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022b. A Root Galoot

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Lots of people have wishes, and the Star family is no exception. One day, when Patrick decides to do a gardening segment for his show, he LITERALLY unearths a Mandrake Root vegetable...that can TALK in rhyme! It even has a NAME, called Schmendrick! (I have to wonder if that's a reference to a character in "The Last Unicorn", who's also named Schmendrick?) In any case, he tells the Star Family that he will grant ONE wish to the member of the Star Family that becomes HIS favorite! So Cecil, Bunny, and GrandPat all struggle to wait on Schmendrick hand and ROOT to become his favorite! Patrick doesn't, because he doesn't know HOW to become Schmendrick's favorite, and Squidina is the ONLY one who is (reasonably) skeptical of Schmendrick's claims! GrandPat's wish, is to LITERALLY be left all alone, even if it DOOMED the rest of the planet! Cecil's wish is to be a FIVE Star Cook with a FULL four arms (which is actually POSSIBLE for sea stars, as they CAN have more than four arms!) Bunny wants to be a cleaning superhero with the power to clean up messes super fast! And Patrick just WISHES that he knew WHAT to wish for! Squidina TELLS Patrick point blank that Schmendrick is SCAMMING the other Star family members, so that they'll just pamper him; without him EVER intending to GRANT any of them a wish! Somehow, that gives Patrick the IDEA, that the best way to become Schmendrick's favorite, is to give him a TAN in a tanning booth! But Patrick LEAVES Schmendrick in there for too long, and accidentally BURNS him alive! However, given that Schmendrick had been USING them, the Star family decides it's completely FAIR for them to EAT his remains and NOT let good food go to waste. But Schmendrick's head MANAGES to come back to life before it is devoured, and Squidina plans to finish him off! In desperation, Schmendrick says he really WILL grant Squidina a wish IF she will let him live! Squidina decides to "Cut The Knot" by WISHING that Schmendrick had NEVER been found in the first place! To her surprise, her wish DOES get granted...only for Patrick to end up FINDING a Genie's Lamp instead! I guess I'd give this episode a 9.5 out of 10. Enough said, true believers!

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