Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

[NegiSpongie]

It's come to this...the third and final installment of Keeper of the Spatula. Will they make it to the Arctic Ocean to dispose of the cursed spatula of Hoagie Grindulas.

Enjoy the first chapter and please review...

[NegiSpongie]

[align=center][align=center]Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

Chapter 15: Climb to the Future[/align]

[/align]

Later that afternoon, SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward, and Plankton were walking through a dim forest. However, unlike all the other forest they’ve been through the past couple days; this one seemed a bit on the downer side: no grass and lifeless trees everywhere you look.

“Are you sure about this shortcut to the Arctic Ocean?” Squidward asked Plankton, who had told them of this shortcut he heard.

From atop of SpongeBob’s head, Plankton answered his question with a calm smile. “Of course I am. After all, I did say I’d get ya there.”

“That you did.” SpongeBob said with a smile. “I do like shortcuts after all.”

“Who doesn’t?” Squidward added as he dourly put the hood of his cloak over his head to cover his face. “The sooner this nightmare ends the better.”

While walking, SpongeBob glanced over at Patrick, who was a little ways next to him and asked, “Hey, Pat, you still have the krabby patties I made back in the village, right?”

Patrick pointed the mini fridge on his back toward SpongeBob and answered with a smile, “I sure do. All safe and sound in order to be preserved.”

“You’re the best, Patrick.” SpongeBob said with a thankful smile.

“Can I scout ahead this time?” Patrick asked eagerly.

“You sure can, pal.”

Patrick cheered in excitement and ran ahead to do the scouting. Plankton watched this from atop of SpongeBob’s head and suddenly smirked as an idea formed in his mind.

“Hey SpongeBob,” he began saying in a casual tone. “You sure are lucky to have traveling companions like Patrick and Squidward on your side.”

“I know, aren’t they great?” SpongeBob sighed as he got a small smile. “I would have never made it this far without them.”

“Yeah, that’s fantastic.” Plankton nonchalantly said until he spoke in a serious tone, “But are you sure you can really trust them?”

This made SpongeBob confused. “What do you mean?”

“Well, that golden spatula you’re carrying makes the most delicious krabby patties anyone in this world will ever taste.” Plankton explained. “Anyone would want it…even them.”

SpongeBob thought about this and quickly glanced behind him to see Squidward just walking with an expressionless frown as his hood covered his head; and then looked back ahead of him to see Patrick running left and right as his way of scouting what was ahead.

The sponge shook his head and tried to smile again. “That’s crazy talk, Plankton.” He said as he waved his hand in disbelief. “Patrick and Squidward are my best friends. They’d never do something like that.”

“I don’t know, SpongeBob.” Plankton singsongs with a smile, “Sooner or later, they might just ask you if they can carry the spatula themselves.”

“Come on, Plankton, be real.” SpongeBob said in a confident tone. “I trust them as my friends. I know them too well enough for that.” As he spoke, he pats his right pocket that held the golden spatula in question.

When Patrick was walking, he suddenly bumped into a stone wall and stared up at it when he noticed it. “Hey guys,” he turned toward the three. “There’s a strange wall of infinite mass blocking our way.”

“That’s called a mountain, Patrick.” Plankton explained in his friendliest tone. “It was made by nature.”

“Well, this is just great.” Squidward said in disappointment as he removed his hood. “It’s gonna take us days just to get around this thing.”

“Which is why we’re going over it.” Plankton pointed out with an excited grin.

But Squidward was shocked by the idea. “What?!”

SpongeBob didn’t seem too comfortable with the idea either. “I don’t know, Plankton.” He said in a nervous tone as he shifted his feet. “The last time we went through a mountain, that’s when we lost…” tears suddenly began to form in his eyes. “Mr. Krabs…”

Plankton was not amused by this. “You’re not seriously gonna do that every time someone says his name, are you?” he asked deadpanned.

He hopped onto the ground in front of SpongeBob and put on his friendly smile. “Come on, SpongeBob.” He said enthusiastically. “You don’t wanna give up after coming this far just because of some little mountain standing in your way, do you?”

SpongeBob glanced away in uncertainty. “Well…”

“You haven’t forgotten your promise, have you?” he reminded in determination. “You’re gonna help Hoggle…”

“Hoagie.” Squidward dully corrected.

“…You’re gonna help Hoagie get out of that spatula and set free his soul.”

“YEAH!” SpongeBob shouted in joy as he regained his smile. “I won’t give up on Hoagie! We’re gonna climb that mountain!”

“Yay!” Plankton cheered with a joyous grin.

“Now that’s more like it, SpongeBob!” Patrick said in excitement and turned back to the wall. “You hear that mountain? We’re gonna climb you and we’re not gonna stop!”

And at that, Patrick grabbed a hold of a ledge and began climbing his way up. SpongeBob ran over to the wall and watched his best friend climb. “Patrick, wait up!”

But Patrick would not stop climbing and just kept grabbing all the free ledges and used them as support for his hands and feet, letting small rocks and pebbles slide down below. However, Patrick wasn’t used to physical exercise like this and he began to slow down and pant in exhaustion as he tired out.

SpongeBob bellowed out to him, “Patrick, are you okay up there?!”

As Patrick panted and sweat in exhaustion, his grip on the mountain loosened and he fell backwards. SpongeBob screamed for the safety of his friend- but this was greatly exaggerated…Patrick had only climbed four feet up the mountain and fell down with a soft flop.

SpongeBob immediately rushed over to his best friend and knelt down beside him as he took a canteen out of his bag. “There, there, buddy.” He said in a comforting tone as he held the back of Patrick’s head before he bit the cork off the canteen with his teeth and began giving Patrick water. “I got ya.”

Squidward walked over to them. “Well, that just proves we’re never gonna get to the Arctic at this rate. Let’s just go around.”

“Wait!” Plankton yelled as he walked over. “We have to go over the mountain. Otherwise…it could take us longer than expected just to make it before winter rolls around.”

Squidward stared at him in disbelief. But Plankton continued on, “Trust me, I did a bit of mountain climbing in my day. If anyone can get us up this mountain, it’s me. Do you have a bit of rope on you, Squidward?”

Squidward complied and took off his travel pack and reached inside until he pulled out a long piece of rope. Plankton ran off with it and ran around Patrick, tying one end of the rope around his body.

“Are we playing Secret Agent?” Patrick asked with a smile. “I love that game.”

“No, you dim-witted buffoon.” Plankton answered. “This is a tool that groups of professional mountain climbers use. We all tie a string of rope to ourselves that way if one of us loses grip, we won’t fall to our death.”

SpongeBob gulped at the thought of it. “Are you sure it’s safe up there, Plankton?” he asked in a small voice.

“Of course I’m sure.” Plankton said on the edge of losing his patience. “Now let’s go already before I lose more than my grip.”

He tossed the rope to SpongeBob and walked off ahead. After which, Squidward walked over and snatched the rope away and tied it around his waist. “Let’s just get this over with.”

Soon, the four were all tied together and began to make their way up the mountain. This became one instant where SpongeBob was thankful he had fingers, or trying to grab hold of the slippery ledge would be more difficult than it already was. Squidward did the same as he followed behind SpongeBob, his forehead sweating as he held Patrick at the same time, who was hanging by the rope, swinging back and forth in enjoyment.

“That’s it.” Plankton said as he sat atop SpongeBob’s head, “Just a little further, boys.”

After they climbed half-way up the mountain, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward began to slowly walk alongside the ledge on the side of the mountain with their backs firmly against the wall as they inch their way across. Squidward desperately tried to keep his eyes upward in an attempt to not look down at the long drop below.

An hour later, the group went through a short tunnel going through the mountain. When they exited the tunnel, they came out onto a large stable ledge which Patrick collapsed on. SpongeBob went over to help him up.

“SpongeBob,” Patrick said as he looked up. “I’m tired and hungry.”

“I know, Patrick. I am too.” SpongeBob responded in a low tone as he held his best friend. “Maybe we should rest here for a while.”

“For once, I agree with you.” Squidward said before turning his head to look out at the darkening sky. “Let’s just rest here and get some sleep.”

Plankton didn’t seem thrilled with the idea, but after taking into consideration that the ones who actually did the climbing should try and get their energy back for the rest of the way, he eventually agreed.

SpongeBob flopped on his back and stared up at the gloomy gray sky which clashed with his usual optimistic smile that was now on his face along with the cold gray stone that surrounded him.

He rested his arms behind his head and folded his legs to try and relax for a bit. “Hey guys?” he asked, trying to start up a conversation. “What are we all gonna do once we get back home to Bikini Bottom?”

“What are you saying, SpongeBob?” Patrick asked curiously as he went over to SpongeBob and sat by him.

“Well, I was thinking…Once we free Hoagie’s soul and return home, do you think we’ll be praised by everyone as heroes for all the hard work we’ve done?”

“Wow,” Patrick said amazed. “I hadn’t even thought of that.”

Then Squidward entered their conversation. “As much as I myself think I deserve that, all we’re doing is throwing a spatula into a volcano. There’s nothing heroic about it.”

“Aww man.” Patrick groaned and lowered his head in disappointment. “I wanted to be a hero.”

SpongeBob placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay, Patrick. You’ll always be a hero to me. In fact, I think we’re all heroes for the favor we’re all doing for Hoagie.” Patrick brightened up a bit at this. “So tell me, Pat. What are you gonna do once we get back?”

“Oh, you know,” Patrick easily answered. “I’m gonna eat a sandwich, sleep in bed, and send Clarice another pen.”

“Wow, that’s fascinating.” SpongeBob said with a smile. “Maybe you should ‘add an exciting day of jellyfishing with your best friend’ to that list. After all, who could forget the miraculous encounter we had with a certain jellyfish a couple days ago?”

He and Patrick share a laugh while Squidward did his best to ignore them and eat some bread he pulled out of Patrick’s fridge. But it wasn’t long till SpongeBob decided to invite him in anyway.

“Hey Squidward,” SpongeBob called as he sat up to face him. “What are you gonna do once we get back home.”

Squidward swallowed a piece of the bread and turned his head toward the two. “Well, if you must know,” he began answering. “The first thing I’m gonna do is take a bath in order to wash this filth of the wilderness off of my skin, and then go back to living the horrible life I’m forced to endure every day.”

SpongeBob giggled innocently at this. “You must be itching to get back now.” Then he turned to his other side to see Plankton leaning against the stone wall, minding his own business. “How about you, Plankton? What are gonna do?”

“Me?” Plankton asked until he thought about it and smiled. “Why, I’ll be running a successful restaurant known as the Chum Bucket, serving irresistible food which no mortal can’t help but enjoy, all the while plowing the Krusty Krab out of business.”

He finished off with an evil laugh, not realizing that SpongeBob had stopped listening and got a look of concern on his face.

“That’s right…” the sponge said as he lied back down. “Now that Mr. Krabs is gone, what’s gonna happen to the Krusty Krab?”

“Who cares?” Squidward said as he placed his travel pack on the ground and lied on top of it. “It’ll either be run by someone else or shut down. And if we’re lucky, it’ll be the latter.”

He faced his back toward SpongeBob and went to sleep, but SpongeBob lied on the ground, looking even more concerned about the future than he already did. “But that can’t possibly be the end. Going back home and never making krabby patties again. I just can’t live with that.”

“Don’t worry, SpongeBob.” Patrick said with his eyes closed as if he were about to fall asleep any second. “That can be something else we can do once we get back home…. Think of a way…to…” but before he could finish, he started snoring loudly, now fast asleep.

SpongeBob couldn’t really guess what Patrick was gonna suggest that would help solve his problem. But knowing Patrick like he did, it was probably something that would truly help him. Afterwards, SpongeBob yawned and closed his eyes to get some well-deserved sleep before they had to start another hike over the mountain.

“Oh, don’t worry, SpongeBob.” Plankton said sinisterly as he rested against the wall, far from the group. “Maybe if you do the right thing and give me the spatula, you can come work for me and help the spatula cook dozens of krabby patties to make me successful.”

He gave one more evil chuckle before closing his eye and going to sleep with a confident grin.

[Sauce Mama]

Oh gosh I love this story! Great job can't wait to hear more!

[NegiSpongie]

[align=center][align=center]Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

Chapter 16: High Tension Waters[/align]

[/align]

Later in the early evening (sky was still gray so it was hard to tell), Plankton had opened his eye and sat up to see SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward still asleep by the ledge of the cliff. Plankton smirked and quietly snuck over to Patrick’s mini fridge.

“Time for Plan: Separate-Idiot-From-Idiots.” Plankton said to himself as he opened the fridge to see SpongeBob’s three krabby patties sitting inside.

He pulled them out and struggled to carry all three at the same time. He wobbled over to the edge of the cliff and suddenly dropped them over the ledge.

“Phew,” Plankton sighed in exhaustion as he stared at the patties drop down out of sight. “In all my years of work, I never thought the day would come when I’d have to do something like that. But soon, it’ll all be worth it.” He smirked as he pulled out a chunk of lettuce. “Now to set the crumb.”

He quietly snuck over to Squidward and carefully planted the lettuce on his cloak. Afterwards, Squidward yawned and stretched as he woke up while Plankton stood there with an innocent-looking grin as he placed his hands behind his back. He sat up looking sleep-eyed as he looked around. “What time is it?”

SpongeBob and Patrick woke up as well with the sponge jumping up as he stretched his arms out in an enthusiastic way. “What a good sleep.” He said cheerfully. “It’s true what they say about the outdoors.”

Patrick then got SpongeBob’s attention, “SpongeBob, I’m hungry. Can we eat breakfast?”

“Sure thing,” SpongeBob nodded as he ran over to the fridge. “I’ll get us something.”

While Squidward gathered his things and Plankton quietly chuckled in delight, SpongeBob opened up the fridge and immediately noticed something out of sorts. “Hey, guys!” he called out. “Where are the krabby patties I made the other day?”

“How should I know?” Squidward answered. “It wasn’t my job to watch them.”

Patrick walked over to SpongeBob as he tossed everything out of the fridge to search for them. “Are you sure they’re not just invisible?” Patrick asked.

“Of course I’m sure.” SpongeBob answered franticly as he held the empty fridge up and shook it before tossing it aside. “This isn’t happening!” he shouted in panic. “Where could they have gone?” he turned to Patrick and grabbed his cloak. “You didn’t eat them, did you?”

“I don’t know, did I?” Patrick asked, looking worried as he held his head. “What if I did? Is that bad?” but to answer his question, they both heard his stomach growl, showing that he hadn’t eaten anything in a while.

But this made SpongeBob panic even more. “Oh no! What happened to them? This is an emergency!”

“SpongeBob, will you relax?” Squidward said as he approached them. “This isn’t a big deal! The only emergency here is that you just tossed all our food onto the soiled ground.”

“Squidward!” SpongeBob called out as he grabbed his shirt. “You haven’t seen them, have you?”

“I already said I didn’t!” Squidward shouted as he pushed SpongeBob off of him. “Now shut up and let’s get moving.”

“He’s right, SpongeBob.” Plankton said as he walked up to them. “As terrible as this is, we have to get moving. It’ll get late if we don’t-” but then he suddenly got a stunned look. “Wait a minute!” he pointed at Squidward. “What is that?!”

“What?” Squidward asked as he looked on his cloak to see something green and leafy on it. “Eww, what is that?”

SpongeBob pulled it off and began sniffing it. He narrowed his eyes and answered, “Lettuce…from one krabby patty.” He angrily tossed it on the ground and pointed an accusing finger at Squidward. “So it was you!”

“Me?!” Squidward yelled in response. “Why would I eat your precious krabby patties?”

“I saw the way you were looking at them back in the village!” SpongeBob explained in a frenzied voice that sounded almost mad. “You were jealous that I kept them for us! Yeah, for me and Hoagie.” Then he eyes filled with tears as he took the spatula out of his pocket and he began to gently stroke it. “And you ate them when they should’ve been cherished for their beauty and innocence.”

“I guess that was pretty mean of Squidward, huh SpongeBob?” Patrick spoke up.

But SpongeBob turned to Patrick and lashed out at him as well. “Don’t talk to me like that, Patrick Star! I saw you acting the same way as well! You wanted those patties just as much as he did and you were plotting to take them until Squidward beat you to it!”

Patrick was so hurt by SpongeBob’s harsh words that his eyes began to water. “I was?” his lips quivered as tears dropped down his eyes. “Oh, I should’ve known. You have every right to be mad at me, SpongeBob.”

But Squidward crossed his arms and yelled at the sponge. “Barnacles, SpongeBob, have you lost your mind?”

“There you go again, pretending like you don’t know anything!” SpongeBob continued shouting at his two best friends. “I know the truth! You never appreciated me or handled krabby patties the way they deserved to be handled!” then he again stroked the spatula. “There, there, my precious Hoagie. Our patties are all gone thanks to him, but we can make more, can we? Yeah, that’s right.”

Squidward was disturbed at the sight he was seeing. But then, he decided that enough was enough with SpongeBob’s abnormal behavior. “That’s it!” he shouted before extending his tentacle to SpongeBob. “Give me the spatula.”

“What?!” SpongeBob asked in shock as he stared at Squidward.

“You heard me!” Squidward responded impatiently as he kept his tentacle out at SpongeBob. “Give me the spatula and I’ll carry it the rest of the way.”

Suddenly, SpongeBob’s eyes widen in horror as he remembered Plankton’s warning to him from the previous day. He shook his head clear and glared furiously at Squidward as he held the spatula from his view. “No!” he shouted childishly.

“Don’t make me take it from you!” Squidward warned as he inched closer to SpongeBob.

“No!” SpongeBob shouted once again. “I’m Hoagie’s keeper! And Mr. Krabs trusted me to carry it the whole way!”

“Mr. Krabs isn’t here anymore! And you don’t deserve to carry it anymore with the way you’ve been acting! Now give it here!” he quickly grabbed a hold of the spatula, and once he did, he became even more angry than ever and growled furiously at SpongeBob. “You’re spoiled, that’s what you are! You waste all your time doting over disgusting junk food!”

SpongeBob tugged the spatula towards himself and shouted back in the same manner. “You’re wrong! Krabby patties are the greatest thing in the sea! And you’re in a barnacle heap of wrong if you think I’m gonna let you talk that way about ‘em!”

“Oh…Look who finally grew a vertebrae!” Squidward spat as he tugged the spatula his way. “You wouldn’t know art if it hit you in the face! Unlike my own which are complete works of gold!”

“Krabby patties are gold!” SpongeBob yelled after tugging the spatula.

“It’s nothing compared to the wonderful joy of my clarinet!” Squidward shouted after tugging the spatula. “I can enchant the minds, unlike you who never even appreciated anything I do!”

SpongeBob grunted as he tried as hard as he could to pull the spatula from Squidward’s grip, “Because you never appreciated me or anything Hoagie and I do!”

Squidward did the same as he yelled, “Hoagie doesn’t deserve to be carried by you, grease-fryer sea monkey!”

“Mean musician man!” SpongeBob yelled back.

Squidward again tugged on the spatula. “Annoying little loofa!

“Big cranky cephalopod!” SpongeBob yelled as he tugged the spatula his way.

The two continued trading insults while fighting over the spatula. However, it was apparent by some mysterious way that each time SpongeBob and Squidward tugged the spatula their way; they somehow knew just what insult to call the other. But this did not dawn on either of them since they were too blinded by their greed and anger.

“Sandwich-loving hole-filled little brat!”

“Suction-cup big-nose painter!”

Patrick and Plankton watched the whole thing from afar. Plankton seemed to be enjoying watching the conflict go down, but Patrick seemed rather bothered by it.

Squidward began to tug on the spatula harder that it almost lifted SpongeBob off his feet, “Give me that spatula, you good for nothing vile cheesehead!”

But SpongeBob retaliated by using all his strength to drop back on the ground and tug the spatula away, “Never, you smelly inky slimy calamari-butt!”

Afterwards, SpongeBob and Squidward growled and raised their fist at each other which then led to violent fighting. They rolled around on the ground, punching, kicking, and shouting at each other as they tried taking the spatula from each other. Plankton giggled in excitement as he watched SpongeBob and Squidward in their dust cloud of brawl. But Patrick suddenly frowned in anger and marched over to them.

He stopped right next to them and yelled at the top of his voice, “STOP IT!!!”

Suddenly, the two froze in place with SpongeBob grabbing Squidward’s nose and Squidward pulling SpongeBob by his tie, and both their free hand grasped onto the spatula. They both were glancing up at Patrick, surprised to see him intervening.

“You guys shouldn’t be fighting.” Patrick calmly explained to the two. “You’re supposed to be friends. Even though it’s true that Squidward never appreciates the krabby patties SpongeBob makes, and SpongeBob never appreciates Squidward’s art and clarinet playing; that doesn’t matter. What really matters is deciding who’s carrying the spatula by feuding over your differences and deciding whose personal prized possession is more important and should be treated with more respect.”

If Patrick’s speech was supposed to help matters, it certainly didn’t; because SpongeBob and Squidward growled at each other once again and went right back to fighting over the spatula and shouting insults and swears at each other as they rolled away on the ground from their fight.

During the fight, SpongeBob grabbed a hold of Squidward’s right arm and bit down on it with his buckteeth, causing him to loosen his grip on the spatula, “Ow!” he cried out in pain as SpongeBob took the opportunity to seize the spatula.

When SpongeBob got up and ran away with the spatula, a scuffed up Squidward stood up and held his arm. “You little savage!” he shouted angrily at SpongeBob. “You bit me!”

“You made me do it, Squidward.” SpongeBob responded agitatedly, looking scuffed up from the fight as well. “You betrayed me and tried to steal Hoagie from me! You monster…”

“You’re the monster, SquarePants!” Squidward shouted, pointing a tentacle at him. “You’ve changed ever since we went on this stupid journey! And all I know is that I’m through with going any further to destroy that spatula!”

“Fine then!” SpongeBob yelled back. “I don’t need you! I can get to the Arctic myself!”

“But what about me, SpongeBob?” Patrick asked, looking bemused. “Don’t you mean ‘myself and me’?”

“No, Patrick,” SpongeBob bitterly said, turning away. “I’m going the rest of the way only by myself. You can just go back home.”

Patrick began to cry again. “But…but…”

SpongeBob ignored his best friend’s crying and turned to Plankton and spoke in an uncharacteristically cold voice, “Plankton…would you mind showing me the rest of the way to the Arctic?”

“Not at all, SpongeBob, my friend.” Plankton responded in a friendly tone. “Let’s get going.”

SpongeBob pocketed the spatula and grabbed his knapsack before following Plankton further up the mountain, not even taking one more glance at his two former companions before disappearing out of sight.

Squidward huffed and turned in the opposite direction to begin his long journey back home. Patrick turned to see Squidward grab his stuff before heading down the mountain, and then looked back toward the direction that SpongeBob left. He bowed his head and moaned sadly at the fact of losing his best friend forever and hurt by the unkind words he had said.

[NegiSpongie]

Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

Chapter 17: Shocking Betrayal

An hour later after SpongeBob separated from his friends and went with Plankton to continue his journey to the Arctic Ocean, the sponge was struggling as hard as he could to climb up cliffs and keep himself balanced over ledges. The only thing that could make it harder was if it rained- but SpongeBob refused to say it as if it would tempt fate.

When SpongeBob climbed close to the top of the mountain, Plankton jumped off of SpongeBob’s head and onto the ledge as the sponge climbed up and flopped on the ground.

“Nice job, SpongeBob.” Plankton said with an encouraging smile. “We made it.”

“…Great.” SpongeBob said with an exhausted tone.

“Now all we have to do is cross this cave over to the other side and we’ll be closer than ever before.”

“I don’t know, Plankton.” SpongeBob said nervously. “Last time I went through a cave was when we lost Mr. Krabs. The last thing I’d wanna do is lose another friend.”

“Don’t worry, SpongeBob.” Plankton assured. “Those two idiots aren’t here to slow you down anymore.”

SpongeBob wasn’t sure if what Plankton said was supposed to make him feel better or not, but the singe-cell organism went on, “The only way down is to cross this cave. I’ll bet it’s as safe in there as anything can get.”

“Well…okay.” SpongeBob put on a determined look. “I’ll do it.”

He began to march his way toward the cave while Plankton waved to him. “I’ll be right behind you all the way, SpongeBob.” But once SpongeBob was out of earshot, Plankton chuckled evilly. “Let’s just hope this Eli person is enough to get SpongeBob to drop that spatula.”

Meanwhile, Squidward was carefully making his way down the mountain in order to start his long road home. However, he missed his step and ended up falling on his face when trying to slide down.

Squidward groaned in pain as he stood up, but then angrily grunted, still fuming over what had happened earlier. “Little ingrate…” he mumbled as he continued onward. “I waste a whole week of my life helping him on this journey from heck and what do I get?” then he turned around to notice someone missing, “Patrick, hurry up or I’ll leave you behind! And I will!”

“Sorry,” Patrick said as he walked over, now eating something. “I was still pretty hungry.”

But Squidward quickly noticed something familiar about what he was eating. “Hey, where did you get that?”

“I found it.” He answered as he took a bite of the slice of meat.

“But that’s a krabby patty. Where could you have possibly gotten a krabby patty from?”

“I found it over there.” Patrick pointed in the direction behind him. “There are a couple other things to eat too.”

Squidward walked over to examine what Patrick was talking about, and he soon noticed a bunch of scattered ingredients like lettuce, tomato, onions, and patty slices. They were the missing krabby patties that SpongeBob was upset about. Squidward soon put two and two together.

He frowned angrily and clenched his fist. “Why, that little…”

Back up the mountain, SpongeBob quietly began to enter the cave and looked around the dark tunnel. SpongeBob crept through and noticed small burn marks on the cave walls and his feet kicked a few small bones on scattered the ground.

As SpongeBob nervously continued his way through the cave, he suddenly tripped and fell on the ground. When he sat up, his eyes widen to see it was a skull of some poor unfortunate passerby.

SpongeBob timidly chuckled and said, “Sorry about that.” Then he quickly got up and continued on his way.

From the darker shadows of the cave, something long slid on the ground slithered quietly toward SpongeBob.

The sponge’s eyes widen as he spotted a charred scallop; and when he touched it with his finger, it suddenly disintegrated. SpongeBob gulped in fright and came to the thought that there really was something living in this cave. But what?

This was answered in a manner of seconds when he heard the noise of a pebble dropping behind him and he spotted a long green eel with sharp teeth in its mouth and red eyes. Sparks of electricity appeared over its body revealing that it was an electric eel.

SpongeBob screamed as the eel swung its tail at him, but the sponge quickly dove on the ground and rolled away. The eel snarled and lit its body with electricity as it tried to grab SpongeBob in order to shock him.

He quickly jumped into a corner and backed against the wall, trying to remain as hidden as possible. SpongeBob held his knees close to his chest and shivered in terror. “First snakeheads, now electric eels…WHAT KIND OF OCEAN IS THIS?!?!”

He then noticed the eel’s tail once again trying to strike him around the corner with electricity generating on it. SpongeBob screamed and quickly jumped out of the way of the strike.

From outside the cave, Plankton noticed the flashes of light coming from the inside. “I better go see if SpongeBob is out of the picture yet.”

He walks in and notices SpongeBob franticly trying to dodge the strikes of the eel known to most as ‘Eli’ around these parts. His eye widens at the sight of it. “I don’t believe it…” he grew a joyful smile. “She’s better than I dreamed!”

As SpongeBob ran from wall to wall of the cave to avoid the strike of Eli, he cried out, “Plankton! Help me!”

“Don’t worry, SpongeBob, I’ll help you!” Plankton responded, “Right after I help myself to that spatula when you’re eel chow!”

SpongeBob continued to dodge the attacks of Eli. He had no idea why Plankton refused to help him. Was he planning all along to steal Hoagie’s spatula? When SpongeBob was running, he tripped on a rock and fell to the ground, which caused the spatula to fall out of his pocket. Eli swung her tail at SpongeBob as it charged with electricity. But SpongeBob quickly grabbed the spatula and blocked the swing.

This was a mistake. The electricity traveled down the metal of the spatula and down SpongeBob’s arm, zapping his entire body. He shrieked in pain and dropped the spatula, cutting off the electricity. He panted heavily almost as if he had been wrung dry.

When SpongeBob bent down and picked up the spatula, Eli grabbed him by his knapsack lifted him up into the air. SpongeBob flailed his arms and screamed, presumably about to be eaten. But then, he calmed down, and thinking quickly, tossed the spatula at a rock pile and caused it to roll across the ground trampling Eli and causing her to drop him on the ground.

SpongeBob got up and saw the eel had fallen unconscious. He hesitantly picked up his knapsack and pocketed the spatula before slowly walking out of the cave while dragging his bag across the floor.

Once SpongeBob had gone, Plankton ran over to the unconscious Eli and started shouting in her face, “Wake up, you buffoon! You’re letting him get away with my spatula!”

At this, Eli opens her eyes and gives a deadly glare, alarming Plankton, who backs away in response.

Meanwhile, SpongeBob had finally exited the cave, still looking worn out from the struggle with Eli, and was still dragging his knapsack across the ground without care. He stopped for a moment and took in the fresh breeze. Then he turned his head to the left and noticed that the mountain had a smooth-looking trail that could take him to the bottom of the other side he needed to go.

SpongeBob sighed and grew a warm smile. “Despite that little turmoil of death, I guess it’ll be smooth sailing from now on.”

As he began to blissfully walk toward the trail, he failed to notice from the shadows in the cave, a light of sparkling electricity lit up to reveal Eli now back on her metaphorical feet.

SpongeBob continued to happily march toward his destination, not noticing Eli slithering over to him with killing intent in mind. However, when SpongeBob did notice- it was far too late.

Eli wrapped her tail around SpongeBob and lifted him off the ground; and once he was in her coils, she gave a long painful zap of electricity to SpongeBob, who gave a muffled shriek.

“Whoa,” Plankton said in awe as he watched the whole thing from the entrance of the cave.

After Eli finally finished electrocuting SpongeBob, the sponge was now charred and smoking as he closed his eyes and slipped out of consciousness.

Eli began to move her sharp teeth close to SpongeBob, about to eat him. But this was interrupted when a pink flash appeared in front of her. It was Patrick, who was clamped onto Eli’s mouth refusing to let go.

“What the Davy!” Plankton shouted in surprise.

The eel swung her head back and forth in an attempt to throw the starfish off. But Patrick refused to let of and grunted fiercely as he shouted, “I won’t let you eat my best friend!”

All of Patrick’s interference caused Eli to release SpongeBob, letting him fall flat on his face onto the ground. Eli slithered backwards blindly as Patrick refused to let go, but then she lit her body with electricity that finally caused Patrick to release his grip. The eel snarled at Patrick, about to exact revenge, but Patrick grabbed the mini-fridge off his back and smacked the eel across the face with it, pushing it off the cliff and off of the high mountain.

This didn’t stop Patrick from looking off from the cliff and shouting after it, “And don’t ever let me catch you trying to eat SpongeBob again!”

After witnessing the whole event, Plankton stood there by the cave entrance, looking dumbfounded as he slumped over, “Well, I didn’t expect this to stop me from getting that spatula this time.”

Then he noticed Squidward running past him from out of the cave, which the single-cell quickly hid behind a rock to avoid being seen. Squidward spotted SpongeBob’s blackened body lying on the ground and quickly rushed over to him. He turned SpongeBob over on his back and noticed he was still unconscious.

“SpongeBob?” Squidward called as he shook him. “SpongeBob, wake up!”

At this, SpongeBob’s eyelids twitch and he suddenly coughed out a puff of black smoke before opening his eyes half-way. “…Squidward?” he spoke in a raspy dry voice.

“SpongeBob!” Patrick shouted as he ran over to him. “That eel tried to eat you. But don’t worry. Ol’ Patrick taught him a lesson. I wish you had been awake to see it.”

“…Patrick.” SpongeBob spoke again. “…You guys came back for me.”

Squidward replied, “Well, I’m sure you’re aware by now that you’ve been duped by Plankton himself.”

“Yeah,” Patrick nodded. “But since we’re all here, we can go to the Arctic together again.”

But suddenly, SpongeBob took a large gasp for breath and didn’t seem like he would be standing up anytime soon. “SpongeBob!” Squidward shouted in worry. “Are you okay?”

“I…I…don’t know.” SpongeBob said between breaths. “But…But please forgive me.” He grabbed onto Squidward’s tentacle. “I…I…don’t know why I said all that stuff before. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry, SpongeBob.” Patrick said with a smile. “We forgive you. We’re not even mad.”

“That’s great…” SpongeBob said with a weak smile before taking another gasp for breath. “…Cuz I don’t think I’m gonna make it to the Arctic.”

“What?” Squidward asked in shock. “But what about all that stuff you said about being an important journey, and fulfilling your promise to Mr. Krabs and for Hoagie, and all that other nonsense you said that I wasn’t paying attention to?”

“And what about all the stuff we’re gonna do once we get back home?” Patrick asked, now looking depressed.

“I’m sorry…” SpongeBob said, now panting even more. “Take care of Gary for me, and tell…Hoagie…that…I’m…”

And just like that, SpongeBob closed his eyes and fell to the ground, no longer breathing. “SpongeBob?” Patrick asked with tears in his eyes.

Squidward even began to cry over the loss of SpongeBob. “How dare you go like this!” He shouted while sobbing. “How dare you drag me out here, make go through treacherous things, and then leave me stuck out here; you stupid barnacle head!”

Then he stood up and turned away, slumping over. “Come on, Patrick. Let’s go.”

Patrick stood up and began to follow Squidward, sadly looking at his deceased friend one last time before catching up to him. When the two were about to go back through the cave, they heard footsteps approaching from behind and quickly hid behind a large boulder to see who it was.

From out of the mountain trail, came three large green frogs, wearing armor plates and leather, and all looking very unfriendly to approach. One of them noticed the dried up SpongeBob on the ground and approached him.

“What do you make of this?” he asked as he poked SpongeBob with a long stick as if he were road kill.

The second approached him as well, staring at the lifeless sponge. “He looks dead. We should probably clean up the mess then.”

The last frog (who unlike the other two had a left glass eye) inspected the cave from outside. “It don’t look like Eli’s in here. I’m guessing that one must’ve had a run in with her.”

“It looks like Eli got the last hit on this little piece of cheese.” The first frog pointed out as he kicked SpongeBob with his webbed feet.

“Let’s sweep him off the mountain side.” The second frog suggested again.

“Wait just a minute!” the third frog demanded as he approached SpongeBob, and then spit out his long tongue and ran it across SpongeBob’s face before pulling it back in. “Just as I suspected. This one is a sea sponge. He should count his blessings for it after running into her.”

“What’re you talking about, Kip?” the second frog asked in an annoyed tone.

The third frog, apparently named Kip, continued to explain, “Bein’ that he’s a sponge, her shock had wrung him out dry. If it were anyone else, they’d be dead right now. Once this one’s body has reabsorbed all the moisture around him, he’ll be waking up in about an hour or so.”

From behind the boulder, Squidward and Patrick’s eyes widen at this, before ducking their heads down in order to avoid being seen.

“So what do we do with him then?” the first frog asked.

“Let’s bring him with us.” The Kip answered. “He’s bound to have something valuable on him that we can make money off of; and once he’s woken up, he’ll probably make a great stew.”

Kip began to walk back down the mountain trail while the second held SpongeBob’s knapsack, and the first frog carried SpongeBob in his long tongue, hoisting him in the air.

Once the frogs were out of sight, the two contemplate on what they just heard. “Brrr…” Squidward shuddered as he held his arms. “I hate frogs. They’re nothing but slimy, wart-carrying, disease-ridden creatures.”

“I like their tongues.” Patrick said and attempted to mimic the frogs’ long stretchy tongues.

“Well, at least we know SpongeBob is still alive- yet at the mercy of those horrible putrid frogs.” Squidward sighed and slumped. “And with the spatula in his hands, there’s no doubt those frogs are gonna keep it for themselves.”

“That’s weird.” Patrick said as he reached into his pocket. “Cuz I have it right here.”

He pulled out none other than the golden spatula, much to Squidward’s surprise. “What? When did you get that thing?”

“I took it from SpongeBob after he died. I thought we can finish the quest and destroy the spatula ourselves.”

“Yeah…great idea. Just be careful with that thing.” Squidward took a step away from the spatula. “There’s something about it that’s dangerous. When I held it last, it made me feel…odd.”

But Patrick stared at the spatula with a blank look. “I don’t feel anything. But it is making my head tickle.” He chuckled dimly. “It’s funny!”

Squidward sighed and walked ahead. “Well, I suppose we should get to the Arctic and get rid of that thing before it influences anyone else with a brain.”

“But wait. Are we gonna go get SpongeBob from those frogs?”

“Well, what can we do?” Squidward asked as he glared at Patrick. “I said I hate frogs. And I’m sure as heck not gonna go marching to their place when there could be more of them waiting.”

“But they said they were gonna have SpongeBob make a stew!” Patrick cried out. “And SpongeBob doesn’t like stew!”

As Patrick continued to cry over the oblivious danger his best friend was in, Squidward grunted in annoyance and finally said, “Fine! I guess I do owe that little twerp one anyway.” He began to walk down the mountain trail where the frogs headed. “Alright, Patrick, let’s get that idiot out of yet another predicament he’s gotten himself into.”

“Yay!” Patrick cheered as he followed Squidward. “We’re gonna be heroes again!”

But from the entrance of the cave, Plankton emerged from his hiding place with a furious look on his face. “I’ll get that precious spatula…” he growled through his teeth. “…If it’s the last thing I do.”

[TJ]

Awesome Episode!

[NegiSpongie]

Keeper of the Spatula

Chapter 18: Hop to It

Soon, dusk fell in the grey emotionless sky which seemed to very much match the large dark castle that was set in a swampy-looking area. Inside the castle, SpongeBob was lying on the ground on his side, still unconscious but the yellow seemed to return to his skin. He then began to open his blue eyes and yawned.

“I really needed that nap.” He said with a little smile until he noticed the predicament he was in.

His wrists and ankles were tied to together with chains; and his knapsack, cloak, shoes, socks, and Krusty Krab hat were missing- save for his pants.

“What’s going on? Where am I?” SpongeBob asked as he sat up to notice that he was in some type of dark scary dungeon with only one wooden door that had small bars on the window that let in only a little bit of light.

He then saw a shadow blocking the light from outside and noticed the door creeping open. He gasped quietly, and two of the same frogs that captured him stepped inside. They see SpongeBob lying back on the ground, supposedly still unconscious.

“When do you wreckin’ he’ll wake up, Kip?” the frog asked his partner.

The glass-eyed frog named ‘Kip’ answered in a cool sinister voice, “It must be pretty soon. He may have mostly useless valuables, but he should at least make a fine meal once he’s awakened.”

The other frog laughed. “I can’t wait to see the look on his face once he finds out. He’ll be so terrified!”

The frogs then went back out the door and shut it closed. On the ground, SpongeBob’s face was indeed full of terror that his eyes were practically bugging out. He’s probably never been so scared in his whole life.

Outside the castle, Patrick and Squidward were hiding behind a large boulder to avoid being seen by anyone who may be keeping guard near the castle.

“Alright, SpongeBob’s inside that place.” Squidward pointed out to Patrick. “How are we supposed to get in and get him out?”

“Oh, I know.” Patrick said with a confident smile. “We go up to the castle, knock on the door, and when they open it, we run in, grab SpongeBob, and run outside.”

Squidward frowned dully. “Is there any plan to be covert or even undercover in that strategy?”

Patrick scratched his chin in thought. “No. I don’t think it involves blankets.”

“Forget it,” Squidward said as he stood up and walked away. “Let’s just do this the old-fashioned way and pray to Neptune that we don’t get caught.”

“I like that plan.” Patrick gleefully said as he followed Squidward.

Soon afterwards, both Patrick and Squidward left their baggage outside and snuck in through the window of the castle. Squidward carefully softened his footsteps as he stepped on the ground. But when Patrick climbed through the window, he fell flat on his face with a loud thud.

“Get up, you incompetent idiot.” Squidward quietly scolded. “Are you trying to get us caught?”

But then, they heard tapping sounds coming from down the hallway. Squidward panics and pushes Patrick towards a door. “Quick, let’s hide in here.”

He pushes Patrick into the closet and quickly shuts the door. A frog walks past the door and looks around as if he heard something. But he shrugs his shoulders and assumes it’s nothing and keeps walking.

Once the frog was out of sight, Squidward and Patrick crept out of the closet. “Let’s just find SpongeBob and get out of here.” The octopus quickly said.

As the two walk down the hall to look for SpongeBob, Squidward saw that the hall divided into three which made it difficult to know which way to go. “Oh great,” Squidward shouted in annoyance. “He can be in any of these directions.”

“Hey, look at this.” Patrick pointed as he ran down the far right hall and picked up a green cloak on the floor.

Squidward walked over and stared at it curiously. “This looks like the cloaks we have that the mermaids gave us. The only other person who has one like this is SpongeBob.” Squidward stared down the hallway where Patrick found it. “And it looks like he could be down this way.”

They walked down the hall and came into a large room. Squidward quickly backed Patrick against the wall when he spotted a pair of frogs inside. One of them was holding SpongeBob’s knapsack. He reached inside and pulled out a pair of white underwear.

“Useless,” he tossed it aside and pulled out a book. “‘Wonderful World of Jellyfish’? Worthless!” he tossed it aside as well and took out a small photograph which was a picture of Sandy Cheeks. “What is this? A rodent? Nothing but junk!” he tossed it aside and it flew into a lit torch disintegrating instantly.

“This sponge doesn’t have anything valuable we can get rich off of.” The second frog said as he held SpongeBob’s Krusty Krab hat.”

He too tossed it aside and the hat landed in front of Patrick and Squidward. The frog then held SpongeBob’s socks and shoes. “But his footwear does look like it can fetch a few doubloons.”

The frog ransacking SpongeBob’s knapsack then pulled out a bottle of bubble soap. “Interesting.” He said. “Bubbles are worth millions around these parts.”

“Bubbles?!” the second frog exclaimed as he dropped his stuff and grabbed a hold of the bottle. “Gimme ‘em! I should be the one to sell them!”

“NO!” the frog refused to let go as he and his partner fought over the bubble soap.

As Squidward and Patrick watched this, Squidward looked at the far corner of the room to see a wooden door with bars on the window. He quietly signaled Patrick and they crawled on the floor to sneak past the fighting frogs.

Squidward slowly stood up and creaked the door open as he peeked inside to see SpongeBob alone in the dark room, laying on his side with his back turned. But then, Patrick barged in and shouted happily, “SpongeBob!”

Once he heard this, SpongeBob immediately sat up and turned to them with his eyes red and puffy from all the crying he had been doing. “Patrick, Squidward, is that really you?”

Patrick ran over and hugged him tightly. “Oh, SpongeBob, we thought you were gonna have to eat stew with those mean frogs!”

SpongeBob would’ve returned his hug if not for the chains restricting his wrists. “I was scared too, Patrick.” He said as he cried again. “…I thought I’d never see you again.”

Squidward knelt down to him, and after which, SpongeBob flung himself into his arms. “Those frogs said they were gonna kill me!” he cried into Squidward’s chest. “…And that they were gonna cook me into something called ‘fly stew’!”

As the sponge cried and cried in distress, Squidward, for once, decided pat SpongeBob on the head and offer him comfort. “There, there, SpongeBob.” He said in a voice that didn’t seem to enjoy doing this, but tried to be a bit sincere, “It’ll all be over soon. Let’s just get out of here before anyone sees us.”

SpongeBob sat up and calmed down a bit. “Okay…But what’ll we do now? Those frogs took the spatula. We can’t go to the Arctic anymore.”

“No they didn’t.” Patrick said as he reached into his pocket. “I have the spatula right here.” He held out the spatula, and then showed SpongeBob he had his cloak and uniform hat. “I also found some of your stuff.”

SpongeBob smiled at this and seemed to have his happiness back. “Oh, Patrick, you’re the best best friend anyone could ever have.” He again tried to stand up and hug Patrick, but his wrists and ankles were still chained together. “If only I could get these things off.”

“Hang on,” Squidward said as he reached behind him. “I have some lotion in my backpocket.”

As Squidward took out a bottle of lotion, SpongeBob took this moment to ask, “You brought a bottle of lotion with you?”

“Of course I did.” Squidward snapped back. “How else do you think I’ve been keeping my body sanitized this whole time?”

Squidward then squeezed drops of lotion on SpongeBob’s wrists and ankles, allowing him to slip them out of the chains. Patrick then gave SpongeBob his cloak, hat, and spatula back. SpongeBob wished that they could’ve brought his shoes and socks back as well, but he wasn’t about to complain about it.

Squidward took the lead once again and peeked outside to see the coast was clear before they snuck out of the dungeon in order to find the exit. SpongeBob kept close to Patrick out of fear as they both followed Squidward.

As they rounded a corner, a voice shouted, “Where do you three think you’re going?”

SpongeBob and Patrick shriek in fright and grab onto each other. Squidward also became nervous as he tried to answer, “We’re just…uhhh…going out there?”

“Oh, you’re not leaving so soon, are you?” he grew a smirk across his slimy lips as he approached them.

The three scream and try to head down the hall, but the frog suddenly jumped in the air and landed in their path. “Going somewhere?” he asked with an evil laugh and a croak.

With no other choice, the three decided to run in the opposite direction while screaming. They ran past the two frogs who were earlier fighting over SpongeBob’s belongings. The two frogs stared when they noticed them until the one chasing shouted, “Don’t just stand there! After them!”

The two frogs immediately stopped what they were doing and chased after SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward. While they were running down a hall, they spotted another hallway up ahead through a doorway, but before they could get to it, one of the frogs shot his long tongue out and it wrapped around SpongeBob’s ankle, causing the sponge to trip forward.

“NO!” SpongeBob cried out as he was dragged across the floor by the evil grinning frog.

Patrick quickly grabbed a hold of SpongeBob’s arms and began to pull him with all his strength. Squidward held the door open and shouted, “Come on! This way!”

The second frog also shot his tongue out and wrapped it around SpongeBob’s other ankle which made it harder for Patrick to keep SpongeBob from being captured.

“Hurry up!” Squidward shouted as he waited by the door.

But Patrick refused to let go of SpongeBob and slowly walked backward while gripping SpongeBob’s arm while the frogs’ tongues were holding SpongeBob’s ankles. Patrick moved through the doorway with SpongeBob, and once the two were inside the room, Squidward slammed the door shut on the frogs’ tongues, and their muffled screams were heard outside the room and their tongues loosened around SpongeBob’s ankles.

SpongeBob made a sickened expression as he sat on the ground and removed the tongues off his ankles. “Eww, thanks guys.” He said to Patrick and Squidward.

“Let’s keep moving.” Squidward immediately said as he marched forward.

Patrick helped SpongeBob back on his feet and followed him. Squidward peeked from behind a corner and glanced at both the left and right path to see no frogs in sight. “Which way do we go now?” Patrick asked.

“I’m not sure.” Squidward answered. “Any of these ways can lead us to those slimy frogs.”

SpongeBob pulled out the spatula from his pocket and noticed it glow for a second. “Wait a second, guys.” He told the two. “I think Hoagie knows which way to go.”

“Put that thing away, SpongeBob!” Squidward demanded in annoyance. “In case you’ve forgotten, that spatula is the reason we’re in this mess.”

But SpongeBob ignored Squidward’s rambling and ran down the right hall. “He knows it’s this way!”

“SpongeBob, get back here, you idiot!” Squidward shouted as he and Patrick ran after him.

Eventually, SpongeBob led his friends into another small room with a stone oven and stove, a table with a bunch of knives and utensils on it and a large kettle pot on top of the stove. It was obviously a kitchen, a very gloomy one at that as it didn’t look like it was cleaned on a regular basis.

“Oh nice…this is very nice.” Squidward sarcastically said with a glare as he looked around. “I was getting hungry anyway. I guess you figured we might as well eat before we’re killed, right?”

"Oh, thank goodness." Patrick said as he walked over to a counter and picked up a large ladle and took a spoonful of liquid from the kettle and slurped it up.

He made a disgusted face. "Blah! It needs a little bit of dead beetle." Then to the disgust of Squidward, he picked up a dead beetle from the counter and threw it into the pot before taking another slurp from the stew.

“It’s gotta be here somewhere.” SpongeBob thought out loud as he ran through the kitchen. “Hoagie’s right. We’re gonna be saved!”

“Saved?!” Squidward questioned in anger. “How in Neptune’s name are we saved? You followed the advice of a spatula that’s been dooming our lives since the day you found it! For all we know, it could be trying to kill us right now!”

“Nah ah ah, Squidward.” SpongeBob teased as he walked over to the right side of the wall. “You’re forgetting. That where there are fancy kitchens, there’s bound to be a lot of garbage, and where there’s a lot of garbage,” he pulls down a small metal door with a sliding duct inside, “There’s a garbage chute!”

At this, Squidward smiled and ran over to the chute to see SpongeBob was right about it being their ticket out of here. “I never thought I’d say this,” Squidward said to the smiling sponge, “but nice job, SpongeBob!”

SpongeBob grinned and flushed at these comments until it was all disrupted by an icy voice, “Yeah, SpongeBob…nice job.”

The three turn to the doorway to see the lead frog, Kip, standing there with a malevolent smile on his face. “You saved us the trouble of dragging you in here ourselves. Just in time for supper.”

The frogs behind him all laughed as one of them said, “Let’s start cooking, Kip!”

SpongeBob quickly blurted, “Wait a minute, Kip!” he stood in ahead of them and put on a weak smile, trying to remain as calm as possible. “You don’t really wanna eat me, right? I mean, you already took my shoes, socks, and other personal belongings. So why not just let us go and we can all be even?”

But Kip’s response to this was to shoot his tongue out like a whip at SpongeBob as the sponge shrieked and quickly stepped to the side to avoid it.

“I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way, kid.” Kip said in a cold sinister tone as he stared down at SpongeBob. “I always get what I want. And I think we’ll be having you for eats tonight, and maybe your two friends can join us tomorrow for breakfast and lunch.”

“All right!” Patrick cheered in complete oblivious until he looked skeptical all of a sudden. “Wait. We’re not having stew, are we? Cuz that would be a real bummer.”

“Oh please, Mr. Kip.” SpongeBob begged as held his frightened face. “Can’t we work something out? You see, I’ve been through a lot these past five days and I really don’t want to have to fight my way through anything else that wants to kill me.”

“No fighting, just surrendering.” Kip responded as he walked toward SpongeBob. “If I don’t kill you all, how else am I supposed to silence you twits about what we do?”

As Kip slowly advanced towards him, SpongeBob whimpered in fright as he backed away toward the stove. Squidward seemed quickly frightened as he tried to shrink against the wall.

“Wait!” Patrick called out. “I know just what we can give you if you let us go. A kiss!”

To this, everybody gave him strange looks. But Patrick just continued on, “My mom read me a story once that when a frog got kissed by somebody, they turned into a prince and got everything they wanted!”

Squidward, of course, didn’t look convince by it, “That has got to be the stupi-”

“That’s brilliant!” Kip said, now with a look of shock and amazement. “I never knew. Did you, boys?” he turned to his cohorts, and they all shake their heads in response, also surprised by this statement.

Then Kip turned around with emotion and hurt in his voice which surprised the three, “But the truth is I’ve never been kissed by anyone. Not even by my own mum.”

SpongeBob then tried to offer some sympathy for the frog leader. “I’m sure when the time comes when you are kissed; you still have a lot of good and beauty in you and you’ll get everything your heart desires.”

“Uh- yeah.” Squidward hesitantly agreed. “Sure.” Then he muttered under his breath, “But I’m not doing the kissing.”

“Thanks mate,” Kip said sincerely. “That means a lot.” He wiped a tear from his real eye. “I’ll always remember that after I kill you all.”

After this comment, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward’s eyes bulge out, and the frog gang laughs evilly again as Kip shoots his long tongue out and grabs SpongeBob, lifting him up in the air.

“No!” SpongeBob cries out as he tries to shake loose. “No! No! No!”

Kip then dangles SpongeBob over the large kettle pot. “Any last words before we start cooking?” he coldly asks.

Thinking quickly, Squidward looks on the counter and spots a red bottle sitting there. He rushes over, grabs it, and squirts red liquid on Kip’s outstretched tongue. The frog leader’s eye starts to water and the sauce burns his tongue as he cries out in pain while his gang surrounds him in concern.

His tongue drops SpongeBob on the ground, and the sponge quickly gets up and runs over to his friends. “Let’s go.” Squidward said as he and the two go to the garbage chute.

Patrick climbs in and attempts to go through, but his weight made it difficult.

SpongeBob and Squidward try to push him through, but the frogs notice them. “Hey, they’re getting away!” one of the frogs shouted.

As Squidward tried to push Patrick through, SpongeBob momentarily stops and notices a bag of flour on the table. He takes out his spatula and it glows green before firing a beam of light and making the bag explode into blinding white powder.

With the frogs blind and coughing, Patrick finally succeeds in getting through the chute, and Squidward climbs in next, followed by SpongeBob who slides through the chute.

After sliding through the chute, they take a large drop from the castle that resided off a cliff and land in a small pond of murky green water and scattered trash.

“Ugh…” Squidward groaned as he sat up. “We made it.”

SpongeBob lifted his face out of the dirty water and looked equally exhausted, “Yeah.”

Patrick stood up and walked looked around, “Where are we now?”

“Outside the miserable frog castle, you idiot!” Squidward bitterly responded. “Where else would we-” but then a gust of wind blew, causing him to shiver. “Brrrr…it’s so cold.”

SpongeBob held his arms as well from the cold, “It is. And it was so warm before-” then his eyes widen in realization. “It is cold. This could only mean one thing: We’re near the Arctic!”

“What?” Squidward asked in surprise.

“Yay!” Patrick cheered and clapped. “We’re finally there!”

SpongeBob and Patrick high-five and body slam in joy. Squidward just stood there and frowned dully. “Alright, alright,” he said, interrupted. “We’re almost there, happy, happy. Now let’s just get there before those frogs catch up to us.”

The two agreed and Patrick excitedly said, “Can I scout ahead again?”

“I don’t see why not.” SpongeBob cheerfully agreed. “Want me come with you?”

“No thanks. I know exactly where I’m going.”

Patrick then ran off over the stone hills and Squidward began to get out of the dirty pond. But before he could take one step out, SpongeBob suddenly ran up and hugged him. “SpongeBob!” he shouted in annoyance. “What are you doing?”

SpongeBob looked up at him with glowing eyes and a genuine warm smile. “I just wanna thank you; for saving my life back there.” He hugged him even tighter. “I don’t know what I’d do without you guys.”

Squidward’s frown suddenly disappeared into a stunned look as he stared down at the grateful sponge who he despised so much. “Uh…sure.” He struggled to say. “Don’t mention it.” When SpongeBob finally let go, Squidward quickly attempted to change the subject, “We better get going if we wanna reach the Arctic.”

“You’re sure right, Squidward.” SpongeBob replied with a giggle. “Let’s go! Maybe when we get there, we can play in the nice calm pretty snow.”

He ran off to catch up to his best friend, Patrick, while Squidward stood there in the pond with a blank look on his face. But then, a small smile suddenly grew on as he sighed.

“Another job well done, Squiddy.” He said to himself proudly. “You are a born hero.”

From above the garbage chute, a large bag of trash suddenly plummeted down and landed right on top of Squidward, piling the hero into the murky green pond.

[TJ]

Great chapter!

[box]

I've been a lurker, and i have to say this is a nicely done spinoff. I'll be sure to catch the next chapter.

[NegiSpongie]

Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

Chapter 19: Freezer of the Mind

Later that same evening, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward continued their journey; and after days of travel, the three finally reached the Arctic Ocean! However…unlike SpongeBob’s previous comment, the Arctic was not nice, calm, or pretty. It was nothing but strong gusts of freezing wind full of ice and snow.

This made the walk through it not at all easy for SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward. With Squidward and Patrick’s luggage lost, and SpongeBob’s luggage stolen, the only thing the three had to keep warm was the cloaks the mermaids gave them. The snow on SpongeBob’s bare feet was of course uncomfortable for him, but if Squidward and Patrick can walk without shoes every day, so could he.

As Squidward trudged through the rough blizzard, he finally yelled out over the loud wind, “I take it all back! Compared to everything I’ve been through this past week, this is a nightmare!”

“It’s not so bad, Squidward!” SpongeBob yelled back to him, trying to remain positive. “We’re really almost done once we reach the volcano!”

“I still don’t believe…” Squidward yelled, now out of breath from walking through the cold. “That there is a volcano…in this wasteland!”

“There has to be!” SpongeBob shouted with a shiver as the icy wind hit his face. “Mr. Krabs said there would be! Right Patrick?”

From under his hood, Patrick cupped his ear and shouted back, “What?!”

SpongeBob spoke in a louder voice over the wind, “I said, there has to be a volcano here, right Patrick?!”

“WHAT?!”

“I SAID, THERE HAS TO BE A VOLCANO OUT HERE, RIGHT PA-” but a strong gust of wind suddenly blew right pass them, knocking the sponge off his feet.

Patrick didn’t seem to notice and leaned closer to SpongeBob, “CAN YOU REPEAT THAT, SPONGEBOB?”

SpongeBob sounded as if he responded, but with all the snow on top of him, he was muffled.

“We don’t have time for this!” Squidward shouted over the wind as he grabbed SpongeBob’s arm and pulled him out of the snow and onto his feet. “We’re gonna freeze to death if we just stand here!” He paused as his teeth chatter from the cold. “And I am not about to let that happen after coming all this way, and finally making it to this stupid Arctic!”

“You’re right, Squidward!” SpongeBob agreed with a shiver as he rubbed both his arms. “If we don’t hurry, Hoagie will never be free from that spatula.”

“You’re worried about that vile spatula when our lives are in danger?” Squidward frustratingly asked.

“I made a-”

“You made a promise to Hoagie and Mr. Krabs!” Squidward finished sarcastically as he began to continue walking. “Blah, blah, blah! I get it already!”

“Wow,” Patrick said to SpongeBob in amazement. “Squidward’s a mind-reader.”

But then Squidward stopped a moment and shivered. “I just don’t know how long we can keep walking without a wormsled!”

As SpongeBob stood there in the cold snow, he narrowed his eyes in determination, patted his right pocket, and began to march forward. “We can do it, Squidward!” He grabbed Squidward’s hand. “As long as we stick together, the freezing winds won’t stop us!” He extended his other hand toward Patrick. “Come on, Pat!”

Patrick grabbed his best friend’s hand, and SpongeBob began pulling the two through the cold wind and snow. As he trudged and trudged his frozen feet through the snow, he noticed his path was blinded by the snow-filled wind. Oddly, Squidward and Patrick hadn’t made a peep since they started walking again through the blizzard, but he still had their hands in his grasp so he knew they were there. But how much further could he go until they reached the volcano: The last stop of their journey?

It was a sunny day out on beautiful Jellyfish Fields, where the jellyfish were happily buzzing about in the sky. Behind a large boulder, a small jellyfish net was sticking out, possibly trying to be inconspicuous. But when a jellyfish buzzed passed it, from behind the boulder, leapt SpongeBob SquarePants with his net over his head and a shrill cry of excitement.

He flew through the air and swiftly caught the jellyfish in his net. Afterwards, he floated lightly back down to the ground on his feet right next to Patrick.

“Whoo-hoo!” Patrick cheered with his fist held in the air. “Nice catch, SpongeBob!”

SpongeBob bowed gracefully. “Thank you, my good man.” Then he stood up and pushed his net outward to let the jellyfish go free. “Nothing beats a day of jellyfishing; especially after returning from the Arctic.”

“I didn’t like the Arctic.” Patrick commented. “It was too cold.”

“Me neither.” SpongeBob made an assuring smile. “But it’s over and we don’t have to worry about it anymore.”

“Uh huh,” Patrick agreed with a nod. “What’s next on your list-of-things-to-do-now-that-we’re-back-home?”

SpongeBob reached into his left pocket and pulled out a long sheet of paper. “It says here that I have karate with Sandy.” He put his list back his pocket. “What does yours say?”

Patrick reached into his pocket and pulled out a list that was much smaller than SpongeBob’s. Right below the checkmark with ‘Jellyfish with SpongeBob’ was the checkmark ‘Do nothing’. “It’s ‘do nothing’. That’s the one what I’ve been waiting for!”

“That’s great, buddy!” SpongeBob shouted in joy. “Later on, I have ‘Eat hero cake with my best friend’.”

“That’s the second one I’ve been waiting for!”

“Mine too. I love being a hero. Wait’ll Sandy gets a load of me when I see her.”

“Oh! Oh! Oh!” Patrick shouted to get his attention. “And don’t forget to make her bow down before you since you’re a hero now.”

SpongeBob bowed again and replied, “That I shall do, fellow hero, Mr. Patrick Star.”

When SpongeBob turned to walk away, Patrick suddenly grabbed his shoulder to stop him. “What do you think you’re doing, SquarePants?” he asked in anger

“Walking to Sandy.” SpongeBob meekly replied.

“You can’t walk.” Patrick pointed out brusquely. “Heroes don’t walk!”

SpongeBob stopped and considered this. “Hmm, you’re right. But how will I get there without using my feet?”

To answer his question, a group of jellyfish flew in front of him and huddled together to make a platform for someone to sit upon.

“I guess my ride is here.” SpongeBob said with a smile as he hopped up and sat down on top of the jellyfish.

Patrick blew kiss to SpongeBob as the jellyfish began to lift him into the sky. “Farewell, Master SpongeBob, I shall see you in another time.”

SpongeBob stared down at Patrick and waved back to him. “Goodbye Pat! I shall see you at another time as well- like lunch, is that okay?”

As SpongeBob flew through the skies of Bikini Bottom, he yawned and stretched his arms. “I’ll tell ya, life as a hero can be pretty exhausting.”

The jellyfish buzzed in response, and SpongeBob responded, “Why, I saw plenty of stuff on my adventure. I even met a Black Toxicity Jellyfish.”

The jellyfish make buzzing noises again to which SpongeBob sighs sadly and answers, “Unfortunately, yes…” he perks up and shouts happily, “But I lived!”

The group of jellyfish seemed to buzz in excitement as they landed toward the ground at Goo Lagoon. SpongeBob hopped on the sandy beach and waved goodbye to the jellyfish as they flew back to Jellyfish Fields.

SpongeBob turned around and saw Sandy lifting weights and impressing everybody with her tremendous strength.

“Sandy!” SpongeBob called out as he ran toward his squirrel friend.

Sandy dropped the weight on the sand and turned to welcome her friend. “Howdy SpongeBob!” she greeted with a smile. “Nice to see you’re back.”

“I’m glad to be back, Miss. Cheeks.” SpongeBob replied in a proud tone. “And did you know I just so happen to be a hero upon my return.”

“Well, of course I know. Everyone does.” She signaled to the other beachgoers, who were cheering in excitement as they looked at SpongeBob. “You’re tougher than a Bull-rider on a bucking bronco weighin’ in at 800 pounds.”

SpongeBob gasped in amazement at his cheering fans. “We love you, SpongeBob!” one of them shouted.

“You’re a hero!” a blue male fish shouted from behind the crowd.

A man in front held a small notebook. “Sign my notebook!”

“Sign my surfboard!” another fish shouted holding his long surfboard.

“Sign my dentures!” an old lady fish shouted, pulling her false teeth out of her mouth.

“Sign my underwear!” a young male fish shouted, holding out a pair of tightey-whiteys.

“Sign my kid!” A man shouted as he held out his son.

While SpongeBob was distracted by the high-strung crowd, Sandy suddenly put on her green karate gloves, and got his attention. “Now how about we see just what all that travelin’ and hero stuff made yall!”

SpongeBob laughed and pulled out his red karate gloves. “I’ll show you just what I did to that mean ‘ol chief!”

As the karate match began, all the fish were pumping their fist in the air and chanting for their favorite sponge, “Hero! Hero! Hero! Hero! Hero!”

While SpongeBob prepared to make his move, a group of teenage girl fish jumped out of the crowd and got next to SpongeBob, “We love you, SpongeBob!” one of them screamed widely.

“You’re so handsome!”

“Kiss me!”

Before SpongeBob could react to any of them, Sandy suddenly jumped forward and knocked them all away with a karate chop. “They had that one comin’.” Sandy simply stated.

She then made another karate chop at SpongeBob, who quickly reacted by blocking it with his gloved-fist. “HI-YAA!” SpongeBob cried out as he closed his eyes and lifted his fist.

When Sandy blocked his attack, SpongeBob continued by jumping toward Sandy and landing a karate chop at her. But Sandy quickly blocked it and made one swift uppercut that knocked SpongeBob into the air.

As the crowd continued chanting for their hero, SpongeBob fell back toward the ground with his fist held high and a determined smile on his face. He dismounted with ease and twirled around until he gave Sandy a hard karate chop at her face, sending her sliding on the ground. The crowd cheered widely for SpongeBob’s victory as the sponge ran over to see if his opponent was alright.

But Sandy got up with ease and smiled. “Whoo-eee! You really are stronger than three two-ton oxen pullin’ a heavy loaded wagon filled with fifty stacks of hay.”

SpongeBob giggled in delight. “You really think so?”

“Sure nuff.” Sandy replied with a nod.

“THERE HE IS!” a female voice shouted, and the two quickly turn to see a mob of female fish standing ahead.

“IT’S THE HERO!” they all shouted and screamed as they began to stampede toward SpongeBob.

The sponge laughed and said to Sandy. “I’ll see you next time.” He said to her before running away at fast speed.

Sandy just narrowed her eyes in annoyance as the mob of women ran past her to chase after their hero. She continued to stand there until the mob passed, but her eyes widen to see Scooter also following in hot pursuit as he laughed his usual surfer dialect laugh.

SpongeBob soon ran all the way out of Goo Lagoon and through the streets of Bikini Bottom as the mob chanted, “Hero, hero, hero!” as they continued to chase SpongeBob like a pack of adoring fans. SpongeBob himself enjoyed this, but the excitement of it soon began to die down as he tired out from all the running.

As SpongeBob ran, he said to himself with each pant, “…Phew…Now I know what it feels like to be in a music video.”

SpongeBob was chased all the way out of the city and reached a high cliff. With no other choice, he jumped off which stopped the mob from following him. Yet, SpongeBob didn’t plummet to the ground; he was caught by Gary…with a jetpack on his shell.”

SpongeBob hung onto his pet snail and looked back to see his fans screaming his name in excitement as they watched him fly away. Gary having a jetpack just in time to rescue him did not seem odd in the slightest, so he just sighed in relief and said, “Thanks Gary.”

“Meow.” Gary replied back and commented.

SpongeBob blushed and replied, “Yeah, I am a hero.”

Gary narrowed his eyes dully and added, “Meow.”

“Oh, behave, Gary.” SpongeBob replied with a grin.

When they reached Conch Street, Gary lowered to the ground and dropped SpongeBob on the street right in front of his house. When SpongeBob was safely on the ground, the sponge waved goodbye to his flying snail. “Thanks Gar!”

Before SpongeBob could have a minute alone, Squidward ran up to him, much to his delight. “SpongeBob, you’re here!” he said with a big smile.

“Oh hey, Squidward.” SpongeBob greeted with a smile. “I haven’t seen you since we came back. How are you getting along?”

“I’m doing just fine, SpongeBob.” Squidward said in a cheerful tone. “In fact, I’ve never been better.” Then he instantly pulled out a bowl of vanilla ice-cream from behind his back. “I got us some ice-cream to share together. I know it’s your favorite.”

“That it is!” SpongeBob gleefully replied as he took a spoonful from the bowl and ate a bite. All the while, Squidward’s abnormal behavior didn’t cross his mind one bit.

As Squidward ate some of the ice-cream too, he asked SpongeBob. “So how does it feel being a hero? Everyone knows you definitely deserve it.”

“It feels great.” SpongeBob answered in joy. “I know that journey was the right thing to do.” He then reached back into his pocket and took out the list. “That reminds me. The next thing on my list is to pay my respects.”

“Oh yeah…” Squidward said, suddenly looking sad. “Can’t forget about that.”

“Wanna come with me?”

“No thanks. I’m gonna paint a pretty picture of the rainbow I saw out my window the other day.” Squidward explained as he handed SpongeBob the ice-cream. “Why don’t you keep the rest, so can stay happy while visiting Mr. Krabs.”

SpongeBob smiled again as he held the bowl. “Oh, thanks, Squidward. You’re the best friend ever.”

Squidward grinned and pointed at SpongeBob. “No, you’re the best friend ever.”

SpongeBob chuckled and said, “No, you are.”

“No, you.”

“No, you are.”

“No, you.”

“No, you are.”

“No, you.”

“No, you are.”

“No, you times infinity.”

“Oh, barnacles, you got me.” SpongeBob said with a laugh before walking away. “See you later, Squidward.”

Squidward cheerfully waved and shouted, “Goodbye SpongeBob, ol’ pal of mine!”

Later on, behind the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob knelt down in front of a tombstone stuck into the ground and the words written across, ‘In Memory of Mr. Krabs: The Greatest Boss Ever’.

SpongeBob smiled sadly as he talked to the memorial. “We sure do miss you, Mr. Krabs. You’re a hero too, you know that? We just wish you can be here with us to celebrate our return.”

He placed a bouquet of sea flowers by the memorial, and then placed the bowl of ice-cream next to it.

“And here’s some ice-cream Squidward gave me. You can have some too.” He stood up and placed his uniform hat on. “You may be dead, but I’ll keep the Krusty Krab alive in your honor.”

SpongeBob stood up and walked into the Krusty Krab to resume his job as fry cook. The inside of the restaurant was completely empty that it was almost eerie, no customers and no Squidward to cashier. But SpongeBob loved the place so much that he didn’t let the emptiness affect him. Surely when he got the place bustling again, it’ll be as good as it was even now that Mr. Krabs wasn’t running it anymore. But when he was about to walk into the kitchen, he spotted a shadow from inside the kitchen through the window by the front counter boat.

“Hello?” SpongeBob called out to whoever it was. He opened the kitchen door and mentioned, “This area’s restricted for Krusty Krab employees only.”

But once he stepped inside the kitchen, he spotted a shark wearing glasses, a yellow shirt, brown pants, boots, a cooking apron with a name tag, and a Krusty Krab hat; standing in front of the grill. SpongeBob somehow recognized him, but he just couldn’t remember where.

Before he knew it, the shark turned to him with a sharp toothy braces-filled grin as he responded, “But I am an employee here.”

“Uhhh…” SpongeBob stammered, unsure of what to say. “I…I’m sorry. I don’t remember seeing you work here before.”

“You mean you don’t recognize me?” the shark replied in his friendliest tone. “Eh, I’m not surprised. I mean I’ve only talked to you a few times, and you’ve never seen me in person. How can you see anyone at work when they’re dead?”

“Wait a minute.” SpongeBob said as a thought came into his mind, and suddenly remembered where he had seen this person. “You wouldn’t happen to be…”

“Hoagie Grindulas?” the shark finished as he gestured over his nametag which SpongeBob obviously didn’t notice right in front of him. “At your service.”

“Oh Neptune!” SpongeBob cried out with shrill excitement in his voice. “I don’t believe it. You’re really here standing in front of me! The first fry cook of the Krusty Krab, the maker of the most delicious krabby patties the sea has ever tasted. He’s standing right in front of me!”

Hoagie giggled in flattery. “Oh, stop you’re embarrassing me. I can’t believe I’m meeting the current fry cook of the Krusty Krab, the one who makes just as scrumptious krabby patties anyone has ever tasted.”

Then, they suddenly grab hands and jump for joy in unison that it was like being in front of a mirror. “You’re my hero!” they shouted in harmony.

Then SpongeBob straightened up as best as his over-eagerness would let him and added, “The only way to make a krabby patty the tastiest in Bikini Bottom…”

“…is to shower them with love!” Hoagie finished in the same excited tone as his fellow fry cook.

“Oh, this is just too great!” SpongeBob said in happiness as he spun around once. “I could never get this much enthusiasm out of Squidward.”

“Yeah, Squidward…” Hoagie said as he reminisced. “He isn’t a jolly one, is he? But he does have interesting pride in his own…interest, doesn’t he?”

“I guess.” SpongeBob said with a chuckle. “But I don’t get it, Hoagie. Why are you here when you’re soul should be free after we threw you into the volcano?”

“Oh,” Hoagie replied with a sly smile. “Did you?”

“Well, yeah. I’m back in Bikini Bottom and everyone is glad that I made it back okay. I’m a hero.”

“Are sure about that, kid?” Hoagie asked, now looking really intimidating. “Haven’t you noticed that everyone you’ve met today didn’t even mention why you’re a hero?”

SpongeBob seemed shock by this, but even more so when Hoagie added, “And why don’t you check your front pocket?”

SpongeBob did this as he dug his hand into his right pocket and pulled out none other than the cursed golden spatula. “It can’t be!” he shouted in shock as he stared at it.

“It is.” Hoagie said with a smirk.

SpongeBob stammered a bit as he tapped on the spatula. “But… if you’re in here…” he pointed at Hoagie with his shaking finger. “Then how are you…”

“You don’t get it, do you, kid?” Hoagie said, staring close at SpongeBob as he too tapped on the spatula. “Yes, half of me is in here.” Then he tapped the side of SpongeBob’s head. “But the other half is right here.”

“In my head?” SpongeBob muttered in shock.

“No, silly.” Hoagie said with a friendly smile again as he took a step back and spread his arms apart. “Right here…in your mind.”

“My mind?” SpongeBob held his face in shock, dropping the spatula on the ground. “You mean we’re inside my mind right now.”

“Think about it, Cheesehead. What’s the last thing you remember doing before all this?”

“I was…I was walking through the Arctic with Patrick and Squidward. It was really cold and…”

“EXACTLY!” Hoagie shouted in enthusiasm. “You appear here because you’re excited about what’ll happen after you throw my soul into that volcano. You think everyone will praise you yet, no one even knows where the heck you are right now or what you’re doing. But why in Neptune’s name would anybody praise you when you’re THROWING ME INTO A VOLCANO?!”

SpongeBob was startled by Hoagie’s sudden outburst, but gave a weak smile and chuckle. “But Hoagie…we’re only doing it, so we can…”

“Free my soul?” Hoagie walked over and franticly grabbed SpongeBob by his arms. “Who said I wanted my soul free?”

“Well, Mr. Krabs said…”

“KRABS?!” Hoagie shouted in anger as he shook SpongeBob. “Who cares about what he said! He wouldn’t let me love my krabby patties!”

SpongeBob was almost scared by Hoagie’s outbursts, but before he can even say anything to calm the spirit down. Hoagie instantly calmed down on his own and smiled calmly as he let go of SpongeBob.

“Look at them, kid.” Hoagie smoothly said as he signaled over to a stack of freshly made krabby patties that somehow instantly appeared on the grill. “Don’t they just make you wanna cry?”

As SpongeBob stared at them, he didn’t cry, but his eyes glow as he smiled. “…yeah. They’re perfectly made too.”

Hoagie walked over to them and wrapped his arms around them. “They deserve to be loved and nurtured.” As he held an armful of krabby patties, his eyes glare with hatred again. “And that fool Krabs wouldn’t let me give them that. Can you believe it?”

As SpongeBob stared at him from far away, he decided to take the risk and talk to the crazed deceased fry cook. “Uh…Hoagie? Don’t you think that maybe krabby patties can be loved and enjoyed by others?”

“NO!” Hoagie yelled out in a crazed voice as he turned to SpongeBob with an equal expression that startled the sponge. “Don’t ever suggest that, kid!”

He then approached SpongeBob and spoke in a calm voice as he grabbed SpongeBob’s hands, “Do you want all the hard work we put into those krabby patties to be soiled? Do you really think anybody can treat them with the same respect and love as we do?”

SpongeBob wasn’t sure what Hoagie was trying to convince him of, but the last few days, he knew what feeling he was talking about, so he could easily answer, “No.”

“Exactly.” Then Hoagie turned and walked away as he began to cry real tears. “And Krabs just took that all away from me. The next thing I know, I’m in my own spatula unable to feel my own krabby patties.”

Soon enough, SpongeBob found himself crying. “Oh, Hoagie…Don’t you worry, I’ll do whatever it takes to get you to that volcano and free you.”

Hoagie suddenly snapped, no longer in tears, “Weren’t you listening, you nit-wit? How am I supposed to be with any of my krabby patties if I’m in what you call ‘the afterlife’?”

“Gee…” SpongeBob said as he thought this over. “I never really thought of that.”

Hoagie suddenly turned his head toward SpongeBob as he wickedly chuckled and smirked. “And there’s your answer.” He waved his hand, and at his movements, the golden spatula lifted in the air and fell back into SpongeBob’s hands. “To tell the truth, you’re my favorite keeper of my spatula. After all, you love krabby patties just like I do.”

SpongeBob smiled lightly. “That’s what I like about you too, Hoagie.”

“Yeah, I know, but listen to me, kid.” Hoagie said in determination as he turned to SpongeBob and stared him in the eyes. “As I said before, part of my soul is in that spatula, and the other part is right here in your mind. The more you hold my spatula, the stronger I become in here. I make the best krabby patties and give them all the love and care they need, and with my spatula, so can you. You can make all the patties you want and I’ll be right here at your side, helping you all the way.

“One spatula to rule all krabby patties, one spatula to find krabby patties, one spatula to bring all krabby patties and on the heat of the grill bind them!” he grinned to SpongeBob. “-came up with that myself just now- and you know what the best part is? No one will ever touch them. As long as you hold my spatula, you can feel that.”

As SpongeBob listened to Hoagie’s words, he had a blank look on his face as he took in everything he said.

“What do you say to that…fellow fry cook?”

Hoagie anticipated SpongeBob’s answer, and when the answer finally came, SpongeBob snapped out of his daze and wiped his forehead. “Is it getting hot in here?”

“What?” Hoagie asked in confusion.

“No, really.” SpongeBob continued saying as he began to sweat. “It’s getting really hot in here.” As he began to sweat more and more, he fanned himself with his hand. “Okay, now it’s burning up.”

He suddenly hopped in the air and steam spewed out of his pores as he screamed, “AAAAAAHHH!

“AAAAAAAHH!!!” SpongeBob screamed as he sat up with his tongue sticking out of his mouth.

“SpongeBob, you’re awake!” Patrick cried out as he hugged SpongeBob in joy.

“Patrick?” SpongeBob asked in surprise to see his best friend.

He looked around and saw he was sitting in the snow-covered field of the Arctic Ocean, right where he was before his last predicament took place. The only change that occurred was that the harsh winds seemed to have died down a bit, making the area a little easier to see.

“Finally.” Squidward said as he sat next to the two with a bottle. “I thought you were gonna lie there dead forever.”

“Squidward?” SpongeBob asked as well until he smiled and stood up. “I was wondering where you guys ran off to after I met Hoagie. You should’ve been there. He was amazing.”

“SpongeBob, what the barnacles are you talking about?” Squidward asked in annoyed anger. “You’ve lying there for two hours.”

“I what?” SpongeBob asked, now in shock.

“Uh huh,” Patrick said with a nod.

Squidward continued explaining, “While you and Patrick were acting like morons and wasting your warm breath by shouting, a strong wind blew and the next thing that happened, you fell over from hypothermia.”

“All that really happened?” SpongeBob asked, feeling his own body to see if he had any chills.

“That’s right.” Patrick answered as he pulled SpongeBob in for a hug. “But I was the one that warmed you up again, and Squidward was the one who helped wake you up by putting the frogs’ hot sauce in your mouth.”

“Oh,” SpongeBob said, a little surprised and shaken. “But I was in my mind, and Hoagie was telling me all that stuff.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the spatula. “He said he didn’t wanna be thrown into the volcano.”

As Patrick looked ahead into the distance, he smiled and pointed, “Hey look! The sun is coming up!”

SpongeBob and Squidward looked in the same direction and saw a bright red glow ahead in the distance Patrick was pointing to.

“I don’t think that’s the sun.” Squidward mentioned, looking a bit unsure.

“Yeah…” SpongeBob agreed. “It looks like.”

As the weather cleared up a bit more, they noticed a mountain from where the red glow was, and when squinting, they noticed the glow was emitting from the top of the mountain.

Squidward removed his hood and stared in shock. “Is that the…”

“VOLCANO!” SpongeBob and Patrick cheered in joy as they jumped up in the snow.

“Come on!” Patrick shouted as he began running toward the mountain.

Squidward followed closely behind, and SpongeBob stopped a moment, he looked at the spatula and said to it quietly, “I’m sorry, Hoagie. I know you’re scared, but you have to be set free. I promise when this is over, I’ll make krabby patties not just for the customers, but for you as well.”

“SPONGEBOB!” Squidward yelled at him from afar. “Get a move on before you freeze again!”

“Coming!” SpongeBob shouted back as he pocketed the spatula and ran forward to catch up with the others.

But from far away, as the three rushed toward the Arctic Volcano, a small pair of antennas moved through the snow like a submarine and stopped. They rise up and a small eye comes into view, carrying a bloodshot menacing glare that stared at his objective moving ahead.

[NegiSpongie]

Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

Chapter 20: Near the Inferno

Soon, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward reach the volcano and began to climb up the heated mountain. SpongeBob being the most excited of the three, climbed up the fastest. “We’re here! We’re here!” he shouted eagerly with each climb. “You hear that, Hoagie? You’re only minutes away from being freed!” he let out a giggle and once again said, “Freed...! Freed…freed.”

Suddenly, his smile disappears and his climbing slows down which allows his friends to catch up to him. Patrick stopped next to him and asked in concern, “What’s wrong, SpongeBob?”

SpongeBob shook out of his daze and answered, “Oh, nothing. I’m fine.”

Squidward climbed next to him and spat, “Then stop doddling and let’s get a move on. The sooner this nightmare ends the better.”

They continued their climb up the volcano and eventually reached the top with a large flat surface at the ring of the mouth that had smoke coming from inside.

“Wow,” Patrick said as he stood at the top. “Climbing a volcano can really make a guy perspirate.” This was proven when he lifted up his arm to show his armpit sweating.

Squidward’s forehead even began to sweat which he wiped with his arm. “Let’s just hurry and throw that spatula in. I can really use that blizzard now.”

“Sure thing, Squidward. It won’t take long.” SpongeBob said with a nod as he took the spatula out of his pocket and walked over to the edge of the volcano by himself.

He stopped and glanced over the edge to see boiling lava inside. He gulped and looked at the spatula. “Well, Hoagie, I guess this is goodbye.” He said to the spatula. “We’ve really been through a lot together, and you still make the most delicious krabby patties in the whole sea. I know you’re scared, but I have to throw you into the volcano now. It’ll free you from the spatula and from my mind.”

He extends his arm over the edge, about to drop the spatula into the lava. But before he can let go of the spatula, he talks to it once again, “It’s a shame though. If you were alive, we could’ve made the finest krabby patties together, and share ice-cream, go to the movies, make krabby patties together, spend a day at Goo Lagoon, make krabby patties together, go jellyfishing…” as he goes on, his eyes slowly widen with madness and retracts his arm back with the spatula, “…make krabby patties together…go bike-riding…keep krabby patties together.”

He holds the spatula close and gets an enraged look as he speaks in a spiteful tone, “Oh, I see it now. Everybody wants me to get rid of you…cuz they’re all just jealous.” He glares even harder as he tightens his grip on the spatula. “You were right, Hoagie. They don’t care about our patties, they only care about themselves.”

From near the cliff, Patrick and Squidward were standing far behind as they watch SpongeBob finish their duty. But after while, they notice the sponge was taking longer than he should have.

“SpongeBob!” Squidward called out to him. “What’s the hold up? Did you toss that thing yet?”

At this, SpongeBob immediately turned around with an uncharacteristically dark frown on his face and the golden spatula still in his fist. This seemed to startle them a bit.

“SpongeBob?” Patrick timidly asked. “I think you forgot to throw the spatula in the volcano.”

“No, Patrick Star.” SpongeBob spoke in a stone cold voice. “I’m keeping Hoagie with me.” He smiled weakly and held the spatula close to his cheek. “We’re gonna be together forever and ever, and we’ll make all the krabby patties we want and no one will ever soil their beauty again!”

Squidward grabbed a hold of SpongeBob’s shoulders. “Get a hold of yourself, SquarePants! That’s the spatula talking! Go throw it into the volcano now!”

“NEVER!” SpongeBob shouted as he stepped back from Squidward’s grip. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? If you can’t have Hoagie, no one can, is that is?”

“You sick little freak.”

“But if you don’t throw the spatula in the lava, we can’t do all the things we said we were gonna do.” Patrick pointed out. “We’re best friends.”

“You’re wrong.” SpongeBob said with a glare. “Hoagie and I are best friends now. He said he’d be with me forever if I didn’t throw him into the lava.” He stroked the spatula’s metal. “He’s my fellow fry cook and we’ll never let anyone ruin our beautiful krabby patties again!”

He laughed madly and twirled around with the spatula held in the air while Squidward and Patrick could do nothing but stare haplessly as SpongeBob succumbed to the spatula’s power. But then, a scream was heard, and they all turn to see Plankton had climbed up the volcano and screamed madly as he jumped atop SpongeBob’s fist that held the spatula.

Plankton then struggled to pull the spatula out of SpongeBob’s fist as he shouted, “Gimme! Precious…spatula!”

However, SpongeBob refused to let go and stumbled around the volcano, fighting with Plankton over the spatula as he shouted, “No! Hoagie…mine!”

But SpongeBob soon stumbled backwards towards the edge of the volcano and the two fell over the side as Squidward and Patrick gasp in shock.

SpongeBob screamed and lost his grip on the spatula, but managed to grab onto a ledge that hung above the lava. However, Plankton held onto the spatula and grinned in triumph as he fell. “It’s mine!” he shouted. “It’s finally mine!” He laughed maniacally up until he and the spatula fell into the lava.

Afterwards, the lava in the volcano started to boil and smoke as it started to rise. SpongeBob still hung onto the ledge and sweated profusely in fear and heat as the magma nearly reached him. He closed his eyes, fearing the end- until two hands grabbed a hold of his arms and pulled him back up.

Squidward and Patrick pulled SpongeBob back on the ledge of the volcano just as the mountain erupted and spewed lava from the top like a fountain.

Surprisingly, from out of the lava, Plankton also flew out, albeit all scorched and blackened with the tip of his antennas lit with small flames. He flew through the sky like a comet with a blank look on his face. “Well…” he said in defeat. “I suppose it’s better to quit than let it overcome my life.”

As Plankton flew all the way out of the Arctic, more lava erupted from the volcano and black smoke reached the sky. Among the smoke, a sparkle of gold flickered and from out of the mouth of the volcano, eerie green mist flew into the sky and suddenly vanished into nothingness now that the soul of Hoagie Grindulas was free from the cooking tool and free to never possess anyone’s minds again.

“I can’t believe it.” SpongeBob’s voice spoke as he, Squidward, and Patrick lay flat on their backs on edge of a cliff that was on the side of the volcano. They were surrounded by a river of lava running down from the top which gave them no way to escape. But nonetheless, SpongeBob continued speaking cheerfully to his friends as he stared up at the ash-filled sky, “Hoagie’s free from the spatula and my mind. Free from that imprisonment and free to rest in peace. We did it.”

“Yeah…” Squidward somewhat agreed.

Patrick smiled and replied, “That’s right.”

Squidward sighed and added, “I guess this what victory feels like when I’m traveling with you two.” But then he heard sniffling and turned his head to see SpongeBob’s eyes watering as he cried. “SpongeBob, what’s wrong?”

“Well, I don’t really know how to feel about it.” SpongeBob answered sadly as he cried softly. “Even though Hoagie was a fry cook like me, he wasn’t as good a friend as I thought he was. He lied to me, made me feel anguished, and he made me treat you guys like dirt. Not to mention, he used me to mistreat the thing I love most in this world.”

Squidward thought SpongeBob crying over something as simple as that was not important, but nonetheless said to him, “Look, SpongeBob, he’s gone now and he can’t try and possess you anymore. If it makes you feel any better he nearly got to me too. Plus he’s more irritating than you are.”

SpongeBob wiped his tears and smiled, “Really?”

“Sure.”

SpongeBob’s smile came back and Patrick patted his shoulder. “And I think you’re a better friend than Hoagie is. And I would never use you.”

“Thanks, Pat.” SpongeBob said with a smile as he held Patrick’s hand. “And I know you’ll always be the perfect best friend for me.”

“Look,” Squidward said as he turned his head toward them. “I love to interrupt the sappiness, but you do realize that we’re stuck here?”

“Oh yeah.” SpongeBob remembered as his smile faded. “I don’t how we’re gonna get back to Bikini Bottom now.”

“And I really have to go to the bathroom too.” Patrick mentioned.

Squidward groaned loudly and his eyes water. “So this is how it all ends. Us stranded here and forced to die.”

As he began to cry, SpongeBob took his tentacle in his hand. “I guess you’re right.” He said with a small smile. “Maybe we are gonna die.”

Squidward stared at him, puzzled while SpongeBob grabbed Patrick’s hand as well. “But you know what?” he added. “I’m okay with it.”

As SpongeBob lied there, holding each of his friends’ hands, he smiled up at the sky and continued on, “We’ve been through so much together this past week and did a good thing for someone who needed our help…at the cost of me feeling his selfishness in my heart. And if we’re really supposed to die now after all of it, well…I’m glad that it’s together with you guys.”

After SpongeBob’s deep little emotional speech, Squidward suddenly tightened his grip on SpongeBob’s hand and looked back up at the sky with his eyes still watering. “Yeah…” he said in sadness, “Sounds great.”

“Will I be able to go to the bathroom after we die?” Patrick asked.

“We sure will, buddy.” SpongeBob answered optimistically as he softly closed his eyes. “We sure will.”

Many hours later, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward had passed out on the small island on the volcano. The three were still holding each other’s hand, never having let go. As the three lied there unconscious, a strange wind suddenly began to blow in the ash-filled sky.

SpongeBob began to open his eyes and sat up, having noticed this. As he looked up at the sky, he began to hear a strange whirring sound as well. But then, he noticed the wind began to pick up and the sound grew louder and louder.

Then through the ash, a bright light suddenly shined which SpongeBob had to squint to even see. He wasn’t sure if he should warn the other two of its possible danger or not worry about it.

But this all changed when the ash blew away in the wind and a helicopter came into view right over his head. The loud sound of the chopper woke up Squidward and Patrick as they stare up at it.

“Ahoy, boys!” a familiar voice called out.

The three stare up at the helicopter in agape to see its side door opened and inside was none other than Mr. Krabs.

“Mr. Krabs?!” the three asked in shock.

“He’s alive!” SpongeBob shouted in joy as he stood up.

The crab laughed as he stared down at his employees. “Long time no see!” he shouted down at them. “I wasn’t sure I’d ever find ya!”

“Mr. Krabs!” SpongeBob called out to him. “We did it! The spatula’s gone now!”

Mr. Krabs sighed happily and called back, “And with that, I think it’s time we all returned back home!”

He lowered a rope ladder from the helicopter, and SpongeBob, Squidward, and Patrick all cheered as they began to climb up. Once everyone was safely inside, Squidward immediately took a seat right next to a dented cash register and sighed in relief, “Heaven at last.”

“Squidward sure likes being dead.” Patrick commented to SpongeBob.

“You’re not dead, Patrick.” Mr. Krabs pointed out. “I happened to save you three from that horrible fate.”

“We’re glad to see you’re okay, Mr. Krabs.” SpongeBob told his boss with a smile and hug. “What happened to you anyway?”

“Well, it wasn’t a pretty sight.” Mr. Krabs contently explained. “Cashie an’ me barely escaped with our lives, we did. Kobra…not so lucky. But that doesn’t matter now cuz we’re headin’ back Bikini Bottom!”

The pilot, Ranger Dave, smiled as he looked back at them and began to drive the helicopter to take its passengers back home to Bikini Bottom.

[TJ]

Awesome episode!

[Old Man Jenkins]

This spin-off deserves more cred. I love it.

[NegiSpongie]

Keeper of the Spatula: Volume 3

Capter 20: Reconciliation

After destroying the cursed golden spatula of Hoagie Grindulas in the lava of the Arctic volcano, and returning home from the Arctic Ocean, three days have passed in Bikini Bottom since SpongeBob, Patrick, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward’s return. Things soon went back to normal as it was the day they left.

Right now, business at the Krusty Krab continued as Squidward took a customer’s order as usual.

“That’ll be two dollars.” Squidward said as he took the money from the fish, and opened up the cash register (whose wounds never healed since the journey) and placed the money inside.

As the krabby patty was placed on the window, the fry cook peeked out from behind and whispered, “Pss! Ask him.”

“No.” Squidward dully told SpongeBob as he took the patty.

“Come on, ask him.” SpongeBob continued to plead in whisper.

Squidward quickly gave in and gave the krabby patty to the customer as he asked, “Listen, have you heard of any heroes around lately?”

“No…” the customer asked, looking very confused, “Not really.”

“You’re lucky.”

After the customer walked away, Squidward told the sponge, “You see, SpongeBob? Once again, you’re not a hero, you’re a zero.”

SpongeBob sighed sadly as he cooked more patties on the grill. “That’s a shame.” But he quickly smiled. “Oh well, at least we know we succeeded.”

Squidward glanced back at him and commented, “You know, you’re really weirding me out, SpongeBob. For someone whose mind had been possessed by an evil cursed spatula, you’re sure acting like your normal annoying little self.”

SpongeBob was a little puzzled by what Squidward was concerned about. “But what about you?” he asked as well. “I remember you held Hoagie as well.”

“In case you haven’t noticed, I am psychologically broken.” Squidward pointed out. “Just like I was the day we left.”

Whether Squidward was right or not, he’d probably never know, but SpongeBob smiled again and answered the question as well, “To tell the truth, I think I was too.” He then looked concerned and a bit shamed. “I couldn’t tell you how scarred I was after losing Hoagie from my heart for good.” Then his giddy smile returned, “But…my happiness returned and my sorrow left when I held the one true spatula I’ll ever have.” To show this, he picked up his usual cooking spatula and held it close.”

“Gag me.” Squidward dourly muttered as he turned back around.

“Also, if it hadn’t been for what you said back there at that volcano, I don’t think I would have ever gotten back to normal!” SpongeBob mentioned.

“I don’t remember that!” Squidward shouted back. “I’ll have you know that everything I said before was because of the toxic fumes in the air from that volcano. I still hate you no matter what.”

Suddenly, the front doors opened and Patrick came inside. “Hey SpongeBob!”

“Hi Patrick!” SpongeBob greeted as he ran out of the kitchen and over to his best friend.

“You gotta help me.” Patrick said to SpongeBob, looking frantic about something. “I’m sending another pen to Clarice, but I don’t know which one to send her.” He held out two different colored pens. “Should I send her this blue one or this one with funny-looking ink inside?”

As SpongeBob pondered over this, he stared at the ‘funny-looking inked pen’ and noticed something more funnily about it.

“Patrick, that’s not a pen.” SpongeBob pointed out. “That’s a lead pencil.”

“Wow,” Patrick said in amazement as he stared at the pencil. “A pen with lead inside. She’ll love this!”

To SpongeBob’s surprise, Patrick excitedly rushed out the door to find a mailbox to send his pen to his pen-pal. SpongeBob then went back into the kitchen and picked up his spatula. He held it in both his palms and began talking to it.

“I’m sorry about what happened before.” He said in a sincere tone. “I guess I was blinded by Hoagie’s abilities that I completely forgot what’s really important in life. You may not be possessed by a talented deceased fry cook, but you’re my spatula and you can cook krabby patties better than Hoagie ever could.”

And to show just how much he appreciated his old spatula, SpongeBob decided to sing about it!

SpongeBob: OHHHH!

Hearing SpongeBob’s high notes, Squidward gritted his teeth in frustration and stuffed napkins in his ears, hoping to drown him out.

SpongeBob: Me and my Spat

He’s back in my hand

Serving up patties

And it’s just grand

SpongeBob scoops up all the krabby patties off the grill, having them neatly stacked on top of his spatula, and proceeds to toss them into the air with each patty landing neatly on the buns lined up on the counter.

SpongeBob: Me at my Spat

Still doin’ our part

Serving up patties

Now that he’s back in my heart

SpongeBob handed Squidward a plate with a krabby patty, but then retracted it just as he would do if still possessed by Hoagie, much to Squidward’s surprise. However, SpongeBob just grinned at his joke and handed it back while Squidward growled in annoyance and snatched the plate out of his hands.

Afterwards, SpongeBob came out of the kitchen with two trays of krabby patties in each hand. With careful aim, he enthusiastically tossed each tray on the customers’ table. After which, SpongeBob continued singing.

SpongeBob: Before I was blinded

Before I was wrong

But with Spat to remind me where my heart lies

I can keep myself going

Back to where I belong

The customers didn’t seem too entertained by SpongeBob’s song this time around; possibly because there was no flying golden spatula serving them their food. Nonetheless, SpongeBob continued singing from the bottom of his heart.

SpongeBob: OHHHH!

But this time, Mr. Krabs came out of his office and approached Squidward as he started singing the same song his employee sang with different lyrics, but the same tune.

Mr. Krabs: Hey! Me and my Cashie

We missed all the fun

Lost on the journey

With no credit done

Squidward: You two are lucky

I wanna go to bed

With what I’ve been through

I wish I were dead

From across the street, a large telescope was peering out of the Chum Bucket, which Plankton used to spy on the whole thing while he was sitting in a wheelchair that matched his height, and was wearing a neck brace and bandages on his arm and legs.

Plankton: I lost my ambition

I lost my life goal

Then Karen’s monitor strolled over behind Plankton and used her extendable arms to place a pillow behind her husband’s back.

Karen: But with that big failure, you can still do your worst

With this, Plankton grinned evilly as he possibly formed another one of his ideas now that he would go back to stealing the krabby patty formula.

Plankton: And I can keep myself going

I’m on a role!

Back at the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob was twirling around the restaurant with his spatula in one hand and a krabby patty in the other.

SpongeBob: OHHHH! Me and my Spat

We’re still a great team

Serving up patties

Just as it seems

SpongeBob: Me and my Spat

We’ll never be apart

Serving up patties

With all of our heart

As he finished his song, he twirled back into the kitchen and did a split on the floor for a finished beat. But as he lowered his head on the floor, he noticed something strange under the grill.

SpongeBob immediately came out of the kitchen with the item in hand. “Mr. Krabs!” he called out. “Do you know what this is?”

When Mr. Krabs spotted what SpongeBob had found, he screamed to see it was…an onion ring! Suddenly, a red warning light flashed and a loud siren rang out, startling all the customers.

Mr. Krabs yelled at the top of his lungs, “Vacate the premises, everyone!” as he chased out the customers, he continued yelling, “Ya heard me! Out all of ya!”

Once the restaurant was empty, the Krusty Krab once again went into lockdown with steel walls covering the windows and doors. An angry Mr. Krabs walked over to Squidward and SpongeBob, who both had equally odd looks.

“What’s wrong, Mr. Krabs?” SpongeBob asked in confusion.

“Do you know what that is, boy?” Mr. Krabs asked as he pointed at the onion ring.

SpongeBob gasped as he held out the onion out. “Is this a cursed item that has another fry cook’s soul in it that we have to journey far and wide to destroy?”

Hearing this, Squidward’s expression became blank as he placed the wastebasket over his head and fell on his back inside the front counter boat.

“Of course not.” Mr. Krabs answered SpongeBob. “What are ya? Crazy? I dropped that blasted thing under the grill years ago. It’s been sitting there ever since, and leaving a foul stench that I can smell in the air every time I walk in there.”

This was generally proven when upon closer inspection; the onion ring was covered in mold and filth from where it had been all these years.

“Anyone who brings it out here will probably leave the place needin’ to be exterminated.” Mr. Krabs explained with his voice becoming distressed. “And do ya know how much that’s gonna cost me!” he then ran all the way back to his office. “Just put that in the cellar and never speak of it again!”

As SpongeBob stood there with a baffled expression as he held the moldy onion ring, Patrick suddenly came in out of nowhere with his usual dim smile.

“I’m back.” He said before spotting in the onion ring, snatching it out of SpongeBob’s hand, and eating it in one bite.

The End

[Wumbo]

Great ending to a great spin-off!

[TJ]

Agreed. You did extremely well with this story Negi .