Renegade the Maniacorn

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Renegade the Maniacorn last won the day on July 19

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About Renegade the Maniacorn

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    for the toilet next time! I had to clean off your pee! D:<
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    What you're reading right now.
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    ...Isn't that like the ER?
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    jaw gets no respect.
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    is total crap.

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  • Location
    The Punchbowl
  • Favorite Episode
    Tea at the Treedome
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  1. Ask Metal Snake

    Why is this so humorous?
  2. hello

  3. Fairy World?

    better than the beatles?:
  4. Power Rangers: Multiverse Force

    Amazoness' Last Stand It was a peaceful evening in Coastal Falls, and the Rangers were in Ebony's living room, chowing down on a batch of Cauldron Cakes she'd made. "You know what these remind me of?" Lettuce said. "The molten lava cupcakes my dad whips up." "Oh, yeah, those." Toby said. "I remember when you brought me a couple. Those were sooo good." Naruto had polishd off his first Cauldron Cake and was grabbing another, much to Toby's amusement. "Hey, man. Slow down." he said, trying not to laugh. Naruto shot him a glare, but couldn't resist laughing himself. Soon the laughter spread to everyone in the room, from Blackhawk to Usagi. When the laughter died down, Blackhawk took a bite of his cake, and looked at Ebony. "This is great." he said. "How'd you make these?" "Family recipe on my dad's side." Ebony said. "It's been in our family since about the 1500s, I think." "Cool!" said Usagi. "Your family must have a lot of great recipes if these taste as excellent as they do." "We have lots, actually." Ebony explained. "Volumes of them, some ranging all the way to medieval times." "Ooh, I have an idea!" Pinkie squeaked, a bit of green goo dribbling down her chin, which Lettuce wiped away then ate himself. "Why don't you teach us how to make Cauldron Cakes? I think that'd be a really neat recipe!" "I second that, Ebony. Since I'm the son of a chef and I really love cooking, I always enjoy learning a new recipe or two." Lettuce said. "Me three. I wanna cook up something better than Poffin Pies." Toby said. "And I wanna cook up something better than ramen." Naruto joked. "If you ask me," chimed in Blackhawk. "this could be a good way for us to grow as a team." "That isn't a bad idea." Ebony agreed. "Hold on, I'll get one of my family's cookbooks from the attic." Walking over to the attic door, Ebony pulled it down with her magic, the ladder sliding down and hitting the floor. Slowly climbing up and out of sight, Ebony retrieved the cookbook and soon returned. Upon closer inspection, the other Rangers saw it resembled less of a modern cookbook and moe of a medieval appropriate, considering Ebony's lineage. The spine creaked as the front cover was flipped open, revealing the pages were yellowed with age, with text resembling Early Modern English, the kind Shakespeare used. "Okay...let's see here...butterbeer...pumpkin we go, cauldron cakes." Gesturing that they should move into the kitchen, Ebony exited the living room with the other Rangers following. Placing the cookbook on the counter, Ebony got out the ingredients for the batter: cocoa powder, butter, eggs, milk, flour and sugar. "Wait..." Lettuce said. "If this recipe's been in your family for centuries, then how come it uses cocoa powder?" "You're forgetting something, Lettuce." Ebony replied. "By the time my ancestors started making Cauldron Cakes, chocolate had been introduced in Europe for a while." "Still doesn't explain that bubbly green filling." Lettuce said. "Boiling and green coloring." Ebony explained, starting to make the batter. "Oh, now that makes sense." Lettuce said as Blackhawk began heating a flame to make the cake filling. Meanwhile, on the Diabolic, Queen Hedrian and Emperor Diabolica had been cuddling and busy putting the final touches on their wedding plans, since it was to occur in around two days from now. They had decided most of everything up to this point: what they were going to wear (Hedrian had decided she'd wear a black dress, and Diabolica would wear black armor), who they'd invite (Hedrian would invite her father Master Vile and brother Rito Revolto, since as far as she was concerned they were the only members of her family worth a crap; Diabolica's minions were, by his own admission, the only family he had left, so they had honorary invites), and how big the wedding was going to be (pretty small, in contrast to Rita and Zedd's; Diabolica had compared their wedding to a Ork Waaaaagh! upon hearing a description from Rito Revolto, who had heard secondhand descriptions from guests and completely agreed). Now all that was left was very minor things such as the cake, which Circe was mixing up in one of her non-potion cauldrons. "Hey!" she protested as Kraky dipped his finger in the batter and tasted it. "What are you doing?!" "I'm helping you, stupid." Kraky replied irritably. "Needs more vanilla extract." Emperor Diabolica shot lasers out of his eyes, which promptly hit Kraky in the rear. As the kraken-like creature was screaming Yosemite Sam-style about how his 'biscuits were burning', the Tauran emperor growled, "Do not bother Circe while she helps us finish our wedding plans, especially eating the wedding cake batter. Do I make myself clear?" "Y-yes, sire." Kraky whimpered, still holding his buttocks in pain. "I'm sorry for messing things up, Circe. I was only trying to help." "Now," ordered Emperor Diabolica. "go find something to do that doesn't involve us in any way, shape, or form." "Yes, sire." Kraky said, then went off to do who-knows-what. Stopping her cuddling of her fiancee for a moment, Hedrian breathed a sigh of relief as a thought struck her. "Speaking of minions, where is Amazoness?" she inquired. As soon as the last syllable rolled off her tongue, who should show up but Amazoness, looking as pleased as could be? "Speak of the devil..."Hedrian muttered, then cleared her throat. "Hello, Amazoness. Have you made progress on your Megazord, by any chance?" "Actually, yes." Amazoness replied. "The Amazord, as I call it, is ready for action and I am about to take it for a...test run, as it were." "Then why aren't you out there doing so?" Hedrian asked before being interrupted by Lightning Galaxy, who slowly approached her, pistol in hand. "Yes, Lighning Galaxy? What do you want?" "I am just here to inform you that I will be accompanying Amazoness on her mission to destroy the Rangers." Hedrian raised an eyebrow and asked, "You aren't going to bring one of my monsters with you just in case?" Lightning Galaxy simply unholstered one of her pistols, which resembled a dull grey Colt 1911, and retrieved a small handful of silver-colored pellets (about 10 in total), each of which identically resembled a birdshot shell. Unloading a magazine cartridge, Lightning Galaxy began loading the pellets in one by one then inserted the magazine into her pistol. Wielding the gun with a stoic expression, Lightning Galaxy aimed it at the egg hatchery and fired. Instantaneously, a bright flash of light erupted from the barrel and hit the machine dead center, setting it aflame and causing a medium-sized explosion which destroyed most, if not all, of the remaining Hedrian Eggs inside. Her point made, Lightning Galaxy turned to face Hedrian, her mouth still afixed in an unmoving line. "Does that answer your question, Hedrian? I have said it before, and I wil say it again: I need none of your pathetic monsters to take on the Rangers." she said smugly, Hedrian's face contorting into what could be best described as a mix of sorrow and maternal rage. As the Hedrian Clan's queen rose her hands to strangle the helmeted criminal, the latter once again raised the pistol, with it this time pointed straight at Hedrian. "I wouldn't lay a hand on me if I were you, dear. You have seen what one of my laser pellets can do against machinery. Would you like a demonstration of how it would feel against your bare skin?" Hedrian's eyes widened in horror, and she slowly backed away, mentally noting that she would find a way to avenge her remaining monsters...somehow. Smirking, Lightning Galaxy reholstered her pistol, then looked at the still-cowering Hedrian. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a team of Power Rangers to defeat." And with that, she teleported away as Hedrian began gathering materials to create memorial busts for the last Hedrian Monsters. Back on Core Earth, the Rangers were still busy making Cauldron Cakes when the familiar beeping of the Power Watches resounded. "Looks like duty calls." Blackhawk said. Naruto opened communications and spoke, "Trouble as usual, Omnus and Alpha?" "Precisely." replied Omnus. "But this is no ordinary Bloodbeast or Hedrian Monster. You are anout to face Lightning Galaxy, one of the most deadly assassins in the multiverse. You will need to use your cunning and fighting skills to the maximum amount if you are to defeat her. Good luck, Power Rangers." Naruto shut off the watch's communicator and got up. "All right guys, you know what to do next." "Right." the other Rangers said. "IT'S MORPHING TIME!" "SPINOSAURUS!" "VELOCIRAPTOR!" "ANKYLOSAURUS!" "STEGOSAURUS!" "TRICERATOPS!" "HADROSAURUS!" "TYRANNOSAURUS!" Teleporting into the city, the team performed their usual pose, and were about to announce their arrival, "POWER RANG-", but were suddenly interrupted by a blast from one of Lightning Galaxy's pistols, causing a huge explosion and knocking the team out of position. "Ugh..." what happened...?" Toby groaned, slowly getting up and dusting himself off. "I'm not-wait, look!" replied Lettuce, pointing to where Lightning Galaxy stood, her pistol's barrel smoking. "I have no time for your silly little hero antics, Rangers." the assassin said, a not-so-subtle tone of disgust in her voice. "Any last words before I kill you?" "Yeah." growled Blackhawk. "Seven, in fact. ELECTRIC SABRE!" "FIRE BLADE!" "WATER AX!" "EARTH MACE!" "WIND STAFF!" "DIAMOND BOOMERANG!" "SHADOW DAGGERS!" Lightning Galaxy scoffed and said, "That's 14 words, imbeciles. And, again, I have no time for your flashy antics. But you're welcome to try and defeat me with your pathetic little weapons." Blackhawk, naturally, charged at her first. He quickly found that he was at a disadvantage as Lightning Galaxy sidestepped him and grabbed him into a chokehold, then knocking the Electric Sabre out of his hands in the struggle. Quickly remembering his more supernatural abilities, Blackhawk attempted to use a Woo Foo Energy Fist in order to free himself, striking at Lightning Galaxy's torso, only for the latter to block his attack effortlessly with one hand. Nonetheless, the resulting energy blast caused the two to fly apart in different directions. Coughing a bit, Blackhawk retrieved the Electro Sabre, and once again charged at Lightning Galaxy. "You just don't learn, do you?" she taunted, before knocking Blackhawk backwards once again, which also had the effect of shocking him with his own Power Weapon. "Anyone else willing to try?" "I will." Naruto challenged, wielding his Fire Blade with both hands. Lightning Galaxy gave a look that said 'bring it', and Naruto accepted that challenge, unleashing a soaring streak of bright orange flame. Lightning Galaxy redirected the flame back at Naruto knocking him back. Toby tried next, only for the same to happen to him. Lettuce came forward soon afterwards, and was struck down with his own mace after Lightning Galaxy wrestled it out of his hands. Usagi began twirling her Wind Staff to create a powerful gust, but Lightning Galaxy grabbed the staff mid-twirl, and began slowly swinging it around, with Usagi hanging on for dear life. Once Lightning Galaxy let go, Usagi went flying for a few feet and landed on the ground, down for the count. All that was left standing were Pinkie and Ebony. Ebony had an idea and looked at Pinkie, asking, "You thinking what I'm thinking?" "We combine our Power Weapons?" Pinkie guessed. "You got it, girl!" Ebony said, taking the Diamond Boomerang and attaching both of the Shadow Daggers to each end. With a shout of "SHADOW DAGGERANG!", Ebony sent the weapon flying towards Lightning Galaxy, who caught it with no effort. "Ffffuck me." the witch swore under her breath before she and Pinkie were hit with their own combined weapon, knocked down in a fiery explosion. "Now, as I was saying," Lightning Galaxy said, this time unholstering both her pistols. "Enjoy your last moments of life, Power Rangers. I will enjoy taking them from you in slow, painful deaths." Before she could execute the Rangers, however, Lightning Galaxy heard distant stomps that were getting increasingly louder. Looking to see where the sound was coming from, she saw a squadron of Imp Dusters rushing forward, followed closely behind the source of the stomping a massive humanoid Zord, about twenty feet tall, resembling a heavily amored samurai painted in red, black and gold. The torso was adorned by a golden symbol, that of the Hedrian Clan, with the helmet spouting two curved gold horns, indicating just who this superweapon belonged to. "...Well." Lightning Galaxy said flatly. "It seems the cavalry has arrived." Turning to the Rangers, who were slowly getting up, she said, "While there may be a bigger fish on the playing field now, Rangers, I shall return...and we will finish this." With that, she teleported away, cursing under her breath at her most prized kills being taken from her. "Looks like we got company." Blackhawk muttered. "You got that right." said Lettuce. "I say we use the Ultra Power Blaster Cannon to take out the goons, then handle that Megazord." Toby said, which earned nods of agreement. Retrieving their Power Weapons and combining them into the Cannon, the Imp Dusters were quickly taken out. "Alright." said Toby. "On three. One...two...three!" "WE NEED DINOZORD POWER NOW!" Once the Multimegazord was formed, it was joined on the battlefield by the Velociraptor and Spinosaurus Zords. "Give it up, Amazoness!" Naruto said. "It's seven against one; you're outmatched!" "Au, contare, Red Ranger." replied Amazoness. "I have more power." At once she pulled out a silver katana, then gripped the Velociraptor in a chokehold, and kicking the Spinosaurus in the face, leaving both Zords incapacitated for a few short minutes. Using that time to her advantage, Amazoness began pounding the Multimegazord with her katana, causing its alarms go start blaring within the cockpit. Regaining control of his Zord, Blackhawk suddenly let out a barrage of missiles, which hit the Amazord and allowed for an opportunity to attack. "Quickly!" Blackhawk urged. "We need to form the Multiultrazord NOW!" "Right!" the other Rangers said, and once the Multiultrazord was formed, the team summoned the Super Power Sword, and struck the Amazord dead center in the chest, causing it to explode and taking Amazoness with it. On the Diabolic, Queen Hedrian had filled up the rest of the shelves with busts of her monsters, and placed a bust of Amazoness on the very last empty spot. "So, Amazoness is dead." Vipera said. "That makes you the last of the Hedrian Clan. What will you do now?" "Nothing." Hedrian stated matter-of-factly. "Since I'm marrying Diabolica, I needn't worry." "Hmph." replied Vipera, who began filing her nails. "And just when I thought we'd be rid of you." This was met with a blast f enery from both Diabolica and Hedrian, causing Vipera to yelp in fright. The Rangers teleported back to Ebony's kitchen, which coincided with the oven timer beeping. "Looks like the cakes are done." Lettuce said, and went to get them out of the oven to start cooling. A few minutes later, Lettuce handed them out, and once he took one for himself, he sat next to Toby on Ebony's couch. "Before he dig in," he said. "I propose a toast to Blackhawk. He helped us out in defeating the Amazord. TO BLACKHAWK!" "TO BLACKHAWK!" the other Rangers said, then they began to eat.
  5. So, not too long after reviewing Praise Him, the demo EP by black/noise metal artist 666Satanic Army666, I was browsing a list of "noise metal" artists on RateYourMusic, and that album came up. Upon reading the description, I read that later on in '06, Lord Arawn Christkiller found a drummer, dropped the 666s from the Satanic Army name, and with "Thunderstormer" released the final song of his short-lived career, a single known as "Fuck Christ". As a supplement to the Praise Him review, I'm going to look at "Fuck Christ" and see if it lives up to whatever merits Praise Him received from me. ------------------------------------------------- SONG NAME: Fuck Christ ARTIST NAME: Satanic Army RECORDED: 2006 RELEASED: 2006 LABEL: Self-released PRODUCER: Self-produced GENRES: Black metal PERSONNEL: Lord Arawn Christkiller (lyrics, vocals, guitar), Thunderstormer (drums) TOTAL LENGTH: 3:15 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -Fuck Christ: With this, Satanic Army shifts from being the quite literal solo project of one Lord Arawn Christkiller to a black metal duo consisting of himself and Thunderstormer. Along with the dropping of the 666s from the name, Satanic Army transitions from the lo-fidelity black/noise metal of Praise Him to standard black metal. Some things from the previous releases remain, however, such as Lord Arawn's growled incomprehensible vocals and repetitive simple guitar riffs, which have lost all of the surf rockish feel. Lyrically, not much has changed. Guided by Thunderstormer's simplistic beats, Fuck Christ is far better than Praise Him, production-wise especially. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- FINAL THOUGHTS What can I say about this swan song release from Satanic Army, the obscure Czech black metal project? Musically and production-wise, it's far better than Praise Him, and had Lord Arawn and Thunderstormer recorded any more songs, I feel that they could have become a black metal counterpart to the White Stripes. The guitar riff, while simplistic and repetitive, is catchy and creates a dissonance to the anti-Christian, growled lyrics. While this wouldn't gel with any fans of Praise Him due to none of the noisy feel of that demo carrying over to here, it would appeal to black metal fans, at least those who prefer cleaner productions. FINAL SCORE 7/10
  6. Ask Katwoman some purrfect questions

    I posted a new music review?
  7. Praise Him (666Satanic Army666, 2006)

    Yes, you read that title correctly. There is (or rather, was; this artist hasn't released anything outside this demo EP and a single entitled "Fuck Christ" which were both released in 2006) called 666Satanic Army666. I first discovered this strange little outsider black metal project while browsing TVTropes' So Bad It's Good page on music (keep in mind that I discovered this earlier today). Seeing that the YouTube link TVTropes provided was dead, I decided to do a quick search to see if it could be found elsewhere on the site. And lo and behold, a user by the name of KarmaPoliceman158 had indeed uploaded the full EP, Praise Him, which was only about 6 minutes and 39 seconds long. And after listening, I honestly wasn't sure what to think. On one hand, it captured the absolute e d g i n e s s that the early to mid 2000s was characterized for. On the other, it seemed like an honest effort from some nobody metalhead who had dreams of making it big. So, to hold you guys over until my next proper review is posted, let's take a look at Praise Him by 666Satanic Army666. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ALBUM NAME: Praise Him ARTIST NAME: 666Satanic Army666 RECORDED: 2006 RELEASED: 2006 LABEL: Self-released PRODUCER: Self-produced GENRES: Outsider, black metal, noise metal, lo-fi PERSONNEL: Lord Arawn Christkiller (lyrics, vocals, guitar) TRACK LISTING: 1. Praise Him - 0:00 2. Rise the Banners of Satan - 2:44 TOTAL LENGTH: 6:39 ----------------------------------------------- -Praise Him: The title track off this 2-song demo introduces us to the sound of 63SA63: noisy guitar with simple, almost surf rock-style chords (no surprise since black metal is musically identical to surf rock) and growly, indecipherable vocals not dissimilar to Seth Putnam of AxCx fame. Lyrically, the song is exactly what the title says; Lord Arawn Christkiller praising his "warmaster" Satan. They, much like the next and final song on the album, are just as simple as the music. -Rise the Banners of Satan: This song, the second and final off of Praise Him, is musically identical to the first. I mean that quite literally, with the same chord progressions and everything. Lyrically, some stuff is carried over too (specifically the references to Satan as a "warmaster"). The song's lyrics as a sort of boast/call to arms, about how "Satan's army will/destroy the world" and how "ash will be/food for demons". There isn't much I can say, as with the previous song, it's a simple but honest effort. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- FINAL THOUGHTS OK, let's start with the bad of the album: trite, simplistic and e d g y a s f u c k lyrics combined with equally simple chords, growled vocals and extremely shoddy production makes it no wonder that Lord Arawn Christkiller's extremely obscure bedroom project never got off the ground. But is there anything good about Praise Him? If you're into black metal and noise music, then yes. The fact that the lyrics are simple and direct, combined with the music, make this little piece of outsider music so bad it's good for those very reasons. And to be honest, after several listens to the EP, it kinda grew on me. Granted, it doesn't reach the levels of praise I have for my favorite outsider music albums (those being Hi How Are You by Daniel Johnston, Philosophy of the World by the Shaggs, and COMEBACK! by Christian and the Hedgehog Boys), but it is pretty close. Though, that's just my opinion. I'd recommend doing a YouTube search and judging for yourself. FINAL SCORE 5.5/10
  8. Ask Metal Snake

    Is this edgy enough for you?:
  9. What'cha Listening To?

    Pet Sounds by the Beach Boys Fantastic fucking album, and one of my favorites.
  10. Ask GreyKnight151 Anything

    Which version of Vege-Tables is better... the Beach Boys original... or Brian Wilson's solo version?
  11. ask farfour

    how did the old and lime in-jokes come about?
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