcases Eminem's unbelievable skill at lyric writing and spitting, backed by a fantastic rock beat that really wasn't being done by anyone else at the time.

While, like I said, I don't think this is Eminem's best, Eminem has released such quality tracks that even a merely good one by his standards ends up being stellar as well. I'm sure even as he rose his way to a household name, Eminem couldn't expect this level of notoriety with one song. But that's the power that one song can have. And "Lose Yourself" oozes power, making it an instantly memorable and long-lasting song.

...Okay, fine.

 

MOM'S SPAGHETTI!

 

Full List:

 

Spoiler

 

1. "Lose Yourself" - Eminem

2. "Gossip Folks" - Missy Elliott ft. Ludacris

3. "Crazy in Love" - Beyoncé ft. Jay-Z

4. "The Game of Love" - Santana ft. Michelle Branch

5. "Miss You" - Aaliyah

6. "Stand Up" - Ludacris ft. Shawnna

7. "The Remedy (I Won't Worry)" - Jason Mraz

8. "Work It" - Missy Elliott

9. "'03 Bonnie & Clyde" - Jay-Z ft. Beyoncé

10. "Bring Me to Life" - Evanescence ft. Paul McCoy

11. "Beautiful" - Christina Aguilera

12. "Where Is the Love?" - The Black Eyed Peas

13. "I Can" - Nas

14. "Are You Happy Now?" - Michelle Branch

15. "Forever and for Always" - Shania Twain

16. "Rock Your Body" - Justin Timberlake

17. "Get Low" - Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz ft. Ying Yang Twins

18. "Superman" - Eminem

19. "Like a Stone" - Audioslave

20. "Underneath It All" - No Doubt ft. Lady Saw

21. "Rain on Me" - Ashanti

22. "I'm with You" - Avril Lavigne

23. "Why Don't You and I" - Santana ft. Alex Band

24. "Real Good Man" - Tim McGraw

25. "Don't Know Why" - Norah Jones

26. "Put That Woman First" - Jaheim

27. "Sing for the Moment" - Eminem

28. "I Want You" - Thalia ft. Fat Joe

29. "Air Force Ones" - Nelly ft. St. Lunatics

30. "How You Gonna Act Like That" - Tyrese

31. "In da Club" - 50 Cent  

32. "Come Over" - Aaliyah

33. "Jenny from the Block" - Jennifer Lopez ft. Jadakiss and Styles P

34. "Say Yes" - Floetry

35. "Miss Independent" - Kelly Clarkson

36. "Sick of Being Lonely" - Field Mob

37. "Step in the Name of Love" - R. Kelly

38. "Excuse Me Miss" - Jay-Z

39. "19 Somethin'" - Mark Wills

40. "No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems" - Kenny Chesney

41. "Have You Forgotten?" - Darryl Worley

42. "So Gone" - Monica

43. "Don't Mess with My Man" - Nivea ft. Jagged Edge

44. "Magic Stick" - Lil' Kim ft. 50 Cent

45. "Picture" - Kid Rock ft. Sheryl Crow

46. "When I'm Gone" - 3 Doors Down

47. "Love of My Life (An Ode to Hip-Hop)" - Erykah Badu ft. Common

48. "Clocks" - Coldplay

49. "Fighter" - Christina Aguilera

50. "Thugz Mansion" - 2Pac

51. "Beautiful" - Snoop Dogg ft. Pharrell and Charlie Wilson

52. "The Jump Off" - Lil' Kim ft. Mr. Cheeks

53. "Baby Boy" - Beyoncé ft. Sean Paul

54. "Unwell" - Matchbox Twenty

55. "My Front Porch Looking In" - Lonestar

56. "Frontin'" - Pharrell ft. Jay-Z

57. "It's Five O'Clock Somewhere" - Alan Jackson ft. Jimmy Buffett

58. "Can't Hold Us Down" - Christina Aguilera ft. Lil' Kim

59. "No Letting Go" - Wayne Wonder

60. "Damn!" - YoungBloodZ ft. Lil Jon

61. "Landslide" - Dixie Chicks

62. "Ignition (Remix)" - R. Kelly

63. "Angel" - Amanda Perez

64. "Like Glue" - Sean Paul

65. "21 Questions" - 50 Cent ft. Nate Dogg

66. "Here Without You" - 3 Doors Down

67. "Mesmerize" - Ja Rule ft. Ashanti

68. "This Is the Night" - Clay Aiken

69. "Wanksta" - 50 Cent

70. "My Love Is Like... Wo" - Mýa

71. "What Was I Thinkin'" - Dierks Bentley

72. "In Those Jeans" - Ginuwine

73. "Rock wit U (Awww Baby)" - Ashanti

74. "Hell Yeah" - Ginuwine ft. Baby

75. "Shake Ya Tailfeather" - Nelly, P. Diddy and Murphy Lee

76. "Cry Me a River" - Justin Timberlake

77. "Holidae In" - Chingy ft. Ludacris and Snoop Dogg

78. "Flying Without Wings" - Ruben Studdard

79. "Suga Suga" - Baby Bash ft. Frankie J

80. "Get Busy" - Sean Paul

81. "I Know What You Want" - Busta Rhymes and Mariah Carey ft. Flipmode Squad

82. "Red Dirt Road" - Brooks & Dunn

83. "Intuition" - Jewel

84. "Into You" - Fabolous ft. Tamia

85. "She Hates Me" - Puddle of Mudd

86. "Drift Away" - Uncle Kracker ft. Dobie Gray

87. "P.I.M.P." - 50 Cent

88. "Can't Let You Go" - Fabolous ft. Lil' Mo and Mike Shorey

89. "Calling All Angels" - Train

90. "Beer for My Horses" - Toby Keith ft. Willie Nelson

91. "Bump, Bump, Bump" - B2K and P. Diddy

92. "Can't Stop, Won't Stop" - Young Gunz

93. "Don't Wanna Try" - Frankie J

94. "All I Have" - Jennifer Lopez ft. LL Cool J

95. "If You're Not the One" - Daniel Bedingfield

96. "Never Leave You (Uh Oooh, Uh Oooh)" - Lumidee

97. "Your Body Is a Wonderland" - John Mayer

98. "Thoia Thoing" - R. Kelly

99. "Headstrong" - Trapt

100. "Right Thurr" - Chingy

 

[Steel Sponge]

Thoughts on:

Unwell

Here Without You

I'm with You

Landslide

Where Is the Love?

Clocks

Fighter

Jenny from the Block

Suga Suga

Forever and for Always

She Hates Me

Beer for My Horses

and last but definitely not least....Have You Forgotten?

Edited August 30, 2017 by Steel Sponge

[Joe Biden]

I really hate being one of those people who really say stuff like "I knew that would be #1" (go to 1977 and 1971's lists) but I totally knew that you would make Eminem your #1.

 

Anyways, as usual:

Beautiful

Why Don't You & I

Get Low

When I'm Gone

Don't Know Why

Calling All Angels

Drift Away

Ignition (Remix)

Sing for the Moment