Dreaming of Rum Ham
Danny DeVito is stranded out at sea, all alone on my crappy little boat. Just when I’m about to give up for rescue, I spot a glowing light in the distance. A magical rum ham sits in the ocean, but yet, I cannot reach it no matter how hard I try. A giant octopus then appears and swipes there rum ham out of my sights! So I chase after that son of a bitch and give the octopus a beating. Pow pow! The octopus returns my delectable meal to me, but suddenly, a hurricane sweeps through the sea now, sending us flying. Goddammit! I land on a pirate ship, crushing the pirate captain to death, so I become the captain now. We sail the seas in search of my rum ham for several years, when we come across a mysterious island. As we venture through, I am shocked to see Paddy’s Pub is on the island. We go inside, where I see my sweet rum ham waiting at a table for me. We both cry tears of joy now that we’re reunited. As I slowly begin to devour it, I unfortunately wake up.