Ask the Great Aya anything

[Cha]

so I really wanted to see what they’d look like maybe 10 years later in dad form and this is kind of a rough design of it.

shinsuke would just sit back in his recliner with a scotch and newspaper and tell his 11 kids “go ask your pop” bc he gets overwhelmed easily and cant even take care of his late 30’s self let alone 388394 kids but lovingly tease the hell out of them still and gives them life advice sometimes. (he may have a dad beer gut now)

meanwhile zura is busy with a million house chores/cooking while also teaching them the bushido. he’s nuturing and kind but also strict and firm, bed time for the entire ship is 9:30. and he loudly gets upset at basketball games when the school benches his kids. he’s also the PTA gay mom when he actually bothers to shave

[Aya♥]

6 hours ago, Kody♡ said:

so I really wanted to see what they’d look like maybe 10 years later in dad form and this is kind of a rough design of it.

shinsuke would just sit back in his recliner with a scotch and newspaper and tell his 11 kids “go ask your pop” bc he gets overwhelmed easily and cant even take care of his late 30’s self let alone 388394 kids but lovingly tease the hell out of them still and gives them life advice sometimes. (he may have a dad beer gut now)

meanwhile zura is busy with a million house chores/cooking while also teaching them the bushido. he’s nuturing and kind but also strict and firm, bed time for the entire ship is 9:30. and he loudly gets upset at basketball games when the school benches his kids. he’s also the PTA gay mom when he actually bothers to shave

my brother Zura looks good with the five o'clock shadow, suits him well.  Shinsuke is looking good too, old slicked back Yazuka looking hair.  Very fitting, lovely designs.

[Cha]

 

We were all brought together from that ghost, it was the focus point of our past and present. Yet we were also divided because of him, past and present. I thought we could all fight it off, but in the end it just devoured us all.

“Huh, what? Okay who the hell is writing these lines?!” Gintoki woke up. He picked up the notes and teared them up in an instant. He was sitting at his desk, awoken from his sleep by a mysterious force. “Yeah author, it’s called having letters thrown at your head.” He got up and stretched his arms over his head a bit. “Eh, I thought these breaks between chapters could give a guy some room to relax but you in particular are always finding ways to torture me with these little side stories to entertain yourself in the meantime.”

He sleepily walked away from chair, yawned and scratched his back while going to the kitchen. Something was wrong though, because he had to climb a “hill” to get to the kitchen spot. He put his hand through the cabinet and grabbed out some trash. 

“Oi Kagura-chan!” He called out mockingly in a falsetto voice. “If you ate all Wruit Loops in this box expect my next pay check in the next ten years, the way business is going lately.” He irritatedly smashed his hand through the box, and picked up something hard and big in his grap. 

“Hmm?” He yawned again and finally rubbed his sleepy eyes open. And there he was holding it, a large censored thing. “Huh? Hmm?” Gintoki blinked his eyes to make sure he was seeing it. “EHHH!!!?!” He let go of the pink veiny item in a flash and then looked around. 

“WHAT THE HELL?! W-WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HOUSE?!” The only thing left was his office chair and table, everything else looked like a giant city dump. “WHERE THE HELL AM I!?” 

“You really don’t know, do you Gintoki?” The pile of trash around the pixelated item from earlier got up with a body attached to it. “Hmm, you’ve really haven’t been paying attention in the last 10 years.” The Madao lightly chuckled and adjusted his sunglasses.

Gintoki kicked him in the stomach, causing him to fall. He picked him up by the shoulder and looked gravely into his frightened middle aged eyes, as if Gintoki’s look could curse the man into death with one glare. 

“Where the fuck am I Hasegawa and where the fuck is my house..” 

“W-well have you been asleep the past 10 years o-or something?” Hasegawa tried lighting one up to calm his anxiety but Gintoki put out the flame with his thumb. “O-okay! Well I guess you have! Edo’s a lot different these days and-“

“Wait.... literally... ten years...?” Gintoki looked around the city from a distance from the dump. “As in.... One Zero kind of years....?” His voice was breaking as he examined all the flying amanto ships around Edo. “AAAAHHHH!” 

“Get yourself together man!” Hasegawa told him and then coughed a tremendous amount. His hair was all white and he looked pale. “I’m not the spring chicken I use to be..”

“How much the hell did you age in ten years Hasegawa?! Where is everyone?! How did my house get like this?! WHY ARE YOU NAKED AND WHY DID I HAVE TO TOUCH YOUR JUNK?!”  Gintoki was beyond losing it.

“Well I don’t know that much either, you know, old man brain and such.” Madao hacked it up again and now spoke with a shaking eldery voice. “...Plus don’t act like this is the first time you’ve touched this old man’s little withering Madao..” He bashfully added. 

“LIKE HELL I WOULD WANT TO RECALL THAT EXPERIENCE!” Gintoki shook him out of it. “You just made up that voice you old loon! I bet your faking the whole damn thing right now. In fact, this whole ten years shit is probably a prank everyone pulled on ol’ Gintoki, RIGHT?! RIGHT!?” 

Suddenly a loud tremble came upon the dump island, a giant shadow covered Gintoki and Hasegawa. 

“Eh..? AAAAAHHHH!” Gintoki was picked up by grappling hook by his feet and swung aboard the ship. 

“Good luck my friend!” Butt naked Madao called from below. 

Gintoki fell to his face on the smooth floor of the ship. 

“Eh, Danna. Are you alright?” Gintoki looked up to see the coconut head himself decked out in a black leather jacket and hat. 

“Oi Sougo, what is all of this?” Gintoki looked up and examined the control room full of Shinsengumi members staring back at the perm head.

“Hello Danna!” They all said in sync. 

“Don’t mind them Danna, it’s just weeks since they’ve seen someone that isn’t wearing a police uniform.” Sougo sat down in the captain’s chair and took a swig of a martini looking drink. 

“Huh, what do you mean?” Gintoki asked. “Sougo.. what happened to Edo?” 

“Danna, have you hit your head or something?” Sougo finished the drink. Gintoki shrugged, going along with it.

“Well you see, in the past decade Japan has gone through a lot. We figured much, our little home town is quite a magnet to petty thefts, gangsters and a giant terrorist alliance. But the city really took a toll with outside threats.” Gintoki listened to the police officer intensely. “People were tired of a space worm here or a nameless man there or some cookie making guy claiming to be the ruler of the universe.” Sougo ate the olive inside the martini glass. “So most of them either left to other cities, countries or the casual few who live underground now. Poor bastards, this place is a trash shit heap anyways now. Hard to find food.. or breathable air.” Sougo took out the toothpick from his mouth and flicked it the floor, Gintoki’s nervous eyes followed it.

“Where’s Kagura.. Shinpachi... Sadaharu... the others..?” Gintoki said protectively.

“Hmmm, haven’t heard those names in years. Maybe they just all left with everyone else.” Sougo looked at the giant glass window of the control room, down into Edo visibly filled with waste and trash. “We just figured wherever you go, they both go anyways. But it’s odd to see that you didn’t leave yourself, Danna. I do wonder where those kids ran off to then.” Gintoki felt sick to his stomach.

“I have to find them. Do you have any record of them or any one else that I know of’s location?” Gintoki plead.

“YAMAZAKI!” Sougo called out, in an instant the man came and saluted his superior. “Vice-Chief. 

“Y-yes Chief Sougo?” Yamazaki stumbled. Gintoki looked surprised. 

“Can you take Danna to our locating information room?” He asked.

“Vice-Chief?” Gintoki scoffed. “Way to go kid, you made it up to the big leagues I guess.” He pat the guy on the back.

“Oh he isn’t the person who took that rank.” Sougo snapped his fingers and put his feet on top of Yamazaki’s back. “He’s just my foot stool.”

“L-living the dream! Ow!” Sougo shifted his boots on the man’s back.

“THAT guy is my Vice-Chief.” Sougo pointed to a large man who came out of the shadows, he had a very serious, weather beaten face in a full blue beard. 

“EHH? THAT guy?!! The goof whose name I don’t know but hung around that other goof who’s name I don’t know!” Gintoki said surprised. 

“HEY!” Yamazaki said offended. 

“Say Jimmy...” Gonard looked in the distance as if he was recalling something tragic, he squinted his weather beaten eyes. “Take care of yourself will you?” Gonard picked up Gintoki by the jacket and had him follow him to the destination locator room. 

“So what’s the deal big guy, where’s the gorilla or the mayonnaise freak?” Gintoki nudged him trying to get some answers.

Gonard stopped walking in the hallway, didn’t say anything but squint his weather beaten eyes, looking into the distance at something.

 

“Yeah uh... I’m gonna go check that map room now..” Gintoki just left the blue giant to get lost in his thoughts while he played around with the digital screen to find some similar names. “Well I can’t find a Shimura Shinpachi or Kagura on here...” He tried some other names until finally finding a match. “Takasugi Kotarou. Age 37. Poor Zura, still stuck with that midget’s name. Hmm, really he lives there now? Alright.” Gintoki got the address and bolted out. 

“Vice-Chief! Where did Danna go?” Tetsu came running up to Gonard.

 

“To Cancuun on vacation with the Gorilla and green haired man I think...” Gonard kept his stare. 

“Uhhh...” Testu backed up. 

“Dammit Zura, where are you?” Gintoki had managed to get off the ship and was now running to where the map had located his whereabouts. He caught his breath and looked around the dump of a city he once resided in. Gintoki then was caught off guard as felt two people grab him by his arms and threw him against the wall. 

“Who are you?!” The two men insisted.

“Look, I was just looking for my ol’ pal Zura, I- wait a minute you two look familiar. Like some of Zura’s terrorist goons. I know those tacky smoke bombs from anywhere.” Gintoki eyed them down.

“Of course. He lives here. How would you not know that stranger?” One of them said. Gintoki dusted himself off when he got up and looked at a large building in the sky above them he just noticed. 

“That’s impossible. All I see is the Bakufu cast.... cast.... cast....le... EHHHHHH?!?!”

 

 

“Wait, could he be!?” One of the men whispered to the other man and pointed to Gintoki.

“Alright so called ‘friend’ of Prime Minister Takasugi, follow us.” The other said. Gintoki shrugged and did so into the big pearly gates of the royal castle.

“How did Zura manage to actually overthrow the government..?” Gintoki quietly said to himself while being lead through the floral gardens that led up to the castle’s front entrance. 

“Our Prime Minister sure has his ways that’s for sure.” One of the men smiled. Gintoki squinted his eyes.

“Oh yeah, you goons always did fanboy all over that long haired doofus.” Gintoki instantly had swords surrounding his head. “I-I mean Prime Minister Long Haired Doofus!” They came in closer to his head. “I-I mean Prime Minister Takasugi!! Of course! Aheh.” The guards put their swords back in their sheaths. 

“Uncle Gintoki?!” A boy ran up to him and hugged him around the waist. “I haven’t seen you since I was three months old!”

Uhh, Nephew uh..” Gintoki said. “Wait.. you called me uncle. Does that mean Zura and Shinsuke-“ The guard men stuck their swords at his face again. “H-hey now, your royal heir came up to me, so calm down.”

“Oh you don’t remember my name.” The kid stopped hugging him and looked disappointed. “Well, I understand, I do have a lot of siblings... My name’s Shinsuke!”

“Of course it is.” Gintoki said deadpanned. “Can you show me where your fathers are squirt? I kind of have business with them.” 

“Well Pop is on an important governmental business meeting.. but I can take you to Dad!” Shinsuke Junior smiled.

“Alright.. Whichever that one is..” Gintoki looked at the mean glaring guards and then back at the kid who took the silver haired man by the hand into their lavish palace. 

“Hmm. I think Dad could be in the 10th kitchen or the 12th jacuzzi or maybe.. no wait! In the 23rd living room! It’s his favorite place to watch weird German governors in action movies.” The boy smiled.

“Say Junior, for being an adopted child... You know you really look like your old men.” Gintoki looked at the kid. He had long raven hair tied back in a pony tail similar to how Zura looked as a kid but Shinsuke’s annoying bright green eyes.

“Of course I do! I was genetically created from their DNA samples in test tubes using state of the art Amanto technology along with my other brothers and sisters.” He happily replied.

“Daddy!” Shinsuke Junior called out in an enormous fancy living room with marbel floors.

“Pet spider, it had not to be a pet spider but a giant amanto sized one. YUMI! GET DOWN HERE NOW!” Shinsuke demanded and rolled up his newspaper at the creature hanging from a crystal chandelier. He was sitting in a recliner not bothering getting up. “BANSAI!” 

Bansai came up in a butler costume. “You know, with all the servants you have in this palace Shinsuke, I really don’t need to still be your right hand man-“ The man knocked the wind out of Bansai with the newspaper. 

Gintoki walked in and looked at short midget with slicked back hair, slippers and a robe over his kimono. “Shinsuke..?” 

“Gintoki..?” Shinsuke got up from his recliner.

“Wow he hasn’t done that in weeks.” Bansai said stunned.

“Daaad!” Shinsuke Junior latched onto his father’s ankle. 

“Gintoki...” Shinsuke broke the glass cup of scotch he was holding. “Get out of my house..” 

“What? What did I do? Besides point out that awful slick back gangster hairdo look... and your apparent beer belly.” Gintoki pointed to it. Shinsuke looked down at it and frustratedly covered it up with his burgundy silk robe. 

“Let Uncle Gintoki stay, Dad. I don’t think he remembers anything. He didn’t even remember me being his favorite nephew!” Shinsuke Junior said. 

“I thought Ichika was the favorite nephew.” Shinsuke joked.

“Ichika’s a girl, Dad.” The boy replied.

“Uhh I knew that..” Shinsuke lit up his pipe. “They don’t tell you in school about children hybrids..” Shinsuke looked around and took a sip of his new scotch Bansai handed to him. His son scowled at him. 

“Your mutant son’s right Shinny, I don’t remember anything at all.” Gintoki replied. 

“HEY!” Shinsuke Junior shouted insulted.

“In fact, anything in the last decade I guess.” Gintoki added.

“You don’t remember why I’m so fucking mad-“ Shinsuke looked at his innocent child blinking at him. He picked his son up and held him. “Uh, I mean, you don’t remember why I’m so mad at you? Well news flash, we’re all mad at you Gintoki.”

“Well techinally from what I remember you Jouis were all mad at each other, not just Odd Jobs in particula-“ Bansai was smacked again by Shinsuke’s rolled up newspaper.

“Go on midget, tell me more.” Gintoki said. The guards stuck their swords at him again. “What the hell am I suppose to call this Yazuka lookin’ fool then?”

“You can start calling me First Gentleman Takasugi.” Shinsuke said. Gintoki thought he was joking at first but then saw him squinting his good eye menacingly. “I know what you’re thinking. Why would settle for not not having the Bakufu reigns in my hands myself. Making everyone fall to their knees as I finally achieve the life long goal of taking over this country.. Oh.. that goal.. even as a reformed terrorist all these years.. I can’t help of thinking of being in control over all these little squirmy ants... making those SWINES do my every will as they gravel at my feet....” Shinsuke cluthed his hand and gave a sinister and freaky smile. Shinsuke Junior rolled his eyes.

“Actually I was just wondering where the bathroom was in your Richie Rich Castle.” Gintoki added picking his nose.

“But that man.” Shinsuke blissfully sighed and put a hand on a large painting of the mustache prime minister on the wall. “I was no match for that lovely, handsome man when we both ran for the title, so I dropped out, settled in this aight mansion and raised a couple of children artificially procreated by two males and settled down into the trophy husband/stay-at-home-dad you see here today.”

“More like when Katsura-dono isn’t working, he’s taking care of your children while you have trouble finding the remote with your monsterous belly in the way, ‘Trophy Husband’.” Bansai flinched but Shinsuke stopped right before he hit him with the paper again. 

“Bansai, if you want to play the sassy butler, try not to cower every time I come near you. And I would tell you more about that situation between the Jouis, Gintoki...” Shinsuke kissed his son and ushered him to go play with his other siblings. “..but not after what happened.. that night..” He turned to the large draped windows.

“What night are you talk-“ Gintoki and Shinsuke then were tumbled to the ground by the giant spider. 

“My birthday present arrived?!” The little girl Yumi came rushing in with purple pigtails and a big smile. 

“Who gives a fucking child a bigger than life spider as an gift?!” Gintoki said holding back the fangs of the beast with his bare hands. “AHHHH!”

“Shit.. I forgot another birthday..” Shinsuke said to himself as the spider was spinning him in its web.

“Language! You have your five year old daughter in here-“ Bansai was flung across the room by the creature and landed face first in bowl of caviar on a table.

“THIS IS IT!” Gintoki wailed. Suddenly the giant spider was flung against the wall and it screeched.

“HA!” A man had broke the wall down leaving Bansai and the guards in a frantic state. “I told you Shinsuke’s Daughter #5! You have to feed ol’ hairy legs seven times a day or she gets cranky!” 

“Oh hey Kamui.” Shinsuke said casually dangling upside down from the web.

Kamui kicked the midget off it and into a living room wall with a bunch of paintings and crouched down to the perm head, offering him a hand up. “Samurai Gintoki....?” His blue eyes sparkled.

“I thought you got over your little Samurai crush, Kamui.” Shinsuke rubbed his sore head from the impact as Bansai and his guards helped him up. But then Kamui then kicked Shinsuke out the glass window. Bansai was stunned and couldn’t move.

“THAT’S GODFATHER KAMUI TO YOU, SHINSUKE HA!” Kamui blissfully smiled and then picked up a happy Yumi. “Happy birthday sweetie!”

“Forgive me for being short on greetings but have you seen your sister anywhere, Kamui.” Gintoki said but then stopped in his thoughts when he looked up at him.

 

“Uh... you’re looking well..?” Gintoki tried not to look directly, not to upset the guy but also not to go blind from the light bouncing off of the chrome dome.

“HA!” He gave him a hearty smack on the back. “I bet you say that to all the Yato out there, Samurai!” 

“Believe me, I try not to.” Gintoki rubbed his aching back but Kamui slapped him again, this time to the floor.
——-

“Poe, do you think this white strand of hair makes me look more distinguished?” Oboro asked his flying friend while looking in the mirror.

“Caaw?” Poe shrugged with his wings.

“You’re right Poe, the white strand is hard to see in my hair with my regular white hair.” He sighed while looking out his tinted limo window. “340 and I don’t look a day over 30. It’s funny though, I kind of miss being teased about my hair.. in a warped view sort of way.” Poe was surprised at this, he’d put one eyebrow up if he had any. But then the limo driver opened up his door and told him he arrived.

Oboro walked out the door through the carpeted walkway leading to the government building itself. Guards surrounded him even though it was quite desolate. Even for being a lavish building in the past, it was now starting to look faded and run down, especially with Edo’s current polluted state. 

“If only Sensei saw this town.. it would tear him apart. Is this the kind of universe he imagined?” Oboro wondered. 

“I don’t know. Is it the universe Sensei wanted?”

“Rampaging Noble..” Oboro stared at the man. “Or should I say Prime Minister now.” Oboro extended a hand to him but he declined. Katsura kept staring at him. Oboro put back his hand.

“You’re here to help out the country right now, aren’t you?” Katsura said. “Being the wealthiest man in Japan these days, it would be assumed you came here for something.”

“What happened in the past is the past, I think you would know that well Prime Minister.” Oboro looked at the guards all around him and moreso the country’s leader. “But with all the money restored back into this city, do you think people will really flock back to it? They didn’t just leave because it got polluted and you well know that. It was unsafe to live in with its high threats of crime. Poe landed on his owner’s wrist and he pet him. 

“I’m an optimist. This country has been through a lot worse than its state capital being physically messy.” Katsura told him. “I want to focus on getting it healthy and supporting life better and then talk about the rest later. It’s just our bad luck that we need some dirty money to get the job done.”

“Dirty? Because I’m an actor?” Oboro looked at him.

“You acquired it from backstabbing and stepping over on everyone else in the industry.” Katsura simply stated.

“And what about you Noble? Are you free from being dirty yourself? I know for a fact you only have that high position because no one else wanted it. Everyone else has left Edo, it was free territory even for someone like a record for crime against the state such as yourself.” Katsura just stared at the man. “But that’s not the issue here is it? You will really never get over your petty grunge against me ever even after all these years, Minister?” Oboro turned his back. “I’ll have my agents give you some of it in the next few hours. Until then, Noble.” Oboro walked back to his limo as Zura twinged. His Vice-Prime Minister came by and put a flipper on his shoulder.  

“Thanks Elizabeth.”

——-

“So where to Samurai?” Kamui was driving him on a dinky little ship, only enough room to barely move their elbows in. It was quite puzzling, the pirate captain was with no crew members, his original ship seemed to be gone obviously and of course he was in a blissful state despite it all. But Gintoki didn’t have the time to ask, he needed to know if Shinpachi and Kagura were safe.

”Well I don’t know exactly where they are..” Gintoki had to ponder. If he were them, where would he be? There were too many possibilities on where the kids were at this point. It bothered him even more than it already did. Could he face them after so many years separated? Was he really gone for 10 years? It was all a confusing blur. 

Suddenly the side of the tiny ship was rammed by a bigger ship. 

“AHAH! Those damn HA bastards out for me again.” Kamui flipped a switch and they went into hyperdrive. The tin ship was vibrating violently as it was not use to such speeds.

“Could you not laugh so much Pirate Prince? It’s making me queasy more than I already am.” Gintoki felt like barfing but the windows were sealed shut. 

“H.A. As in initals for the Heroes Association. They’ve been on my tail for 3 years for stealing from them! And ‘PIRATE PRINCE’? You haven’t called me that in years!” Kamui smiled big and grabbed the stirring wheel tight, making the nose of the hunk of junk jolt upward, Gintoki whimpered. “Uh oh.” 

“‘Uh oh’? What DO YOU MEAN, UH OH, KAMUI?” Gintoki yelled while the ship was beeping like crazy now.

”Uh, I might have finally ran out of the crystal powered fuel I stole from them!” He shrugged and sweated.

The ship was still flying upward at top speed but suddenly it stopped for a brief second in mid-air and then started hurtling miles down into the sky. Gintoki was screaming at the top of his lungs, Kamui surprisingly just sat silently trying to think of a solution. 

“Samurai, if we die I have to tell you something..” Kamui opened up. 

“KAMUI I THINK YOU CAN SAVE THE HEARTFELT DISCUSSIONS FOR LATER, IF THERE’S A LATER!!” Gintoki screamed, clinging onto the walls. They were a few feet before crashing into the city’s buildings, Gintoki’s life was flashing before his eyes. 

“I need to confess that...” Kamui looked down for a second and noticed an emergency button. “-that I’m gonna save our butts! YEAH!” He slammed it with his fist and the ship immediately screeched back up in the nick of time. He smiled while Gintoki exhaled deeply.

“Ha! And a chicken leg under my chair, this day keeps getting better and better!” Kamui took a bite of the day old treat. Meanwhile Gintoki fainted from the overwhelming circumstances.

“And it’ll get even better now.” A familiar voice from a megaphone proclaimed outside of their ship. Suddenly they were being retracted with a laser beam inside a bigger ship. 

“Shit.” Kamui tried overriding the effect but to no use. The ship was dropped in a sort of docking area and the door was forced open. “Hey, what gives?! Me and my Samurai buddy were just taking a little flight in this shit hole city!” Kamui stepped out of it and begun to take a few swings but was immediately trapped inside a force field.

“Amanto taking prisoner another Amanto, kind of ironic isn’t it? We’re fighting for peace and odd looking aliens like you ruin it for us.” Kamui smiled. 

“Can it. You know what you did, yato.” The guy said. 

Gintoki snapped out of his state and tumbled up into a sitting position on the ship. He looked out where the door once was. He was shocked on who he saw. “S...Skele..?”

“Gintoki..?” Skele looked at him but then his expression of surprise turned into a sour one.

“Well look who finally came back. Goodbye again.”  Skele turned his back towards him and kept walking with the other men. Kamui was in the force bubble behind him also leaving. 

“Wait a minute. This isn’t like you Skele, not like you at all. Did something happen?” Gintoki walked out of the ship and stood there. Skele stopped and exhaled. 

“You know exactly what happened Gintoki.” He continued walking until he got by two large doors, sliding open for him and his men. 

“Wait, if we could just talk-“ Gintoki took a few steps forward but Skele sharply turned back and had an expression of frustration and loathe that the silver samurai had never seen before on his comrade.

“Gintoki get off my ship before I’m forced to do something I’ll later regret.” Skele simply said and kept moving.

A faint “LET ME OUT HA!” could be heard behind the doors as Gintoki just stood there.

oop and that’s all i have

 

[Aya♥]

8 hours ago, Kody♡ said:

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We were all brought together from that ghost, it was the focus point of our past and present. Yet we were also divided because of him, past and present. I thought we could all fight it off, but in the end it just devoured us all.

“Huh, what? Okay who the hell is writing these lines?!” Gintoki woke up. He picked up the notes and teared them up in an instant. He was sitting at his desk, awoken from his sleep by a mysterious force. “Yeah author, it’s called having letters thrown at your head.” He got up and stretched his arms over his head a bit. “Eh, I thought these breaks between chapters could give a guy some room to relax but you in particular are always finding ways to torture me with these little side stories to entertain yourself in the meantime.”

He sleepily walked away from chair, yawned and scratched his back while going to the kitchen. Something was wrong though, because he had to climb a “hill” to get to the kitchen spot. He put his hand through the cabinet and grabbed out some trash. 

“Oi Kagura-chan!” He called out mockingly in a falsetto voice. “If you ate all Wruit Loops in this box expect my next pay check in the next ten years, the way business is going lately.” He irritatedly smashed his hand through the box, and picked up something hard and big in his grap. 

“Hmm?” He yawned again and finally rubbed his sleepy eyes open. And there he was holding it, a large censored thing. “Huh? Hmm?” Gintoki blinked his eyes to make sure he was seeing it. “EHHH!!!?!” He let go of the pink veiny item in a flash and then looked around. 

“WHAT THE HELL?! W-WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HOUSE?!” The only thing left was his office chair and table, everything else looked like a giant city dump. “WHERE THE HELL AM I!?” 

“You really don’t know, do you Gintoki?” The pile of trash around the pixelated item from earlier got up with a body attached to it. “Hmm, you’ve really haven’t been paying attention in the last 10 years.” The Madao lightly chuckled and adjusted his sunglasses.

Gintoki kicked him in the stomach, causing him to fall. He picked him up by the shoulder and looked gravely into his frightened middle aged eyes, as if Gintoki’s look could curse the man into death with one glare. 

“Where the fuck am I Hasegawa and where the fuck is my house..” 

“W-well have you been asleep the past 10 years o-or something?” Hasegawa tried lighting one up to calm his anxiety but Gintoki put out the flame with his thumb. “O-okay! Well I guess you have! Edo’s a lot different these days and-“

“Wait.... literally... ten years...?” Gintoki looked around the city from a distance from the dump. “As in.... One Zero kind of years....?” His voice was breaking as he examined all the flying amanto ships around Edo. “AAAAHHHH!” 

“Get yourself together man!” Hasegawa told him and then coughed a tremendous amount. His hair was all white and he looked pale. “I’m not the spring chicken I use to be..”

“How much the hell did you age in ten years Hasegawa?! Where is everyone?! How did my house get like this?! WHY ARE YOU NAKED AND I HAD TO TOUCH YOUR JUNK?!”  Gintoki was beyond losing it.

“Well I don’t know that much either, you know, old man brain and such.” Madao hacked it up again and now spoke with a shaking eldery voice. “...Plus don’t act like this is the first time you’ve touched this old man’s little withering Madao..” He bashfully added. 

“LIKE HELL I WOULD WANT TO RECALL THAT EXPERIENCE!” Gintoki shook him out of it. “You just made up that voice you old loon! I bet your faking the whole damn thing right now. In fact, this whole ten years shit is probably a prank everyone pulled on ol’ Gintoki, RIGHT?! RIGHT!?” 

Suddenly a loud tremble came upon the dump island, a giant shadow covered Gintoki and Hasegawa. 

“Eh..? AAAAAHHHH!” Gintoki was picked up by grappling hook by his feet and swung aboard the ship. 

“Good luck my friend!” Butt naked Madao called from below. 

Gintoki fell to his face on the smooth floor of the ship. 

“Eh, Danna. Are you alright?” Gintoki looked up to see the coconut head himself decked out in a black leather jacket and hat. 

“Oi Sougo, what is all of this?” Gintoki looked up and examined the control room full of Shinsengumi members staring back at the perm head.

“Hello Danna!” They all said in sync. 

“Don’t mind them Danna, it’s just weeks since they’ve seen someone that isn’t wearing a police uniform.” Sougo sat down in the captain’s chair and took a swig of a martini looking drink. 

“Huh, what do you mean?” Gintoki asked. “Sougo.. what happened to Edo?” 

“Danna, have you hit your head or something?” Sougo finished the drink. Gintoki shrugged, going along with it.

“Well you see, in the past decade Japan has gone through a lot. We figured much, our little home town is quite a magnet to petty thefts, gangsters and a giant terrorist alliance. But the city really took a toll with outside threats.” Gintoki listened to the police officer intensely. “People were tired of a space worm here or a nameless man there or some cookie making guy claiming to be the ruler of the universe.” Sougo ate the olive inside the martini glass. “So most of them either left to other cities, countries or the casual few who live underground now. Poor bastards, this place is a trash shit heap anyways now. Hard to find food.. or breathable air.” Sougo took out the toothpick from his mouth and flicked it the floor, Gintoki’s nervous eyes followed it.

“Where’s Kagura.. Shinpachi... Sadaharu... the others..?” Gintoki said protectively.

“Hmmm, haven’t heard those names in years. Maybe they just all left with everyone else.” Sougo looked at the giant glass window of the control room, down into Edo visibly filled with waste and trash. “We just figured wherever you go, they both go anyways. But it’s odd to see that you didn’t leave yourself, Danna. I do wonder where those kids ran off to then.” Gintoki felt sick to his stomach.

“I have to find them. Do you have any record of them or any one else that I know of’s location?” Gintoki plead.

“YAMAZAKI!” Sougo called out, in an instant the man came and saluted his superior. “Vice-Chief. 

“Y-yes Chief Sougo?” Yamazaki stumbled. Gintoki looked surprised. 

“Can you take Danna to our locating information room?” He asked.

“Vice-Chief?” Gintoki scoffed. “Way to go kid, you made it up to the big leagues I guess.” He pat the guy on the back.

“Oh he isn’t the person who took that rank.” Sougo snapped his fingers and put his feet on top of Yamazaki’s back. “He’s just my foot stool.”

“L-living the dream! Ow!” Sougo shifted his boots on the man’s back.

“THAT guy is my Vice-Chief.” Sougo pointed to a large man who came out of the shadows, he had a very serious, weather beaten face in a full blue beard. 

“EHH? THAT guy?!! The goof whose name I don’t know but hung around that other goof who’s name I don’t know!” Gintoki said surprised. 

“HEY!” Yamazaki said offended. 

“Say Jimmy...” Gonard looked in the distance as if he was recalling something tragic, he squinted his weather beaten eyes. “Take care of yourself will you?” Gonard picked up Gintoki by the jacket and had him follow him to the destination locator room. 

“So what’s the deal big guy, where’s the gorilla or the mayonnaise freak?” Gintoki nudged him trying to get some answers.

Gonard stopped walking in the hallway, didn’t say anything but squint his weather beaten eyes, looking into the distance at something.

 

“Yeah uh... I’m gonna go check that map room now..” Gintoki just left the blue giant to get lost in his thoughts while he played around with the digital screen to find some similar names. “Well I can’t find a Shimura Shinpachi or Kagura on here...” He tried some other names until finally finding a match. “Takasugi Kotarou. Age 37. Poor Zura, still stuck with that midget’s name. Hmm, really he lives there now? Alright.” Gintoki got the address and bolted out. 

“Vice-Chief! Where did Danna go?” Tetsu came running up to Gonard.

 

“To Cancuun on vacation with the Gorilla and green haired man I think...” Gonard kept his stare. 

“Uhhh...” Testu backed up. 

“Dammit Zura, where are you?” Gintoki had managed to get off the ship and was now running to where the map had located his whereabouts. He caught his breath and looked around the dump of a city he once resided in. Gintoki then was caught off guard as felt two people grab him by his arms and threw him against the wall. 

“Who are you?!” The two men insisted.

“Look, I was just looking for my ol’ pal Zura, I- wait a minute you two look familiar. Like some of Zura’s terrorist goons. I know those tacky smoke bombs from anywhere.” Gintoki eyed them down.

“Of course. He lives here. How would you not know that stranger?” One of them said. Gintoki dusted himself off when he got up and looked at a large building in the sky above them he just noticed. 

“That’s impossible. All I see is the Bakufu cast.... cast.... cast....le... EHHHHHH?!?!”

 

 

“Wait, could he be!?” One of the men whispered to the other man and pointed to Gintoki.

“Alright so called ‘friend’ of Prime Minister Takasugi, follow us.” The other said. Gintoki shrugged and did so into the big pearly gates of the royal castle.

“How did Zura manage to actually overthrow the government..?” Gintoki quietly said to himself while being lead through the floral gardens that led up to the castle’s front entrance. 

“Our Prime Minister sure has his ways that’s for sure.” One of the men smiled. Gintoki squinted his eyes.

“Oh yeah, you goons always did fanboy all over that long haired doofus.” Gintoki instantly had swords surrounding his head. “I-I mean Prime Minister Long Haired Doofus!” They came in closer to his head. “I-I mean Prime Minister Takasugi!! Of course! Aheh.” The guards put their swords back in their sheaths. 

“Uncle Gintoki?!” A boy ran up to him and hugged him around the waist. “I haven’t seen you since I was three months old!”

“Uhh, Nephew uh..” Gintoki said. “Wait.. you called me uncle. Does that mean Zura and Shinsuke-“ The guard men stuck their swords at his face again. “H-hey now, your royal heir came up to me, so calm down.”

“Oh you don’t remember my name.” The kid stopped hugging him and looked disappointed. “Well, I understand, I do have a lot of siblings... My name’s Shinsuke!”

“Of course it is.” Gintoki said deadpanned. “Can you show me where your fathers are squirt? I kind of have business with them.” 

“Well Pop is on an important governmental business meeting.. but I can take you to Dad!” Shinsuke Junior smiled.

“Alright.. Whichever that one is..” Gintoki looked at the mean glaring guards and then back at the kid who took the silver haired man by the hand into their lavish palace. 

“Hmm. I think Dad could be in the 10th kitchen or the 12th jacuzzi or maybe.. no wait! In the 23rd living room! It’s his favorite place to watch weird German governors in action movies.” The boy smiled.

“Say Junior, for being an adopted child... You know you really look like your old men.” Gintoki looked at the kid. He had long raven hair tied back in a pony tail similar to how Zura looked as a kid but Shinsuke’s annoying bright green eyes.

“Of course I do! I was genetically created from their DNA samples in test tubes using state of the art Amanto technology along with my other brothers and sisters.” He happily replied.

“Daddy!” Shinsuke Junior called out in an enormous fancy living room with marbel floors.

“Pet spider, it had not to be a pet spider but a giant amanto sized one. YUMI! GET DOWN HERE NOW!” Shinsuke demanded and rolled up his newspaper at the creature hanging from a crystal chandelier. He was sitting in a recliner not bothering getting up. “BANSAI!” 

Bansai came up in a butler costume. “You know, with all the servants you have in this palace Shinsuke, I really don’t need to still be your right hand man-“ The man knocked the wind out of Bansai with the newspaper. 

Gintoki walked in and looked at short midget with slicked back hair, slippers and a robe over his kimono. “Shinsuke..?” 

“Gintoki..?” Shinsuke got up from his recliner.

“Wow he hasn’t done that in weeks.” Bansai said stunned. 

“Daaad!” Shinsuke Junior latched onto his father’s ankle. 

“Gintoki...” Shinsuke broke the glass cup of scotch he was holding. “Get out of my house..” 

“What? What did I do? Besides point out that awful slick back gangster hairdo look... and your apparent beer belly.” Gintoki pointed to it. Shinsuke looked down at it and frustratedly covered it up with his burgundy silk robe. 

“Let Uncle Gintoki stay, Dad. I don’t think he remembers anything. He didn’t even remember me being his favorite nephew!” Shinsuke Junior said. 

“I thought Ichika was the favorite nephew.” Shinsuke joked.

“Ichika’s a girl, Dad.” The boy replied.

“Uhh I knew that..” Shinsuke lit up his pipe. “They don’t tell you in school about children hybrids..” Shinsuke looked around and took a sip of his new scotch Bansai handed to him. His son scowled at him. 

“Your mutant son’s right Shinny, I don’t remember anything at all.” Gintoki replied. 

“HEY!” Shinsuke Junior shouted insulted.

“In fact, anything in the last decade I guess.” Gintoki added.

“You don’t remember why I’m so fuc-“ Shinsuke looked at his innocent child blinking at him. He picked his son up and held him. “I mean, you don’t remember why I’m so mad at you? Well news flash, we’re all mad at you Gintoki.”

“Well techinally from what I remember you Jouis were all mad at each other, not just Odd Jobs in particula-“ Bansai was smacked again by Shinsuke’s rolled up newspaper.

“Go on midget, tell me more.” Gintoki said. The guards stuck their swords at him again. “What the hell am I suppose to call this Yazuka lookin’ fool then?”

“You can start calling me First Gentleman Takasugi.” Shinsuke said. Gintoki thought he was joking at first but then saw him squinting his good eye menacingly. “I know what you’re thinking. Why would settle for not not having the Bakufu reigns in my hands myself. Making everyone fall to their knees as I finally achieve the life long goal of taking over this country.. Oh.. that goal.. even as a reformed terrorist all these years.. I can’t help of thinking of being in control over all these little squirmy ants... making those SWINES do my every will as they gravel at my feet....” Shinsuke cluthed his hand and gave a sinister and freaky smile. Shinsuke Junior rolled his eyes.

“Actually I was wondering where the bathroom was in this gigantic dome.” Gintoki added picking his nose.

“But that man.” Shinsuke blissfully sighed and put a hand on a large painting of the mustache prime minister on the wall. “I was no match for that lovely, handsome man when we both ran for the title, so I dropped out, settled in this aight mansion and raised a couple of children artificially procreated by two males and settled down into the trophy husband/stay-at-home-dad you see here today.”

“More like when Katsura-dono isn’t working, he’s taking care of your children while you have trouble finding the remote with your monsterous belly in the way, ‘Trophy Husband’.” Bansai flinched but Shinsuke stopped right before he hit him with the paper again. 

“Bansai, if you want to play the sassy butler, try not to coward every time I come near you. And I would tell you more about that situation between the Jouis, Gintoki...” Shinsuke kissed his son and ushered him to go play with his other siblings. “..but not after what happened.. that night..” He turned to the large draped windows.

“What night are you talk-“ Gintoki and Shinsuke then were tumbled to the ground by the giant spider. 

“My birthday present arrived?!” The little girl Yumi came rushing in with purple pigtails and a big smile. 

“Who gives a fucking child a bigger than life spider as an gift?!” Gintoki said holding back the fangs of the beast with his bare hands. “AHHHH!”

“Shit.. I forgot another birthday..” Shinsuke said to himself as the spider was spinning him in its web.

“Language! You have your five year old daughter in here-“ Bansai was flung across the room by the creature and landed face first in bowl of caviar on a table.

“THIS IS IT!” Gintoki wailed. Suddenly the giant spider was flung against the wall and it screeched.

“HA!” A man had broke the wall down leaving Bansai and the guards in a frantic state. “I told you Shinsuke’s Daughter #5! You have to feed ol’ hairy legs seven times a day or she gets cranky!” 

“Oh hey Kamui.” Shinsuke said casually dangling upside down from the web.

Kamui kicked the midget off it and into a living room wall with a bunch of paintings and crouched down to the perm head, offering him a hand up. “Samurai Gintoki....?” His blue eyes sparkled.

“I thought you got over your little Samurai crush, Kamui.” Shinsuke rubbed his sore head from the impact as Bansai and his guards helped him up. But then Kamui then kicked Shinsuke out the glass window. Bansai was stunned and couldn’t move.

“THAT’S GODFATHER KAMUI TO YOU, SHINSUKE HA!” Kamui blissfully smiled and then picked up a happy Yumi. “Happy birthday sweetie!”

“Forgive me for being short on greetings but have you seen your sister anywhere, Kamui.” Gintoki said but then stopped in his thoughts when he looked up at him.

 

“Uh... you’re looking well..?” Gintoki tried not to look directly, not to upset the guy but also not to go blind from the light bouncing off of the chrome dome.

“HA!” He gave him a hearty smack on the back. “I bet you say that to all the Yato out there, Samurai!” 

“Believe me, I try not to.” Gintoki rubbed his aching back but Kamui slapped him again, this time to the floor.
——-

“Poe, do you think this white strand of hair makes me look more distinguished?” Oboro asked his flying friend while looking in the mirror.

“Caaw?” Poe shrugged with his wings.

“You’re right Poe, the white strand is hard to see in my hair with my regular white hair.” He sighed while looking out his tinted limo window. “340 and I don’t look a day over 30. It’s funny though, I kind of miss being teased about my hair.. in a warped view sort of way.” Poe was surprised at this, he’d put one eyebrow up if he had any. But then the limo driver opened up his door and told him he arrived.

Oboro walked out the door through the carpeted walkway leading to the government building itself. Guards surrounded him even though it was quite desolate. Even for being a lavish building in the past, it was now starting to look faded and run down, especially with Edo’s current polluted state. 

“If only Sensei saw this town.. it would tear him apart. Is this the kind of universe he imagined?” Oboro wondered. 

“I don’t know. Is it the universe Sensei wanted?”

“Rampaging Noble..” Oboro stared at the man. “Or should I say Prime Minister now.” Oboro extended a hand to him but he declined. Katsura kept staring at him. Oboro reacted his hand.

“You’re here to help out the country right now, aren’t you?” Katsura said. “Being the wealthiest man in Japan these days, it would be assumed you came here for something.”

“What happened in the past is the past, I think you would know that well Prime Minister.” Oboro looked at the guards all around him and moreso the country’s leader. “But with all the money restored back into this city, do you think people will really flock back to it? They didn’t just leave because it got polluted and you well know that.” Poe landed on his owner’s wrist and he pet him. 

“I’m an optimist. This country has been through a lot worse than its state capital in physically messy.” Katsura told him. “I want to focus on getting it healthy for supporting life better and then talk about the rest. It’s just our bad luck that we need some dirty money to get the job done.”

“Dirty? Because I’m an actor?” Oboro looked at him.

“You acquired it from stepping over on everyone else in the industry.” Katsura simply stated.

“And what about you Noble? Are you free from sin yourself? I know for a fact you only have that high position because no one else wanted it. Everyone else has left Edo, it was free territory even for someone like you.” Katsura just stared at the man. “But that’s not the issue here is it? You will really never get over your petty grunge against me ever even after all these years, Minister?” Oboro turned his back. “I’ll have my agents give you some of it in the next few hours. Until then, Noble.” Oboro walked back to his limo as Zura twinged. His Vice-Prime Minister came by and put a flipper on his shoulder.  

“Thanks Elizabeth.”

——-

“So where to Samurai?” Kamui was driving him on a tinky little ship, only enough room to barely move their elbows in. It was quite puzzling, the pirate captain was with no crew members, his original ship seemed to be gone obviously and of course he was in a blissful state despite it all. But Gintoki didn’t have the time to ask, he needed to know if Shinpachi and Kagura were safe.

”Well I don’t know exactly where they are..” Gintoki had to ponder. If he were them, where would he be? There were too many possibilities on where the kids were at this point. It bothered him even more than it already did. Could he face them after so many years separated? Was he really gone for 10 years? It was all a confusing blur. 

Suddenly the side of the tiny ship was rammed by a bigger ship. 

“AHAH! Those damn HA bastards out for me again.” Kamui flipped a switch and they went into hyperdrive. The tin ship was vibrating violently as it was not use to such speeds.

“Could you not laugh so much Pirate Prince? It’s making me queasy more than I already am.” Gintoki felt like barfing but the windows were sealed shut. 

“H.A. As in initals for the Heroes Association. They’ve been on my tail for 3 years for stealing from them! And ‘PIRATE PRINCE’? You haven’t called me that in years!” Kamui smiled big and grabbed the stirring wheel tight, making the nose of the hunk of junk jolt upward, Gintoki whimpered. “Uh oh.” 

“‘Uh oh’? What DO YOU MEAN, UH OH, KAMUI?” Gintoki yelled while the ship was beeping like crazy now.

”Uh, I might have finally ran out of the crystal powered fuel I stole from them!” He shrugged and sweated.

The ship was still flying upward at top speed but suddenly it stopped for a brief second in mid-air and then started hurtling miles down into the sky. Gintoki was screaming at the top of his lungs, Kamui surprisingly just sat silently trying to think of a solution. 

“Samurai, if we die I have to tell you something..” Kamui opened up. 

“KAMUI I THINK YOU CAN SAVE THE HEARTFELT DISCUSSIONS FOR LATER, IF THERE’S A LATER!!” Gintoki screamed, clinging onto the walls. They were a few feet before crashing into the city’s buildings, Gintoki’s life was flashing before his eyes. 

“I need to confess that...” Kamui looked down for a second and noticed an emergency button. “-that I’m gonna save our butts! YEAH!” He slammed it with his fist and the ship immediately screeched back up in the nick of time. He smiled while Gintoki exhaled deeply.

“Ha! And a chicken leg under my chair, this day keeps getting better and better!” Kamui took a bite of the day old treat. Meanwhile Gintoki fainted from the overwhelming circumstances.

“And I’ll get even better.” A familiar voice from a megaphone proclaimed outside of their ship. Suddenly they were being retracted with a laser beam inside a bigger ship. 

“Shit.” Kamui tried overriding the effect but to no use. The ship was dropped in a sort of docking area and the door was forced open. “Hey, what gives?! Me and my Samurai buddy were just taking a little flight in this shit hole city!” Kamui stepped out of it and begun to take a few swings but was immediately trapped inside a force field.

“Amanto taking prisoner another Amanto, kind of ironic isn’t it? We’re fighting for peace and odd looking aliens like you ruin it for us.” The redhead smiled. 

“Can it. You know what you did, yato.” The guy said. 

Gintoki snapped out of his state and tumbled up into a sitting position on the ship. He looked out where the door once was. He was shocked on who he saw. “S...Skele..?”

“Gintoki..?” Skele looked at him but then his expression of surprised turned into a sour one.

“Well look who finally came back. Goodbye again.”  Skele turned his back towards him and kept walking with the other men. Kamui was in the force bubble behind him also leaving. 

“Wait a minute. This isn’t like you Skele, not like you at all. Did something happen?” Gintoki walked out of the ship and stood there. Skele stopped and exhaled. 

“You know exactly what happened Gintoki.” He continued walking until he got by two large doors, sliding open for him and his men. 

“Wait, if we could just talk-“ Gintoki took a few steps forward but Skele sharply turned back and had an expression of frustration and loathe that the silver samurai had never seen before on his comrade.

“Gintoki get off my ship before I’m forced to do something I’ll later regret.” Skele simply said and kept moving.

A faint “LET ME OUT HA!” could be heard behind the doors as Gintoki just stood there.

oop and that’s all i have

 

why is Oboro so swagged out, call him ranch cause he be dressing. great shit bruddah

[Cha]

fav parts ?

[Aya♥]

On 8/26/2018 at 9:19 AM, Kody♡ said:

fav parts ?

Gonard and Shinsuke for sure, they had me rollin

[Cha]

when u want to assert your governmental authority as first gentleman inside the prime minister’s little castle but hes too busy scrolling through his phone?

[Aya♥]

7 hours ago, Kody♡ said:

when u want to assert your governmental authority as first gentleman inside the prime minister’s little castle but hes too busy scrolling through his phone?

Zura is a busy man

[Cha]

these gross ossans are my new life i cannot believe it

 

[Aya♥]

2 hours ago, Kody♡ said:

these gross ossans are my new life i cannot believe it

 

nasty ossans smh

[Cha]

if oboros such a fancy pants actor why doesnt he just pay a male escort or go yoshiwara to get laid

[Aya♥]

On 8/30/2018 at 1:38 PM, Kody♡ said:

if oboros such a fancy pants actor why doesnt he just pay a male escort or go yoshiwara to get laid

I think he wants passion

[Old Man Jenkins]

All In predictions?

[Aya♥]

On 8/31/2018 at 7:15 PM, Old Man Jenkins said:

All In predictions?

Marty is going to put on a 3 star match with Okada

[Cha]

oops

I should have never come home early?

[Aya♥]

15 minutes ago, Kody♡ said:

oops

I should have never come home early?

he would totally serenade him

[Cha]

-shinsuke destroys uno game for no one paying attention to his terrible joke-

[Aya♥]

44 minutes ago, Kody♡ said:

-shinsuke destroys uno game for no one paying attention to his terrible joke-

a true monster

[Old Man Jenkins]

My first attempt at importing DM into the Fire Pro Wrestling World?

[Cha]

when chef katsura isnt around and u all want lasagna so u try to summon him w/ yakult