Jackie Chan

Hello there.

I have returned from a long voyage to inform you all I am officially passing my god status of SBC to @Danny DeVito. It has been an honor serving you all, but I am needed elsewhere. SBC will be fine without me. I will miss you all, but I shall try to drop in when I still can. Thank you all for understanding. May the ass kicking be with you.

I still exist!

i want a pony

i am a football playing king in space

Bobby?

They've been waiting patiently for Pinocchio to poke his nose 

Macklemore invented rap.

tony danza

NO I'M NOT FINISHED WITH THOSE ERRANDS AND I NEVER WILL BE

today marks the 10 year anniversary of another episode blessed by the gods: Choir Boys

today marks the 10 year anniversary of an episode blessed by the gods: Pet or Pests

i will catch the snipe

It is my honor to announce racism is indeed over, forever.

FUCK BIN LADEN

I just wanna hug your mama in her Subaru Hatchback

You know, if I were to die right now in some sort of fiery explosion due to the carelessness of a friend, well...that would just be okay.

If The Last Jedi is such a mind blowing film, then why didn't it have VR Wookie porn? Think about that.

I hope everyone enjoyed paying their respects to our lord Satan today.

Who wants to perform a satanic resurrection with me?

*throws shoe*

...LET'S just recap. You STEAL my motorcycle. I DON'T have you arrested. I'm forced to wait an hour... for BAGELS I didn't even WANT! (grabs the bag and shakes it) And then I come HOME to find you CHEWING on my sister's FACE!

I wish a joyful two year mod anniversary to my son @Chuck Mangione.

I am honored to see this song about me: 

Let it be known that President Bush is the best president of our lifetimes, and slander against him will NOT be tolerated in my household.