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Aquatic Konquest
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Posts posted by Aquatic Konquest
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(it's been basically a year since this got an update holy damn...and ironically enough this first part I've had written for about more than half of that time but never got around to uploading cuz I was originally going to do Downtown Bikini Bottom as one chapter but hey, it'll be two chapters long now so...enjoy this first part!)
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Chapter V – Downtown Bikini Bottom (Part 1)SpongeBob: Finally, I thought I’d never be able to leave that damn level.
Taxi Stop to Downtown: Congrats, you have enough spatulas to proceed.
SpongeBob: Whatever, kthx.
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French Narrator: Downtown Bikini Bottom…which for a downtown is small as fuck. I mean sure, there’s only like 500-something people in this place but what the hell is with that anyway? This ain’t a town, it’s a village. And oh, it looks like these idiots can’t even keep their tiny-ass “town” safe as it is cuz it looks like shit.
Sign: HEY SPONGEBOB PAY ATTENTION TO ME!
Mrs. Puff: AUTOMATIC DIVERSION TO A CONVERSATION WITH ME!
Sign: FUCK YOU!
Mrs. Puff: Oh, SpongeBob, just the man I wanted to see!
SpongeBob: Well, I’m more of a sponge, but…wait, are you ecstatic?
Mrs. Puff: You bet your ass I am, boy! Just look at all this destruction! It’s just…just…ohhhhhh…
SpongeBob: Um…should I come back later, or…?
Mrs. Puff: Waitwaitwait hold on…I need you to do me an errand.
SpongeBob: An errand?
Mrs. Puff: Yeah, yeah. See those weird impractical shiny things just to your right?
Steering Wheels: Coo-ee!
SpongeBob: Yeah?
Mrs. Puff: These sexy robots have been taking all of the wheels from the boats whilst rampaging and shit.
SpongeBob: Oh no, that’s terri-wait, did you just call the robots sexy?
Mrs. Puff: Shut up. Anyway, I want them.
SpongeBob: I dunno if I can do that, they tend to fade away once I tear them a new one.
Mrs. Puff: Not them, you damn fool.
SpongeBob: Okay bitch, I get it now. But what you need them for?
Mrs. Puff: Puff Mama wants herself some keepsakes.
SpongeBob: But wh-you know what, I’m not even going to dare ask that question.
Mrs. Puff: I’ll throw in a Golden Spatula if you can help me out.
SpongeBob: Okay then, I’ll help you fulfil your fetish, Puff Mama.
Mrs. Puff: Call me that again and I’ll cut you.
SpongeBob: M’kay. *prances off*
Sign: Look at the pretty shiny thing in the middle of the road.
Pretty shiny thing in the middle of the road: *exists*
SpongeBob: Hey, look, another path I can go down, byeeeeeee!
Cannon: *exists for absolutely no fucking reason…what even is this part of the level?*
SpongeBob: My thoughts exactly.
Cannon: Nyah nyah you can’t touch me! Now taste sink, bitch!
SpongeBob: BOING BOING BOING!
Cannon: Uh…
Statue: *looks on in disgust*
SpongeBob: Explosions! Button smashing! …excitement?
Anvil: *comes into existence*
Cannon: CURSE YOUUUUUUUU!
SpongeBob: Wait, that thing was being held up by a thin-ass pole, how…
Anvil: Shhh…video game logic.
Statue: Ugh, just please take this shiny thing away from me and go away already.
SpongeBob: But I don’t wanna go back to the siiiiiiiiignnnn, ugh!
Spatula Obtained – A Whole Lot of Random Shit Apparently Wins You Stuff? #1
SpongeBob: “#1”?
Konquest: Yup, there’s more down the road, I promise you.
SpongeBob: O…kay then…moving on with the plot at long last.
Sign: Thank god, so this shiny ball thing is a power up or whatever that turns you into a ball.
SpongeBob: Is it even useful?
Sign: Fuck if I know. It’s not even that cool, it’s just here cuz the devs decided to add another mechanic into the game cuz why not amirite.
SpongeBob: So you continue to be useless. But seeing that it’s the only way I’m gonna make my way through the town, I guess I have no choice. *turns into SpongeBall and does the thing*
G-Loves: *exist now*
SpongeBob: What’s that?
Sign: I could tell yo-
G-Love: CUTSCENE TIME!
Sign: OI!
G-Love #1: Robot Gloves, Robot Gloves, great for feeling up anyone…like that guy!
Random-ass fish: Say what now?
G-Love #2: Hey baby, I’d love to get all these hands over you.
G-Love #1: Maybe we can have some three-way action…
G-Loves: *slapping mode activate!*
Random-ass fish: I DID NOT CONSENT TO THIIIIIIIS!
Deus Ex-Machina: *takes the form on an anvil*
Gary: Meow. (“Oh yeah. I totally rule.”)
Random fish: RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!
G-Love: Okay, buzzkill. I’ll look for someone else.
SpongeBob: *is allowed to move again*
Hint: Haha you have to read me. Anyways, this dude will attack you from any angle. Especially from behind. I wouldn’t wanna know where those hands have been if I were you.
SpongeBob: Disgusting, but SKIP!
G-Love: Hey there sweetcakes! Park that square ass within arm’s length!
SpongeBob: Well…
G-Love: Fine. SUPER SPIN CYCLE!
SpongeBob: *bubble-bounces on this creep*
G-Love: Impossible…I’m never…the bottom…
SpongeBob: First time for everything. Moving on.
SpongeBall: Hello again.
Hot sauce: Yo.
SpongeBob: UUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH. *does the shit needed to get across*
Bubble Buddy: This is a lighthouse.
SpongeBob: I can see that.
Bubble Buddy: It is locked from the inside.
SpongeBob: I’ll take your word for it.
Bubble Buddy: …
SpongeBob: …
Bubble Buddy: …
SpongeBob: …WELL WAS THAT IT?
Bubble Buddy: …
SpongeBob: Fuckin’ useless as always, Jesus Christ… *moves on* Oh hey, a clamshell!
Clamshell: Hey hey hey! Wanna go this way instead of furthering the plot?
SpongeBob: Well I can see that I’m gonna need to turn into that annoying-as-hell ball form again to reach that part so hell yeah I do! *pays the shell*
Clamshell: *does nothing*
Barrier: *lowers*
Clamshell: Excuse me, does that not count as doing something in this universe?
Barrier: Bitch sit down.
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Establishing shot of the Sea Needle: *exists for absolutely no reason and doesn’t even have narration*
Narrator: lolz I don’t know her.
Mr. Krabs: SUDDEN APPARITION!
SpongeBob: GOD WHAT THE FUCK??? Also pretty sure you were just out of the shot as it was panning but that doesn’t explain why I had to suddenly just apparate right in front of your ugly ass and uglier-ass vocal cords.
Mr. Krabs: Shut up and just get the shiny stuff hanging outside already that’s all I’m hear for.
SpongeBob: Is that it?
Mr. Krabs: Nahhhh you totally need to smash your fucking face in when it comes to it. And make sure every tiki is destroyed so that I-er, you can have all the shiny objects you could ever want…or a least get from here.
SpongeBob: And why can’t you just do it considering you seem to love these things more than me. You send that note and everything.
Mr. Krabs: My ass ain’t what it used to be, lad…unless…you wanna see me try…?
SpongeBob: Ugh, no…no no no…no. I’ll do it… *does the things*
Mr. Krabs: Lovely work, boy! Have this as a reward!
Golden Spatula Obtained: Hope It Was Worth Smashing Your Face In
Mr. Krabs: Cool, now hand ‘em over!
SpongeBob: Umm W.T.F. no. And this is the wrong level for that kinda transaction.
Mr. Krabs: So…I sent you out to do some labor and I get nothing in return?
SpongeBob: Welcome to the life of an NPC, bitch!
Mr. Krabs: DAMN YOU!
SpongeBob: *leaves promptly*
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(In the next part, Sandy and her wonderful arsenal of abilities will make their debut! Will our porous dumbass share the limelight with dignity?)
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Gemstones are definitely a pretty sight...any one in particular that catches your eye the most?
For me it's gotta be between diamonds and rubies. Also, the bigger the gem, the nicer the jewelery imo. Would love to get me a nice ruby ring.IDK I'm watching The Case Files of Jeweler Richard and the animation of the gems is absolutely gorgeous... -
My Christmas list is mostly just BL manga, mostly volumes of Hitorijime My Hero and Candy Color Paradox. Although considering I keep buying whatever BL manga I can get my hands on even now it's so tempting to get them now. Otherwise it's just some Little Mermaid t-shirts, an Ursula sleep mask and a Zombie Bart POP Figure I really would like.
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It's a SpongeBob Christmas was an instant favorite and will always hold a special place in my heart as far as this show is concerned
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Oooooooh it was a fight between Don't Be a Jerk and Santa Has His Eye on Me but the latter I find just a bit better.
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Well, seeing as the movie was released on Netflix today and I wanted something to distract myself from my uni work in my head I ended up watching Sponge on the Run today and well...for what it is, I liked it quite a lot.
Quite frankly, I'd be lying if I said that the story wasn't lackluster - perhaps since I'm not really interested in corny-ass kids' flicks that emphasis "The Power of Friendship" all the bloomin' time but the movie had genuine moments where I did laugh quite a bit. The movie can be genuinely funny.
And the visuals! Oh, the beautiful, beautiful visuals! I just want to gush about the animation in this thing for ages because LORRRRRRD I love it so, so, so much. I would recommend this movie based on visuals alone quite frankly. It's so interesting to look at alone. Odd thing is there were definitely moments where looking at it I'd swear it looks like stop motion, and some of the fish look like they come from a SpongeBob Robot Chicken sketch. Not to say anything negative by that at all, because the movements of all the characters is so enjoyable to watch. And the COLOURS! EEEEEE!!!!
SpoilerIn terms of more specific things though...
I do not care for the live-action "dream sequence" at all. Nope. Nada. Cut it all out. Unlike the previous movies, which incorporate the live-action segments into the storytelling, this one just...exists, seemingly just to be in line with those other movies. And while those movies also had their fair share of outlandishness they were still ultimately relevant to the story, whereas here I didn't really see the point and was tempted to skip the entire thing because oof...the moment the dance sequence began I could've sworn I was thrown into watching a music video instead. While I understand it's supposed to be outlandish and exaggerated in nature it just didn't mesh right with me and threw me out of the experience of watching the movie.
Also do not care for Keanu Reeve's Sage character, either. Especially since he was more prominent in the movie than I'd assumed he was from the trailers. Can't say I hate him since he wasn't really that major a character but...yeah, he could be cut too and not much would be lost, in my opinion.
The Kamp Koral flashbacks were...fine, I guess? They were definitely hamfisted in there and even without the fact that the spin-off surrounding it exists it still comes off as padding to me. I like the pay-off it has in the third act, though, when everybody talks about how much SpongeBob means to them.
The music usage in this film...was somewhat worthy of an eyeroll, or at least where the use of pop songs that already exist is concerned. I mean SpongeBob and Patrick singing pieces of Livin la Vida Loca whilst enjoying the city? Maybe Shrek 2's use of it and the popularity that particular instance garnered is at fault here but I just kinda like "whut the hell...?" I will say, Take on Me for the ending? YES. Also love the cover for it here, it was just perfect to me.
Also love that it seems that the movie has its fair share of references to the show. The Chum Bucket in particular was where I noticed a lot. Might be other places I didn't quite catch though.
Otherwise...I liked everything else. The plot was nice. Definitely feels like the movie retreads a lot of what the show's already done here but it's still enjoyable.
Also SpongeBob says "crappy" in this movie and I enjoyed it a lot so points for that.
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Ooh, Boo-Kini Bottom for sure.
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Been on an anime binge since September, and have found myself in the wonderful world of BL/Yaoi anime and damn is there a lot of manga I ought to read. Given, Haikyuu, Free! and Junjou Romantica have been my favorite ones so far
two of them are not BL I know but one of those two is definitely giving off BL vibes. -
I find myself personally torn between the 50's and the 90's, both due to the Disney films that came out in each respective era. (The Little Mermaid I am actually including as part of the 90's considering its launch of the Renaissance era had notable impact throughout the decade and its release being so close to the end of the 80's made it a film that 90's kids would enjoy)
Outside of movies, I guess I would be swayed to go with the 2000's since a lot of TV shows I've enjoyed and do enjoy currently come from that era.
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Started playing the game again the other day and I'm disappointed there's no screen size adjustment setting after the new patch was added, but maybe it's just a problem only I seem to be having where the bottom edge is just obscured. It's not a huge deal but it does obscure whatever commands are placed there so it's hard to see what the hell is going on on the screen. Game's still as cute and fun as always regardless.
And also tried the horde/multiplayer mode too. Despite my internet working I couldn't do it online so I just used my spare controller to play locally and...it sucks? The whole Robo-Squidward stage feels half-arsed as if it was just hastily put together in order to provide something different and "new" or whatever. Also kinda insulting they have platforms designed after Patrick's scrapped dream level. I mean, I dunno, I suppose it's a cute reference but considering they're platforms with actual textures and stuff it only further begs the question as to why we didn't get the dream level originally intended especially considering they probably had access the the audio files needed for dialogue.
Weird thing is, the Robo-Squidward battle feels like a boss battle that could have been implemented into the game, albeit requiring new cutscenes, dialogue, etc. Just set the fight in Tentacle Acres or the Boating School or something and adjust the battle itself to fit the location and it'd be a pretty cool implementation.
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Daffy Duck forever and always. His TLTS incarnation is my utmost favorite portrayal of him.
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Airplanes - B.O.B. ft. Hayley Williams
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Celebrity Juice (which I guess counts?) and Through the Keyhole. Absolutely looooove Keith Lemon.
Ooh, and also The Chase.
I'm aware of Supermarket Sweep and that's pretty cool; I do like the concept.
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PS4 all the way. Way better game selection on that thing. Don't have an XBOX One and Nintendo just continues to underwhelm me.
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So...judging by the soundbyte at the end I guess they didn't opt to have Clancy Brown record Mr. Krabs' lines for the remaster? That's...kind of a bummer, to be honest, but I'm not surprised. I suppose for nostalgic purposes leaving it intact is also more effective I guess to preserve as much of the original game in this remaster as possible.
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Over a month since I've bothered to update this, but I've been busy during that time and this is the result...
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Super spin cycle!
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Jump!
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CHARRRRRGE!
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Last Ferry
I do love me a good mystery thriller-type movie. And that ending...I wasn't expecting it to end as abruptly as it did but damn.
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Battle for Bikini Bottom is too easy and bias a pick for me, so I'm going with Yellow Avenger (specifically the PSP version cuz the DS version while virtually the same just isn't as fun when everything's split between two screens). Like BFBB I have a lot of fun memories with Yellow Avenger as a kid and it used to be the one game I'd play all the time on my PSP alongside LittleBigPlanet. If I can find it around the house (or if it's the one game jammed in my uncharged PSP right now) I'll have to get back into it.
Also the console versions of all the Nicktoons Unite games as well as RotFD, CftKK, the Movie Game and Truth or Square are awesome as well.
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3 hours ago, Steel Sponge said:
As I said before, Tom Kenny is not just SpongeBob's voice, he is THE voice of the character. Outside of foreign material, of course, I could not recount a moment in my life where Tom didn't voice SpongeBob for any official piece of SB material (and if I'm wrong, let me know).
Guess I get to remind y'all that this atrocity exists.
And this is official merchandise from the early 2010's! OFFICIAL MERCHANISE!
But I totally bought it when I was 11 and totally still have it and listen to it hahaBut in all seriousness, I don't think it's completely out of the question. But of course, even if they did find a great replacement, the character isn't theirs, you know? Tom Kenny is definitely what makes SpongeBob SpongeBob. He is his character.
Like I would think that god forbid something happens to Tom Kenny, a replacement should most definitely be considered. SpongeBob could never be a silent character; his iconic laugh could be archive stuff but that'd be kinda cheap, idk.Otherwise, Nick will just probably come up with a spin-off with a concept that could feasibly allow SpongeBob to have an entirely different voice just for the sake of milking the franchise of all its worth for years to come.
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2 hours ago, Inanimate Carbon Rod said:
Ever checked out Welcome to Pooh Corner?
I have not, no. I've just looked up some screenshots and um...it looks kinda wild? Those costumes are lowkey disturbing lel
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Salmon's Art Reef
in Squidward's Art Show
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Oooooooh these are so good; I especially love the sad widdle padlock one, it's so cute! Nice to see you posting after so long, man! Keep up the good work!