Ask the Great Aya anything

[Cha]

i think that’s everyone

actually hasegawa and kondo are more bicurious if anything 

[Aya♥]

17 minutes ago, Cha said:

i think that’s everyone

Very true to all these.  I love my little gay tbcs

[Cha]

hata when his bros and jii don’t acknowledge him for five minutes?

 

[Aya♥]

1 hour ago, Cha said:

hata when his bros and jii don’t acknowledge him for five minutes?

 

such a needy little child, but I understand

[Cha]

fav album so far this year?

[Old Man Jenkins]

Takeover and Summerfest predictions?

[Aya♥]

4 hours ago, Old Man Jenkins said:

Takeover and Summerfest predictions?

NA Title Match baby (what I'm looking forward to most this weekend) between The Velveteen Clarke, Stronk, and Peter Dunne.  Really excited, I expect Roddy to win.

Mommy Io vs Mrs. Hotdog Legs,  I expect IO to bury Candice, simple as that.

The Raw Profits vs Fishyboys for the Tag Titles,  I got Fish and O'Riley winning this one.

MMA Bayley vs M.I.A for the Women's title.  I got Shayna retaining on this one.

Turkey Legs taking on Mashed Potato Cole in a three stages of heck match.  I got Adam retaining here, UE draped in gold baby.

 

Drewby defending the Baby Man title against ONEY FUCKING LORCAN,  I got Oney winning the title, it's only right

Gillberg taking on Nerd Ziggler.  Goldberg is going to shoot brainbuster and kill Dolph.

Momma Stratus takes on The GOAT,   I got Charlotte winning here, only makes sense.

The Momma Stealer vs Mr. Sound Effects.  I have AJ retaining by dubious means.

Finnious Balor vs. The Friend.  It has to be Bray, no exception.

Steen vs The Best in the WORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.  Honestly, the Aya upset pick of the night, I got Shane winning.

Non MMA Bayley vs. Ember of the Sharingan.  I got Ember winning the title here, another upset pick I think.

Beckly vs Nattie, should be good,  I got Becky retaining.

Randall Keith Orton taking on Kofert for the WWE Title, I got Kofi retaining, no reason to put the title back on Orton.

Bork Laser taking on The Internet's Biggest Loser for the Universal Title.  Brock has to win, no exceptions.

[Old Man Jenkins]

Who do you see dethroning Brock for the title?

[Aya♥]

2 minutes ago, Old Man Jenkins said:

Who do you see dethroning Brock for the title?

tough, not really sure really.  The easy answer is Roman, but I could see them going with someone else like AJ if they really want to push The Club to the moon

[Old Man Jenkins]

I'd hope they're ballsy enough to do a Brock/OC feud. My personal choice would be Samoa Joe, especially if they decide to actually push him as more of a babyface/tweener following this week's Raw. Build him up to be like the Vegeta to Roman's Goku sorta, both being from a proud warrior race and all dat?

[Aya♥]

20 hours ago, Old Man Jenkins said:

I'd hope they're ballsy enough to do a Brock/OC feud. My personal choice would be Samoa Joe, especially if they decide to actually push him as more of a babyface/tweener following this week's Raw. Build him up to be like the Vegeta to Roman's Goku sorta, both being from a proud warrior race and all dat?

I would love to see Joe succeed in any timeline also

[Cha]

u ever become a lesbian furry with just one or two photos

[Aya♥]

On 8/13/2019 at 4:32 PM, Cha said:

u ever become a lesbian furry with just one or two photos

yes

[Cha]

i reckon i truly love all types of royal families

 

 

[Aya♥]

On 8/20/2019 at 6:05 PM, Cha said:

i reckon i truly love all types of royal families

 

 

my favorite gay cousin

[Cha]

 

 

[Aya♥]

"Hey Big Guy, where are we going?  You've been dragging use around these woods all morning.  Are you trying to find the new TBC chapter?  I wouldn't be searching too hard if that was the case."  Sougo was munching on a kebab he had brought along with him on this "Top Secret Super Excellent Mission" that Gonard had prepared for the Shinsengumi.

"We're almost there guys, see look!"  Gonard pushed past a large shrubbery and revealed something so bizarrely idiotic that Toshi dropped his kebab in shocked stupidity.

 

"We're going on a roadtrip!"  Gonard yelled.  Yamazaki's face went completely pale as he saw the letters E and F in conjunction with each other.

"Oh so we're just rehashing ideas now huh author?  Couldn't come up with anything new?"  Sougo said mockling at me.  The Shinsengumi consisting of Kondou, Toshi, Sougo, Yamazaki, Gonard, Joe, Steve, and Saitou walked up to the three standing at the police van.

"Vandalizing a police vehicle..."  Toshi said scratching his head.

"No worries Green Man! the Princess did it!"  Gonard said patting him on the back.  Toshi walked over to pick his kebab up to drop it again.

"Wh...why is the princess hanging out with those two Amanto Princes?  Where's Pops at?"  Koundo asked worryingly.

"Don't worry Gorilla!  Hata is like, one of my bffs too.  Kagura couldn't make cause she said she "Isn't paid enough to be in a B story"!"  Soyo said, fist bumping Hata.  Barkus sighed, knowing this was going to be a long road trip.

"P-p-please don't tell me we aren't going to see Exploding Feminism..."  Yamazaki said, shivering.

"Of course!  We have to meet Bansai, we got VIP tickets!"  Hata said, holding up exactly enough tickets for everyone.

"Well I don't mind a break from all this detective work, eh Joe!"  Steve said, playfully elbowing his brother.  Joe smiled and nodded.

"Why does it say NYPD on the side of the truck?"  Sougo said.  He shrugged as he and Saitou climbed into the van and snag the most comfortable seats for sleeping.

"This is gonna be great guys, come on!"  Gonard hurried everyone on the bus.

"I guess I'll drive."  Barkus said, starting up the massive police vehicle.

"Think about this, we turn our blinkers on and run every red light on the way there!"  Hata said, excited.  Soyo jumped up and agree.

"NO WE ARE NOT!"  Toshi yelled back as he sat in the passenger seat.  Hata and Soyo were sitting across from Kondou and Sougo.  Sougo stared across at Hata with unease, rubbing his neck.

"Didn't think we'd see each other again so soon."  Sougo said awkwardly.  Hata brushed it off and returned to gossip with Soyo.  Kondou put his hand on Sougo.

"Sougo my boy, it's ok to not understand love.  My burning passion for Otae and Fake Otae are immense and it burns my heart.  I'm sure you feel the same."  Sougo stuck his kebab stick in Kondou's hand and stood up.  He put his facemask on and slouched down next to Saitou who was already asleep.  Joe and Steve sat in the back of the van with Yamazaki and Gonard.  There was a couple of TV's set up and a Wamestation that Zaki and Gonard were hogging up.

"This will keep my mind at ease before the big disaster."  Yamazaki said, as video game sounds played in the background.

"I'm not sure why you're so scared to see Exploding Feminism, I hear they're excellent live!"   Steve said, a little excited since he was a fan of their work.  Yamazaki put his controller down and turned to Steven with a horrified look.

"That man is a criminal.  I know what he does to me...I just haven't caught him yet.  I guarantee he has an entire altar in my name."  Yamazaki turned back around and continued gaming.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"He's totally thinking about me KyuKyu, I just know it."  Bansai was sitting in his dressing room with Kyuubei and the rest of EF.  Their show starts in 3 days, perhaps their biggest venue yet.

"Well, I'm sure he is, and I'm sure Otae-san is thinking about me too.  You just gotta believe!"  Kyuubei slapped him on the back, causing his glasses to fall to the floor out of sheer force.

"Be careful, we need him later."  Elizabeth signed, flipping the drumsticks in their flippers.

"Senpai, that Yammy Wammy whatever guy is not thinking about you.  Just get over it and focus on the gig!"  Matako said with a hint of anger.

"I agree Bansai-dono, don't fuss with our manger, she's a busy woman."  Takechi said, nodding to Kyuubei.  Kyuubei had been labeled as EF's new manager going forward after the events of Valentine's Day.  She didn't really know what to do, but she's happy to help her friend and his band.

"Yes, I've got to consult with Otae about money handling at the moment.  I mean, we're playing in the largest stadium in the country, the Mega Ultra Dome, about 60 miles outside the capital.  It's pretty much its own city at this point."  Kyuubei got on the phone and walked out of the dressing room.  Bansai sighed,

"It's not like me to be nervous, but I got a feeling that I need to play my heart out in a few days."  Bansai stared at his guitar, the word "Yammy" etched into the side of it.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I've heard, all those love ballads are about ME!"  Yamazaki said, throwing the controller,  Hata and Soyo butted in,

"Uhm, no, they're about me."  they both said simultaneously.

 "Alright you hooligans, we're making a pit stop."  Barkas parked the van outside a rest area.

"What, old man gotta rest?"  Hata said to his brother.  Barkas turned around and glared at him while turning off the van.  "I need to get this thing fueled up, since no one bothered to before we left."

"We never use this thing anyway, it just sits in the back of our headquarters."  Toshi said, shrugging.  Toshi and Barkas got out to fill the gas tank, but as they put the nozzle into the tank, it busted off and gas started pouring everywhere.  Toshi looked down, having a lit cigarette in his mouth.  He looked back up at a non-existent camera like in The Office.

  The cigarette fell from his mouth and caught the gas trail on fire, setting him, Barkas, and the van on fire.

'"ONII-SANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!"  Hata screamed as Barkas ran screaming into the rest area's convenience store.

"TOSHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII"  Kondou yelled as he and the rest of the Shinsengumi tried to put the Vice Chief out.  Soguo carrying a gas canister in his wake.

"THE EF MOBILEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"  Soyo yelled as she fell to her knees in horror as the police van caught on fire.  Gonard joined her as the two sobbed on the ground.

"Why don't we just try and put the fire out of the can instead of crying here...wait...SAITOU-SAN IS STILL ASLEEP IN THE VAN!"  Joe yelled as he peered into the van, but he was grabbed from behind.

  "Don't worry Joe-sama.  That's just my body double."  Saitou handed a card that said this to Joe.  Joe looked back at his body double, which was now melted away,

"Wh...was that a real human being?"  Saitou turned away and walked into the convenience store for a bottle of Arnold Palmer.  The three stood there as their van burned to rubble.  A couple of fire men came rushing, put out the fire, then left.



"I loved that van..."  Gonard said, putting his head down.  He looked over as Sougo had his head shoved into the gas canister, while Steve was pouring water on Toshi, who was burned to a crisp cartoonishly.

"Someone go into that store...buy me as much mayo as you possibly can."  Toshi said, and Kondou rushed in there.  He saw Hata shoving Barkus into the freezer to try and put the fire out, which kind of worked, but just burned Barkas more before finally the flames died down.  Eventually the whole gang met up at the burnt van.  They all were shaking their heads, some crying.  However, Gonard was not detoured.

"Look guys, how about we just take that van under that bridge over there!"  Gonard pointed,

 

"We gotta make that concert one way or another!"  Gonard yelled pushing them towards the bum van.

"This is stupid, why is the only time we get screentime is on some stupid adventure to a concert that I don't even want to attend."  Sougo said, putting his sleeping mask back on.

"ROADTRIP 2.5!"  Soyo and Hata yelled as the hopped in.

TBC

[Old Man Jenkins]

Probably a lil late to ask but who do you see being buried with winning the king gimmick?

[Aya♥]

On 8/27/2019 at 2:10 AM, Old Man Jenkins said:

Probably a lil late to ask but who do you see being buried with winning the king gimmick?

I want Corbin to win it, but I think Ricochet will win

[Cha]

“Hnnng, we got to the concert! We made it everyone! I’m so proud to everyone out there!

 

Joe was slapped out of his sleep by Oboro. “H-huh?! Where’s the Mega Ultra Dome?!” 

“Dude..” Oboro looked at him and Poe just crossed his wings. 

“Oops.” Joe dusted himself off and got up against the alley wall he had doze off on. The two cautiously walked about.

It had been four months since previous events of the Tendoshu completely taking over Edo and a large sum of the galaxy, causing citizens to hide out or simply leave Earth all together, although space travel was impossible with all the eyes of their overlords. The universe’s two most wanted men had came across each other one night as Oboro had left an unknown noodle shop and they’ve been tagging along each other since then for better or worse. Everyone they knew was unable to be found, much to their dismays. The two spent their days now trying to get local sources about the happenings of their overlords and any word of their friends. 

“Heads up.” Joe tossed out bag of stale chips from the garage can and Oboro caught it. The two were walking through the backsides of the apocalyptic dump once known as Edo. The skies these days always seemed to be a depressing burnt grey color from the overwhelming dirty smog but the two kept trotting on.

“Here you can have the rest. Half eaten bagels from the dumpster are much better these days.” Oboro joked and tossed it back to the man but he dropped it with his metal arm.

“Well la-dee-da-da.” Joe snarked. He picked it up with his real hand instead. “And you know my cyborg arm rusted a month ago yet you chose to throw it at it anyway, old man.“

”Old man?” He looked at Poe who had the same confused reaction as him, naturally. “Poe, now I think Joseph is fibbing, I don’t look a day over 30.”

”Yeah yeah yeah, old timer. I bet you were giving many ‘Joseph’s that same automated reply in another universe.” Joe downed the rest of the bag of potato chips and tossed it on the floor. 

“Anyway, so while you were you were snoozing Joseph, I managed from a very trustworthy source-“ Oboro started as the two with their bird continued walking.

“Oh don’t tell me the homeless man with the fourth foot again.” Joe shook his head and stepped over a person in a dirty sleeping bag. 

“He has a fourth foot now? ...Well no. It wasn’t him. But they did tell me the location of..” Oboro leaned in all serious and whispered. “Fresh oil.”

“No way, old man.” Joe exclaimed in disbelief holding onto is bad arm.

“Yes way, in fact they told me without me having to blackmarket my organs... again.” Oboro and Poe nodded.

“Get out!” Joe exclaimed.

“I’m serious I-“ 

“No, I mean GET OUT!”

Joe pushed Oboro aside as he was nearly impaled with several poisonous raining from the alley roofs. 

The two of them ran for it like hell, Joe using a trash can lid he picked up from the street and Oboro grabbing those same needles and flinging them back up in the sky with same Naraku tricks he already knew inside and out.

“Damn Naraku bastards, that’s the 5th time this week we’ve had to change locations.” Oboro huffed as Poe clinged onto his back. 

“Soon all we’ll have to hide in is the Winstein’s Bros dumpster with your favorite soggy bagels.” Joe smirked as did Oboro. They kept dodging corners and changing alleyways. 

“CAW!” Poe pointed and cawed to a manhole.  They escaped down inside of it, covering their tracks as they did.

“Guess the only place left was underground.” Joe let go of the final ladder step and stomped on the swampy sewage terrain. 

“Ugh, Poe and I haven’t smelled this much sewage since universe 5.” Oboro and Poe plugged their noses.

“You know I’m almost sure now that you and that bird make some of these multiple universe stories up, old man.” Joe joked and looked down at his rusted arm in the pitch dark. “Damn, if I could only wish up a light for us right now to see where the hell we’re going.”

The two walked for a while through the infected waters until Joe spoke out again.

 “You know... now that I think of it. Earlier back there, I dreamed I was back again with Steve.. and don’t mean to be corny ‘n stuff but it felt so real..” Joe sighed and Oboro and Poe put their hand and claw on his shoulder in support. 

“Wait.. I hear something.” Oboro said and they all stayed quiet. “It’s coming from here!” He ran to a dim light in the distance, Joe following behind.
————-
Meanwhile somewhere drifting in space, the Jouishishi/Kiheitai terrorist ship had been on its way for the last four months to locate their missing friends. Gintoki, Shinpachi and Sadaharu had come along too, in hopes of having their own family reunited again with Kagura. A few weeks ago they managed to come into contact with Mutsu’s ship, thus giving them another helping hand. The galaxy was amongst intergalatic war, so it took them longer to navigate and detour through the rough terrain. Their only sources of information about their friends being heresay from random Amantos at pitshops.

One of the terrorists nudged his head through the ball room door. It was the best place on the ship to get the best views and for a certain couple, to slow dance in the darkness of space. Shinsuke at that point hadn’t spoke to or seen anyone in seven weeks, he had remained in that particular room. 

“Hey midget, are we gonna have to carry your dead weight through all the cosmos before you decide to come out?” The individual asked. There was a long silence.

“It’s funny, I‘ve never heard this voice before and somehow still I know who it is purely on the insults alone.” Shinsuke finally replied, his back still turned to them. “Aren’t ducks suppose to go quack though?”

 

“Won’t I have something to explain to my best friend when we finally rescue him why his dead brain husband died from starving himself for no reason?” Elizabeth asked.

Several seconds passed of more silence.

“You know shorty, I’ve always really despised you since Benizakura. The so many nights after that event that you made Katsura cry from losing his you, his first best friend and really just your dick personality in general. But you know what? Despite all of that, knowing how much Katsura needs you kind of changes my own perspectives..” He looked down at his flippers. “-even if I still think you’re the worst thing Earth has ever produced. But I’ll leave now as you wish, Captain. I’m not that big on talking anyway.” Elizabeth closed the door behind Shinsuke. He covered his face and antenna inside his beak again and joined the others in the living room.

“Any word from him, Lizzy?” A concerned Matako looked up at the duck.

-Nothing important.- He signed and Matako sorrowfully exhaled. Bansai peered up from playing his shamisen in a chair.

“I hope you didn’t sign anything to him that will just make him clam up more.” Bansai said in a serious tone.

-I didn’t sign anything to him, Bansai.- The other three bandmates looked at each other confused.

“I don’t know what you all expected from him at this point.” Gintoki sat on the sofa next to Shinpachi and Sadaharu.

”Gin-san..” Shinpachi looked at the floor. “It’s not just Takasugi-san, we’ve all lost people we care about.” Gintoki close his eyes at hearing that part.

”Kagura is just off teaching her idiot big brother and their idiot father a lesson. It’s just taking longer than expected.” Even Gintoki’s bullshit words weren’t fooling himself this time.

“Arf..” A depressed Sadaharu got up from the floor and put his body on Shinpachi’s lap and put his head down in Gintoki’s.

“We might have lost people for now, but we’ll all be damned if we forget about them even for a second.” Mutsu then looked over her shoulder. “All of them...”

———-

“So how will these tanks or whatever tell if these pards are Altana beings?” Nobunobu asked one of the Tendoshu members.

”Patience, our Shogun. The Altana sample Kamui attained for his Harusame elders and his blood and DNA samples shall soon enough give us a result for all three.” The individual looked at a Harusame leader and he nodded his head.

“Well someone’s an eager beaver, Shog! What, can’t take the sight of me, your old buddy who you nearly had his head shot off?” The Nameless Man smiled at Nobunobu but he just looked away.

”I just came along to see how things were doin’ in progress of my Shogunship comin’ into line. Our partnership as far as I’m concern is over, pardner. Remember that in your very limited thoughts.” Nobunobu walked away from the group huddled around the tanks.

”Okay, pardner.” Nameless amusingly replied and caught up to him. “Say, what is this planet named that we finally arrived on after all these weeks? And why are we here again?”

”I said don’t talk to me.” Nobunobu looked ahead but then sighed after several long quiet seconds. “Koukan. There’s an abundance of altana all over here, supposedly. And them Tendoshu want to harvest it.”

”Ha, I knew all of that, I just wanted to hear you say it, cowboy!” Nameless smiled as Nobu made an irritated noise. “But man, talk about a barren wasteland! Amirite?” The Nameless Man asked but Nobunobu kept looking ahead still. “Well I’m gonna wonder around, I’m hosting a big event soon!” Nobu paused walking from this.

“Event?” He asked.

”See it as the Tendoshu’s little present for me for all the hard work I did for capturing a buncha hoolgians, “””pardner”””.” Nameless winked and then ran in another direction.

”Idiot.” Nobu kept strolling down the Tendoshuu ship’s hallways until finally stumbling upon what he was looking for.

”Oh how the mighty have fallen.” Nobunobu stared at prison cell’s occupant who arms were in shackles up against the wall. 

“Hello little cousin.” 

”That’s Shogun to you, peasant.” Nobunobu squinted his eyes at the feeble man. 

“So what brings you by to finally visit me after all these weeks, Nobu?” Shige kept his smile which annoyed Nobu even further.

”Maybe it’s just satisfyin’ to see you like this. Powerless, humiliated, a mure ghost of what you were. Just reminds me how close I am to becomin’ the Shogun now. All we need is to kill off the rebels.” Nobunobu’s expression then went from blankness to scowling. “And wipin’ that grin off your face will be my first task, let me tell you that.”

”You’re blinder than I thought if you keep believing these people will keep their word on making you the Shogun and not betray you, Nobu. They’re like you, they want power and will stomp on anyone by any means to attain it, even their Shogun. I mean they did it once already didn’t they?” Shige replied. Nobu swiftly turned his back and clenched his fists.

“I’ve been promised the crown and betrayed before, I think I know that by now.” Nobu simply replied and thought back in his memories.

  

“But this time, I will have those words put into action, by my own hands.” He looked ahead.

”You can strike fear as much as you want on our country, our world, even the galaxy. But just remember, little cousin. The power of a leader is as strong as the ones who choose to not fight for him, but fight with at his side in battle. Samurai I believe are truly the strongest of these creatures, you’d be wrong to cross them.” Shige winced a little in pain from the strain on his upper body. 

“I’ll let y’all know soon how I want you executed. And if you get lonely in the meantime, there’s a baldin’ father of those suppose Altana kids in the other cell y’all can conversate with.” Nobunobu walked away, determined as ever to fulfill domination dreams. 

Meanwhile, on the other side of the ship a group of other imprisoned individuals grew restless.

”Wish we knew where we were out now.” Skele sighed. “Seems like every week we’re flown somewhere new and they won’t tell us.”

The rest of the guys were in low spirits too. They’ve tried countless of ways to try to escape but all of them flopped.

”Probably better in here than outside anywhere else in the galaxy right now.” Tatsuma leaned against the wall.

”I don’t know how you can say that, Sakamoto. How undignified it is to us, us as samurai, to have our wings clipped as countless people are being slaughtered and we can’t even join our brothers and comrades in the fight. I rather die in battle as a man to be selfishly given the right to live in comfort.” Zura scowled at the ground as he had pushed up his knees to his chest. 

“Well the way I look at it Zura, there’s not a thing we can do! So why focus on what we can’t do?” Tatsuma smiled. “And what are you calling comfort? There’s barely enough place in here for our toilet!” At least his optimism as always helped ease the four’s moods.

“Oh god.. Pakuyasa’s stomach isn’t agreeing with him again from that contest he won!” Pakuyasa rushed his ass on the toilet seat, the other three looking away. 

“Get up, Joui scum.” The guard that had been watching their cell for the last few months jiggled his key into the lock, opened it and immediately put them one by one into cuffs. “Your time has arrived.”

”One more second!” Pakuyasa exclaimed from the toilet his ass was still purged on.

Katsura, Tatsuma and Skele looked at the man’s face for the first time without their cell bars in the way. 

“Y-you’re.. a skeleton too?!” Skele’s boney mouth dropped. 

“One more minute, PLEASE!” Pakuwhomstya pleaded out.

”Yeah so what?” The guard crossed his stick arms.

“It’s just.. I haven’t seen my own kind since the Skeleton War..” Skele made a little troublesome smile.

“Well war does all kinds of shit to us, kid. Takes us places we never thought we’d be. Move along.” The guard jabbed the three to move forward. It was hard for them in their weakened state in a cell all those weeks with barely any food to try to ambush the guard so they followed his orders. The three and the guard walked for probably half an hour before he had them stop.

“Takasugi and Bonestein. You two are first.” The guard pointed to them and begun opening a door.

”Huh?” They both asked but the skeleton pushed them outside.

”Hey just a minute, those are my friends!-“ Tatsuma protested but it was too late, the steel door was sealed shut behind Katsura and Skele. They turned around to release they were out in the open doors in the hot desert of Koukan. 

“In this corner we have two Joui rebels about to embark on the most painful yet interesting experience of their lives!”

From a distance on top of the Tendoshu ship, a man with an oxygen suit and protected in a force field had a microphone. Skele and Katsura couldn’t make out who it was, but they had worse things to think about. On the other side of the ship straight across from the duo, another door opened and a large crowd of men entered out of it. 

“Folks, what’s the absolute worst thing two hotshots who think they’re better than anyone else can face?” The Nameless Man asked a crowd of no one. “ALL the people they’ve stepped on!” 

“Zura.. you don’t think those are some of the people we were in the war with, right?” Skele tried to look in the distance. 

“They must have been trapped here against their will with the same ruse this unknown person here did to us. Damn Tendoshu.” Katsura looked at the sealed door behind them and tried to open it, only to get electrocuted in the process. He collapsed to the floor.

”KATSURA!” Skele picked him up and the long haired man coughed.

”Ah, ah ah. That’s not kind to walk out on house guests, Takasugi!” The Nameless Man tssked and shook his finger.

“What is all of this, Mr.?! What do you want us to do?” Skele pleaded.

“Yeah, what the hell is all this shit?” A Joui member asked from the opposite side and other former soldiers agreed.

“Fine. You all have no appreciation for the art of suspense.” Nameless crossed his arms and rolled his eyes. “Simple! Take down these two over here to death and you’ll be free!” He pointed to an alarmed Zura and Skele.

”Hey, I think I remember those guys. They were squad leaders. Why should we kill them?” One of them asked and the others agreed.

”I thought you’d never ask.” Nameless giggled and then pressed up his microphone to the force field. It made a terrible nails-on-chalking board like sound. Suddenly, the ground begun to shake and monsterous creatures emerged from the splitting ground.

The gigantic blue serpent like beasts made a deafening roar, panic and commotion spread throughout the group of Jouis.

“I’d reconsider being kind to your former captains if you don’t ALL want to be eaten alive by these Orochi. Now normally legend says these damn ugly looking fellas feed off Altana but since these Tendoshu keep takin’ their only food supplies.. I guess people will have to do!” The Nameless Man giggled again. 

Katsura and Skele looked at each other pale as ghosts in that second. 

Meanwhile Nobu was walking back to the room with the Altana tanks. 

“Damn Shige.. always tryin’ to distract my goals..” He kicked the wall with his shoe.

”Shogun Nobunobu.” A Tendoshu member approached him. “There has been a critical change of plans.”

”Pardon pardner? Now y’all know none of y’all are suppose to change plans without my consent.” Nobu frustratedly crossed his arms. 

“One of those Harusame members has a gift for seeing the future. He has predicted that there is another powerful being than Steve in our world.” 

“I reckon y’all mean Joe. No the Naraku men haven’t been able to capture him ‘n...Oboro.. yet.” He flenched his robotic arm and hand a little.

“No, this person is about to enter our world...” The Tendoshu member said very seriously.

“Oh great, another ‘all powerful’ person to worry about.” He replied in a monotone and rolled his eyes. The two walked out of the tank chamber room. 

 

“mami...”
———
“Joseph, you’re gonna want to come up and see this..” Oboro eye lit up in a room full of familiar faces.

The Shinsengumi, Kyuubei, Otae, Ozu, Shinji, Gendo, Uncle Bill and others were all inside a dojo that was within a few feet of the manhole he and Joe climbed out of.

“HAULT! WHO GOES THERE!” Kyuubei stuck a katana to them. “You DARE challenge the safety of my Otae-san?!” The blade was nearly close enough to cut off the tip of Poe’s poor shaking beak. 

“J-Joe..?!” Toshi ran out of the dojo and embraced his long lost friend. Kondo and Sougo caught up to him momentarily.

“Tosh!” Joe was almost in tears. “Thank god we found more people finally!”

“Where is this place?” Oboro asked. 

There was no outside commotion, it must have still been underground somewhere because there was no sky above them, just cement. It was like a ghost town of empty buildings besides a few people.

“It’s an infamous Joui hideout. What are the odds that we cops finally stumbled upon it finally after searching for years and there’s no damn terrorists.” Sougo rubbed the back of his sleepy head. 

“Thank the chef boss lady over here for locating some shelter ‘til the ‘feds’ capture us.” Kondo chuckled pointed to Ikumatsu who came out and handed him a bowl of steaming ramen.

“Yeah, how did you find this place Ikumatsu-chan?” Kondo’s beloved Otae-san said as she handed Kondo a plate of black death eggs. He fainted from biting into instantly.

“Oh I have my ways.” She proudly smiled and crossed her arms.

Cue back three years ago Katsura shyly gave her a piece of paper with the location and “Will you date me” scribbled on it a 100 times.

“I found it on a piece of paper under the stove I forgot about like 20 years ago.” Ikumatsu just shrugged.

”Ya’ll want some grilled bbq?” Uncle Bill slathered up the hot stove with smokin’ pork feet.

“Special hot sauce, Ungyou-sama and I made it in hell.” Gedomaru wore a blank face and gave a thumbs up.

“Gaa!” Gendo Jr blasted his cyborg arm on the grill.

“My award-winning pig’s feet....” Gendo dropped his empty paper plate and fell to his hands and knees on the ground, as did Uncle Bill a moment later. Shinji facepalmed as the audience laughed.

“We have visitors?!” The princess ran out and greeted the two men.

“Soyo-hime!” They both said back in shock.

Her clothes now resembled that of a commoner. She looked at the two like a concerned little leader.

“Joe-san, Oboro-san, so good to see you two are okay. These days it’s so hard to know how everyone’s doing..” She looked upset, everyone else there feeling her grief. 

Before they could utter anything, another two individuals came out, the shorter one helping the taller one as he had bandages around his abdomen and head.

“Mukuro..” Oboro whispered to himself. “Here let me help..” 

“Oboro, what are you doing here?” Nobume asked.

“You know I could say the same thing about you.” Oboro put his arm over Isaburo’s for support. 

“The Mimawarigumi’s main priority is to guard royalty. Especially with a bunch of useless black coats hanging around.” Isaburo puffed as they finally helped him sit down on seat near everyone and he pulled out his shattered flip phone. “Huh, guess the battery must have finally given out.”

“That’s not like you Isaburo, not having a back up plan.” Matsudaira came out, a jug of beer in his left hand and a cigarette in his right.

“You two came alone, right?” The princess asked Oboro once him and Nobume came back to the others.

Oboro nodded, much to Soyo’s disappointment. Meanwhile Hijikata pulled Joe aside.

“Joe.. any word of..” 

“I haven’t talked to or seen Steve just as long as you have.” Joe couldn’t even look up from the pavement to reply. Hijikata’s heart sunk low, even if he felt like Joe would have answer this way anyway.

“You know.. I feel like if he were here.. He would know what to do next..” Soyo tried to keep her composure. “I don’t know why he’s doing this.” 

“Your brother the Shogun?” Oboro asked confused. Joe and Hijikata joined back with him.

“My cousin..” Soyo begun to tear up. The others looked surprised. 

“No offense Soyo-hime but your cousin Nobunobu is a real-“ Pops started but Soyo shook her head.

“You all don’t understand. It’s not Nobu’s fault. He was raised up differently than you and I..” Tears were forming in her eyes, Otae and Ikumatsu softly rubbed the top of her head. Nobume sat down bellow next to Isaburo.

“Oniichan never blamed Nobunobu for his actions. Because my big brother knew our cousin was different. All our big extended family did. From what I hear from Oniichan growing up ever since our cousin was a little kid and got an accidental blow to the head he had amnesia. He was slower than the other kids in some ways and he truly believed in stories he made up about living in a farm as a cowboy and everyone would tease him for who he was. I can’t imagine how that felt...

My relatives didn’t take this new Nobu lightly, especially since he was bred to be the next Shogun after Oniichan.” Soyo continued. “They thought he was just a ‘useless dumb child’...”

“Please.. you two..” Soyo pointed to Oboro and then to a surprised Nobume. “You know what it’s like to be puppets of the Naraku and Tendoshuu. My cousin may seem to have things under control but he is gullible to the first sight of someone pretending to care about him. P-Please..” Tears were streaming down her face. “Bring them both back, oniichan and our cousin, so we can finally be a family!” She started to bawl, Otae and Ikumatsu holding her now.

”Well all sorts of family have to all stick together no matter where and no matter how long the distance, princess.” Joe put his hand on her shoulder and smiled a little. “We’ll find both our big brothers, alright?” She nodded while wiping away tears.

“And if there’s anything those Tendoshu vermins can’t take away is family.” Nobume briefly glanced at at Isaburo before he saw her doing so and then got up.

“Guess we should hit the road again.” Joe stretched himself and patted Tosh on the shoulder. “It’s not like ol’ Joey to be confine to one place anyway.”

Him, Oboro and Nobume all started to walk in one direction away back to the manhole, the rest of them just stood there watching them go off.

“Please be careful, Joe.” Hijikata whispered.

”Don’t let them capture you, Nobume-san..” Isaburo thought to himself as he held onto the bandages on his stomach.

“Hey queer, let me guess, you and the tin man have no idea where you’re gonna go next.” Nobume looked ahead with a blank expression. Oboro and Poe squint their eyes.

”I’ll have you know Mukuro, I-“

The author was too tired to include all of the bird man’s rambling from this point forward, she already had to write him serious this entire skit, which was burdensome with his butt monkey M personality.

“I’ll have you know author-“

Oh hey a catchy 80’s song that signifies the beginning of a journey.

————

Dear Diary,

Does anyone even use diaries anymore? Whatever, I’ll just write this down on my phone’s notes then. What a hell of a break at my performing arts university. My parents urged me to fly all the way out from Nebraska to California to check out my cousins Steve and Joe, whom I never even really met before except once when I was really little that I don’t remember much of anyway. Sure they send us letters and such on the holidays, but they’re so damn secretive. For instance, when their parents died they were raised up by some foster parents named “Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper”. Who the heck even has names like that? My folks are just worried because they hadn’t answered any of their work calls at their Blue Prints detective agency work place in months. Why not let the local authorities take care of it? Why me? What a strange town.. after I booked a room at a hotel I got the directions to their individual apartments, no answers. Now it’s nearly 9 PM as I’m driving up to their old home my parents supposedly said my cousins grew up in, the lights are on from the inside.

“Hello, anyone here?” The young man knocked on the door. 

After waiting for a solid five minutes, he shrugged and turned around, walking back to his rental car. But a sudden burst of cool wind in the night time sky revealed the door to be unlocked and it swung and banged against the wall. The startled man snapped his head around. 

“Oh no.. oh no no no. I’ve seen plenty of movies that start out this way.” He reached in his pocket for his keys but they slipped and the wind flung them inside the eerily lit home. The man looked at the heavens above him with a sobbing frown. “Why me..?” 

He looked at the front door, still open, lights still on from the inside. “Well, excuse me but your door flung open from the wind and I seemed to drop my keys!” 

No reply. He winced and shook his head. “Really quick, an in and a out. Something in the dark tries to grab you you grab back! ...If I’m not killed first... that is..”

His feet were walking faster than he realized. The man stepped into the home, the living room was directly in front of the front door and a red sofa and side table with a clock on top of it was at the center of it all, odd. 

“Damn where did those keys go..” He whispered as he looked left and right at the long stretch of a room. 

As he turned his head left for a second, a fast banging sound seemed to come in front of him. He jumped and jolted his head back to the sofa. All was normal, except the table that once was there was now gone. 

“I-I’m getting out of here..” He slowly walked backwards and then suddenly there were tiny foot steps he heard. He exhaled. “Get it together, you’re a realist. You’re majoring in philosophy.. music... walking into haunted houses.... Nope! A realist. It’s just another house. You usually scoff at stupid stuff like this..”

“I saw him.. but he doesn’t look like a burglar.” Sidetable Drawer whispered behind a piece of furniture in the same room. 

“Daddy, you’re the in charge of the house until Stevie and Joey get back. Please do something.” Cinnamon said silently.

“They’ve been gone for ages Cinnamon, they’re probably dead at this point.” Paprika whispered to her little brother, he started to cry.

“Hush now children!” Mrs. Pepper told them.

“Sacre Bleu... could it be..?” Mr. Salt looked surprised.

“What? Who is it, Mr. Salt?” Shovel asked.

“A family Mrs. Pepper and I have kept in touch for years zrough, how you say, letters only. Oh boy... if he finds out his Uncle iz but a food seasoner..” He shook his head, the others looked confused. “We must do our best to keep the boy out of ze house, he does not know of ze powers it posesses.”

“Uhh.. Mr. Salt..?” Slippery Soap pointed behind him at the man looking over the chair.

“WHAT THE HELL?!” The guy screamed.

”WOAAAA!” Slippery exclaimed as all the residents of the house quickly scrambled away.

“I GOT TO GET OUT OF THIS CURSED PLACE!! He sprinted back towards the front door but was so caught up in it, he tripped and fell in the red thinking chair. 

MAIL TIME! 

 

MAIL TIME!

 

MAAAAAIIL TIME!

 

“AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!” He physically flung himself over the chair’s right arm as Mailbox flew in without missing a beat. As he got up to run again, he slipped on a book placed near where side table drawer previously was. “I’M A REALIST! I’M A REALIST! I’M A REALIST!”

“Steve! Joe! Wait, that’s not them!” The disembodied children audience called out.

“AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” He tried to muster the strength to get up again, but his legs felt like noodles from the stress.

“Sorry, I got impatient trying to find out where Stevie and Joey went so I asked Side Table to go to the shelf and read the comic book to me!” Cinnamon replied. 

“ZE COMIC BOOK?!” Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper blurted out.

“Yeah Mama and Papa, the comic book! You know, the one that Stevie and Joey went ‘Blue skadoo’ed we can too!’” 

The man shrunk down in size and transported inside the novel. 

“NOOOOOOO!” The residents of the house all yelled and ran up to it on the floor.

“I’m real sorry! I didn’t think that guy would go inside of the book.” Cinnamon frown as his older sister scowled at him. 

“Who was that?!” Mailbox stretched his way to the rest of the gang.

“Mr. Salt, you don’t think...” His wife started.

“Well, where ever zat boy iz in ze comic book, he probably has a better chance finding Steve and Joe zhan we would in our small states.” Mr. Salt sighed and crossed his arms. “Oh Josh my boy, be careful...”

Josh landed on his face upon impact. He shook his head and picked himself up from the ground. Chills ran up and down his spine at what his eyes displayed before him.

...

 

“AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

TBC