SBC's Top 50 Worst Episodes Ever 2015 Edition

[PatrickFan1]

19: I like this episode. I love the jokes here and this was the first season 9 episode that I've seen.

18: I have completely forgotten this episode. But very boring.

[Clappy]

Now that I've got both lists available, we commence the countdown.

 

 

16. Demolition Doofus

 

 

112 points. 8 out of 23 lists. (#1 Cha)

 

SpongeBob goes to boating school and then continues to crash into two cars, inflating Mrs. Puff every time he continues to crash into an obstacle. Mrs. Puff then inflates so much, she sends the car airborne. SpongeBob then crashes the car into the lighthouse, injuring Mrs. Puff. In the hospital, Doctor Forrest clarifies that Mrs. Puff's inflation sac was popped in the collision and she will not be able to "puff" again. Mrs. Puff has to be tranquilized after she leaps on to SpongeBob and man-handling his nose. SpongeBob then begins to ramble and the doctor tranquilizes him as well. SpongeBob then visits Mrs. Puff with a bouquet of flowers along with the hundreds of other flowers he sent her, which she appears to be allergic to. After forcing her into a wheelchair, he pushes her down the hallway. Doctors are seen sprinting through the hallway with muscular men on the gurneys. SpongeBob stops Purple Doctorfish and asked what was going on. He replies the Demolition Derby are about to battle in the hospital room. It appears that they are hitting each other with wheelchairs. Mrs. Puff imagines them smashing into SpongeBob and killing him. Her laughing attracts SpongeBob's attention, and she claims she has a way for him to earn "extra credit." After talking to Captain Lutefisk, she shows him how much damage SpongeBob can do with a boat, though he is just using a steering wheel. Lutefisk says he is perfect for the derby. At the derby, Mrs. Puff is enraged at how SpongeBob is defeating the competitors only by serendipity. She then grabs a tractor and starts to chase after SpongeBob, trying to smash him. They then collide into the boating school, where Mrs. Puff regains her "puff," before they get crushed by the school.

 

Clappy: You know, last go around, I was willing to defend this episode and Puff Mama's sanity finally snapping when SpongeBob crippled her.  I was willing to defend the twisted psychotic element, but I've been thinking lately after not only rewatching this but with all the One Coarse Meal hate.  Why should we defend Puff for trying to murder SpongeBob?  Watching her character go through this sort of extremity was just creepy.  Granted this is by no means One Coarse Meal bad, but what had this episode not work was that every character involved became extremely unlikeable.  Even bloodthirsty Puff, who despite having a history of getting physical harm towards her, just took a complete 180 out of nowhere.  While this didn't make my Bottom 25, this is still pretty bad.  

Steel: I can agree why this is considered one of the worst episodes in most recent memory. However, being one of the more optimistic, positive-minded Spongebob fans, I don't get deep hatred from this. Mrs. Puff's flanderization goes over to the point where she's blood-thirsty, but I think it makes senses that her character goes over the limit. We've seen how Mrs. Puff progressively loses her sanity over Spongebob and the fact that Spongebob causes Mrs. Puff to even deflate in the episode makes sense that Mrs. Puff would become THAT crazy. It would've worked if Mrs. Puff just didn't feel so bloodthirsty. What I didn't like about the episode was, obviously, Mrs. Puff's character being overexaggerated, and that the jokes don't really work at all. I've seen worse post-movie episodes though. I can't say I hated this episode too, cuz' my thoughts dwindle on whether or not I think it's just fair or mediocre

Nuggets: I can't say I care much about this one. Mrs. Puff goes wild and perhaps a little out-of-character, but I like it for what it does. The racing element was a nice twist, and I feel that Puff's character change was justified, and led to a lot of funny stuff. If you really hate character derailment then I guess this one isn't for you, but this one didn't touch my list. I see why it's here, but there's a lot worse, in my opinion.

 

Plus, SpongeBob in that sock is just too cute, man.

 

 

 

15. Clash of Triton

 

 

116 points. 8 out of 23 lists. (#4 Katniss)

 

On King Neptune's 5,000th birthday, his wife Queen Amphitrite calls the Krusty Krab and sets reservations to celebrate King Neptune's birthday there. Mr. Krabs sets up a crowd of watchers for some extra money after Shubie wanted to watch the royal family eat through the window, and SpongeBob cooks 5,000 Krabby Patties for King Neptune just as he arrives.

However, King Neptune is overly depressed about his son, Triton, when SpongeBob mentions him. Neptune shows everyone a movie that he made about his sad separation with Triton, locking him in a cage in the Island in the Sky until he learns to become a proper god like his father. To ease King Neptune's pain, SpongeBob plans to go to the Island in the Sky and release Triton from his shrunken cage (according to Neptune, the cage only shrinks 7%). Unfortunately, the lock on the cage was impossible for SpongeBob to undo. So, he then asks Patrick, his best friend, to unlock it.

 

Luckily, Patrick was able to unlock the cage. Triton comes out and offers the two a "ride" after turning the cage into a car, which SpongeBob and Patrick accept. But Triton pulls over when they were halfway there and tells SpongeBob and Patrick he doesn't need them anymore, knocking them out of the car with one whip of his tail. He immediately goes to Bikini Bottom and destroys it to have revenge on his father for locking him up. Then SpongeBob and Patrick return to Bikini Bottom and see the destruction. They both realize that Triton was locked up for a reason. They sneak into the Krusty Krab using the secret entrance, which led to inside the grill. SpongeBob tells Patrick to be very quiet.

 

Patrick agrees, but unfortunately throws the top of the grill backwards, making a loud clashing noise. The two peek from behind the cashier window and see that Triton has locked up Neptune and all the party goers in a cage. Neptune apologizes to Triton and begs him to release everybody else and take him instead, but he ignores him. Then SpongeBob and Patrick unlock the cage staying hidden in the grill. Triton, in great dismay, says to his father that he was only kidding and tries to run... er... swim away. But an angry Neptune catches him by appearing in front of him. Triton tries to tell him that he didn't mean to lock him in a cage, but his father thought he has gone too far.

 

Neptune then saw what Triton did to Bikini Bottom and angrily asks him if he was responsible for it. Triton begs Neptune not to send him back to the cage. But Neptune, instead of punishing him, says that he just gave him the best 5,000th birthday present he has ever received. Triton learned to use his powers at long last, and that was what Neptune wanted all along. Both father and son hugged with everyone cheering for them. Then, with Amphitrite, they return home. As they leave, Neptune says this was all because of SpongeBob. But everybody hears what he said and begins to hate SpongeBob. The episode ends with SpongeBob and Patrick running for their lives as the citizens of Bikini Bottom form a mob and chase them.

 

Clappy: While Truth or Square will forever be my most hated special, this was by far the most forgettable.  Which it has no means to be with the premise and how promoted it was.  This special had no right to be this underwhelming.  Once again, overpromoted.  Once again, poorly paced.  But holy crap.  With all the legendary folklore and an antagonist that could have been memorable, this had all the makings to be a great special.  This is just a prime example to how a good idea doesn't always equal to good execution.  What a waste of potential.

Steel: People and "special episodes," I'd tell ya. While "The Great Patty Caper" is why I'm always going to expect the worst for any future "special episodes" nowadays, but with Nick's truth-stretching hype being ruined by the final result, this episode can also been seen as a shining example of how not only a special episode can end up being an utter mess regardless, but an another example of why I always suspect that any future special is going to be another one of the worst. I wouldn't call this the worst special, or even a mediocre/bad/terrible episode in my eyes, but still, it could've been a lot better. In some areas, it's a mess. I'll admit, the jokes are good....just by a little bit, the plot isn't really all that exciting and memorable, and most of the all: the ending where Neptune and Triton have their heartwarming moment gets zigzagged when the episode really ends with Spongebob and Patrick getting chased by an angry mob while Mr. Krabs.....just stands there just to show how devastated he was because he didn't get any money, I guess. (It's been long since I last saw the special, honestly) As usual, I'll say the writers at least tried, but this special was just pretty bland.

Nuggets: Man, Triton.

 

This episode aired on my birthday, I think I turned 12. Triton is notoriously bad. Many of the problems lie within the episode itself. Within the episode, we're treated to poor pacing, a first half that spends a little too much time establishing a conflict, and then a rush-job of an ending and in addition to that, we receive a special packed with Season 6 goodness. Gross-out gags, art from Robertryan that's just not fitting, jokes that just don't hit, and overall just a boring feel. However, even within that Triton is not entirely un-salvageable. Some jokes are funny, and the plot has an inkling of potential. It's interesting on paper. Triton's problem has almost nothing to do with the episode itself, however. Triton's biggest problem is that it is simply what it is- a mediocre Season 6 "special", a final, particularly big turd laid to rest upon the sh*tpile that is Season 6.

 

But it didn't have to be.

 

My biggest problem with current SpongeBob (and by current I guess I mean pretty much everything Post-Season 5) is that it is not inventive. Say what you will about Seasons 4 and 5, but they are the last vestiges of "classic SpongeBob" to me. SpongeBob made it's mark back in 1999 by being this crazy, weird little thing that didn't really make any sense, but that's why it caught on- it was different. It wasn't a show about little assholes running around the throes of childhood, or meek animals in a crazy world, it's this different show about an aquatic optimist, that could go into space with his Squirrel friend, or go hermit into the wild with the jellyfish, or just make a stand for blowing stupid bubbles. You don't see that anywhere else. You never will see that done as well as those Season 1 episodes did it, because that is some original stuff. That's wild, that's creative. The show continued, and got more about the jokes than the emotional stuff, but even as the show began to focus more on comedy, it still stayed fresh and inventive. Krusty Krab Training Video is an exercise in a complete format switch-up and passes with flying colors. 

 

Season 4 is still quality, and while the writing takes a small dip, the animated upswing makes up for it, and I lump it in with the classic seasons. Season 5 is tricky. The writing takes a sharp downturn. The animation takes a dip and becomes less fun. Horrible elements start popping up in episodes like Fungus Among Us, the like. However, Season 5 is home to the last episode I'd consider a true classic, Friend or Foe. There are still classic elements in Season 5- the music, Derek Iversen still a sound engineer, the atmosphere, etc. After Season 5 though, everything starts slowly fading away, including that inventive uniqueness. 6 and 7 are unparalleled sh*t, and even though 8 is an upturn on the level of 5, imo, it is still derivative. Mooncation goes in a different direction than Sandy's Rocket, but they can be boiled down to the same basic premise.

 

Remember that whole "spongebob was popular back in the day because it was different" paragraph? That whole paragraph is Adventure Time. A show that came out in a strange era and was unabashedly silly and weird and crazy. And it just proved to be more and more different as it became a more adult show as it went along. AT is a whole different beast than SpongeBob. SpongeBob's worst aspect is that it does the same things over and over with minor improvements each time that it's been doing since Season 6, which in itself is just the same stuff from the first 5 seasons but written worse. By doing the same thing, SpongeBob continued to be itself in a world where everyone wanted to be SpongeBob, so by the time the fame started winding down, SpongeBob saw he wasn't so different from everyone anymore. So it's time to change. Adventure Time changed (mostly for the better) and thus hasn't stagnated like SpongeBob.

 

So why the whole spiel on the downfall of the series, Nuggets? Well, I'm glad you asked, hypothetical member of society. Season 6, for all of it's trash, never had a chance to be good. Minus short bursts of fresh brilliance like Toy Store Of Doom, Season 6 is full of garbage like Shuffleboarding ("wow this sounds like a great idea for an episode") that isn't even plotted on a basic level of coherency - that is, the very basis for half of Season 6's plots aren't sound. They're dumb.

 

The problem is that Triton's premise is not dumb. At all. In fact, it's almost fantastic.

 

It was like an attempt to go Adventure Time Season 3. It's, at the core, a funny little story, but beneath, there's a deeper message. It's got a running theme of rejection and acceptance and the desire to be different that fits in with SpongeBob's most major theme. It's pretty much entirely based on a giant continuity reference to a Season 1 episode and character. And it's got these little touches of adventure and grandeur that feel slightly more cinematic than most of SpongeBob's other adventures. This is everything I have ever wanted from SpongeBob's current state. Emotion, actual themes, a dash of adventure, of freshness.

 

So it's just horrible to watch the episode go and crap on all of that in favor of a story that you can feel straining for time trying to wrap up everything at the end. Every theme in the episode is teased but never expanded on, or, at worst, shat upon ("hey what's up dad i realized you were right mortals are sh*tty"). Triton is built up to be this huge important and deep character, but ends up amounting to basically the biggest dick in the series to pretty much everyone for no reason besides the fact that he feels like it. The jokes are fine I guess. 

 

Triton just bothers me because it has every opportunity to deepen the series, it's lore, and squanders it. Clash could have perhaps changed the entire course of the series, had it not been botched so badly. And what's worse is that it's not even actively bad. It's just poorly paced. If it had an additional 15 minutes, it could have been one of the best specials ever. If that pacing didn't entirely screw up the episode, we could've had an actual classic. But instead, we get a half-slow, half rush-job of an episode, and then we get 15 extra minutes added to a freakin' bottle episode.

 

I really feel that had Triton been written as well as it had been, we'd have a very different show right now. 
 

"wow, maybe we can experiment more with directing teams!"

"whoa, we can tackle deeper themes!"

"wow, we have a whole world of characters to work with here!"

"dude, we can reference older stuff!"

"crazy! we can start making our season finales really pack a wallop now!"

 

But no. Instead we got Season 7. Triton is a metaphorical nail in the coffin. It solidifies just what the series would become, and to an extent still is- a show (while slowly getting back to those glory days) living on the coattails of things far better, trying to repeat the success of formulas that worked in the past, to no avail.

 

I've said before that I look at SpongeBob and Patrick running away at the end of the episode as a (unintentional, of course) metaphor for them running away from the quality of Season 6, but that was back when I looked at Season 7 as a whole improvement. Now, it takes on a much more depressing visage, now that I see how much this episode could've done. It's not the two running away, but rather trying to escape something - the  Bikini Bottomites, yeah, but it makes a lot more sense for them to represent just better writing, better plotting, better everything. SpongeBob isn't running away from the poor quality of Season 6, he's running away from quality in general. Just like Triton, the two are chased by it, and in a slight glimpse, it seems like the quality- or the mob, if you will - is going to reach them. That the mob might get Sponge and Pat, just like quality, could've reached this episode. This could actually happen. But the episode cuts out before it does. They get away.

 

There's just not enough time.

[Katniss]

While I don't exactly like Demolition Doofus, it still didn't make my top 25. I guess I could understand why Mrs. Puff snapped, but that doesn't stop this episode from being a bit unsettling.

 

The Clash of Triton, oh yes...this special was a big stinker in my eyes. I think this is an even bigger waste of potential than Truth or Square. I don't even care about Mindy not being in there, but I wish the Triton and Neptune backstory had been developed better. Neptune is proud of Triton for destroying Bikini Bottom in the end? What? I didn't think it was that funny and I agree that the pacing sucked.

[Jjs Goodman]

15: Honestly, I just can't get behind the hate for this one. Yeah, SpongeBob's obliviousness was annoying, I can understand that criticism. But I loved seeing Mrs. Puff go insane, even if it was over the top. I mean, after Summer Job, I kind of understood where Mrs. Puff was coming from. The racing theme was cool and there were a few decent gags here and there. I guess if you don't like character derailment, then yeah, this isn't for you, but I dunno, I just liked this side of Mrs. Puff. Oh well, I guess the darker tone doesn't work for everyone.

14: Yeah, just copy and paste what Nuggets said and you got my thoughts. This made my list right at #13. Not enough for my Bottom 10, but man, this was one of the biggest letdowns of the series. So much they could've done, yet they did so little.

[Metal Snake]

dat speech Nugs... *sniff*

 

...

 

Oh yeah, thought time...

 

Demolition Doofus: Don't get me wrong, I can see why people would not find this one that bad as I used to be one of those people. But now, I really do not like this episode. I find the whole racing thing to be quite dull, to be honest, and the conflict between Mrs. Puff and Spongebob doesn't engage me because I really dislike the way both of them acted.

 

Clash of Triton: I definitely agree that this was one of the weakest specials. They wasted so much potential to the point where the plot was just...rubbish. Neptune locks Triton away for...caring about mortals. And in the end, everything is cool because he...destroyed the town, showing that he doesn't care about mortals. ...You can't be serious.

[Wumbo]

Not gonna touch Clash of Triton because hot damn Nuggets marry me <3

 

But Demolition Doofus is an episode that has definitely slipped in my eyes over the years. More and more to me it plays like a fanfiction of SpongeBob where Mrs. Puff goes off the deep end and tries to kill SpongeBob. It's like Plankton getting the formula. It just shouldn't happen in canon with the series. But it did, and we're just supposed to accept it? No thanks. Didn't make my list as it is at least a fascinating sort of bad, but it's an episode that feels wrong.

[Less_SpongeBob]

16: This made #4 on my list. But even that's an understatement, because it's THE ONE I HATE THE MOST. It's more that SpongeBob You're Fired and my unrevealed #3 have more problems, including lack of attempted jokes and a less structured story. Ironically, if SpongeBob had any degree of continuity, it'd be great. It would be a very invigorating revenge sequence for all the years Mrs. Puff had to deal with, only for her to go too far with the murder as it progressed, allowing for the irony of SpongeBob's winning to release some good comedy. However, all we have to work with is the one incident where she popped, and quite frankly I don't see any disadvantage in her skinnier size. This small thing the show lacked made Mrs Puff seem like a psycopath and SpongeBob like he has no morality, thus, you root for neither of them. When the actions aren't justified, they're annoying and disturbing. It literally went to the point of putting directly stated murder in her head. And just because Mrs. Puff is worse than SpongeBob doesn't make SpongeBob ANY better. It is extremely out of place and really screwed up.

 

15: This guy was my #10. The main problem with most specials is that it either doesn't have a strong enough plot for the runtime, or it has an amazing idea that's really underdone. This falls under the latter. It clearly wants to delve into the complex relationship between the father and the son and see how horrible the experience can be if done wrong, and it seems to want to have some really epic and emotional moments, but there are limits to where a show can and cannot go, and this is clearly too far for the staff. Instead, we get useless filler in Neptune's Party, both sides looking like complete dicks (Neptune casting away his son for, uh, wanting to help people? Triton destroying the city with the cliche teenager token? I don't think so), the "battle" was limited to one side and was only given minutes, and our "hero" does nothing after he releases Triton. The heartwarming moments didn't work because it was just the dad turning the guy evil because, hypocrisy. It felt like nothing happened by the end of it. Heck, even when I first watched the special, I swore there had to be at least 11 more minutes after it "ended." Just a huge waste coming from goals far too high.

 

Oh yeah and then they decided to scrap Mindy in favor of this new character. That could really add even more perspective and emotion.

[PatrickFan1]

Both are not on my list. I like Mrs. Puff in the first episode because she is my favorite character after Patrick and here it is was an another side from her. And Clash of Triton is very bad. 

[Clappy]

14. Choir Boys

 

 

120 points. 8 out of 23 lists. (#4 Rev)

 

Squidward takes a shower and gets dressed, and prepares to audition for open chair at the Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus. When he steps outside, SpongeBob is lying on the ground, depressed. SpongeBob tells him that the reason he is so sad is that Patrick is out of town for a family reunion, and he needs someone to play with and something to do until Patrick gets back. SpongeBob asks Squidward where he is going, and asks Squidward if he can come with him. Squidward says no. SpongeBob tries to show Squidward he can sing, but Squidward rides off, leaving him in the dust. SpongeBob digs a pothole, and when Squidward falls into it, he tumbles into Jellyfish Fields, where a swarm of jellyfish surround and sting him as SpongeBob takes advantage of his "captive audience."

 

Later, Squidward is back to riding his recumbent bicycle. When he sees he is almost late, he takes a detour through grass, where he is stopped by SpongeBob, who is dressed as a policeman. He gives Squidward a ticket for "reckless frowning" and not listening to him sing. Squidward rips off his mustache, yells at him, ties him to coral with some kelp, and rides off. When Squidward sings "figaro,"  SpongeBob also sings, generating sound waves which cause the kelp to fall apart and attract jellyfish, which carry him away.

 

Meanwhile, Squidward arrives in time and takes his place. After spending a considerable amount of time clearing his throat, the music begins and he sings along, quite poorly. SpongeBob, carried by jellyfish, comes in, singing. The people find his voice beautiful and give him the open chair, as well as a mustache which he wears. SpongeBob accepts, but only if they find a spot for his "inspiration and great friend," Squidward. They agree. During the concert, SpongeBob sings. Squidward is in charge of turning the pages of his songbook, which he does with a bitter look on his face.

 

Clappy: While I don't really hate this episode as much as others, I can definitely see it's inclusion on here being justified.  SpongeBob is at one of his pinnacles of being an absolute creep here stalking Squidward for no real reason than to pester him.  Meanwhile, Squidward suffers unnecessary cruelty for no real reason that I can justify this being a "Squidward sabotage" episode.  Not to mention the fact that the jokes here are virtually nonexistent.  But it's worse offense is just being dull and tedious.  This episode can just figa-GO AWAY.

Rev: Oh god, not this episode. Please, not this one. Please, just spare me, I'm too young to die! If I could describe this episode in one word it would be: Die. Die already. This episode is nothing but "plot device Patrick is gone for whatever the hell he does so we can torture Squidward for just wanting to go to a choir getting him stung by jellyfish and stuck in potholes later to be upstaged by the person that caused all of this" and we're supposed to LAUGH at this atrocity? I say no. This is horrid. SpongeBob is being a total asshole to Squidward for NO REASON. I don't mind most Squid Torture episodes, but this one wes taking it way too far AND IT WASNT FUNNY. Most Squid Torture episodes can at least have a bit of humor to make it better. And the throat clearing gag. Don't get me started on possibly the worst "joke" in the history of the series. SpongeBob traps Squidward, making him get stung by jellyfish, and then says "Now that I have a captive audience...". That line pissed me off so much, I almost wanted to kill SpongeBob. Then he clears his throat for 18 hours to fill up the time of this episode since they have no idea what the hell to do with it and then MORE Squid Torture and then when Squidward finally gets his way, Little Yellow Book busts in and ruins his concert and then we're supposed to laugh. No. No. This episode is godawful and needs to be killed with fire.

Jjs: This was very close to making it on my list at one point, but I didn't hate it that much. Still a pretty meh episode though. It's just one gag over and over (FE GAH ROH FE GAH ROH) that wasn't funny the first time, and it drags into nonsense. This one is just a "meh" for me, it wasn't meh enough to make my Bottom 25, but I don't really mind seeing it here.

 

 

 

13. All That Glitters

 

 

124 points. 8 out of 23 lists. (#2 Wumbo)

 

During an intense day at work a customer orders a monster Krabby Patty and SpongeBob tries to make flip it. As a result, Spat is crushed and smashed and than SpongeBob starts crying like crazy. With his favorite kitchen implement out of commission, SpongeBob searches for a temporary replacement (even though he thought death fate spatula could replace Spat.) SpongeBob finds "Le Spatula," the latest in state-of-the-art cooking tool. The sleek and modern Le Spatula dazzles SpongeBob so completely that he will do anything to own one. But will this fancy gadget fill the void that was left by his old trusty spatula?

 

After selling everything, SpongeBob attains Le Spatula from the man from the store. He shows him off to Mr. Krabs, and, later, before he flips a patty, he refuses. He says it is disgusting, and that he and SpongeBob aren't friends at all. He then suddenly grows robotic legs and runs off. Mr. Krabs confronts SpongeBob, and SpongeBob runs off to the hospital, where old Spat lays. He suddenly runs out of life as SpongeBob watches, and SpongeBob cries in agony. Then a doctor appears, and, after some conversation, tells him that's not his spatula, and that Spat is in the infirmary. SpongeBob runs over to Spat, but Spat turns away from SpongeBob.

 

SpongeBob cries he's sorry for buying Le Spatula, claiming it was his moment of weakness. SpongeBob rolls in a fit of tears as he goes back to the Krusty Krab. He cries in the kitchen, but suddenly, he hears patties flipping, and sees Spat flipping Krabby Patties on the grill, and he cries in joy. Apparently, he forgave him. Suddenly, another Monster Krabby is ordered. The two try to hopefully succeed in flipping it. Suddenly, SpongeBob's arms break off. He ends up laughing, and the episode ends.

 

Clappy: This episode can bite me.  It made my list and nearly made my Top 10.  Everything about it just obnoxious.  Especially that never ending sequence of crying.  SpongeBob's crying is incredibly obnoxious in case you didn't catch on with my previous commentary over how much I hate that trait and this is nonstop crocodile tears over something so stupid.  Oh and just the whole Le Spatula sequence is irritating beyond belief.  Only redeeming factor are a few clever one liners that saved this from being Bottom 10 material for me.  Otherwise, all that glitters isn't gold sums this episode up beyond belief.

Rev: What? I thought this episode was called "Naked SpongeBob Cries For 11 Minutes". Seriously. There is SO. MUCH. CRYING. in this episode it makes it seem like SpongeBob has a mental disorder that causes him to cry every 3 seconds. So he breaks his spatula and then cries about it since he's a little puss, and there's more crying and yadda yadda yadda more crying jokes about fake doctors let's get on with the plot already. So SpongeBob sells everything INCLUDING HIS CLOTHES for a new spatula. Spoiler alert: HE STAYS NAKED THE ENTIRE EPISODE. I don't care if they don't draw his full body parts, I still get freaked out seeing naked characters. I mean maybe for a scene but longer than that it's just...not right. When he tries to use the spatula it somehow becomes sentient and rejects Krabby Patties since its a stuck-up snob and then runs away from SpongeBob because that whole scene was filler and then SpongeBob cries EVEN MORE and then the writers realize that this episode sucks and bring back his original spatula because we all want to get this garbage over with.

Jjs: This was on my list again, and surprisingly... it was a lot lower this time, only at #21 on my list. Maybe my hate for this one died off a bit. That being said though, this is still not a good episode. Don't think I really need to explain here-it's just SpongeBob crying over a spatula for 11 minutes, and he also gets naked (which I'm not really sure what the point of was). Honestly, how did this become a full-fledged episode? 

[Katniss]

Choir Boys was bad enough for me to make my top 5. SpongeBob is so annoying and unlikeable in this episode, more so than in Demolition Doofus. And that throat clearing gag, ugh.

 

All That Glitters should've made my list. It's so stupid. SpongeBob's excessive crying is never a good thing in an episode. 

[Metal Snake]

Choir Boys: Yeah, gotta agree with Clappy here. I dislike this one mostly because I just find it boring. I'll agree that Spongebob is kind of obnoxious in it as well though.

 

All That Glitters: ...Okay, I do realize that this one has a bit of "so stupid, it's amusing" appeal nowadays, but I still don't particularly like it.

[4EverGreen]

"Demolition Doofus" and "Clash of Triton"? Hate them, hate them with a passion! And MAJOR disrespect points to everyone who put "All that Glitters" so high up on the list!

[Wumbo]

 And MAJOR disrespect points to everyone who put "All that Glitters" so high up on the list!

I've never heard of anyone who actually liked this episode, so may I ask what is redeeming about it?

 

Here are my two cents since this is my #2 (and formerly #1) worst episode. Here's the main problem, in a nutshell.

 

It's annoying.

 

I want to punch this episode in the face. There's never a funny or clever moment, it's either SpongeBob crying, a spatula talking in a French accent (because French people are snooty how GROUNDBREAKING), or just... naked SpongeBob! He's naked! Get it?

 

I could probably yell for hours on end about how much this episode grates on me. I can't think of any reason to like this piece of trash. It's not funny, it's not endearing, and it's a totally pointless, obnoxious episode. WAAAA-HAAAAAA

[Guest]

Short reviews here since I don't have the time for long ones.

Little Yellow Book: I agree with Fluttershy here, this episode was at least decent. Don't really have anything to say here other than a decent little episode that I might watch if it's on TV.

Waiting: I was waiting for this episode to end. There is nothing to say about it. Just 8 minutes of pointlessness. One of the most eh episodes in existence.

Demolition Doofus: Oh god, I hate this one. It's almost traumatizing to see Mrs. Puff want to kill SpongeBob. I mean I get that SpongeBob was annoying and a jerk at the beginning, but that does not justify murder. This episode has left a scar on me. The sad part is, it had do much potential. I would've loved an episode just about SpongeBob at a demolition derby, as that part was entertaining. Cut the Mrs. Puff wanting to rid of SpongeBob plot and this episode would be great.

Clash of Triton: God, this episode was a waste of time. I'm never getting those 22 minutes of my life back.

[Clappy]

To make up for lost time:

 

 

12. Yours, Mine, and Mine

 

 

138 points. 9 out of 23 lists. (#2 Katniss)

 

Patrick orders a Krabby Kiddie meal at the Krusty Krab, but since he does not have any money, SpongeBob pays for it. He agrees to share it with SpongeBob, but does not save any of the meal for him. Patrick then wants his money back because his meal did not come with a toy, again despite the fact that SpongeBob paid for it, not him. Mr. Krabs sticks some straws and googly eyes on a Krabby Patty and calls it a Krabby Patty shaped toy, and SpongeBob falls in love with it and names it "Patty Pal."   Patrick then reminds SpongeBob that they are sharing this meal, ignoring that he ate it all himself, and takes Patty Pal.  It is the end of the day, and Patrick still will not let SpongeBob play with Patty Pal. They both go home, and SpongeBob declares that Patrick will be asleep and not get to play with Patty Pal, but Patrick dances with the Patty Pal all night.

 

SpongeBob wakes up and goes over to get the toy, but Patrick makes excuses not to come out. SpongeBob pretends to walk away, but fails to get Patrick to give him Patty Pal. Patrick whines and thinks it's not fair that SpongeBob wants the toy. SpongeBob tries to be diplomatic and suggests that they each get a day with it, but Patrick refuses. He asks him if he can keep it for a shorter time, but Patrick refuses again, and continues to refuse to SpongeBob's continually decreasing offers until SpongeBob finally takes the toy deciding that they trade off every second. However, even when they do that, Patrick still looks physically pained to part with the toy for even a second, so he takes the toy and runs away, which makes them begin to fight.

 

They run into Squidward's house and then Sandy's Treedome without helmets on. Sandy tries to help them, but they dry out and run out of her treedome gasping for water. When they feel better, they begin to fight again, and roll onto a bus, a subway, a taxi, and eventually back into the Krusty Krab. Patrick yells that if he cannot have it, then no one can and eats Patty Pal. SpongeBob and Patrick complain to Mr. Krabs, who stops their argument saying that they should be ashamed for letting a toy get in their way of friendship. After that, he lets them each have a toy, but they have to pay for it. Patrick says that he will pay, but he pulls out SpongeBob's wallet. SpongeBob tells him that it is his wallet, and Patrick asks him if he has learned nothing about sharing.

 

 

Clappy: So yeah, this is definitely the biggest surprise this late into the countdown (for me at least).  This was also the biggest riser in comparison from spots on 2013's countdown making it all the way from tied to 50 to being number 12 this go around.  Do I think it deserves it?  After recently rewatching this episode as well (surprise, some of these are so forgettable), I'm surprised I didn't have it higher on my own list.  I remember hating this the first time I watch it and it's gotten so much worse in recent viewings.  Patrick is an insufferable douche in this one.  The fact of the matter is this.  He deserved to suffer some sort of consequences for being an a**, yet it's like we are suppose to find it funny.  No.  It's degrading and an insult to our intelligence.  I really hate this and next time we revisit this countdown, it's going to have a much higher ranking on my personal worst list.

Katniss: Oh WOW, this episode. It bugged me so much. Patrick acted like such a little brat, though SpongeBob also had moments of immaturity. The ending to this episode sucks. This is a time where I feel Patrick needed to suffer some consequences and, I dunno, LEARN A LESSON. All in all, this is a dumb, unfunny slop of an episode in my eyes.

JCM: This episode didn't make my list, but that doesn't mean I didn't think it was pointless. SpongeBob and Patrick fighting over a toy is just a dumb idea, and unlike other episodes with dumb ideas that I tolerate, this didn't have a decent execution to make up for it. Also, I hate when SpongeBob and Patrick are reduced to acting like babies, because while their childlike personalities are part of their charm, they can quickly get annoying when it's taken too far, like it is here.

 

 

 

11. Someone's in the Kitchen With Sandy

 

 

141 points. 9 out of 23 lists. (#3 Fluttershy)

 

In the kitchen of the Krusty Krab, Plankton hides in one of the sesame seeds of a bun, attempting once again to steal the secret formula. SpongeBob takes the bun Plankton was hiding in, and made a Krabby Patty with it, which he delivers to Sandy. Sandy partly unzips her suit and slips the patty into it. Plankton jumps out of the sesame seed just before Sandy takes a bite. Then he faints because there is no water in Sandy's suit.

 

Later, Sandy returns to the Treedome. She goes into her bathroom, where she takes off her spacesuit and glass helmet (with unconscious Plankton inside). Then, she gets in the shower, turns it on, and literally rips off her fur pelt and bikini. Sandy is almost completely bald and pink, and is wearing a bra and panties in a shower. She picks up her fur coat, sniffs it, and hangs it on a hook. She resumes her shower, even though she is still wearing her bra and panties. Drops of water from the shower fall in her helmet, thereby reviving Plankton. Then Plankton notices Sandy's pelt, hanging on the hook. He takes the pelt, locks Sandy in her bathroom, and brings Sandy's pelt to the Chum Bucket. He motorizes the pelt and moves it to the Krusty Krab pretending to be Sandy. SpongeBob is happy to see "Sandy" again, but notices that "she's" not wearing her space suit and helmet. "Sandy" replies "I can breathe underwater now, simple as that." SpongeBob believes "her," of course. Plankton asks SpongeBob for Krabby Patty tips or information. After some short tips from SpongeBob, Mr. Krabs walks in through the door at the corner of the kitchen and sets the formula down on a table. Plankton cheers happily in Sandy's pelt, because stealing the formula is now much easier.

 

Meanwhile, Sandy finishes her shower. She wraps a towel around her body and walks over to dry her "stinky fur coat." However, her fur is gone. Finding herself locked in, she breaks down the door of the bathroom, fully aware that someone must have stolen it. She then flings the towel off herself, puts a coffee pot on her head in place of her helmet, and runs off to find the culprit, who's possibly wanting to sell her pelt on the Bikini Bottom black market. However, the Bikini Bottomites think she is naked, and make fun of her hairless pink skin, calling her a "hairless goat", a "nudist ferret," and a "naked chipmunk." Sandy makes a makeshift skirt out of seaweed to cover her "hind end," but it overheats, gets brittle and shatters when she warms her hairless body by a vent.

 

At the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob is giving Plankton an irritating lesson where he has to put the bun on the exact spot, but he's always off by a random amount like "3.6 millimeters." He gives up, steals the formula, and tries to escape. The real Sandy enters the Krusty Krab and stops him in the nick of time. She then rolls up her fur pelt and puts Plankton in a jar of mustard. Unfortunately, the law catches up with her. When they announce they will take the "sicko" away, Sandy thinks that they are trying to arrest Plankton for stealing a Krabby Patty Secret Formula, but the police arrest Sandy for public nudity instead. Sandy sighs in defeat and embarrassment.

 

Clappy: Hey Plankton.  You've unintentionally become my favorite character on the show post-movie.  I'll defend you now more so than ever.  But what the hell is this.  This (and most Plankton plots lately) is your dumbest scheme yet.  This is impossible to believe and is an insult to the viewer's intelligence that the writers actually thought that the could pass this off as a genius plot.  This may not be the worst episode on the countdown, but this is definitely one of the dumbest.  Stupid is too nice of a word for an episode like this.

Katniss: Why did season 7 have a bunch of "Plankton disguises himself in order to get the formula" plots? First of all, seeing Sandy's fursuit with empty eye holes is just creepy. Secondly, there's not really much about this episode that's interesting. Plankton as the Krabs robot in Imitation Krabs was great, meanwhile in this episode, he doesn't do much as "Sandy".  Finally, the issue of the townspeople, who I agree were acting like jerks to Sandy for no reason. Why did she have to get arrested in the end? This wasn't bad enough to make it past #21 on my list but I do consider it a boring, season 7 stinker.

JCM: This is an episode that did make my list, and for good reason. Plankton comes up with his most nonsensical plot yet, and it involves a character who isn't used effectively much being used as ineffectively as possible. That character, of course, is Sandy Cheeks, and while I want to give the episode credit for having her in a major role at all, I'd almost rather she not appear than be subjected to the kind of cruelty she endures in this episode, which of course is played for laughs and has no satisfactory resolution whatsoever. That's season seven SpongeBob for you.

[So Sejima]

Honestly both those eps I sorta at least think are decent, YM&M just showed Patrick being Patrick normally. :/

[Less_SpongeBob]

Choir Boys: While I really don't hate this as much as many other people do, I know where they're coming from, and I still hate it. Usually SpongeBob's torment of Squidward comes from what's at least assumed to be accidental or just stupid. Here, he's actively trying to abuse him and take away his dreams and he's aware that he's causing such harm. And he get's horribly stung by jellyfish, thrown into the air, frequently interrupted, and removed of his singing role, uh, just because he's happy SpongeBob's down? That's awful. Also, the main joke is either that or off-key singing.

 

All That Glitters: Speaking of actively doing stuff, this is the first episode I actively hated. It tries to be a soap-opera-y cryfest that comes out as highly repetitive and annoying. SpongeBob gets rid of all his money for a spatula, because, convinence. SpongeBob's naked for the entire thing for no apparent reason. And that spatula is one of the nastiest characters in the show. Easily got a spot in my top 20.

 

Yours, Mine and Mine: Yeah, pretty steep incline in placing. And it deserves it. Patrick is at one of his worst position in the show, period. Patrick is completely insufferable because his idea of "sharing" is using SpongeBob to pay for his stuff, and his hogging and unjustified anger and whininess really gets to me. And of course, it has the failed "Stuck in the Wringer" moral... again. Ugh.

 

Someone's in the Kitchen With Sandy: Oh boy, I really, really have a LOT to say about this one. Is it one of the worst episodes the show put out, and I'm surprised it doesn't get even more flack. But yeah, now to get to my reasons.

• It is really unoriginal. Besides stealing the main plot from a Season 2 episode, there are tons of others that do the exact same thing. I mean, Plankton disguises as Sandy to steal the formula. Then he does the same with his grandma, and then the same with Gary. Alongside that, it is done even more uncreatively, due to most of it's jokes being SpongeBob being oblivious to Plankton and doing the really boring "perfect the Krabby Patty" technique, which for a fast-food restaurant would be counter-intuitive. (And it's tedious, which isn't funny, jokes need variety) I mean, why doesn't he notice Sandy's freaking eyes and mouth missing? Noone else seems to get it either, they mindlessly assume she's normal. The other joke? Sandy being humiliated and outcasted because Plankton stole that fur.
• Sandy's fur pelt just walking around is really disturbing and awful. While they at least took the liberty of not using Sandy's original design, the pelt is still really ugly, unnaturally in motion, and feels like the insides of her rotted away.
• Sandy's torture is completely inhumane and unjustifiably mean-spirited. I can buy them not understanding the boo was a real diary in Little Yellow Book, but here they're literally wearing the exact same clothes or less than she is and fail to listen to the fact she's reporting a serious crime. Are we supposed to find the torture of the innocent funny? No, it's hypocritical and jarring. She's practically confined to running and hiding from the masses just so she'll be safe, as if the whole world is against her. And putting her in jail is just the tip of the iceburg (yet again, Plankton was more naked than her.
• And what's that torture linked to? RACISM AND DISCRIMINATION. Only alongside Squid Baby, this one's the only episode I find offensive. They are treating the victim with mass insults and punishment just because she looks out of place. Why should they care about what she is? She's widely considered the most intelligent being in the city, yet they consider her garbage without her apparent "fur" (which again, the removal of is disturbing). There's noone you root for, and the one you like is sentenced to prison because I shouldn't feel incredibly sorry for here.

Gosh, what is with this THING.

[Metal Snake]

Yours, Mine, and Mine: Watched some of this one, wanted to put my fist through the screen. Really Patrick...really? Were the writers just trying to see how detestable they could make him?

 

Someone's in the Kitchen with Sandy: Never liked this one at all. Dull as crud, so stupid it's bemusing.

[4EverGreen]

"Someone's in the Kitchen with Sandy" EASILY earned a spot on my list!!!!  Come ON, Plankton, you can do SO much better than THIS!!!!  And Sandy deserved SO much better as well!  To paraphrase Heath Ledger's the Joker in "The Dark Knight":

 

"Spongebob is naked all the time; nobody bats an eye, Sandy gets naked once, and everybody loses their freaking MIND!!!!"

[Joe Biden]

18. I placed this at #28 on my list. And yes, I hated it. The Squidward abuse is the least of my problems in this episode. Squidward's character was part of the problems of this episode, but it wasn't my main issue either. It was the Bikini Bottomites and their hypocrisy in this episode. Lemme explain. Earlier in the episode, the Bikini Bottomites and Squidward laugh at SpongeBob's secrets, but after SpongeBob starts crying and running away from the restaurant, the whole town turns on him and treat it like reading a diary is a crime. They even knew that it was SpongeBob's diary earlier and they never called him out for it!

 

Earlier:

"Reading somebody else's diary--that's terrible! Tell me more!"

 

Later:

"That was that little dude's diary?"

 

I think it would be fair if all Squidward, Patrick, and all the Bikini Bottomites got the punishment instead of just Squidward. They were all just as unlikable as Squidward was. Speaking of, I remember back on TV.com that this episode was so hated that they wanted to remove Squidward from the show.

 

17. My least favorite short of the series. SpongeBob was way too OOC in this episode over a toy. Flipping off his friends, crying over the toy breaking, and it wasn't funny at all. Just 7 minutes on unpleasantness. I'll wait for a better episode to come along.

 

16. Coincidentally, this made #16 on my list. I didn't hate this episode that much because of Mrs. Puff wanting to kill SpongeBob, but rather because of how oblivious SpongeBob acts in this episode.

 

15. Looks like we're going backwards since this was #17 on my list. It was a special that sounded like it had potential, but failed in execution. Triton was another one of those unlikable one-timer characters and it was really all a mess.

 

14. Okay, now we're really going backwards since this was #18 on my list. Dear God, was this episode so annoying. There were too many unfunny running gags in this episode like the "Figaro" gag which is half of the dialogue in this episode and the throat clearing gag. In fact, the episode just played out like a bad Wile E. Coyote short. I doubt I should even be comparing the Looney Tunes to this abomination.

 

13. I'm really really sorry about this, 4EverGreen. Don't kill me, but this was #4 on my list. I know I don't usually place annoying episodes this high on my list, but this was a special kind of annoying. It was Funny Pants annoying. A lot of this episode is SpongeBob crying and it really gets grating on the ears. SpongeBob getting naked wasn't really necessary for this episode, it just made the episode even worse. Overall, it was a very obnoxious episode and bored me to tears.

 

My opinions on 12 and 11 will come soon.