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OWM

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Posts posted by OWM

    The SBC is adamant about saying NO to Kamp Koral. Why/Surprised?

    in Bikini Bottom

    Posted

    Numerous insider leads and private investigations have given me a wealth of information about a one SpongeBob SquarePants Junior, who was BORN as “Savanna”

    B7E9615D-BCFA-4472-91F2-ACA662D5AB31.png.222e7ccfd88fdaf943f5537119b49d94.png

    As we can see here they were assigned female at birth but the circumstances that surrounded the Great Ethnic Cleansing (GEC) forced them to disguise the child entirely. The couple separated and SpongeBob took Savanna and raised them as ‘’SpongeBob Jr” who was said to be conceived by reproduction by budding.

     

    DESPITE THIS FINDING I was unable to find info about Squidward Jr, the supposed second child of SpongeBob and Squidward. Could it be that SpongeBob held no part in the raising of this child, be it genetic or parental?

    C053A950-6740-4761-B4FB-3BCC6D33B9C3.thumb.jpeg.b6099b84334957a6f1fb0655a34e9c82.jpeg

    I propose that SpongeBob Sr had an affair with Patrick Sr, creating this monstrosity. You see the facial resemblance? We can assume that Squidward Jr was somehow adopted or asexually conceived by Squidward and the sponge-like gayness is purely coincidental

    • Thanks 1
    • God Himself 5

    Carl from Gary and Patrick's family tree

    in SpongeBob Characters

    Posted

    It seems Carl's choice to rename Carl's Pizza Denver "Pizza Castle" shows an ironic callback to his royal title, and how he'd been unceremoniously stripped of it due to the circumstances of his birth. He often wished normal parents had adopted him and not a weird dolphin thing and fat green guy from two separate royal families out of wedlock. They did their best to give him a good home, but it wasn't enough to remedy the rejection he felt from the undersea upper-class and unwanted attention from the tabloids.

    His business boomed, but he never quite found happiness. He always felt like he was made for better things than selling large double olive pizzas to fatties as a coverup for the nationwide drug enterprise he ran behind the scenes. Maybe it was never meant to be for poor old Carl.

     

    • Sad 2
    • Hug 1

    SpongeBob and Patrick took apart of a Global wide Massacre

    in Bikini Bottom

    Posted

    The pirates’ victory plaque clearly describes the robots as a “menace” as if they were a recent threat to their safety that needed to be dealt with through such a bloody and terrible war. Could it be that “Pirate Island” fell under threat from robot imperialism? Or perhaps robots and pirates coexisted until war profiteers like SpongeBob and Patrick arrived to turn these two groups’ differences against each other? 

     

    We can point to the start of the war being Patrick’s comments of “beep beep beep” with responses of “For that, you’ll walk the plank!” We could infer that the robots must have started something so heinous that it drove the pirates to commit mass genocide, but it’s clear that SpongeBob and Patrick instigated this incident themselves. Those monsters took advantage of this island for their own personal benefit, and they must be stopped.

    • Like 2
    • God Himself 1

    The Seed That Soaked up SpongeBob’s Nose Dripping

    in SpongeBob Characters

    Posted

    The pineapple seed—like all fruits-to-be—was a living being, yet I don't think it ever found true happiness. I imagine it was left to chase the high of being cummed on with icky sponge boogers for the rest of its lifespan, waiting patiently for episodes that could give it prominence again. 

    448753402125aPineapp.jpg

    And so it received another one years later, but this where I mark the start of the pineapple seed's crashing decline. The abuse it suffered under these three strange gay men would only worsen its painful identity crisis. Why are they mistreating me so? Are canned fruit homes the new norm? Do I need to spend the rest of its life competing with synthetically grown Ananas comosus? Never again would it feel the caress of living, rushing life through its roots—and it knew.

    514004285170bHomeSwe.jpg

    It was just too much. It accepted its fate and chose to burn out rather than fade away, defying the future of false fruits wrapped in tin containers. But was it even worth it?

     

     

    • Sad 3
    • God Himself 1

    Stick, Rock and Sink Buddy

    in SpongeBob Characters

    Posted

    After SpongeBob coldly passed these three by, Stick, Rock, and Sink Buddy felt unwanted and directionless in life. They tried looking for work together as a group but the market just doesn't call for a trio of inanimates like this. As far as I know Rock Buddy left to join her brothers and sisters at the Bikini Bottom quarry. But Sink and Stick Buddy? God save them, wherever they are now.

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