Popular Post Old Man Jenkins Posted September 14, 2015 Popular Post Share Posted September 14, 2015 As per ex-overlord Clap's request. Better late than never. Hopefully it's up to his standards. Tried me best to make do with what i got. Don't know why he gets me to do these /uploads/emoticons/default_stinkeye.png Was going to write the second part but this one alone drained my creativity for today. Bai. Episode 1a: Downtown Bikini Bottom As Fruits It was one of those days at Boating School 118. Hayden and his class were rehearsing for the school's presentation of the play "Rent (only from the point of view of the food inside their refrigerator)" directed by Katniss L. Tacos, and Hayden was having another one of his fantasies about getting every dinosaur in Hawaii to follow him. Katniss gets sassy and warns everyone (especially Hayden) to be ready for showtime tonight, or else he'll get to meat "Big Bessie", which is what she calls her vagina. Later, Hayden and his best friend, Teenjerald, travel to the school by bus dressed as a banana and strawberry respectively in what seems to be roles casted for Kat's own fantasies. They're both embarrassed by their typecasting and Teenjerald moans about not wanting to be made a fool of in front of the xat, thinking maybe they should buy mod for a day and abuse the powers in order to get back at Kat. Hayden is unsure because it sounds fuckin stupid, but Teenjerald assures him that his friend, Fuzzy Jjs, can make sure they get away with it scot-free. But they end up settling on just no-showing the play instead, deciding to just go wherever the bus takes them. Back at B.S. 118, Kat is giving a demotivational speech to the cast and crew and realizes that her fruits are not there. This causes her to do some kicking and to warn the owner of the yellow sedan that they left their lights on. On the bus, Hayden and Teenjerald wait out all the way til the end of the line. They finally disembark, flabbergasted that the end of the line has taken them to the bus station of all places. Which is in Downtown Bikini Bottom. As fruits. They come across an ask thread and, hoping it belongs to one of their relatives, decides to bump it. Teenjerald: Hello, mommy? It's me, Teenjerald! Having wasted their only bump card, they're suddenly approached by Old Man Jenkins, screeching by in his jalopy. He tosses them a paper bag full of doubloons, telling them that they know what it's for. They search inside and unearth the receipt. Hayden comes to the conclusion that people downtown bikini bottom sure are friendly, so he follows Jenkins' twitter, hoping he'll follow back. They leave right before The Is Patrick and GreatWizard arrives, waiting for the drop from Jenks. The two then decide to splurge the doubloons on some name changes and the new summer looks such as the ranger scout uniform and the upside down mariachi hat before Hayden treats everyone to his twitter. Meanwhile Katpiss has been forced to stretch out the play, as well as her legs as she begins to go on one of her two-faced soliloquies about how she hates Haydingus, but yet, she loves him! Katniss: Hayden, my love. My sultry prepube. Storm: Hiii Katnass! Kat slugs him in the face, breaking his glasses (and nose) upon contact. All is going well for Hayden and Teenjerald until they see OMJ arguing with The Is Patrick and GreatWizard inside one of the nearby threads. The Is Patrick: What do you mean you gave em to the wrong beggar?! What'd this other loser look like?! OMJ: Well, he looked pretty desperate, pale, egomaniacal, the kind of dude who would follow for follow anyone on twitter. Kinda like that guy https://mobile.twitter.com/BrentheMagician With their cover blown, Hayden and Teenjerald make like a pair and split with OMJ, The Is Patrick and GreatWizard on their tails. They eventually lose them by entering The Murder Hut of resident Canadi-indian psychotic, SOFoni Jones. SOFoni Jones: Who u?! I seeeee...you Elastic! And you aaaare...Elastic! After that display of ineptitude, SOFoni proceeds to be even less help by giving them an herbal canadi-indian cure for their grandmas's broken leg. Hayden and Teenjerald both decide to just fuck this asshat and return to Katniss' play, but not before SOFoni Jones gives Hayden one final prediction. SOFoni: Kali doesn't "like you-like you", she just likes you. But Hayden should've foreseen that. Hayden and Teenjerald recover their fruit costumes from the industrial park and take a petty cab owned and operated by Newleaffan back to school. While on the trip back, Hayden decides to help a family with car troubles by giving them a follow on twitter so they can follow him back later. They then drive by OMJ, The Is Patrick and GreatWizard, who have all been cornered by the police for doubloon begging. OMJ: We're friends bound by money! We'll be going down together, pigs! OMJ: Goshdangit. The law guns OMJ down as Hayden and Teenjerald finally make it back to B.S. 118 where they single-handedly save the play, but not Katniss' pants, from falling apart by performing their musical duet number "We're Fruits Owned By Fruits". The crowd eats those fruits up, literally. Katniss is seen watching from backstage. She laments how she wants to strangle, then hug, then strangle, then strangle Hayden with a hug until the the curtain calls her over the head and knocks her crazy ass out like Adam West when it's time to go night night. Hayden returns home later that night to find out that Grandma Chaz broke her leg while trying to get her dungeon up on the roof. 17 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
illiniguy34 Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 *sniff* This was the most beautiful thing I've ever read. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Metal Snake Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 Good job! There is just a strange entertainment value to these SBC parodies. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katniss Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 Oh golly, Jenks I did get a kick out of this. Good job! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hayden Posted September 14, 2015 Share Posted September 14, 2015 Yay, I've been photoshopped! Excellent Kali jab with SOFoni. I'll foresee that again when I face her at college tomorrow. Though the twitter jokes were subpar considering I only did that for like a day for competitive motives. At least I still have a secret admirer that wants to hug strangle me. You should take Clappy's orders and parody every Helga/Arnold episode ever to boot. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clappy Posted September 19, 2015 Share Posted September 19, 2015 This was perfect. Part two can't come soon enough. xD 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Car Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 These pictures really enhance the reading experience by like a thousand 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hayden Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 This show is the closest thing to drugs that I'll ever experience 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katniss Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Well Jenks, you've done it again That was too funny. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clappy Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 So many great lines in this, but I think Omair's line about his family was lowkey the best. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Estonia Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Are you gonna tackle stoop kidd? Also Great show! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Jenkins Posted October 7, 2015 Author Share Posted October 7, 2015 Are you gonna tackle stoop kidd? Also Great show!Yeah, I'll definitely tackle dat one when the time comes. The next one will be an Arnold/Helga-heavy one, so prepare to see the sparks continue to fly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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