Star Fox: The Lylat Wars!

[4EverGreen]

Well, predictably, I didn't win the Creation Glory topic AGAIN; but, whatever! I can't do anything about the way this episode has been formatted without also changing the way the text looks, so just bear with it for this chapter. For your reading pleasure, and what shall be my very first entry into what shall become known as the Nintendo-verse, here is the pilot episode of “Star Fox: The Lylat Wars!”

Chapter 1: Desperado

Words appear on the screen, and they are narrated by a robotic, male voice. He says: “The universe is an untamed, wild space, teeming with life, planets, asteroids, and many kinds of cosmic dangers.” The words disappear, and we see a tall, silver robot, with two purple eyes standing in the cargo room of a large spaceship. In the same voice, the robot says: “I am ROB 64, technician robot, and repair engineer, of what is perhaps the best known squadron of peacekeepers in the Lylat System. These space pilots, call themselves the Star Fox Squadron, named after the leader of the Squadron, Fox McCloud. Of course, this ride has never been a smooth and easy one. There have been many perils for them to face. Perhaps it is best if I start at the beginning, when Fox was just starting the Cornerian Academy of Flight School, where he first met his crew, and how I fit into the picture.” /

The spaceship disappears, and the viewers are taken into a vast, busy, alien city, filled with all kinds of anthropomorphic alien animals, going about their busy life. It is clearly a futuristic city, and words on the screen reads: “Planet Corneria of the Lylat System, Corneria City, 2175, three years ago.”

The action focuses on a futuristic space car, with an adult, female fox, and her teenaged son. The son says: “But mom, I don't understand WHY I have to join the Cornerian Academy of Flight School!”

And the action briefly pauses, and statistics ABOUT this fox are shown on screen! They read: “Fox McCloud. Age 18 Male, Gender Orientation, Straight. Hobbies, flying and racing anything that moves. Dislikes: Anything generally evil!”

The action resumes, and Fox's mother says: “Now, Fox, the Cornerian Academy of Flight School will be a good thing for you! Besides, you HAVE to take this school in order to get your official Pilot's license! You don't want to have to sneak around, and go to that underground training facility that I KNOW you go to when you say you're going to the Holographic Library!” Fox says: “First off, the training facility is NOT underground, it's just unaccredited! And secondly, it's not like I'm doing anything illegal!” Fox's mother says: “Regardless, I expect you to do your best at this school. Your father, James McCloud went here when he was your age. And besides, I hear that James' old team-mate, Peppy Hare, is a teacher here! You should be able to learn a lot of interesting things from him!” Fox says: “I'd rather learn a lot of interesting things from my father. It's been ten years since he disappeared. All anyone knows is that he was last heard, going to the planet Venom, in order to apprehend the evil Ape scientist Andross, and he hasn't been heard from since!” Fox's Mother says: “You think it's been tough for you? It's been tough for me, as well! A single mother, of my age and skills, has had to take on SO many various odd jobs, in order to keep your passion of learning how to fly, funded! You're LUCKY that you were considered to join this Academy, they don't take just ANY tool with an interest in flying!” Fox says: “I wish you wouldn't call them, 'Tools', they prefer to be called 'Flight Enthusiasts'. And don't get me wrong, Renarde, it's not that I'm ungrateful, far from it. It's just that, I'm not even sure I'm going to fit in there.” Fox's Mother says: “I didn't mean anything by calling them 'Tools', and why do you always have to say my name when you're mad?” Fox says: “I don't ALWAYS say your name when your mad, just often! And besides, who would even be going to this school, that I could possibly TALK to?!” And as if to answer his question, a hover motorbike goes whizzing PAST him, jolting their ride! Fox loudly asks: “Who was THAT?!!!”

The action focuses on the futuristic motorbiker, and it's revealed to be a tall, blue bird! Statistics about this bird are shown on screen! They read: “Falco Lombardi. Age 19 Male, Gender Orientation, Still Experimenting. Hobbies, being fast, being first, taking action. Dislikes: Being saved, and having to give compliments for being saved!”

Falco Lombardi shouts: “Watch where YOU'RE flying, and GET out of MY way!” In his car, Fox says: “Now I wonder where HE got his motorbike license?! Certainly not from around HERE, I should think!” The car stops in front of a very high-tech flight school, and they see Falco's motor-bike, parked not too far away! As Fox gets out of the car, Renarde says: “Don't tell me that tall punk is going to school here?! This is a respectable Academy!” Fox says: “Mom, I think I can handle this! If that guy is the WORST I have to worry about, I think I'm going to be okay!” Renarde says: “I know you will! Hugs and kisses!” Fox says: “MOM! Do I have to?” Renarde says: “A moment of embarrassment, is FAR easier to deal with, than a LIFETIME of regrets!” Fox rolls his eyes, but he groans, and says: “FINE!!!!” And he consents to his mother hugging and kissing him! Renarde says: “I'll be doing Tech Support at the Hyper Internet Facility today! I'll probably won't be back until late! There's a pre-made dinner in the fridge if you get hungry! Don't take any wooden space nickels, and when in doubt, trust your instincts! Your father always used to say that!” Fox says: “Trust your instincts, that sounds about right! All right, I'll get myself home, and I won't wait up for you! I love you!” Fox goes into the building, and Renarde yells: “I love you to, son!” And as Fox disappears out of sight, Renarde rolls up her call window, and she finishes saying: “If you only knew HOW much!” /

Fox rushes inside, and he accidentally bumps into an anthropomorphic, green, amphibian toad wearing a red hat! A bunch of hyper flash drives that the toad had been carrying fly out of his hands! Fox says: “Sorry, I didn't see you there.” The toad sounds like a surprisingly young boy, despite CLEARLY being old enough to be in the Cornerian Academy of Flight, and he says: “Don't worry about it, you're not the FIRST to bump into and/or cause damage to me without really noticing me.”

The action briefly pauses, and statistics about this amphibian are shown on screen! They read: Bullfrog “Slippy” Toad. Age 18 Male, Gender Orientation, Surprisingly Straight, Hobbies, writing, calculating, uncovering statistics, building new things. Dislikes: Being hit, being noticed in a negative way, and being made fun of, especially when it happens often.

Fox says: “You sound, strangely young! Are you even old enough for this school, Mr.; what is your name, anyways?” The toad says: “Oh, my name is Bullfrog, but everyone calls me 'Slippy', on account on how I'm always being made to slip up, and it's not even my fault most of the time. For some reason, I always seem to be the target of cruel, malicious pranks. Needless to say, my dad, Jeremiah, is very over-protective of me, and so is my mother, Belinda. You know, like the singer? But not the same woman.” Fox says: “Well, at least you still HAVE both of your parents with you! You're lucky in THAT department!” Slippy says: “First time anybody has ever called ME lucky! Uh, do you think you can help me with picking up these Hyper Flash Drives?” Fox says: “Sure, it's the least I can do for a fellow student!” Fox helps Slippy pick the Hyper Flash Drives up, and Slippy says: “You know, I'm actually the first in my family to go to the Cornerian Flight Academy, probably on account that I got Straight A's and everything. I graduated Valedictorian of my class. Of course, I got pelted with a bunch of tomatoes because of my youthful sounding voice. It's kind of weird, but my voice has always sounded this way. It's never really changed, and I doubt that it ever will. My dad, Jeremiah, his nickname was Bullfrog, and he wanted me to follow in his steps. So much for THAT dream happening! Oh, forgive me! I'm, talking too much, aren't I?” Fox says: “Oh, I don't care if you talk! I mean, if we're going to be spending time at this Academy together, it would help if we knew more about each other! You know, I bet you're not used to having friends who have your back.” Slippy says: “Not really, no.” Fox says: “Well, it's not like I'm a slouch in the academic department, but building new things is not my greatest strength. I can help you out in the social department, and you can show me how to build stuff. Does that sound like a good deal? Slippy says: “It's the best deal that I've ever gotten!” Fox says: “Then it's settled! So, I'll be your friend, at least, as long as we go to this Academy together. After that, I'm not sure WHAT'S going to happen!” Slippy says: “Well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it! Now, I got to get these Hyper Flash Drives to the Flight Instructor!” Fox says: “I'll go with you. I have to introduce myself to him, anyways!”

Fox and Slippy enter into a large, futuristic auditorium, where a lot of the other students, various anthropomorphic animal aliens of all shapes and sizes, have come to gather for Orientation Day on the first day of the Cornerian Flight Academy! They're all chattering, until a tall, brown, anthropomorphic alien rabbit steps onto the upper platform, and stands behind the podium! And in a disciplined, but friendly voice, he says: “May I have your attention, please?”

The action briefly pauses, and statistics about this instructor are shown on screen! They read: Peppy Hare. Age 42 Male, Gender Orientation, Widowed, Hobbies, Teaching, Instructing, Inspiring, and Complimenting. Dislikes: Being slow, and being reminded of a certain “Meme” that he just wants everything to FORGET already!

The Instructor says: “Welcome to your first day at the Cornerian Flight Academy School! I am your head instructor, Peppy Hare! Before we go any further, I think we all a big round of applause to our fearless leader of this planet, General Pepper, for providing the funding needed, for our Academy to proceed this year! And a bunch of the students applaud, but a familiar voice says: “He's not so special!” Fox turns around, and he says: “Oh, it's YOU again! You cut me and my mom off EARLIER!!!!” Falco is shown on-screen, and he pretends to think about it, and he says: “Sorry, I don't remember.” Fox says: “Seriously?!” Falco says: “You see, for you, getting cut off by Falco Lombardi was a significantly important moment in your day. But for me, it was a Tuesday.” Fox sarcastically laughs, and he says: “Ha, ha! That's FUNNY!” Than Fox seriously says: “I NEVER heard THAT one before! Now, why don't you do everyone here a favor, and go back to the streets where you come from!” Falco says: “That's going to be pretty difficult, seeing as how I choose a different street to make my lodgings, such as they are, every single night.” Fox asks: “So, why come here?” Falco says: “Isn't it obvious? I need to get my official Pilot's License, so I can fly away from this two-bit town, and earn some REAL money!” Fox asks: “Don't you need your parent's permission to do that FIRST?!” Falco scoffs, and he says: “As if! By the time I was ten, both of my parents were dead, leaving me alone. Although truthfully, I've always been alone. And I've never been able to relate to anybody, let alone someone like you. Speaking of, I don't even know what YOUR name even is!” Fox says: “I'm Fox McCloud, and I'm going to be the best fighter pilot in the Lylat System!” Falco says: “That's funny, it almost sounded like you said that YOU were going to be the best fighter pilot in the Lylat System, when that's what I'M going to do! And your first name is seriously FOX?!!!” Fox says: “My dad was really cool at being a fighter pilot, but lame when it came to giving me a first name. And I seriously doubt that you're going to be a fighter pilot. You don't even have the right credentials to be here!”

Falco says: “Really? Read them and weep!” And he displays a holographic display of an Approval for the Cornerian Flight Academy! Slippy takes a look at it, and he says: “Wait a minute! This is a FORGERY!!!!” Falco says: “It is NOT! How would YOU know, anyways?!” Slippy says: “Because I've got all the ORIGINAL submissions and test applications on these Hyper Flash Drives, I've looked at every single ONE of those submissions, and I know that the ORIGINAL submission that you're passing off as your own was given to Peppy, who gave them to me to review, and the ORIGINAL submission was by one promising applicant named Wolf O'Donnell! He's ALMOST as good as you are, Fox! Speaking of, I don't see Wolf O'Donnell anywhere!” Falco says: “That's because he's a little indisposed at the moment!” Fox says: “How do YOU know that?!” Falco scoffs, and says: “PFFT!!!! You can't make ME, tell YOU anything I don't WANT to!” Peppy says: “You don't have to. ROB 64!” ROB 64 walks into the scene, and the action briefly pauses, as ROB 64 narrates: “Here's where I first come into the picture. I wouldn't find out about the other details that happened between Fox and the others until later, but here's where I first brought the promising fighter pilots together for the very first time!”

The action resumes, only for it to quickly pause again, as stats about ROB 64 are displayed onscreen! They read: ROB 64. Age: Originally Manufactured 1985 A.C.E. (After Cornerian Establishment), Upgraded Modifications added 1997 A.C.E., identifies as Male, Gender Orientation, Classified, Hobbies: Scanning, Maintenance, Repairs, Identifying the Truth. Dislikes, Being blasted at, Having to be Repaired, Being Lied to.

Peppy says: “ROB 64, please scan Falco Lombardi for the truth! ROB 64 says: “Action confirmed. Scanning for truth, now!” And his eyes glow a strange purple, onto Falco's head, and after a few moments, ROB 64 says: “Truth found. Falco Lombardi engaged in a shoot-out with Wolf O'Donnell, shot one of his EYES out, stole his submission form, and altered it so that he can enter the Academy in his stead!” Peppy says: “That's a capital offense, Falco! What are you trying to pull, here?!” Falco says: “But, that's UNFAIR! You don't know what it's like living on the street! I wasn't BORN into a life of luxury like SOME of you! Slippy says: “Do you think I live a life of luxury? I have had to study numerous HOURS to get as smart as I am today!” Fox says: “And I've been researching space-ships in flight, aerial maneuvers, and flying techniques since I was only five! You can't JUST become a fighter pilot, especially NOT with an attitude like the one you have right now!” Falco says: “What's WRONG with the way I act?!” Peppy says: “You know, ordinarily, an offense like the one you pulled, Falco, is punishable by time in a hyper-cell on the Meteor Prison, for a minimum of four cycles, and maybe a flogging from General Pepper! However, I'm feeling generous today, so I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll give Falco a chance to PROVE that he belongs here! If he can pass the basic laser safety course, I'll let him stay, on probation!”

Falco says: “And THEN I get my pilot's license?” Peppy says: “Let's not get carried away. You'll be taking the course with some other new recruits. Based on your applications, I know the perfect students to pit you against. Fox McCloud, Dash Bowman, Katt Monroe, Bill Grey, Amanda Amphibian, and my personal favorite, but I guess I'm a little biased, my lovely daughter, Lucy Hare!” And a tall, female alien anthropomorphic rabbit, who looks very similar to Peppy, but younger and more feminine, walks forward.

The action briefly pauses, as stats about Lucy are displayed on screen. They read: Lucy Hare, Age 18 Female, Gender Orientation, Likes to Keep Them Guessing, Hobbies, Fashion Design (for fighter pilots), comfort, caring, and nursing for others. Dislikes: When someone good gets hurt, tacky fashion choices.

Lucy Hare says: “It's nice to know that you think of me as good enough to be with the rest of these potential pilots, but I'm really not sure if its FAIR to pit me against with qualified candidates such as them.” Peppy says: “Don't sell yourself short, Lucy. Before your mother passed away, she put me in charge of raising you, and taking care of you as best as I can. Now, since I won't be around forever, I think it's in both your best interest, and mine, if you learn how to defend yourself. You can at least give it a shot, can't you?” Lucy says: “Sure, dad. Just don't make MY test easier than the others! I don't want to be shown any favoritism. I want to succeed, or fail, based on my own merits.” Peppy says: “Lucy, you KNOW nepotism isn't allowed at this Academy. And even if it WAS, I wouldn't, because life won't ALWAYS give you easier tests! Candidates, to the Flight Simulation Room!” The chosen candidates leave the auditorium, while the other students go to other classrooms housed within the Academy. They stop at the state of the art, space-ship manufacturing and testing room! Peppy unlocks the door with a Hyper-Card, and opens it, to reveal a BUNCH of space-ship design models, mostly for one person space-ships, being built up from scratch, and seven models are hooked up and looking at a very realistic flight simulation screen. Peppy says: “This is the ultimate word in 22nd Century Technology. Scientists from all over Corneria, have worked tirelessly for the past two decades, to create and design, this brand new flight training facility. It is here, that you will first learn to fly and handle a space-ship, before you are ready to fly them. Now, these particular models, I'm very proud of! I give to you, the state of the art, Arwing!” And the candidates look over at these space-ships, and Bill Grey, a gray, anthropomorphic alien dog, says: “Wow! These are high-tech! I can't wait to pilot one of these, myself!” Katt Monroe, a pink, anthropomorphic alien cat, says: “I would admit, I would probably look absolutely stunning in one of these!” Amanda Amphibian asks: “Slippy, do you think I've got a chance to pass this test?” Slippy says: “You've got the same chance as anybody else has. But if I'm being honest, you'll probably have a better chance than me! I only help DESIGN space-ships and new technologies, I've never actually tried to FLY one, before! I'm mostly doing this to please my mom and dad, who say I need to develop some self-esteem.” Fox says: “So, THESE are Arwings! My dad actually flew a prototype of this space-ship, before he...disappeared.” Peppy says: “So, you mean YOU'RE the son of James McCloud?! I thought I recognized your name, but I wasn't sure at first! Your father was one of the best! I could tell you COUNTLESS stories of the missions we FLEW together!” Dash Bowman, a tall, anthropomorphic alien monkey, says: “If you and James McCloud flew together, than YOU must be the one who said--.”

Peppy snaps, and he says: “DON'T FINISH THAT SENTENCE! I've had at least a MILLION students who have ENDLESSLY quoted that STUPID meme of 'Do a Barrel Roll', BACK to me over the past 18 years, and I'm SICK and TIRED of hearing it! Besides, I KNOW who YOUR father is!” Dash sighs, and says: “Forgive me, Peppy. But believe me, I am NOTHING like my father. I don't agree with his methods. That's why I left him. I want to carve my own path, and not be tainted by anything he has done. That's why I changed my last name, because I want to make a fresh start here. I deserve at least that chance, don't I?” Peppy sighs, and says: “I'm sorry I snapped. You're right, of course. Let me explain how this works. This Flight Simulation Screen can simulate the environment of anywhere within the Lylat System. Now, since Corneria isn't able to defend itself, General Pepper has opened this Academy, among others, in order to train Cornerian citizens such as yourself, to help defend it, and the Lylat System at large, from any hostile threat, be it foreign, or domestic!” Fox asks: “Do you think if we're good enough, we could become our own squadron?” Peppy says: “Maybe if you're good enough, you could be. Your father and I were part of a squadron. We called ourselves the Star Fox Squadron. Your father told me he named you AFTER the Squadron we formed. Hoped one day, you would continue with his legacy and tradition.” Dash Bowman asks: “Wasn't there another member of your squadron?”

Peppy says: “If you're talking about Pigma Dengmar, we DON'T like to talk about him!” Fox asks: “Why is that?” Peppy says: “It's kind of a long story, I'll explain it to you some other time.” Falco says: “Let's get this test moving, come on!” Peppy says: “Patience, Falco. Everything needs to be explained first. Now, since you're all first-time students, more or less, we're going to start with something basic. Defend Corneria City from an enemy invasion. Your task is simple, shoot down the enemy targets, while avoiding as much collateral damage with the City as possible. You earn points for any target you shoot down, but lose points if you hit a friendly target. And YES, Falco, we CAN tell the difference, and tell WHO shot what!” And Falco snaps his feather fingers in disgust! Falco says: “Your goal is to shoot up to 150 targets for an A+, you need to shoot at least 105 to pass the class. Of course, if you manage to shoot 150 or more, you'll get something special for your troubles as well. And to get you in the mood, while you're shooting, I'll play this nice hit song by The Eagles.” Falco asks: “Were they ALL actually Eagles?!” Peppy rolls his eyes, and says: “Yes.” Falco says: “That's kind of redundant, isn't it? A bunch of eagles forming a band called The Eagles?” Fox says: “No less redundant than a band of beetles, calling themselves The Beatles.” Peppy says: “All right, it's time to get suited up, and get strapped in!” The candidates walk forward, as dramatic music plays, and they walk dramatically, in a scene lifted directly from “The Right Stuff”. They get suited up for safety, and get into their Arwings. Peppy says: “And one more thing; your Arwings all have a shield gauge. Do NOT let the shield gauge go completely empty, or else, you will experience a simulated crash, and you'll have to take the test all over again!” And Slippy GULPS in nervousness over this revelation!” Peppy says: “Hatches, close! And the futuristic cock-pit views close tight. Peppy says: “Open the wings!” The wings spread open, as if to experience flight. Peppy says: “G-Diffuser systems looking good! Everyone buckled up?!” Every single one of the candidates say: “Roger, sir!” Peppy says: “Than get ready, for three, two, one, BLASTOFF!!!!”

During the sequence, Lucy, Dash, Amanda, Katt, and Bill all have mostly routine flight experiences, but Slippy inexplicably has simulated enemy targets coming after him, but Fox keeps blasting them from behind, and even helps Falco out when his G-Diffuser system has a problem, and while everyone's doing their best to blast the require 105 targets, The Eagles hit song, “Desperado”, plays within the simulation. Don Henley sings: “Desperado, why don't you come to your senses? You been out ridin' fences, for so long now. Oh, you're a hard one, but I know that you got your reasons. These things that are pleasin' you, can hurt you somehow. Don't you draw the Queen of Diamonds, boy; she'll beat you if she's able. You know the Queen of Hearts is always your best bet. Now, it seems to me, some fine things, have been laid upon your table. But you only want the ones that you can't get. Desperado, oh, you ain't gettin' no younger. Your pain and your hunger, they're drivin' you home. And freedom, oh freedom, well that's just some people talkin'. Your prison is walking through this world all alone. Don't your feet get cold in the winter time? The sky won't snow and the sun won't shine. It's hard to tell the night time from the day. You're losin' all your highs and lows. Ain't it funny, how the feeling goes away? Desperado, why don't you come to your senses? Come down from your fences, open the gate. It may be rainin', but there's a rainbow above you. You better let somebody love you. (Let somebody love you). You better let somebody love you, before it's too late.” / And when the song ends, the simulated flight training sequence ends, as well. Peppy says: “ROB 64, tally the scores.” ROB 64 says: “Scores are tallied, sir. Everyone got a passing score.” Peppy asks: “Even Falco?” ROB 64 says: “He was second only to Fox, in terms of the number of enemies, he gunned down.” Slippy says: “Peppy, there was something 'Off', about that simulation. An excessive number of enemies seemed to be gunning for me and Falco. Now, I did diagnostics for this test last night. It wasn't supposed to do that!” Peppy says: “We'll have to make a note of that! ROB 64, scan the test for any irregularities. If there's something wrong with this system, we need to KNOW about it!” Slippy says: “So, Fox, thank you for saving my hide, there.” Fox says: “I couldn't let you fail the test without giving you the opportunity to give it everything you got. I'm sure that under normal circumstances, you could have done a GREAT job as a pilot!” Slippy says: “Well, I certainly would've done a BETTER job, that's for sure!” Falco asks: “Fox, why did you save me, after I had been so nasty to you?” Fox says: “Because, I don't believe you're REALLY as much as a bad boy that you want everyone to think you are. Now, I don't exactly know why that is just yet. Maybe it IS because you've lived on your own for the past nine years. But in any case, I just wanted to show you that not only would I play BY the rules, I could BEAT you by doing it!” Falco says: “So, a genuine display of heroics? Well-played, Fox McCloud. Well-played.”

ROB 64 says: “The test has been scanned. Someone hacked INTO the test from an unauthorized account! Unfortunately, the account must have automatically deleted itself once it hacked itself in, because I can't trace it back to the source.” Peppy says: “We'll have to tell General Pepper that we need to be more cautious, and double up our Hyper Security defenses on our Private Network.” ROB 64 asks: “Do you REALLY think it's wise to pass all of them? That Falco guy has a REAL problem with authority, you know.” Peppy says: “So did I, at one time. But Falco BLASTED 165 enemies, only 15 less than Fox! Falco gave it 110%, that's GOT to be good enough!” ROB 64 says: “Very well, then, you ARE the Instructor, let us all pray to Dog you know what you're doing.” Peppy says: “Candidates, I am glad to announce, that this is the very first time, that every single candidate who has been selected to be a part of my advanced course, has passed the test! I'm making ALL of you my flight students from this day forward!” Slippy says: “Wow! This is the first time I've EVER passed ANYTHING even SORT of physical!” Amanda says: “You know, you were actually kind of impressive the way you DODGED all those lasers!” Slippy asks: “I was?” Amanda says: “Yep! And you know, if you ever want to look me up, I'm just a lily pad away! I'll see you around, obviously, because we'll be in the same class!” Slippy blushes, and he says: “Wow! I think I might have a girlfriend!” Falco asks: “Seriously? How come HE'S the first one of us to get a girlfriend?” Fox shrugs, and he says: “Who knows? Maybe it was the universe's way of throwing the frog a bone.” Bill says: “That's NOT the way the quote goes!” Peppy says: “Oh, that reminds me. Falco, you don't really have a place to stay, don't you?” Falco says: “Not really, no.” Peppy says: “You're going to have to set up lodgings with someone. Would one of you students be willing to volunteer?” And everyone EXCEPT Katt Monroe takes a step backwards, and everyone EXCEPT Katt Monroe says: “Not IT!”

Katt Monroe groans, and she says: “FINE! He can stay at MY place! Just don't even TRY to pull any shenanigans, or I'll throw you OUT on your butt! And we BETTER get you cleaned up and dressed in some PROPER clothes! I REFUSE to let any man as dirty as YOU just waltz right into my home!” Falco says: “All right, just as long as I can take a BIRD Bath, seeing as how I am, a bird!” Peppy says: “That's strange! Fox, your MOM is calling me!” Fox says: “Don't you mean, ME?!” Peppy says: “No. The message indication distinctly says that it's for me!” Peppy turns on the voice link, and he says: “Hi, Renarde!” Renarde is at the Tech Support center, and she says: “Hi, Peppy. It's been a while, hasn't it?” Peppy says: “Far too long, Renarde.” Renarde says: “First off, I'm glad to know that you're taking on Fox as a pupil. I have a feeling that he's going to do great things in the future, but that's not the reason I'm calling. At Tech Support, I detected someone hacking into your test simulation while it was going on. While I couldn't disable the hack, I was able to trace the account before it self-terminated. The account seemed to come from one Wolf O'Donnell! Is he anyone you know?” Peppy says: “Unfortunately, it is. He was SUPPOSED to be PART of this class. But if he REALLY did hack the test, maybe it IS for the best that he's not in it.” Renarde says: “True. I just have the strangest feeling that you haven't heard the last, from him.” Peppy says: “You're probably right, Renarde. You're probably right.” /

Meanwhile, at an undisclosed location, filled with lots of black clothes, black furniture, and a black hyper-computer, a tall, gray and white furred, anthropomorphic alien wolf scowls with anger, as his body is facing towards the wall closest to him. He says: “Little, blue bird PUNK, blasting out MY eye, and now, he passed the TEST that I tried to rig AGAINST him and that SNOBBY little toad?! Who is this Fox McCloud, and who does he think he is, blasting down 180 enemy targets that should have sent the dreams of Falco and that red hat toad crashing to the ground?! Well, I'll show HIM!!!! Nobody STEALS away MY dreams and gets AWAY with it!” He picks up a black eye-patch, and puts it over his face. He faces away from the wall, and his face is finally seen, with the black eye-patch covering where his left eye USED to be!

The action pauses, and this wolf's stats are displayed on the screen! They read: Wolf O'Donnell. Age? Male, Gender Orientation, Unknown, Hobbies, Blasting ANYTHING that moves, clawing at his opponents, evasive aerial maneuvers. Dislikes: Punks, Lowlife Scum, Incompetent Space Pilots, and anyone who steals ANYTHING from him! Wolf O'Donnell says: “Mark my words, Falco Lombardi! You'll RUE the day that you crossed the path of Wolf O'Donnell! Loyal fighter pilot to Andross! I WILL find a way to defeat you someday, and take BACK the destiny that is rightfully mine!” /

Episode Notes: Official Character Debuts; Fox McCloud, Renarde McCloud, Falco Lombardi, Peppy Hare, Lucy Hare, Bullfrog “Slippy” Toad, Bill Grey, Katt Monroe, Dash Bowman, Amanda Amphibian, ROB 64, and Wolf O'Donnell. Featured Song in this Episode, “Desperado” by The Eagles, also the name of this chapter! Technology introduced: The Arwing. This begins the beginning of the Andross Saga.

Personal Notes: The reason why I'm making this, is because it really surprises me why Nintendo has not yet made an attempt to turn this into an animated series of some kind. So I took it upon myself to design a basic starter script for a pilot episode. Regardless of how well it does, I fully intend to develop this further. Naturally, this was filled with some “Mythology Gags”, as well as some “Cannon Welding”. In this series, Fox and his friends have ALWAYS known Lucy, Dash, and Amanda, rather than having to wait until they suddenly debuted in “Star Fox Command”. Also, the name of Fox's Mother, is a “Bilingual Bonus”. Her name is actually the French, Feminine version of the name for Fox. Other surprises will come along, and I hope you enjoy every single one of them. Enough said, true believers!