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Metal Snake

Crazy Celes

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Yes, this is real. The pilot before the real pilot is coming January 18, 2018. Have a real preview before then that looks totally fake, even

though it's real.

 

"Corny music from the 80s began to play alongside the lost opening credits to Full SBC. The theme song to the show came on as the

plane took off. Another cameraman outside showed us the colorful exterior of the plane. Bowls of fresh fruit were painted all over it, and

on the side of it, the name of the vehicle, “The Fruity Plane”, was engraved in the metal. As the plane soared into the sky, the lyrics to

the theme song could be heard…

 

How could we ever predict the dignivility?

 

The milkman and the paperboy trying to kill meeeee!

 

How did I get to living here?

 

Somebody tell me please!

 

This new show’s confusing me

 

With clouds as mean as you’ve ever seen

 

Ain’t a bird who knows your tune

 

“I don’t understand kids these days!” a bird who looked remarkably like the Twitter bird sang, holding out his cell phone

that showed a list of emojis."

 

Made in China

Edited by jjsthekid
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Episode 1: Pilot Before Pilot

 

The sun was shining on a bright and sunny day.

 

The police are onto me!” a woman who was dressed in a blue pilot’s uniform and sounded like a man pretending to be a woman yelled as she turned off the radio on the plane she was piloting, which had apparently just informed her about the weather.

 

“What was that?” a passenger behind her asked.

 

“Me screaming!” the woman, who had her face partially obscured by her pilot’s cap, retorted as she turned to the interrogator behind her. “What did you think it was, me whispering?!”

 

A guy behind the woman began to laugh.

 

“Did I say something funny, mister?!” the woman hollered angrily.

 

“...Yyyeeesss.” the guy, who was revealed to be Elastic Dog, said like Stewie Griffin would.

 

“Oh, well thank you for the compliment.” the woman replied, having abruptly become calm.

 

“Be careful,” she warned the audience, turning to face them, breaking the fourth wall, “I am known to mood swing for the sake of the plot! But what is the plot, you might ask? Let’s go to IMDb for the answer!”

 

“This was the plot listed for the episode, “Pilot Before Pilot”, of the series, “Rusty’s Raping Rampage Rip-Off”, on IMDb, and it reads as follows!” a guy on a Youtube channel notorious for regurgitating internet news articles exclaimed, as it was revealed that this was what was being shown to the passengers for entertainment.

 

“On a quest to bring new, original, family-friendly, and advertiser-friendly fun to the internet, an insane demon god flies users from The Spongebob Community to America, where there will be no escape, and, as IMDb puts it, NO REFUNDS after she crashes the plane into the Twin Towers!” the guy continued reporting to all of the people behind the woman, who were revealed to be passengers on a plane. “And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen! IMDb is now advertising anti-consumerist practices as some sort of joke!”

 

“Thanks for the information that I couldn’t have just looked up myself, bro!” one of the passengers who was revealed to be Jjs exclaimed, quoting the Jesus meme. “God, why is Youtube content such garbage these days?”

 

“Thank jesus for h3h3” SOF chimed in.


 

“h3h3: bad channel” President Squidward threw in his two cents.

 

“Please,” said Clappy, “you haven’t seen real garbage on Youtube until you’ve seen Jake and Logan Paul. Who here hasn’t heard by now about that scumbag Logan making fun of a suicide victim?”

 

“Who here hasn’t heard the ricegum diss track” Aquatic Nuggets said.

 

As Metal Snake listened to the SBC members talking amongst themselves about Youtube, he wondered to himself…

 

“Hmm...should I bring up iDubbbz’s latest Content Cop or should I not...should I bring up iDubbbz or should I not…”

 

And as Metal Snake continued to think to himself, the camera began to zoom out ominously...as the cameraman walked back to the pilot room to be courteous to the waiter who was also a flight attendant, making way for him to deliver refreshments to the passengers. When he entered the pilot room, the crazy woman’s chair turned around in a foreboding way to face the cameraman.

 

“Mwa ha ha ha ha…” the pilot snickered evilly, holding out a photo of Metal Snake that the camera focused in on. “I know what you’re thinking, and you’re wrong. Everything up until now has been a ruse. This is not a show about raping SBC members (BECAUSE THAT WOULD PROMOTE RAPE CULTURE!) and it’s not about this obnoxious, arrogant asshole…”

 

The woman then took off her pilot’s hat as the camera moved up to show her full face…

 

“It’s about THIS obnoxious, arrogant asshole!” the woman who was revealed to be Crazy Celes, the insane demon god from Spiriting Fluttershy’s Dark Sky (OH MY GOD READ THAT IT’S VITAL TO THE PLOT) proudly introduced herself. “Welcome to hell!”

 

And with that, corny music from the 80s began to play alongside the lost opening credits to Full SBC. The theme song (or at least what Crazy Celes called the theme song) to the show came on as the plane took off. Another cameraman outside showed us the colorful exterior of the plane. Bowls of fresh fruit were painted all over it, and on the side of it, the name of the vehicle, “The Fruity Plane”, was engraved in the metal. As the plane soared into the sky, the lyrics to the theme song could be heard…

 

How could we ever predict the dignivility?

 

The milkman and the paperboy trying to kill meeeee!

 

How did I get to living here?

 

Somebody tell me please!

 

This new show’s confusing me

 

With clouds as mean as you’ve ever seen

 

As that part of the song played, Crazy Celes flew past clouds that had formed the shape of a mist dragon.

 

Ain’t a bird who knows your tune

 

“I don’t understand kids these days!” a bird who looked remarkably like the Twitter bird sang, holding out his cell phone that showed a list of emojis.

 

Then a little voice inside you whispers

 

Kids don’t sell your dreams so soon!

 

“Hey kids, say no to drugs!” Crazy Celes exclaimed. It was revealed that she had just been hallucinating as part of a symptom of her insanity, and nothing that had happened in the sky while the song was playing had actually transpired. “Plot twist!”

 

Unfortunately, while Celes was distracted by her hallucination, she didn’t notice the other plot twist that was going on behind her.

 

*BANG* *BANG*

 

Into the room where the passengers were, the cameraman returned to find that two gunshots had gone through Clappy and Jelly, and they had fallen to the ground dead. The camera moved to the right, after the cameraman kicked a crate out of the way, and it was revealed that the killer was…

 

Everywhere you look, everywhere you go

 

There’s a Cha! There’s a Cha! Waiting round every bed!

 

*one conspiracy theory with Aquatic Nuggets later*

 

...Great Scott! Who killed Clappy and Jelly? Who is next to be prey in the killer’s hands? Will the waiter make it out okay? Who are the mysterious cameramen, really? Why am I asking you all these questions? Find out the answers to all of them...right now.

 

A guy named Jeffrey Scott, Metal Snake and the waiter, no, Adrian Bruce and her brother, Felix Bruce, and because that’s the joke.

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Episode 2: The Real Pilot

 

From where we last left off…

 

Felix Bruce, the cameraman who was filming the outside of the plane, was still standing where it last was.

 

“I...need to follow that plane, don’t I?” he said, bristling the back of his neck, embarrassed.

 

Fortunately, our second camera captured some important footage…

 

However, on the plane, it was revealed that Adrian, the one who was filming inside the plane, had abandoned duty to fight, throwing the camera to the floor. SOF had since picked it up, and was now running back and forth with it, trying to parody Cloverfield for the lulz. Meanwhile, Adrian was interrogating Jeffrey Scott, the one who had murdered Clappy and Jelly, punching and kicking him in his chair.

 

“Give it up already, you rat bastard!” she yelled at him before she smacked in the face and made him cough up blood. “This isn’t some game of “Good Cop, Bad Cop”, you either tell me, or you get to suffer some more before you tell me!”

 

“I already told you everything I know!” Jeffrey claimed. “My name is Jeffrey Scott! I JUST WOKE UP AND FOUND OUT THAT I PROBABLY IMPULSIVELY MURDERED TWO PEOPLE! I DON’T KNOW WHY I DID IT, I MUST HAVE AMNESIA OR SOMETHING! FUCK YOU, MAN!”

 

“Oh, well okay, fuck you too.” Adrian retorted before she grabbed a frying pan off the waiter’s cart and whacked the killer in the head with it, knocking him out. “I was just bluffing, I’m willing to give you the benefit of the doubt you had no motive. I’d prefer to find out more about this shit myself rather than play around with you. Besides, I want to take a break now.”

 

“Oh no you don’t…” CDCB said as he pulled out his gun. 70s pulled out his gun as well, and the two of them shot the waiter and Metal Snake (the bullets entered their hearts, killing them instantly). They also shot Adrian (the bullets they fired at her, she deflected with the frying pan).

 

“Looks like they figured out our little secret, eh, CDCB?” 70s told his killing friend as they shared a cartoonish laugh together, one that was quickly interrupted by Adrian grabbing another frying pan off the waiter’s cart and smacking them both in the heads too.

 

“What secret would that be, the fact that you’re both fucking crazy?!” she remarked as she knocked them out and they fell to the floor unconscious. “Something’s wrong here, there has to be a reason the passengers on this plane are going nuts and killing each other...it must be Crazy Celes. Her aura of insanity must be spreading to the passengers, making them become crazy enough to murder people!”

 

Spongetron overheard this and gasped.

 

“People?!” she exclaimed at the mention. “You mean…”

 

She gasped when she saw the body of Metal Snake lying dead in the seat.

 

“LUKE!” she yelled. “NNNNNOOOOO!!!!!”

 

She continued screaming, “NNNNNOOOOO!!!!!”, as she went over to Metal Snake, then hummed, “Doo-doo-doo…”, as she tiptoed around Clappy and Jelly’s bodies and put the waiter’s body on his cart nicely before kicking it out of the way, then carried on with yelling, “NNNNNOOOOO!!!!!”, until she reached his seat. She then started singing the first exercise song from the end credits of Yo-Kai Watch, as the other people on the plane gave her looks of bemusement.

 

“How disrespectful.” Steel remarked. “That was already an extremely rude, self-centered, thoughtless, mean-spirited, and sloppy act to only care enough about the waiter to give him a proper send-off, and then she has to sing such unfitting music to her “love”, whom while I understand had not been the best person to his fans, lying to them and plagiarizing the work of Elastic and Jjsthekid, still deserved better.”

 

“...Thanks, Hamlet?” Adrian thought to herself. “Why am I still sticking around here? I need to go take care of that crazy bitch before I end up losing it…”

 

After Adrian went to the pilots room to confront Celes, Wumbo felt he had to let something out…

 

“Man, what Steel just said cheesed me off!” he yelled. “No one cares that Luke was shit to his fans! You got that, everyone except Steel?!”

 

“Eh, I can see how it’s a bit disrespectful.” Jjs remarked. “I will give Steel credit though for making the most confusing eulogy I’ve ever seen.”

 

But alas, Jjs’ attempt to remain neutral failed to quell the inexplicable rage that was rising amongst the community (unsurprisingly). Eventually, SOF had to let something out as well. He threw the camera down, and at the same time the entertainment being shown to the passengers switched to an Emperor Lemon YTP playing the notorious clip from Snakes on a Plane, he yelled…

 

“ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!”

He ran over to where Metal Snake’s body was, pushed Spongetron aside, then lifted Metal’s body up and threw him out the window. Metal’s body, after being flung outside, floated from the wind into one of the plane’s turbine engines. The spinning blade ground his body up into a pulp of blood...and squirming metal that exuded a ghostly aura…

 

In the plane, Spongetron and SOF were crusing at each other angrily while Adrian was slowly sneaking up on Crazy Celes in the pilot’s room with a frying pan in hand…

 

*BAM*

 

She smashed the frying pan into the back of her head, but instead of knocking her out, it flattened her head into the shape of the frying pan as if she was a classic cartoon character.

 

“Ha ha!” Crazy Celes laughed, ready to gloat. “You know, for an obvious SJW protagonist, I was expecting better than weapons women used in the 50s!”

 

“Oh, don’t worry, I can do better.” Adrian responded with a smirk, confident of the damage she could do with her footwear. “I just recently got into football...”

 

Adrian then did a swift drop kick right into Celes’ face, squishing her and grinding her into a bloody mess with the cleats she was wearing.

 

“It’s no use!” Celes cried, still alive from her demon god powers. “I’m an immortal god! I can just regenerate!”

 

“Regenerate my ass!” Adrian retorted as she sat on Celes and crushed her more with her butt to stymie her regeneration process. “I’m going to stop this plane!”

 

But as Adrian got into the pilot’s seat and tried to figure out the controls, a new threat appeared outside the plane...a swarm of metal snakes crawling on the window to the left of her.

 

“Wow, this feels weirdly familiar.” Jjs remarked as he vaguely remembered something he had written in one of his shows just last year.

 

“One too many metal snakes.” Clappy’s ghost remarked as he completely remembered something he had written seven years ago. “Did you forget your password, Metal Snake?”

 

“THE GHOSTMASTER’S BACK TO GIVE US SHIT FROM EYEAR AGO THAT NO ONE CARES ABOUT OR REMEMBERS!!!” Dragiiin yelled.

 

“Now do you see what I was trying to do?!” Spongetron exclaimed. “My singing was soothing the souls of the departed, keeping them from becoming ghosts! But now it’s too late!”

 

Again, the outside of the plane was shown. With the turbine engine destroyed, the plane could no longer take the onslaught of the metal snakes, and began to go down in a tailspin. Felix had finally caught up with the plane in an airborne vehicle of his own, looking out from a helicopter to film the outside...only to see the aforementioned.

 

“D’oh…” he said in a defeated tone.

 

“Well there’s the story, folks!” SOF remarked. “Metal Snake became a Yo-Kai! Good night, everyone!”

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Episode 3: Yo Korea!

 

Crazy Celes’ plane is trapped in a tailspin!

 

“That’s no good!” Sonic the Hedgehog exclaimed as he passed by, riding on Tails, who was flying by spinning his tails in the air.

 

How will she break out of it? She eventually breaks out of it.

 

“What the hell?!” Adrian yelled as she got out of the pilot seat. “You didn’t break out of it, I did! The only thing you broke out of was being trapped underneath my ass, and that’s only because I let you!”

 

“Like that’s something to brag about?!” Celes retorted as she fully regenerated herself back to normal. “You should already let me do what I want!”

“I don’t have time for your crap!” Adrian exclaimed as the sound of the plane’s exterior being broken through could be heard coming from the passenger’s room. “I have to help the people you dragged into it!”

 

Once Adrian rushed back to the passenger’s room, she saw what she had feared when she had first seen the metal snakes come to life...the motherfucking things were now trying to bust into the goddamn plane with their razor-sharp fangs that could dig into metal. Some of them even began to chew through it, and an ominous banging came from the cargo door in the back…

 

“FUCK!” Adrian bellowed in response to the impending threat. “Everyone, grab a parachute! We have to evacuate!”

 

“Mwa ha ha, just try it!” Celes proclaimed with a cackle over the pilot’s radio. “Even with a parachute, a drop from this height will land you to a fate worse than death...landing in North Korea!”

 

Everyone on the plane besides Adrian gasped dramatically, with a few dying of shortness of breath.

 

“Alas, the shock of me implying that North Korea was a shithole country was too much for some to bear!” Crazy Celes taunted them over the radio.

 

“Not for me.” Renegade the Unicorn boasted with a cocky grin. “I agree with Donald Trump’s stance on North Korea.”

 

“Oh really?” Celes retorted in a sickly sweet tone of voice. “Then I suppose you’d also agree with me bringing...FIRE AND FURY DOWN UPON THE COUNTRY!”

 

With that, the metal snakes broke through the cargo door in the back, just as Celes went full throttle on the plane controls, directing the plane down at an alarmingly high speed. Everyone was flung out of the plane, with the exception of Spongetron, who plunged herself into the fangs of the metal snakes at the wall to keep herself inside, wanting to die where her crush had. Luckily, some of the SBC users were able to grab parachutes in time, but unfortunately, by the time everyone was ejected from the plane, Adrian didn’t have a parachute. The last thing Spongetron saw was Adrian giving her parachute to Renegade in an act of sacrifice before she got ejected herself, which led her to tear up…

 

...at the prospect of someone she didn’t like surviving, of course. To pour extra salt on the wound, she saw Adrian beginning to remove her pants, reminding her that she would now never have the chance to get laid. Her last words to Ren, her nemesis, were…

 

“I’ll stalk you till the day you die...I never let go of a grudge…”

 

And with her final vow to creep on the creeper forever, she died from the poison the metal snakes injected into her body with their fangs. Meanwhile, Felix saw what had happened from his helicopter. Immediately, he had the pilot of the helicopter fly to where Adrian was. Upon arrival, he and the team reviled at the bloody mess before them in terror…

 

“MY PARACHUTE PANTS ARE RUINED!” one of the crew members screamed as he saw an irritated Adrian floating down, hanging onto the parachute pants the crew member had technologically modified to function like an actual parachute. “WHY WAS IT SO HARD TO JUST WEAR A TAMPON?!”

 

“It was Celes’ fault, not mine!” Adrian yelled, referring to how the back of her pants got ruined when she sat on Celes while she was a bloody pulp. “Forget about me, we need to find the survivors right away and then stop Celes from doing any more damage!”

 

*KABOOM*

 

As the explosion confirmed that they were too late, Felix responded by shrugging his shoulders and saying…

 

“At least we still have survivors we can help…”

 

However, he paused as the plane flew lower to the ground, enabling him to see another bloody mess, the SBC members without parachutes who were killed from the fall.

 

“...cross over peacefully.” he finished.

 

Unfortunately, that too soon proved to be a futile pursuit, as ghosts rose from the corpses of the SBC members, becoming Yo-Kai.

 

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” Felix yelled in frustration.

 

How will North Korea handle their nation being invaded by Japanese monsters? What will be the consequences of Crazy Celes’ crazy kamikaze move? Will the Trump administration be able to make Renegade’s dream come true, and end Teen Titans Go!?

 

A (fake) preview was then shown of Renegade playing Go (Chinese/Japanese checkers) on a Teen Titans-decorated board with a Korean insei (Go student).

 

Find out next time on Total! Japan! Island!

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Episode 4: Tied Into All of This  

 

We’re back on Total Japan Island, to see what happened after the boom!

 

“WHAT. THE. FUCK. BBBBBOOOOOMMMMM!!!!! OH! OH!” could be heard from the plane Crazy Celes crashed. She was watching a compilation of dated memes on the still functional passenger TV with Sonic the Hedgehog.

 

“Lame!” she proclaimed. “This is why I never touch the memes from the 00s. I always wait until the 10s! That’s when things really start to boom!”

 

“They sure do…” Sonic said bemusedly as he remembered waiting until the 10s for Sonic Boom, only to watch it bomb terribly.

 

Um...maybe we need to go back to what happened before the boom…

 

ONE TASTELESS HISTORICAL JOKE LATER

 

Kim Jong-un was with his soldiers, shooting an infomercial inside of a weed farm.

 

north-korean-leader-kim-jong-un-farm.jpg

 

 

“Today, we show you that our Korea is not just socialist country of war!” he exclaimed. “It is fun socialist country of war!”

 

There was a pause of silence before Celes crashed the plane into the weed farm and into Kim Jong and the soldiers beside him, crushing and killing them instantly. While Celes was harmed as well, she had since regenerated from the damage done to her. The explosion that Adrian and Felix had heard happened at this time, with fire surrounding the plane and spreading to the weed, creating a familiar kind of smoke in the air. Some of the fire on the inside of the plane also began to slowly crawl towards Spongetron’s body...and she abruptly opened her eyes, now reborn as a Yo-Kai…

 

“FILM-CLI-CHES!” Celes exclaimed in tune to “DUN-DUN-DUN”. “Next thing you know, everyone is going to die with the exception of the two heroes, who will make it out entirely unscathed!”

 

Spongetron ignored the demon god’s ramblings and sucked the metal snakes who had bit her inside of her corpse, transforming herself into a robot that resembled an insect. She looked behind through one of the holes the metal snakes had made in the plane and saw her nemesis, Renegade, parachuting down to the ground with other SBC members who were fortunate enough to acquire parachutes before the plane went down.

 

“So Kim Jong-un is dead…” Ren said, viewing the scene of the plane crash before him. “Eh.”

 

“Thoughts?” Wumbo responded, curious.

 

“Eh.” Ren replied. “Happy?”

 

“such insightful thoughts” Homie remarked sarcastically.

 

“Hey, cut me some slack!” Ren exclaimed. “We’re in North Korea of all places!”

 

“Touche.” Jjs commented as Homie conceded. “We do need to watch what we say more than we normally do considering the circumstances.”

 

“would those circumstances involve me by any chance” Wumbo joked.

 

“Don’t worry, I got this.” Ren assured as he and the rest of the group landed.

 

Unfortunately, the gang landed near where a Korean soldier was patrolling. Having gotten a whiff of the smoke coming from the weed farm, he and a squad had followed it to investigate and had also now witnessed the entry of the SBC members.

 

“Who are you?!” the squad leader demanded answers from them, pointing a K2 assault rifle at them as his subordinates pointed K3 machine guns at them. “State your names and purpose!”

 

“Sup, Koreaboo?” Ren greeted them as he walked up to the squad leader, only for him to smack him in the stomach with his rifle in frustration.

 

“Arrest them all!” the squad leader ordered his men. “We’ll torture answers out of them!”

 

“What do we do?” the SBC members asked themselves as the soldiers held them at gunpoint and led them to a prison. “They’ll never believe we’re just stowaways from a Spongebob site...and if we tell them we were with that maniac who killed their leader, they’ll kill us for sure!”

 

After the squad who arrested the SBC members left, however, a new squad came to investigate the plane crash, where that maniac no longer resided. She had used her demon god powers to teleport to where Adrian and Felix were, leaving only one creature left for the squad to discover, and it wasn’t a blue hedgehog…

 

“Mwa ha ha ha ha…” Crazy Celes laughed evilly to herself. “Now it’s time to do what I do best...mess with these kids’ heads…”

 

Adrian and Felix were walking down a trail in search of Celes’ crashed plane and any survivors, with the rest of the team staying behind to watch the helicopter.

 

“Huh…” Adrian said as she found herself growing accustomed to her new clothing, having had to improvise and borrow a pair of men’s pants from a teammate after her other pants got soiled. “I guess Wayne’s World was right. At first it’s constrictive, but after a while, it becomes a part of you…”

 

“Wasn’t Garth talking about underwear in the movie though?” Felix replied.

 

“Who said I was talking about pants?” Adrian retorted. “They weren’t the only thing that got soiled, you know…”

 

“...I guess going commando wouldn’t have been much better…” an embarrassed Felix thought.

 

“Moving on from that,” said an equally abashed Adrian, “I’m surprised we haven’t run into any of Kim Jong’s commandos yet.”

 

“You think that Celes killed them?” Felix asked.

 

“If they had something to do with her show, I’m sure of it.” Adrian answered. “Celes’ only motive for doing evil things is to entertain herself, so I can easily imagine that the reason she dropped us here was because she got bored of her plan to cause a terrorist attack on the Twin Towers.”

 

“It’s even possible that she planned this all from the start.” Felix suggested. “But knowing her mental instability, it wouldn’t surprise me if there are things that she’s abruptly changing her mind on and just making up as she goes along…”

 

“Don’t look now, but I think that we’re about to see you’re right…” Adrian said as she stopped walking and held out her arm to halt her brother.

 

Both saw ahead of them something that had to be the work of the insane demon god...the South Korean animation studio that animates Spongebob Squarepants...in North Korea.

 

“I found a way to tie Spongebob into all of this!” Celes exclaimed maniacally.

 

That’s right, folks! This lit is now a spin-off! Tune in for more next week as Spongebob and Sandy finally get together while Sonic the Hedgehog watches!

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Episode 5: Celes is Sneaky

 

Welcome back, folks! It’s finally time for the epic finale, to see who will be the last one standing on Total! SOF! Island!

 

Speaking of which, where is SOF?

 

“KJ party mansion” he answered. “I’m underneath the stage curtain, but they’ll never find me!”

 

“You just told me where you were!” a Korean soldier yelled as he pulled back the stage curtain and pointed his machine gun at SOF. SOF froze before he realized he had thought of an idea in his thoughts.

 

“Look!” he yelled, pointing behind the soldier. “I see Stephen Hillenburg!”

 

In response, the bemused soldier shot him dead.  

 

“Idiot…” the soldier said to himself. “Everyone knows that Stephen Hillenburg couldn’t make it to the party today. He’s at Spongebob and Sandy’s wedding.”

 

As the soldier turned around and walked away, however, SOF’s soul emerged from his corpse. Fusing with his dead body, he became a unicorn Yo-Kai that looked like Rarity.

 

“thx for the reminder” he replied to the soldier, who looked back at SOF in shock. “i can’t miss latest premiere of truth or square done right”

 

“The fuck?!” the soldier yelled, as he fired more bullets into SOF, but they didn’t phase him. SOF charged past the soldier, gently pushing him out of the way and causing his gun to fly out of his hands and out a nearby window. Watching SOF flee the party mansion, the soldier just stared in disbelief.

 

“I can’t believe it…” he said to himself. “That is one fast Canadian. He should try out for the Olympics.”

 

“quite fitting how we’re in Soth Korea olympic era” SOF winked to the audience.  

“Yeah, pretty crazy coincidence…” the soldier winked to the audience ominously.

 

Meanwhile, Adrian and Felix had entered the geographically misplaced animation studio to investigate. There were no guards around, as if part of Crazy Celes’ intent. There were, however, many storyboard artists in the building drawing cartoon characters on computers, cartoon characters that looked familiar to the two…

 

“Is that Sandy Cheeks from Spongebob?” Felix asked himself.

 

“Is that Sonic the Hedgehog?” Adrian asked herself.

 

“What is going on here?” Felix continued asking. “If this studio really is like the studio that animates Spongebob, Sandy would obviously make sense, but what is Sonic doing here? If he’s here, where are Sega’s lawyers?”

 

“Honestly, I doubt this studio is just an imitation of the one that works on Spongebob.” Adrian suggested. “I can guarantee you, Celes would be fighting Viacom’s attorneys as we speak, they’d be here long before Sega...”

 

“Indeed, you are correct, young lady…” a familiar voice came from one of the storyboard artists who looked like Stephen Hillenburg from the back. “There is an evil going on in this studio even greater than Viacom, believe it or not…”

 

“...” Felix clutched a vial of poison in his pocket in preparation for self-defense.

 

“What evil would that be?” Adrian asked. “Are you the real crew that works on Spongebob (not that I would know, I don’t keep up with the show)?”

 

“We used to be, but now, we’ve been forced to work on a different show...” the Stephen Hillenburg lookalike explained. “...Squirrel and Hedgehog…”

 

“The North Korean war propaganda cartoon?” Felix responded as he approached the storyboard artist from the left and Adrian approached the artist from the right, neither still being able to see their face.

 

“It’s not about war anymore, as you can see…” the artist continued explaining as he showed them what was on the screen, a scene of Sandy and Spongebob as the bride and groom at a wedding. Sonic the Hedgehog was the wedding pastor and More Spongebob x Sandy was the best man. “Soon, it’s only going to be about shipping wars…”

 

“Dun...dun...dun?” Adrian made a sarcastic remark in her confusion. “I don’t get it, what’s the big problem?”

 

“I didn’t know you were such a Spandy supporter.” the artist joked.

 

“No, I just don’t care much about Spongebob anymore.” Adrian told the artist bluntly. “It was a part of my childhood that I moved on from.”

 

“You don’t care about my show anymore?” the Stephen Hillenburg lookalike asked with interest. “Why, just curious? I’m willing to take the time to listen to what you have to say and take notes for how we can improve…”

 

As the artist pulled out a pen, Felix smirked, getting an idea.

 

“I’ll take notes for you if you want.” Felix volunteered. “I’d love nothing more than to ease a burden from an artist with an illness.”

 

“Oh, why thank you, young man…” the artist replied sheepishly. “Yes, it’s hard for someone like me to manage so many tasks now that I have Alzheimer’s…”

 

“It’s ALS.” Felix politely corrected.

 

“Right!” the artist exclaimed, trying to laugh off the mistake nervously. “Sorry, my Alzheimer’s made me forget that I had ALS!”

 

Adrian gave the artist a suspicious look.

 

“You’re not really Stephen Hillenburg, are you?” she said, wisening up to the ruse.

 

“So what if I’m not?” the artist replied in an unnerving tone of voice, still keeping their face hidden. “You’re the one being interviewed…”

 

“Turn around and face me, you coward!” Adrian demanded as she turned the chair around to reveal that the artist was just Crazy Celes disguised as Stephen Hillenburg.

 

“RRRRRAAAAAHHHHH!” Celes cried as she instantly pounced on Adrian and held her down to the ground against her will. “Are you ready for your interview now?”

 

“Finally, I have you!” she gloated. “Mwa ha ha ha ha! AH HA HA HA HA...OOOOOHHHH…”

 

All of a sudden, Celes collapsed unconscious on top of Adrian, who immediately shoved her off and got up. Wondering what had caused her to suddenly faint, she examined Celes’ body and realized what happened when she saw the pen Celes had given Felix jammed into the back of her head. She then looked over to Felix, who smiled as he held out the vial of the poison.

 

“I laced that pen I used to stab her with powerful neurotoxins.” he explained. “Even with her powers, she won’t be getting up from that for a while.”

 

“Though I could’ve escaped myself…” Adrian replied as she flexed her arm muscles, trying to assure her pride. “...I very much appreciate the stress and trouble you saved me.”

 

Looking around, the two witnessed all of the other storyboard artists vanishing into black puffs of smoke along with their computers, revealing that they were all just part of an illusion.

 

“So North Korea didn’t kidnap a bunch of artists to work on bringing a shipping fantasy in an American cartoon to life after all.” Felix remarked. “Good to have one less worry, I guess. If they were real, I wouldn’t want them to end up as literal starving artists.”

 

“We still have plenty of other worries, however.” Adrian reminded him. “The most pressing one right now being that we need to catch up with the others as quickly as we can. With the precious time this shit cost us, I don’t think we’ll be able to scavenge quickly enough on foot.”

 

“The chopper would probably draw too much attention…” Felix mused. “But in worst case, we are going to have to improvise. It’s not like a better option is going to come crashing through the window.”

 

However, Felix was soon proved wrong, as the machine gun SOF had knocked out of the soldier’s hands earlier had somehow flown all the way over to the studio. It crashed through the window and landed on its butt on the floor, causing it to shoot a bullet through the roof before it fell down on its side. The Bruce siblings stared at the sight with flabbergasted expressions on their faces before Felix said…

 

“...Bursting through the front door?”

 

With that, a familiar Yo-Kai burst through the entrance to the studio, one that could travel at high speed. Adrian and Felix met the unicorn Yo-Kai…

 

...Elasticorn.

 

WHAT A TWEEST! What is SOF doing then? What happened to the SBCers who were captured? Will Kim Jong-un’s sister steal the Olympics? Find out next time on Total! SOF! Island!

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