Popular Post Old Man Jenkins Posted October 15, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted October 15, 2013 Banner made by ChaA short story/spin-off thingy I just wrote for the hell of it, and I guess this convo I had with Cha one time about writing something like this. So I guess this goes out to her mostly, but hopefully others like it too. This wasnt one of the things I had planned for O(MJ)ctober, but yeah, why not. SpongeBob awoke one morning to the sound of his alarm blaring as it usually. Wide awake, he shuts it off and gets up from bed in nothing but his underwear. SpongeBob: Good morning world and all who inhabit it! As he blurts this out, his blanket wraps itself around him, causing him to panic and fall into his clock before plummeting down the stairs. This was the usual morning routine for SpongeBob and no matter how many it ew he goes through this, the blanket still catches him by surprise. After that terror is over, he heads on out to the living room, turns the TV on and whip up some leftover Krabby Patties for breakfast. Gary: Meow. Gary utters out, hungry next to his empty food bowl as if to imply to SpongeBob that he's hungry. SpongeBob: Sorry, Gare Bear, how could I forget the most important meal of the day! SpongeBob grabs Gary's food bowl and rushes to the cupboard, grabbing a can of Gary's favorite Snail-Po. The microwave sounds off, his Krabby Patty all heated up and ready to be eaten. SpongeBob rushes to get his meal, but through his confusion, keeps the Snail-Po for himself and gives the patty to Gary. SpongeBob: Servin' it up Gary's way! Bop. SpongeBob immediately takes a huge bite out of the Snail-Po without looking. SpongeBob: BLEGH! SpongeBob spends the next half hour in the bathroom as Gary munches down on his delicious morsel. SpongeBob leaves the bathroom after flushing four times. SpongeBob: Never thought I'd ever say this, but that was the worst Krabby Patty I've ever eaten! SpongeBob exclaimed to Gary, but like the whole blanket and clock routine, it was apart of his daily morning ritual as well. Gary had already finished his meal and was just sitting in front of the TV watching the morning news. Perch Perkins: Perch Perkins here for KRUV, live from the royal palace, where we will receive an update on King Neptune's missing- SpongeBob turned the TV off, getting ready to head out the door. Gary: Meow. Gary blurted out in an annoyed tone, implying that he was watching that, but SpongeBob was already out the door and heading towards Patrick's rock. Just steps away from his pineapple. SpongeBob: I hope Patrick is as ready and excited as I am! Teeeheee! He busts out his jelly fishing net and knocks a few times on Patrick's rock, but gets no answer. He knocks again, but still gets no answer. SpongeBob: Boy, I sure hope Patrick remembers to get dressed today. We can't have a repeat of him last time...in the nuuuude. He knocks a third time and gets the bejeebers scared out of him as Patrick's rock swings open as he does so. SpongeBob: Great merciful Neptune, Patrick! You scared the bejeebers outta me. Patrick: Ohoheehoheehuhoheeee! Patrick was giggling to himself, holding a seemingly cardboard box in his hands, failing to really notice SpongeBob. SpongeBob: Patrick? Patrick?? PATRICK? Patrick snaps out of his fit. Patrick: Oh, hiya SpongeBob! Fancy seeing you here this morning. SpongeBob: Patrick, we sorta had plans to go jelly fishing down at Jellyfish Fields. Patrick: Oooh, it musta slipped my mind. SpongeBob: It's alright, pal! You fitting to get ready before we go? Patrick: Oh, this is all I'll need! SpongeBob: You keeping your net in there or something? Patrick: Nope! After an awakened couple of seconds, SpongeBob finally asks SpongeBob: So what is it? Patrick tried hard to contain his giggles Patrick: It's a secret. SpongeBob: Secret, huh? You have some super net in there you plan on surprising me with. Patrick: Mehbeh. SpongeBob: Really? Patrick: No! After some more awkward silence, Patrick finally peels himself off his rock and darts down the road with his secret box. Patrick: Come on, SpongeBob! We should be getting to Jellyfish Fields. SpongeBob scratches his head, pondering as to what the contents of the box could be. SpongeBob: That Patrick sure is something else. And SpongeBob proceeds to jog after him. At Jellyfish Fields, SpongeBob gets his jelly on by putting on his eyeglasses and going out on the hunt while Patrick just plops his but down on the grass and plays around with his box. He opens it, whispers to himself and giggles some more and closes it before rinsing and repeating again. SpongeBob: DA DA DA DA DUM! SpongeBob cries out as he pounces on his purple jelly prey, but misses it. He waits for Patrick to make his move on the jelly, but finally notices Patrick sitting down and playing with his box. SpongeBob: Boy, Patrick sure is having fun with that box. His imagination must be bursting today. SpongeBob takes a tighter glance at Patrick and notices him appearing as if he's stroking whatever's in the box. SpongeBob goes up to his friend. SpongeBob: Hey Patrick, you missed your cue back there. This startles Patrick as he quickly shuts the lid onto the box, something he can't quite do with a jar. Patrick: SpongeBob! How many times do I have to tell you, no peeking into my secret box! SpongeBob: You only told me just this once. Patrick: Oh. SpongeBob: And you missed your cue out there, buddy. These jellies aren't going to catch themselves, and it's really no fun jellyfishing by yourself, neither. Patrick: Oh give me that. Patrick opens his box slightly, taking out a pair of eyeglasses and puts them on. Patrick: See, I can wear glasses too. He yanks the net from SpongeBob's hand before going to show him how it's done, leaving his box behind. SpongeBob glances down at the box, then to Patrick, back down at the box, and back up to Patrick. He contemplates sneaking a peek for himself while Patrick is distracted. SpongeBob begins to sweat nervously, glancing back at Patrick, who's still jellyfishing, before kneeling down towards the box. Patrick: Caught one! SpongeBob's heart skips a beat or two as he looks back to see Patrick right behind with a jellyfish caught in his net. Patrick: Heeeyyy, what are you doing down there. SpongeBob: I was... Thinking fast, he quickly untied his shoes before tying them up again. SpongeBob: Just tying my shoes! See, haha. Patrick: That's a funny way of tying your shoes. Patrick points down at SpongeBob's hands, having tied his fingers up instead. SpongeBob: Dahahaha, silly me. He laughs it off nervously as he ties his shoes the right way. SpongeBob: But hey, look! You caught a jelly! Patrick: SpongeBob, there's nothing in this huge ocean that I can't catch. SpongeBob: You can say that again. Patrick: All this jellyfishing has me starved! Lets eat. Patrick gives SpongeBob his net back, picks up his box and starts heading towards the direction of the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob follows suit. Patrick: Good morning, Krusty Krew! Patrick blurted out as he entered the restaurant. SpongeBob: The partay has arrived! Squidward let out a long and loud sigh behind the counter. Squidward: Neptune, kill me now. SpongeBob and Patrick approach the counter to make the orders. Squidward: SpongeBob, how am I suppose to enjoy your one day off of the year when you just show up to work anyway?! SpongeBob: I can never spend a day away from here, Squidward! You know that. Squidward: I refuse to offer you two dunder heads any service whatsoever. Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward! Squidward: What is it now, Mr. Krabs? Mr. Krabs: Remember, P . O . O . P. Squidward: How could I forget, it's what we serve here. What can I get you two dunder heads, today? SpongeBob: I'll have- Patrick: I'll have a, a...uh, uhhhhhhhhhhh Squidward: Mr. Krabs, he's doing it again! Mr. Krabs: Think for the customer, boy, or you're fired. SpongeBob: Psst, Patrick. Why not order a Krabby Patty? Patrick: That's a great idea! Two Krabby Patties, please. One for me, and one for my friend here. Mr. Krabs: See, the little yella guy's got it down! SpongeBob: Aww Patrick, you're actually treating for once? Patrick: Oh, the other patty isn't for you. I'll go get us a table! And Patrick went to do that with his box in tow. SpongeBob: I'll just have the usual. Squidward: One Crying Johnny on the Barn. Thank you for choosing to spend your money at the Krusty Krab, Farmer Brown. Squidward went back to reading his 50 Tentacles of Grey behind the counter. SpongeBob: Aren't you gonna- Squidward: I was told to offer you service, not excellent service. Suddenly, Mr. Krab's super sniffer of a nose started to bother him. Mr. Krabs: What's that smell? A little...smelly smell. A smell thaaaaaats...smelly. Mr. Squidward, what did I tell ye about this bowl of onions?! After about three hours of waiting for their order, they finally consume to their heart's content. SpongeBob notices Patrick "feeding" one of his Krabby Patties to whatever he had inside the box. He whispers to it some more before giving it what looked like a kiss before closing the lid. Patrick: Boy, that sure did hit the spot! I've gotta poop out some of that P . O . O . P. you mind dumping the trash for me, SpongeBob? SpongeBob: Sure thing, pal- But Patrick had already made his way into the little tadpole's room, leaving his secret box behind. SpongeBob once again contemplated sneaking a peek before going to dump their trash away. Squidward: Alright, which one of you dolts left this box here?! You two are always making my job harder than it already is! Squidward goes to pick up the box, but gets surprised when a pink mass grabs him by the tentacle and bends it back. Patrick: DON'T TOUCH THE BOX! Squidward shrieks in pain before he gets thrown right through the table to the left of him. Mr. Krabs: Arrr! What be the meanin' of this tomfoolery?! Krabs notices Patrick breathing heavily, standing over Squidward as he lay in the table rubble and back away into his office Mr. Krabs: I saw nothin. SpongeBob just stood there in shock as Patrick simply picked up his box and left the premises. SpongeBob gives chase, but not before giving Squidward the money for the meal. SpongeBob: Patrick, wait for me! Krabs walked back out of his office and approached Squidward. Mr. Krabs: Status report, Mr. Squidward! Squidward: Ow...my aching testicles... Mr. Krabs: Not that! About me- He notices the money SpongeBob left behind on the crown of Squidward's head. Mr. Krabs: MONEY! Krabs picks up the money and fondles it before heading back into his office. Mr. Krabs: Clean up this mess, Mr. Squidward. I'm taking these damages outta yer paycheck. SpongeBob finally catches up to Patrick on their way home and tried stopping. SpongeBob: Patrick, we need to talk. Patrick: About what? SpongeBob: About this whole secret box business. Patrick: There's nothing to talk about. SpongeBob: But Patrick, you almost took Squidward's arm off and left him in a pile of rubble! Patrick: Then he shouldn't have tried to look in my secret box! SpongeBob: He wasn't going even going to, Pat. He mistook it for trash- Patrick: Then it was a good thing I stopped em! SpongeBob: Look Pat, I'm your friend, your best friend. You don't have to keep secrets of any sort from me. Patrick: Oh! Is that so? SpongeBob: Of course so! Patrick: I find that hard to believe. SpongeBob: How so? Patrick: It's not like you tell me any secrets of your's. SpongeBob: *gasps* Take that back! Patrick: Liar, liar, plants for hire! SpongeBob: That's pants on fire, Patrick. And you wanna know some of my dirty secrets, well I'll tell ya! Patrick: Well then I'm all ears! Or no ears. SpongeBob: Sometiiiiimes...I can be a lil bit naïve. Patrick: Tell me something I don't know. SpongeBob: I can be a lil OCD, too! Patrick: That's the opposite of dirty. I think. SpongeBob: I watch Anemones Gone Wild at late night! Patrick: Now that's dirty, all right. SpongeBob: And I wear three pairs of underwear just in case I make an accident right now! SpongeBob pulls them out from his pants to prove it. Patrick: The mechanations of my mind are an enigma. You just wouldn't understand. SpongeBob: I would too understand! Patrick: Look, I've got plans for tonight. Just drop it, alright! Don't go digging anymore than you have to. Patrick retreated back under his rock with his secret box, leaving SpongeBob to head back home alone. SpongeBob spent the rest of the afternoon and well into the evening in his study, pondering just what Patrick is keeping secret inside that box. He paced around the room, glancing out the window towards Patrick's house as night fell on Bikini Bottom. He didn't keep his eyes off the window. It was getting later into the night, much later, and Patrick had yet to leave his home for these supposed "plans". SpongeBob kept himself awake all the way until 3 AM, when Patrick finally left his home. SpongeBob: I never took you for a night owl, Patrick. Patrick was dressed in a suit for an occasion. He made sure his rock was secured before walking down the road and into the dark of night. He didn't have his box with him. It was now or never for SpongeBob, so he chose now thinking he could get in and out before Patrick made it back from his occasion. Donning a pair of his mother's pantyhose, SpongeBob snuck out of his house and towards Patrick's. Tiptoeing to the rock, he tried opening it but it was locked tight. He thought quick and pulled out his Glove Multitool from Glove World, using it to easily get passed the locks and finally into Patrick's humble abode, which was everything but as he pulled out his trusty Glove Light to see into the darkness under the rock. SpongeBob: Barnacles, Patrick. I know you do nothing more than the next guy in Bikini Bottom, but I didn't think your home would be this messy. Patrick's home looked to be in quite the state of disarray. His bed was unkempt, clothes and various food littered the floor, some of his crudely made sand furniture and photographs were damaged. SpongeBob scoured the place for a 20 minutes, trying to locate the box, but had no such luck in finding it. He tried to be quiet, but every step he made felt like an earthquake, every drop of sweat he perspirated felt like a tsunami, and the crap everywhere didn't make things any easier. SpongeBob: Your secret's safe for now, Patrick Conceding defeat, SpongeBob went to exit the rock when he took a good listen around the house. He could hear what sounded like music playing. He tried his damnedest to pinpoint the location, but no matter how close he felt he got, it still seemed far away. He took another good listen again, closing his eyes to visualize and better pinpoint it. SpongeBob: It sounds as if it's coming from...right below me... He shined his glove light at the floor, looking for a way down since he always assumed Patrick's rock was just one story. He digs through all the crap and only hits the rug. SpongeBob: Tartar sauce! SpongeBob was just about to give up and leave, feeling he had stayed there longer than expected, but a thought occurred to him. He shined his glove light back on the rug before lifting it up out of the way, revealing a secret hatch. SpongeBob: Knick knack, the patty's back! He used his glove Multitool to unlock the hatch to find a flight of stairs that went deeper down under the home. SpongeBob gulped at the sight in fright, as well as smelling something foul down below. SpongeBob: That ain't your average, everyday darkness down there. That's just...advanced darkness. Mustering up all the courage he has in his porous body, he descended the flight of stairs with his glove light in hand. When he reached the bottom, he found himself in a long, dark hallway. The music has become much more easy to hear. SpongeBob looked down hallway to see a dim light emanating from behind a partially open door. SpongeBob: A secret room for a secret box, so fitting. SpongeBob proceeded down the hallway with caution. The smell got stronger and the music becomes more and more audible the closer he gets to the door. So much so, he could make it out to be "Put You Head On My Shoulder" by Paul Anka. Song: Put your head on my shoulder. Hold me in your arms, baby. Squeeze me oh so tight. Show me that you love me too. He pushed the door open ever so slowly and found himself in a room lit only by candlelight. He closed the door behind him and looked around to also see fried oyster skin air fresheners hanging from the ceiling. The room was just as dirty as the rest of the house, moreso even. SpongeBob continued looking around the room. Song: Put your lips next to mine, dear. Won't you kiss me once, baby. Just a kiss goodnight, may be you and I will fall in love. SpongeBob: There you are, you slippery thing, you! Song: People say that love's a game, a game you just can't wiiiiin. He caught sight of the box, sitting atop a desk that was fashioned into looking like an altar of some sort. He approached it slowly, his heart pounding from the anticipation. He set his glove light on the table next to it, grabbing the lid and opening it up ever so slowly. SpongeBob: Lets see what's so secret about this box, Patrick. Song: If there's a way, I'll find it someday, and then this fool with rush iiiiiin! SpongeBob proceeds to yank the lid of with great force, tossing it onto the floor before letting his eyes scour the contents of the box. SpongeBob: ALRIGHT PATRICK! LETS SEE THE SECRET! SHOW ME THE SECRET SHOW ME THE SECRET SHOW ME THE SECRET SHOW ME THE SECRE- SpongeBob's eyes suddenly fell back into their sockets. His face grew paler and paler as he slowly came to the realization as to what he peeking into. He was frozen still with fright, he tried to scream something out but couldn't muster it, he was caught in his breath. He collapsed down to the floor, still holding the box in his hands, still looking into it. SpongeBob: DAAAAAHHHHH!! He finally let out one loud scream before finally summoning the strength to toss the box to the side, the contents rolling out of it as it landed. SpongeBob grabbed his glove light from the table and shined it where the box landed. He looked on in horror at the disembodied green humanoid head that Patrick had kept in the box this whole time. The head looked to be that of a females, it had long hair and glasses on. The same glasses Patrick used to jellyfish with earlier in the day. SpongeBob: Oh dear Neptune! Song: Put your head on my shoulder! Whisper in my ear, baby. Words I want to hear. Tell me, tell me that you love me too. SpongeBob cried out before scurrying up to get out of the room. In his fright, he bursted through a second door that was located in the room that led into what looked to be a second bathroom. He shined his glove light into the room to see crimson red water in the bathtub. The tub was surrounded by various tools. SpongeBob stepped closer to get a better look in the tub only to find the headless body of what looked to be a mermaid floating in it. SpongeBob let out a scream before backing out of the room. His glove light shines onto something behind him as SpongeBob backs into it. Patrick: Hey buddy, I warmed it up for ya. A pink mass overwhelms SpongeBob as the glove light breaks. SpongeBob's screams for his life, going unheard, as morning dawns on Bikini Bottom. Gary watches the morning news. Perch Perkins: We still have no updates as to the whereabouts of King Neptune's daughter, Mindy, last seen three nights ago during an unsupervised tour visit to the city in order to mingle with her loyal subjects, but we here at KRUV will continue to follow this story as more news breaks and comes to light. 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cha Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 Not going to cry, not going to cry, not going to cry. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Car Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 Beautiful in the most twisted way. Damn good job sir. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sauce Mama Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 That ending was perfect oh my god xD 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
E.V.I.L. Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 Not going to cry, not going to cry, not going to cry. Dunno about you, but I kept uttering this the minute I saw "stroking the box?"/ Not going to cry, not going to cry, not going to cry. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MMM Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 Good job! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Jenkins Posted October 17, 2013 Author Share Posted October 17, 2013 The day before... It was late in the afternoon at the palace of King Neptune. The king was getting his daily scalp massage in his throne room as Princess Mindy stood by, wearing sunglasses to protect her eyes from the glaring ray of light that that reflects off her father's "thinning" head. Neptune: Mindy, no going out. That's final! Mindy: But daddy, how am I ever supposed to take over the kingdom one day if I don't even get to know the people I'll be ruling over. How will I ever find a prince to help rule over your kingdom. Neptune: Simple, you just sit around on your throne looking pretty like I do. And I can always arrange a marriage for you, then again, true love is overrated. Mindy: Tsk daddy. Neptune: Darling, you have to understand that I'm only doing this for your own good. Mindy: That's what every overbearing father says during situations like these. How exactly is keeping me prisoner here for my own good? It's like you don't even trust me. Neptune: Mindy, it's not that I don't trust you. It's, it's, it's people I don't trust. Mindy: You don't trust the people you're ruling over? Neptune: It's hard to explain, sweetie. It's just time's have changed, and people change. Things are much different now than when I was your age all those years ago. Back then, we were absolute, people didn't dare oppose us. Nowadays, you have uprisings here and revolutions there. People don't respect power and authority anymore. Look what's going on in Eqypt and Syria, look what happened to Gaddafi for my sake. Mindy: Now you're just being ridiculous. Neptune: I also gave this freedom to your brother and, well, look how that turned out for him. Mindy: Dad, I am nothing like Triton! Neptune: I know, and I'm oh so proud of you for that. You're have a good head on your shoulders, Mindy. I know your heart is in the right place. But, you're the last heir,the last child, I have left. If you were to get caught up in anything, or I forbid, anything were to happen to you I- I...just don't know what I'd do. Mindy: Oh daddy. She gives her father a hug. Mindy: You worry your bald head too much. Neptune: It's not bald! It's just...thinning...Anywho, you should get swimming to your room, missy. This is enough talk about freedom for one evening. Mindy: But daddy?! Neptune: No buts, Mindy! We merpeople have no butts! Now go along, swim to your room. Mindy heads up to her room in the west wing of the palace, disappointed that her umpteenth attempt to convince her father to allow her more leeway has once again fallen on deaf ears. Not willing to take the oppression anymore, she resolved to sneak out past her 6:30 PM curfew, when her father was too preoccupied with pining for the glory days of his once voluminous hair in the mirror. Throwing on a hoodie to help conceal her identity, she swam out of her window and into the quiet town of Bikini Bottom. She caught sight of a young boy out in the increasingly dark streets, crying to himself. She swam to him and offered a shoulder to put his head on. Mindy: What's the matter, little boy? Little Boy: *sniff* My mommy let me go out to play at the park on my own, but *sniff* I can't find my way back home. Can you help me? Mindy: Of course I will! Can you tell me where exactly you live? Little Boy: I live in a house. Mindy: I'm gonna need to go off more than that, buddy. Little Boy: It's a small house. Mindy: An address, perhaps? Little Boy: Hmmm, 45...123 Coral Street. Mindy: Then I can definitely help you out, little guy! It's getting pretty dark out. You should probably hold my hand, just to be safe. The boy grabbed hold of her hand and, using her knowledge of the layout of Bikini Bottom from studying every nook and cranny of it for her future reign, led the boy safely back to his house. His mother showered the undercover princess with gratitude, the little boy, who's name was Billy, even gave her one of his four muffins so now he only has three. Mindy ventured out onto the streets, eventually coming across a woman's cry for help. She saw a somewhat old pufferfish standing beneath a sizable tree. Mindy: What's troubling you, ma'am? Mrs. Puff: I just took my eyes off my snail for a couple of minutes and the next thing I know, she's gotten herself stuck up a tree! Please, you have to help me get her down! I've had her since I was a little girl and I'd hate to think that THIS will be the end of her world! Mindy: Don't worry, I'll get your snail down for you, ma'am. Mindy ascended up off the ground and to the top of the tree, grabbing hold of Mrs. Puff's pet before floating gently back down and returning her to her owner. Mrs. Puff: Oh thank you, thank you! I can't thank you enough. Mindy: Don't worry yourself, ma'am. It was really no problem, anything to help people out. Mrs. Puff: This is the first AND last time I take you out without your leash, Snellie. Have a pleasant evening, stranger. Mindy: Thanks! You too. Mindy continued to make her way around town, eventually coming across the Krusty Krab. Mindy: Home of the world-famous Krabby Patty. I always wanted to try one of those. She proceeded to enter the restaurant, taking in the feel of things. People were eating peacefully around her, getting their fill. This was a pretty big difference from the usual huge, empty dining hall that she is accustomed to at the palace. She approached the counter, standing in the back of line behind a pink starfish, who was about to place his order. Squidward: Oh terrific. Sigh, what can I not get for you today, Patrick? Patrick: I'll have a, a...uh, uhhhhhhhhh... Squidward: Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs was chewing up some food for an old lady without teeth before spitting it on her face. Mr. Krabs: Think for the customer! Before Squidward could bang his head against cashy, Mindy put a hand on Patrick's shoulder and said something in his ear. Mindy: Why not get what I'm getting, a Krabby Patty? Patrick: That's not a bad idea! Two Krabby Patties please. One for me, and one for my friend here. Squidward: Oh joy, more morons. Now will that be cash or credit- D'OH! Patrick: A, a...uh, uhhhhhhhhhhh... Mindy: Haha, don't worry. I got this one, dude. Mindy proceeded to give Squidward two royal gold doubloons to pay for the food. Squidward: What the?! Are these even real? Mindy winked at him. Mindy: Keep it between us, pleeeease. Squidward bowed his head. Squidward: But of course, your majesty. I'll have your food out right away! Squidward proceeded to shout through the kitchen window. Squidward: SpongeBob, two Krabby Patties! And make it snappy! SpongeBob: Aye aye, Squidward! Patrick finally turned around to look at this kind stranger, but he skipped a beat as he caught sight of her. Patrick's knees started to get weak, shivers went up and down his spine, his chest was pounding and he started to sweat profusely. Patrick: Dawww, hiiiiiii. Mindy let out a few chuckles before blushing a bit. Mindy: Hi yourself. Patrick just went awkwardly silent and they both stood there for about a minute, awkwardly. Mindy: I better go get a table- Patrick: You wanna see my underwear?! Mindy: Pardon? Patrick: Uhhhh, heyyyy...punk. Hehe. Mindy giggled a bit more. Mindy: You have yourself a goodnight, alright- Patrick: You wanna see my jellyfish? Mindy: Your jellyfish? Patrick: Well, not THAT kinda jellyfish. This kind. Patrick pulled out a jar with a jellyfish in it. Mindy: Well hi there, lil guy. Patrick: Hey, it's not little...much. Mindy: You're quite the card, Patrick- Oh! Patrick: Hey, how'd ya know my name? Mindy: You just sorta...look like a Patrick...to me... Patrick: I always thought I looked more like a Stefan more than anything, but I guess Patrick will do. Mindy: Oh Patrick, silly Patrick. Patrick: That's mah name, don't wear it out! Ahahaha! Really you can't, cuz it's not clothes. Mindy: Say, you wanna eat your Krabby Patty with me? We can keep each other company, you know. Patrick's heart just stopped at that suggestion. Patrick: Well, I was waiting for SpongeBob to get off his shift, but what the Locker! They picked a table and sat across each other. Patrick continued to show her his jellyfish. Patrick: I just caught em today. Fitting to keep it as a pet to keep my company at homes hole I'm alone doing nothing. Mindy: But Patrick, it's a wild animal. You can't keep it locked up in a jar like that forever. It deserves to be free, to mingle amongst its own kind. Patrick: Well, now that you put it that way. I can sorta remember having a pet jellyfish didn't turn out so swell for SpongeBob. Mindy: Then it'd probably be for the better if you just let it go now. Patrick: You might just be right. Patrick went to free it, but instead of putting his hand on the jar's lid, he put it on the table. Mindy: Haha, you have to open it through the lid, dude. Patrick then put his hand on his pounding chest. Mindy: The lid. Patrick then put his hand on one of Mindy's boobs. Mindy: Very funny. THE. LID. Patrick then placed his hand on his face. Mindy: Hahaha, you're liking this, aren't you? Patrick: Mehbeh. Mindy: Here, I'll help you. She placed one hand on the jar and her other hand on Patrick's hand. He leads it over the lid and assists him with turning it left, eventually popping the lid off the top and freeing the jellyfish. Patrick: Oh no, we broke it! Patrick was about to put on the water works. Mindy: No! No! We just opened it, silly. See, the jellyfish is free now. Mr. Krabs: Ah! Who let that wild animal in here?! Shoo! GIT! We don't serve you kind here! Scram! Squidward: Your dinner, is served! Your majesty. Mindy: Why thank you! Patrick: Yeah, I'm starved! Patrick proceeded to down his meal in one gulp. Mindy giggled some more before taking small bites out of her patty. Mindy: Oh dear Neptune! Patrick: What is it, my ange- er, angle! What is it, my angle? Mindy: This might just be...the best thing...that I've ever tasted. Patrick: Can I keep you. Mindy: What was that? Patrick: Yeah, SpongeBob sure knows how to flip that meat! Mr. Krabs: Alright ye lily-livered polliwogs! It's 9 o'clock, closing time! Now GIT! Ye don't pay me electric bills! Krabs began shutting off all the lights and ushering people, still eating, out the door as Mindy realizes something. Mindy: 9 PM already?! I have to go! Patrick: So soon? The night is still a, a...uh, uhhhhhh... Mindy: I'm sorry, Patrick. Patrick: But I didn't even get your name. Patrick grabbed hold of her hand. Mandy: I'm sorry, but I have to get going before he finds out. Patrick: "He"? Patrick asked softly, his heart dropping as he lets go of Mindy's hand, allowing her to leave. Mr. Krabs: You too, pinky! Lets go! Mindy rushes through the streets, trying to make it back to her palace before her father finishes pining for his hair and checks up on her. She reaches the intersection of Conch and Coral as a huge blow is dealt to her head. She immediately crashes to the pavement hard, losing consciousness as a huge silhouette, illuminated by the streetlight above them, begins to loom over her. She regains consciousness finding herself in what looks like a house. She lays on a sand sofa as she looks around at her surroundings, noticing sand furniture everywhere. She gets up and tries to find a way out but there's no doors or window. The living room is dimly lit by the static on the television set. A rustle could be heard coming from what seemed to be the kitchen. Patrick: Hey, you're awake! Mindy: Patrick, where am I? Patrick: Welcome to my humble commode. You took a pretty nasty fall out there when I found ya. I don't know where you live and I hate doctors, so I just took you back here to be safe. Mindy: I really should be getting back home- Patrick: Nuh uh, you're not fit to be out there at this time of night. You should still be under my care. Mindy: Patrick, please- Patrick: PATRICK ISN'T HERE! Mindy:...Look, I'm fine, see? I feel good enough to go, and I thank you for that, really. So please- Patrick: Then it looks like I'm just gonna have to hit you in the head with two coconuts. Patrick took out two coconuts from behind his back and pounced towards Mindy. She managed to dodge out of his way, causing him to crash into some of his furniture. She makes a mad dash up, trying to push up against the rock to get it to open, but Patrick grabs her by her tailfin and starts flinging her around the room, against walls and furniture, creating a huge mess once he finally slammed her against the ground. She bare remains conscious as Patrick brings the two coconuts down on her head, knocking her out once again. A few hours goes by before she finally regains consciousness inside a dark room, lit only by candle light. She stirs around, but finds herself strapped down to a crudely-made makeshift bed. She tilts her head to the right to see Patrick in his Goofy Goober underwear, fiddling around with something. He turns around facing towards Mindy, revealing a hammer in hand. Patrick: You came to just in time. Mindy: Patrick, what is this? What do you think you're doing?! Patrick: What does it look like, angel? I'm about to hammer you. Mindy: Patrick- Patrick: PATRICK ISN'T HERE! Mindy: Please don't do this...please! Please stop and think about you're doing. An alarm clock goes off. He stops it. Patrick: Oh boy, 3 AM! Patrick proceeded to play around with a radio on a nearby table. It started to play "After The Lovin" by Englebert Humperdinck. Song: So I sing you to sleep after the lovin' with a song I just wrote yesterday. And I hope you can hear what the words and the music have to say. Mindy: Don't do this, please. PLEASE! Patrick pounced onto the bed, right on top of her. Song: It's so hard to explain everything that I'm feelin', face to face I just seem to go dry. Patrick hesitates a bit before laying his face down on Mindy's and locking lips with her. She struggles and tries to snap at Patrick but he hold her head down. Her screams are muffled as Patrick gets back up and lays the hammer down on her strapped hand, her screams echoing through the room but not quite loud enough to reach out for help. Patrick's eyes rolls to the back of his head as she screams in pain. Song: But I love you so much that the sound of your voice can get me high. Patrick begins hammering away on her some more with much fury. Song: Thanks for takin' me on a one way trip to the sun. And thanks for turnin' me into someone. Patrick locks lips with her again, this time having his way. He brushes the ruffled hair away from her face and looks down upon her lovingly. Tears run down Mindy's face. Song; So I sing you to sleep after the lovin'! I brush back the hair from your eyes.And the love on your face is so real that it makes me want to cry. Patrick hammers her again repeatedly, blood splattering everywhere. Song: And I know that my song isn't sayin' anything new. Oh, but after the lovin', I'm still in love with you. Patrick reaches behind his back, pulling a hatchet out from his underwear. He raises it high above his head. Mindy musters up whatever breath she can to get Patrick to stop. He brings it down with great force. Song: Yes, after the lovin'. I'm still in love with you. Patrick raises the hatchet a second time and takes it down even harder. He tosses it to the side and picks up something from the bed. He brings it to the table and places it in a box. Song: Hmmm, after the lovin' I'm still in love with you. As morning came to pass, a couple of knocks are heard. SpongeBob: Boy, I sure hope Patrick remembers to get dressed today. We can't have a repeat of him last time...in the nuuuude. He knocks a third time and gets the bejeebers scared out of him as Patrick's rock swings open as he does so. SpongeBob: Great merciful Neptune, Patrick! You scared the bejeebers outta me. Patrick: Ohoheehoheehuhoheeee! Patrick was giggling to himself, holding a seemingly cardboard box in his hands. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sauce Mama Posted October 17, 2013 Share Posted October 17, 2013 Sick. Twisted. That was flippin great. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cha Posted October 17, 2013 Share Posted October 17, 2013 *gulp* well uh um heh... yeah... Well.... That was incredible. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moar Boy Posted October 18, 2013 Share Posted October 18, 2013 That was AWESOME, but twisted, still it's great. I should visit spin-off and lit more often 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cha Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 As you may or may not know, Jenkins planned on only doing two episodes. But he kindly allowed me to have rights for this, so I now humbly bring you the next episode! The Next Day Perch Perkins: Four days ago, King Neptune's daughter Mindy went missing while visiting her loyal subjects. Yet, not a single trace was found out on where she went or potentially who could have stolen the princess. The case has been overlooked by royal SWAT team of Neptune himself. More news to come as the scoop of the century rages on. King Neptune's castle was buzzing with people coming in and out. The king himself was commanding out orders left and right while talking with the chief of the SWAT crew, Richard J. Middleson. Chief Middleson: So your majesty I've found- King Neptune: YOU! WORKER! Recheck the streets for potential evidence of thumbprints of adults ages 20-54. He turns to another SWAT member. King Neptune: YOU! Contact every member who has lived in this town over the past decade. And then try everyone who has lived here this century. Chief Middleson: Your majesty if I may-? Swat member: Your majesty, someone is asking if the press would be allowed to film here right now for the latest info on the case. King Neptune: Tell those pathetic slaves to get out here immediately or suffer the wrath of my own media. He pulls out his trident and points it at the Swat member. Swat member:.... will do... sir... Chief of SWAT: Your majesty- King Neptune: WHAT? He points the trident now at the chief who cowards in fear. King Neptune: Oh heh heh, sorry. Carry on what you were saying. Chief Middleson: ....Your majesty if I may ask, have all the witnesses who had contact with the princess have finally responded and given investigated full report on the event. The chief is holding a stack of files of each Bikini Bottomite that night. King Neptune: Well that's the most wonderful news I've heard all week. Anyone say anything of interest? Chief Middleson: All of them said pretty much the same thing, they had help from the princess between 6-9 PM and didn't know where she went as her last stop. King Neptune: Why that's prepounderous! What citizen doesn't know where she went when she left them? Chief Middleson: They all said she was in a black hoodie and left as soon as she helped them. King Neptune: And there wasn't anyone around else? Chief Middleson: It was Labor Day, mostly everyone was home since everything was closed. King Neptune: Everywhere? Chief Middleson: Well that's what the sources say. The chief lines up the folders neatly by their edges from nervousness, when all of a sudden one of them falls down the pile. The chief picks it up and carefully makes sure that everything is still alright inside it. While doing so he discovers something he did not previously notice the image of the witness that was taken the night of Mindy's disappearance. It was a worker's hat no doubt, of a restaurant he'd remembered he ate at before. Chief: Your majesty? King: Yes what is it? Chief: I think I might have found a restaurant that was open that night.... He holds up the image of the octopus and his hat uniform as the scene changes to Squidward at work before it opens. He is working at present time, cleaning off a picture on the glass door of him labeled "loser". Huff and puff Bubble(B)ass comes up to the door ready for his daily heart attack on a bun. Bubble(B)ass: Are you open? Squidward: Read the sign. He points to it labeled, "closed". Bubble(B)ass: I'll have a triple double doxie deluxe. Four by four animal style. extra shingles and- Squidward: Sorry sir we're all out. BubbleBass: Can you check? Squidward: No. Mr. Krabs comes out in a flurry from his office. Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward! Mr. Squidward! Mr. Squidward! Squidward: What? What? What? Mr. Krabs: Where's SpongeBob? I didn't see the lad roll in this morning and it's almost opening time. Squidward: Maybe he quit as an early birthday gift. Mr. Krabs: Nonsense talk, the boy wouldn't potentially be late like this. I knew I shouldn't have given him the day off yesterday. Squidward: The more days the merrier. Mr. Krabs: He probably spent the night at Patrick's and made SpongeBob almost late like last week. Sometimes that starfish ain't the greatest influence all the time on the boy. Squidward: Yeah he's a real killer alright. Squidward stares at his watch as it strikes 9 AM and immediately a line out of nowhere of customers wait to be allowed inside the Krusty Krab. Mr. Krabs gasps as he sees this. Squidward: You're not going to have a heart attack are you? Mr. Krabs: No... I am not, and I am not going frycookless either. Squidward I need you to go to SpongeBob LazyPants home and remind him about his job at once. Squidward: Oh goodie. Squidward treads walks to the square for brains' home. While doing so, he nearly bumps into a merman and accidentally knocking Squidward's hat, which he doesn't notice. Squidward: Hey, why watch where you're going buddy. He knocks on the pineapple door and calls out his name multiple times. Unknowing of the dark events that took place in that area the night before. Squidward waits five minutes with no answer. Squidward: SpongeBob, you're wanted on aisle three of the unemployment line. A few minutes later and Squidward remembers what Mr. Krabs said about that SpongeBob could have spent over the night at Patrick's. So Squidward goes over to the rock and knocks impatiently on it. After a few seconds Patrick pops out with a neck tie, giggling a bit before getting back his composure. Patrick: Yes? Squidward: Patrick do you know where SpongeBob is, I was sent to retrieve him back to work. Patrick hesitates for a brief second. Patrick: Uh.. how would I know? Squidward: Morons usually flock together. And I really don't have time for this so if you please. Patrick: Uh, he told me he'd would be out of town to with his parents today. Squidward looks at Patrick and notices the tie from his neck. Squidward: Nice tie. Patrick: Thank you. Squidward: It looks awfully familiar to SpongeBob's don't you think? Patrick: Well...he gave it to me as a gift! Yeah as a present before he left to see his grandma. Squidward: You just told me he went on a vacation with his parents. Patrick: You didn't let me finish, he's meeting his grandma too. Squidward: Normally I couldn't care less about how phony this sounds, but I have a job to get to. If you don't mind, show me where SpongeBob is- Patrick: SPONGEBOB'S NOT HERE! Patrick closes the hedge to his rock, leaving Squidward outside. Squidward: Patrick! Squidward lifts his tentacles underneath the rock and pushes up right to get it open. He jumps inside the house and looks for Patrick and/or SpongeBob. The rock inside is dimly lit, and covered in trash as usual. The song "Lovely Day" by Bill Withers is heard in the background of the home. Song: When I wake up in the mornin', love And the sunlight hurts my eyes Squidward: You two are so going to pay for this when I find you. He looks all around above and beneath the sand future using the barely visible light he saw. He decided to move stuff out of the way and while doing so, came across a box. Squidward: There's that stupid box again. He opened the box to see if there was possibly a flash light or something he could use, only to witness the two contents remaining inside. quidward must have jumped ten feet out of his skin before screaming in ultimate terror and falling on his back. His heart and mind racing at once. Song: And somethin' without warnin', love Bears heavy on my mind Doing so, the two items fell just a few feet apart from his hyperventilating frozen body. Squidward suddenly sees a large shadow over him. Patrick: Squidward, you and your body will definitely not fit in! Song: Then I look at you And the world's alright with me Patrick tries to grab Squidward by his shoulders, but misses as Squidward darts for the rock's roof to escape. He tries lifting it up with his strength left, but it barely budges. Right as he lifts enough to squeeze his body through, a hand grabs onto his leg. Song: Just one look at you And I know it's gonna be Squidward soccer kicks Patrick in his face a bunch of times. But Patrick pulls him down. Squidward tries using a karate kick he had learn previously from Sandy and SpongeBob. But he is no match for Patrick's perfect slice, which cuts off two of his arms. Song: A lovely day, lovely day lovely day lovely day, lovely day. He screams loudly and from pain, Squidward gets falls over, nearly unconscious. Squidward uses the breath still left in him to say one last thing to Patrick. Song: When the day that lies ahead of me Seems impossible to face Squidward: Patrick... why are you doing this.... Patrick: If I can't have you, or SpongeBob or Mindy or anyone as a friend, I'll have you as a trophy! See I even picked out this nice jar for you! Patrick blocks his path, holding a mayo jar over his head. Patrick: Is mayonnaise an instrument? Patrick hits Squidward over the head with the glass jar and as result, splatters over Squidward's head's killing him. Song: When someone else instead of me Always seems to know the way Patrick uses various tools to turn Squidward into like his other "friends". And afterwards after everything is cleaned up once more, Patrick sets all his "friends" on sand chairs with a dining table, and smiles at Squidward. Song: Then I look at you And the world's alright with me He sits at the left end of it and straightens his tie and asks him how it looks. Song: Just one look at you And I know it's gonna be Patrick: Dohuehehehe, why thank you Mindy, I really do think this tie from SpongeBob brings out my eyes. Song: A lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day. A merman looks around holding a Krusty Krab hat for it's owner as another day goes by without a trance of knowledge of what happened inside the home of Patrick Star. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Jenkins Posted October 22, 2013 Author Share Posted October 22, 2013 Exemplary work, chaz! I laughed, I cried! You really captured the tone the other two parts had and really went with it. And the song, bah gawd, the song...I eagerly await future installments. The Secret Box is in good hands, pun intended. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
So Sejima Posted October 22, 2013 Share Posted October 22, 2013 NO NOT THE SQUID TAKE THE SQUIRREL INSTEAD! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cha Posted October 30, 2013 Share Posted October 30, 2013 This episode is a bit shorter and different than the other ones. But will make a real difference in the long run of this spin-off I am hoping.That Same Day Richard J. Middleson of the SWAT team had an appointment to come and talk to the employee that was working at the only restaurant open the night of Mindy's disappearance. Little did Chief Middleson of the dark deed that was taking place at the same time he was at the Krusty Krab. Middleson squeeze himself through the 46,852 customers that were impatiently waiting for the KK to finally open. Not seeing the octopus in sight Middleson decided to knock owner's office. Mr. Krabs: The Krusty Krab is currently closed due to some worker technical difficulties. So you'll just have to wait for yer meal like everyone else bub.... So are you just going to buy something or stand there? Cause there's a standing fee. Chief Middleson: Oh no, I wasn't planning on buying anything. Mr. Krabs: Then git out. Chief Middleson: I don't think you understand, I'm Richard J. Middleson the head of the whole investigation of... He leans in closer and whispers to avoid any other listeners. Chief Middleson: the missing Princess Mindy. *he shows his badge* Krabs: Well why didn't ye say so! Come on in. He invites Middleson to sit across from him from his desk. Krabs: And tell me what the king's money- er worker is doing here. Chief Middleson: You see, one of your workers, Squidward Q. Tentacles was interviewed a few days ago, saying that he saw Princess Mindy himself during the night when she disappeared. But he forget to point out it was at this restaurant of yours. Krabs: Yeah I'm sure the princess of Bikini Bottom was here, don't be ridiculous. I would have known if royalty came here. Chief Middleson: That what he said, he also noted the Princess gave him two royal gold doubloons for the cash regis- Before the chief can finish that sentence, Krabs dashes to the cashier boat in hope of said currency. Krabs: Yeah I'm sure that when I look inside the cash register there will be two.... He picks them up from inside the register. He silently keeps his composure as he goes back to his office and sits down. Krabs: ahem. I believe him now... Chief Middleson: Glad we can agree on something. Where is that worker of yours anyways? It would actually be best to hear more of what happened from his point of view. Krabs: He left a couple hours ago to bring back another "employee" and hasn't come back since. Chief Middleson: Well when he does come back could you share what we explained here today with him? Krabs: Sure, but it will cost ye. Chief Middleson: You can't tax a government agent like this. Krabs: Then git out. As he left, Mr. Krabs was even in a more panic state about the swarm of hungry customers outside. Customers outside: WE WANT ONIONS, CHEESE! Another customer: It's what we wanted all along! D:< Where were his employees and what was taking them so long for Neptune's sake? Before he think about this farther, an envelope under the door. He opened it and and found a note, a letter and a message from Squidward/SpongeBob.Dear red sweaty guy, We as wurkers united have decided to go on strike against the corporate menace, with is you. We have no considerations on coming back and r gladly excepted being fired. Sincerely, Squidward Tentacles and SpongeBob SquarePants The writing was pretty sloppy, and some things were misspelled. It looked nothing like Squidward's neat cursive or SpongeBob's writing he had seen before. But Krabs was still having wet dreams over those two royal gold doubloons to notice a difference. Krabs: I do not believe this.... Those two think they can quit and leave their boss all here with a crowd of hungry customers?! Me best fry cook and... well Squidward..They have another thing comin' I'll say! Mr. Krabs decides to take matters into his own claws. He makes his way through the crowd of free loaders at the doors and swiftly walks to their homes. He first goes up to SpongeBob's door and knocks firmly on it. Mr. Krabs: You better have a good reason to leave all the customers like this boy! After a few minutes, there was still no answer. And he did the same at Squidward's with the same result. He even tried Patrick's home, but there was just a note saying he went to get more giant paper. Krabs went back to SpongeBob's one last time to a new tactic. Mr. Krabs: Okay boy, if you won't come out. I'll come in! Mr. Krabs uses his armor abs to hit SpongeBob's door and it falls inside the pineapple. Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! Squidward? Where are you boy? I have to kill whole you and Squidward for this! He looks around as he just sees just the usual furniture around. All of a sudden, Mr. Krabs hears the sound of an animal moaning. It spooks him a bit before he finds out where it is coming from. Mr. Krabs walks in SpongeBob's kitchen to see a large snail and empty cans of Snail Po. Gary: meeeeooooow Mr. Krabs: YEEAUGH! That must be SpongeBob's snail. The lad does feed him a lot. Mr. Krabs looks around the kitchen when something shiny catches his eye. He goes over to it to see that it's Gary's bowl. And inside it sees a note at the bottom. He reads it to himself. Mr. Krabs: Dear self, if Gary has finished this whole bowl of food, that must mean it's been exactly a year or as I estimated, September 3rd 2014 to restock the snail food. Hope this reminds you (me) to get more now! Sincerely, yourself aka aka? SpongeBob Mr. Krabs looks in confusion at the note and back to Gary. Mr. Krabs: Odd... There is a sudden knock on the door as Mr. Krabs still confused answers it. Mr. Krabs: That better be you two SpongeBob and Squidward or- He opens the door to see a merman fellow holding a Krusty Krab hat. ???: Hello, I believe this belonged to your employee who I saw come in this direction. Do you know where he went? Mr. Krabs: Who are you? ???: I am Triton. ------------- Late that night Patrick comes home from another glorious day having fun with his box. He pulls out a piece of giant paper from his grocery bag and begins to write with his sloppy handwriting and poor grammar.Dear diarey, patrick star here again. the past 3 days have been very unusual actually. The firest day I met a pretty mermaid named mindy while at the krusty krab for my daley patty. she was the niciest and prettyest girl I ever saw. she made my heart pound and I never even knew it could. her jokes were superb and I even got to pull some of my own that nite. (note: my jellyfish isnt little thank u) I felt I've known her my whole lafe at that point. she felt like someone I could trust like spongebob that is... until she decided to leave. now whenever spongebob leaves to work I useally can handel being home. but I could tell she would'nt come back when she left. why would she and so I decided to do what any1 else would I made them my permanent friends...and the same with spongebob and squidward. (I sent a letter to their boss as well). Patrick looks inside his box and sees the heads of his former friends look at him. Patrick looks back in horror and anger. Patrick: Don't look at me like that! It's not like I want to do this! You would all leave me if I didn't. He pauses and looks around his home. His eye catches upon a memory book of him and SpongeBob before he looks away in disgust. Patrick: I had to... He continues writing.when they knew what I did to Mindy they would have told every1 else. I saw it in there eyes, they do not under stand how it feels to loose some1 you care deeply fore heart wise. they are the ones who should be sorry. trying to peek inside mybox and ruin the only thing I have going for myself... And who cares about a stupid star? nobody ever worries about patrick an his needs. nope, it's just... "Hey Pat, you're sleeping around again at your rock?" u know no one knows how hard it feels to have frends leave you all the time for work or watever it is. I told my self that nite if no one wants to be frends with patrick or cares about he feels, then well then. I will just have to MAKE them like me. sincearly, patrick star He tosses his box to the side and crumples up his letter in frustration. He puts on his record player to calm his nerves down. Patrick: And that's what exactly I'll have to keep doing if I want to keep them.http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OLYO9Flbf14 Credit to Jenkins for the song. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sauce Mama Posted October 30, 2013 Share Posted October 30, 2013 I laughed pretty hard at this one. Great job Cha! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Jenkins Posted October 30, 2013 Author Share Posted October 30, 2013 Superb work, chaz! Glad to see somebody else thought about bringing Triton in this 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cha Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Hey you! Check out the new title card made from myself on the first post of this thread! Now on with the episode....That Same Day, September 4th, 2014 Mr. Krabs: The son to Neptune himself?! Triton: The one and only. Mr. Krabs gets on the ground sloppily kisses the royal tailfin of the prince. Triton: Dude, gross. Krabs realizes the awkwardness of the moment and gets back on his two legs. He settles a second before coughing and asking him a question. Mr. Krabs: What brings ye here oh Neptune's mon-er I mean son? Triton dusts off his leather hippy vest before answering and letting out an annoyed sigh. Triton: Like I just said like a few seconds ago, before your lack of intelligence kicked in man. I found your employee's hat from that place my old man had his birthday on the ground. He bumped into me earlier today. I thought I'd return it like for good karma or something. Mr. Krabs: Squidward's hat no doubt. Lazy ass. Triton: Not like it matters to someone like me, but like he was in a rush or something man. Mr. Krabs: To get me other lazy ass employee back probably. Both of them went missin' though. Do you by chance might know where went yer majesty? Triton: Do I look like I know where he went? Mr. Krabs: Mehbeh. Triton: Well, what's the big rush to find this guy anyways man? Mr. Krabs: He's costing me only pleasure in life, me money. Triton: Sounds like a real dilemma man. Mr. Krabs: Listen yer majesty, I don't have time to be back sassed and called "man" for the upteeth time. Me business is on the line. And not to mention I've had the royal SWAT team down me neck all day... Mr. Krabs is about to leave when Triton grabs a hold of his arm. Triton: The royal SWAT team? You mean my old man's dirty workers? Mr. Krabs: Probably. Triton: What would they possibly want with you of all people? Mr. Krabs: Do I look like I would tell ye? Triton: Mehbeh. Mr. Krabs: Me employees might be the only one to know the location of a secret case. Triton: Orly? What is it? Mr. Krabs: I don't know if I would be allowed to say it out loud... That is if you're willing to pay. Triton: Dude I'm basically the richest person in the sea besides my dad. Mr. Krabs: Ah you got me. Me employees including SpongeBob, since he was there too might know the location of Princess Mindy when she went out into town unannounced a few nights back. Therefore I have to retrieve em back from whenever the heck they might be. Triton: Princess Mindy? Mr. Krabs: The one and only. Triton's eyes grew wider as he heard this. Triton: She's....missing? Not that I care or anything. Mr. Krabs: Don't tell me the brother of the very own princess didn't know about this. Triton: Well.. uh yeah.. we don't talk much anymore... Mr. Krabs: I see... Well I'd better be goin' if I'm going to find me employees. Mr. Krabs walks out of the pineapple but then looks at SpongeBob's door he had slammed down earlier. Mr. Krabs: Woopsie... Just going to put this back up here now. Triton: Wait man! Uh, you know I could always help you find them and hopefully then find Mindy. Mr. Krabs: Oh yeah, sure help me find them me, how yer majesty? Triton: Well you said they were like missing right? How long were they then man? Mr. Krabs: Well Squidward has been for two hours while me other employee has been gone for exactly a day. Triton: That's like 24 hours then. Mr. Krabs: So? Triton: Listen old man. From what I learned at studying the police, it means that they have to find him. Since it's been like a day and he hasn't had contact with anyone from what I assume from what you are sayin'. Mr. Krabs: Well I don't know about the no contact with anyone part. Triton: Does the dude have other friends he might have seen? Mr. Krabs: Uh, there's a few from what I know. Triton: We should like see them first then. Mr. Krabs: What about the police? Triton: Oh that? I was just pulling your stubby leg, we don't need no police to do a job of immortal. Mr. Krabs: Why would I need yer help when I could go back to that captain of the SWAT and ask him. Plus possibly get a reward prize from them if we do find them. Triton: I said don't need their help. Mr. Krabs: I'm just sayin yer majesty it would be easier if I contacted them first. Now if you will- Triton grabs him by the shirt and hoists him a few inches off the ground. Triton: Listen old man, you don't understand what would happen if my dad found Mindy instead if I did. If she was going through town unannounced like you said than she clearly disobeyed my old man. And in turn her reunion home wouldn't be all hugs and kisses sugarcoated shit. Understand? Mr. Krabs was still dangling in the air as he nervously talked to the steamed up prince. Mr. Krabs: Oh hoh... Triton: You don't understand do you? Mr. Krabs: Not enough clearly. Triton sets him down on the stone steps leading to SpongeBob's door. Triton sighs before continuing. Triton: He would be pissed off the extreme end when she was returned. He would lock her up in a cage just like he did with me. Mr. Krabs: She just went out at night from what I've heard. I don't think he would do that. Triton: Than you clearly don't know my old man. He once grounded me once for fifteen months because I didn't show up for the "royal" dinner gathering. And it was not even for a special occasion. Mr. Krabs: Ouch. Triton: So that's exactly why no one should know. Mr. Krabs: Well if we are going to be interviewin' people, we better hurry up quick with this search. I have trails of hungry customers still back at me restaurant. Triton: Of course you do. Oh and I didn't catch your name dude. Mr. Krabs: Eugene Krabs, but ye may call me Mr. Krabs. Inside SpongeBob's pineapple Gary is still meowing discomfort of his over beguiling. He is meowing by the door loudly enough to get the attention of the two outside. Gary: Meeeeooooow Triton: Uh what was that? Mr. Krabs: Oh nothin' just SpongeBob's snail Jerry. Gary: Meeeoooow! Triton: He sounds in pain man. Should we check? Mr. Krabs: Oh fine. They go inside the pineapple to see the whereabouts of the snail. Gary is jumping up and down with his extended Snail Po filled belly. He points to a picture of SpongeBob on the coffee table with his eye ball. Triton: Looks he's trying to tell you something too. Mr. Krabs: Something about SpongeBob? Gary nods his head and points his other eye to a picture of Patrick. Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob and Patrick? Gary: Meeooooow. He points to a picture SpongeBob raking leafs in what appears to be fall time. And then back at the Patrick picture. Mr. Krabs: He tried to.... hit Patrick with a rake! Triton: Goodness! Gary shakes his head and showed them another picture of SpongeBob and Patrick at a fun fair booth. Mr. Krabs: .....tried to guess his weight! Once again Gary disagrees. He then goes over to the window and points to the outside world of people playing volley ball in the sun. Mr. Krabs: They're playing volley ball? Gary shakes his head in disapproval. Triton: No man, I think he meant more generic. Mr. Krabs: He took Patrick..... outside? Gary then jumps in excitement and nods. Gary: Meow Meow. Mr. Krabs: What's that Gary, SpongeBob and Patrick fell down a wishing well? Gary shakes his and let's out a disapproved meow. Triton looks at him a funny way. Mr. Krabs: Well it couldn't hurt to try... they were down there playing tag for a work shift SpongeBob was on once. He spent the whole night there with Patrick almost. Gary immediately leaped up again as Krabs was talking. Mr. Krabs: What is it? Did I say somethin'? Gary nods. Triton: down there? Mr. Krabs: tag? Gary shakes his eye stalks. Mr. Krabs: work shift? Triton: Night? Gary meows happily at this and motions for more with his head. Triton: Uhh? Gary thrusts his eye to the picture of Patrick again. Triton: SpongeBob and Patrick, night. Patrick night? Mr. Krabs looks puzzled for a second but then lights up as he realizes the answer. Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob and Patrick spent the night at Patrick's? Gary nods one last time before letting out a final say. Gary: Meeeeeeeoooow! Gary tries to sliver in a panic to the bathroom in the living room. Both men are confused, but don't question it. Mr. Krabs: I just knew it! SpongeBob did had a sleep over at Patrick's like I thought earlier this morning! Aye so what do you say? Triton: What do I say? What are we waiting for? Then let's go over to that dude's house man. Mr. Krabs: I've tried, there's nobody there. Triton: Damn. Mr. Krabs: Well now the questioner still remains, where did they go afterwards? Triton then gives Mr. Krabs another idea he learned from the police men. They shouldn't just check these houses, they should check all the other friends and other people SpongeBob and others talk to regularly. They leave the house quickly without another word. Right as they do so, Gary comes out of the bathroom in a panic looking for the long ridden ones. It is revealed inside the bathroom that Gary had taken the bag of fresh snail litter and used it to write letters. The letters would have finished the sentence Gary was miming out to the two. SpongeBob and Patrick. Patrick night. And these letters were a word, a simple but horrifying word.MURDER He goes up to the window and meows in hopes of them coming back. Behind Gary the door opens and someone does come back, but neither Krabs or Triton. The shadow of the figure goes over the unsuspecting snail before viciously grabbing hold of it. ???: A sleep over! Oh boy oh boy. This will be great Gary. We can stay up all night and watch scary movies and eat popcorn... Krabs rides inside Triton's Underwater Heartbreaker. Triton is driving a fast yet smooth 60 an hour. Mr. Krabs is holding on the sides of the seat with his claws to hold himself from flying forward. Triton cranks up the tunes on the radio.http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-PkeCUgqPpk Mr. Krabs: So exactly what are you going to do with Mindy once we find- Another car approaches them with a punk rock guy and his girlfriend. They rev up their engine before Eugene can finish up his sentence. The guy: Hey you two must be lost, Doofus Drive is around the corner! So long dorks! The guy speeds up and leave both of them in the intoxicating of car fumes Mr. Krabs: We use to beat people up for saying things like that! Everything's all topsy turvy now and not in a foolish sort of way. Triton: Don't worry Krabs man, I got you covered. Triton floors it and catches up with punk dude from earlier. Triton: You didn't let me finish earlier. We're not lost, we have my compass! Triton pulls out what looks like a compass and it shoots a white lasor at the passenger's watering eyeballs. The blinding beam causes the guy and his galfriend to scream "MY EYES" and crash their car into a bridge. Mr. Krabs: I LOVE IT! Triton: So long dorks! Krabs and Triton go to various stops including Mrs. Puff's home and etc. But all of them say the same thing that they haven't seen SpongeBob/Patrick/Squidward in a while. They reach their last stop at Sandy's treedome. They go up to the door to find only a note. "Went asleep for the winter". Mr. Krabs: I don't get it, the water's fine. They look again at the treedome and it is full with snow now, 'cause forget logic. They decide to get back in the car Triton: Oh flippin' great, they're having a Christmas while we're out here clueless. Is that really the last person man? Mr. Krabs: Yes. except one. Triton: Did you say something? Mr. Krabs: Oh nothin'... Triton: Nothin' dude? Mr. Krabs looks around before crossing his arms. Mr. Krabs: eeeeyep Triton: No you said something dude. Spit it out for the love of my dad. Mr. Krabs: Fine. There is one last person., but I doubt they can help us in anyway possible. Triton: Well it's better than nothing at this point. Mr. Krabs: I doubt that. Triton: So who would they would be? The scene cuts a half an hour later where they are walking up to a familiar place's front doors. Mr. Krabs hesitates before knocking. His eyes showing a strange combination of pity, and indigestion. Mr. Krabs: I've got a bad feeling in the pit of me wallet. As he knocks, a tiny figure opens the door. Plankton: Our speciality today is Chum- He looks at Krabs and Triton. Krabs is trying to avoid correct eye contact with his nemesis. Plankton: balaya... Krabs? What the barnacles do you want? Krabs is still looking away before Triton elbows him gesturing for him to speak. Krabs: Nothin'. Triton: We need your help dude. Plankton: Wait, is that? I thought it was but now I'm sure. Prince Triton of King Neptune? Triton: Yeppers, now listen man. Plankton: Isn't it bad enough Krabs that you tried taunt me with King Neptune coming to your restaurant and now this? That's low, even for a cheapshake like yourself. Krabs: I ain't trying to taunt ye at all you little green snot. We *gulps* need yer help. Plankton: Help? Oh I'll help you alright... Plankton slams the door on them and cackles loudly. Both of them are standing outside before Krabs remarks something. Krabs: Oh well, he probably wouldn't know the location of me employees anyways. Plankton still laughing behind the door hears this and instantly stops laughing. He opens the door again. Plankton: ...They're missing? Triton: Eyup. Plankton: Meaning the Krusty Krab is closed until you find them? Krabs: Pretty much. Plankton: Hold on a sec. Plankton pulls out a record player behind his back (I guess that makes sense in his world). He puts it the needle on the record. As he starts rejoicing it plays "Mr. Lonely" and in embarrassment he flips the record on the other side. The song is "Celebrate Good Times". Plankton: Oh glorious day COME TO ME PAPA! UH HUH WA WA HUH WA WA! Triton: This is frickin' pointless, I'm leaving. Krabs: Tis pointless indeed... And to think I was going to give ye a Krabby Patty if you helped us find them... Plankton stops his little jig and stares at Krabs. Plankton: UH HUH WHAT WHAT? Krabs slyly looks at his shiny claws before turning his attention back on him. Krabs: Yeah... figured whoever knew where they were or maybe even helped us find them. I would give 'em a free patty as a reward. Plankton: You're joking. Krabs: Nope, totally honest. Plankton: Nope trying to dupe me Krabs. I'm not falling for it! Krabs: Guess you really don't want it. Plankton: You're lying! Krabs: A crabs' honor that I'm telling the truth. Plankton: Well.. I- Triton: For us gods' sakes! JUST AGREE WITH IT MAN! Plankton: Okay, but if you're lying I'll attack your restaurant so hard you'll be out of business for months! Krabs: I understand Sheldon. Now then will ye help us? Plankton: Mehbeh. ------------------ It was the next morning in Patrick Star's home. He had fallen asleep next to his box and crumpled up letter the night before. Patrick stretched and got up to check on a pot of stew he had made for breakfast. He poured the hot substance in a pink shell from a snail before sighing in bliss to himself and put his box on top of the sand table. He opened it to reveal a new friend of his he had "made" last night before falling asleep. Patrick: What we have is special. Dohehehehe. In so another night went and morning went by before anyone noticed that Gary the Snail had gone missing. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Jenkins Posted November 5, 2013 Author Share Posted November 5, 2013 I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAAAAAAAAAL? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sauce Mama Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Gary come hooooome! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clappy Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Hmmm I could have sworn I liked every single episode so far. Better fix that now. Great work. For every episode. Both of you. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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