Clappy vs Billboard Hot 100

[Wumbo]

Well, you have songs that have off lyrics here and there, but Robin Thicke just has this creepy persona throughout his song. You can literally make a list of all the bad ideas the song has. I do think that the hate for Thicke is overblown, as his biggest crime appears to be writing bad music, but I can see why "Blurred Lines" is the whipping post for creepy songs.

[Fat Lenny]

We should all lay off Robin Thicke. I mean, come on, he faced addiction to alcohol and pills, wrote a song that was also halfway written by Pharrell, it gets criticised by one person and then the rest of the world jump on the bandwagon, calling it sexist, rape-apologetic and disgusting, he becomes almost a national hate figure and gets treated like he actually raped someone, his longtime partner breaks up with him after the Miley Cyrus incident, he tries to write an album to get her back, but she refuses, and the anti-Thicke bandwagon absolutely destroy the album, while it bombs sales-wise. Meanwhile, Pharrell Williams walks off scot-free, and everybody seems to love him, despite him being equally to blame for Blurred Lines. He may have made some bad decisions in his life, but he's a person like all of us, and just imagine how all of that hate would break someone down. I mean, why the hell do people feel the need to do this crap?

 

 

This is the sort of stuff you'd see if a dictator came into power or something. Not Robin Thicke singing a rather tasteless song.

[Wumbo]

Well see, people generally don't try to look at the big picture when expressing their hatred for something. Robin Thicke gets blasted because Robin Thicke, on the surface, had the most to do with the song. Research is hard, and if people see something or hear something that triggers a strong emotional response, well, the world we live in now is one where one can start a chain reaction of hatred without doing basic research.

 

Haha Jesus though, people are seriously protesting the song with marches and picket signs? Get over yourselves, people.

[President Squidward]

We should all lay off Robin Thicke. I mean, come on, he faced addiction to alcohol and pills, wrote a song that was also halfway written by Pharrell, it gets criticised by one person and then the rest of the world jump on the bandwagon, calling it sexist, rape-apologetic and disgusting, he becomes almost a national hate figure and gets treated like he actually raped someone, his longtime partner breaks up with him after the Miley Cyrus incident, he tries to write an album to get her back, but she refuses, and the anti-Thicke bandwagon absolutely destroy the album, while it bombs sales-wise. Meanwhile, Pharrell Williams walks off scot-free, and everybody seems to love him, despite him being equally to blame for Blurred Lines. He may have made some bad decisions in his life, but he's a person like all of us, and just imagine how all of that hate would break someone down. I mean, why the hell do people feel the need to do this crap?

 

 

This is the sort of stuff you'd see if a dictator came into power or something. Not Robin Thicke singing a rather tasteless song.

I hate it when people make a big deal of something that isn't actually happening in real life with the artist.

[Clappy]

Calling it boring, I'm fine with that, but I think the song being a grandiose of boring is a bit of a stretch. That, or I didn't know that boring can mean many different things, because generally I find a boring song when it sounds like this for example:

 

Spoiler

 

Or simply like this song that you reviewed several months ago:

 

Spoiler

 

Just saying, I was rather entertained when I first heard this song, believe it or not, enough though I realize know that this song doesn't have much of a meaning, now that I've read your review on this. It's probably because of the vocal talent of Jessie J and Ariana Grande alongside the beat that blares during the song that I find this entertaining.

 

My opinion is like this: it is flawed for mixing up the personalities of Jessie and Ariana, and for its lack of meaning, from what you said, but it sounds entertaining musically(?). Pretty much, I just don't understand its boring as much as you do.

Hey Brother I really don't find boring while Say Something is honestly forgettable more so than boring.  I didn't remember this song until you posted it.  Goes to show how much of an impact it has left in my memory banks.  It's just another adult contemporary ballad that gets popular because it has piano accompaniment.  I was way too harsh on Say Something.  It's boring, it just has no reason to get as popular as it did.  I've heard far worse this year though.  

 

Bang Bang is different to me in that it tries to come off as more powerful than it actually is with the horns blasting and Ariana and Jessie J oversinging about fighting for this guy.  Neither of them leave a lasting impression as to why they should take this guy home with them.  Both Jessie J and Ariana are entirely hollow and soulless as performers in this song.  Ariana actually does have personality, but she is not this sexy minx that she has been portraying most of this year.  To put it nicely, this song reminds me a lot of the first song I ever reviewed on this thread "Roar".  My initial thoughts on both songs (including my Roar review) were way too nice initially.  Roar was one of the most meaningless songs of 2013 and had no reason for existing.  Bang Bang is as meaningless of a diva power anthem as I've ever heard.  It's existence is meaningless and with all the horns blasting and divas oversinging, it's grandiose in that fashion.  The song just never ends and all three of these artists just don't fit in a song like this (except Nicki, but Nicki is not vicious enough and her talent is once again wasted).  So yeah, just a hollow and soulless song that has no reason for existing.

[Clappy]

Oh and as for the Robin Thicke/Jessie J discussion.

 

Blurred Lines doesn't deserve as much hate as it gets.  It's controversy and the reaction it gets is incredibly over-reactive.  My personal thoughts are that it's a stupid song that got too much radio play.  Everything bad about it is overblown and while Robin Thicke does come off as creepy on this, it's his Justin Timberlake carbon copy attempt that is even more offensive.  If you wanted to be Timberlake that badly, at least make more interesting music.  

 

I would like to see a Behind the Scenes video of what happened after this huge hit though someday.  Everything that happened to him afterwards is far more interesting than Blurred Lines controversy ever was.

[Wumbo]

Jessie J being the "good girl" and Ariana Grande being the "bad girl" are both such odd decisions to me that easily could have been fixed.

[Clappy]

^ The above statement aside, Wumbo has inspired me to dig deeper into yesteryear.

 

I'm going to do at Top 10 Best/Worst list as well.  However, this time I'm going to do one I've already covered.  My first Best/Worst list on this site was:

 

Spoiler

 

However, I have to admit that I assorted my lists based off a wide variety of criteria.  Aka if it was released in 2012, it counted on my countdown.  This time though, I want to do a more official list.  I want to go based off of what Billboard considers hit material.  Plus, my opinions on songs have changed over the course of two years.  What I may have considered Top 10 material back during my first list might not make it on there again this go around.  For my worst list though, I'm giving two songs a free pass.

 

-Birthday Cake because if I did a honest to god worst list of 2012, it would obviously still be placed at number one.  After all, it was #3 on my worst of all time list.

-Pound the Alarm because it's already made it on my Bottom 50 list.

 

So yeah, those two songs aside, I will start my countdown either tomorrow or next weekend depending on how much free time I get.

[Wumbo]

cake cake cake cake cake cake cake cake

[Burgerpants]

.

[Clappy]

So yeah, I have to be honest.  Out of the nearly two years I've been making any sort of commitment to music on this site, 2012 wasn't that bad.  Like the good stuff that came out this year, I found pretty good.  However, the bad stuff this year was pretty bad.  This was the year where Rihanna had 5 TOP 100 HITS.  Good god, I'm glad she has taken a break from music in 2014.

 

Honorable Mentions:

 

"We Found Love" - Rihanna (featuring Calvin Harris)

 

What an underwhelming massive pile of shit this was.  The lyrics are as minimal as they can get and Rihanna's voice was heavily autotuned to the point that you can barely tell it's her.  What kept it from my Bottom 10?  Calvin Harris's production is actually pretty hypnotic here.  It should have just been his production work period minus Rihanna and this song would be a lot better.  And yes, this song is obviously about Chris Brown.  Don't care how much she denies it.

 

"The One That Got Away/Part of Me" - Katy Perry

 

I'm counting both of these songs as one.  Katy Perry's break up songs killed whatever momentum she had with the 5 consecutive number one hits from Teenage Dream.  Both of these are just really fucking boring and I hate both of these so so much.

 

"The Motto" - Drake (featuring Lil Wayne)

 

YOLO.  YOLO.  YOLO.  That's the motto, that's the motto, that's the motto.  Drake is so boring when he brags about how rich and famous he is.  Oh and I am so glad that whole YOLO fad is falling out of relevancy.  

 

"Rack City" - Tyga

 

Hey would you look at that?  The song that made DJ Mustard the go to producer for boring synth brag rap tracks.  I will give this song some credit that I am mesmorized with how boring this is.  Like this is really fascinating that I can't put this on my Bottom 10.

 

"What Makes You Beautiful" - One Direction

 

One Direction sure knew how to make one hell of a bad impression out of the gate.  Thank goodness they are actually making semi-decent music now....yeah I said it.  Come at me.

 

"A Thousand Years" - Christina Perri

 

God Christina Perri is just terrible.  A thousand years was how long this song takes to get through every listen.

 

"Boyfriend" - Justin Bieber

 

Aww how cute.  He thinks he is Justin Timberlake now.

 

"One More Night" - Maroon 5

 

This is Maroon 5 at their most punchable.  Also this is when Maroon 5 just stop trying to make actual music.

 

"Starships" - Nicki Minaj

 

I loathe this song.  I honestly should have this on my Bottom 10, but I can't because instead of thinking about how shitty this is, now whenever I think about it, I think of one of my favorite movies from 2012:

 

 

Damn you Pitch Perfect for being such a good movie and making have a soft spot for a song I hate so much!

 

"Whistle" - Flo Rida

 

Gasp.  A song about whistling totally blows.  I don't hate this as much as others, but dammit if I don't find the whistling in this as irritatingly catchy.

 

Now that I got some honorable mentions out of the way, we are counting down

 

CLAPPY'S TOP 10 WORST HIT SONGS OF 2012...REDUX

 

 

10. "Diamonds" - Rihanna

 

Just like Roar in 2013 and Bang Bang in 2014, this is the most meaningless song I've heard from 2012.  It's grandiose in how boring this is.  If I hear Rihanna crone "shine bright like a diamond" one more time, I swear I would pull my ears out.  It's one thing to be boring, but I know you guys are wondering how is this bad?  The fact that Rihanna just wouldn't go away doesn't help matters either this year.  While Stay would go on to be the most unmotivating boring dreck Rihanna has ever done, Diamonds is a supremely close second.

 

 

9. "It Will Rain" - Bruno Mars

 

I like Bruno Mars.  He is very gifted and he is probably one of my favorite artists of this past decade.  That being said, this was awful.  I thought it would be impossible to out overdramatize himself in Grenade, but It Will Rain sure proved me wrong there.  I swear 2011-2012 Bruno desperately needed Xanax and this is Bruno at his most whiny.  Him pointing that there will be no positive vibes without the love of his life and that everyday it will rain until that happens.  Well Bruno, all I have to say about that is this:

 

 

 

8. "Somethin' 'Bout a Truck" - Kip Moore

 

I swear to god, country music is getting unbearably stupid.  And fast forward to the present where it's at it's most stupid.  But let's flashback to 2012 and this is where country music completely shocked me.  A love song about a truck.  Kip Moore may lead to how this is all about a girl, but it takes nearly halfway to even acknowledge that there is even a girl in this song.  75-80% of this song is about his love for his truck and ice cold beer.  Just what the actual fuck.

 

 

7. "Where Have You Been" - Rihanna

 

This might as well become Top 10 Reasons Why RIhanna Needs To Go Away.  Way to nearly ruin my favorite Johnny Cash song Rihanna with your blaring beats, your all over the place autotune, and just your putrid awfulness.  What was worse was that this song was nearly inescapable back in 2012.  I have no idea how many parties I went to where I heard "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LI-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-FE".  I don't want to know where you've been Rihanna, but wherever it was, I don't want to be anywhere near.  

 

 

6. "Let's Go" - Calvin Harris (featuring Ne-Yo)

 

You know.  For a song called Let's Go.  It never starts.  I think this was the song that finally broke the camels back for my appreciation of Calvin Harris's production work.  It's just boring as fuck and the production for this was not even that impressive to begin with.  Also, Ne-Yo should not be involved in partying songs.  Period.  A soulful R&B singer singing about how we should get out of our seats and dance?  I'd rather not.

 

 

5. "50 Ways to Say Goodbye" - Train

 

A lyrical travesty of almost epic proportions.  I have no idea what goes on in Pat Monahan (not jjs) mind when writing songs anymore, but good lord does the man need to realize if he can't come up with a good rhyme, just choose a different word.  But holy crap, out of the lame ways he said she died, nothing and I mean nothing, was more painful than reading this:

 

She'll think I'm Superman
Not super minivan
How could you leave on Yom Kippur?

 

...just WHAT!?  Ouch that rhyme scheme was so bad that my stomach just churned a little on the inside.

 

 

4. "Turn Me On" - David Guetta (featuring Nicki Minaj)

 

Now if you want to talk about a DJ taming an artist, look no further than this boringly bad trainwreck.  Nicki Minaj is reduced to nothing but a bland house diva while David Guetta blares his horribad beats all over the place.  I can't stand this wretched shitstain of a producer and Nicki Minaj once again lets me down.  Awful all around.

 

 

3. "You Da One" - Rihanna

 

Last Rihanna song, I swear.  Everything she did in 2012 once again was so fucking bad.  But nothing (except Birthday Cake) managed to be a bigger waste of time than this.  This is just so fucking boring.  I mean Rihanna sounds absolutely nothing like a woman in love and she does nothing to motivate anyone otherwise.  Her voice gets pitchy all over the place and there is this one production remix breakdown part that comes out of nowhere and makes my jaw drop in how "what the fuck" it gets.  It's probably the worst 15 seconds of music in 2012 to be honest.  Tune in to 2:30-2:45 to see for yourself.

 

 

 

2. "Want U Back" - Cher Lloyd

 

Just worthless.  Cher Lloyd is the worst pop artist to come across from the UK of the past 10 years.  Far worse than anything One Direction ever did since so many people complain about them.  This takes the worst elements of high school drama and just maximizes them unfathomable levels.  God everything about this is just painful.  Her constanting groaning, moaning, grunting, her voice....ugh I really hate this.  Someone ship this little Brit Brat back to where she came from.  Pronto.  Btw everything I just said about Rihanna's worst 15 seconds of 2012 hit music, allow me to present to you the worst 4 seconds.

 

 

...just what?

 

Now what can be worse than that?  Well how about a "train" wreck of massive proportions that probably should have earned a spot on my Bottom 50 Songs Ever list.

 

1. "Drive By" - Train

 

 

I hate to steal Todd in the Shadow's thoughts, but he just sums up how awful this song is perfectly.  Like this is just excrutiating pop music.  Pat Monahan's brain should be studied.  I have no idea how it functions and where he pulls these lyrics out from.  I mean he is comparing this one night stand and how much he loves her to garbage.  Can I have a hefty bag to vomit in?  Also a Drive By?  Does he have any idea what the actual fuck a "drive by" even is?  Either way you do me?  Dude I don't want to picture your "OH face".  God this is just unbearably bad and is probably the second worst song on that Billboard Hot 100 of 2012 because it still doesn't come close to being as bad as....

 

 

Yep, 2012.  The year where my hatred of Rihanna reached extremely high levels.

[101 Dalmatian Street]

Time for my thoughts:

 

We Found Love: I'd switch "Let's Go" with this if I were you, but WFL is just an example of a myriad of airplay killing it for me.

10. Eh it was alright.

9. Couldn't agree more.

8. Never really heard it.

7. Never liked this song.

6. I think this is where I think you're overstating this. The reasons why I would accept this Calvin Harris song is because I find it fun to listen to, so I don't completely know where you're getting at here. To me, it's what electronic dance music feels like and sounds like. It has lyrics, and I could care less about them...and that's fine for me. As long as they don't ruin the song for me, I can still enjoy the song. IMO, It's kinda like I don't have to care about the lyrics. As for one of Harris' other songs, don't be surprised that "Feel So Close's" repetition compared to "Let's Go" does not work for me at all. Yet again, it's your list and your scale of boringness.

5. Guilty pleasure.

4. I've always found the chorus annoying.

3. Heh, you sure don't like Rihanna. I think this song's okay though.

2. I can't make out whether or not Cher Lloyd is awful or just a little bit underrated. I can definitely say that "Swagger Jagger" is a mess. I never liked "Want U Back," but I'll be more honest that this song is not that horrible. I tried to hear "Oath" in full, but I got out of the mood, while her guest appearance in "Really Don't Care" is the only thing I tolerate from her so far.

1. Garbage, just like how Monahan compares the girl to.

[Clappy]

Appreciate your feedback Steel but:

 

 

6. I think this is where I think you're overstating this. The reasons why I would accept this Calvin Harris song is because I find it fun to listen to, so I don't completely know where you're getting at here. To me, it's what electronic dance music feels like and sounds like. It has lyrics, and I could care less about them...and that's fine for me. As long as they don't ruin the song for me, I can still enjoy the song. IMO, It's kinda like I don't have to care about the lyrics. As for one of Harris' other songs, don't be surprised that "Feel So Close's" repetition compared to "Let's Go" does not work for me at all. Yet again, it's your list and your scale of boringness.

 

This is where you and I differ.  What you find fun in this song, I find hideously boring.  It does have lyrics.  Horribly vague repetitive lyrics.  What was different between Feel So Close and Let's Go is that Feel So Close actually had really good production work that I could find myself getting up to dance to.  Let's Go doesn't make me want to go to the club and dance for example.  It makes me want to get out of the club.  It's production is awfully boring.  And Ne-Yo doesn't make it any better either.  He just states let's make it happen/let's go/overused cliches and doesn't add any sort of value to the song whatsoever.

[Wumbo]

Good picks, Clappy. I think "Drive By"'s just too harmlessly stupid to be my #1 pick (well... #2 next to... that one song). But I did happen to hear a Train song that I think is one of the worst-level bad, off of the same album. Never became a charting hit, thank God.

 

[Clappy]

Good picks, Clappy. I think "Drive By"'s just too harmlessly stupid to be my #1 pick (well... #2 next to... that one song). But I did happen to hear a Train song that I think is one of the worst-level bad, off of the same album. Never became a charting hit, thank God.

 

Jjs had me listen to this on the XAT earlier today.  This is hilariously bad tbh, although the lyric choices are aggravating once again.  Pat Monahan is an evil genius in terms of piss poor lyrics.

[Wumbo]

God, the disrespect it shows to the dead, though... the blissfully, annoyingly unaware disrespect... Whitney Houston died TWO MONTHS BEFORE THE ALBUM, man.

[101 Dalmatian Street]

Appreciate your feedback Steel but:

 

 

This is where you and I differ.  What you find fun in this song, I find hideously boring.  It does have lyrics.  Horribly vague repetitive lyrics.  What was different between Feel So Close and Let's Go is that Feel So Close actually had really good production work that I could find myself getting up to dance to.  Let's Go doesn't make me want to go to the club and dance for example.  It makes me want to get out of the club.  It's production is awfully boring.  And Ne-Yo doesn't make it any better either.  He just states let's make it happen/let's go/overused cliches and doesn't add any sort of value to the song whatsoever.

 

Now I can see where you're getting at. "Let's Go" is still a guilty pleasure for me though and I'm hoping to see your Best list further on.

[Shark Tale]

God, the disrespect it shows to the dead, though... the blissfully, annoyingly unaware disrespect... Whitney Houston died TWO MONTHS BEFORE THE ALBUM, man.

 

But Mr. Artie No-Pants, this song has such such genius lyrics from my brain:

 

DON'T CRY WHEN I DIE (please don't  )

 

SHOULD HAVE SPENT LESS TIME MAKING LOOT, AND SPENT MORE TIME IN MY BIRTHDAY SUIT WITH YOU

 

EVEN BIEBER AIN'T FOREVER

[Doctor Sex]

"The song Wiggle is not a bad song. It is good and sure when he kepps saying Wiggle. And sure the quote "You know what to do with that big fat butt" may anger people but I like it.

Yet people love the song Bang Bang which I dislike. But Bang Bang is a song on a preview for a dance game."

[Burgerpants]

Take Care's gonna be on the Best list or at least the honorable mentions isnt it