Cyberpunk: An underwater dystopia

[JCM]

The year is 4014. Humans have been long extinct, but their legacy remains not only on our lands but in our waters. Centuries of chemical pollution have created thousands of mutated races of fish. Landfill run-off has covered the seas and plunged their inhabitants into an eternal darkness. SpongeByran is one of these inhabitants, and he roughs it daily in the slums of Alveus, the futuristic version of Bikini Bottom. His best friends, Pat and Ron, are two heads of the same starfish and one of Alveus' many mutants. Like everyone else in their neighborhood, they're dirt poor, but they've learned to survive by stealing from the wealthier parts of the city. SpongeBryan often dreams of a better life, but he's figured by now that those dreams are nothing more than what they are: dreams.

As you can probably tell, it's not the jolliest show you'll see. I'll put up the first episode sometime in August, but until then, I'd love to know what you think of it so far.

[TJ]

I love this idea .

[box]

This sounds intriguing.

[Old Man Jenkins]

Wow, this seems like it could be some pretty deep stuff and I love black comedy. Seriously cannot wait to read this.

[Elastic Dawg]

Anything cyberpunk is cool by me. There better be Tetsuo and Blade Runner references aplenty.

[box]

Black comedy rules no matter what.

Also why does this remind me a bit of The Oblongs?

[Wumbo]

This sounds great. You've proven you can write comedy with JCMovies, can't wait to see what this will be like!

[JCM]

Remember when I said the first episode would be out in August?

Well, I lied.

----

Once upon a time, there was a chain of Pacific islands known as Bikini Atoll. It had a beautiful landscape and a perfectly harmonic ecosystem, and it spent most of its life completely untouched by humans.

The first human settlers venerated Bikini Atoll as a symbol of peace and freedom. Later on in its life, however, another group of humans discovered and conquered it. These humans, it turned out, were less interested in worshipping Bikini Atoll and more interested in using it to test out their most powerful weapons.

The testing occurred on and off for the next three centuries with weapons that got progressively more lethal. Bikini Atoll, someway, somehow, managed to endure it all. But, alas, it could not endure the detonation of the final human weapon. And, in the end, humanity couldn't endure it, either.

“SpongeBryan?”

Located directly under Bikini Atoll was the maritime metropolis of Bikini Bottom. Bikini Bottom was well-built, well-governed, and economically stable, and had a large, diverse population containing everything from sea sponges to land squirrels. It hit its stride by the time the first bomb hit Atoll, and its ultimate fall coincided with Atoll's destruction.

“SpongeBryan?”

From the ashes of Bikini Bottom, a new city was born. This was the city of Alveus.

“SpongeBryan! Wake up!”

Pat shook SpongeBryan awake, and SpongeBryan sheilded his eyes from Pat's headlamp.

“What?” muttered SpongeBryan.

“Don't you remember?” whispered Pat. “We were going to go shopping tonight.”

Pat turned his head, revealing the grinning face of his brother, Ron. Pat and Ron, conjoined by the neck since birth, was an abnormality, a mutant, or as the creative people liked to say, a freak.

“Oh yeah,” said SpongeBryan, putting his headlamp on. “I almost forgot about that. Where are we shopping this time?”

“Well, I heard that Old Man Rogers was heading out to the zapping range this evening,” said Pat.

“Then let's not waste any more time.” SpongeBryan snapped on his rocket boots, grabbed his miniature laptop, and sprinted out the door of his apartment with his friends right behind him.

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron lifted off with their rocket boots and soared through the sky. They used their headlamps as a type of radar, monitoring activity from below, and once they reached their destination, an elite neighborhood known as the Upper Ring of Alveus, they quietly landed and walked along the side of the road.

Pat and Ron led SpongeBryan to a mansion decorated with glowing lights. The brothers felt a small rumble in their stomach and realized that they hadn't eaten for an entire day.

“Do you think he left any snacks in there?” moaned Ron.

“Only one way to find out,” said SpongeBryan while tapping at his laptop. “Alright, the security system's disabled. Let's break in.”

Pat and Ron took out their laser guns and burned a hole around the door. SponeBryan kicked down the weakened door and walked cautiously into the mansion.

“It's safe!” called SpongeBryan as he signaled the others to come in.

Pat and Ron immediately headed towards the kitchen while SpongeBryan scanned the living room of valuables. As SpongeBryan stuffed his bag with jewelry and microchips, Pat and Ron stuffed their faces with candy and seaweed-chips. Once Pat and Ron were full, they accompanied SpongeBryan upstairs to “shop” with him on the second floor.

15 minutes later, Old Man Rogers drove up to the mansion. Noticing the door gone, he ran into the house with his laser gun ready.

“Who's in there?” he screamed. Nobody answered.

“Who's in there?” he screamed again. Still no answer.

Old Man Rogers scrambled up the stairs and into his room. He noticed that the bottom of his window was scorced and looked out of it in vain. Upon realizing that he had just been robbed clean, he threw his laser gun to the ground in fury.

“I'll get you bastards!” he cried to the heavens. “I'll track you down until my dying breath!”

He died the next morning. He was a very old man.

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron sold off most of what they acquired, and SpongeBryan used his half of the profits to pay off gambling debts. Pat and Ron used their half to buy out the local grocery store, and the two-headed freak from the slums of Alveus would never have to worry about being hungry again.

[JCM]

Here the completed version of the latest ep.

----

No Animals Were Harmed in the Making of this Episode

Alveus, like every community, was divided into clear, distinct social classes. The upper class held all the wealth and lived in a small but comfortable neighborhood known, quite appropriately, as the Upper Ring. The lower class, which composed about 99.9% of Alveus’ population, had incomes that ranged from nothing to barely-making-the-rent. Alveus once had a thriving middle class, but it was all but obliterated after the mega-corporation FutureWorks began producing robots tailor-made for every occupation.

SpongeBryan, Pat and Ron were members of the lower class, but they did substantially better than most of their comrades thanks to their lucrative “night jobs”. One of their regular targets during these night jobs was an eight-tentacled cephalopod who went by the name of Octhomas.

“Where are those little sinkholes at?” muttered Octhomas as he peered through his telescope.

The night remained clear. It was always clear before they attacked. Octhomas’ eyes drooped lower and lower, and before he could do anything, he was fast asleep.

The sound of one of his androids making breakfast woke Octhomas up. He took one more look through the telescope before turning around to find his couch missing.

“Damn it!” screamed Octhomas as kicked his telescope out the window.

“Your toast and milk is ready, master,” said the android. “Master, what is wrong?”

“Everything, Model 9612. Everything is wrong.”

Octhomas walked into the kitchen, gulped down the toast, and washed it down with a cold glass of milk. He noticed a laser gun at the foot of his table and squeezed his empty glass until it shattered to pieces.

“What do I do?” said Octhomas as he wiped off his bloody hands with a napkin. “How do I keep the freak and geek away from my house?”

“May I recommend a guard worm?” said Model 9612.

“A guard worm? Yes! Get me the address of the closest animal retailer.”

Model 9612 printed out the address from a slot in its chest. Octhomas grabbed the address, left his mansion, and flew his private jet-boat to Jimmy’s Pet Store.

The pet store was filled with the sounds of chirping scallops and purring snails. Jimmy strolled up from behind the counter to greet his newest customer.

“Hi, there! What can I do for you?” said Jimmy.

“I was just wondering if you had a guard worm you could sell to me,” said Octhomas.

“A guard worm? No, we’re all out of those. But I have something even better for you!”

Jimmy ran back to the counter and pulled out from under it a pair of robotic worms with sharp metal teeth and glowing red eyes.

“These guys are guaranteed to keep your house safe,” said Jimmy. “And since I’m feeling nice today, I’ll give you both of them for the price of one!”

“I don’t know,” said Octhomas.

“I’ll throw in a free t-shirt!”

“You have yourself a deal!”

So Octhomas walked out of the pet store with two new deadly companions, and he flew back home, eager to try them out.

SpongeBryan, meanwhile, was planning a return to Octhomas’ house to retrieve the laser gun he left there. Pat and Ron offerred to lend him one of their guns for the trip, but SpongeBryan declined, saying that he’d just be in and out. That was it.

When SpongeBryan arrived at the mansion that night, he found that its security system was already disabled. He used a rock to cut a glass circle out of the living room window and quietly made his way in. He spotted his laser gun at the bottom of the stairs, and as he picked it up, he felt a sudden pain in one of his legs.

“Ow! What the crap?”

SpongeBryan turned around and pulled a robotic worm off his leg. Another one appeared from behind and took a large bite out of his arm. SpongeBryan picked up his laser gun and shot a hole through the second worm’s head.

The first worm, upon seeing this, hesitated for a few moments. SpongeBryan was quick to point the gun at its head, and he continued to do so without noticing the other worm squirming towards his ankle.

The next bite caused SpongeBryan to drop his gun in surprise, allowing the first worm to pounce on his head while the second one chewed at his calf. SpongeBryan attempted to reach for the gun again, but the worm at his leg pulled him away and threw him to the other side of the living room. The impact of the fall made SpongeBryan too weak to move, and he watched in terror as the two worms headed for him.

“Wait! Stop! What are you two doing?” Octhomas said as he sped down the stairs. “I told you to take a bite out of his pants or something! You know, scare him! Don’t kill the little guy!”

“These are your goons?” said SpongeBryan as he stood up.

“Don’t look at me like I’m some sort of monster! You were robbing my house!”

“Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. But a sponge has gotta pay his bills.”

The robotic worms, uninterested in the chit-chat, continued for SpongeBryan with their ravenous jaws baring.

“I said stop!” pleaded Octhomas. “Don’t make me dismantle you!”

The first worm ripped a piece of flesh from SpongeBryan’s thigh, and in desparation, Octhomas picked up the laser gun, searched for the trigger, and fired.

The laser hit the first worm in its upper back, the very location of its on/off switch. Octhomas shot the second worm in the exact same location, and within a few seconds, they were both completely shut down.

“Thanks,” said SpongeBryan.

“You’re welcome,” said Octhomas. “But I still don’t like you stealing from me.”

“Alright, then. I’ll never steal from you again. So how about it? Friends?”

“Don’t push your luck. I’d never befriend a peasant. Now get out of my house.”

SpongeBryan limped out of the mansion. As Octhomas slammed the door behind him, he noticed something missing from the nearby coat hanger: the free t-shirt from his purchase of the robotic worms.

“Yep, I’ll never steal from him again,” said SpongeBryan as he flew home wearing the missing t-shirt. “Starting…now.”

[JCM]

I skipped last week because of laziness.

----

Debtors Never Prosper

There were no mornings in Alveus. There were no rise and shines, no cock-a-doodle-doos, nothing of that sort. Mornings had no place in a city with skies that were pitch black 24 hours a day.

The early hours became known as the “waking cycle” instead. During one of these waking cycles, a stronge breeze from outside woke the brothers Pat and Ron from their deep sleeps.

“Ron,” mumbled Pat. “Did you forget to close the window again?”

“No,” said Ron, trying to keep his eyes shut. “You saw me close the window last night, remember?”

“Then how did it get open?”

Pat grabbed a flashlight from under the bed, and when he turned it on, his face contorted in shock.

“Ron, I think you’ll want to see this.”

“Can it wait till later?”

“No, it can’t.”

Ron opened his eyes, and the first thing he noticed was Pat’s trembling red palm. The second thing he noticed was the severed head of a seahorse at the foot of his bed.

Pat and Ron were out of breath by the time they made it to SpongeBryan’s apartment.

“What’s going on?” yawned SpongeBryan as he let them in. “You two look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Something like that,” said Pat.

“We need your help,” said Ron. “We owe these mob guys a whole lot of money, and they’ve just made it clear that they know where we live.”

“Wait, you took a loan from the Pacific Mafia?” stuttered SpongeBryan. “Why?”

“Nobody else would invest in our goofishing business,” said Pat.

“For good reason, too. It went bankrupt in less than a year,” added Ron.

“Anyway, after we realized we couldn’t pay back the loan, we changed our names and moved to a new city, and it was working out great until now,” said Pat.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” said SpongeBryan.

“You never asked,” said Ron.

“Alright,” said SpongeBryan. “How do you want me to help?”

“Well, we’ll never get the money we need from night jobs alone. I think…we’re going to have to rob a bank,” said Pat.

SpongeBryan laughed.

“A bank? Are you crazy? A couple of chums like us would never make it past a security guard!” he said.

“Well, then what are we going to do?” asked Ron.

“What else can we do? We have to go right to the source, the gangsters’ abode. There, hopefully, we’ll be able to work out some kind of deal,” said SpongeBryan.

Pat, and Ron shrugged and followed SpongeBryan out the apartment, They ignited their rocket boots and took off for Pacific City, the capital of the ocean.

Pacific City was located in a trench, and before the days of rocket boots and jet-boats, one could only get to it by driving down a vertical road. Originally, the town’s bizarre species and customs made it an unpopular with other, more “civilized” societies. Though it didn’t have an official name at the time, its political corruption and extremely poor standard of living led to its inhabitants calling it Rock Bottom.

Rock Bottom went from having the worst economy in the ocean to having one of the best within a matter of decades thanks to its establishment of casinos and resorts for tourists. More than anything, however, the city’s unprecedented wealth stemmed from its thriving black market. By 4000, the newly-renamed Pacific City was the most popular tourist destination on the planet.

By the time SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron arrived to the city, most of its casinos were just beginning to open. The casino they were looking for was the Fishes’ Playhouse, which was founded by, owned by, and run by the Pacific Mafia.

In the damp basement of the Fishes’ Playhouse, a group of hammerhead sharks was playing pool.

“Hey, do you know why the boss is out there in the front lobby?” said one shark.

“He said he was expecting visitors,” said another.

At that very moment, SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron walked into the front lobby of the casino, where they were greeted by a great white shark.

“Welcome to the Playhouse!” said the great white. “My name’s Big Tony, and I’m here to make sure you have the ultimate in fun!”

Big Tony pulled out a deck of cards.

“How about a game of Go Fish to get you in the mood?” he said.

“No thanks,” said SpongeBryan. “My friends, Pat and Ron, just want to talk about a debt they owe you.”

Pat and Ron waved uncomfortably.

“Ah, you two!” laughed Big Tony “Well, spit it out. What do you want to say?”

“Do you think you can extend the deadline for paying back the money?” squeaked Pat.

“Well,” said Big Tony. “You’ve already had seven years, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. But we’ll just need a teenie tiny bit more time,” said Ron.

“A teeny tiny bit?” said Big Tony.

“Yes,” said Ron.

“Alright, then. You have a week.”

“We were thinking more like another year,” said Pat.

“Ha ha! That’s funny!” said Big Tony.

“I’m serious, though,” said Pat.

“Oh…listen, I’d love to give you a bunch of leeway on debt, but if I did it for you, I’d have to do it for everyone. That’s bad business, you know? I can’t do that.”

Pat and Ron lowered their heads in defeat. Then, after a few seconds, Big Tony smiled.

“Actually,” he said. “I think we can make a bargain, if you’re up to it..”

“Anything! Anything!” chanted Pat and Ron.

“I want to play your yellow friend in Go Fish,” said Big Tony. “If he beats me, I’ll extend the deadline. Hell, I’ll even cut the debt in half!”

“Wait, you want to play SpongeBryan? Why? He doesn’t have anything to do with this,” said Ron.

SpongeBryan was silent. He had just recovered from a gambling addiction, which was fueled at this very casino. He never told Pat and Ron about it. He was too ashamed.

“I’ll do it,” said SpongeBryan.

“Then come along,” said Big Tony as he led SpongeBryan to his office.

Perhaps that was one of the reasons I decided to come here with Pat and Ron, thought SpongeBryan. Yeah, I wanted to provide support and everything, but maybe I also wanted to play this one last game.

SpongeBryan played that one last game. He played it harder than he had ever played a card game before. When he finally walked out of Big Tony’s office, Pat and Ron were right there waiting for him.

“So?” said Pat.

“You need to get him his money by next week,” growled SpongeBryan. “And I’ll have to get him a couple thousand dollars on top of that.”

“Wait, you made additional deals?” said Ron.

“I have a problem, okay?” shot SpongeBryan. “I’ve always had a problem. And now it’s gotten us all in the hole.”

“Well, what’ll he do if we don’t get him his money on time?” whispered Pat.

“For every day that we’re late on our payments, somebody close to us will die.”

[JCM]

Well, here it is.

----

The Shawshark Redemption

SpongeBryan walked into his apartment with a worried look on his face. In three days, he’d be expected to pay thousands of dollars he didn’t have to the loan shark Big Tony. If he didn’t get the money in time, Tony would start killing off his loved ones. He walked into his kitchen to find Ron gulping down a bottle of liquor.

“Ron, stop messing up our body with that crap!” said Pat.

“Oh, come on!” slurred Ron. “We haven’t had an organ fail in almost a month now!”

“Will you two stop bickering?” said SpongeBryan. “We need to figure out a way to raise some big cash, fast.”

“We’ve said it once, and we’ll say it again,” said Ron. “If we rob ourselves a bank, we’ll have more than enough money to pay off ol’ Jaws!”

“I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again,” said SpongeBryan. “Going for the bank would be suicide.”

“But isn’t it worth a try?” asked Pat. “It’s not like we have any other options right now.”

SpongeBryan sighed. “Fine, but when we end up in jail, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“Yes!” gurgled Ron. “This is why I love you, bro. You always know how to say the thight rings.”

“Oh Neptune, I’m feeling queasy,” said Pat. “Could you excuse us for a moment?”

Pat and Ron ran into the bathroom, and sounds of vomiting soon followed.

That night, SpongeBryan met Pat and Ron at the entrance of Alveus’ Third National Bank. The people that ran the bank were some of the richest in the city, and they often made it clear to the commonfolk that stealing from the bank would be impossible.

SpongeBryan kept this in mind as he walked into the bank with his friends. A morbidly obese security guard came up to them in a flying mobility scooter.

“What do you boys think you’re doing?” said the security guard.

“None of your business, that’s what we’re doing!” said a still-drunk Ron.

“Excuse my friend,” said SpongeBryan. “We just wanted to open an account.”

“You? Open an account?” the security guard laughed. “I can tell a slumboy from a respectable citizen any time of the day. Do yourself a favor and turn back now.”

SpongeBryan clenched his fists in anger. How dare that arrogant fatass talk to him like he was some kind of peasant!

“Now, we’re not trying to start trouble,” said SpongeBryan.

“Yes, you are,” said the security guard. “I know your kind.”

His kind! That was the last straw for SpongeBryan. He pushed the security guard off his scooter and walked to the bank’s safe with Pat and Ron.

“I’ll get you for this!” said the security guard as he rolled on the floor. “Just you wait!”

Once they reached the safe, SpongeBryan opened up his laptop, and a prompt appeared on his screen requesting a password.

“What do you think the password for this safe is?” asked SpongeBryan.

“How about ‘let me in’?” said Ron.

“Seriously?” said SpongeBryan. “You think the password for the most secure lock system in Alveus is ‘let me in’?”

“Yes,” said Ron.

SpongeBryan rolled his eyes and typed “let me in”. After pressing Enter, the door to the safe swung open.

“Un-freakin’-believable,” said SpongeBryan.

“We need to get you drunk more often, Ron,” said Pat.

“Thank you, thank you,” said Ron, bowing his head left and right.

“Alright, let’s grab as much money as we can. We are feasting tonight!”

SpongeBryan, Pat and Ron filled their respective sacks with Alvean currency, and they dragged it with them out the bank’s doors.

“There went my raise,” said the immobilized security guard.

When he got home, SpongeBryan slept better than he had slept in days. He woke up to the ringing of his wrist-phone which, once activated, projected the face of none other than Big Tony.

“Hello, SpongeBryan,” said the holographic mob boss. “I heard about the recent bank robbery. Good job.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said SpongeBryan. “But I do have the money, so you can come over and take it whenever you want.”

“You have the cash already?” beamed Tony. “How wonderful! We must meet up at your closest restaurant, say 2 PM?”

“Our closest restaurant? Do you even know where that is?” asked SpongeBryan.

“Ha ha! Don’t patronize me!” said Tony before cutting off the signal.

SpongeBryan strapped on his rocket boots and flew to Pat and Ron’s apartment, catching them up on the recent news. At 2:00 PM, they walked into a restaurant just outside the Upper Ring, where they found Big Tony and his hammerhead crew waiting for them at a nearby table.

“Bryan and friends! I thought you wouldn’t show!” said Big Tony. “Come! Sit, sit!”

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron sat down at Big Tony’s table, and the great white patted them both on the shoulders.

“Have you ever seen more upstanding gentlemen?” said Tony.

A waiter walked up to them.

“Can I take your order?” he said.

“It’s about time!” said Tony. “Whose family do you have to threaten to get some service around here?”

The waiter pulled the collar of his shirt.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “It won’t happen again. Orders?”

“I’ll have your Bucket of Chum, and my guests will have the Chum Platter,” said Tony.

The waiter bowed then hurried into the kitchen.

“So, tell me all about your little bank heist, whispered Tony. “How did a couple of jerks like you manage to pull it off?”

“Like I said before, I have no idea what you’re talking about,” said SpongeBryan.

The waiter came back and placed a large bucket of chum in front of Big Tony He then put a plate of chum and two bottles of wine in front of SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron. Big Tony poured his bucket of chum into his mouth with delight. SpongeBryan sniffed his plate of chum and gagged, as did Pat and Ron.

“You guys don’t want your chum?” said Big Tony after finishing his bucket.

“No, we’re good,” said SpongeBryan.

“Suit yourself,” said Big Tony as he threw the plate of chum into his mouth.

“Are you going to drink your bottle of wine?” Ron asked SpongeBryan.

“What did you do with your wine?” said SpongeBryan.

Ron burped.

“Alright, fine,” said SpongeBryan before handing Ron his bottle.

Ron drank the entire bottle of wine within seconds. Suddenly, Big Tony pressed a button on his wrist-phone, and policemen stormed the building.

“Put your hands up!” said a policeman as he pointed a laser gun at SpongeBryan.

SpongeBryan raised his arms, and the policeman handcuffed him. Pat and Ron were also handcuffed, and the three of them were driven away from the restaurant in cop cars.

SpongeBryan ended up in an interrogation room with a slim, gruffy-voiced detective.

“I’m telling you,” SpongeBryan told the detective. “I don’t know anything about the bank robbery.”

“That’s not what your friends tell me,” said the detective. “They say you orchestrated the entire thing.”

“You’re lying!” screamed SpongeBryan. “My friends would never say that! Who gave you that anonymous tip in the first place?”

“It’s called an ‘anonymous tip’ for a reason,” said the detective. “And you’re wearing my patience thin. Just confess to the robbery and we can start working out a plea deal.”

“I have nothing to confess,” said SpongeBryan. “And I can assure you that my friends won’t, either.”

“I confess everything!” Ron said as the detective walked into his interrogation room.

“Damn it, Ron!” said Pat.

“We stole from the banks, we stole from almost every house in the Upper Ring, and we stole from your donut box,” gargled Ron.

“I wondered what happened to that donut,” said the detective. “Alright, you’re free to go on the condition that you testify against your porous pal.”

“Out of the question!” snapped Pat.

“You got yourself a deal!” said Ron. “Say, do you know where the nearest bathroom is?”

SpongeBryan sat in his lonely jail cell, staring at the rods of pure electricity that separated him from the rest of the world.

“You have a visitor,” said the guard, the same guard that confronted SpongeBryan at the bank that night before.

The visitor was Big Tony, who walked in with a smile on his face.

“I just wanted to let you know that I stopped by your house and picked up those wonderful sacks of cash. Congratulations! You’re debt-free,” said Big Tony.

“You were the anonymous tip,” said SpongeBryan. “You saw the bank heist as an opportunity to get on good terms with the Alvean Police Force, so you set us up to get caught. You screwed us over.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” said Big Tony. “Enjoy the…rest of your life in here. Oh, and a word of advice: Don’t drop the soap.”

[JCM]

This is probably the best episode I've written so far.

----

Bustin' Out

Frank rushed into the door or his apartment to find his wife, Darla, holding a bundled newborn with her midwife by her side.

“He’s…here?” said Frank. “The baby’s finally here?”

“Yes,” said the midwife. “And I have good news and bad news.”

“What’s the good news?” asked Frank.

“You have twins,” said the midwife.

“Twins?” said Frank. “Then where’s the other one?”

“That’s where the bad news comes in,” said the midwife as she uncovered the blanket.that hid the infant starfish’s two heads.

“What…what is that?” squeaked Frank.

“He’s our child!” said Darla. “They’re our children.”

“No,” said Frank. “That’s no child of mine!”

Frank ran out the apartment, holding back tears. Darla called after him, but it was no use. Frank left the apartment, left the family, and he would never see either of them again.

20 years later, Ron woke up with a throbbing headache. He looked around and noticed that he was sitting in the lobby of a police station.

“What’s going on?” muttered Ron.

“What’s going on?” repeated a furious Pat, much to Ron’s shock. “I’ll tell you what’s going on! You just threw SpongeBryan under the bus!”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“Are you telling me that you don’t remember anything? Were you really that drunk?”

Pat told Ron about the arrests and the interrogation, and as he listened, Ron’s face grew more and more dismal.

“I really did all that?” said Ron.

“Yes,” said Pat. “You and that damn liquor.”

Ron cried. “I’m sorry…I’ve tried to stop…but I can’t. I just can’t. Whenever I get these terrible dreams…”

“Wait,” said Pat. “Dreams? About what?”

“Our dad,” said Ron. “I have dreams about our dad and how he abandoned us.”

Pat sighed. “Oh.”

“But that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is making sure that our friend doesn’t spend another minute in that jail cell.”

Ron threw his empty bottle of wine into the nearest trash can and went with his brother to the office of the detective in charge of the investigation.

“I want to retract everything I said to you during my questioning,” Ron said to the detective. “I was under the influence of alcohol when I made those statements.”

“Oh, really?” said the detective. “Well, it’s too late.”

“Too late? What you mean?” said Pat.

“As we continue to build a case against the sponge, we’re getting eyewitness testimonies from every corner of the Upper Ring that incriminates not only him but both of you,” said the detective. “You can very well retract your statements, but you’d be forfeiting our deal in the process and setting yourselves up for a lifetime in the Alvean petitionary.”

Ron said nothing. Pat said nothing. The detective smiled.

“I think it’s safe to say that this little meeting is over,” he said. “You can feel free to leave the station if you want. We have no further use for you.”

Pat and Ron left the police station with a sick feeling in their stomach.

“What do we do now?” said Pat.

“We’re getting SpongeBryan out of there,” said Ron. “With or without the copper’s help.”

Pat and Ron ignited their rocket boots and flew to their apartment, where they grabbed a laser gun and mirror then said a short prayer to Neptune before heading back towards the police station.

SpongeBryan sat in his jail cell, his eyes interlocked with those of his guard.

“Don’t I get a phone call?” asked SpongeBryan.

“You’re not getting a phone call,” said the guard. “You’re not getting jack. You’re lucky I haven’t finished you off right now. You have no friends, no family, nobody to care. The detective might be a little pissed, since he’s working to get you convicted, but he’s not gonna care, either. Not really.”

The guard, a 500-600 pound lobster, hated SpongeBryan after he robbed Third National Bank, which the guard was responsible for protecting. The robbery led to the guard being fired from his post at the bank and given a lower-paying job as guard at the police station.

“You’re wrong,” said SpongeBryan. “I do have friends.”

“What? The freak?” laughed the guard. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am serious,” said SpongeBryan. “They’re the best friends I ever had. And they’re probably having an even harder time in their cell.”

“They’re not in a cell,” said the guard. “They were given amnesty in exchange for turning you in. They left the station a few minutes ago, in fact.”

“No! You’re lying!”

“When will you accept it? Accept that your friends betrayed you.”

“No!”

SpongeBryan stood up and punched one of his static bars, electrocuting himself.

The guard gasped. “Did he just…?”

The guard disabled the bars and ran to SpongeBryan, feeling his pulse. Suddenly, SpongeBryan punched the guard and ran out of the now-open cell. The guard pulled out a laser gun and chased SpongeBryan into the lobby. He looked around for signs of the escapee, but SpongeBryan jumped onto him from behind. During the struggle, SpongeBryan squeezed a pressure point on the guard’s neck, knocking him out immediately.

“Alright, now to look for my friends,” said SpongeBryan.

“That won’t be necessary,” said the detective as he walked out of his office with a laser gun pointed at SpongeBryan’s head.

SpongeBryan raised his arms and backed away slowly. He looked down and noticed the guard’s laser gun at his foot.

“Don’t even think about picking up that laser gun,” said the detective. “Make one single move, and I’ll shoot you dead. I will not hesitate.”

SpongeBryan cursed and looked back up

“You should’ve stayed in your cell,” said the detective. “I’ve seen kids like you all the time. Determined, always to a fault. But don’t worry. A few more days with us and you won’t have any determination left to spare.”

As the detective walked towards the helpless SpongeBryan, Pat and Ron flew into the police station with their rocket boots.

“You two again?” hissed the detective.

Pat and Ron blasted at the detective with their laser gun. He dodged the blasts and returned fire. SpongeBryan used the opportunity to pick up the guard’s laser gun and join Pat and Ron in their attack. The detective, overcome by laser shots, dropped his gun and ducked into his office.

“How did you manage to escape?” Pat asked SpongeBryan.

“How did I manage to escape?” repeated SpongeBryan. “How did you manage to escape?”

“He doesn’t know,” whispered Ron.

“Let’s keep it that way,” whispered Pat. “He’s gone through enough today.”

Suddenly, the detective jumped out of his office with an automatic laser gun and started firing at the three with a rapid pace. Ron took out his mirror and deflected all the lasers while grabbing SpongeBryan and flying out the police station with his and Pat’s rocket boots. Once they were a safe distance away, they landed with their hearts pounding.

“Looks like we’re fugitives now,” said SpongeBryan.

“Yeah,” said Pat. “Where do we go now?”

“I don’t know where you guys are going,” said Ron. “But I’m going to rehab.”

[Old Man Jenkins]

Finally caught my self up on this and I must say, this spinoff is kickass, mang. Great action and development. Can't wait to read more!

[JCM]

Aaand we're back!

----

A Fresh Start

It was a week since SpongeBryan escaped from prison. The detective and the guard responsible for watching over him were fired by Alveus’ mayor and exiled from the city until they brought him back along with his partners in crime, Pat and Ron.

The detective waited by a coral tree in the middle of a vast trench, anticipating a very special visitor. Suddenly, his wrist-phone began to ring. He pressed a button, and the face of the guard who was exiled with him appeared in a hologram.

“What are you doing?” hissed the detective. “I told you not to call me during the meeting! What if he thinks I’m working with the police?”

“But you are working with the police,” said the guard.

“You know what I mean.”

“Are you sure that this bounty hunter will be able to find who we’re looking for?”

“I’ve talked to a lot of people about this guy. If anyone can find them, he can. Oh, no! I can see him in the distance! Goodbye.”

The detective turned off his wrist-phone and stood innocently by the coral tree as the bounty hunter approached.

“You got my money?” said the bounty hunter.

The detective took out a stack of sand dollars and placed them in the bounty hunter’s hand.

“Here’s half the bounty,” said the detective. “You’ll get the other half when you bring me these little punks.”

The detective took mugshots of SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron out of his shirt pocket. The bounty hunter grabbed the mugshots and grunted as he stuck them in his pocket.

“Nice doing business with you,” said the detective.

The bounty hunter grunted again and walked off. Once he was out of sight, the detective turned on his wrist-phone and called the guard.

“It was a success!” cheered the detective.

“That’s great,” said the guard. “Now what do we do?”

“We do what we’re been doing up until now. We wait. I’ll be over there in a few minutes.”

The guard sat down in the mud cabin he and the detective built for themselves. He nibbled on a piece of algae and shuddered at its bitter taste.

“I knew I should’ve been an engineer,” said the guard.

Five minutes later, the detective walked into the cabin and hung up his trench coat.

“Hey, Jimmy. I hope you didn’t miss me too much.”

Jimmy the guard threw his piece of algae to the ground and stepped on it furiously.

“Damn you, Arthur! Why did you have to choose the most desolate place in the entire ocean for us to pitch camp?”

“We can’t risk being seen,” said Arthur the detective. “If we want to nab those kids, we’ll need to do this as discretely as possible. That’s why we sent a bounty hunter after them. I underestimated them once. I’m not going to do it again.”

“Well, if it’ll help us get out jobs back, I guess I’ll go along with this,” said Jimmy. “But don’t expect me be happy about it.”

“I won’t,” said Arthur.

They brushed off the crumpled algae, cooked it, and ate it for dinner. That night, as Arthur and Jimmy slept soundly in their beds, a small army of mutants snuck into the cabin, led by a tall, muscular, one-eyed fish.

“Where’s the leak, ma’am?” muttered Arthur as he opened his eyes. Upon seeing the mutants, he leaned to the next bed shook Jimmy awake. They both scurried closer to the back of their beds as the mutants surrounded them.

“Please tell me this is just a horrible nightmare,” whispered Jimmy.

“Oh, this is no nightmare,” said the one-eyed leader with a devious smile. “This is as real as it gets.”

“What do you want?” cried Arthur. “If you want money, we have plenty of it. Take as much as you want!”

“We don’t want money,” said the one-eyed leader, disgusted. “What we want…is vengeance!”

The one-eyed leader pulled out a laser gun and shot a beam through Arthur’s chest, killing him immediately. Jimmy jumped out of his bed in terror. Two of the mutants grabbed him and pinned him to the wall.

“Please! Please,” said Jimmy. “Whatever you’re planning to do with me, don’t do it.”

“What would be the fun in that?” said the one-eyed leader. “Besides, we can’t risk you going off and finding SpongeBryan before we do. He’s the symbol of our insurgency.”

“Insurgency?” said Jimmy. “What are you talking about?”

“What does it matter? You’ll be dead in a few seconds, anyway.”

“No! I’m begging you!”

The one-eyed leader pointed the laser gun at Jimmy’s head.

“No!”

He pulled the trigger.

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron could barely walk anymore when they finally reached their destination: the isolated town of Insulam.

“Here it is,” said SpongeBryan. “The location of our new home.”

“Thank Neptune,” wheezed Ron. “I didn’t think I could go on for much longer.”

“Yeah, I know,” said Pat. “It’s a good thing you control our legs.”

“Think about it,” proclaimed SpongeBryan. “We no longer have to worry about the conflicts and troubles of our old life. It’s clean slate, a fresh start.”

“Yeah, yeah,” said Pat. “So when do we get something to eat?”

“I second that,” said Ron. “We haven’t had a bite in almost a week now.”

SpongeBryan chuckled. They purchased a bowl of fried scallops from a nearby food stand, and Pat and Ron indulged in the scallops while SpongeBryan took in the sights around him.

“Its a fresh start,” repeated SpongeBryan.

“You want some?” said Pat as he offered SpongeBryan a handful of fried scallops.

“Uh…no thanks.”

[JCM]

New Lives

Pat and Ron didn’t know what to expect as they walked into the New Life Rehabilitation Center. Would they be welcomed? Would they be turned away? As mutants, Pat and Ron were familiar with rejection. They heard voices in an adjacent room, and they entered, discovering a circle of chairs that seated a variety of alcoholics, many of them mutants like Pat and Ron.

“Sorry,” said Pat. “We can come back later.”

“No, that’s alright,” said an elderly shrimp as he pulled up a chair next to him. “Come. Have a seat.”

Pat and Ron looked at the blue fish with uncertainty, but they sat in the offered chair.

“So,” said the shrimp. “How about an introduction from our newest inductees?”

“Well…” said Pat. “I’m Pat, and that’s Ron.”

Ron waved.

“He’s usually more talkative than this,” said Pat.

“I understand,” said the shrimp. “This is never easy the first time around. I’m Guy Perchins, founder of New Life. I’ll do whatever I can to make you feel comfortable.”

“Thanks,” mumbled Ron.

Guy Perchins stroked his long, thin beard. “So, do you both have a problem?”

“No,” said Pat. “It’s just my brother. I’m only here because I’m attached to him.”

Ron looked down.

“It’s alright,” said Perchins. “You’re among friends. In fact, one of our other group members was just about to relate his own story when you walked in. Jim?”

Jim, unlike most of the patients in the room, wasn’t a mutant. He grew up in a privileged family and was on board to inherit a vast technological empire. He never wanted the fame or fortune that his name commanded, however, and he ran away from home at the age of 16 with a suitcase full of clothes and ten thousand dollars in his pocket.

Jim, like many other runaways, settled in Insulam. It was an arrangement that he was happy with at first, but as days turned to weeks, he began to miss his friends and family back home. The knowledge that he could never return lest he forfeit all his newly acquired freedom put him into a deep depression. Insulam’s “drink-your-problems-away” culture appealed to him, and before he knew it, he was drinking twelve bottles of liquor every day.

“Now that you have a feel for what we do, are you ready to tell us your story?” Perchins asked Ron.

“Umm…” stuttered Ron.

“It’s fine if you aren’t,” said Perchins.

“No, I am,” said Ron. He took a deep breath, and began to tell his story.

----

SpongeBryan strolled through the streets of Insulam, hoping to find a Help Wanted sign somewhere, anywhere. The money he managed to secure from his apartment in Alveus was running out, and running out fast. If he didn’t find a job soon, he’d have to start begging, or worse, stealing just to make ends meet.

“And stay out!”

SpongeBryan heard the call from a few blocks behind him. He saw a teenager running from a liquor store and a man, presumably the owner, shaking a broom at him from inside the store.

“Jackass,” grunted the owner as he slammed the door behind him. A few seconds later, a Help Wanted sign appeared in the store’s window.

SpongeBryan, seeing the opportunity, ran into the liquor store.

“Excuse me,” he said, catching his breath. “I saw the Help Wanted sign in the window.”

“Oh, you did?” said the owner.

“Yes,” said SpongeBryan. “And I wanted to apply for a job.”

“I see.” The owner took out a small tablet. “Just sign this and you’ll have the job.”

“It’s that easy?” SpongeBryan pressed his index finger on the tablet, and it dinged in approval.

“Yes.” The owner smiled. “Say, I don’t recall seeing you around here. What’s your name?”

“SpongeBryan.”

“Well, SpongeBryan, welcome to the crew! I’m Mr. Fins, and you’ll be working the counter along with my daughter, Sally. Speaking of Sally, where in the world is she at?”

As if on cue, a young seal walked in from another room.

”There you are, Sally!” said Mr. Fins. “Meet our newest employee, SpongeBryan!”

“Hi,” said Sally, looking down at her feet.

Sally belonged to one of the few species of mammal on the planet. As the air above water became unbreathable, seals, dolphins, frogs, and other semi-aquatic animals had to adapt to breathing underwater full-time. All other species, unable to make the same transition, gradually went extinct.

“Do me a favor and show him around the shop, dear,” said Mr. Fins. “I’ll be in my office.”

Once they were left alone, SpongeBryan chuckled. “So, he’s your dad, huh?”

“I was adopted,” Sally muttered as she went behind the counter. “So, here’s how the register works…”

----

When Ron finished telling his story, he opened his eyes for the first time in what felt like hours. When he turned to Guy Perchins, he saw nothing but sympathy in his eyes.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” said Perchins.

“Yeah,” said Ron. “So do I.”

“Well, listen,” said Perchins. “The first step to solving a problem is admitting that you have a problem, and you’ve made that admission by coming here. Next, you have to realize that all this stuff that’s happening, it’s not your fault?”

“Not my fault?” cried Ron. “SpongeBryan was arrested because of me! All this crap that happened…all of it was my fault!”

“No,” said Perchins. “That wasn’t you. That was the alcohol.”

Ron laughed with disbelief. “I’m sure that SpongeBryan will believe that a bottle of whiskey turned him into the feds! I don’t even know why I wanted to do this! This is completely pointless!”

“Ron, calm down,” whispered Pat. “He’s only trying to help.”

“Well, it isn’t working,” said Ron.

“Well listen, the group session is almost over,” said Perchins. “So if you want to come back tomorrow, you can.”

“Thanks, but no thanks,” said Ron.

Pat and Ron got up and left with the rest of the patients.

----

As Mr. Fins locked up for the night, SpongeBryan attempted to talk to Sally one last time.

“Well, thanks for showing me around,” said SpongeBryan.

“It’s not like I had a choice,” said Sally.

“Well, it was still nice of you.” SpongeBryan stretched out his hand for Sally to shake, but she simply put her hands in her pockets and headed for Mr. Fin’s car.

“Look at that,” said Mr. Fins as he looked down the road. ’New Life Rehabilitation Center’. Ever since that place opened, I’ve been losing customers left and right. Someone needs to shut that place down.”

Upon hearing the name of the facility, SpongeBryan’s eyes opened wide. Ron! His friend was struggling with alcohol, and here he was, working at a liquor shop. He felt as if he sold out his soul for a couple of bucks an hour. But how many opportunities like this would he find? Especially in a small town like Insulam.

SpongeBryan walked to the apartment that he shared with Pat and Ron. Once he was inside, Pat and Ron greeted him, both with nervous looks on their faces.

“Guys, there’s something I need to tell you,” said SpongeBryan.

“Us first,” said Pat.

“And you’re probably not going to like it,” said Ron.

“It can’t possibly be worse than what I’m about to tell you,” said SpongeBryan.

Pat and Ron looked at each other in confusion.

“Okay, you first,” said Pat.

“I took up a job at the liquor store,” said SpongeBryan. “I know you’re recovering, and I promise I won’t bring anything back. Neptune, I feel so selfish.”

Pat and Ron paused for a moment, then laughed.

“That’s all?” said Ron.

“We don’t have a problem with you working at a liquor store,” said Pat. “In fact, that’s great! We’ll need a new source of income.”

“Oh, okay.” SpongeBryan laughed with them. “I can’t believe I was so worried. Hey, what was it you were going to tell me?”

Ron stuttered, “J-just that I’m making great progress at New Life, that’s all.”

SpongeBryan raised an eyebrow. “That doesn’t seem so bad.”

“Yeah, now that I think of it, it isn’t,” said Ron. “Well, see you tomorrow morning!”

Pat and Ron hurried into their room, and SpongeBryan shrugged and made a sandwich.

----

The bounty hunter stepped over the country line into Insulam. The first thing he spotted was the food stand, and he walked up to the vendor at the stand and showed him mugshots of SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron.

“Have you seen these three before?” growled the bounty hunter.

“Don’t remember them,” said the vendor, barely paying attention.

The bounty hunter formed a ball of pure electricity in his hand, and he threw it it at the food stand, blowing it up. The vendor, moaning on the street, with the debris of his products all around his, gasped as the bounty hunter held the mugshots of the fugitives in front of his charred face.

“Remember them now?” said the bounty hunter.

The vendor nodded in terror.

[So Sejima]

I remember them! I remember them!

[JCM]

Skeletons in the Closet

“I’m going off to work, guys!” said SpongeBryan as he left the apartment.

Pat and Ron lay in their bed, neither having had any sleep the night before.

“You can’t put this off forever,” said Pat.

“I’m not going back to that…place,” said Ron. “Besides, I haven’t had a drink in days, and I’m fine.”

“Ron, I’m going through the same withdrawal symptoms that you’re going through. You are not going to hold out for long. You need help.”

“No, I don’t! I’m tired of people telling me what I need! !-“

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door.

“Who’s that?” said Pat.

Pat and Ron opened the door to find Jim, one of the struggling alcoholics they met at New Life Rehabilitation Center, standing there.

“Hey, guys,” said Jim. “Can I come in?”

“Sure,” said Pat.

Pat and Ron stepped out of the way as Jim walked into their apartment.

“Would you like some coffee?” said Pat.

“No, I won’t be staying long,” said Jim. “I just wanted to see if everything was all right after that little incident with Ron in group therapy.”

“I’m sorry,” said Ron. “I blew my top off, I’ll admit, but I’m just not used to that kind of atmosphere.”

“None of us were when we started,” said Jim. “I threw more tantrums than a toddler during my first days at New Life.”

Jim looked down at his wrist-phone then looked back up with a smile on his face.

“You should come back,” said Jim.

“No,” said Ron. “I just wouldn’t fit in.”

“Wouldn’t fit in?” Jim laughed with disbelief. “We’re all outcasts. Why do you think we started drinking in the first place?”

Ron chuckled. “Alright, let me think for a few minutes.”

“Well, I should be heading up to New Life now,” said Jim. “Hope to see you there!”

As the door closed behind Jim, Pat and Ron perched themselves on the couch.

“Are you sure I should do this?” said Ron.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life,” said Pat.

Ron took a deep breath and went with his brother out the door.

----

It was another slow day at Mr. Fins’ liquor store. SpongeBryan and Sally were in their places behind the counter, chatting about the weather, dark and damp as always. The bell above the door rang, and a teenage boy appeared under it.

“Well, I see you replaced me fast,” said the boy.

“Order something or get out,” said Sally.

“Alright, alright,” said the boy. “Don’t get pushy.”

SpongeBryan recognized the boy as the teen who got fired right before he applied for the job at the liquor store.

“I’ll have a Flying Dutchman,” said the boy. “Actually, make that two. There’s someone special I plan to meet up with in a hour.”

The boy put a 20 dollar bill on the counter, and SpongeBryan put it in the register and gave the boy his change.

“How’d you get fired, anyway?” blurted SpongeBryan.

The boy laughed, as if surprised that SpongeBryan would ask that question. “I took a few dollars from the cash register, and the when the old man found out, he lost his marbles and kicked me to the curb.”

“We don’t take kindly to stealing,” said Sally.

“It was only three or four bucks,” said the boy. “You didnt have to sic your damn father on me. I needed that job.”

“Here’s your Flying Dutchmen,” muttered Sally as she tossed two bottles of a clear green liquid into the boy’s hands.

“Thank you,” said the boy before exiting the premises.

“What a pleasant kid,” snarked SpongeBryan.

“Tell me about it,” added Sally.

----

The teenage boy took a sip from one of his bottles as he walked through an empty street. A large hand tapped him on the shoulder.

“What?” said the boy, turning around.

The bounty hunter revealed himself from the shadows and put mugshots of SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron in front of the boy’s face.

“Have you seen these three?” said the bounty hunter.

“I’ve seen the yellow one,” said the boy.

“Where?” cried the bounty hunter.

“I’ll tell you,” said the boy. “But first, you’ve gotta offer me something in return.”

“Fine.” The bounty hunter picked the boy up by the collar of his shirt. “I’ll give you…your life.”

“Sounds good enough for me,” squeaked the boy. “He works at Mr. Fins’ liquor shop. It’s just around the corner and a couple of blocks down. You can’t miss it.”

“Thanks.” The bounty hunter dropped the boy, who quickly scurried away. “I’m coming for you, SpongeBryan.”

----

SpongeBryan walked into Mr. Fins’ office with a nervous expression. “You wanted me, sir?”

“Yes,” said Mr. Fins. “I’d like you to run an errand.”

Mr. Fins took a sheet of paper out from under his desk and gave it to SpongeBryan.

“I’m doing some renovations to help attract customers, and I want you to pick up these items from the local hardware store. You think you can handle it?”

“Of course.”

“Great! See you soon.”

SpongeBryan tucked the sheet of paper into his shirt pocket and left through the back entrance.

“Sally, you’ll be taking care of the cash register while he’s gone!” announced Mr. Fins from his office.

“I know what to do!” replied Sally.

Sally opened and closed the cash register repeatedly. The endless cycle of opens and closes reminded Sally of the endless cycle that was her own life. Every day, she did this stupid job at her father’s boring liquor shop, and nothing ever changed. Not even her father, who still called her “dearie” and treated her like she was thirteen years old. She wanted to do something else with her life, but she didn’t know what yet. This job was all she had and all she knew, and even though she hated it, she didn’t know if she was ready to give it up.

Suddenly, the bell above the door rang, and the bounty hunter appeared under it.

“Where is he?” said the bounty hunter.

“Who?” said Sally.

The bounty hunter slapped SpongeBryan’s mugshot on the counter.

“Him,” he said.

Sally paused for a moment, then said, “He left about a minute ago. I don’t know when he’ll be back.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Well, you’ll have to.”

The bounty hunter knocked over the counter, sparks of electricity shooting out of his fingernails.

“What the hell is going on?” whispered Mr. Fins in his office.

“If you aren’t going to tell me where you’re hiding him, I’ll just have to shock it out of you,” said the bounty hunter.

Sally got a grip on the floor with her claws then kicked the bounty hunter with both of her legs. The bounty hunter tripped over the fallen counter, and Sally seized the opportunity to run out the back entrance. The bounty hunter quickly got back up and jumped on the fleeing seal. With his hands on her neck, he stood and giggled with delight.

“Oh, I love a good fight!” said the bounty hunter. “Too bad you won’t be alive to brawl me again.”

“Think again!” said a voice from behind him.

A knife penetrated the bounty hunter’s back, but an explosion of static sent the knife and the person holding it to the other side of the room. Sally’s heart dropped when she realized that the person holding the knife was her father, Mr. Fins.

“You crazy, crazy bastard,” said the bounty hunter. “My spine has 100 volts of current running through it.”

Sally broke away from the bounty hunter and raced to Mr Fins’ side.

“I couldn’t save you, dearie,” he said, coughing. “I couldn’t…”

Mr. Fins closed his eyes and let out one last breath. Sally checked his pulse, and the resulting stillness turned her gray.

“Well, that was a disappointment,” said the bounty hunter. “If you see the yellow guy, give me a call.”

The bounty hunter left the establishment, and SpongeBryan walked in through the back entrance five minutes later. He had a pile of hardware supplies in his arms.

“I got the stuff you wanted, and…” SpongeBryan dropped the supplies. “What happened?”

“What happened? What happened?” Sally stood up with a rage in her eyes that SpongeBryan had never seen before. “Why don’t you tell me?”

“Wha…”

“Why are there people after you?” Sally picked up SpongeBryan’s mugshot and threw it to the ground.

“Oh no.” As SpongeBryan looked at the mugshot, he realized that his past had caught up with him. He told Sally everything about his criminal life in Alveus, his escape from prison, and the detective and guard.

“It would’ve been nice if you mentioned some of this during your job application,” said Sally.

“I didn’t know it mattered. It was history…or I thought it was.”

“You know you have to turn yourself in.”

“What?”

“Turn yourself in before more people end up dead! If you don’t, I’ll do it for you.”

“Sally…”

“I never trusted you, not from the moment I met you. Damn it! If only I went with my instinct, none of this would’ve happened.”

“This is all my fault.”

“You think? Just turn yourself in, so nobody else has to go through this horrible nightmare.”

SpongeBryan looked outside and saw that it was raining heavily.

“I know what I’ve got to do,” he said.

SpongeBryan darted out the liquor store, and though the pouring rain, he headed towards the New Life Rehabilitation Center. He had to tell Pat and Ron about this before they or someone they had gotten close to fell victim to their newest threat. All the while, Sally’s words from earlier in the day repeated in his head. We don’t take kindly to stealing.

“What have I done?” whispered SpongeBryan. He only hoped that it wasn’t too late to make everything right.

[JCM]

1,845 words. What am I doing with my life.

 

----

 

Sam

 

The year was 3990. The Pacific Ocean was in its fifth year of combat with the Atlantic. Tens of millions of lives had already been lost on each side, and there was no clear winner among them. Sam, a 16-year-old catfish, fought on the side of the Pacific under General James Milton.

 

Milton was leading a siege on an Atlantic military base when Sam, discovering that his laser gun didn’t work anymore, hurried back to the tank to recharge his weapon. He tried his best to dodge enemy fire, but the sight, the smell, the sounds of death overwhelmed him. Finally, just inches away from the tank, he kneeled in the mud and wept, realizing that the bodies he had stepped on were the bodies of his friends, of the people he had trained with.

 

Suddenly, he felt a sharp pain in his back, and by instinct, he turned around and shot his assailant in the chest. The world around Sam began to spin, and the next thing he saw was a series of bright lights. Sam closed his eyes, and he opened them again to find a man in a surgical mask leaning over him.

 

“You okay?” said the doctor.

 

“Why don’t you tell me?”

 

The doctor laughed. “At least your wound didn’t impair your sense of humor.”

 

“Wound? What are you…oh.”

 

Sam looked down at his stomach, wrapped in a thick white bandage with a large red stain.

 

“Yeah, it was pretty bad,” said the doctor. “The lower part of your spine was blown away, and-“

 

“Why can’t I feel my legs?”

 

“I was getting to that. The lower part of your spine was blown away, and as a result, you’ve been paralyzed from the waist down.”

 

“You mean I can never walk again?”

 

“That is what paralysis means.”

 

“No, this can’t happen! Not to me! I have a family! I have people back home who rely on me? Why did Neptune have to let this happen? Why did Neptune have to let this damn war happen?”

 

“I don’t know,” said the doctor. “Sometimes I wonder if Neptune even cares anymore.”

 

The doctor said goodbye then left the room. Minutes passed after that, but to Sam, they felt like hours. Suddenly, a fish in a neighboring hospital bed spoke to Sam in a weak but determined voice.

 

“I heard what was going on,” said the fish. “And I know somebody who can help you.”

 

“You do?” Sam was suspicious. “What’s in it for you?”

 

“Nothing,” said the fish. “I contracted a disease while on the battlefield, and I won’t be alive for much longer. This is my last act of charity.”

 

The fish handed a slip of paper to Sam. “Call this number. He’ll know what to do.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

The fish nodded.

 

Twenty days later, Sam rolled his new wheelchair into a military research facility.

 

“Hello?” muttered Sam.

 

“Well, well!” A three-eyed frog with a lab coat inspected the crippled catfish. “Yes, yes, you’ll do.”

 

“I’ll do? So you can help me?”
 

“I can do more than help you, old sport! I can make you super! I can make you more powerful than anyone before you!”

 

The frog reached into a treasure chest and pulled out a thin metal rod.

 

“What’s that?” asked Sam.

 

“This…” The frog blew off a layer of dust. “…Is your new spine.”

 

“Why is it made of metal?”

 

“Because it will not only restore your mobility, but it will make you stronger. It acts as a lightning rod, concentrating all the electricity in your body and allowing you to use it as you please. With this spine, you’ll be able to climb up walls, flip boatmobiles over, and shoot energy from your fingers.”

 

“What? Why would I want to do any of that?”

 

“Because you need a new spine, and I’m offering you one. If you want to live the rest of your life in that wheelchair, be my guest. I could easily find another subject for this experiment.”

 

Sam thought about what the frog said for a moment. “Fine. You win. I’ll be your stupid lab rat, but don’t think I’ll enjoy it.”

 

“Don’t worry.” The frog put the rod in Sam’s hands. “You will.”

 

Meanwhile, a thousand miles away, a young mother was holding a baby boy in her arms for the first time.

 

“I know what I’ll call him now,” said the mother. “I’ll call him SpongeBryan.”

 

----

 

The year was 4000. Seas creatures all over the ocean celebrated not only the coming of a new millennium, but the tenth anniversary of their victory in the Pacific-Atlantic War.

 

“…and we never would have gotten that victory,” said a history teacher in an Alvean schoolhouse. “If it wasn’t for our secret weapon – Sam the Electric Man!”

 

A ten-year old SpongeBryan scoffed. “Everybody knows that Electric Man’s a myth.”

 

“No,” said the history teacher. “He’s real. He was all over the news. You’re just too young to remember it. Now, all of you, take out your pencils and paper. We’re about to take notes.”

 

“Why do we have to use pencils and paper, anyway?” whined SpongeBryan. “I heard that the students in the Upper Ring get to use laptops!”

 

“Well, we’re not in the Upper Ring, are we?”

 

SpongeBryan, sensing the irritation in his history teacher’s voice, said nothing else. One day, I’ll have my own laptop, thought SpongeBryan. And I’ll be better at using it than any of those snobs in the Upper Ring!

 

Comforted by that thought, SpongeBryan got out his pencils and paper.

 

----

 

The year was 4014. Pat and Ron sat in the circle of chairs at New Life Rehabilitation Center. After hearing the story of a newcomer, Guy Perchins focused his attention on Ron.

 

“So, are you still doing alright?” said Guy Perchins.

 

“You mean am I still sober?” replied Ron.

 

“I didn’t mean it like tha-“

 

“No, it’s okay. It’ll take some getting used to, but I think I’m hear to stay.”

 

“That’s great to hear,” Perchins said. “Did Jim by any way influence your decision?”

 

Everyone in the room laughed.

 

“If there’s anything Jim’s known for,” Perchins added. “It’s his persistence.”

 

Suddenly, the lights flickered on and off, and Sam, the bounty hunter, trotted into the room.

 

“There somebody here who belongs to me,” said Sam. “Or should I said somebodies?”

 

Pat and Ron stood up.

 

“What do you want?” asked Pat.

 

“I want you two. Somebody’s paying me a lot of money for you guys as well as your yellow hacker friend.”

 

“SpongeBryan?”

 

“That’s him.”

 

“Well, you can’t have us or him.”

 

Sam laughed. “You see, I wasn’t planning on making it a choice.”

 

Sam opened his right hand to reveal a ball of electricity, and he threw it at the brothers. Pat and Ron ducked just in time, and it hit the wall behind them, causing a massive explosion.

 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” shouted Perchins to Sam. “Get out of here right now!”

 

“Not until I get what what I came for,” said Sam.

 

By then, Jim was the only New Life patient (besides Ron) who was still in the room. Some had already run out the door, and the others were scrambling out of the hole in the wall left behind by the explosion.

 

“Holy shrimp,” Sam uttered with a look of surprise. “Jim Carpfish, heir to the Carpfish fortune.”

 

“Carpfish? Where have I heard that name before?” pondered Ron.

 

“Jim Carpfish’s father, Cecil, owns FutureWorks, the largest company in the aquatic world,” explained Sam.

 

Pat and Ron were taken aback. They knew that Jim was rich, but not that rich.

 

“Cecil would pay a fortune if he knew you were in my hands.”

 

“If I go with you,” said Jim. “Will you leave Pat and Ron alone?”

 

Sam thought about it for a second. “Sure. They’re chump change compared to what you’ll bring me.”

 

“Fine,” said Jim.

 

“W-what?” stuttered Ron. “Why would you help us? You don’t even know us.”

 

“I know that this is what I have to do,” said Jim. “You and your friend will get locked up for the rest of your life if I don’t go with him.”

 

“But what about you?” said Pat.

 

“I’ll get a slap on the wrist, at worst. Don’t worry. This was bound to happen, anyway.”

 

Jim left the room with Sam, and Sam suddenly flipped him over and tied his arms and legs together with rope.

 

“What was that for?” said Jim. “I won’t try to escape!”

 

“I know you won’t,” said Sam. “But I want to make sure you don’t interfere when I return to take Pat and Ron along for the ride.”

 

“What?” cried Jim. “You made a deal!”

 

“The only deals that matter to me are the deals I make with the people who pay my bounties.”

 

A stone bounced off the back of Sam’s head. SpongeBryan walked out of the room with Pat and Ron right behind him.

 

“You aren’t leaving with anyone tonight,” said SpongeBryan.

 

Sam laughed. “You think you can stop me with rocks?”

 

“No, but I can stop you with this.”

 

SpongeBryan pulled out a laser gun, and Sam immediately knocked it out of his hand with an electric discharge. SpongeBryan was baffled at first, but then he remembered the stories his history teacher told him about Electric Man.

 

“So, you’re not a myth after all,” he said.

 

Sam shot another spark of electricity at SpongeBryan, but he dodged it.

 

“Tell me,” SpongeBryan said. “Why would a war hero like you get such a crummy job as this?”

 

“Even war heroes got to pay the bills,” replied Sam.

 

Pat and Ron attempted to break the ropes around Jim’s arms and legs.

”It’s no use,” said Jim. “Just leave me here.”

 

“No!” said Ron. “We’re not going to abandon you. Not again.”

 

Sam noticed Pat and Ron trying to free Jim, and he grabbed them, shocking them both until they passed out. SpongeBryan sprinted for his laser gun, but Sam caught him by the legs and sent a pulse of current through his body that knocked him out, as well. Seeing that SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron were completely incapacitated, Sam dialed the number of Arthur, the detective, on his wrist-phone.

 

“Hello?” said a voice on the phone.

 

“Arthur, is that you?” asked Sam. “Why isn’t your hologram turned on?”

 

“I like to respect my privacy, if you don’t mind.”

 

“Whatever. I’m just letting you know that I captured your fugitives. I’ll meet you at the same coral tree at the same time tomorrow.”

 

“Excellent.”

 

The voice on the other end of phone belonged to the one-eyed leader of the fish who killed the detective. The leader hung up and turned to his followers.

 

“Buckle up, boys,” said the leader. “This is gonna be a bumpy ride.”

[JCM]

Good things come to those who wait.

 

----

 

Revelations and Revolution

 

The sky was the first thing SpongeBryan saw when he came into consciousness. Dark and muddled, just like his memory at the time. What happened? How did I get here? he thought. He tried to move his arms and his legs, but he couldn’t. He tried to say something, but there was a towel stuck in his mouth. He turned his head. Pat and Ron were lying next to him in the same condition. Neither of them were awake yet.

 

“Where is he?” uttered a voice.

 

SpongeBryan recognized the voice, and suddenly, memories of his skirmish with Sam came flooding back to him. Before he could make anything of those memories, he was distracted by the sound of a boat’s door closing.

 

“Sorry we’re late,” said a voice that was different from the first.

 

SpongeBryan didn’t recognize the second voice. He tried to sit up, but his body was still in pain from the electric jolt. He opted instead to just raise his head, and he saw Sam talking to a fish in a brown trenchcoat and hat.

 

“You’re not Arthur,” said Sam.

 

“Good eye,” said the fish. “Now give us who we came here for.”

 

“Not until you tell me who you are.”

 

“Don’t make this difficult for yourself.”

 

“Do you know who I am?”

 

“Do you know who we are?”

 

The fish removed his trenchcoat to reveal that he was actually two fish, one standing atop of the other. The fish separated and took out their laser guns.

 

“How cute,” said Sam before knocking the laser guns out of the fishes’ hands with electric sparks.

 

SpongeBryan turned to Pat and Ron and gave them a slight nudge with his tied-together feet. Pat and Ron opened their eyes, looked down at themselves, and attempted to scream.

 

“Tell me who you are,” said Sam, holding the two fish by their gill slits.

 

“Never!” said one of the fish.

 

“Besides,” said the other. “Those laser guns were just a distraction to keep you from noticing the fish coming up behind you.”

 

“Wha-“

 

A pair of mutant fish grabbed Sam by the arms, and another placed a bag over his head.

 

“Let go of me!” cried Sam as bursts of electricity exploded from his palms.

 

“What would the fun be in that?” said another voice behind Sam.

 

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron turned their heads just enough to see the owner of the voice. It was another fish, this one tall, muscular, and with a single blinking eye.

 

Sam chuckled. “You think just because I can’t see anything I can’t electrocute you and your mooks right now?”

 

“If you had been able to electrocute us, you would have done it by now,” said the one-eyed fish.

 

Sam was baffled. “Don’t you know about me? I fought off entire Atlantic armies by myself!”

 

“Yes,” said the one-eyed fish. “I’m sure you were capable of that twenty years ago, but you’re getting old, and I can see it.”

 

Sam tried to turn around and attack the one-eyed fish, but the mutants who were holding his arms tightened their grips.

 

“Yes,” said the one-eyed fish. “You aren’t nearly as powerful as you make yourself out to be. You operate on fear, and that’s usually good enough to suffice when you’re out hunting criminals, but you’ll have to do a lot more than shoot lightning bolts out of your hands to scare me.”

 

“What do you want?” screamed Sam.

 

“You know what I want.”

 

“The yellow guy? His freak friends?”

 

“Yes, but first, I must ensure that you’ll never be a threat to us again.”

 

The one-eyed fish took out a weapon that was unlike any other weapon SpongeBryan, Pat, or Ron had ever seen.

 

“Wh-what’s going on?” asked Sam, noticeably frightened. “Take this damn bag off my head! I can’t breathe!”

 

“Don’t worry,” said the one-eyed fish as he pointed the weapon at Sam’s back.”This’ll only hurt for a minute.”

 

The weapon powered up, then it let out a beam so deafening that many of the mutants had to cover their ears. Sam felt electrical sensations all over his body, and when they stopped, he felt his spine break in half.

 

“How are you feeling?” said the one-eyed fish with a smirk.

 

Sam was in such immense pain that he was unable to speak. He believed that he would die at any moment. He hoped that he would die. The agony was getting to be too much for him. 

 

SpongeBryan, recovering from his own pain, managed to stand upright and hop into the one-eyed fish’s view. Pat and Ron followed suit.

 

The one-eyed fish removed the bag from Sam’s head. “It seems we didn’t need you after all.”

 

“Why?” was the only word Sam could muster from his mouth.

 

“Because we found your fugitives, that’s why.”

 

“No.” Sam pointed to his broken spine. “Why?”

 

“When you’re at war,” said the one-eyed fish. “You leave no stone unturned.”

 

Mutants cut apart the rope that bound SpongeBryan’s arms and legs.

 

“War?” SpongeBryan whispered as the towel that gagged him fell to his feet.

 

“There’s somebody else!” shouted Ron the second he was able to talk. “Jim Carpfish! He was left behind in Electric Man’s boat!”

 

The one-eyed fish looked surprised for a moment, but then he nodded.

 

“I’ll send some people to find him,” he said. “But first, we’ve gotta get you two to safety.”

 

“Who are you?” asked Ron.

 

“I’ll answer that and more once we get to the HQ,” said the one-eyed fish.

 

“The HQ?” Pat and Ron looked at each other.

 

A small group of mutants threw Sam’s weakened body into the trunk of their boat. SpongeBryan, Pat and Ron squeezed into the boat’s back seat with the rest of the mutants, and the one-eyed fish sat in the front seat. The one-eyed fish pushed coordinates into a touchpad on the dashboard, and everything around them turned into a fast-moving blur. SpongeBryan made out the greyness of clouds and the sapphire of scallops in the blur and realized that the boat they were in was flying.

 

I haven’t seen this kind of advanced technology since our last visit to the Upper Ring, thought SpongeBryan. Can I really trust these people?

 

The boat came to a halt, and the one-eyed fish announced, “We’re here!”

 

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ran stumbled out the boat, dizzy from its speed and sudden stop.

 

“These rides can take a lot of you, I know,” said the one-eyed fish. “You get used to them.”

 

“So where’s the HQ?” said Pat.

 

“Right under you.”

 

Ron stomped a foot, and he heard an echo. Pat and Ron leaned down and started wiping away sand until a wooden door was clearly visible.

 

Ron stared at the one-eyed fish with a bewildered expression. “Who are you again?”

 

The one-eyed fish used a crowbar to open the wooden doors, and he climbed down a ladder to an underground base.

 

“Come on!” said the one-eyed fish.

 

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron cautiously descended into the base behind the mutants.

 

The base was not elaborate; in fact, it seemed to have been constructed in two or three days. Despite this, SpongeBryan was amazed that such a thing would ever exist, much less that he’d be standing in one. He found the one-eyed fish sitting at a table with three empty chairs.

 

“Have a seat, make yourself comfortable,” said the one-eyed fish. “I’ll have some of my guys bring you coffee.”

 

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron sat in the empty chairs.

 

“Why did you help us?” said Pat.

 

“Because you’re important to our movement,” said the one-eyed fish.

 

“What movement?”

 

A fish with four arms came out of another room and gave SpongeBryan, Pat and Ron a cup of coffee each.

 

“Thanks,” said SpongeBryan.

 

The fish bowed then went back into the other room.

 

“So,” said the one-eyed fish. “You wanted to know my name.”

 

“Yes,” said Ron. “Among other things.”

 

“I’ve gone through a range of identities in my lifetime,” said the one-eyed fish. “But most people call me Cyclops nowadays.”

 

“Cyclops,” repeated Pat. “What an…interesting name.”

 

“Yes,” replied Cyclops. “But you’ll find that my name is the least interesting thing about me.”

 

Cyclops stood up from his chair and headed for the other room.

 

“Coming?” he asked.

 

SpongeBryan, Pat, and Ron shrugged and followed Cyclops into the other room. They looked around and saw dozens of mutants either tapping away at laptops or convening with each other about the news.

 

“This…is the future,” said Cyclops. “Our future.”

 

“What’s going on?” asked SpongeBryan.

 

“I guess I’ve been putting it off long enough,” said Cyclops. “It’s time that you know the truth.”

 

Cyclops walked over to the coffee-maker, put a mug under it, pressed a button, and watched the warm brown liquid fall into it.

 

“You know,” he said. “My mother used to tell me stories of a time when the sky wasn’t this dark. Hundreds, thousands of years ago, it was brighter. Colorful, filled with clouds shaped as flowers.”

 

“Yes, that’s a nice fairy tale,” said Pat. “But what does that have to do with any of this?”

 

Cyclops took a sip from his coffee mug.

 

“Alveus, just like the sky, has gotten dark,” he said. “It used to be a nice place, where everyone got treated equally, but as the income gap widened and technology slowly but surely make the working man extinct, that changed. Today, equality is little more than a dream. Folks like us get taken advantage of because we’re different, because we’re poor. The elitists in the Upper Ring think of us as nothing more than insects to step on whenever they get bored of us. I know this firsthand.”

 

Cyclops took another sip from the coffee mug.

 

“When I was 13,” he continued. “A drunken man broke into our house and started doing awful things to my mother. My mother tried to escape, but the offender was too strong, and after a violent struggle, she ended up dead. I tried to tell the police, but the man who killed my mother was a high-status socialite, and they wouldn’t touch him. I went to the man’s house, and all he did was say a half-assed ‘sorry’, put a 50-dollar bill in my hand, and tell me to have a good life.”

 

Cyclops finished off the coffee and put the mug on top of the coffee-maker.

 

“The mutants around me all have similar stories of abuses by the Upper Ring,” he went on. “We’re sick and tired of letting the wealthy get away with what they do to us, so we’re going to change the system for the better. We’re going to be the sparks that lead the way to a brighter future, and we plan to do it through insurgency.”

 

“Insurgency? Like rebellion?” asked Ron.

 

“Yes,” replied Cyclops.

 

SpongeBryan was hysterical  “Why are we so important to this rebellion? Why did you track us down? Why did you save us?”

 

“Because, SpongeBryan,” said Cyclops. “Your escape from jail was what encouraged us to start this rebellion in the first place.”

 

“What? But that happened a few weeks ago.”

 

“Well, there were always rumblings before that, but your open act of defiance was something we had never seem before. It inspired us. We made you the symbol of this insurgency.”

 

“Wow, I’m flattered.”

 

“Wait a minute!” said Ron. “How do you plan to carry out this rebellion?”

 

“Well,” said Cyclops. “First, we’ll cut off all the electricity to Alveus, then we’ll burn the Upper Ring to the ground.”

 

“What?” Ron was horrified. “You’re going to kill every living soul in the Upper Ring just because a couple of them wronged you?”

 

“It’s not just a couple! You’re a mutant! You know how vicious they all are.”

 

“Even so, they don’t deserve to be massacred!”

 

Cyclops sighed. “Listen, starfish, you’re either with us or against us, and if you’re against us, we’ll have no choice but to imprison you.”

 

“I agree with my brother,” said Pat. “This is too harsh.”

 

Cyclops growled. “I should have known that you two would have opposed this! Our uprising sprouted from SpongeBryan escaping from jail, and you’re the ones who got him sent to jail in the first place!”

 

“What? That’s crazy!” laughed SpongeBryan. “Right, guys?”

 

Pat and Ron were silent.

 

“Right, guys?” SpongeBryan said this in a much softer voice.

 

A pair of mutants grabbed Pat and Ron’s arms, and they dragged them into another room.

 

Cyclops patted SpongeBryan on the back. “Forget those traitors! We’re about to take back Alveus, and you’re about to lead us!”

 

SpongeBryan was still in shock. “M-m-m-me?”

 

“Yes, so you better get prepared. The revolution starts tomorrow!”

 

SpongeBryan fainted.

[JCM]

11. Back to Alveus

 

Joe, the Alvean chief of police, dragged his feet into his office at the police station after yet another night with no sleep. Arthur, his son, was still out looking for the fugitive SpongeBryan,  and he hadn’t given Joe a call on his wristphone in over a week. Something inside Joe was telling him that something was wrong, that something terrible had happened to his only son. He didn’t have time to investigate, however, because of a recent string of robberies in the Upper Ring. Most of the items lost in the robberies were laptops, food, and furniture, and it was of grave concern to Joe, whose job was already on the line after the fiasco with SpongeBryan.

 

Joe started to look through the details of the cases again, hoping he’d catch something he missed, when the lights in his office shut off.

 

“What the hell?” whispered Joe.

 

Joe walked out of his office and found that the lights in the entire police station were off. He walked out of the station and found that the lights were off everywhere.

 

“A blackout,” said Joe. “Perfect.”

 

Suddenly, Joe heard a thundering of footsteps, and the thought dawned on him: If there was no electricity, what was keeping the prisoners in their cells?

 

Joe turned around and saw a stampede of convicts heading right towards him. Without thinking, he turned back around and ran, pressing a button on his wristphone to contact the mayor.

 

“Oh no!” cried Joe. “There’s no signal!”

 

Joe tripped on a rock, twisting his ankle and sending him straight into the seabed. He tried to get back up, but the pain in his ankle was too enormous, and he fell flat on his face again.

 

“Well,” said one of the prisoners as he caught up with Joe. “Look what we have here.”

 

The rest of the prisoners surrounded the defeated police chief and took various sharp objects out of their pockets. They looked down at Joe with menacing smiles on their faces.

 

----

 

SpongeBryan was only a few feet away from the Upper Ring of Alveus, flying there with rocket boots courtesy of Cyclops and his mutant army, who weren’t far behind.

 

“Look at our work,” gloated Cyclops. “I assembled a team of hackers from all parts of the Lower Ring to figure out a way to disable the town’s electrical and wireless grids. Now that we’ve succeeded, there’s nothing that the Establishment will be able to do to stop us. This war is ours!”

 

The mutants cheered. SpongeBryan reluctantly joined them.

 

“Here’s a good place to land,” said Cyclops. “See those stout trouts gathering in the middle of the street there?  I say it’s time we show them their executors.”

 

The mutants cheered again and dove through the shallowing water. SpongeBryan lingered above them for a second then quickly followed.

 

The crowd of Upper Ring denizens continued to grow, and as it did, they became more agitated.

 

“What the hell is going on?” said one fish in the crowd.

 

“It’s the end of the world!” said another.

 

“People, people, please.” Cyclops lowered himself in front of the crowd, with SpongeBryan and the mutant army at his back.

 

“Who are you?” said someone in the crowd.

 

“What are you?” said someone else.

 

“My name is Cyclops, and I have all the answers you want, though you might not like them.”

 

Murmurs trickled through the crowd.

 

“For years, our kind has been oppressed by you all,” said Cyclops. “For years, we’ve done nothing about it. That ends today.”

 

Cyclops took a firecracker out of a bag he had strapped to his shoulder. He pressed a button on the firecracker that ignited it immediately, and he threw it through the window of a nearby house. SpongeBryan recognized the house as once belonging to Old Man Rogers. He shielded his eyes as the house exploded in a colorful commotion of debris..

 

“This is what will happen to all of your homes,” Cyclops announced to the crowd. “And none of you will live to tell anyone about it.”

 

“No!” came a shriek from the crowd.

 

A female fish with a baby in her arms struggled out the crowd.

 

“Please,” she said. “You can kill me, you can kill all these people, but please spare my child. He’s done nothing to deserve this.”

 

Cyclops stared at the woman for a moment then struck her with the back of his hand. She fell to the ground with a swelling cheek, still clutching the baby in her arms.

 

“None of you will live!” repeated Cyclops. “You all must atone for your sins against the common man!”

 

“Coward!” came another cry from the crowd.

 

“Who said that?” roared Cyclops.

 

“I did.” The owner of the voice revealed himself, and SpongeBryan couldn’t believe who it was.

 

“Octhomas?” blurted SpongeBryan.

 

“You two know each other?” Cyclops said, moving his head back and forth between them.

 

“Yes,” grunted Octhomas. “He’s paid many a visit to my house. I never thought you’d be working with terrorists, SpongeBryan! I thought you were just a petty thief!”

 

“You will respect our leader!” screamed Cyclops.

 

Octhomas laughed. “Is that what you’re calling him?”

 

Cyclops pulled a laser gun out of his pocket and pointed it at the cephalopod’s forehead.

 

SpongeBryan jumped in front of him. “No!”

 

“Why are you protecting that insolent worm?” snarled Cyclops.

 

“Can’t you see?” said SpongeBryan. “You’re treating these people exactly the way they treated you, the way they treated your mother.”

 

SpongeBryan pointed to the woman with the swollen cheek. “That baby she’s holding could have been you.”

 

Cyclops reddened with anger. “How dare you compare my mother to those bottom feeders!”

 

“Well, it’s true,” asserted SpongeBryan. “Look at all you’ve done! All the destruction you’ve caused! Can you really say that you’re better than them?”

 

“You’re starting to sound like your starfish friends.”

 

“My starfish friends were right! This whole thing is going too far! You, all of you are becoming the monsters you’re fighting!”

 

Cyclops pocketed his laser gun and addressed the mutant army.

 

“I think we know what needs to be done here,” he said. “All in favor of impeaching SpongeBryan and re-appointing me as leader of the insurgents, raise your hands.”

 

Every mutant in the army raised his hand except one.

 

“I’m sorry,” said Cyclops, turning back to SpongeBryan. “But you are no longer our leader. And as the new leader, I order that you leave this city and never return!”

 

“Fine!” SpongeBryan ripped off his uniform and threw it to the ground. “I never wanted to be a part of this stupid revolution in the first place!”

 

With that, SpongeBryan ignited his rocket boots and flew into the distance. The mutant that didn’t vote to impeach him snuck away from the rest of the army and flew off after SpongeBryan when he was sure that the others wouldn’t notice him.

 

----

 

Pat and Ron, their arms and legs tied together by strong rope, were sleeping in a dark cellar under the insurgency’s headquarters. They were awoken by the sound of the cellar door opening.

 

“Huh? Are you letting us go now?” asked Ron..

 

“Don’t count on it,” said the guard before throwing another prisoner into the cellar and closing the door.

 

“Hey, Pat. Hey, Ron,” said the prisoner.

 

“Jim Carpfish?” Pat and Ron said at the same time.

 

Jim laughed. “Yeah, it’s me.”

 

“What are you doing here?” asked Pat.

 

“Well, during yesterday’s waking hours, shortly after Electric Man left his boat with you two, I managed to hop out of the boat and roll into a deep trench a couple of yards away. I rubbed the rope around my arms on a rock at the bottom of the trench in the hope that it’d be able to cut through.

 

“After about an hour of rubbing, I heard some noises near Electric Man’s boat, and I peeked out of the trench to see what it was  A pair of weird-looking fish started going through the boat, looking for me, and I heard one of them mention that I’d get them and their ‘boss’ a lot of money. Hearing that, I knew I couldn’t trust them, and I ducked back into the trench. Once I was sure that they were gone, I started rubbing on the rock again, and I was almost completely through the rope by the time the weird-looking fish came back.

 

“This time, the fish were determined to find me. They looked around the boat until one of the fish found my wallet. I didn’t even realize that it fell out. Surprisingly, I didn’t hear any other noises after that, and once I was sure that the coast was clear, I started rubbing on the rock again.

 

“It took another hour, but I managed to get all the way through the rope. With the restraints around my arms gone, I was able to pull the towel out of my mouth and untie my legs without much difficulty. Climbing out of the trench, I saw that the weird-looking fish were sleeping in Electric Man’s boat. They had apparently figured that I’d come back for my wallet and fell asleep patrolling from the boat. I actually spotted my wallet in the back seat of the boat, and like the idiot I was, I decided to try and retrieve it.

 

“I tiptoed to the back of the boat and reached for my wallet, but my legs had been tied together for so long that I was barely used to standing on them, much less leaning. Basically, my legs gave out right as I got ahold of the wallet, and I fell onto the top of the trunk with a loud clang. The fish woke up, and I tried to run away, but my legs were still weak, and the fish caught up with me easily. They threw me into the trunk of a different boat, and then they drove here, where they had me thrown into this cellar. Guys? Guys?”

 

Pat and Ron were asleep.

 

“I don’t think they liked your story,” said a different voice.

 

Jim yelped. “Who said that?”

 

“Don’t worry,” said the voice. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

 

Jim followed the voice to a corner of the crowded cellar, where Sam, looking several years older than when Jim last saw him, sat with a gloomy expression on his face.

 

“Do Pat and Ron know you’re here?” inquired Jim.

 

Sam nodded. “They didn’t really want to talk to me. So I left them alone.”

 

“How do you know I want to talk to you?” Jim said with as much coldness as he could muster.

 

“You seem like you would talk to anyone right now.”

 

Jim sighed. “You’re right. I just never wanted things to be like this. I escaped to Insulam so I could have a new life, and now my old life is coming back in the most unpleasant of ways.”

 

“I know how you feel,” said Sam. “I took up this bounty hunting job so I could be away from home as much as possible. What with all the celebrity pressure and having a son who-“

 

“Wait,” interrupted Jim. “How did these mutants manage to capture you in the first place? Don’t you have that superpower that lets you shoot electricity from your hands?”

 

“Not anymore. They used this strange device on me that got rid of all that. Now I’m just as much of a useless cripple as I was before I got that ‘superpower’.”

 

“Strange device? Oh no. That must be the electrosonic raygun that somebody stole from my dad’s company.”

 

“Electrosonic what now?”

 

“An electrosonic raygun. It combines sound waves with electromagnetic energy to create a beam powerful enough to defeat you in combat. My father had it made with the intention of getting the Pacific Ocean’s enemies to bid on it, but I managed to talk him out of doing so, and he had it stored in the company vault from then on. Right before you kidnapped me in Insulam, I read in the news about an important weapon being stolen from the FutureWorks headquarters. From the description, I knew it was the raygun.”

 

“So, the one-eyed freak must have known that he’d be facing off against me. He said something, right after shooting me with that electrosonic whatever-you-called-it: ‘When you’re at war, you leave no stone unturned.’”

 

“Well, he sure didn’t.” Jim looked up at the cellar door, worry lines developing on his forehead. “He sure didn’t.”

 

----

 

SpongeBryan floated in the sky, staring into Alveus from just outside its city line. A pair of fins tapped him on the shoulder, and he recoiled in surprise, seeing a fish with four arms floating next to him.

 

“Wh-who are you?” SpongeBryan stuttered.

 

“My name is Wally. I’m with the insurgency.”

 

“What are you doing out here?”

 

“I just wanted to let you know that I agree with what you said about us going too far. I joined this army thinking that we could do some good for this city, and all we’ve done is cause more pain and devastation. I’m ashamed that I didn’t desert earlier.”

 

“So you aren’t with them anymore? You quit?”

 

“That’s what I’m saying, yeah.”

 

“Good.” SpongeBryan turned and started speeding off.

 

“Where are you going?” asked Wally, catching up him.

 

“I’m flying to HQ to free my friends. Even if they did betray me, I’m not going to be a jerk and do the same thing to them.”

 

Wally sighed. “I know what it’s like to betray somebody. My father is locked up, too, and I was so angry at him for abandoning me that I didn’t even try to help him.”

 

“Who’s your father?”

 

“You probably know him as Electric Man.”

 

SpongeBryan gasped.

 

 “My dad was always in the public eye,” Wally continued. “And he always had to hide me. I guess he was embarrassed to have a mutant son. One day, he just decided to leave me and my mother and take up a career as a bounty hunter. We never saw him again. That was three years ago.”

 

“Im sorry.”

 

“Don’t be. We were drifting apart, anyhow. I moved to the Lower Ring a year ago to be with other mutants, and that’s where I heard about the insurgency. I thought it’d be a good way to reform our broken system, but had I known how they wanted to go about it, I would have never joined.”

 

SpongeBryan looked at his watch. “We’re getting closer to the HQ. Once I free my friends, I’ll figure out what to do from there.”

 

“Well, the public execution of the Upper Ring-ers won’t start for another 8 hours or so. Cyclops wants everybody in the Lower Ring present for the ceremony.”

 

“Then we won’t have much time.” SpongeBryan pressed a button on both of his rocket boots. “I’m putting these babies on overdrive.”

 

Wally did the same with his rocket boots, and both of them hurtled for the headquarters, steadying themselves with their hands.

 

----

 

Jim was the first of the prisoners to see the light enter as SpongeBryan opened the cellar door.

 

“SpongeBryan?” Jim rubbed his eyes. “SpongeBryan! It is you!”

 

“What’s this about a sea lion?” Ron muttered as he awoke.

 

Pat was already awake. “Not sea lion, you idiot! SpongeBryan!”

 

SpongeBryan pulled Pat, Ron, and Jim out of the cellar, and Pat and Ron embraced him with all their might.

 

“Listen,” said Ron. “About what happened at the police station…I was drunk, and-“

 

SpongeBryan cut Ron’s apology short. “It doesn’t matter. We have bigger things to worry about now.”

 

Wally peered into the cellar. “Dad?”

 

Sam looked up from his corner of the cellar. “Wally?”

 

Using a sudden burst of strength, Sam grabbed the edges of the cellar’s doorway and pulled himself out. Wally wrapped his arms around his father’s neck, and Sam couldn’t stop the tears gushing from his eyes.

 

“I’m sorry,” choked Sam. “For everything.”

 

“I know,” whispered Wally.

 

SpongeBryan poked at an unconscious guard on the floor with his foot. “These guys won’t stay knocked out forever, so we should probably leave. I’ll explain everything on the way back to Alveus.”

 

SpongeBryan, Pat, Ron, Jim, Sam, and Wally rushed out the headquarters. SpongeBryan climbed into the jet-boat situated just outside the HQ and beckoned for the others to come in with him,

 

“I hope I remember how to do this,” SpongeBryan said as they piled into the jet-boat.

 

SpongeBryan pushed his hometown’s coordinates into the boat’s touchpad, and a millisecond later, they were gone.