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Joe Biden

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Posts posted by Joe Biden

    Alex Trebek dies after cancer battle at age 80

    in Robot-Pirate Island

    Posted

    This is legit one of those deaths that has actively made me upset. I felt impatient when I heard the news from a customer during work, felt sad when I read that it actually happened, got too choked up to watch the rest of Jeopardy last night, and lost two nights of sleep just thinking about it. Alex Trebek was such an iconic voice in this world even outside of Jeopardy. The fact that the world sucks now may be sad but the fact that it's now a world without Alex Trebek is even sadder.

     

    Rest in peace, Alex. Thank you for giving us 36 years of entertainment.

    Sponge on the Run Official Discussion

    in SpongeBob Universe

    Posted

    I actually did make a review for this movie on Letterboxd after I watched it. Now keep in mind, I did have a lot to say about this movie:

    Spoiler

    YOU MOTHERUCKERS! IF YOU HAD WORN YOUR MASKS AND TAKEN THIS COVID SHIT SERIOUSLY WE WOULD BE SEEING THE SEXINESS OF SPONGEBOB AND TUMBLEWEED KEANU ON THE BIG SCREEN! BUT NOOOO! YOU DUMBASSES DECIDED TO BE IGNORANT FUCKS AND NOW THAT SMUG BITCH CANADA GETS TO SEE THIS IN THEATERS! DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITED I WAS TO SEE A MOVIE I COULD JERK OFF TO IN THEATERS? SEEING CGI SPONGEBOB ON THE BIG SCREEN WOULD HAVE RELEASED A WAVE OF WET AND WHITE GOODNESS ON A SCALE NO ONE HAS SEEN BEFORE, BUT YOU DICKHEADS FUCKED US ALL OVER! I FUCKING HATE YOU ALL!

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Okay, that wasn't my actual review. You'll have to click on the next spoiler for that.

    Spoiler

    You'd think in the time of misery us Americans are in right now, this optimistic yellow sponge would bring in some positivity. Unfortunately, this movie felt more generic than it was positive. It's not that it's horrible, it's that it doesn't even try to be its own thing like the two other movies were. The first SpongeBob movie was a true classic. The second one wasn't better but at least I can see the appeal to it. This movie right here feels nothing more than a boring 80 minute advertisement of the upcoming SpongeBob spin-off, Kamp Koral.

     

    "Uninspired" is probably the best word to describe this movie. Whatever's been done in this movie was done better in other SpongeBob movies and episodes. SpongeBob and Patrick going on a road trip to save something that's been stolen by a villain? Sounds like the first movie to me. A famous celebrity coming to SpongeBob and Patrick's aid? Sounds like the first movie to me. The plot around Gary going missing? That was already done before in "Have You Seen This Snail" and done much better there than here.

     

    What about the jokes? The main source of animated comedies themselves? I may not expect any clever writing us 20-something year old shitposters loved from the first movie, but I was expecting to find some amusing jokes here and there. Instead, most of it came from the show's usual schtick (Squidward hates his neighbors, Mr. Krabs likes money, Patrick is dumb, stuff the show has made entirely clear through the whole series) and a lot of those jokes just fell flat on their faces. And believe it or not, those weren't the only worst jokes of the movie. I'll explain in the next paragraph.

     

    Pop culture references. I'd expect to see them in some live-action/animated franchise movies like "Alvin & the Chipmunks" (which was also directed by Tim Hill) or "The Smurfs". Never in my life did SpongeBob imply that Skype and Facetime (yes, those were both name-dropped in the movie) existed in-universe until now. Not only that but the movie seemed to utilize non-original songs like "Slow Ride" and "Livin' la Vida Loca". Knowing all this sadly makes the Alvin/Smurfs comparisons truer. But hey, it could've been worse. They could've shoehorned in a joke about Patrick misunderstanding the game "Rock Band".

     

    Although shockingly how this was the least of the problems I've had with this movie, it simply wouldn't be a negative review without acknowledging the continuity errors this movie and its future spin-off made. It implies that SpongeBob was already friends with Sandy before "Tea at the Treedome" and that Mr. Krabs and Plankton met before "Friend or Foe" (which was an episode director/writer Tim Hill actually wrote). Though the series itself was never really one to obey continuity so I'll give it a pass for now.

     

    But you know what is the most disappointing thing about this movie? It could've had a chance to be tolerable. It wouldn't be mindblowing or anything but it certainly could've been a stand-out when it came to Tim Hill's other films like "Alvin", "Hop", and "Grumpy Cat's Worst Christmas". I had a small spot of hope considering he wrote this too and previously wrote for episodes of Rocko, SpongeBob, and the first SpongeBob movie. Clearly lightning didn't strike twice. The final draft felt rushed and the pacing of the film went by too fast, I felt completely lost by the end of it. At least the first two had some kind of buildup to the plot and made more sense than this.

     

    I'm not gonna act like the movie was totally irredeemable though. Here are some highlights:
    - The animation actually looks nice. Kudos to the studio and the animators behind it.
    - The Hans Zimmer score in the movie is great.
    - It was nice that they dedicated the movie to Stephen Hillenburg in the credits. They may not have respected the creator's wishes but at least they're still respecting the creator.
    - Snoop Dogg. He could literally be in any bad movie and still be the best part of that movie. He's up there with Will Smith in terms of likability where you just can't hate him no matter how embarrassing his role is.

     

    But that's all I'm gonna give this movie credit for. Overall, it's a giant mess and not a particularly great mess either. There will probably be some kids out there who will enjoy it but I certainly expect more from a SpongeBob movie than bright lights and celebrity cameos.

     

    EDIT: Oh yeah, one thing I forgot to mention in my review, THEY USED WEEZER'S COVER OF TAKE ON ME?! THOSE FUCKING FUCK FUCKERS USED A LAZY ASS COVER OF ONE OF THE BEST '80S SONGS IN THIS EXCUSE OF A MOVIE?! FUCK THIS MOVIE AND FUCK YOU TOO, WEEZER.

     

     

    Trump Vs. The World?: The 2020 Election Thread

    in Robot-Pirate Island

    Posted

    https://abcnews.go.com/US/president-trump-lady-test-positive-covid-19/story?id=73380448

     

    What a strange turn of events this month is taking already. Almost 1 month before the election (my first election too) and we might have our first president to die in office since John Fucking Kennedy in 1963.

     

    Trump is 74 years old, conveniently the same age Herman Cain was when he contracted COVID and died from it one month after his diagnosis, so he's most likely not exempt from facing the same fate he did. On the other hand, he probably has a lot of health professionals who'll come to both his and Melania's aid so his chances of surviving are not out of the question either.

     

    If he does recover from the symptoms, I really hope this moment gives him a Wonderful Life-like revelation and actually encourage safe distancing, now that he finally knows what it's like to be as mortal as everyone else. But most likely, he'll brag on Twitter about how he defeated the little Chinese man that lived inside his body.

    • Like 2

    How are you feeling? (Emotionally)

    in Robot-Pirate Island

    Posted

    Feeling disappointed in myself. Got an evaluation at work that went well, but I got points docked because the person running it thought I wasn't smiling or providing any carryout service, even thought I was doing both things and no one at all can tell under a fucking mask. Grocery stores, man...

     

    Beyond that though, life has been boring so far. I'm single, don't have a car, can't get my license 6 months after my last seizure, and I'm living in a conservative household. Life sucks, dammit.

    What Was The Best Decade For Animation?

    in Culture Shock

    Posted

    This is probably the hardest poll I've ever had to answer, because while I could easily answer the music poll with "the '80s", it's hard for me to decipher which decade is easily the best of them all. I do like the '90s for being a step up from the rather mixed bag that was the '80s. This could be my inner 2000s kid talking but I slightly prefer the 2000s more. Mostly because I watched that network during its boom after "Ed Edd n Eddy" aired and the rest of the early-to-mid 2000s cartoons on there that followed I also liked. Not to mention "Fairly Oddparents" and "Jimmy Neutron" on Nick too. The '90s may have been a renaissance when it came to animation but the 2000s is what I connect with more.

    Of course, I do give credit to the first half of the 2010s too for cartoons like Adventure Time, Regular Show, and Gravity Falls, just to name a few. Lost interest somewhere after 2016 when the network schedules started leaning towards one or two programs and started reviving their old properties that led to mixed-to-bad results.

    But yeah, nostalgia bias be damned, I still love the hell out of the 2000s. It was a great bridge from the influential era of the '90s to a much different landscape in the 2010s.

    Demented Music

    in Songs

    Posted

    Spoken: "Can -- can I put in somethin' like ... this is 'Demented
    Music', take one.... 1, 2, 3, 4!"
    Do you like Demented music? I like Demented music
    Don't you like Demented music, baaaabyyyy

    I like, songs about a Surfin' Bird, Star Trek, and Harry Potter,
    That is the spirit of dementia, baaaabyyyy
    I like songs about insanity, cartoons, SciFi and Tee-vee,
    I like Demented music, yea, baaaabyyyy

    Your songs are too slow, My songs are just right,
    I'll say I love dementia with all my might,

    It's good enough for meeee, It's good enough for youuuu.
    G {or A-G-A-G-A-G on the G-string to follow the vocal}
    Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

    I like songs about computers, South Park, food, cars, and moose turds,
    Won't you, listen to dementia, wi-ith me, baaaabyyyy
    I like songs about a fish head, Hobbits, and animals that are dead,
    Demented music is my forte, baaaabyyyy

    Top 40's a bore, It does nothing for me,
    It just doesn't have the flavor of crazy comedy, That's good enough for meeee,

    (d'you like Demented music)
    If it's good enough for meeee,
    (d'you like Demented music)
    It's good enough for youuuuu.
    Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

    A cappella :
    D'you like Demented music? (We like Demented music)
    I like Demented music (Baaaabyyyyy)
    D'you like Demented music (We like all kinds of music)
    But I like Demented music best (Baaaabyyyy)

    It's the greatest music in the whole wide world,
    I wish that I can share it with a lovely girl.

    It's good enough for meeee (do you like Demented Music)
    It's good enough for meeee (I can hear the music)
    It's good enough for meeee (fun-ny music)
    {C-F repeats, getting more frenetic, and finish}

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