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Everything posted by Cha

  1. “Dancin’ in Circles” - Lady Gaga
  2. Cha

    Ask Jeeves

    whats new with the jeeves?
  3. my eyes r green i eat my veggies
  4. Roberta reached the last transparent step of the Stairway to Heaven and looked up at the massive castle in the clouds in front of her. She took a deep sigh out as she begun to stroll the bridge leading to the kingdom. The Skolexian looked below and all around her, below the clouds was nothing but endless warm colors and a soft breeze that blew through her brunette hair softly. She had a feeling just like Hell or Purgatory, this was also a realm of the universe untouched by the physics and laws of space as mortals knew it. She eventually reached the draw bridge and was let inside by faces she couldn’t see. Inside the city walls it was booming with energetic life, unlike the vast terrains of Hell that stretched on for endless miles without seeing another depressed and empty soul there. Not that she didn’t find Hell her home at this point during her years there. Despite all of the breath taking views of the village homes and happy people, she had a lot on her mind. Some individuals there took notice of Roberta and walked up to her, extending a lei of bright flowers for her to wear. “That’s okay..” She softly said, putting her hand up. They shrugged and went about their way to catch up with some others. Roberta stood in a corner away from the crowds, leaning against a pillar covered in vines. She then heard the sound of a portal opening up and shot her head up to see everyone staring as Suave came out of it, holding Jazzy’s fish bowl. She ran to where the crowd had gathered and maneuvered her way through them to reach him. She looked shocked to see the state the oldest God was in. Suave looked directly at her with the upmost somber seriousness and he walked through them, Roberta eventually caught up to him. The crowd stayed behind them as they ascended through the city and into the forest outside of it. “Where are you going Suavey?” She asked. “I’m gonna see Father.” Suave said not breaking his view up ahead. Roberta looked surprised as she had never seen this creature in person before but heard about him through Billy before. They traveled a while through the endless enchanted countryside, trees taller than imaginable soaring over their heads and fields of flowers blooming underneath their feet. Roberta once again intaking her incredible surroundings, Suave suddenly stopped causing her attention to focus back on him. Her eyes grew wide at what she saw before her. She took a step back in fear as Suave continued walking up to the celestial monster. Cthulu put his head down, causing the ground below Roberta to tremble itself. With a glow of purple light, he levitated Jazzy and his fish bowl from Suave’s hands and up to his face. Suave got on his knees and bowed his head to him. Roberta looked around and decided to do the same. “Father, Jebediah has severly injured Jazzy. I used a part of my Altana to bring my brother here to you.” Suave said. Cthulu kept levitating the bowl until the next instant and it disappeared into thin air. Roberta made an gasp in astonishment. Suave got up from bowing and nodded to him, he turned around and started to tread back, Roberta got up shortly. “Wait! So what happened to Jazzy?” Roberta asked. Suave didn’t break his stare ahead once again, “I had Father see if he can heal him. That’s all I could do at this point.” “Couldn’t your father try to defeat Jebediah?” She asked. “Father holds up Heaven itself with his powers. Last time he attempted to leave it it nearly came crashing down.” Suave explained. “So now what do we do?” She asked back. Suave came to a halt in the forest. He turned around and took off his sunglasses, Roberta saw his eyes shine through the rays of light bouncing off the shading trees. His unusual hurt and hardened expression took her by surprise. “We don’t do anything, Robes. Jebediah has done everything possible to defeat us. He has managed to attack and hurt every single one of us Altana beings. There’s nothing left for us now.” Suave continued walking but Roberta kept standing there with a look of disbelief. “S-Suave!” She yelled out. He stopped, his back was towards her. “There’s always a way to solve a problem, despite the odds! That’s what Utsuro taught me. That’s what your brothers taught me..” Suave’s face darkened after this. There was a long silence until he eventually spoke out. “Roberta. I’m nothing but a healer. Do you know why my brothers always tried to protect me? Even Jebediah himself said it, I’m the weakest link. Do you really think I can do anything?” “They believed in a good for nothing worm like me...” Roberta put her hand on her heart. “I know they believe in their little brother who’s definitely stronger than he thinks.” Suave finally turned to face her again, tears were rolling down his cheeks. Roberta felt tears form in her eyes as well, her lip quivered. He turned back around and begun walking off again, she kept watching him as he faded off in the distance of the forest’s mist. She slumped down against a tree and pulled the Dreamcatcher out of her bag. She stared at the Dreamcatcher until she bawled into her hands. All the words spoken to her by the gods, Utsuro and Yuka about her swarming through her head all at once. The wind breezed through the field of flowers while someone not that far away from her collecting them in a basket. ——- Yuka stirred in her sleep and woke up in a jolt, sitting up. She saw Skele/Valentino sitting on the opposite end of her bed in her room, they had drifted off to sleep themselves. “I’m back at home.. How long have I been out..” Yuka rubbed her aching globby head that was still recovering from the multiple personalities inside it. The morphed Globberian smiled back at her and rubbed their red hair. “Fifteen hours.” Skele yawned, Yuka looked surprised and went to get up but Valentino cracked their eye open. “Ya betta be just headin’ to the little Globberians room, sorella.” He said in a somewhat bossy tone. “Thank you two for letting me rest, but with that man out there I can’t let our people and Edo be at risk.” Yuka pulled the sheets off of her and jumped off the mattress. “Edo is fine right now, Yukes. Our people, the Heroes, everyone out there is working really hard to protect you!” Skele exclaimed, Yuka looked a little surprised in disbelief. “Femurson/Ichiro is watchin’ over the Globs, now park ya cabose back here this instant or you’ll really feel the wrath of a Fratello headlock.” Valentino said. Yuka smirked and shook her head, finally sitting back next to them. “How are ya feelin’ Sorels?” “Well rested, but understanding my Fratello is keeping me here for reasons unknown.” She replied blankly. “That’s not what I meant and ya know it, kid.” Valentino stated. “I.. don’t have the time to emote. But something tells me you both won’t me go until I do.” Yuka said. “You bet!” Skele chimmed in. “..It’s gonna take me a long time to process it all. It was such a whirlwind of emotions of uncertainty, confusion...helplessness.” She put her gooey head down, Skele/Valentino looked at her. “The things that man made me see and do. I thought I could handle chaos thrown at me like I normally do. But not at this level.” She paused for a short silence. “Especially when she showed up towards the end.” “So I guess Robes was able to free ya? I had a feeling she’d keep her word dis time. But I’m surprised she managed it. Then again she always had tha habit of pullin’ off things at da last minute.” Valentino reflected. Yuka’s expression would change to a surprised one if she had an actual face, “F-Fratello.. you knew..?” “She visited me in mah dreams before seein’ you. Told me she wanted to save ya with her soul one last time.” Yuka then made a breathy sigh. “I want to put those two out of my mind... no pun intended. I’m so tired and not just because of this throbbing headache from that World War 3 inside of me.” Yuka snarked, Valentino smiled and put their arm around her. “Well please be tired in here with ya family Yukes.” He said. “And your brother’s solid! Aheh.” Skele made a sort of shrug. “Solids are our family. You are my family, Skele.” Yuka leaned onto them, Skele made a warm smile. The scene zoomed onto the bed until switching to another two beds in another room on a different planet some several hours before the previous events. “He’s awake! He’s awake!” Shigeshige could be heard bringing back the shuffling feet of Barkas’s family members. Enshou sat there with a bored expression on his face as they, came barging in and embraced his co-admiral in a hug. “Barky you’re okay!” Hata said in the middle of the family sandwich. Barkas smiled as he felt the love of each of them. Eren waddled over and put his flipper on top of his head. “Good to have you back, Barkas.” He smiled, Barkas doing likewise. “Yeah thank god, I thought I was stuck being smelly king the rest of my life. Now I can get back to being Elizabeth.” Dragonia said joyfully. Barkas took a rathersurprised look at his big brother. “Drag.. you’re out of your costume.. and you became king for me?” He said, Elizabeth just rubbed the back of his neck. “Awh, it was nothing, Barky. Praise the Squirt, he did all the important work like a good kingly kid. My title just gave me an excuse to boss the old man around.” Dragonia messed up both his little brothers hair while they smiled. Eren opened one of his eyes in a realization of something. “Wait a minute.. I thought you were TUESDAY Elizabeth.. Regular Elizabeth! You owe me MONEY!” Eren said furiously. “O-Oh h-hey it’s Uncle Mory! Look everyone!” Elizabeth sweated, pointing to the man. Enshou rolled over in his bed to stop gagging at the displays of affection. But soon enough found himself in an airtight hug by them. “Oh thank you saving our brother Enshou-niichan boomer!” Hata happily exclaimed. “Get OFF of me you peasants!” Enshou pushed them off of him and flipped out his wPhone to make a call. “Yeah Groppie, I know you’re in the area for your concert but could you hitch me a ride out of here?” “Hey major stink face, mind if I catch a ride in your tincan? I’ve got some things to settle on Earth as well.” Elizabeth said who was overlistening in the conversation next to him. Enshou ended the call and put it back in his pocket. “Dragonia, you better beg on your knees before you even ATTEMPT to ask a favor of your Dark-“ The smiling king put him in an air tight headlock as Enshou’s legs were kicking about. “OKAY OKAY! WE LEAVE IN 20!” The Oukoku him go and clapped his hands together. “Great! I assume my kingly work is done here, old man.” Dragonia said. “Not really but I have a feeling you’re gonna disobey my orders anyway.” Jii walked outside the room while lighting a cigarette. Kondo gave Barkas a handshake and then turned to the Shogun. “We should really get back to Earth, Shogun-sama. Toshi tells me things are really getting tense over there now.” He said and Shige nodded. He gave Barkas one more hug until splitting from the room with the police officer. “Good day, your Majesty.” He nodded to Elizabeth who let out a sigh of relief after he left that the stalker didn’t recognize him again. The others slowly followed them until Enshou and Barkas were the only ones left there. Barkas broke the silence after some moments, “Hey.. Enshou. Thanks. I really mean it.” Enshou kept looking at his phone. “Think nothing of it Shijaku but as a I.O.U for yourself. I’ll tell you when you can repay it.” Barkas made a tired face. The Bureian prince then got out of bed exposing the hospital gown that he had on backwards so that it was exposing dark overlordy regions. Barkas facepalmed away with disgust as Enshou got redressed into his normal clothes. He begun exiting out the door with his back turned when Barkas spoke out again, “Please be careful out there Enshou, I worry about you sometimes.” Enshou’s synthetic heart begun to beat a little faster but he continued out the door, back to Earth. ——- “LEMME OUT LEMME OUT!” You might be wondering how we got here in the subconscious of a chaotic British man, locked away for the crimes of witchcraft.. with the strongest men in the universe giving me death glares behind me. “Is he still inner monologuing outloud?” Umibozu said with the upmost blank dead expression. But hardboilian as I am, I was looking ever so ready to face the total danger ahead of us. .. “Yep.” Stephen answered. ...Let’s just state for the record if my apprentices ever find this log I’m recording to notice my bravery in difficult times for all of us. “Yeah I think he’s done. Hopefully.” Oboro said., Heiji turned around from crying at the bars, even more upset looking. “You three are running my hardboiled heroic moment in the face of absolute danger! Camus.” Heiji slumped on the steel seat next to them. “Hey I didn’t do anything yet, isn’t that right Poe? ..Oh that’s right he’s not here on a count of his booboo-dono.” Oboro made another banter face. “Who knew we’d already have an angry mob at our throats when we walked in here. I don’t know too much about the hanging trials other than they always turned out sour for the victims.” Stephen took off his cap and stroked his hair. “Witchcraft hanging trials were much before the enlightened reinassiance era started. A possible flaw in Jebediah’s Earth knowledge?” Oboro asked. “Or he’s doesn’t care, throwing the book out the window again.” Stephen shrugged. Heiji was furiously scribbling this down like Haji would in a time like this. “Jebby.. throwing.. comic book out the window..” Heiji said. “Hey what are you even writing with, Heiji-dono.” Oboro asked, Heiji hid behind his hand and the invisible pen and paper. “I’d be surprised if Jebediah didn’t have anything booby trapped when we arrived. He’s probably listening into our conversation right now, the bastard. The fact these people were able to capture us so quickly and quietly is a bit alarming”. Umibozu looked outside the bars at guard at their door. “Yeah, last time me, Haji and Kintoki were here he confronted us right away in the flesh. He must be really busy.” Heiji swirled around an imaginary cup of Camus in his hand, causing Oboro to stare at it and tilt his head in confusion. Stephen then stood up and spoke up loudly at the ceiling. “Well, that’s it isn’t it Jebediah? You have the four most interesting specimen in your head and you’re about to execute us just like that? Where’s the fun? The excitement? The flamboyant flair? Very unlike the Keeper of Chaos I’ve head of!” The other three looked around and shrugged. That’s when suddenly the prison disappeared and they were in the middle of old timey town, Umibozu and the others got to their feet. “Huh, he must have heard you Captain.” Oboro said. At that very moment a person sped by them and took his hood off. “...You gotta be kidding me.” Umibozu said in a deadpan voice. “Oh brave warriors! Ya gotta help an old man like me. The crystal dragon! He taken mah poor daughter up in his dungeon high above on tha mountain of Jebediah Village! Oh please save her, chaps! It ain’t roit.” The old man fainted into Umibozu’s arms and he tossed him to the ground. “That was a pretty good Cockney accent, Jebby.” Heiji said praising him as he took out another cigar. “JEBBY? Whut kind of name is that? My name is Lord George Francis Smitherson the third good sir!” The old man dusted himself off and adjusted his hood frustratedly. “Oh, my apologies, m’lord.” Heiji took a bowing knee to him, Stephen and Umibozu shaking their head at him. “Come on dungeons and dragons? This definitely medieval ages. What is he doing? Poe would definitely shake his head at such misplaced tomfoolery.” Oboro rambled as he shook his own head. “Maybe Jebby’s into RPGS, Haji tried to get me into one last summer. But I told her a detective doesn’t have the time for anything but solving crime. ...So I made her return the stolen console after we played it once all the way through.” Heiji put his hands in his pocket. “Hey I had a game like that last summer as well but when I came home one day it was gone-“ Oboro then made another banter face in realization. “We’re not here to amuse you Jebediah. We’re here to kill you.” Umibozu plainly said. He started walking away but the “old man” instantly got up and shot a sword in his direction, which he dodged and it stabbed through a ye old shope’s door. Jebediah’s disembodied voice then echoed through the sky around them. “Ah ah ah, my dear Yato! I’m being polite enough to let you gits have a free pass inside my intellectually superior subsconscious! Either play the game or I’m having the heads of your souls chopped off in the bloody gulitone! Mhm~!” Umibozu walked back to them with a discontent look all the while. “At least we know for sure now how aware he is of us.” Stephen put his hands in his coat’s pockets. “Yeah, aware enough to kill us at any moment when he grows bored of us.” Umibozu squinted his eyes, looking over his cape slightly. “Grow bored of you my Umibozu? Don’t be so prude! I could never!” “Will ya please help an ol’ man like me, sons?” Old Jebby begged on his knees. “Sure thing old man. Just tell us about the traps inside there.” Stephen smiled but the old man instantly disappeared into thin air and the four of them found themselves at the base of the mountain. “Well that was awfully gentlemen acting of Jebby to give us a head start. Maybe he can give us some Camus while we’re at it.” Heiji snapped his fingers but appeared in his hand was a steaming cup of tea. “Of course..” He put his head down upset and tossed it over his shoulder, shattering the expensive porcelain cup into pieces. “Into the death trap we go.” Umibozu said in a deadpan and they started the hike up the large mountain. “I gotta say this is quite exciting, who ever gets a chance to go back to the middle ages, well in a sense. I gotta tell Enshou all about this when we get back.” Stephen said looking down at the quaint little bustling English village below them. “You mean when after we have our souls ripped apart in this little trapped cage.” Umibozu added. “Negative Negative Negative!” At this moment Umibozu vanished into thin air, Oboro, Stephen and Heiji looked all around them in shock. “If anyone has any more lip they will also be sent to the dungeon prison with the Yato! I’d advice against that though, it is guarded by the ‘dragon’.” Jebediah made a little laugh, Heiji and Oboro looked worryingly at each other. “We better hurry up into the dungeon then!” Stephen continued to hike, Oboro and Heiji shook out of it and joined him. ———— “Alright keep driving.” Soutatsu told the Elites. They kept going until they reached the Bakufu castle and stepped outside with him and the Bores henchmen. Testu was in the trunk again. “Don’t even think about starting anything, Sasaki. Edo is already swarming with Shinra and Dakini. One false move and I have them destroying this planet.” “YEAH NO FUNNY BUSINESS BIG CHIEF.” Bores hustled causing Isaburo to roll his eyes. He kept looking ahead as he was casually clutching the wheel. They finally arrived at the castle and Isaburo and Nobume escorted them out of the car. The teenager kept giving little glares to the man but he kept his view on the back of Soutatsu’s head. Shinra members popped from the ceiling out of no where and bowed to their leader. “Search for Nobunobu and Soyo-Hime.” He ordered and they disappeared as soon as they arrived. Bores, Hercules and Tatakin made nonthreatening looks at the two bored looking cops. As the Shinra entered Nobunobu’s bedroom, he was was in the corner on his bed with his back turned. They slowly walked up to him and then quickly turned him around. He was revealed to be a sack of potatoes with his clothes on. The Shinra raised their eyebrows at each other, not realizing someone else had slid into the room with them. The person put his arms around his chest with something in his hands. “It appears this monarch has already collasped by the local protestors.” Soutatsu and the Elites were standing there as they heard and heard a loud explosion coming from the other room. “You..” Soutatsu looked at Isaburo evilly and produced ninja stars from his wrists. “I cannot help if the “”””freedom fighters””” around the city tried to blow up this place before you did, Soutatsu-san. That’s how it is in Edo’s government every single day, some bastard trying to kill the other.” The camera panned back to Zura in the other room who walked into the hallway. The blinding grey smoke was filling castle rooms as he went down them cautiously. He turned the corner, still with no one following him. He then went into ShigeShige’s bedroom across that hall and rummaged through one of his drawers. In a flash, he was met by stars to the back of his head, but he effortlessly slightly moved his head, they crashed into the mirror of the drawers, shattering it on impact. However upon examination upclose to the scene these stars weren’t of Amanto origin. “There goes the first time we’ve trepassed in the Bakufu castle this far into it. Too bad we were stopped by the Shogun’s lapdogs.” Katsura said unamused and disinterested. The reflection on the broken mirror of a mopheaded man who put down his magazine. “You damn Freedom Fighters sure love to protest peacefully at the worst times. I couldn’t even get done rereading the latest issue of 3-Z.” Zenzou put his hand on his hip. “I’m so sorry to hear that. I’ll make sure to send you a copy from where you’re going.” At this Katsura did a backflip and his katana clashed with Zenzou’s stars in a flash, causing a loud metallic sound. During this period of clashing, Katsura had handed something in Zenzou’s hand. Zenzou pushed him off and ran with the item in his pocket. Katsura slouched at the doorway, watching him go off. “Damn lapdogs indeed..” Katsura continued down the smoke filled hallway. The view shifted to a few doors down where Matako and Takechi were fighting off incoming the Shinra in front of of them. “Senpai, how come the only time we’re actually doing terrorist stuff against the government in this story is when we’re SAVING the government?!” Matako shot rounds at two of them, hitting one in the shoulder and the other one dodging it. “Think of it like this Matako-chan, if Katsura-dono makes it as Prime Minister it would be great publicity for the band!” He then returned to cowering behind Matako. “WHY WAS I STUCK WITH THE PACIFIST?!” She yelled as she continued firing. But then her guns suddenly stopped working, she realized they had ran out of ammo. “DAMMIT, I TOLD YOU TO COUNT WEAPONS INVENTORY, TAKECHI!” She barked at the cowering man. “But you’re the real tactical expert Matako-chan. I’m just the strategist.“ They saw more Shinra were about to attack them. “I guess I didn’t strategize for this..” Matako and Takechi covered their heads for the impact when a samurai had landed in front of them and they shielded the weapons from hitting them. “Freedom fighter scum of Edo. You shall not be able to commit an act of terrorism with the Yagyuu Clan, sworn protectors of the Royal family around.” Kyuubei then taunted for more of the ninjas to come rushing at the three. Meanwhile Bansai was back on the ship stroking his mustache in the living room, Soyo was petting Poochie on her lap as Nobunobu had all five octopuppies all over his. “Thanks for being my hero, Bansai.~~~~~” Soyo swooned. “It was nothing little dudette.” Bansai said in the corner still stroking it while now looking in a handheld mirror. Nobu leaned over to her, causing a puppy to spill out of it, Nobu freaked out and rushed to pick the tiny baby up with his handcuffed hands just before it hit the ground. “Phew, that was close. Young lil’ Missin, y’all literally realize we’re being held hostage inside them terrorist’s ship?” He told her. “Enough big cousin! Don’t make me look bad in front of my Hubby~~~.” Soyo made dreamy eyes at the back of the rockstar’s head. Kyoushirou casually entered the room with a healthy salad and sat down to turn on the TV. Nobunobu turned his attention to him. “Y’all wanna buy a pup?” He asked. Intrigued Kyou raised an eyebrow as the program on the screen begun. “Welcome back to another exciting round of Wurvivor! I’m your host Ketsuno Ana!” Right behind her were the contestants out in the open of downtown Edo when the Bakufu castle blew up. Suddenly a swarm of Shinra came flooding out out Edo’s main street. “Annnnd for today’s challenge we will all be hiding inside the camp for the duration of today’s episode! She hurried them inside the chopper and they quickly flew away. “Man, I’m missing all the ter- I mean Freedom Fighter fun down there.” Shinsuke slumped down crossing his arms. “Tell me about it.” Pirako did the same. “ALRIGHT change of plans! According to the producers, our new amanto guests have used our campsite as a base!” Ketsuno was freaking out but trying to keep her professional composure with little luck. She searched around the helicopter for something for them to use. She grabbed the pilot’s bag lunch, threw out the contents on the floor and handed it to a confused FDL. “First one to blow the most air into this plastic bag wins!” Ketsuno said trying to smile. “Hey what the hell, there isn’t even a camera man here.” Shinsuke was met with a shiny apple pushed into his mouth by the host herself. FDL just shrugged and tried her best, with little luck. After only a literal minute had past, Ketsuno ripped it from her hands and handed it to Otae who also had little luck as did Saitou and Shinsuke. “I guess no one wins immunity! Oh well! Everyone head with me to tribual council!” They all just looked around and blinked, still sitting in the place they had been in before. “Well! You five all look like you’ve had a fun time at the challenge today! Alright let’s get to voting. Good thing I always keep spare blank voting cards with me! Shinsuke you’re up first.” Shinsuke got up and she handed him one. He was confused where to go until she pointed for him to stand by the pilot who just gave him a blank look back. “Uhh, you want your apple back?” Shinsuke awkwardly said. The others did the same and all voted. “Alright votes counted. The person who gets the most votes will be asked to leave the helicopter immediately. Since we don’t have our jury with us today, it looks like the pilot will have to break any ties we have. Also no video confessions today, sorry.” “Well it’s not like we have a camera here anyway.” Pirako whispered. “If anyone has the hidden immunity idol speak up now!” Of course no one spoke up. “Now then. First vote,” “Saitou. One for Saitou.” Shinsuke made a smirk at this. “Shinsuke. One for Shinsuke.” “Z.” Shinsuke shot him daggers at this. “Saitou. Two for Saitou.” “Pirako. One for Pirako.” “Shinsuke. Two for Shinsuke.” “And our pilot’s vote... “...Saitou. Please exit the chopper.” Saitou looked surprised after being safe so many times before. ”No hard feelings Saitou, it’s all apart of the game!” Pirako said in good spirit. She then shot FDL daggers clearly knowing she voted for her. They all heard another loud boom coming from Edo high above, getting Ketsuno even more antsy. “Too bad so sad, Saitou! Here’s your parachute! Goodbye!” Ketsuno quickly handed the man it and pushed him out of the speeding chopper. “Wasn’t that just a regular backpack..?” Otae whispered. “Girls, I think our host has finally gone bananas.” Shinsuke then had the fruit stuffed in his mouth. ——- “Now I can’t make any sense of these directions, Captain.” Oboro was looking at a map inside the barely lit by torch dungeon they just had entered. It was hanging on the wall there. “I see what you mean Oboro, everything in general in this world is all written in ye oldes. That’s like hardcore boomer!” Heiji exclaimed, Oboro sighed in despair. “I give up.” Oboro stepped away from the board. Stephen got closer to it and squinted his eyes. “This is Latin! Can’t you read Latin, Oboro?” Stephen asked. “I can only what’s in Sensei’s book because I’ve studied it so often.” Oboro got closer to it again and scratched his jizzy chin. “Huh, I remember actually these phrases.. Ask and You Shall be Denied. Forgive me sparkling oceans of the night, reject me cosmic eyes of the heavens. That’s one the lines in the beginning of the universal reset chant! What could it mean in a context like this though?” “Cosmic eyes of the heavens. Like those gods right?” Heiji asked. “Also those with purple Altana, like the Captain.” Oboro added. “So do we go left or right?” Heiji said looking at both enterances to the cave. “Maybe if I say the way I want to go, I will be denied. So if I say right... we go.. left?” Stephen said grasping for straws. The other two shrugged and followed him down the left tunnel, it instantly shot up sharp daggers, nearly piercing their faces and shattering Heiji’s sunglasses. “Eep.” He squeaked. “I guess not..” Stephen and them carefully backtracked to the enterance again but this time it had three tunnels instead of two. Stephen rubbed his hand down his face. “This is gonna be a maze isn’t it.” “Why don’t we split up?” Heiji asked the two oldies. “Ill advised Heiji-dono. Who knows if we’d ever see each other again if we split up.” Oboro commented. “Well who knows if we’ll ever see Umibozu or sunlight again for that matter. Something tells me everytime we get this wrong he’ll just add another tunnel.” Stephen spoke. After some moments they reluctantly agreed and parted into each dungeon tunnel. Oboro went left, Heiji went in the middle and Stephen went into the right they kept walking down for several minutes until they found themselves suddenly walking next to each other out of no where. “We did the last thing we wanted to do which was to split up. Maybe that was the point of that verse, Captain?” Oboro said but the man shook his head. “Who the hell knows, damn riddles.” Stephen said. They saw another dead end with one tunnel, more Latin written on the top of it. Oboro and Stephen were studying it more closer this time as Heiji was kicking up some rocks bored. “Hey it’s just one tunnel! We can totally-“ He quickly walked inside it but was met by a burst of flames and screamed. “HEIJI!” Oboro and Stephen ran by the enterance and peered inside of it. Heiji tumbled out of it, comically burnt to a crisp and gave a thumbs up before falling on the hard ground. The two returned to the scroll on the wall. “Denied and revoked I was, the gods have casted me into the triangle of fate. Woe is my spirit. Let my burning sins be washed clean by the dark healing waters.. Well this is obviously about the Bermuda Triangle.” Oboro said. “Or the author is trying her best to write deep sounding poetry at midnight on Friday, I believe in her to get it done by Monday.” Heiji grasped his burnt lungs, wishing he could wash them down with his favorite drink. “What puts out a ‘burning’ fire? ‘Healing water’? Once again about the purple Altana inside of that ocean. Whatever Jebediah’s up to certainly has do with it.” Stephen commented. He slowly ascended in the cave and looked surprised as nothing happened. He shrugged and motioned for the two to follow him. “AAAAAHHHH!” Heiji jumped several feet back and landed on his face again outside of it. However, Oboro had no problem. “Uhh wait out here Heiji!” Stephen said back at him and he nodded, covering his face. “Will he be safe back there Captain? Maybe that was Jebediah’s plan.” Oboro whispered as they continued. “Or he’s luring us particularly both in because of our blood.” Stephen added “He has both colored crystals now, what could he want with us?” Oboro asked. “What does anyone craving power want? More control.” Stephen simply commented back. Oboro looked straight out into the opening of the cave after these comments. Suddenly the ground underneath Oboro’s feet collasped and fell down what appeared to have been a trap door. Stephen fell to the floor and looked down it. “OBORO!” The floor had returned back to normal without a trace of anything ever had happened. “You’re right Stephen! I am interested in you! Or should I say moreso Oboro. It’s time I finally shattered the illusion of his reality his teacher brought onto him all these centuries.” “No more games Jebediah we have gone far enough following them.” Stephen furrowed his eyebrows at the dark ceiling of the dungeon cave. But Jebediah wouldn’t answer him back. Without anything to do, he decided to continue onward to whatever sort of thing laid ahead. Heiji finally got up from covering his head on the ground and looked around him. He took out another cigar and put his hands in his pockets. “Well I guess I’m on my own. I got to figure out some way to save everybody from Jebby’s mess.” He sighed as he took out a puff, thinking about recent events. “Especially you kids.” ——— Cut to the Kabuki district, shadows of large figures marched across the buildings of the businesses who were closed up for the day. The shadows bounced across ruins of the Snack Shop and Yorozuya’s office laid in mess of as they passed by it. They stepped into the ashes, that dragged into the snowy floors. It was completely silent in the little square town. A amanto stepped out from his flower shop and greeted his fellow species. “Hey Ougai long time no see! What brings you to Earth?“ “Hedoro.. my old comrade what have these betraying apes done to you?” Ougai looked at his former brother in arms and the flower on top of his noggin. “Now don’t you worry about me, Ougai. I was just about to close down my shop and head for the ice rink! Everyone is down there today for the holiday bash.” Hedoro pulled out keys from his apron’s pocket and locked the door. Ougai squinted his eyes. “What kind of trap do you have and your friends have planned there, old man?” Ougai said. “Nothing but some Christmas cheer! Or Hanukkah or Kwanzaa! Or whatever you celebrate. You’re welcome to come along!” He happily walked past the Dakini as they looked puzzled. Ougai was hesitant but decided to follow his old friend, his men following behind him. “I really hope you know what you’re doing with this Liberation stuff Ougai-san. It seems like you are jumping the gun because someone else told you to pull the trigger.” Hedoro had a content smile on his scary but kind face. “I know what you’re doing, Hedoro. Soutatsu may be an exasperated man seeimg to pick a fight with the universe but he does have a point with these untrustworthy humans.” Ougai looked around at more buildings, also devoid of people. “Or maybe in times of uncertainty and fear anyone is willing to point fingers at each other to ease themselves. I just was hoping someone with your common sense wouldn’t have fallen victim so easily to it.” Hedoro twirled the keys on his large finger. “Ah, here we are! See I told you everyone in town was here!” The ice rink was brimmed full of citizens skating around and enjoying themselves. “An amusing trap of yours, Hedoro-san. But noneoftheless, I shall humor you and your friends.” Ougai and his army men continued on into the rinks. “Alright. We’re at war but we’re not barbarics. Women and children may escape now to avoid any unneeded bloodshed.” “You won’t exactly find any women or children here. But we can certainly entertain you for a while!” The citizens there took off their winter clothes revealing to be the Kamakko crossdressers, all posing in different ways as sparkles rained down on them. “Oh no! It’s individuals completely respected by society as they should be!” Some of the Dakini men said as the girls came fighting towards them. “Woo! LGBTQE+ pride!” Tako cheered as she watched her fellow hostess rain down the punches and kicks on the amanto. “Kintoki come on! We need help in here my dude!” Haji called out, she and Poe were guarding the hole in the ice surrounded by the Wohn John. The Yato were all off on some house delivery for some reason. “Oh, right!” Kintoki ran back to them but of a sudden a small ship came plummeting from space, crash landing in the rink as several individuals from both sides of the army ran away, however it did comically crush on some Daikini, gotta have some karma. Disgusted Enshou stepped out of the door as it literally fell off as he opened it. “Hey Emiko! What brings you here? I thought you were dealing with life threatening surgery.” Kintoki smiled at him. “Playing the Queen of Pop without her biggest monster is a death penalty on Burei. Now get out of my way, Tako. My Sweetcheeks tracker says he’s somewhere underneath this ice.” Enshou pulled out a blinking device and it lead him right in front restaurant. He stepped inside of it getting Haji and Poe on the defense. Enshou squinted his eyes. “Move it small child and even smaller birb.” Kintoki ran inside and stepped between them to defuse the situation. “It’s okay guys. Emiko has the right to chase after someone he cares about.” Kintoki said. “Eh, his funeral I guess.” Haji shrugged as did Poe and they stepped away from the hole. “Just be careful of Jebediah! That guy kind of looks like you actually with those squiggly eyebrows of yours.” Enshou squinted his eyes even more at his mention. “BOD. I should have known my brother would have his big meaty claws on the Captain next.” Enshou pulled a snorkel and flippers out of his cartoonish pocket and put them on. He put half of his body into the freezing water. “Tako, I expect you to keep covering my shifts while I’m gone without pay.” Kintoki gave a military salute as Haji and Poe just looked at him. Enshou stared at his forehead for one silent awkward moment in the shop. “That’s Tako. Yes from Mama’s, you’ve seen him before FLTBC. Why do you ask.” The trio gave him a weird look, Enshou gave them a scowl as he put the mask on his face and ascended into the icy depths below. Stephen soon approached another wide opening of the dungeon with another scroll by it. “I guess I’ll just have to wing this one this time without Oboro.” Stephen staring at it when he saw a purple and green light flash from within it. He ran up to the enterance and saw a wizard standing inside of it. “What the..” “SIR!!” Stephen ran inside the cave and put his hands on Enshou’s face. “Unless this is another ugly Bureian illusion..” Enshou tossed him on the floor and pressed his black leather boot on his old face. “Taste this illusion’s boot, Captain.” just made a smirk and then chuckled as he got up from the floor. He then wrapped his arms Enshou in a big hug, which the prince didn’t return of course. “That portal really was you. What are you doing here Sir?” The Captain asked, he looked down at his wizard costume covered in blood. “Stupid FLTBC wouldn’t be quiet about coming here, that non-glob always nagging me on what to do. It’s almost like she represents the conscience the Evil Dark Overlord totally doesn’t have.” Enshou wiped blood off of his cloak. “I think I killed whoever was in this suit before I got here, we’ll hide the body later I’m tired as fuck.” Enshou pushed him off of him and rubbed mascara down his weary eyes, Sweetcheeks just smiled again. “We’ll it’s good to see you’re recovering, Prince. Let’s see if your new heart can handle a few jumpscares around here.” Sweetcheeks cautiously continued into the cave, Enshou following by his side. “...I got your letter, Captain.” Enshou shifted his eyes around the cave as he felt the glare of Sweetcheeks now on him. “His name is Shijaku not Prince Oukoku.” Sweetcheeks made another little laugh. “And.. also...Forget it. I must having these stupid humanizing sad feelings because of that BOD.” Enshou suddenly stopped walking midway in the cave, causing the Captain who was a bit ahead to pause as well. “What is he, Sweetcheeks.. some demon that was in my head and now he’s claiming to be an empty soul? He doesn’t know the meaning of that phrase.” Enshou looked up at the cave. “You’re nothing but a coward. A man who ran away from everything. You may have lost everything, but it’s meaningless to you. I have lost everything I loved and cared about from the Tendoshu and I suffer the unimaginable pain of it every day.” “You break down people in your hands just to watch them bleed and suffer and take no consequences for those actions. Is that truly the mark of a king?” “You never had anything to have an empty soul about, when you never cared about Burei, its people or anything ever to begin with.” Enshou shifted his view from the ceiling and continued walking, not looking back at his tearing up lover behind him. “S-Sir...”Sweetcheeks was completely astounded by the prince opening up a bit for once. “Come on Captain, let’s end this ugly wanker so I can go back to not feeling.” Stephen made a grin and nodded, catching up with him. The camera panned to another location inside the dungeon, unknown to the two, “Where am I..” Oboro opened his eyes only seeing pitch darkness, not remembering the fall he had only prior moments ago. Suddenly a bright flash of light nearly blinded him. He put his hands up to try to make it out but also shield his good eye. “Simple Oboro.. The unappreciated apprentice, the lackee of a man who always pushed you aside for better verisons of yourself, more powerful, more obedient pawns..” The light had disappeared, Oboro was shocked to see Shinsuke and Joe glaring over him with large smiles. “That is enough Jebediah. I have made peace with Sensei in my mind for quite some time now.” He said. “Really? With all the times he’s insulted you? Belittled you? Well I can’t say I’m too surprised you’re still siding with a Peace Keeper like that!” “As oppose to siding with you Jebediah?” Oboro got up from the floor and Shinsuke and Joseph made eerily loud laughs with unnaturally huge smiles, their jaws nearly unhenging before they disappeared where they came from. “I’m not looking to side you against an old friend! Oh no, no no. In fact my dear Oboro, I visited said friend just recently. Who knew he still is fond of living in that dusty old shack of his?” Oboro’s pupil shrunk at this. “You visited Sensei in the past..?” He asked, turning his head all around to possibly see the man behind the chaos. “Why don’t your teacher ask him yourself! Ask him specifically the lie he has kept from you all these years!” A sword appeared before Oboro’s feet, he slowly picked it up and noticed a reflection of a portal inside of it. He was hesitant at first but noticed how genuine the portal looked and gave it a try. “S-Sensei..?” Oboro looked surprised. “You have summoned me once again, Jebediah. But I think I know why this time.” Shouyou said. “Sensei, that truly is your past self and not another illusion of Jebediah’s mind.. What is he talking about this thing you haven’t told me?” Oboro asked everso confused and looking for answers. Shouyou surprisingly looked truly upset, making Oboro even more concerned. “...Sensei?” “I should have told you.. I just thought you weren’t ready back on Okiwana, Oboro. I entrusted you with more power all these years than you lead on to believe. More power than even those gods posess. Power that could live up to mine.. or even greater, more than the universe has seen.” Oboro’s jaw dropped, he stared straight ahead. The sword suddenly vanished into thin air in his hands. “Isn’t that something?! You finally trust this man and he hides the truth from you once again! Keeper of Lies is more like it!” “What power was he referring to, Jebediah?” Oboro slowly said. He suddenly felt himself fall into a chair that appeared out of no where and strapped down into it. The chair zoomed at tremendous speeds with him on it across the dark realms of Jebediah’s mind until it reached a single mirror. “You really are as slow as your Joui comrades call you Obo my dear. Just look at yourself, deep within. Your damn blood that’s what it is! That the bloody git wouldn’t even trust his ol’ dear Tendoshu with his entire blood of both crystals. How Utsuro did it still mystifies me!” Oboro took a long hard look at his reflection, he put a shaky hand up to his cheek, “I-I.. have purple Altana in my blood as well..?” “BINGO!” Jebediah rapidly spun Oboro around in his chair, higher and higher, eventually stopping as Oboro felt he might throw up. “HOHOHO! And not a transfusion of just any purple Altana blood my feather loving friend! A man born of both! Completely raw and unheavenly powers, not even those blasted other purple breathers could match with.” “And you want some of my blood don’t you..?” Oboro got straight to the point. “ON THE CONTRARY!” Jebediah spoke out energetically and excited. He spun Oboro around more his chair and until he flung out of it and soar at tremendous speeds until landing on the floor safely. A hand picked up his chin and looked straight into his eyes. “My blood is almost just as pure as yours with all the chants I gave it. Sure I wasn’t born with originally! But this side of me was!” Jebediah comically knocked on half of his head he made from the chants with a goofy expression on his face. He loud chuckle and disappeared from plain sight once again. “You are the single item Utsuro clung onto all these years. He knew you couldn’t change despite everything else doing so. But I have a sort of soft spot for my other Keeper half in my old age. I wouldn’t dare wipe out the only thing he cares about.” “But?” Oboro interjected. “Always looking on the negative side I see, Obo! Must be your brooming look. I’ll make it simple. Stay out of my plans or be destroyed just like your teacher and those other gods! Mhhm yes! Quite simple indeed!” “I don’t think I will do that, ever, Jebediah-dono.” Oboro got up from the ground, dusting himself off. “Then have a joyous time seeing all the people you care about in here and outside be destroyed! I will control this glorious twenty-second universe with a glittery fist!” Oboro squinted his eye and then stared directly up at where the voice was coming from. “I’d destroy you before that ever happened, Jebediah. You must not understand how much I’m willing to put on stake for the sake of peace and harmony of this universe. To let you take away the joy and laughter of the people inside of this most precious timeline and turn them into your slaves is out of the question. I will protect and serve it until the day my bones fade into dust and the last drop of crystal dries up in Sensei Shouyou Yoshida’s immortal blood. This is my stand as Oboro, Guardian of the 22nd Universe.” Jebediah stared at him from his mind, furrowing his eyebrows and then made an audible sigh at seeing the connections again, “You remind me so much of him it’s unearthly. And people call me the reflection of him. The Keeper of Peace to my Keeper of Chaos.. one really doesn’t exist without the other, even with him gone, huh? If only your teacher showed any conscious about protecting the universe from being reset back then.” Jebediah paused for a long moment, Oboro raising an eyebrow. “I’ll give you some time to sit here and think it over what you want to do young chap. Ta-da for now!” Oboro stood there deep in thought about the powers he just realized he had. Had Sensei really not told him about them? Did he really think he wasn’t ready after so many centuries to handle the power? He knew until recently he didn’t have the emotional stability to reset the universe all by himself. Was this another important page to his life? “Keeper of Peace...” Oboro clutched his heart pumping both bloods passed on by his teacher and stared up at the darkness of the void he was in. The camera rose up to the surface of the dungeon where Enshou and Stephen were... uhhh? “HHHHHH C-Captain.. thank you for the bottle of water, I was parched.” Enshou took his lips off of the bottle and wiped his mouth. He handed it back to Sweetcheeks for safe keeping. “Now then, about this stupid fucking cave thing. Of course this is a RPG, BOD was practically obsessed with them when we played them in the Land of Enshou.” They were standing outside one of the enterances, the Captain was reading over one of the Latin phrases again. “Hmm.. if we go right-“ He scratched his bearded chin but Enshou cut him off. “It’s left.” Enshou instantly started walking in that tunnel, Sweetcheeks flanking him, “Sir be careful! We don’t know-“ Enshou was completely unharmed inside, Stephen looked surprised and caught up to him. “How did you know it?” He said rather impressed. “Easy. If I know my brother’s dick and I do, it points to the left. So every turn we make has to be left.” Enshou said with the upmost seriousness in his face causing Stephen burst out a chuckle. “Sir, it’s been way too long since we’ve been together.” He smiled ahead. “I agree Sweetcheeks, maybe we can finally plan out that Alaska trip after this. You know I always wanted to try skinny dipping inside an Alaskan aquarium and not get the electric chair for it.” Enshou made a deviously dastard face, Stephen patted him on the shoulder. They finally came to the end of the tunnel but it turned out to be a dead end. The men stood there looking around for a solution. “What was this dork’s plan again?” Enshou asked him. “We were suppose to fight a dragon or something.” Stephen replied. “If that mongrel wanted to fight stinky Dragonia, he was just outside the coffin in my ship with me, unfortunately.” Enshou crossed his arms, Stephen went to speak up about this misinformation but decided against it. He would force the author to be the straight man instead. Ano? “Maybe what Husband needs is a beautiful maiden to be swooped up by the dragon!” A familiar voice called out behind them. “No, smelly Dragonia already has a monster of a girlf- WAAAAAAAHH?!” The both of them whipped around. “FLTBCCCC?! What on Earth are you doing outside of my subconscious? I DEMAND you get back in there!” Enshou exclaimed pointing his finger. “I don’t know! One moment I was inside your brain and the next moment I’m out here! Hi Captain!” FLTBC smiled. “Oh hey FLTBC, good to finally see you in person.” Stephen said surprisingly unphased. Enshou jumped on the old man piggy back style and hid behind him, but still pointed at her. “GAAHHH SWEETCHEEKS! PROTECT ME FROM MY OWN FRANKENSTEIN CREATION! NOW SHE’LL BE DEMANDING FOR BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS!” He yelled. “Well we’re already in one bumbling Bureian’s subsconscious, can’t rule out the possibility of another’s leaking into here.” Stephen shrugged and was immediately punched in the back by a bumbling Bureian fist. “Makes sense to me!” FLTBC folded her hand delicately together. She squatted by the wall and took a look at the rocks. “Well if anything my architectural and historian degrees have taught me about medieval European dungeons..” Stephen raised an eyebrow. “What? I may be a Sinister Mastermind but I support women’s education.” Enshou chimmed in. “Aha!” FLTBC heftly punched the wall, causing a secret passage way to be revealed. Stephen was surprised but noticed it was being to collasp very quickly under the domino effext of the other rocks. Him and Enshou quickly ran into the passage way. “Oh my ever precious stars, I’m so overjoyed! To actually be alive and possibly sentient with other people around me! I could just break out in a melody!” ”No time for your silly gimmicks, FLTBCinderella.” Enshou hoisted her over his shoulder and the three of them tumbled inside right before they got crushed. They stood up and noticed the darkness surrounding them. “Well this is just great. I should have never taken a Wendadryl on the flight to Earth, I’m gonna fall asleep like a baby in all this lack of light.” “Sir Wendadryls are for allergy attacks, not motion sickness.” Stephen chimmed in despite the situation they were in. “I know Sweetcheeks, I’m allergic to Dragonia..” Enshou crosses his arms. “I’ll get a warm blanket for you, your Excellency!” FLTBC smiled. There was a loud rumble and they felt the earth itself started to quake. Enshou got out a match from his pocket swiped it against Stephen’s ass to start a fire for them to see. “Very resourceful Dark Allah!” She praised him. The rumbling stopped but they still couldn’t see much in front of them, only hearing the sounds of the cave dripping. They decided to carefully slowly walk around together, Enshou leading the pack. He bumped his head into something and felt right on his royal butt, causing a booboo. He instantly shot up into a defensive karate stance. FLTBC was holding the match now as Stephen examined the unfamiliar solid object in front of them. “Hmm.” Stephen studied it carefully but Enshou boredly gave it a heft kick to the side. Instantly a giant eyeball snapped open in front of them unexpectedly, causing them to freeze up as they saw it. The enormous monster turned around unleashed his jaws, sending a deafening roar. “..I should have went with the whoopee coushin..” Enshou squeaked. Stephen dropped the match in some oil puddle as they ran like hell, causing the entire cave to light up where they could see the beast in close pursuit. “What now Captain?!” FLTBC said carrying her frighten and trembling overlord above her head. Jebby the Dragon was blowing deadly flaming breaths all in their directions, causing them to dodge them in all sorts of ways. Stephen thought of if for a second and reached into Enshou’s pant pocket, causing the prince to make a pervy face. He took out a rope and grappling hook, throwing it over a rock on the hill. More unexplained chaotic tomfoolery in a cave’s design or maybe the author’s lack of imagination, eh Jebby? “Hold on, Lady! You too Sir!” Stephen grabbed onto FLTBC’s waist who was holding Enshou over her shoulder. “I’m the king of deus ex machina even in the dream world.” Enshou said as they landed on the hill and looked down at the dragon from above. “You know, I wonder if that handsome monster is guarding something. Everyone has something to guard internally! I guard my instabilities that I won’t be able to make a difference in protesting equal paying rights Land of Enshou for women! Ahee.” FLTBC stated. “I’m coming to that protest Monday and I will fight for your rights, FLTBC. We don’t let those corporate monsters in the government of the United States of Enshou take them away.” Enshou said as FLTBC wrapped him in his cape to keep him warm from the effects of the Wendadryl. “I wonder..” Stephen peaked behind the dragon to see the unmistakable glows of a purple and green crystal now emitting from behind the beast. “I knew Jebby wanted to make this interesting! Sir! It’s his Altana crystals! It’s hidden behind-“ “GAAAAHHHHH!” “DARK OVERLORD!” FLTBC called out upset. Stephen looked next to him to see an empty spot, he snapped in fromt of him to see that the Jebby the Dragon had grabbed Enshou by his Italian black leather boot that costed him 4,055,429 Whuck E Cheese’s tickets and was dangling him about. “DRAGONIA’S GOT ME GOOD! I WANTED YOUR BROTHER TO BITE OFF MY FOOT, NOT YOU YOU UGLY BIG ANTENNA CHILDHOOD BULLY!” Enshou said while being ragdolled around. “Dragon meant to look like my estranged Husband, you put the Dark Overlord down this instant! ..Please.” FLTBC said. “Estranged? Man your non-legally binding marriage is really falling apart huh- AAHHHH!” Enshou was smacked against the wall, damaging his soul. Stephen looked around desperate for a solution. “Grab the chair! Grab the chair!” FLTBC exclaimed to him. “This isn’t wrestling!” Stephen exclaimed, but FLTBC wished up a giant chair and threw it at the dragon, he came rushing back up to them. “Well I’ll be damned.. somehow you two can control Jebediah’s subsconscious, even if I don’t understand it-“ The Jebby Dragon swiped Sweetcheeks off the hill. “CAPTAIN!” FLTBC shouted. But Jebby caught him in his claw before he fell to the floor. He started carrying them away to drop them on the fires now engulfing the cave. “Jebby the Dragon if you don’t put them down right this instant I’ll... I’ll.. divorce the real Jebediah!” FLTBC said getting angry for the first time in her nonexistent life, a strange feeling to her but the dragon would still not budge. “FINE! Consider us divorced!!” She huffed and crossed her arms. “Damn. I hope she signed a prenup so I get half of his stuff. Also I have completely lost feeling in this foot, Captain.” Enshou said in a rather blank tone. Stephen could not break the grasp which the monster had him in. “GAAAHH THIS IS REALLY IT!!” They were mere inches away from the fire, Enshou felt the burning sensation of the flames near his soul, him and Stephen closed their eyes as they braced for impact. When suddenly the dragon’s head had a huge boulder thrown at it, causing it get gnarly banged up on the side of its face. It let go of Stephen and Enshou, the latter screaming on the top of his lungs. “I got ya!” FLTBC wished up mattresses for the two to land on. The dragon roared in pain and shifted his attention to who had struck him so easily. “Anyone hurting a friend of Katsura is an enemy of mine! Come here and taste the power of a REAL Dragon!” Jackie begun charging at him with his sword, making a battlecry. “I’m not friends with Zurako I merely steal her men.” Enshou rested his weary head on his Temur-Pedic. “Wow! So that mysterious shadowy guy following behind us the entire time ever since we came the coffin turned out to be important!” FLTBC chimmed in causing Stephen shake his head in grief. ———————- Roberta had her feet pulled up to her chest still sitting in the same place as before. She had stopped crying but her tears had dried on her cheeks and she was making little panting breaths through her nose. She wasn’t even aware someone was there until she felt the feeling of a flower being put behind her ear. She snapped out of it and instantly looked up at the woman who was squatting down to her level. She froze, feeling that she recognized them despite never meeting her before face to face. “Sorry, I couldn’t help but noticed how down you looked over here all alone. Are you okay, miss?” She asked, Roberta was still in shock and didn’t speak. The solid smiled and helped her to her feet. “My name’s Sophia! I attend the forest around these parts. You must be Roberta!” At this Roberta latched onto her in a hug, Sophia looked surprised but warmly returned it. Roberta soon broke it and stumbled around for words to say. “I’m sorry I just.. I can’t believe it’s actually you.” Roberta said awkwardly looking around. Sophia made a little chuckle. “I guess Yuka has told you quite a bit about me. She always did like overpraise me when I didn’t deserve it.” Sophia picked up her basket of wildflowers and ushered Roberta to follow her through the meadow. “You’re everything to Yuka, Sophia. You still are.” Roberta said looking at the woman. Sophia looked straight ahead smiling, “And she’s still everything to me even after all these decades. I guess that’s how it is with us solids and liquids.” She then put her head down but kept her expression. “You know Roberta. Solids only live as long as actual humanoids do, Yuka would have had to face the pain of losing her other half one day. It was just unfortunate it happened so soon. I just wish she would finally forgive herself for what happened that day.” Roberta’s heart hurt at those words. “I’ve always wished for that too. Yuka never deserved the pain and heartache she has endured for so many years.” Roberta shook her head upset. “Never once..” They kept walking through the meadow as the amber hues were starting to indicate the sun was beginning to set. They were heading more slowly back to the city but Sophia made sure they were taking their time in conversation by picking more flowers to make as ornaments for the people back there. “But despite everything that has happened, I’m overjoyed! I never saw Yuka as happy as she is with you. I’m so content to have finally met the wonderful woman she in love with!” She plucked a few daisies and put them into her basket. Roberta looked absolutely taken back. “I don’t deserve that title.. I betrayed her trust on several occasions. I ruined every single thread of any kind of relationship with her and not to mention Valentino..” Roberta continued. “And now I’m being told by literally the most nicest and blameless person that I’m this wonderful being, not to mention with her?” Sophia kept picking them though, still smiling. “A rose is still beautiful no matter how many times you cut it down and have to reshape it. Sometimes it just needs a little TLC, it may have its thorns but at the end of the day it’s still there and still beautiful. When Yuka lost her parents, Fratello and I tried being there for her. I knew I couldn’t completely take her sadness anyway though. What you did down there for Yuka earlier, Roberta.. proved to me your unselfish caring for her is still inside of you. That to me is beauty far greater than any rose.” Sophia got up, she patted her boney hand on Roberta’s cheek, the Skolexian still looking at the Globberian with somber feelings. “Tell me one last thing, you’re still in love with her aren’t you?” Roberta shook her head disagreeing. “Hmm?” “It’s much deeper than that.. When I look at her even from a distance..” Memories were beginning to flood in Roberta’s head, her vision started to become blurred again. “Being in love implies contentment on an infatuation level. She never wants to see me again and yet.. I have this overwhelming feeling of protecting her, especially now looking at the past. Back when I was resurrected for the first time as I was shunned, back on Earth when she was injured in war and now after being her being imprisoned inside a cage.. Yuka’s happiness is far more important to me than her returning those romantic affections I have for her, or of any kind of affection.” Sophia took her hand off of Roberta and shifted her view down. “Being in love isn’t infatuation, Roberta. It’s quite the opposite. It’s founded on the very building blocks of protecting and wanting the happiness of the other person. Both types of love aren’t very different at all from each other are they?” “-I guess that’s what makes people like us guardian angels, huh?” Sophia warmly smiled and continued walking on. The breeze of the meadow rustling through Roberta’s hair ae she started to reflect on these words deeply. She caught up to her as she was treading down the forest hillside. “I just don’t know how I can save Yuka, Valentino and all the other people I care about. I don’t have the power.” Roberta kept looking ahead as the kingdom was getting into viewing distance. “You have a pure heart though, Roberta. That’s the secret to people even with the most power wish they truly had.” Sophia simply stated. Roberta unclutched the Dream Catcher still in her hand from earlier and stared at it. She suddenly started to sprint some distance away from the solid as her mind was set on one thing. She didn’t stop as she reached the city and stood up on the water fountain in the middle of it, catching the notice of several people there. She then morphed her hand into a megaphone. “YO SUAVE! Where ever you are hiding listen up! You and me and this entire city are gonna build a giant Dream Catcher big and strong enough to trap Jebediah in. ARE YOU IN?!” She shouted, causing the crowd around her to make little cheers and agreements. Suave appeared at a balcony where he had been hidden from sight and poked out slightly. “That would never work Roberta.. He’s in the living realm now. We don’t have the crystals strong enough, not to mention we don’t even have all my brothers to cast a binding spell.” He said depressed. “Aw come on! Are you telling me the God of Sax is a little afraid of the symphony I got brewin’?” She taunted him, gesturing her hands for him to get closer. “Come on! Suavey! Suavey Suavey!” She pointed to the crowd and they begun chanting it as well. Suave smiled and rolled his eyes. He teleported to where she was at and nodded his head. The crowd gave a loud cheer in return. Sophia walked into town and she handed the basket for the other villagers to grab out of, making a little smile at Skolexian the entire time. She handed one lei to a rather big gentlemen and his family, who was also grinning at the woman at the fountain. The plot shifted to another area of space and dimension unattainable by mere mortals. “It seems you three have returned, where is the fourth?” One of the Tendoshu members said as the injured three came through a portal and took their respected seats on the council of the top ten members. “Jebediah has turned his body into his own. We managed to teleport away before time in Oukoku resumed.” One said holding his aching shoulder. Another one spoke up, “He is much more powerful than we thought. Possibly as much as Utsuro was. We must continue our plans with the Shinra if we expect to find a way to take that Altana monster down just like we took the other one.” They agreed to themselves and resumed discussing other matters. The leader spoke up, “Our number of members has greatly dwindled within all these wars, it is advisable we consider the possibility of recruiting new members into our organization.” There was a bunch of talk amongst themselves until they heard a portal opening up from down below. “What’s this gossip about about new recruits?” A prim and proper man stepped out, blowing a kiss. All the members immediately stood up, one teleported to Jebediah and went to take him down but he grabbed him by the throat and broke it. He continued casually strolling by them. “I say he’ll be regenerating back to normal any moment now! But I can’t say the same for all of your dwindling Utsuro blood! Meanwhile those Latin tricks have made my immortal blood fresh as a daisy!” The main leader teleported even quicker and stepped in the Bureian’s way. “Jebediah. We cannot allow you further pass on. You may join us but that is the extent of our generosity. Continue on and we will kill you.” He said. “JOIN YOU?! OHOHO!” Jebediah had a laughing fit and held his belly. “I am tickled pink, I really am. Why on Earth would I join you bloody mongrels when I already had membership to your little club. No thanks! I’m rejecting your invitation! Nice Altana Key you’re supporting on your hand ol’ chap but those are so yesterday.” Jebediah snapped his fingers and mountains of Altana begun to burst from the grounds themselves, permanently killing one of them as the others teleported out of the way. “Unfortunately for you Jebediah, we have some tricks up our sleeves as well.” The leader snapped his own fingers and the Altana ceased to flow. He then powered enough in his hands to focus his energy at Jebediah, the ground split underneath the Bureian but he had jumped to one of the sides just as a giant wall of green Altana stormed out of it. Jebediah crawled and to his feet, dusting off his trousers, “Nice move old bat! Buuuut if you had purple you could control the very comic book itself, such as this!” Jebediah twirled around on the heel of his boot and then snapped his fingers when he stopped. He levitated up one of the Tendoshu in the background and opened the ground again, this time throwing the man into a pit of Hell. Jebediah clapped his hands together and the ground closed up again. The Tendoshu all teleported and tackled him down this time. Four of them held down his arms and legs as the other five begun slashing down his body with their swords. Jebediah couldn’t move under their tremendous weight. However in the middle of all of this, he channeled all his energy into a thought. A large portal started emerging from underneath them all and swallowed them up. During the transition into wherever it was taking them, Jebediah managed to shake off four of them. He pushed two of them outside the realm of the timeslip tunnel and into the realm of nothingness, instantly dying. His Altana was patching up his wounds of his body as he was punching and kicking the other seven in all directions, managing to kick another two out of the portal tunnel. They finally landed in their destination in time and space and continued fighting as the plot shifted to Isaburo and Soutatsu who had been brutally fighting as well. A blonde samurai then busted open the doors of the castle, a wave of injured Shinra he had fought off falling at his feet. “Man.. I really should have picked up my costume before I came here. After this arc I’m like, totally super gluing it onto me.” Elizabeth rubbed his five o’clock shadow tiredly. Soutatsu squinted his eyes and pushed Isaburo aside with his shoulder as he walked by. “Dragonia... this doesn’t concern you. Go return to your kingdom, ‘lost king’. Or are you back to playing terrorist and pretending to have amnesia?” Soutatsu stared down the antenna man aross the room. “Oh I think it very much does. Refresh my old fart brain. What is it these Bakufu morons call Oukoku? Its biggest ally? As rightful heir I’m just protecting my good ol’ allies here!” Elizabeth said as he made a big sarcastic smirk. “I said stay out of it..” Soutatsu grumbled, Isaburo took this distraction to escape the room. “You already killed one Oukokuan king, wanna give it a second go you blue haired doofus?!” Dragonia taunted him. Soutasu grimly squinted his eyes and came full steamed force at the prince, throwing him through several walls and finally shattering the last one leading to the royal courtyard, in a dusty maze. The terrorists heard this loud commotion from the hallway and ran to the closest window to see what had happened. “ELIZABETH!” Matako yelled. He was sitting in a heap of drywall and the garden’s flowers but slowly got up with his sword for support. He spit out some blood and flower fertilizer and made a chuckling smile. “Dragonia or Elizabeth, the title doesn’t matter, I always get myself into deadly danger, don’t I?” He slung his sword up, in an instant Soutatsu appeared behind him and tried to slash him with stars. Elizabeth dodged two of them as he quickly turned around but managed to get sliced across the chest by the third one. While looking down at himself, Soutatsu grabbed his arm and flung him upside down, he landed on his head and antenna on the hard gravel. But as Soutatsu had his hands clenched him, Dragonia managed to kick him in the face with his boots and levered himself up. “This is what you wanted, right! Sons avenging their fathers? Come at me again you angsty sumbitch!” Dragonia said in a smartass tone, Soutatsu came speeding up to him again this time with an even angrier punch to his face. The fighting continued as the castle was beginning to catch on fire from Katsura’s previous smoke bombs. Meanwhile the Shinra were sitting around the base of Kada’s castle guarding her as the fights with the Dakini and other Shinra were taking place with the humans outside in the city. Suddenly a bright light blinded them and an individual heftly stomped his boot on Kada’s head as he arrived, instantly killing her from the blow. He wipes the blood off his foot and looked at them all contently with his makeup composed of dark blood and some grounded up Tendoshu bones as white powder. “K-KADA-HIME!” Several Shinra shouted out. “You mean your little princess? Oh I wouldn’t put too much worry into her. She’s been dead for ages!” Jebediah picked up her body and it turned back into a dead Tendoshu. The Shinra stood there flabbergasted and started to slowy drawl out their weapons. “W-what.. did you to Kada-Hime you unholy monster..” The Shinra had looks of horror as watched the fragments of bone on the floor. “Oh heavens no, not me! Turns out the Tendoshu killed your princess months ago in Harusame captivity during all that Koukan nonsense and were using one of their decoys to fool you. Congratulations my fellow Bungan chaps, you figured it out even more slowly than the Skolexians did! You Liberationers were trying to PREVENT more chaos from the Tendoshu when you were merely their puppets seeking to destroy you from the inside without you even knowing it. But you’ve been fooled by many Tendoshu leaders lately, haven’t you?” “What do you want with us..?” One asked. You’re Jebediah we heard about in court, aren’t you?” Another asked. “Well my, I am rather exhausted from killing off an entire race of those sharing my immortal blood, my dear Shinra. I was thinking of taking the rest of the day off if you gentlemen wouldn’t mind.” Jebediah fanned his tired self and slumped back into a king’s chair that appeared out of nowhere. “You..singlehandedly killed off all the Tendoshu...?” Another said in disbelief. “H-He has the powers to make things appear out of thin air..” One whispered. “Think of it as my token to everyone in the 22nd universe. Now we are finally all rid of those pesky strawhats!” Jebediah snapped his fingers, they all turned around as they heard rumbling. Yorozuya were some distance in the city doing something when they felt an earthquake underneath their feet. “Gin-san...?” Shinpachi asked. The ground erected a giant renaissance castle underneath Kada’s hide out, most the Shinra frantically all ran out of it before they were crushed. Jebediah disappeared again and reappeared on one of the balconies. “I will be back very soon my good subjects! Just need to catch up with one last old friend. Tomorrow will be my coronation of Chaotic King of the Universe!” He strolled away inside and dramatically closed the curtains behind him, leaving the amanto below there frozen in shock. Jebediah snapped his fingers inside his regal bedroom and opened a portal. He stepped inside of it, closing behind him and walked through the harsh deserts of Purgatory until reaching the oasis. “Bunny, I’m home!” Jebediah smiled with his eyes closed. The moment he stepped inside the jungle though he ducked before a large blast from an umbrella could knock his head off. It made a steaming giant hole in the tree behind him. “My! Quick on the drawl today aren’t we madam?” Kouka stood on edge of a rock just behind a waterfall with her umbrella still pointed at the man. “Leave here now, Jebediah.” “Oh come now Kouka my dearest dear, I visit Utsy, that pesky RALRO but I was saving the most beautiful for last!” Jebediah vanished and appeared right next to her, posing and resting his chin on his fist. She crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. “Well unlike them my soul isn’t an image of the past. So I could kill you if that’s what you wanted.” Kouka said in a deadpan voice, Jebediah just made a boisterous laugh. “I just had to tell you about my coronation plans!” Jebediah put his hands behind his back and begun strolling around. “That worm and weak healer have something planned to take me down this time. But Ol’ Jebby has something brewing himself. The moment they ascend from heaven will be their last moment to realize it’s too late. Heaven and all its powers of life and death will be at my grasp.” He made a sinister smile and folded his hands. “So you’re trying to pierce Heaven? Try telling that to that lughead Billy who attempted to and failed some short time ago. Not even Utsuro could and his blood was pure of the purple crystal.” Kouka looked around the oasis but didn’t keep her guard down for one second. “Utsuro couldn’t or Utsuro didn’t feel like it was worth doing so? A man more powerful than those brothers guarding the book itself?” Jebediah turned his head towards her. “My dear Kouka.. Once I have Heaven, there will be much more that I can obtain. I am ascending levels far beyond what that Earth monster could even dream of.. If only he wasn’t shackled to that shed of his to be able to see my grand glowing symposium about to take place.” Jebediah jumped down the rocks and started ascended into the blinding greenery of the forest. “Like you’re shackled to your empty feelings?” Jebediah stopped walking but kept on a little smile. “You and me aren’t so different as you might think Jebediah, we both have lost family and loved ones. We’re avoiding them for maybe selfish reasons. Except I know when to let go of my emptiness and realize I can’t change everything that has happened to me.” “I’d keep your distance deary, you’re not the only one of your kind trying to rustle feathers with me right now. But you’re husband in my subsconscious right now is much stronger than he is leading me to believe. I wouldn’t want you to ruin that chance of him trying to prove it by forcing me to kill him.” Kouka’s expression turned to shock and disgust as he continued walking . “Good day m’am.” Jebediah kept going until he eventually disappeared from plain sight. TBC
  5. “For the Benefit of Mr. Kite” - The Beatles
  6. No, this is Impossible.

  7. “Last week on Edo Wurvivor!” “Tribes Kibou and Yuuki were set up for the very first time and alliances made!” Some stock footage showed Eren and Shinsuke talking it out last week. “But tempers were also flown!” Some tape was shown of FDL badmouthing Lily from last week and vice versa and another of Nobume and Saitou teaming up to try to vote out Shinsuke. “In the end Enshou won the competition for Kibou in a dash to the finish line in snowboarding!” Footage played Enshou dancing on his snowboard and thrusting at the camera lens. “But will his team be able have immunity again this week? Are the contestants compared for a even greater challenge? Will sercurity ever get Gintoki away from me?” She smiled and two big beefy guys lifted him up by his arms and punted him out of sight. “32 Days, 15 contestants, 1 WURVIVOR!” “YEHEODDODELODLELDEOEL!” Katsura happily sung aloud to the theme song as the scene had cut to all the contestants sitting at the cabin mess hall, most annoyed at him but Shinsuke dreamily smiling. Ketsuno Ana stood in front of them all with a grin on her face. “Well! We were gonna go ice climbing today, but outside blizzard outside wasn’t as strong as we anticipated for ratings, so we’ll have to make do with a challenge here today!” “Uhh, don’t you mean BECAUSE of the blizzard we’re not gonna do that challenge?” Matako asked. “No!” Ketsuno smiled and Matako scowled. The confession scene cut to Gintoki. He was just staring there boredly at the screen until the camera men yelled at him to speak. “Oh yeah right, the confessional. After last week’s near death experience that somehow the camera didn’t catch, I could use an easy challenge.” Gintoki rubbed his stomach where his kidney once was. Another confessional flipped to Pirako, “I didn’t mean knock out the Bro and decorate head with red pretty perm head flowers! But I had to keep my A face on, even if that means turning the entire snow bank into a lovely bright garden!” “Uhh, you’re not suppose to try kill the fellow contestants..” The producer whispered from outside the camera. She got out her sword and it static back to the regular scene. “However, there is gonna be a twist to this challenge!” Ketsuno was handed a brief case by one of the beefy sercuity guys. She unlocked it with a million different complex combinations lasting for several minutes mildy irritating the contestants. It finally opened, inside was an invitation that was sparkling gold. A confessional switched over to Monika, “Oh I knew right then this challenge would be special! Our Chief Kamui has dazzling shiny things like that everywhere in the ship. I mean, most of them are just painted gold wrappings for his chocolate coins, but still! Hee!” “Alright let’s head it out to the buses for a roadtrip!” Ketsuno said ordering them to follow her outside. “But you didn’t even show us the contents inside the briefcase, all we saw was a blinding bright light!” Matako exclaimed but everyone ignored her as they fled out. “WHY AM I THE STRAIGHT WOMAN HERE?!” Katsura came up and gave her a reassuring mom pat on the head and she sighed as they walked out together. In the corner, King was looking at Pirako and Enshou intensely. —————-— Soon after the Shogun’s incident at the egg restaurant, word had gotten around of two unlicensed cooks on the run from the law. The Mimawarigumi had been sent out to take on the case, seeing how the safety of the Shogun was their number one specialty. Though, with members running low with the vice-chief’s absence on a reality show, Isaburo was forced by the government to have a cop from another squad teamed up with him. “Sasaki do you report?” The voice on the radio asked the,. “Yes.” The brothers both said, Isaburo made a sigh of annoyance, Tetsu moreso making one of somber. The black coat looked outside of the window as Isaburo finished his text and ignited the key in his car. Testu was at lost between his feelings of nervousness and sadness around this estranged man. He begun to stray in thought. I don’t know why they had us teamed together. I’m one of the lowest ranked members of the Shinsengumi so it’s not like I could have importance with a case this huge. I guess everyone else in the squad was busy with Chief Kondo’s marriage or that reality show. It’s not like Isaburo never really apologized for what happened in Thorny. Actually, this is the first time I’ve had alone with him since those events. He just has become quiet, cold and awkward to me ever since. Moreso I guess, how it was growing up with him from a distance as an illegitimate half-sibling. “Can you stop inner monologuing.” Isaburo said, Testu looked down at the floor for several minutes before he spoke out again. “Hey, I know about the terrorist thing.” Tetsu couldn’t believe what he literally just uttered. Isaburo stopped the car to a screeching halt in the middle of a busy traffic road. Cars were honking at them, but Isaburo continued looking straight ahead, Tetsu knew that look meant his older brother awaited an answer. “Don’t worry, no else knows but me.” He said, Isaburo looked at him with a blank expression. “I’ve just assumed you know, from observing you with those guys. But.. after everything that has happened in the past year with Okiwana and Edo getting taken over so many times and such.. seeing how much you’ve changed as an individual to the people around you... l feel like it isn’t too much of a thing to worry about to tell the Shinsengumi.” Isaburo’s eyes widened but he shook out of it and looked ahead, continuing driving. There was another long silence after that that felt like an eternity to Testu. He had a lump in his throat knowing he at least got some words off his chest but couldn’t guess how his older brother was taking it. Isaburo parked the car near the curb and got out. “..We’ve reached our stop.” Isaburo said and closed the door behind him as Testu got out as well, not noticing his own old sock monkey in the back. Cut to the Edo castle, with Soyo, Kagura and Hata sitting around one of the dining tables. Kagura had been living there since her house had blown up as Shinpachi was at his own home doing Shinpachi things. The TV in front of them was on the live episode as the cast was still traveling on the bus. “I’m beting all of Shinpachi’s inheritance that one of the girls win Wurvivor. They can beat out all these loser old men with both hands tied behind their backs, uh-huh.” Kagura took a sippy of her royal brand apple juice. “I think Bansai will win!” Soyo exclaimed. “Yeah Bansai~.” Hata said dreamily and rested his head on his hands. “He’s not on the show you LUGHEADS.” Kagura karate chopped both of their heads as they kept smiling. There was a brief tap of something outside the window sill. “You know, if anyone will win it’s Shimaru-niisan. He’s got mad tactive skills, better than any of these clowns can hatch up.” “I said STOP STALKING ME.” Hata yelled and Sougo was so startled, him and the ladder to fell to the ground. Soon after this event, Nobunobu creaked open the living room door a little. “Uhhh, I reckon y’all want to come in to see this in the laundry room..” The three of them shrugged and got up to follow him. They were beyond shocked at what they saw there. Kagura picked up Hata by the scruff of his cape. “OI, bubblegum, you let the dogs hang out, didn’t you know your dog was a girl?!” She asked him. “Gender is a binary construct! I let Poochie decide what to identify as!” He said and Kagura dropped him to the floor, he made a squeak sound. Kagura walked up to Sadaharu. “And you Sadaharu! Don’t you have any shame? Giving in like any man into heat because of some tempting seducing woman?” The little yato scolded her dog as he whimpered. “Come on Kagura-chan, just look at how cute those little guys are!” Soyo pointed to one that could barely sit up straight without the help of his mother and father. “HHHHH, PUPPIES!” The trio looked at each other and then rushed over to picked them up. Nobunobu sat down as one of the octopuppies crawled in his lap. He tried to use his phone with his clunky handcuffs. “I just got a message Shige is coming home but uhhh he was.. POISIONED?!” Nobu exclaimed. “S-Soyo! Did you hear-“ “Yeah mhm sure big brother can handle it.” Soyo was immensely into playing with the pups. Nobu just sweatdropped in disbelief still. “You know, this might be the first crossbreed of these species! We should have a vet to check up on them to make sure they’re all alright.” Hata said petting one of them in his hands. The girls agreed as the door was not even a second later opened. “Did somebody call for a vet?” “Wow! Talk about some fast service!” Kagura exclaimed. Heji walked over got down on Poochie’s level to examine her. “Just as I thought, this dog is pregnant.” He said and Haji facepalmed. “Uhm, my dog WAS pregnant.” Hata chimed in. “Hmm quite.” Heji said. Haji then pulled him aside for a private conversation. “Boss, what are we doing here? I thought we were chasin’ the Globberian and Yato!” She loudly whispered. “They knew knowing too much, Haji. And the woman one scared me.” Heji explained, Haji’s expression darkened. “Besides, I think we’ll get all we need from these guys.” They broke apart their group huddle and resumed to the others. Heiji kelt playing with his phoney baloney instrument kit, pretending to know what he was doing. The others were watching intensely. “I see now..” “Yes?” Soyo asked. “Have your pets spayed and neutered.” He gave a Wob Barker thumbs up and the kids all kicked him down and kept at it as he screamed. Nobunobu sighed as he was still on his phone and petting a doggy. “W-WAIT! PLEASE! I JUST NEEDED DIRECTIONS TO THE GLOBBERIAN VILLAGE!” “THAT’S WHAT THIS WAS ALL ABOUT?!” Haji yelled. “Go straight out of Edo and then take a left inside the mountain sides, pardner.” Nobunobu said plainly. “YES, THANK YOU!” Heji broke free of the abusive children and sped off, grabbing Haiji, who also abused him. They ran through and out of the castle, avoiding guards all the while. They were back on the streets now. “Haji, that’s the last time I take clients inside my head.” “CLIENTS INSIDE YOUR HEAD?” She was about to lose it. “Hey I’ll take any work we can get.” Heji replied back and Haji’s expression was even darker now. The screen cut to a scene near by in an alley, a amanto was setting up some bedding for the night and then too a swig from his canteen. ”No, I’m not going to the castle to see octopuppies, squirt.” He hung up and shoved his phone in his jacket pocket. “Damn I got the Old Man’s royal hounds chasing after me, as if being a terrorist wasn’t pressuring enough. I thought that was gonna be a one subplot JOKE, AUTHOR.” Elizabeth yelled at me, but hey I was happy to write his voice and see his handsomeness. “Man I miss my suit.. ugh why do humanoids have so many fingers.. I miss my simple flippers.. I hate my beautiful rugged voice..This is worse than the time Jii caught me losing the contest in my bedroom when I was 15.” He swiped a match against a trash can and warmed his hands by the fire. “Hey! Yeah you!” A man wearing cardboard called out from where Elizabeth was. The Oukoku sheepishly turned his head and hid his face with his hoodie moreso. “Say, you look familiar.” “Uhh quack.” Drag said with his hand over his mouth. “Yeah I feel like I quacked too.” Hasegawa adjusting his shades. He looked in the distance dramatically and his theme started to automatically played. “Oh Woward Jones take me out now..” Dragonia dragged his hand down his not-duck face. “After I was tutoring for my boss, everyone kind of forgot about me and dropped me off here. Once again put on as a standby puppet for the authors.” Hasegawa took a puff out of his cigarette. Elizabeth made a silent annoyed sound. Suddenly two cops walked in the alley, but before the not-duck could react, the taller one with the white coat pulled out a poster. “Excuse gentlemen, have you seen these two outlaws who are responsible for the death penalty crime of poisoning of the Shogun?” Isaburo asked. “LAAWH.” Elizabeth made an obnoxious throat clear for no reason as he kept staring at the fire warming his hands. “Very well then, I understand. We’ll be on our way.” Isaburo said and him and Tetsu turned the other way. “Woah! Did you hear that dude? The Shogun was poisoned! Who would have done that? Do you think terrorists?” Hasegawa asked. “Hey I’m not thinking of my crewmates, I got my own problems to deal with right now- I mean quack.” Elizabeth replied. “You know, we should be real careful.” Hasegawa then banged his chest with his fingerless gloves. “Us old homeless guys got to stick together.” “Uhh I gotta take a whizz over there..” Elizabeth tried to dash out of there but Hasegawa grabbed his shoulder before he could escape. “There’s this place I heard that has all sorts of delicious dishes and watch me switch the subplots right now!” Madao made the blonde man take a stroll down the filthy streets of Edo as Elizabeth made more little groans. ——————— “Alright we’re here!” Ketsuno said as they kept driving thru Edo until the bus arrived at a soup kitchen for a homeless shelter. They filed out of the vehicle and inside to see three old guys sitting there. “Today you will be serving up these old timers!” Ketsuno pointed to them all looking dead and defiled. Elizabeth covered his face more with his hoodie and slid down into his chair. “You call this a challenge?” FDL put a hand on her underpaid hip. Katsura walked up to Musashi and looked him in the eye. “IKUMATSU-DONO’S FATHER, HOW ARE YOU? DOES IKUMATSU-DONO KNOW YOU’RE HERE?” Zura said loudly, for some reason thinking he was deaf. “You better eat when you can!” Musashi exclaimed probably not aware of his surroundings. “You know, things have gotten real hard ever since Ikumatsu-dono’s husband died ten years ago in some kick the can accident... and also when he died from those terrorist gang members attacking him.” Katsura looked somber. “Oi, Zura what are you talking about you doofus. Wait.. are you talking about Kurokono? That noodle shop owner was married to him? And he didn’t die 10 years ago or whatever that second time was, come on we had an entire arc about it!” Gintoki straightmanned. “He did have a knack for people thinking he was dead because he was so forgettable, huh? B-But not to this Shinny..” Shinsuke was handed a tissue by his husband and loudly blew into it. “Yeah this like, majorly blows. Feedin’ a buncha old boomers lookin’ asses, I have that job already at home.” Nobume crossed her eliteo arms. The scene cut to a Enshou confessional. “I don’t know, I’m pretty good at feeding boomers. Last Whanksgiving I stuffed the Captain like a turkey.” Steve and Joe had turned on their TV in their office shortly before this scene but then simultaneously turned it off now. Ketsuno then ripped off her outfit revealing a tuxedo underneath. The entire soup kitchen turned into a massive wrestling ring before the contestants own surprised eyes. A large audience cheering of robots appeared under the stadium. “What..” Shinsuke started. “The...” Gintoki finished. “Hey, I recognize this craftsmanship and those androids! This must be Genghai-sama’s work. How silly, he didn’t even tell me he had a helped out on this contest’s project!” Tama smiled happily. “WURVIVOR CONTENTS ARE YOU READY TO RUMBLEEEEEEE?! LET’S HAVE THEM EAT IT!” Ketsuno shouted into the crowd chanting “EAT IT!” Behind them the tribes were having mixed expressions of nervousness, smugness or excitement. “Both of your tribes will choose three members to wrestle with our three old timers.” Ketsuno pointed to the empty ring and then underneath it the floor lifted up Madao and the two others to visible view. “Again. Choose wisely! No exchanges after they’re made!” Ketsuno let the tribes be amongst themselves now. The screen zoomed up to the Kibou tribe huddled up and had a shot underneath them all to see their faces. Otae and Pirako smiled, Tama had a slightly surprised face, Matako and King looked determined, Enshou and Zura had resting bitch faces and Gintoki was picking his nose. “My favorite angle, camera man.” Enshou commented. “How is this a challenge?” Matako raised her eyebrow. “I mean two of those guys are old geezers and the other is Lizzy! For some reason. Another old geezer.” “Lizzy is in this competition? I didn’t see him, Matako-dono, just some blonde seme.” Katsura said and Matako just loudly sighed at her boss. “I’ll try to square up against that piss colored hair loser, he totally cheated in our last fight together.” Enshou told them. “Enshou minion, you’re with me for back-up.” King nodded. “I’ll take a shot it with one of them too. It will do me good since I haven’t had any single dialogue in these contests yet.” Otae smiled. They put their hands together and gave one big Banzai! before breaking up and scowling menacingly at the other tribe. “Alright Yuuki tribe! You’re up first!” Ketsuno exclaimed as stood right behind the ring. Shinsuke, Monika and Saitou got into the ring and faced Musashi, Hasegawa and Dragonia in that respected order. But before the competition could properly start, Elizabeth immediately tackeled down Shinsuke and pinned him to the floor with his elbow. “Hey I won.” Elizabeth said and the bell was rung. “WINNER! Elizabeth! Shinsuke you are OUTTA HERE!” Ketsuno threw her thumb over her shoulder. FDL and Nobume looked super pissed at him from the crowds. “COME ON MIDGET I’VE SEEN YOU TACKLE A SENSEI IN THE BACKSEATS BIGGER THAN THAT!” Nobume pointed to Elizabeth’s antenna. “GET UP!” “Always gotta be those white devils.” Stephen shrugged with his hands in his pockets. Eren turned his head at him and gave him a look. “I’M NOT EVEN YOUR OPPONENT YOU STUPID DUCK! AND WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?!” Shinsuke yelled at his commander still crushing him as his swears of pain were censored. “Guess it’s my turn.” Hasegawa shrugged and before their very eyes he transformed into a mega cardboard robot. “Cool!” Monika exclaimed excited. She shuffled her feet against the floor, causing the electricity in her program to unite. She zoomed in green glitch puffs around Hasegawa, getting him dizzy and confused. As he was walking around to find her she zoomed by and pulled out her yato umbrella, causing him to trip to the floor. She quickly took the chance to pin him down. “1, 2, 3! Monika WINS! Hasegawa you’re OUT! For now.” Ketsuno said as the old man groaned. “Hee hee!” Monika got up and helped him get a ice pack for his achy head back stage. Elizabeth still had frustrated and groaning Shinsuke pinned down underneath him as Elizabeth was browsing the web on his phone. “Hey midget, did the new wOS update cause your Witter app to pull up really slowly too?” Elizabeth asked. Unknown to Elizabeth, Saitou appeared behind him and kicked him down with a precise move. Saitou looked up at Dragonia, shaking his head at his silent enemy who broke his silence. “Hey duck, it’s that afro guy who uhh, man I can’t even remember the Valentine’s Arc.” Shinsuke said rather tired in a heap with the ducky. In a flash Saitou stood across from Musashi. “You better eat while you still can.” The old man had a glowing energy around him and slowly levitated into the sky a few feet. “THE HELL IS GOING ON OUT THERE NOW?!” Matako yelled out from the stands. Musashi used his otherwordly powers to have large ramen noodles lash out at Saitou. He dodged them as they came and used the noodles as stepping stairs to to reach the old man. However, Musashi matched up the black coat’s sword fighting with his noodle tentacles. They continued for several minutes matching each other’s blows until Musashi was able to grab Saitou by his red afro. He flung the man to the ground and pinned him with a noodle. “1, 2, 3, WINNER! MUSASHI!” Ketsuno cheered out. “Only one win for the Yuuki Tribe!” FDL and Stephen rubbed their hands down their faces. “YES!! WIN THIS FOR KUROKONO-DONO’S SAKE, IKUMATSU-DONO’S FATHER!!” Katsura yelled. “Zura enough with the jokes. Come on, the dude’s dead.” Gintoki said to him but suddenly the scene had switched to Edo’s cemetery, a cool breeze was rustling the left over leaves from autumn. “W-what’s going on..” “OI IT WAS REAL?! HOW?!” Gintoki exclaimed. Ikumatsu kept staring at her husband’s grave as the wind was picking up and hollowing now. As she begun to feel streams down her face, a hand clasped on her shoulder. “Hey, Ikumatsu, I know you’re a strong woman but he wouldn’t want to see you like this. I know towards the end it was hard for you two stay together too but Kurokono was always smiling, even to his death. Don’t you think Daigou would have wanted his beloved wife to keep smiling for him?” Ikumatsu stared at the man for a few moments in shock before embracing him with a weeping and smiling hug. “My diner is always across from your guys ramen shop, if you need anything.” Pakuyasa made a little smile as her arms were clasped around his neck. “AND WHY IS HE PLAYING THE GUY TO COMFORT THE WIDOW BUT ALSO HOOKS UP WITH HER LATER ROLE?” Gintoki yelled. “DON’T SPEAK ILL OF GRIEVING WIDOWS GINTOKI!” Zura headthumped him. “Of ALL people you shouldn’t have the right to imput on that!” Gintoki snapped back. They continued arguing as the next team was setting up for the next fight. ————— Flashback hundreds of years ago in universe two, a human was taken out of a blue liquid tank and placed in handcuffs in a pillar of some enormous station base somewhere in space. The strawhat leaders stared at the man for quite some time as he smiled back at them. They all started to walk away but nodded for one of the lower leaders to stay behind. He smiled at Utsuro as he took a cup of tea from under his coat. “Keeping that warm this entire time under there?” Utsuro smiled back at him. “Oh you know how the Tendoshu are, stuffy rules ‘n wh’atnot.” Jebediah took a sip of his drink and continued. “By the way, congratulations on your membership, Mr. Utsuro!” “Oh? You could have fooled me that I’m a member when I’m tied up like this!” Utsuro beamed. He actually was a bit weak from the strain of the tank and from the amount of blood taken out of him previously. “For some reason though I feel like you’re enjoying this, King Jebediah of Burei.” Jebediah softly placed his teacup and plate on the floor. “So you have heard of me? Though I wish I had heard of you sooner. Blimey, an individual actually born of Altana! Those are the legends young boys dream about before they’re even tall enough walk.” Jebediah strolled around the room with his hands folded together elegantly. “I heard you sold out your wife, children and entire planet to The Tendoshu and let them control it as they pleased. How much of it blew up when they got the chance? Half or more? The entire planet maybe?” Utsuro calmy sneered. Jebediah stopped pacing and looked back at him. He knew Utsuro was trying to jab him in weak spots, so he plastered a fake smile on. “Then we both have something in common! Selling out our homes for membership! But to answer your question, Mr. Utsuro. Despite the wonderful and generous efforts of a chap such as yourself, they STILL feel you are holding out on them. My words not theirs, mind you!” Jebediah replied. “What could a man who has given his very own blood possibly have left to offer?” He asked him. A few moments later Jebediah released the clamps from Utsuro’s hands and feet. Utsuro struggled from his weakness but got to his feet. He stood to face Jebediah who smiled. Jebediah handed him a Tendoshu cloak and helped him put it on. “I’ll have a word with them Mr. Utsuro, it isn’t polite to keep our new members strung about in such a gruesome barabic manner. You are free to go, I’m sure I’ll see you around.” Utsuro simply walked passed the man but stopped before he exited the room. “Jebediah.” He said and Jebediah curiously turned around and rested his fingers on his chin. “The Tendoshu have a stronger hold on you than even I.” Jebediah’s smile faded and his eyebrows furrowed he kept staring at Utsuro’s head as it turned outside the room. “So you gave the Tendoshu your blood in this universe too, sensei.” Oboro was resting in the cabin with his master, however this wasn’t a reality as he was still on Edo under the Naraku and Utsuro was on a ship back home going to Earth. Utsuro was communicating to him through a dream. Oboro took a bite of a cookie and laid back in the sofa across from Poe and Utsuro in his chair. “Only the green part.” Utsuro said. Oboro raised eyebrow. “Oboro, you and I are the only ones in this particular universe who understand that this is a comic book. The purple part of my blood from the crystal allows for an individual to leave the book or control even the outside world. In most ways it’s even more powerful than the green crystals. Even before Steve’s confession in the first universe I watched him and his brother grow up, I studied them.” Sensei looked at a photo of his wall with the little Steve and sunshiney baby Joe. “I understood they were from another world perhaps. I guess my obsession for knowledge became too strong, otherwise we wouldn’t be standing here with these powers.” Oboro was quite surprised, the man hadn’t told him all of these details before. “Do I have purple Altana? Were you born of it, Sensei?” A can of worms opened up in Oboro’s mind. “Unfortunately no Obo, I cannot trust that power to anyone, even my most faithful student.” Oboro looked a bit disheartened but understood. “I’m not sure about that second question! I feel I do posess it but,” Utsuro smiled and looked out the snowing window of the dream world. He thought of the dead sailor man who had washed up twice now in these two universes covered in purple liquid. He wondered who Steve and Joe’s parents were, but never met them at that point of history. “I guess one day I’ll understand. There is a lot out there in the real world that not even your teacher knows about.” Oboro and Poe cocked their heads. Utsuro smiled at them, gesturing at Oboro to continue eating his snack. The teacher then looked down at his teacup. “The only problem is, I may not be the only one curious enough to ask these questions.” He continued staring at the brown liquid inside of it. ——————- “Moshi moshi? Aah, Shin-chan! How are doing back at home?” Otae asked on the phone. She was in the ring with Enshou and King against the old men. “Are you kidding me?! Taking a call at a time like this?!” Gintoki shouted out at her. Enshou locked eyes with the bored looking Dragonia. Enshou menacingly smiled as he whipped out his pink sabers and ran towards the white devil. “Dragonia, it is time to repent for your SINS!!” But Elizabeth just tripped him with his foot and Enshou fell on his mascara covered face. He put the redheaded prince in a head lock and then gave him a wet willy. The other members of the tribe facepalmed. “COME ON!” Gintoki and Matako shouted at Otae. “How exciting! You can do it Otae-sama!” Tama gently clapped her hands together. “Come on Bro! Heckle those old timers for everything they got! Step on their faces and take out everything out of their wallets, those cheap geezer bastards! Pull their life support out of their aging wrinkly bodies!” Pirako smiled as Gintoki and Matako turned their heads to her with darken faces. “Hmm?” Otae looked up confused, putting away her cell phone. The Madao transformer robot squared up with her. Madao broke his serious face and smiled. “Hey Tae-san! Long time no-“ “RAAAAHHHHHHH!” The woman grabbed him by his robotic legs and swung him about in a circle. He cried out for mercy and was thrown high up into the air, crashing through the roof and outside of the dome. Otae smiled and brushed off her hands. “WINNER! Tae!” Kentsuno shouted. Gintoki and Matako’s expression darkened with horror. “AAHH! JONATHON!” Enshou was getting more childhood ‘nam flashbacks of his tough military stepdad as Dragonia was bending back the man’s leg now. “Hey your braided fool is somehow doing even worst than our midget.” Nobume flipped her shades down. Pirako turned to her and smiled with a vein popping out of her forehead. “AYY YA WANNA GO WITH A YAZUKA HOT STUFF?!” Pirako yelled and then Nobume got in her face. “YEAH MOTHER***ER YA WANNA MOTHERF**** GO? THIS COP TAKE YA OUT LIKE THE MOB TRASH YA ARE COME AT ME WIT THOSE LITTLE MOTHER***IN BRO HANDS OF YOURS BITCH.” She said as they bumped bodies. “AYY YOU TALKIN’ TRASH TO ME WHITE COAT? MY GANG WILL MESS YOU THE **** UP AND MAKE YA BLUE HAIRED ASS SLEEP WITH THE FISHES LIKE YESTERDAY’S HIT JOB, GET OUTTA HEARA!” Pirako spitted on her face as she talked. “YOU WANNA GO PRINCESS? YOU WANNA KISS PRINCESS? Woah, who said that woah.” Nobume backed up and put her hands up in defense. Shinsuke and Gintoki rolled their eyes and held the the girls back from each other to prevent further damage. “SWEETCH- I MEAN MINION, HELP ME!” Enshou screamed. King shrugged and simply pulled back his jacket revealing a katana. He put his hand on the sheath and in a millisecond flash, Dragonia and Musashi had flesh wounds on them and collapsed onto the floor. “Better eat while you still can...” Musashi passed out with his injured noodle tentacles. “NOOOOO! FATHER!” Katsura ran inside of the ring to hold his unconscious body. “Ooh, I call using his wrinkled corpse for my garden fertilizer!” Pirako smiled. “WHAT KIND OF FLOWER METAPHOR IS THAT?!” Gintoki and Matako thought in their heads. “3 KNOCK OUTS! KIBOU WINS IMMUNITY!” Ketsuno said and the robot audience cheered louder. The Yuuki tribe kicked the ground and swore. As Dragonia was rubbing his little owie, Enshou broke free of him and dashed ovef to King. “Way to go minion slave! I didn’t know that besides having the best taste of a person ever, you posessed god like swordsmanship, well second best to yours god truly.” Enshou patted the kid on his back. “Uhh, Enshou is great?” King said, nervously sweating. He then looked over at Pirako again, his expression worried for some reason. She simply smiled at him. “Kibou head back to camp, Yuuki head with me to the tribal council. But no idol immunity tonight. In honor of Hasegawa who was holding onto it, may his soul rest in peace.” Ketsuno pounded her chest, somewhere in the sky Hasegawa was soaring through the clouds with tears rolling down his cheeks. The Yukkis groaned as the Kibous all smirked as they left the soup kitchen dome. Back at camp, the Yuuki were all laying around their cabins. FDL, Monika and FDL evily stared at Shinsuke who was minding his own business sitting on a bed drinking some yakult. A confessional turned to Nobume. “That midget has it good for too long.” Another one turned to FDL. “The old man was probably gonna be my next choice but that one eyed emo is definitely it. At least the dude with the afro tried, that midget didn’t even pick up his weight. Who knows if he’d screw up next round. Jesus, this team is a mess, the closer to the merge the better.” It flipped to Enshou, “Can you believe Takasugi Shinsuke of the INFERIOR tribe? Acting like a scared little school child from washed up Oukoku...” He then looked all around, sweating. “D-Dragonia isn’t around is he?” He asked the camera men. It flipped to Monika, “Sorry Shinsuke but you gotta go! Hope we’re still on for a double date after this contest ends!” It turned to Saitou “Z.” He pulled out a Wanted poster with Shinsuke’s face on it. The screen shifts to Eren, “I could really tell all eyes were on Shinsuke after what happened in the ring with Tuesday Elizabeth. I can’t imagine voting him out after we made a ****in’ pact!” He exclaimed with his flippers. “Wait can swear on here? Cool!” Eren smiled. “Fumiko, babies, if you’re watching daddy ****ing loves you!” “Hey that’s us babies! Hi Erey!” Fumiko waved their television at home. The camera then cut to the tribal council. “Hey guys! How’s the tribe life?” They all groaned again. “Well since you all seem to be in a good mood like last week, we’ll cut to the point.” Everyone made their way to the voting booth, three confessionals on video tape. “While I do admire her as a fellow very competitive comrade, I predict she‘ll probably try to backstab most if not all of us soon.” “Daylight come and midget wanna go home.” “I know what you said.” Ketsuno talled the votes in the booth and then sat back down at the podium. She held up each of the giant placards one at a time. “One vote...Shinsuke.... Another vote...Nobume.. Three..Shinsuke. Four... FDL. Five..Shinsuke.. Six..Nobume.. Seven.. Stephen.” Eren crossed his arms and turned his face away from Stephen as the old man shrugged confused. Shinsuke dragged his hands down his face in agony and unwillingly got up next to the host. “Shinsuke, I’m afraid your time is up-“ Ketsuno was cut off as they all heard an odd noise coming from the starry night sky. They shooting star and it was unusually coming too close to them. They all braced for cover as it crash landed next to Ketsuno and Shinsuke. The smoke cleared as the star turned out to be a burnt up Hasegawa still holding the immunity idol he clung onto earlier. “Uhhhhhh.” Shinsuke took the idol out of the unconscious old man’s hands and held it up. “I play immunity!” “SHINSUKE IS SAFE!” Ketsuno exclaimed. “WHAT?!” The girls all said. Ketsuno then pointed to Nobume. “Pack your things Nobume, you are out of the competition!” “WHAAAATT?!” Nobume stood up and then lunge ran towards Shinsuke. She jumped on top of him and mauled his face off. “AAAAAHHHHH! GET HER OFFA ME!” He screamed. The camera men and producers had to physically tear them apart. Two carried Nobume away. “ISN’T OVER YOU LITTLE EMO BITCH! I’M COMIN’ TO PUNT YO ASS TO WHILADEPHIA! YOU TOO YOU DOUBLE CROSSING BLACK COAT BITCH!” Nobume pointed at Saitou. He sweated, looking around and whistled. Back at camp, King was in deep meditation and sitting outside, looking at the bright stars. “There’s no end to this charade huh?” He sighed and then pulled off the head part of his disguise off. “J-Jirochou-san?! The Jirochou?!” The camera men were shocked, ran up to him as he rubbed his old and tired face. “Believe me, the last thing I wanted to do is spending my free time here when I could have been watching it on TV.” He waved the camera men off but they continued to follow him. “J-Jirochou! If we could have a conf-“ In a flash, he threw his sword at them and they ducked to the floor. However the sword only landed a few inches away. “Since you camera hounds will keep bothering an old man. I guess it begun a few days ago- Since I’m retired, I was cleaning up the house, damn teenagers leaving stuff all over the place. So after I cleaned my room here I went to clean Pirako’s.” “Eh? That was your room?” One of the camera men asked confused. In a flash, Jirocho had picked up his sword and pointed it at the nervous man’s neck, he gulped. “Yazuka have no room for outdated sexism.” Jirochou resheathed it as fast as he had put it away, the camera man exhaled in relief. “Anyway. I was fishing in the Edo lake, however slimey gang dogs from all sorts of groups naturally as always were trying to taunt me.” “That looks more like local old dads then some yazuka!” The other camera man exclaimed. “So I did what any ravage beast would do in that situation, I used my quick wit.” Jirochou explained. “YEAH IT MORESO LOOKS LIKE YOU’RE LOSING THAT QUICK WIT!” The first camera man said. “And what does this have anything to do with why you’re in this contest?!” The other one exclaimed. The camera men then felt some liquid coming from their bodies, they looked down to see blood squirting out of their chests and they collasped to the floor. “Interviews are over, bros!” Smiling Pirako put her sword back and then stood in front of Jirocho. “Eh? You didn’t kill them right? ..I wouldn’t want to get disqualified after getting this far.” Jirochou morbidly but casually said. “When you hear the fuzz’s siren tune, make only a flesh wound! Just like you taught me, boss!” Pirako happily exclaimed. “Atta girl.” He patted her on the shoulder but she then went in for a hug around his waist, surprising him. “Jirobro! I knew it was you earlier, you can’t pass these Doromizu eyes.” Pirako nuzzled into his chest. “What are you doing here, you’ll break your old man bones in this freezing wearher!” “I may be old but I’m not infirm you little brat.” Jirocho then looked directly at Pirako, she looked up curious. “Piraky, you have to stay back. There is something going on with your old man that neither you and I don’t understand.” Jirochou took his daughter’s arms off of him and walked passed her. He pulled out a purple crystal from his jacket. “Damn this voice in my head, almost as loud and nagging as the ol’ geezer woman herself.” He smirked as he continued walking. “What voice?” Pirako overheard him. “What is that in your hand, Jirobro?” “Maybe I’m just going crazy Piraky, I don’t know really. I feel like something is in control of my actions, my moves. Even coming here under this disguise wasn’t my choice. Someone like me being controlled, it isn’t like this old timer know?” He stopped walking as he felt his daughter’s glare still at his back. “..Is that one of those Altana thingys we heard about on the news the other week?” She asked him. He had enough and dropped the item to the floor. “You know you’re right. And it’s gonna stay on just the news.” He almost stepped on the crystal but was met with sharp pain in his head, causing him to fall to the floor. “Jirochou!” Pikaro ran up to him and held him as he heard the voice in his head get louder. “Continue your mission, you old gangster git. Place the crystal underneath Prince Enshou’s bed. Or your daughter here will get a even worse shock to the head.” “Pikaro.. do this old man a favor. Under that weird caterpillar face’s bed in the cabin, place this crystal underneath it. I’ll be fine.” Jirochou mustered out, Pikaro looked confused but nodded. “O-Okay Jirobro..” She got up, took the crystal and ran back there. He rolled over on his back and looked at the starry skies once again. “Good show! I’ll contact again when I need you.” The voice disappeared from his mind and he laid there shaking his head at it all. He wondered how things were doing in the Kabuki district after all this previous war and how certain residents of the bars there were doing without their homes. Meanwhile Enshou was sound asleep, twitching rapidly again. The scene opens up to Lady TBC playing the piano in one of the fancy living rooms as BOD is waltzing with himself. Enshou slammed opened the doors with a tired expression across his face and baggy eyes could be seen. “Aah brother! You’re just in time!” BOD smiled and extended his hand for a dance. Lady TBC giggled but Enshou ignored them and walked by the man, slumping on the couch. BOD looked surprised but Lady TBC got up from the piano and massaged Enshou’s shoulders. “Hard day at the competition, dark overlord?” She asked. “Your limited pea brains wouldn’t know the half of it.” Enshou yawned. BOD then carefully approached the man. “You know what cheers me up when I’m down brother? A house party! Maybe we can invite that god frie-“ “Enough Doofus. Can’t you see I’m tired enough to fall asleep.” Enshou looked up at the painted marbel celing as Lady TBC was now rubbing his temples. The side of BOD’s smile was now rapidly twitching. “B-but you are asleep brother!” He exclaimed. “You ask me one more time you meat head and I’m dreaming you floating in space without an oxygen mask.” Enshou replied back. BOD was smiling bigger now as visual steam was coming off of him. “Come on husband, let’s leave our Evil Messiah to get some rest!” Lady TBC put his arm around his but he took it off. She looked surprised at this action. “Excuse my manners my Lady. But my darling, please leave this room. I must talk to my brother alone.” BOD calmly said. She still looked confused but obeyed, closing the door behind her. “I’m not in the mood for that either.” Enshou’s eyes were closed and his arms were crossed under his head. But then his eyes flicked open as he felt his throat being strangled now. “And I’m not in the mood to be a violent man, yet my boundaries keep being pushed brother! Mmm! Yes! So I’d call up that healer chap of yours, hmm?!” Jebediah tilted his head. “W-when did you get the sexy accent..” Enshou squeaked out from gullet, he was dropped on the floor. He pulled out his dream iWhone and begun dialing. “Yeah can I get uhhhhhh.” A fancy tea cup crashed next to his head and he rapidly changed the number to the correct one. Moments later the phone was glowing and then a large bolt of purple electricity popped a man out of it. “Did someone ring?” Suave’s smiled and it has a little twinkle on it. “Yeah sorry Best God Chode Chum, I’m beat tonight to do anything but my stupid dumbass brother wanted you here or something.” Enshou pointed behind him at the excited British man. Suave’s glassed fell to his nose. “J-J....JEBEDIAH?!” He exclaimed out. “Dreadful mistake!” Jebediah snapped his fingers and a large cage penetrated from the ground. It swallowed them inside of it and hung from where the chandelier once was. The former King of Burei elegantly paced around. “It’s funny, in the awake world, I had the universe at the tips of my fingers only limited by what any man loathes, his mortalty. But in the sleeping world, ooh those powers are greater than anyone could imagine!” “Man and people call ME egotistical.” Enshou rolled his eyes. Suave tried using his godly powers to bust them out but he was shocked as he could feel nothing. “W-what?” “Pitiful swine, limited by your purple Altana. Greens and purples, what is with you crystal breathers? I could never understand it!” Jebediah had his hands behind his back as usual. “If I was still in the Tendoshu I would simply commend you all to a slow death rather than invite you into it as fellow members.” Enshou’s eyes became bloodshot. “TENDOWHO?” He yelled. “NOW you have crossed the line brother! I DEMAND to be released or you will be punished, and not in the exciting way!” “Tell it to someone who cares, brother.” Jebediah snapped his fingers and adjusted his coat and ascot while whistling. “Let go of us at once Jebediah or I’ll-“ Suave was cut off. “Or you’ll what?” Jebediah made a humming scoff. “Mmm, you are the weakest link of the crystal breathers, my dear Mr. Suave. But don’t worry I won’t kill you, yet. You have to be on trial for you and your brothers crimes against holding back when the universe was reset! And I will be the glorious honor of justice judge. I bought the most lovely powdered wig for the occasion if I do say so myself Mhmhmm!” “Powdered wig? Gross.” Enshou leaned up against the cage. Jebediah brushed it off and started walking towards the living room door. “The purple crystal underneath my brother’s bed in the waking world prevents you from leaving and him from waking up. Now if you excuse me, I have matters to attend to in the Globberian Village.” He said as he left. Suave and Enshou sat there in silence for a while until Enshou spoke up. “Sex god, you think he’s mad at all the times I’ve banged his wife. Then again he once told me he’s into threeways.” Enshou continued pondering this as Suave just sighed and shook his head at his friend. Jebediah was still casually walking down the castle’s rooms when he snapped his fingers and a portal appeared. However someone stood at the other end of that hallway. “Husband!” Lady TBC ran up to him, holding up her dress to not trip. “What is going on? What is that?” Jebediah softly smiled at her and caressed her cheek between his fingers. “There are some things you do not understand, my precious dear. But I promise I’ll be back in time for brother to wake up from his rest in the other room.” He kissed her hand and departed into the portal, a somber look crossing his face as he departed for some reason. Something about her made Jebediah’s mind flashed to an image of his real wife and small children from centuries ago, the fires of Burei’s destruction, the screams of them and millions of others but he snapped out of it and played his favorite classical piece in his mind. “Huh?” Billy had suddenly dropped his chips on the poker table. He had a weird sensation come to him. “What’s wrong Bills?” Roberta asked. “Don’t tell me you’re rage quiting again.” “I can’t sense Suave anymore.” Billy held his head. “This isn’t good, the last time this happened your ass was causing damage to the universe.” He peeped at Roberta, she just gave a sheepish smile back. “What should we do, Billy-sama?” Gedomaru scooped up all his chips with her arms. “What the hell.. Ughh, according to my bro senses, his last appearance was somewhere in the dream world but I can’t reach there either.” Billy pounded the table. “Calm down chief, sure you’re just having an Altana brain fart?” Roberta put some of her chips down. “Real funny worm head but this is serious. I’d contact my big bro but rather not have to see that fish if I don’t have to.” Billy then made a weird smirk at her. “What?” She asked. “You want to gets some marks deducted off your permanent record here? Do a little errand for me.” He replied. “Oh no.. besides I’m no god. I can’t just enter dreams and all that shit. Uhh, can I?” Roberta wondered. “A soul can enter anywhere it wants if given the right directions, just like a lost tourist from out of State.” Gedomaru was counting out the chips and stacking them. “And puurrrrple voodoo magic.” Billy sarcastic twinkled his fingers in the air. “Fine. But I better be back before the next Wurvivor round.” Roberta rested her hand on her chin as Billy snapped his fingers. A purple portal appeared on the ceiling, swooping her up upside down into it. “Hey what’s the big idea doing it like this?!” She teleported to somewhere unknown. “Where did you send her?” Gedomaru asked. “Pfft, damn if I know. I barely had enough juice to even give her that trip.” Billy snagged some chips from her pile as they continued their game. “Hopefully she didn’t turn into cosmic space dust or w’ever. Or maybe she did, that would be cool with me.” Yuka was sound asleep in a calming recurring dream she had been having lately of the village on Globbus she grew in. She was in and out of having Sophia with her, trying to make sense of how she needed to gain independence in the real world somehow. In her somber but relaxed state, she didn’t even hear the sound of Jebediah’s portal opening up. TBC
  8. There was currently a mass gathering around the mountains outskirting Edo where citizens and others were lined up around it or at the base. They were eagerly awaiting to enter a certain village. “After three weeks of hard labor by everyone-“ Shigeshige looked at the mass crowd of humans, Hero Associationers, Globberians, Skolexians, Justaways, Oukoku, Renho, Bureians and others. “I, Shogun of Edo on November 25th, am happy to announce the grand reopening of Edo’s neighboring town, the Globberian Village!” Shige looked at Soyo pounting so he let her cut the ribbon on the town and the Globberians fled inside first. “AAHH, look Skels!” Valentino excitedly pointed to the large town hall. “Das where ALL da legal magic happens!” Valentino split from their body and grabbed Eren’s hand who was near by. “Haha I don’t know who you are but I’m already married you weird green goomba!” Eren smiled as the glob took him inside the building. “ERREEY!” Fumiko called out holding their baby triplets. The Hyakka cheered but Sonic shook his head. Gintoki casually slid up. “You know now that that chump in the duck suit is a no show-“ Gintoki proceeded to have ninja blades thrown at his body, Tsukki and Fumiko’s hitting him each in his two silver souls. “Hoh.. I think I just lost the contest.” Gintoki squeaked and then blacked out on the ground. “GIN-SAAAAAN!” Sacchan tackeled his unconscious body but she was momentarily was carried away by Sonic. Zenzou stared down at the perm head’s body before tearing up and getting ‘nam flashbacks. Sacchan looked up from this on Sonic’s shoulder as he was dragging her away and her face went dark. Shinpachi walked up to the scene and his face darkened as well. He looked up at the village and his expression went even more sinister. “WHAT THE, THIS ISN’T A VILLAGE, THIS IS MAFIA WROOKYLN!” Shinpachi yelled. “Ahahahahaha! Sweet digs around here, huh?” Tatsuma told them as him, Skele, Mutsu, Lt Simon, Oboro and the Takasugis looked all around them. Shinsuke crouched down at Gintoki and his pupil shrunk. Shinsuke made gasping noises and held up Gintoki’s idle head. “Ginny...” Shinsuke looked down at his fallen brother in arms. “S-Speak to me man....p-please..” “Oi..” Gintoki was coughing up blood that was mixed in red beans. “THAT’S JUST HIS STUPID ‘GINTOKI SPECIAL’ DESSERT OF HIS, AUTHOR!” Shinpachi yelled. “G-Ginny..” Shinsuke had tears forming in his good eye. “Shinny.. Don’t forget who I was. Before I die.. tell my employees...about their paychecks.. I.O.U....” Gintoki made a dying sound. “GINNNNNNNNYYYYYY!” Shinsuke’s tears streamed down his face. “WHY ARE YOU TWO ACTING LIKE THIS CONTEST IS LIFE OR DEATH? IS THAT THE ONLY THING IT TAKES YOU TO BE BUDDY BUDDY? AND YOU’RE CHEAP EVEN ON YOUR DEATH BED GIN-SAN!” Shinpachi barked “Oi, serves the old bastard right.” Kagura walked up eating some Globberian festive green kabob sticks with Soyo, Hata, Sougo and Nobume. They all walked away a moment later pretending they were cooler than the rest of everyone. Then an old man walked close to them all with his androids by his side. “Isn’t this village a beaut, kids?” Genghai put his hands on his hips and smiled. Tama happily nodded but Kintoki just arrogantly looked around. “Huh? Genghai-san, Tama-san, Kintoki-san? What brings you three here?” Shinpachi asked him. “Just marveling new life and new relations with species at work!” Genghai then pulled out a jar of blue glowing light. “What is that funny short guy?” Mikey scratched his lieutenant head. “Photonic energy my even funnier friend! Practically had this stuff laying everywhere around in my shop.” Genghai explained. “I just use it to fix simple electronical problems in my inventions but those Skolexians can’t get enough of it to consume! Easy to reproduce and easy to circulate. Their days of sucking humans brains out just might be over with.” “And we just might be rich if we sell them for a price. I can finally get that ab buffer I’ve wanted to long.” Kintoki was then slapped by Tama. Inside the town hall square, Eren powered up a super star and had enough energy fo dash away from the Italian Globberian. Valentino snapped his gooey fingers in defeat. He then slithered around the building, intaking the sights of the massive white structure. He found himself in front of his sister’s office and saw Chief Femurson standing by it. “Hey Fems, Ichiro.” Valentino nodded at the liquid inside of her. “Is sorella around?” He asked. Femurson sighed and nodded. Valentino understood what the woman meant, it had been three weeks since whirlwind. Yuka was attending the required events and caring her people in every way, but hadn’t spend any free time outside of her office. “I’ll knock for you.” Chief Femurson told him. “What is it Chiefs Femurson and Ichiro?” Yuka’s voice said from within. “Your godbrother wants to see you, your Majesty.” She replied. “Alright..” Yuka said. Valentino nodded at Femurson before entering inside. Valentino hadn’t had the chance to look at her new office much yet. It was dark inside from the almost completely closed blinds but he could see all the enormous amount of library from Globbus. They were neatly tucked away on the shelves behind her desk, which had a cup of freshly poured cup of brandy on top and an old timey telephone. He slithered up to the desk and took a seat across from it. Yuka swiveled around the chair to face him still in her liquid form. They smiled at each other despite their lacks of faces, or perhaps the siblings could tell each other was even without them. “Hey slick.” She joked, they both chuckled. “I knew ya had a room fit for a vintage loving egghead such as yaself, sorella!” Valentino leaned back in his chair, Yuka just shrugged the joke off for once, being in a content state of mind. “Now do I have to drag ya by your gooey head to come out and have some fun wit ya godbrotha ‘n everyone else?” Yuka shook her head. “I’m not going to the party fratello, I’m gonna go visit them on Globbus.” Yuka jumped down her chair and put on her gooey coat. “So.. ya have decided against morphin’ back with Sophia. Well, I could tell. It was your hard decision to make and I told mahself I’d stick by with whatevea you would choose to do.” Valentino said and Yuka sighed. “Fratello, when Sophia and I were permanently morphed together, it was against both our wills. How could I selfishly and disgustingly use her body just so I could keep my humanoid form?” Yuka said and then added. “Besides, her bones were too broken up. It’s time she finally got the proper burial she always deserved..” Valentino understood and let her slither by her before he gave her a big sibling hug. Yuka looked somber in his arms. “But it’s not just that fratello..” She quietely said. “Hmm?” He asked. “If there’s anything recent events has taught me, what Sophia has taught me.. is that I need to think for myself for once. I need to stop clinging onto others solely for happiness. I grieve unhealthily when problems arise and it destroys me as a person. I need to find the Yuka who’s at peace with herself, no matter how long that takes.” “Wow Yukes, that’s really deep, I’m beyond proud of ya to want to improve yaself. Just don’t get too lost in ya soul searchin’, aight? I expect yous to be back by seven sharp for dinna. Skels and I are makin’ ravoli.” Valentino said and Yuka chuckled a little. They split apart from each other and she headed for the door. “Do ya want me to go with yous, sorella?” “Next time, alright?” She smiled and slithered outside. “Femurson, Ichiro, I’m leaving for the rest of the afternoon to Globbus. Look after things while I’m away, alright?” “Sure thing your Majesty.” She replied. Valentino stood outside the door frame and leaned up against it. He held up the pocketbook of Sophia’s writing and poems that Yuka accidentally left behind on her desk. He read some of it, took it all in for a few moments until looking up and smiling. “Make sure to come back, both of my little sorellas.” He said. ————————- “I told you it wasn’t that bad.” “You know what, you were right! Somehow.” Barkas stretched his arms over his head and got his naked self out of the bed. Suddenly a chain saw could be heard and the door was cut down by an individual wearing a hockey mask. “Brother how could you do this to us?!” Big Oaf Doofus cried behind the mask. “HUH, Lady TBC was suppose to be watching the door!” Enshou woke up from his nappy time. He was sitting next to Barkas on one side and Eren and his family on the other. Hata and the terrorists were on the other seats in Oukoku’s chapel, they all gave him a disgusted look. They then turned their attention back to the event soon happening. “A wedding for the third time in a row in an arc? Isn’t that a bit cliche of the author?” Hata asked of me. He then hugged his ex-husband’s arm next to him as Bansai didn’t really care. “It might be Hata, but the person getting married this time will be quite the event to seen rolled out.” Barkas amusingly put his hands behind his head and leaned down into the chair. He briefly looked over at Enshou next to him, who had his tongue out and his smiling fangs showing. Barkas immediately sat back up and turned away. “Wow, Otsuu-chan sure is doing great in sales with her new manager.” Takechi was scrolling through his phone. “That’s David for you, won’t rest until he gets his singers to the top.” Bansai slightly smiled as Hata was still snuggling into his arm. He nodded to Kyuubei across the chairs who nodded smiled and back. Enshou could now be seen on the phone. “I agreed in this relationship that those are your children, Sweetcheeks and not mine. So whatever you choose to do with them is your thing and I don’t want a part of it.” Enshou’s eyes then went wide, perhaps ‘nam flashbacks of sounding like his own now dead military stepdad. He hung up the phone. “I promised I wouldn’t become my parents..” Big Oaf and Lady TBC inserted Chains of a Warrior in his head and he hummed to it. “Problem with the family?” Eren smiled sitting next to him. Enshou’s eyes narrowed. “Be quiet you white devil.” Enshou folded his arms and then peered down at gooing Palutena on her father’s lap. “You too, little braided hair white devil.” “Ga!” She smiled. Meanwhile in the back of the dressing room, the groom in question was being prepared for his big day. “I DON’T WANNA BE THE KING, OLD MAN.” Elizabeth was being forced to wear the traditional royal outfit as servants were measuring the garbs on his body. He scrunched his worriesome scruffy face, hating to be exposed without his costume and pry upon like this. “I don’t really care what you want, Dragonia. After your baka of a younger brother got divorced, the goons in our government begun breathing down my neck for some other royal buffon to get married. And that buffon happens to be you, unfortunately for me.” Jii took a puff of his cigarette. “Why not Barky?” Elizabeth asked. Him and the old man paused for a moment. They then broke out in hysterical laughter. “Haha..” Jii wiped a tear from his eye beneath his glasses. “Seriously though you little shit, you’re getting married.” “Well.. at least it’ll be to the woman I love.” Elizabeth pulled out a heart shaped locket of Sooyoung out of his jacket. “Yeah, about that. We had to improve relations with the planet since you fucked them up so badly with your little terrorist organization.” Jii kicked Dragonia out of the room with his foot. He fell to the floor then he looked up at the altar at the partner whom he was gonna wed to. “ELIZABETHHHHH!” Katsura called out from where he stood at the altar as the best man. “Who was that Toshi? I thought I was gonna be marrying Fake Otae-san!” Kondo whispered to his best man. Hijikata just facepalmed. ———— “Wow! What a cool leg, Josh!” The girl who Josh had been speaking to a few weeks ago exclaimed. He smiled as his classmates in Vegas were all standing around him as he showed off his new cyborg limb by rolling up his jeans leg a bit. Josh had been in the hospital for most of that time, but he was happy to be back on his college campus. Dylan walked up and took out a sharpie. He signed his name with a little heart at the end. “DYLAN! THIS ISN’T A CAST, IT’S MY LEG!” Josh pleaded out. Dylan then turned to the camera. “...Dylan knew at that moment he had messed up.” He said. He sheepishly took his assigned seat next to Josh as the school bell rung. “Settle down everyone!” The professor walked in the room and everyone scrambled to their chairs. He started writing on the chalkboard. “How did you even get your leg chopped off, Josh?” A male classmate whispered behind him. “He got it from a weird cursed book, Dylan will explain it all later.” Dylan whispered back at the man and turned his head back to face the board. Josh’s eye twiched. Meanwhile Steve and Joe were taking care of matters in their detective agency building after being mostly gone from it since Hangover. They were flooded with jobs, bills and foreclosure notices. They had been working for nonstop for the past three weeks to even try to catch up with not much prevail. “Guess those little funds Joshy gave us to get our heads out of the water didn’t go too far.” Joe was on the phone with an angry customer. “We need to take a comic book cleanse..” Steve pushed up the glasses on his nose as he was scribbling on endless amounts of sticky notes. “Steve, Joe, you have a customer here.” Their rarely paid secretary paged them through a speaker. “Well he’s gonna have to wait, Dolores. We’re already plenty busy here.” Steve was in the zone writing on the walls with his notes now. “He says its urgent.” She told them. “Fine, send him in.” Joe put his hand over the phone of his call. “Blue Prints Detective Agency, I have a ‘case’ for you.” The man joked as he opened the door. “Stephen!” The brothers happily looked up at the old man and got up from what they were doing. “I heard you two kids were having some money troubles.” Stephen put his sailor hat on the coat rack and walked up to them. “Awwh Steph, we don’t need hand outs.” Joe said. “Unless you really want to.. “Actually I had something else in mind!” Stephen pulled out a paper from jacket about some kind of contest (no not that one). Joe held it up for him and his brother and scratched his chin with his cyborg arm. “Looks like some recreational fun Captain, but we can’t just leave work again. We’re swamped.” Steve shrugged his hands up. “Gotta agree this time with the Steveinator. Aah but it looks so cool..” Joe looked longingly at all the events listed on it but shook his head. “No problem, you don’t have to. Me and Enshou already planned on entering it and winning.” Stephen said, the brothers made exasperated sighs and returned back to work. “What?” “Well Cap’n, we’re still not sure why you hang around someone like that guy.” Joe was dialing up the customer again. “Oh sure Enshou can be a handful with his egotistical personality, his psychotic tendencies, pathological lying, not to mention he can be slow on the draw sometimes in bed-“ Stephen put the side of hand to his mouth on that last one. “But he’s really not that bad once you get to know him.” “No, he’s worse.” Steve was scribbling on the walls again. “You know, I knew your parents long enough to tell when their kids with the same personalities are being full of it.” Stephen scoffed as he put his hands on his hips. “Mmm sure.” The siblings said as they were engrossed with their jobs. Stephen shook his head, put his hat back on and left them to their work. He closed the door behind him and then made a big smirk. “They really are like their parents.” ————————— Some hours later Oboro had invited the students over to Sensei’s cabin for some reason or the other. “Wow, from a grand reopening of a town to Lizzy’s wedding to this! I’d call this quite the busy day, wouldn’t you Shinny?” Zura held his husband’s hand to keep warm. “Man why did we get stuck following that Jizz Head.” Shinsuke said while trail walking through the freezing snow. Him, his husband, and Gintoki were in the back while Oboro, Mutsu, Tatsuma, Skele/Valentino and even surprisingly Nobume were in front laughing and having a fun conversation. The husbands and the permhead looked dumbfounded. “Boys, I think we’ve been finally outnumbered.” Gintoki told them. They reached the cabin, Oboro opened the door for the lot of them, blushing as Tatsuma entered inside. Nobume was the last one of the front group to enter. “GAYYYYY!!” Nobume pulled his hat over his head and ran inside. Oboro just shook it off. He went inside with Poe, not realizing the door slammed in the faces of Gintoki, Shinsuke and Zura. They stood there in disbelief. “This must be another universe..” Shinsuke slowly said. “Nope! It’s still the 22nd!” Oboro said as he opened up a window near by for some fresh air. Warm conversations and bright lights filled the air of the previously empty and cold cabin. They were sitting at the table or on the floor cozied up with pillows and blankets next to the roaring fire. “Remember the last time we were here, Honey?” Shinsuke and Zura were together in a blankie on the couch with some NWHS hot cocoa and cookies. Zura nodded his head. “You nearly took my head off for giving you CPR.” Katsura pouted as he looked down and stirred his steaming mug. Shinsuke leaned over and gave him a reassuring kiss on his cheek. Katsura made a little smile and kissed him back. “Man am I happy the author settled on using Hold On by Lennon-dono for the ost of this subplot.” Oboro said while sitting in a chair in the living room. “Caw..” Poe then whispered in his ear. “Phew whatta place to return to! Lemme tell yous somethin’ da last time I was here dames, I was either dyin’ or wakin’ up from a ‘terrible long sleep’.” Valentino was leaning up against the table as Mutsu and Nobume were standing there. Mutu made a little smile, maybe moreso for her boyfriend inside of the body while Nobume gave him a dead eye stare. “Yeesh, dis crowd ethuasism is almost as dry as sorella’s!” Tatsuma leaned up against Oboro’s rocking chair catching the white haired man off guard. The tradesman smiled looking at all his friends happy and together after such a long month. Oboro and him were there in silence for a few minutes enjoying the atmosphere. “You really did a lot for them, Obo.” Tatsuma spoke out in a calm tone for once. He looked Skele/Valentino who were still in the corner talking with the girls. Oboro blushed and grinned again. “No, they did it all on their own. I just used the tools he left over for me at this place.” Oboro said. Before he knew it, Tatsuma leaned over and gave him a hug. He sat there shocked but embraced it and put his arms around him before they parted a few moments later. Tatsuma messily rubbed his jizz hair and went over to talk to Gintoki on the couch. Poe flew over back to his chair with a marshmallow in his beak and just gave him a smug look. “I-I don’t know what that look means, Poe..” Oboro turned his head bashful. Gintoki was playing connect four with Tatsuma as his phone started to ring from Shinpachi’s line and he picked it up. “Hey Mr. Yorozuya your house blew up!” Hata exclaimed from the other line. “Danna, I’d consider moving if I was you. The wreckage is pretty bad from the impact of the war. Plus you have some pretty old and scary coackroaches here.” Sougo had the phone now. “I’LL SHOW YOU WHO’S SCARY OLD COCKROACH YOU LITTLE COCONUT HEADED TWERP.” Catherine said as the sound of a firefighting truck could be heard now. “GINTOKI, YOU BETTER HAVE THIS ALL FIXED BEFORE YOU EVEN DARE TO COME BACK!” Otose grabbed the phone from Sougo’s hand. “And bring some pickled seaweed, uh-huh!” Kagura exclaimed as she was standing next to Otose. “Ooh! And the latest EP from Exploding Feminism for their reunion tour!” Soyo beamed as Hata agreed. “OI, GET OFF MY PHONE EVERYONE!!” Shinpachi could be heard yelling in the background and snatched it away. “Gin-san..?” Gintoki proceeded to faint onto the floor clutching the phone in his hand still. “NOT AGAIN!” Shinny got up from the couch and held up the fallen soldiers head as Shinsuke looked up at the ceiling. “GINNNNNNNY!!” “Hmmm. Gintoki’s phone is making a dial tone and yet I hear vibration.” Katsura said and then deeply blushed. “Wait, I’m not carrying that today.” He pulled out his phone from his pocket to see Eren was calling him. He pressed the speaker button on. “KATSURA! FLIP ON YOUR TV ONTO CHANNEL 6! GAME SHOW CONTEST! MILLION DOLLAR PRIZE! WE NEED TO SIGN UP NOW!” Eren was exclaiming this in a hurry. Oboro dusted off the remote and turned on the living room television. “Isss dat who I think it is on da otha line?” Valentino had split from Skele and dashed into the room but Eren quickly hung up. The TV flashed a festive ad for a special event coming to Edo. “Grand prize of a m-million smackeroonies..?” Gintoki awoke and sat up. “This Sunday Sunday Sunday...?” Shinsuke was very curious too now. Gintoki’s eyes then physically changed to dollar signs and his mind drifted into a blissful wonderland. But it was momentarily broken by a midget. “What’s with the daydream? Who says you’ll win diabetic breath lookin’ ass?” Shinsuke crossed his arms. “I just might enter it with my own crew.” “Are you freaking kidding me? What could you possibly need a million dollars for? You’re already ridiculously rich from that stupid band you steal money from.” Gintoki said. “I happen to need money for all sorts of things Gintoki.” Shinsuke turned his head the other way. “Yeah for like what? That disgusting milk drink of yours or steroids to grow taller?” Gintoki asked and Shinsuke furrowed his eyebrows. The two started to loudly argue as Tatsuma and Katsura found some CheeseHead rerun to watch on the TV. Meanwhile, Skele and Mutsu were sitting alone on the porch as the others inside were setting up plans for the game show. The couple sat there in silence, some inches away from each other. They looked at the snow covered mountains and the delicate snowflakes swaying to the ground. “C-crazy couple of weeks huh?” Skele asked her, she was flustered and nodded. She was trying to warm her hands up in her lap. “I’m so happy everything worked out after everything that happened with you and your kind and your solid.” Mutsu looked up and smiled. The wind was starting to pick up more, creating a hollowing sound and it got slightly colder. Skele inched a bit closer to her, Mutsu picking it up and doing the same. They once again stared at the snowy caps until Skele held her hand with his boney one. She turned his head to him and then he kissed her on the mouth for the first time by himself. Their lips parted, both stunned. They nervously chuckled a little bit and held hands again. “I-I think Oboro wanted to do some group picture soon!” Skele exclaimed. Mutsu looked up at him. “Well, he can wait a few more minutes.” Mutsu clasped her arms around Skele’s and leaned against it. Skele blushed and smiled. Once the group was together, they all huddled in around outside the cabin. “Say pasta molto di formaggio!” Valentino adjusted the camera with his gooey arms and quickly morphed back with Skele to get in the shot. “Poe... this is the best day of my life.” Oboro said and the photo was snapped of all of them. ———— Roberta was sitting on the side of the highway to hell picking up trash with grappling tool with a full trash bag slinged on her shoulder. She spontaneously put it down and walked into traffic, she was about to get hit when a strong hand grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back onto the side road. She turned around, surprised that someone caught her and saw who it was. “Wormy mommy, why are you trying to kill yourself? You know you’ll just respawn.” Gedomaru said and held up her favorite cowskull, Roberta just smirked a little. “Eh, I know that. Was just kind of bored.” Roberta then sat down on the hot pebble covered ground and tossed off her construction helmet. Gedomaru sat down next to her. Roberta gestured for her to sit in her lap. “Woah, how did you get that cool face scar?” Gedomaru was impressed, a rare thing for her. “Hah, for a second there Geddy you sounded the adults on Skolex, they always said I had a dirty orphan face.” Robert jokingly rubbed her head. “Well, Bills says it’s from all the coming back to life I was doing. Souls aren’t meant to be ripped out of the body more than once. Says my ass was lucky, one more time and my soul probably would’ve-“ Roberta made an exploding noise with her mouth and Gedomaru tilted her head. “You know, makes me wonder if that happened to that original universe resetter and why I never never saw him down here.” Roberta petted the Yoshi skull in the kid’s lap. “And yet you still decided to get hit by a car knowing all of this?” The girl asked. “Thought I’d test out old Bill geezer’s theory.” Roberta chuckled a little as did Gedomaru. The two stared at the speeding spirit vehicles traveling for some reason to some location. The sky was becoming a more darker orange haze than it already was that entire day in the underworld. Roberta let out a little sigh, Gedo turned her head up at her. “Is something the matter Wormy Mommy?” She asked. “You wouldn’t understand, kid.” Roberta replied. “I’m three hundred million years old, try me.” Gedomaru smiled. “You ever reflect back on your life and realized how shit it really was? How controlled it was? But it’s funny, I feel like my own stubborness and blindness was my entire life was worse than anything those freaks in the strawhats couldn’ve schemed up. Truly was my own worst enemy, huh?” Roberta continued to stare at the road ahead. She felt on a place on her construction vest where a photo once was kept inside of. “But I’ve seen you say you regret doing things before when you’ve come back down here, Mommy. And yet you come back to life, mess it up again and come back down here again.” Gedomaru bluntly told her but Roberta couldn’t do anything but chuckle a little. “Guess that’s the fault of being an adult. Never grow up, alright kid?” Roberta smiled, she kissed the top of Gedo’s head and rested her chin there. “That would take another billion years anyway.” Gedomaru started braiding the skull’s blonde hair. Roberta heard the sound of rustling pebbles and looked up. “Hey big guy, I see behind that burnt tree, come over here!” She urged him. Ungyou took a seat next to the two girls. “Ungyou-sama’s been really missing you. He wouldn’t shut up about it!” Gedomaru tied the skull’s braids back with ribbons. “Can’t believe you of all people would go soft on me at a time like this, Headster.” Roberta smirked, Ungyou just kept looking ahead, the tear still visible on his cheek. They then heard another man walking up, he put his hands on his hips. “I come in from a long day of tutorin’ shitheads only to see my poker table completely abandoned for the first time in centuries.” Billy then noticed Roberta, she just blinked boredly. “HEY! You two aren’t suppose to be interacting with the slime, she still has like a trillion years of serving time to finish.” “Shut up I like her better than you you 8 billion year old boomer.” Gedomaru buried her head in Roberta. Billy scrunched his face in annoyance. “There’s no way your ass traveled all the way to the other side of hell just to get pissed at these kids, Bills.” Roberta said to him. “Who says I need a reason to boss my subordinates around?” Billy asked the woman, he took a seat next to Ungyou and looked at his face, stunned. “Is that a.. tear? Anyway, I had some news your curly haired ass might perk up about. Turns out that jizz head Oboro went behind our backs and did some resurrecting on his own, perhaps a gooey friend of yours?” At this Roberta’s pupil’s shrunk, she took Gedomaru off her lap. Roberta held her head to the ground while covering her mouth. “Valentino.. Oh.. I-I can’t believe it.. That’s the best news I’ve ever heard..” Roberta wiped away the stream of tears pouring from her face. Gedomaru and Ungyou rubbed her back. “Yeah I can’t believe I even let you know after the mess you caused this time.” Billy weighed his hands and arms behind his body and Gedomaru scowled at him. Billy then sighed. “Buuut, I would be pulling your wormy leg if I told you that was the only reason I came here.” Roberta looked up wiping away more tears. “Let me ask you, Robes. What did you plan to do once you entered that little universe portal?” “I don’t know... Undo the universe to save him.. Why are you testing me, you already knew that, Bills.” She said. “Come on. You cause the greatest dimensional rift in the history of time, at least play the villainous part. You’re hated by everyone in the universe, even more than Utsuro in some ways!” Billy replied back. Roberta stared at the ground with a sombersome face. “...I’ve always been hated for stupid shit I pull..I know that..” She said. “But hated for good reason..” “And yet what’s this I hear about you sacrificing your life to save some guy you killed before and his sister? And then giving instructions to your enemies to fix the universe to save your people and everyone else? Not the villianious conclusion I expected of this at all. You fuck things up to badly that you fuck up being bad too.” Roberta looked at him with a confused but teary little smile. “At least she didn’t eat her own brother.” Gedomaru crossed her arms at Billy, he just gave her a classic Billy look back. “What are you trying to say Bills..” Roberta said. “Look, I’m not saying much at all, Robes.” Billy then got up from the floor and dusted his flannel shirt and faded jeans off. “I’m just relaying a message from the bozos up there in the pearly gates. They don’t want to see a good heart and potential go to waste. Says they already gave one good for nothin’ freeloader who was stuck in Hell another chance, why not another freeloader?” Roberta looked surprised and then smiled. “What about Hitsugi..? I would think more than anyone he deserves a second chance.” Roberta tried to reason. “O-Or what about Yuka’s solid, Sophia..” “That Big Man is reunited with his family up there, he’s good. I don’t know about the second one, my brothers aren’t ones to negotiate souls, that’s their turf up there.” Billy commented. “But, they are looking for some some dumb and disgusting worms to mold into their terrible fishy image.” ’I’ll make sure I tell them I said thank you.” She replied and got up along with the other two. “Don’t act like I’m not still pissed at you you shithead caterpillar. My bros might give you a chance at parole work in the land of the living ONE day but the den is still off limits to your cheating kind. I’m talking about NO more games to get out of Hell either. No cheating, no short cuts, no scheming bullshittery. You want to earn everyone’s trust again? You do the dirty work like the dirt worm you are.” Billy started walking away, totally not gesturing with his head for the three of them to follow back to their clubhouse. Roberta tossed off her construction vest and started walking. “Me? Cheating at Go? Awh come on Bills!” Roberta put her hands up and a bunch of cards accidentally fell out, she rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. ——————————— “That was fun! So when do you think our Overlord Prince of Wonderfulness is coming back to play more games, husband?” Lady TBC asked. “Soon I hope, Lady TBC! Brother is never late to after arc celebrations!” Big Oaf Doofus gleamed as he held his wife’s hands eagerly. “Maybe if we hold our breath he’ll show up sooner!” “Haha yeah! Like the time we were all stuck in the jungle and he let us die but he brought us back with the kiss of life! What a hero!” Lady TBC exclaimed. “I loved that part! Especially the kiss!” Big Oaf Doofus excitedly said. As they were talking, an individual had appeared in the window overlooking the kingdom. “Jebediah-dono.” They both turned around in an instant. “Husband.. who is thi-“ Big Oaf Doofus snapped his fingers and she disappeared back into nothingness. He snapped his fingers again and changed his outfit. “Mr. Jazzy, what do I bestow in the honor of your arrival? Come! Sit, please.” The redheaded man said with a British accent and then snapped his fingers. The table of the living room had a cloth levitated over it along with silverware and plates. Jazzy cautiously walked inside the window and sat across from him. “So this is where you’re living in this universe, Jebediah-dono.. escaping from one dream world to the other as always.” Jazzy folded the napkin on his lap ever so elegantly. “I thought I learned a trick or two from you gentlemen by coming into fascinating places such as this.” Jebediah opened up the tin lid of the entry plate and appeared a steaming fish head. Jazzy jolted his head back. “Woops! Apologies! You know dreams, always reading your mind. So tell me, what’s on yours, Mr. Jazzy? To interupt a man privately celebrating with his wife, that’s some rude manners coming from a fellow polite individual such as yourself.” “It took me ages to find out your new location, Jebediah-dono since you change it so frequently.” Jazzy then crossed his arms but didn’t put them on the table because that would be bad manners. “Someone was dreaming back when Edo was being restored to its normal self, I sensed you were the one inside of it.” “Eccentric odd fellow, this braided hair chap is, isn’t he? No wonder he couldn’t save his own planet from its demise, his head was stuck in the clouds, or fantasy castles might I say.” Jebediah chuckled and pointed his finger at their empty wine cups. They had wine poured in them by theirselves. “This Skolexian though.. what was her name... Aah! Miss Roberta. What a big deal she was. My! Almost unraveled all the universes themselves!” “That isn’t a thing to be proud of, Jebediah.” Jazzy took a light sip of his wine. “Well Utsuro would have been proud. Well almost as proud as he was of me, his crown jewel on top of his golden crown of decieving. She was so close though.” At this Jazzy narrowed his eyes. “Utsuro would have been upset, just as much as he was when you forced him to reset the second universe.” Jazzy said, Jebediah looked up from his glass of wine and set it down on a coaster, dabbing his mouth with his napkin. “I accomplished in that universe what those strawhats could ever dream of, including their member Utsuro. Too bad they wouldn’t remember the name of Tendoshu Leader, Lord Jebediah. So I’m stuck as a Big Oaf Doofus.” He placed the napkin inside the top of his shirt and used his fork and knife to cut through the fishhead. Jazzy gagged a little bit but continued his scolding. “You are an evil tyrant who betrayed his country when it was attacked by the Tendoshu and decided to join forces with them to slaughter the people he once protected along with many more worlds.” Jazzy gave him a look of disgust. “Aah, t’was ancient centuries ago.” Jebediah took a small bite of the fish, savoring every chew for flavor and for spite of his guest. “And yet you bring it up like it was yesterday’s discussion at the Gentlemen’s club.” “Centuries ago to a man who has avoided all forms of punishment and resets.” Jazzy replied. At this Jebediah’s eyes narrowed and he put down his carving fork and knife. “Tell me Mr. Jazzy, what happens when a universe is reset, where does the soul of that universe go?” Jebediah put his elbows on the table and locked his hands, resting his head on them. ”It’s erased and recycled into the new universe with their new selves.” Jazzy replied. “And IF said person never existed in other universes? Would he have a new and recycled soul? Hmm?” Jebediah said with a twinge of sarcasm. “No, he wouldn’t ever existed. You know we’ve had this discussion before Jebediah-dono and you know my stance.” Jazzy narrowed his own eyes. “Oh it’s bad enough the poor chap has to be reset like some damn cold machine, but then he wouldn’t have ever existed..” Jebediah looked him straight into the eyes now. “You could have easily put a stop to him resetting universes and yet you chose to stand by idle as he did so and wiped out trillions of lives. Why did you choose that, mmm?” “This is all coming from a man who wiped out countless lives himself.” Jazzy replied. “You shouldn’t even exist.” At this, Jebediah shot up from the table, knocking over his wine class and it clanked against his china plate. “You won’t answer my question because you are inferior..” He threw down his napkin on the table. “You are purple altana creatures who cannot even stand up to a man who was born with both crystals like Utsuro. WHO ARE YOU TO SAY WHO EXISTS AND WHO DOESN’T YOU SPINELESS WEAKLINGS?! WHO IS BILLY TO TRY TO ERASE ME AND MY RIGHT TO LIVE?!” Jebediah exhaled after some moments and straightened up his ascot. He sat back down. “...Sorry lost my temper there. Aah, I hate becoming ruffled up, its unbecoming to a Lord like me. That drasted Ungyo chap.. I trusted he would understand being given a second chance to live as well! I guess not. Your brother William always showed him favorites allowing him to remain there despite resets.” “I’ll soon be leaving, if you want to repeat the same conversations.” Jazzy simply replied. “You don’t need to side step the reason you came here, Mr. Jazzy. If you wanted to know where the Tendoshu currently are, I could take a good guess.” Jebediah said. “No, I don’t need any advice from you. I wanted to say we’re watching you, you haven’t caused any trouble in these other universes but with recent events you could pose as a threat. You never once repented for your acts of bloodshed, you’re unlike any other evil person I’ve met.” Jazzy folded his napkin on the table and stood up to go. “Mmm, me leave and miss out at tea time with the wife? I don’t think so. I’m not a violent man Mr. Jazzy, unless I am provoked. And I really do not want to be forced to reach that point.” Jebediah was having the table clean itself from the wine spill. “Besides, she’s making lovely tuna finger sandwiches soon! You’ll have to try one sometime. Oop, my apologies! I must’ve forgotten you were a cod.” He made a little smile. “I’m a Jade Tiger Fish.” Jazzy exited the living room before he was excused from the table for the first time of his life. The lord poured himself a new glass and took another sip when suddenly he heard more footsteps. He snapped his fingers, causing the fancy dining table and his clothes and accent to return to normal. He stood there and greeted his “brother”. “Big Oaf Doofus! What a terrible mess of a wedding that was. Stupid mean bullying Dragonia didn’t even take the time to hear my taunts and insults to him as he fled out of his stupid wedding chapel.” Enshou fell on the couch, sprawled about and put feet up on the arm. He tried taking his boots off with his other foot but had trouble. BOD got down and helped him out. “I’m sorry to hear that brother, I’m sure him and all other white devils will fall to your glorious leathered black sexy boot self soon enough.” Big Doofus stood up again. “Where is my Lady TBC, brother? I was gonna take the rest of my rage out on her beautiful sadly not gooey skin.” Enshou looked upside down at the man. “Uhh not sure! She must have vanished again after we played Dark Overlord Enshou steals Princess Lady TBC from her idiot husband for the 506th time this month!” BOD happily exclaimed. “WHAT?! That’s the fourth time this week!” Enshou turned right side up on the couch and frustratedly snapped his fingers. She appeared again, confused and dazed. “Big Ham Fatty, it’s almost if some goon is in control of my glorious fantasy world!” “Never, brother! No one could match your intellect!” Big Oaf strolled by the mantle, he wiped a finger across the dash and looked at the dust on his finger. “Hey, so.. you wouldn’t be happen to see that saxophone god friend of yours soon again would you?” Enshou’s eyes narrowed. “Why would you of all people in the world be concerned with something like that?” Enshou stared at the man. “Because.. he could bask in your glory?” BOD said. “Why didn’t I think of that? Oh wait I did!” Enshou put his hand on his shoulder. “Come now brother, we must prepare to see him again. “Yes brother!” Big Oaf Doofus plastered a big happy smile across his face and followed Enshou into the other room. Meanwhile as Roberta was heading back to the mancave, Gedomaru holding her right hand, Ungyou holding her left with the tear still on his face and Billy stroking his hands through his messy hair in front of the line, Roberta’s mind was drifting in and out of thoughts of the distant past and her time on Earth. She briefly let go of Ungyou’s hand and pretended to pull out something from her shirt. She twirled the imaginary item in between her fingers. TBC
  9. Skele and Roberta stared at each other in a dead eye lock for a few moments. But every second of them felt dreadfully long. Suddenly, Roberta broke out first, she changed back into her worm form and charged Skele. He clung against the walls and narrow steps tightly as she charged against him, moving in the nick of time and avoiding the steep fall into a sudden death by the Altana core several feet below them. He had to think fast, any move from this woman could be his last. “I don’t know what you feel like you’ll gain from stopping me, solid.” She spoke out while as a worm, her voice having a screeching sound to it that rattled Skele’s bones. “I’m not gonna let you destroy Earth and the universe that I have spent my entire life protecting, Roberta!” Skele was on the opposite end of the terminal from her but drew out his sword for her to strike again. She tried coming at him again with bites, he dodged some and managed to slash the top of her face up a bit. She hit him really hard the next time but he slipped out of the way and she slammed into the metal wall, causing it to dent out. But this was only a distraction to the skeleton’s attention as she went next time to headbutt the stairs out of the wall. Skele jumped into the circular dent in the wall as he stared at the falling stairs finally reaching the green glowing core and disintegrate on impact. But his fixation in a millisecond snapped to Roberta slapping her tail at him as he held it back with his all the might of his sword. They broke this stance only for a second before Roberta picked up Skele quicker before he could slash it at her. She coiled her tail around him like a cobra and stared him in the face. Roberta made a loud screeching as she unlatched her jaw revealing rows of dark sharp pointy teeth covered in drool. She slowly descended Skele inside but he managed to wiggle his upward sword from his restrained arms. His right arm loosened from her slimey grasp and right before he entered inside, he stuck the sword into her gums, causing a barrier in her mouth. Roberta winced in pain as she could not physically move it out with her slimey tongue. Skele took this distracted opportunity to ease his slender body through her grip. He landed and stumbled for a moment as he almost fell over the tight steps. He wiped the sweat from his skully head. “Man, whoever built this terminal definitely didn’t make it for comfort!” He exclaimed. He saw in that moment as Roberta finally managed to pry his sword from her jaw, the stabbed hole in the guns bleeding out her mouth with black liquid. She flung the sword down into the Altana abyss as Skele gasped as he watched it disintegrate. Roberta just smirked. Meanwhile on the other side of Edo in its castle, a redhead bursted through the doors of the royals. They all turned around. “Hey who let that platonically handsome man through these doors?!” Nobunobu pointed his hand that wasn’t still shaking Barkas’s at Enshou but the man ignored everyone. “W-what the hell?!” Barkas said as Enshou grabbed his free hand and snatched him away. Everyone mostly just shrugging and returning to the events going on outside the window. “Big brother!” Hata called out. Enshou was still holding Barkas’s hand as they were running through the streets. Enshou saw a worm coming at them and broke free of Shijaku, using his laser swords to hack it up. “What did you want, Enshou? I was in the middle of very important royal transition.” Barkas said from down below but Enshou just gave him a look. “Oops.” Barkas got out his own sword and helped the prince out. “Shijaku, I managed to get in contact with all of our Liberation Army allies and told them about the situation on Earth- HIYYAH!” Enshou spun in in the air with the ends of his sabers touching and to slash down another like General Wrievous. “Really?!” Barkas’s face changed to an excited expression, he grinned as he jumped up in the air and stabbed the worm in the heart. “Buuuuut all of them declined. Said the ‘Tendoshu was destroyed at Koukan’. THE IGNORANT FOOLS!” Enshou hacked off the Skolexian’s head, this time stealing some moves from Darth Waul. But Stupid Idiot Barkas didn’t pay any attention to his wicked cool possible sexy boyfriend’s moves. I was forced to write that last sentence by two pink sabers at my back. “Oh great.. we’re all alone then as the universe gets destroyed.” Barkas said in a monotone. “Except one ally agreed on the offer!” Enshou pointed to the snowy distance with his sabers to some odd looking red tanks. “That.. that looks like my brother’s..” Barkas was dumbfounded and his eye rapidly twitched at the stupidness as the tanks came closer. The Justaway Tanks begun launching missiles at the worms, destroying them on impact. Another worm was coming towards a distracted Barkas staring at the needing to be censored tanks. “GET DOWN!” Enshou pushed him out of the way. they fell on the side of the street on top of each other. “It’s funny Shijaku how we’re once again about to end up having sex.” “GET OFF!!!” Barkas yelled and kicked the redhead away. Enshou passed out upon impact with the ground for no reason and laid there in his imaginary dream world. “Don’t worry my Dark Overlord of Wickness! You’ll manage to win Shijaku’s heart and crotch one of these days!” Lady TBC reassured her king. “The heart of my crotch pulses for you, brother!” Big Oaf Doofus chimed in. Meanwhile back at the castle, everyone was watching the dazzling displays of the shots coming from the Justaway jet armstrongs. A frowning Hata was sitting with his pudgy knees drawn up to his chest as Sougo watched from a distance. “Big brother..” He kept saying. Sougo rubbed the back of his head and finally walked over to the bubblegum prince. Hata looked up, his eyes running with rainbow colored mascara. “Hey I just wanted to tell you..uhh.” Sougo looked around and finally sighed out. “That it’s gonna be okay.” Hata gasped. “Thank you that’s so sweet!” He pulled down the cop in for a soft bear hug Sougo couldn’t escape from. Sadaharu was anxiously moving in his sleep, causing the distracted lot leaning up against him to sway around. “Arf!” He shot up from the floor and broke away from everyone. Kagura turned her attention to her dog as he begun bolting out of the castle. “Sadaharu!! Where are you going?” Kagura called out she started running after him. “Kagura-chan!” Soyo exclaimed worried as she watched her best friend leave. “This is not good.” Shinsuke was pacing around outside of the Snack Shop with Shinpachi and as Gintoki was using the payphone for a very important call. “All the roads are block from this point, I can’t reach Honey or the rest of my crew.” “Yeah can I get a beefy queefy burrit-“ Shinsuke and Shinpachi smashed the booth’s glass in synchronization with their feet. Sadaharu came running up to them with Kagura on his back and two other people. “NOT MORE BRAIDED HAIR PEOPLE!” Shinsuke hid behind Shinpachi as he smiled at the two individuals he saw. “Ane-san! Mone-san!” Shinpachi exclaimed. “Actually I’m Ane, my sister is Mone.” She said while petting her own small white dog Komako. “We’re gonna control the Altana mahthingy mabob from overflowing! Gin-san get your smelly motorcycle and follow us!” Kagura exclaimed. Gintoki sluggishly obeyed and pulled it out of his apartment above. He revved it up and all of them bolted through rural areas to downtown Edo. “We’re getting close up there! Prepare for all the Skolexians everyone!” Mone told the trio on the motorcycle behind. “Aw man why am I on the back of Gintoki.” Shinsuke whined. “I don’t want him to feel my crotch up against him.” Dead eyes Gintoki then purposefully leaned his bike to the side to shake him off, as Shinsuke was loudly yelling. “OI KNOCK IT OFF YOU TWO!!” Shinpachi barked and the motorcycle went back to normal. “Hey isn’t this just a rip-off of the Silver Soul arc anyway? I mean the Altana core of Earth breaching, inugami, Tendoshu and the Altana Liberation?” Shinpachi asked. “The whomstveberation.” Gintoki said and clicked the speaker on his bike to play Lowrider as Shinpachi’s face darkened once again. In the heart of Edo, the Kaientai and Kiheitai/Jouishishi along with the Justaways fought side by side against the Skolexians. Having both ships come in contact sometime earlier that day after witnessing the city wide destruction. Luckily for the terrorists, the cops and heroes were too busy fleeing out citizens out of Edo and other areas to take notice of them. “Ahahaha! Look at all these worms, our men and Justaways go! Eh, Mutsu? Lt? Mr. Takasugi?” Tatsuma was shooting rounds at one with all three of the others covering each other’s backs. “Mr. Takasugi jana- Wait no. That’s actually correct.” Katsura smiled and crossed his arms. As one came screeching up in his face, he grabbed it by its sides. “Aww who’s a cute wittle wormy permy larmy?” Katsura’s head was then engulfed in the creature as he screamed out for help. “Don’t worry Captain Takasugi I got ya!” Mikey tried heaving the terrorist out of its jaw with no luck. “Captain Takasugi jana- no wait. That’s correct too.” Katsura said as his head was visibly bleeding inside of it. “DON’T WORRY WE GOT YA SUGI BOY! HAHAHA!” Tatsuma grabbed hold of Mikey and pulled backward as well. “Sugi Boy JANAI Katsura da! No wait, Takasugi da! Katsura. No. Takasugi! No. Katsura!” The worm even was looking at them in confusion and scratched his head with his tail. “I really wonder which idiot will die first...” Mutsu said in a monotone. As they were fighting, they saw Sadaharu with the priestess sisters, Yorozuya and Shinsuke running past the mix crowds of Amanto. “HOOOONNEY!” Shinsuke saw his husband’s head stuck inside a worm and dove off the speeding motorcycle painfully landing on his bottom. “Haha midget!” Kagura exclaimed out. “We’ll catch you all later!” Ane told them. Shinsuke pushed Tatsuma and Mikey out of the way and tried pulling Katsura out himself. Mutsu shook her head as she walked over and opened the jaw with ease. She pulled out Zura drenched in black spit. “M-my hero..” Katsura sniffled and jumped into Shinsuke’s arms. The yato sighed out annoyed. The rest of the terrorist mains were fighting close by. -My warrior princess, reunited with me once again..- Elizabeth had tears in his eyes as he fought side by side with Sooyoung. -If we survive this, I-I want to marry you.- Elizabeth’s covered his mouth. “Oooh can’t back now!” Matako and Takechi called out from where her and not him were fighting. -W-Wait no. That would ruin the status quo of our group!- Elizabeth shook his sign and then proceeded to hit a worm with it. -NOOOOOOO NOT THE WOOGLE DOC- Elizabeth sign screamed. Sooyoung just looked at him blank face as always and he sweatdropped in embarrassment of this outburst. -I mean.. i-if you wanted to.- As the bandmates were fighting, three more worms race up to them catching them off guard. They dropped to the floor prepared for the worst when suddenly they saw nearly visible string wrap around the worms heads and with a loud strung, they sliced off, spewing black goo everywhere. When the bodies fell over they saw a single man standing there. “Room for some stupid dude who did their friends more dirty than these slimey pesks?” Matako, Elizabeth and Takechi looked at each other for one serious moment before they all grabbed Bansai’s wrist and flung him in a big puddle of black goo. He was annoyed for one second before laughing it off with them. He scrambled to his feet and joined his reunited friends in battle. “Hey stupid, you were just in time! Guess what? Lizzy’s getting married this round!” Matako exclaimed. -NO I’M NOT!- Elizabeth snapped. “Congrats dude!” Bansai grabbed him in an unbreakable arm hug. “I guess that means I get our room and get to burn all YOUR irreplaceable and valuable stuff this time.” He made a dark smile, Elizabeth just sweatdropped. Tatsuma wiped the black goo from his shades as he heard the loud engines of ships behind him. Shinsuke looked up himself, his eye’s pupil shrink. “AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!” Shinsuke screamed and opened in a worm’s mouth just to climb into it for safety and closed it behind him. “Well if isn’t a familiar face!” Tatsuma smiled as he turned around to see a man in a duck wave from his duck ship window as it landed. “Hey Earth alleys! I came back! HHHHH, CHAIN CHOMPS?!” Eren pointed excitedly to the Skolexians and immediate dashed off his aircraft. He met Katsura face to face for one single silent serious moment. “SUPER KATSUO AND MONDAY ELUIGI BROTHERS!” They slapped on their overall outfits and phoney baloney mustaches begun physically slashing through the beasts with their unleashed gamer powers. “I’M GONNA SAY ALL THE BIRD SLURS! WAH HOO!” Eren stepped on a barking Skolex Chomp’s head and it disintegrated into a floating golden coin. Mutsu’s eye was now twitching from a distance. As Yorozuya and the priestesses kept running on, a sea of poisonus needles suddenly stopped them in their path. Two of the needles landing on the dogs, causing them to fling backwards to the ground in pain. “SADAHARU!” Kagura yelled out. “KOMAKO!” The sisters shouted as well. A large number of Naraku men stepped forward, tipping their hats before attacking the gang before they could take care of the pets. “I didn’t know the Naraku even had any members alive left!” Shinpachi exclaimed as he was blocking blows with one and their martial arts. “Or at least more than a few that went off after Koukan!” “These aren’t real Naraku..” Mone said as her and her sister trapped some in spell barrier of sorts. “Skolexians..” Gintoki kicked two out of the way as they were in pre-merging back as themselves. “You mammals really don’t know how long those Tendoshu slave drivers have been controlling us and controlling you, do you? Half of your Naraku has been us for ages.” One said and a few flung some poisonous needles towards Gintoki. He dodged most of them with his wooden sword, the other two being bounced off of Kagura’s open umbrella. “Oi, worms aren’t good unless to pee on.” With a look of determination and disgust, she closed it and used it as a continous firing gun. Sadaharu managed to struggle up to his feet despite the poison inside of him now. Gintoki got on top of him and they charged to one of them. ”Let’s save the day, buddy.” The worm swallowed the two whole and burped a seconds later. It used a napkin to wipe off its face and slithered way like nothing happened. The other four stood there with darkened faces. “WHAT!?!” Shinpachi yelled out. “WHAT HAPPENED TO THE SERIOUSNESS!? DID THEY DIE?! GIN-SAAAAAANNNN!!” “Aren’t you getting tired of these games, solid?” Roberta had enough of dodging and exchanging blows with the man. She reverted back to her humanoid form. Her and Skele were still on opposite ends of the staircase. “I’m getting tired your games, Roberta! Destroying innocent lives just for one mission you have in mind? “Oh such a nice guy. Do people ever call you that, Skele? I feel like they do. Nice guys bore me.” Roberta decided to bolt down the remaining steps further, she jumped past the do not enter barrier as Skele ran down the opposite end. “You’ll get yourself killed in the process if you do this!” Skele exclaimed, Roberta shook her head and stared into the bright core. “I would have been wiped of my memories if I successfully undid these universes anyways.” She felt a square object inside her shirt. “Plus I would have sacrificed myself if it meant finally undoing the damage I did to her.” Roberta pulled out the photo she had on the window of her news truck earlier of her and Yuka’s first date after a singing gig. “According to Billy, I didn’t even know Yuka in the first universe. So it would be a perfect chance to make sure I don’t hurt her or Valentino..” Skele was right behind her now, he cautiously held up his hands. “If you care for them both-“ “ENOUGH of your good guy babble. I’m unresetting this world.” Roberta readied herself and then slowly started to remember the lines to the Latin. But Skele kicked her down in a flash. She returned some swings but was no match for Skele’s in her humanoid state. She tried to turn back into a worm but he had her arms twisted behind her back. She begun chanting more Latin. “Stop please!” Skele covered her mouth but she kept saying it. “Think about all the Globberians, Skolexians and countless others lives you would erase! Do you think Yuka would want that?! How about Valentino?! Huh?!” “You don’t have much of a spine for being a solid do you? If you’re so concerned about everyone’s safety why don’t you throw me over and kill me?” Roberta then broke free of his grasp and pushed him closed to the edge of the ramps with her worm form. “I’m trying to explain it so you don’t regret it in your grave, Roberta! But if you keep reciting those words I will have no choice but to kill you, if it means saving everyone else.” Skele skidded his boney feet across the mental floors as he tried resisting the pressure. He pulled some stars from his belt’s pocket and slashed at her tail, causing her to wince in pain. She punched him away with her tail and he fell over the railing into the core. Roberta slithered over to see his demise but was met with a hefty kick to her wormy face. Meanwhile, Stephen was inside deeper of the cave with Dylan. Stephen gave the boy his jacket as he was sound asleep while Stephen was intensely watching the scene taking place. “It wouldn’t do her good anyway. The Koukan crystals contaminated the purple ocean out here. Earth’s Altana is the only pure enough green crystal to reset the universe if it comes in contact with the outside world’s.” He shook his head but then moments later felt some distant rumbling from outside the cave. He ran outside leaving Dylan sleeping. “W-what the..Oh no.” “That grinning idiotic mammal didn’t think I knew he was hoarding purple Altana crystals in his cabin. Huh, wonder how he got them. Guess that’s another story for another arc.” Roberta joked as she reverted back to being a humanoid with her injured right leg and pulled it out from the same place over her heart that she kept the picture. Skele’s eye sockets went wider. “Leave it to a bird brain like his assistant to make sure it didn’t get into wrong hands.” She turned back to Skele. “Kill me if you must, bag of bones. Because once I finish these last words and throw these crystals into this terminal, the eternal struggle finally over with.” Skele knocked her to the ground surprising the woman and grabbed the crystal from her hand and he stepped on it, shattering into hundreds of pieces. Roberta casually sat up and dusted herself off, “Hilarious. But I have plenty more.” She took some out and Skele tried attacking her again but she pushed him off of her. She blocked more of his attacks, all while supporting an annoyed look. She reverted back into a worm and grabbed him. She slithered over to the railing and tried shaking him off but he kept clinging on. He managed to get on top of her tail without falling, he climbed up her body and stabbed her in chest with his stars. She roared in pain but couldn’t reach Skele with the angle he was at. Roberta slammed against the terminal but he dodged it and went straight to the front of her face and used one of his gas bombs causing it to temporarily blind her senses. She reverted back to a human with black blood pouring on different angles of her body and her injured leg. She covered her eyes from the toxic smoke as threw the purple altana in the distance, thinking it went over the railing but instead Skele caught it. “Helps when you don’t have the traditional eyes or nose!” Skele exclaimed. She ignored the watering pain of her eyes and tried to look for him in the blinding smoke. He sneaked up behind her and slashed her, but she turned around and punched him square in the jaw but fought her back. The woman finally had enough again, in an instant she grabbed his arm, morphed into a cannon and shot him out of it. He flew through the sky and tried grabbing the railing but with no luck. He skidded down the terminal as it got more and more narrower. “Universum figere, ut nubem iniquitates tuas et dolore!” She chanted. He threw out the final star in his belt using it as anchor. Worm Roberta was now slamming into the walls purposefully to get him to sink lower. “Universum figere, ut nubem iniquitates tuas et dolore!” Skele held onto the little star but one more jolt of banging caused the purple altana stored in his pocket to fall out. “UNIVERSUM FIGERE, UT NUBEM INIQUITATEE TUAS DEL DOLORE!” She had a crazed and snapped look in her eyes now. “NOOO!” Skele yelled as he visibly watched it go further and further until it made a little splash in the enormous pit the colors mixed as it made sizzling sounds. All of a sudden, violent spews of the mixture blew upward in the station, but some blurred item hit Skele before he was impacted. This explosion causing everyone fighting on the streets and in the solar system to temporarily look up at the marvelous but frightening sight from Earth’s core. The skies resumed their previous purple and green hues. The storm picked up again as Stephen looked at it with horror. “NO!” He yelled. He then skadoo’ed back into the book and into the streets. He ran past the terrorists, Justaways, Renho, Skolexians, Yorozuya, and others until reaching the terminal . Steve was also within running distance of there. “STEPHEN!” He shouted but they kept running up the starcase that led to the fuming chambers down below. Roberta had survived the blast due to her thick worm skin but Skele was no where to be found. The blast from the terminal was still going but it wasn’t as strong, so Roberta slithered where the railing once was. “It’s happening.. the unsetting of the universes..” She sighed out in disbelief. “It seems I have even outmastered you, Utsuro, man born of both Altanas.” An unknown man appeared behind her unknowningly now, slowly walking in to avoid the toxic blasts. With the strength of two people, he kicked Roberta outside of the terminal room with a unheavenly blast, it sent her outside of the structure. She turned back into a humanoid and stared at the person who bested her so quickly. “S-Skele..?” She squinted her eyes. “Zelus.” He replied back and stopped her with his sword before she got up. “We have to get up to there!” Steve exclaimed as Stephen and him were climbing up the stairs. But it overflowed with the gleaming liquids and they ran back to the base for safety. Oboro and Poe appeared next to them tipping his strawhat. “It’s too late you two, this is biggest amount of raw supernatural energy I have ever seen.” Oboro looked up. “Roberta has done it, she has caused such a damage that every space time continuum ever concieved might collasp.” “You mean it won’t just change the universe, it will destroy any universe?!” Steve exclaimed to his elders. “Yes, but there’s no definite absolute telling what this can do at this point, Steven-dono. That’s the most frightening part.” Oboro’s face was darkened with the upmost seriousness. Zelus lashed out at Roberta and held up his unique glowing sword with a skeleton symbol on the handle. Roberta stood up in battle stance but even more confused now. “What kind of Globberian are you?” She asked the man. “A unique liquid and solid morph of superior minds and forces.” He slashed her neck with his sword, she yelled out in pain. He was easily able to kill her but something held him back. “We don’t have time to kill her now, Yuka. We have to focus on the universe at hand!” The man said to himself. “Yuka..?” Roberta said. But Zelus’s face went dark and he begun wailing on Roberta’s face with his fists, she could do little since her arms were pinned back. “YOU DON’T DESERVE TO HAVE LIFE! NOT AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO VALENTINO! HOW FUCKING STUPID IT WAS FOR ME TO ACTUALLY GIVE YOU THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT AFTER ALL THESE YEARS AFTER FINALLY GETTING OVER WHAT YOU DID TO ME! I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU.” Zelus kicked her some more, Roberta allowing it. “I LET YOU INTO MY LIFE. I EVEN LOVE YOU.” Roberta’s face was bloody and bruised now, her heart was damaged even more emotionally. Yuka looked as streamed down Roberta’s face, Yuka unable to not tear up herself turned her back to not show emotion. Finally Skele snapped her out of it and pulled their body off the woman. Roberta softly spoke out with pain in her tone. “After this universe is gone away with, you won’t have the burden of the lost of your brother, Yukes. Luckily for you, you won’t even know me.” Zelus still had his back turned to her. “Do you know why I came back to help these mammals, Roberta? Do know despite my physical and emotional pain, I am risking my life just to put a stop to a timeline where I could possibly have my family back?” He said, Roberta just continued staring at the snow. “I’m not running away from my problems. I’m facing them head first because I know now these Earthlings would actually do the same for me and my kind.” Zelus watched on the streets as Katsura helped out a smaller Globberian who was having a hard time defending himself against a Skolexian. The Skolexians were growing tired, their minds distracted by the terminal as well. “I don’t know if it’s Skele telling me this, my conscious or whatever is left inside of me of Sophia and Valentino. But think about yourself, your people and face this problem at hand. Do you want to run away from your problems again?” Roberta manage to sit up for the first time and had her knees to her aching chest. The sky was rapidly changing hues now, from purple to green and back. Joe could see it from the hospital window as Josh was sound asleep. Joe sighed. The fighing between the others and the Skolexians finally ceased as the worms told them they have given up. They reverted back to their humanoid forums and stood there by the humans and other amantos as the universe was in its mid-stages of undoing itself. One worm continued to slither up to the terminal though. It transformed back to a human, causing the two individuals inside to spill out. Gintoki got back on his dog as nodded to the Skolexian as he nodded back. “ARRFFF!” He kicked in into high gear as the priestesses and yorozuya watched from a distance where the rest of the crowd was gathered. “GIN-SAN!” “GIN-CHAN!” He ran up the crumbling station, literally coming apart from the impact of the crystals. Sadaharu galloped through small patches where the liquid wasn’t touching the ground until finally reaching the core itself. Gintoki hesistantly looked at it but Sadaharu jumped down into it. “SADAHARUUU!” Gintoki yelled. The dog disappeared into the molted core. However, he popped up momentarily and barked like a happy pup. He begun clenching his entire body. “Oh of all times to drop a load..” Gintoki rubbed his face but he watched as the dog was harvesting the energy inside of the terminal which was his born given job. The pup was struggling but determined. Gintoki decided to meet up with his children, as it wasn’t safe for him there alone. He passed by Steve, Stephen and Oboro as he dashed away. The dog was helping reverse the effects of the sky somewhat but he needed to generate much more power. Roberta looked at this and furrowed her eyebrows and begun chanting the same phrase over and over again. “UNIVERSUM FIGERE, UT NUBEM INIQUITA-!” She looked down and felt the glowing sword in her chest. “You will never change will you, Roberta?” Zelus extracted the glowing sword now drenched in black blood from her body and she laid limp. He examined the body and stood over it to avoid any complications. His expression was sorrowsome. “How do we generate more power for Sadaharu, Miss Mone Boss Lady and Miss Ane Boss Lady?!” Kagura asked the sisters from where they stood. “Our powers are not enough to contain both Altanas. We’re gonna need the support of everyone here.” Mone said. “If they release positive energy, it should be able to guide Sadaharu on his journey!” Ane stood in front of the crowd and they gave positive loud responses in return. They begun giving the dog words of encouragement, yelling it loud enough to hope he could hear it. Sadaharu was struggling and panted but was holding on. After some time, half of the Earth was returning back to clear blue skies, but the other half was still holding on. Steve, Stephen and Oboro ran into the crowd and started shouting as well. “You can do it Sadaharu!” They all shouted. Oboro was continuously shouting not hearing the others when suddenly it went completely quiet. He stopped and looked at Poe. His beak dropped as well. The entire crowd was frozen in time. He looked up at the terminal that was still blasting up. Stephen scrambled through the crowd as the two anxiously ran around the city and saw all the same thing. “Oboro.” Stephen pointed to the sky. The purple and green part was violently blinking now, after several finally stopped, Oboro and Stephen were absolutely shocked at what they saw. “Oi what is this?” Kid Gintoki was tapping at the sky, he shrugged and continued on his way to class. The sky shifted again to random points in universe one’s history. “A gateway to the past while this universe is still somewhat here?” Stephen couldn’t even process what was going on now. “I always knew Sensei was aware of time even in the past. I wonder if this is how he did it..” Oboro said with his jaw still open. Billy, Jazzy and Suave ran up to them as they previously had been in the midst of the fight in the Globberian village. Suave’s glasses fell off his face as his mouth was wide open. “The old man is gonna kill all three of us..” Even Billy was in silent shock. They didn’t even notice that someone else still unpaused had ran past them. “ROBERTA!” Stephen yelled out. “How careless it was for Yuka to pick up Skele’s sword in the core, it was endlesly glowing with Altana. It has given me just enough juice and universal awareness to finally change history.” She used her newfound energy to morph into a worm and flew herself up to the portal. Stephen, Oboro and Poe looked at the gods. “You three definitely have more power than we do in our current state. Go after Roberta-dono, we’ll try to patch things up here.” Jazzy said and Stephen, Oboro and Poe nodded and ran off. “YEAH and with what kind of powers, fishy?” Billy sarcastically asked. “Man, I wish I had green altana to help save the day.” Suave played a somber note on his instrument. “TELL ROBERTA I’M MAKING A NEW METHOD OF TORTURE INSIDE HELL JUST FOR HER!” Billy yelled out in the distance. “How do we even get up there?” Oboro asked the old man. “Just hold on tight you two! Blue skadoo’ed we can too!” The Captain grabbed onto Oboro and Poe and away they flew inside the portal. Roberta looked in the portal below her. It was a purgatory of sorts, she didn’t know what lay in the distance of that white door but she had no time to think as Oboro and Stephen had just entered themselves. She ran through the chaotic loud noises of several points of history both in her universe and countless others. “ROBERTA! DON’T GO IN THERE!” Stephen shouted but she ignored him. She exited through a portal and landed inside someone’s apartment. She got up from the ground and looked around. The phone was ringing through out the room "OOOOIIIII SOMEBODY PICK UP THE PHONE!" A voice bellowed from the bathroom. "Whatever, I'll get it." A permheaded man stood up sluggishly and slothed his way over to the phone. Roberta scrambled up and hid behind the door. Unluckily for her Kagura saw her and opened it up. “Oi Gin-chan. I found another stalker, should I put her in the drawer with the other one?” The girl opened it up and Sacchan was smiling and blushing. Suddenly Stephen and Oboro came through the portal, and landed in a heap. Gintoki stood there with the phone resting on his shoulder now. Kagura and Shinpachi joined him. “Hello?! Hello?! Is this Yorozuya?!” Ozu called from the other line but Gintoki hung up. “Oboro..” Gintoki drew his wooden sword. ”Shiroyasha, why it it the only time you actually call me by my name it’s when the universe collapsing.” Oboro shook his head but rushed towards the woman. “ROBERTA!” He shouted. She slammed open the front door and ran out into the streets, Stephen and Oboro running after her. Yorozuya stood at the front door scratching their heads. “She completely destroyed it! The domino effect of the first original event of the comic book! I can’t believe it!” Oboro exclaimed and him and Poe put their hands to their heads. “First original event?” Stephen raised an eyebrow at the man and his bird. Oboro started to explain himself. “You see Captain, up until that point, the comic book had been completely acting like its canon self for the most part anyway. But for some reason it sparked originality with that call to my boss Ozu-dono. That event is the spiral for the entire collection of unique characters merged together in one comic book that you see here today.” “..I’ll make sure to write that one down in my notes..” Stephen scratched his head. Poe then pecked on them to get their attentions. “Caww!” He said. “There she goes!” Oboro and Poe pointed to Roberta entering another portal. They sped towards it just before it collasped. Roberta was running through several different timeframes and universes, entering and exiting out of portals with the three Altana beings following her. They landed inside of Ozu’s penthouse which was stormed with many individuals for some reason or the other. Roberta stormed off to Guano’s room undetected by the large crowd as Stephen and Oboro kept pursuing. "I'm sure these two anime stars have all the answers stored for you. You just gotta give them a chance to answer them! Like the answer to where Ozizzle, Guano, Kiyoko and Yes Man are. Which they're getting supplies at the party store while waiting for these two to clean up Shinpachi's diarrhea on these walls!" Mikey said. "You just answered the questions for yourself even though you asked us to..." Gintoki silent said and slapped his face so hard that he bled a bit. "YEAH! YEP! YEP! YEP! YOU GUYS FIGURED IT OUT! NOW OUT WITH ALL OF YOU SO WE CAN FINISH THE CLEANING FOR THE PARTY!" ”This is weird. What’s with these photoshops? Why are they so simple? Wait, most of these are just Woogle reaction images!” Oboro asked Poe but he shrugged. ”And why does everything feel spontaneous? Like it wasn’t really written with much of a plot in mind.” Stephen added. “Wait a party? I wanna go to it!" Gonard said and every one else agreed. "Yeah and we're not leaving until we get it. Just to make sure you actually are having a party." Hiijikata said. "WELL WE HAVE TO CLEAN FIRST REMEMBER!" Gintoki screeched. Stephen and Oboro shook their heads to snap out of it and went into Guano’s room. They looked all over for Roberta but couldn’t find her. ”Huh, so this is what a director does with his spare time.” Oboro picked up a complex Wego Bionicle figure he had built. Suddenly a portal emerged from it, causing Oboro to drop it. Roberta swung down from the ceiling and kicked them to the floor before jumping inside of it. Poe slapped them to their feet. “WHO ARE YOU THREE AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY ROOM?!” Guano ran into the room in a frenzy. But the two and their bird flew inside the portal, closing before Guano could catch them. The next portal entered inside a 7-11 as three amanto were stuck in one of the freezers. “And I said, Kooler Kave, dog? More like Kooler KHUMP!” “HA!” “Yare yare.” Stephen and Oboro ran through the aisles chasing Roberta as other people got out of their ways. She saw another portal enter through the slushee machine and dove into it, the trip close at hand. The portal reopened to another timestamp, Oboro and Stephen spilled out of it and stared at the events taking place in front of the restaurant of the jouis. Roberta speed off inside. “Universe 21? Wow, it’s not just time travel. These portals must be taking us to different universes now!” Oboro loudly whispered to the Captain. “Moe’s!” Gintoki, Shinsuke, Zura and Skele proclaimed. “Chipotle!” Tatsuma suggested. “Moe’s!” They argued back. “WE’RE GOING TO CHIPOTLE WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT!” Tatsuma pulled out his gun and aimed it at his friends. Oboro, Poe and Stephen quickly rushed inside and locked the doors behind them. “Well that was traumatic to relive again.” Stephen said breathed out. “Tell me about it.” Oboro added. They turned their attention to Roberta who was looking at them too now. She stood there frozen looking around for another opening. Oboro and Stephen made a dash at her and she jumped over customer’s food covered tables to get to the other side of the room. When the three cornered her in front of the buffet, she noticed a portal starting to open up in the e coli covered chicken. She smirked and then kicked them away in their faces before climbing over the glass divider and pushing away the employees. She dove into it as Stephen and Oboro scrambled to their feet and jumped over the buffet as well. Stephen and Poe jumped in with ease however Oboro bumped his head into the metal divider trays before he could enter. “Ow.” He said and rubbed his achy jizz head. Poe facepalmed as Stephen shook his head from the other side of the portal and grabbed the jizz man’s hand inside. The four landed on the terrorist ship in a dark bedroom. “AAHHH!” Katsura yelled and covered him and his husband up with their blanket. “And this is even more traumatic than the last event..” Oboro and Poe turned their heads away from the unholy sight. Roberta ran outside the room and down the hallways while passing by Takechi. “Excuse me miss, do you have permission to be on this shi-“ She turned her arms into wormy tentacles and tossed him out the window into the bay. Oboro and Stephen came into the scene just as she left and looked out the window, the bay was covered in chocolate milk. Takechi happy scooped some into his feminist hands and into his feminist mouth. “Universe 13, the universe where everyone became diabetic.” Oboro shook his head and they continued on their search. “You got to be pulling my leg now, Oboro.” Stephen put a hand to his forehead. Roberta bolted it to the next room which was EF’s recording studio. “Senpai, what DID you exactly have to do in order to get our first gig?” Matako asked him, Bansai just looked in the nonexistent distance and put his hand on the window’s blinds, if there was any which there wasn’t. Matako’s eyes narrowed. Roberta ran inside, knocking all of their expensive stuff over. -Alert, unknown woman with tinted glasses!- Elizabeth exclaimed. “Hey who the hell are you-“ Bansai then threw down his guitar as it was starting to have a glowing portal. “AAAH! THAT COSTED MORE THAN I PAY MY BANDMATES!” Roberta pushed him aside and jumped into it. Stephen and Oboro opened the door and followed inside the portal before it closed. The band stood there dumbfounded. “I told you two I posess the magic of music.” Bansai proceeded to get hit by Elizabeth and Matako’s instruments. As Oboro, Poe and Stephen landed they couldn’t see Roberta in sight this time. “Hm, where did that slippery worm go this time?” Stephen wondered but the two others shrugged. Unknownst to them, she was hiding in an alley at a lost of what to do next. She didn’t exactly have a plan, she just wanted to see if the universe would unset itself with her presense, however it was still staying thanks to frozen Sadaharu and the gods efforts. This Edo seemed to be in a panic to find someone, the cops were flooded in the area. Stephen and Oboro could make faint of a bald man with glasses talking to no one next to him. Stephen put his hand out to possibly make contact with him but Oboro put his hand on his shoulder. “That’s not the man you know, Captain.” Oboro said and they witnessed the man still talking to himself and got up closer to hear it without making theirselves known. Stephen was even more confused. “Who is he talking to then?” Stephen peered at the bald man. “Probably just some ghost.” Oboro tipped his straw hat and they continued to try to find Roberta. Roberta decided to take the chance and walk away from the police, she doubt they knew of her yet. That’s when she saw a crowd surrounding a woman talking to disgruntled individual. “Sky News 9! Sir, is something wrong sir?” She asked. Roberta gasped, it was herself. She remembered what Billy told her, how she was resurrected in this first universe for winning a cardgame. She transformed into an unsuspecting man to not draw any attention as she got closer to the crowd. “Leave me ALONE! I’m trying to escape someone!” The chaotic looking man wanted to escape but the crowd was surrounding him. Roberta kept her press to talk to him. “Hey slow it down there big guy, we can help you! What’s the mat-“ The present day Roberta gasped as she saw as the crazed citizen rip his hand out of the other Roberta’s body, she fell to the ground as people gasped. He kept running away. Present day Roberta turned back to her normal self and covered her mouth in horror. The reality of her mortality was setting in, she looked down at her body. Although the altana had healed the outward injuries she started to feel the side effects of being impaled by the toxic crystals. She slowly walked backwards, still in shock. She ran away for a while but eventually stopped to catch her breath. That’s when she heard his voice coming from outside near a Pizzeria. “Yo sorella!” “Pizza Castle! I’m tellin’ you lil’ sis! This place has the best deep dish of the country!” Roberta’s entire body went cold, she slowly turned around as she saw Yuka and liquid Valentino enter inside the pizzeria. Whatever plan she has previously she completely haulted and purused them inside. She sat in a table in the distance where they were, making sure they couldn’t see her. Behind her menu, she could see Valentino struggling to eat his favorite Whicago styled meatlovers in his gooey state. The meat and cheese just kept sliding off of him, making a mess. From this Yuka made a little smirk the way she would do when she would break her stotic nature once in a while. Roberta made a silent chuckle. She however started coughing up black blood a bit from the stabs of Altanas flowing inside of her. ‘This is what I want to see, even if I die at this point.’ She thought to herself. ‘I’m glad I got the chance to know them even if they won’t remember me.’ “Aye sorella check this out!” Valentino stuck two breadsticks entirely down his gooey body but they were rejected back up instantly, launching in the sky. He spun around and caught them with his gooey flippers. “Tada!” Happy memories of over the years were flooding through Roberta’s head at this point. She looked down at the table, still making a little grin and tear drops fell onto the table. She didn’t even notice the physical pain now piercing blade in her chest. Her jaw dropped and she turned her head to face them. “You were so close to resetting the universe, Roberta. We thought if we sent our best Tendoshu out there it would rile you up enough to finish your task to blow yourself up and leave us in a more controllable universe. But even you seemed to have a weakness huh?” The Tendoshu leader said, he swiped off Roberta’s idle body from the sword and she fell to the floor in a dark bloody mess. The guests and staff there gasped in horror and started to become frantic. “H-how..” Roberta whispered out. She made a little gasp from what Billy told her once. “U-utsuro’s immortal blood in exchange for his membership..” A waitress tried using the corded phone there to call the authorities but another Tendoshu member sliced it off its rack with a mere flick of the weapon in his hand. The woman then fell behind the cash register in terror. “What the hell is happenin’ over there?!” Valentino got up and quickly slithered to them all despite Yuka’s protest. “Valentino, don’t involve yourself in these Earthlings problem.” Yuka stood up to try to change her godbrother’s mind. “There’s a bleedin’ woman right here, Yukes! Of course I’m gonna involve myself in it!” Valentino exclaimed and slithered up to the Tendoshu. “V...Valentino.. P...Please don’t..” Roberta silently said as she was fading in and out. “This doesn’t concern you this time, Globberian.” Another Tendoshu member spoke up, Yuka looked up surprised. “Tendoshu. What are you doing here on Earth?” She folded her arms and demanded an answer. All the guests there at this point were hiding or dashed out of there. Oboro and Stephen saw the commotion coming from the outside and decided to investigate inside the restaurant. They stopped dead in their tracks once they saw them all. “Majesty Yuka. You were always a useless and uncooperative pawn. Your nonexistence in this new universe will provide us with a even larger market for more Altana.” Another member said. Two of them opened their robes and drew out their swords. Valentino slithered in front of his sister in an instant. “NOOO!” Roberta gained a rush of energy and intercepted the fast Amanto before they managed to hurt the siblings. She was once again impaled this time by two more swords. She paused for a moment before she collasped into Yuka and Valentino’s arms. “Who are you..?” Yuka looked at the woman. “Just some old worm next door.” Roberta smiled again. “..who loves you with all her heart.” Yuka raised an eyebrow, Roberta then looked at Valentino. “No.. she loves the both of you with all her heart..her only real friends she ever had..” She looked up at the slow spinning ceiling fan as her head was spinning rapidly itself. “Oboro.. Captain.. don’t keep my stupid little fantasy world from destroying the real Yuka, my people and everyone else. Just say the latin words precisely backwards.. Find more purple altana.. I’m pretty sure it will fix all the mess I caused.” The two men both somberly nodded. “I’m finally not running away from my problems, huh Yukes?” She looked the siblings in their faces now. She placed her hand on their faces. “S-sorella..?” Valentino turned his head to her in confusion, Yuka had supported the same look. Roberta kept warmly staring at the two until a metallic fist out of no where penetrate her skull, shatterng into bloody black pieces on impact everywhere. Yuka and Valentino scrambled back, Stephen and Oboro’s jaws hanging low at the individual with the cybornetic implants who did this. “You were right you alien strawhat freaks. That woman did come back to life despite me killing her on the street earlier. That bastard Shouyou and his time shifting powers, where ever he is right now now. This woman must have been some big fish of his.” Joe said and cracked his bloody cyborg knuckles. TBC
  10. The sky was turning an even more darker purple as the palm trees of the tropics were nearly being torn out of the ground. Dylan in a panic, grabbed his coconut friends and started to run. But he “””accidentally””” dropped the Billy one. “Oops.” He fled farther into the island to find some kind of isolation and protection somehow. He came across a dark cave and laid on the cold floor fetal position in a ball with the coconuts on his lap. “Dylan wants to go home.. Dylan wants to go home..” Suddenly some voices spoke out. “Don’t worry Dylan, we love you!” The audience said. “AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!” Dylan jumped up and ran away deeper in the cave, leaving them and the coconuts behind but he kept clutching onto the comic book. Meanwhile inside of the book, the citizens of everywhere on any planet were speechless on the streets of their cities looking up above them at the purple skies of the late afternoon. In Tokyo, the Rampaging Rabbits, Saitama and Genos stopped their construction on Lilymu Towers and looked up above them. In Edo, Katsura and the terrorists all got up on the main deck and Shinpachi stopped sweeping momentarily as the windows of their apartment suddenly went dark. Gintoki and Shinsuke sat up from their areas in the living room and stood behind the teen. “G-Gin-san..” He pointed outside. As Edo citizens were paralyzed with fear or scrambling about, the news broke out on one of the mega sized televisions. “Breaking news from Sky News 9! Edo is covered in some weird purple sky! Numerous reports are coming across multiple planets of the same occurrence! More with Roberta who is stationed inside the woods with better views!” The anchorman heard some chatter coming from behind the scenes. “Eh? What do you mean she went off somewhere this morning with the truck?” The program was still on the air unknown to the news cast itself when suddenly a large black object hit the TV with a large smack of its tail. Causing shards of glass to shatter on the streets. They looked up and saw black squiggly lines plunging to the earth. They started to scream in horror and run around as the squiggly lines got closer to the ground. Gintoki and the other two ran outside the Snack Bar onto the snowing streets. Matsudaira with his cigarette could be seen standing outside the Shinsengumi HQ. “Alright boys, I didn’t spend the last few days trapped on a sensei head planet to not prepare for an amanto invasion! Let’s roll out!”, He proclaimed and his men there gave a loud hurrah. In the Mimawarigumi and other police stations they did a similar thing. Nobume and Sougo had been given the special task to guard the Edo and Oukoku royals (and Kagura!) inside the guarded castle, the latter who were stuck on this planet for now. Shige was talking to his little sister with Kagura, their handcuffed cousin, Barkas and Jii. Hata was in the corner of the room with Sougo. “I’m so terrified.” Hata put his hand to the freezing window. It left a fogged mark from his purple hand. “Who knew Amantos could be so violent to each other? Let alone cute worm ones?” Sougo briefly looked up from slouching up against the wall. “Hata...” He slowly said. Hata turned to the man. “Yeah Mr. Police Man?” Hata tilted his head. “If none of us make it out from this. I have to tell you something...” Sougo looked on the floor. “Sure! Go ahead!” Hata chimed. Sougo slowly walked over, hands in his pockets and still looking at the floor. Sougo then unexpectedly grabbed a hold of the purple prince’s shoulders and kissed him on the mouth. “Phew! I just had the most terrifying dream about out-of-character people that the Banter Police wouldn’t be happy of the author about!” Hata smiled as he dozed off in a big cozy blanket with most of others. “I hate feeling so helpless. I’ve been on the battlefield before and now I’m forced to stay behind?” Barkas shook his head as he was giving a long handshake to the cowpoke. “This isn’t our war to fight this time, Barkas.” Jii took a puff of his cigarette. Nobume sighed out clutching onto Jugem and Fluffy tighter, hoping Isaburo and their team would be okay without her. “I reckon it be like this sometimes. Wearin’ cuffs, in a giant blankey with a buncha royals, laying up against a dog’s butt, givin’ a mighty fine handshake to a man I barely know.” Nobunobu said. “Barky, can I have a special cool handshake too..?” Shige asked but they were too immensely into it. The five royals, two police officers and one old man (and Kagura!) continued to watch the devistating destruction from outside. Sougo sighed as he was still unable to talk Hata still. Feeling defeated hewent to get under the covers with the others but they all gave him a look so he continued sitting up. —————— “Mother of Sensei..” Oboro’s attention moreso was drawn to the purple skies. “Oh no.. with this much purple altana hanging around in clouds it could cause a universe unbalance the likes that no one has ever seen before..” Poe hid in his neck frightened. Suave then took off his sunglasses dramatically and spoke out, “This is bad, I can’t sense my brothers anymore. I can’t even feel my godly powers.” “Don’t worry B.G.C.C., Best God Chum Chode, I still have my godly powers in control.” Enshou whipped out his pink lightsabers. Suave then put his hand on Enshou’s shoulder. “I’d advise against doing anything too risky, Enshou! The Skolexians are a lot more dangerous than they look.” He said. Mikey then came bursting through the theater doors and his jaw dropped. “T-The worms.. they’re back..” Mikey had a flashback to last year after that fight got settled, he could have sworn he saw these creatures in the sky. He remembered the text message he recieved momentarily ago. “Guy who weirdly looks like me!” He stood in front of Suave. “I think Jazzy and your other brother are somewhere in the woods. We should reach them to find out what to do!” “TALLYHO!” Enshou bolted into the streets without them. He instantly got swallowed up by a passing Skolexian. The other five stood there, dumbfounded. “And I thought the author had a hard time writing me seriously.” Oboro said. There were several trembles coming from inside the Skolexian’s stomach until the entire worm imploded, black goo splattering everywhere. “I got out but pretending the black goo was from Shijaku’s cock.” He licked the front of his fangs with his gooey tongue. The other four braceD themselves as more worms came charging at them. Tatsuma begun quickly texting someone in City Z. “I just got a text from Sakamoto.” Mutsu held up a text to Skeletino that said ‘PLS HELP MUTSU-SAN!! AHAHAH!’. “Well, what do you say Valentino? You up to going back to Edo?” Skele said to himself. “Aight sure Skels.” He got up from their apartment couch, stretching his and Skele’s body. “It was nice to get some refreshments here in tha meantime. But I really am gonna strongly suggest about addin’ some Mediterranean flavor to this pad.” “Haha alright, bud. It’s your place too now.” Skele smiled. Mutsu smiled too, as weird as it was she knew her boyfriend felt more complete now with his new physical form. “I’m thinkin’ Skelliator, if this works out for us where we can stay here without my lil’ sorella breathin’ down our morphed neck, I’d like to learn some of those stylin’ hero tricks of yours! Sounds like a great ride!” Valentino put his hands in their pockets. “Really?” Skele was pleasantly surprised. “The first chance then I get I’ll ask if the Heroes Association will allow it!” Mutsu then peered outside the windows, the sky had been covered in a purple hue. She made a little gasp. “Sorry to interrupt, but I think you should both look outside.” They joined her and peered at it. Skele and Valentino then held their head in pain. “What’s wrong?!” She asked. “We need to get to the Skeleton Village, possibly round up some of the soldiers to Edo’s woods. Our foresight is giving us a bad feeling of something there.” Skele explained. Mutsu understood and nodded. ————- Back at the woods, Yuka and Roberta stood across from the gods, detectives, Stephen and Hitsugi. Waiting for the other to make the first move. The Skolex hadn’t yet arrived to their area. “You’re really fucking things up for yourself this time, Roberta!” Billy called out but she ignored him. “Yuka, I don’t want to unreset the universe anymore. Why are you continuing to fight? Is money for your people worth the destruction of an entire planet?” Hitsugi asked her. Yuka stared at him before Initiating the first fighting move of the group. She lunged her gooey arm at him but he moved back with energy he surprisingly still had left. Billy and detectives stepped their way in front of Yuka while Roberta and Jazzy were square face to face. “I wouldn’t get too cocky if I was you fish boy.” Roberta smirked and then pointed up. The others looked up in the purple hues of the snowing sky as it started trembling. “Mother of all skadoos..” Joe whispered out as he saw several monsterous creatures appear. The worms were hurling towards the ground, Joe and Steve ran to cover behind pine trees but forgot one crucial person. “JOSHHH!” They yelled out and started to run after him. Josh was traumatized and couldn’t move as the worms finally crash landed in the woods, knocking over some gigantic pine trees in the process. Steve had grabbed their cousin’s arm and tugged him away before he was nearly crushed to death by one of the falling wooden logs. Steve and Josh panted to catch their breaths for a second. Joe climbed over the broken tree and landed on his cyborg fist. “Are you two okay?” Joe asked them, they nodded in return. But it was short lived as suddenly behind them a Skolexian bursted through the tree and made a deafening blast of a roar. The three of them started to run like hell as the creature was tagging up closely behind them. They were trying to come up with a solution. “We should use our handy dandy notebooks!” Josh exclaimed, the other two agreed. Steve took out his classic paper one, Joe started to think of something in his robotic arm and Josh used his tablet. “Uhh w-why aren’t they working?!” Joe tried pushing every button on his arm and eventually slapped it in frustration. Steve and Josh couldn’t get their drawings to come to life either. Meanwhile Roberta was now square up against Jazzy as Billy was squared up against Yuka. The struggling Hitsugi and Stephen were in a battle of their own with a worm. “Why are you doing this, Roberta-dono? After everything Billy has given you?” Jazzy said as he blocked a couple of her attempts to bite him with her worm jaw with his strong as titanium arms. She turned back into a humanoid temporally. “You and your brother wouldn’t understand.” She shook her head. “It’s not of our choice to fight.” “What do you mean?” Jazzy said but she took another wormy swing at him. “I’ll have you know Roberta-dono, I am skilled in many forums of martial arts including those of the spiritual kind.” Jazzy was attempting to use his god powers to strike up bright energy but for some reason it wouldn’t work. The fish’s eyes shrunk. “Huh..? This has never happened before..” “Enough of this shit. I don’t really feel like getting down and dirty, especially with you goohead. Let’s just end this stupid ass thing.” Billy snapped his fingers in hopes of sending the amanto back where they came from but was shocked to see his powers didn’t work just like his big brother and the detectives. “What in Hell..” “The purple Altana from the sky..” Stephen had managed to use a large snow covered branch to fend himself off the giant alien. Hitsugi was cutting up the worm with the blades on his one hand he still had. The Captain watched from the distance as the gods and detectives were all perplexed and staring at their hands. Stephen gasped. “It’s limiting their powers!” Yuka lunged her arm at Billy but even without his powers he managed to grab it in mid-air and flung her down. “Odd, you look like a humanoid and yet my foresight tells me you’re nothing like one at the same time.” She got up on her feet and threw lunging kicks at his face. “Man, Fishy, can we switch partners? You’re use to being around boring stotics like yourself!” Billy exclaimed and Jazzy shook his head. Yuka turned into a giant bear and raced up to him. He tried to outrun her but she jumped on top of him and started to claw his face. Billy kicked her in the stomach flying her back. “Heh, least I still got the ol’ god muscles” He kissed his stained plaided cloth covered guns. Yuka slammed into a pine tree, the solid inside of her was starting to hurt more now. But she shook it off and transformed into a tree herself. Billy came running around trying to figure out which one was her. “Alright green face, now you’re just making this a comedy fight aren’t you?” He leaned his hand against one and the branches suddenly grabbed back. He tried breaking free of Yuka’s grip but she unleashed the roots in the ground of her tree body and tried to timber down on top of him. “All this landing on top of me, are you sure you’re a lesbian?” Billy rolled out in the knick of time. She turned back into goo before she fell on the ground but the extreme rapidly size change of the morph once again hurt the solid inside of her. She turned back into a humanoid and clung onto her aching ribcage, Billy stood next to her. “Such disgusting comments from a poorly dressed man stuck in the 80’s.” The Majesty was scrambed to her feet, whiping green liquid off her mouth. “Aww we can’t all be stuck in the 30’s, miss. Maybe I can make you black, white and red though. Oh god which writer rights this stuff.” Billy shook his head at me and started to punch at her face as she equally blocked the blows. She then smirked behind her, Billy raised an eyebrow. “Maybe I can make you surrounded in black.” She said. She stepped out of the way as a worm rammed into him. She took out a cigar and lit it. She made a cold puff in the air and put her hands in her pockets. “30’s in, 80’s out forever, capeesh?” Jazzy was still fighting Roberta on the opposite side of the open woods ground. He used some karate moves he had developed from training for thousands of years in a remote mountain ..and also from some movie he saw while in his fish tank at Ozu’s. “You like fish so much? I’ve covered plenty of great seafood eaterys in my stories!” Roberta morphed into some tarter sauce. “NOT THE FACE!” Jazzy yelled and covered his head. “Why are they joking around at a time like this?!” Steve exclaimed as him, Joe and Josh had climbed up a tree high enough to escape the Skolexian chasing them. But it was trying to snap at them. They could see all the others there in the woods fighting against these creatures. Steve had the aching feeling many more would be arriving. “Cousins?” Josh pointed to three more joining the other at the base of the tree. They begun wacking it with the sides of their bodies as the trio hung on. “Wait. I have an idea! Just follow me. Do exactly what I do. Especially you Joshy, okay?” Joe said while looking at the both of them in their eyes. “O-okay Joe.” Josh nodded. Joe grabbed the sturdy branch above them and begun swinging around on it with his arms. With a lost of what to do, the other two followed. Soon enough they gained enough momentum and flew off of the tree. They hit one worm in the head as they landed on it with their feet and slid down its back. “Yabba dabba doooo!” Joe yelled out as Steve facepalmed. At the tail they gained enough speed again. Joe grabbed the other two in mid-air and activated his cyborg arm to blast them away, it flew off from the pack of worms. There they saw Stephen and Hitsugi still doing battle of their own. Joe saw Yuka just standing there with a cigar. He looked at his family, they nodded and he sped off as Steve and Josh went to help the other two. Joe went to sneak attack her, he lifted his fist back to make the first move but she quickly turned around and blew him away with her gooey fist. He flung into a tree, breaking around into it on impact and coughed up some blood. She took out a cigar before letting out a puff and putting her hands in her pockets. ”You wanna try that again, slick?” “So far for first impressions.” Joe jumped out of the wreckage and went again for another blow to her which she dodged. “Why do you humans keep fighting back? Why won’t you accept your fate?” Yuka turned her arm into a sword and tried to slash at him. However he dodged it and roundhouse kicked her in the stomach, she coughed up green liquid. “I hate to break it to you Yuka but us humans aren’t the spineless little chimps you’ve come to believe.” As she tried to support her aching bones in her spine and ribs, he punched her in the jaw and sent her flying back into a tree. Roberta noticed this as she was still fighting with Jazzy but regained her focus. “Maybe you’re not as spineless as I thought..” Yuka slowly said but winced in pain as she wiped the goo from her mouth. “But you definitely are more of a pest than I thought.” She mustered up enough strength to get out of the tree. Her bones were making unpleasant sounds but she ignored them and turned her hands into firing machine guns. Joe was dodging most, some swiping at the sides of his face and clothing leaving painful marks. Two managed to swipe him in the shoulder and he winced in more pain. He used his cyborg arm’s jet to fly around, he went to kick her in the face but she dropped her gun and grabbed him by the leg. She swung him and he soared across the sky, landing in a pine tree. He shook the needles off of him as the cawing crows flew away inside. He started flying towards her and avoiding bullets again. Eventually she ran out of loads and looked down at her guns leaving her briefly distracted. Joe used this window of opportunity to get behind her and punch her in the neck, leaving a visible gooey mark. She fell to the floor but quickly stood up and grabbed his non-cyborg wrist with the damaged arm before he was able to strike again. Yuka started to twist it back with the strength of ten men. Joe was agonizing in pain. “Pitiful species. Though I must say you do put up a hell of a fight, Joe. Your style may be chaotic and frantic but it also gives off a charismatic fragance for some reason.” Yuka said this all in a calm voice as Joe was grinding and grunting his teeth out in pure pain. As this was happening, a Skolexian came zooming around the corner with a man riding on top of it and it trampled Yuka before she could react “BANG BANG I AM THE WARRIOR!” Billy had control of the creature, he lifted his fist up in the air like he was in the final scene of his Wreakfast Club DVD movie. Joe had broke free at the last moment and Billy gave him a lift up onto it. “YUKES!” Roberta broke free of her fight with Jazzy and ran up to her. She was still alive but unable to move, her limbs were broken in all different ways. Roberta picked her unconscious body up and started to carry her to somewhere safer. Jazzy shook his head. The god looked at them knowing they would all deal with those two later as they had more pressing matters to attend to here. “R-Roberta?” Yuka spoke out in quiet tone. She could see she was being carried on a stretcher from Roberta’s shapeshifted hands to somewhere deeper into the snowing woods. “Yukes I know what you’re gonna yell in my morphed ear. But we don’t have time for that. You’re really hurt.” Roberta’s breath was getting heavy. She couldn’t morph that well in this altitude, her stretched became unstable so she carried Yuka on her back. “Let me down..” Yuka said slowly. “Yuka it’s pouring out sno-“ Roberta was getting irritated. “I SAID LET ME DOWN!” Yuka yelled out, surprising out Roberta as the blonde woman usually kept her cool. She took Yuka off her back slowly and used her own sweater so Yuka wouldn’t touch the snow. “I... don’t know who you are but Roberta died seventy years ago. “For god’s sake, can we just talk about it when we get-“ Roberta was cut off again. “I’m not leaving here until you explain yourself, alien.” Yuka furrowed her eyebrows. Roberta just sighed out. ———— Darkness. That is the first thing I remember seeing after a sort of long nap if you could call it that. I thought I was laying in bed, if I could flip on the light switch and I would see the reassuring warm hues of my room enough to calm my racing heart. But it wasn’t like that, nothing like that at all. No light switches, no space where I laid stuck inside a enclosed forgotten box. My immediate first response was to stop my skin from crawling. I wasn’t use to feeling to limited, so out of control. I couldn’t barely breathe. Bugs were crawling all over me inside that box, as if they were previously consuming me. I remember morphing into something bigger and punched through the box. I wound up sunken in what must have been literally tons of dirt above me. Once again my nerves unrattling me, I tunneled through and eventually reached the surface.. of my resting place. I couldn’t believe it, there’s no way. I excused it off as some stupid harmless prank. Or someone wanted to take revenge on me, I had plenty of enemies at this point. It was late that night on Skolex, I shook my head continuously at the grave’s scription. Could I really have been dead for 20 years? Impossible. No.. I remember shaking my head all the while as I left that gravesite and looked around the city I grew up in. As I look back now 50 years later at his in present day, having relived this event millions of times in my head, the tiny details are what are important to me. Not a single item was adorned for me on my grave. Nothing of our customs. My grave was completely bare compared to all the others.. except a single yellow flower. It must have been recently put there, I remember it looking fresh. I clutched it in my hand as I cautiously made my way around the gigantic bustling city and its skyscrapers of that late night. Much had changed, much had shifted in technology since I last remembered. I was horrified, shaking, at a lost of words. Here in a sea of other Skolexians in their own worlds, schedules, families. Was this the afterlife? Was I dreaming? Another plain of existence? I.. needed answers, I needed comfort.. I needed... her. I remember sneaking on board a star ship because I was too weak too make my way around as a worm. I stayed in the cargo bay because of course I had no money, no home, I wasn’t even sure if the Council of Skolexians was still around. My species is quite long lived so the excuse of someone dying and coming back to life would be made a mockery of. Fucking figures. The Council was more a slave industry than anything. I always admired my people’s knack for preservation I never really got concerned about the morals involved with it. We eat lifeforms. It’s just apart of who we are. So who cares? But what of us who wanted to live normal careers and lives on Skolex and not leave the planet? No one lives a normal life as a Skolexian. Anyway. After a few weeks, I stumbled to the planet, Globbus. It was a small community of people. Poor looking, chintzy villages here and there scattered through the rather large planet. I knew this place well, I use to visit here to see her. Huh, I was coming back here for reasons I wasn’t even sure of myself. I was no longer bonded by the Council, free to choose where I went as I please. I needed some answers, forgiveness maybe even. Who the hell else gets a second chance at life anyway? My heart was pounding as I arrived there. My tattered and faded black customary Skolexian burial attire robes from the coffin. The liquids guarding the capital building in which she resided in all these years. When I arrived they were frightened of me and were pointing their weapons at me. That’s when I saw another liquid glob, I had a feeling on who it was. “I-impossible.. Roberta.. you died two decades ago..” He was absolutely horrified, I could hear it in his voice. “Valentino, I need to talk to Yuka. I need to talk to you too. I.. don’t know how but I came back to life.” I spoke this in a softer voice than I usually made. “N-no..” His last words before he shakingly slithered backwards into the building. Looking back, I tried so fucking hard to keep my emotions intact, here was this lively and seemingly kind man to most people. And I had the heartbreaking embarrassment of having to watch that fucking pizza tosser from the window talk to his little sister with exaggerated expressions. What the hell could someone dead for so many years possibly cause a threat to? He was probably lying to her. God, why did I ever befriend that doofus man in the first place? “Yuka!” I called out, the guards were already picking me up at this point and ushering me away from the building. I got her attention though. I held up the wildflower still in my palm. She came out of the doors, what a lovely sight, the girl I use to flirt with, ordained in a suit. At times in the past I would have made a teasing joke about it or something else about her. Valentino and I always knew how to push her buttons so that she’d ease up and enjoy herself once in a while. I even called her a lover for a short span of time. They were only two people I felt genuinely happy with as a dirty Skolex. Yuka supported a similar concerned look as her godbrother probably did before, but a bit more toned down. She always kept her composure even when facing the most difficult obstacles. “T-That can’t be you Roberta.. I watched you die that day.” She looked directly at me as the guards remained between us. “I know it’s confusing but look.” I pointed to the wilting flower in my hand. Then her pupils visually shrunk. “I-It’s the wildflower from my grave! I know you put it there, Yukes!” “Sick impersonating monster..” She shook her head, more fear in her eyes and quickly walked back into the building. I walked in the rain through the pitch dark villages until finding a lonely and desolate bus stop to sink down into. “For whatever its worth Yuka, I did really like you, probably even loved you. I meant it those nights together too. I know you don’t believe me though. I truly hope if situations were different, we could have stayed together.” My last words to her of my previous life. I didn’t “probably” love Majesty Yuka, I did love her, period. She was the only ray of sunshine I had in my controlled life. Her and her brother, only genuine friends, kind hearted people in the universe. I wanted to stay with her back then but I had to think of my people. The job I was handed out to do. Now this was the “different situation” and chose to reject me. And I have a feeling that if she was sure who I said I was, she’d still reject me. That’s when reality set in more. I felt a deep pain in my stomach and chest.. How am I alive? Why am I alive? How could have it been truly twenty years since I died? My thoughts were wild. My eyes were fully open. I felt hysterical. I would spend the next ten years away from her and outside the shapeshifter’s black hole solar system. I had to find the answers to my questions, I wondered from place to planet to solar system with no results. One day coming across the Milky Way and planet called Earth inside of it. There was a job listing for a news anchor in a city called Edo. Maybe something to finally numb the haunting lingering of my existential crisis, my passion in journalism I’d abandoned so many years ago. I was on my way to audition for the job disguised as a man when I literally bumped into probably the most interesting individual I’d ever come across, and that’s quite a statement from an asshole like me. The strawhat man looked at me with smiling eyes that acted like they had recognized me the moment we came into contact, weird. “Oh I’m so sorry!” He exclaimed as his bags of groceries accidentally fell to the ground when we came in contact. “It’s okay, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going I guess.” I helped him with his bags. “Thank you so much. Say, a dressed up gentleman like yourself wouldn’t happen to be off for that popular Sky News 9 audition would you? There has been countless people heading in that direction today for it.” I was surprised he caught that. “Why yes.” I made a little smile and turned around to leave but the guy spoke out again behind me. “If you get job maybe you and your crew could stop by at the school I’m starting soon! I’m sure it might lighten up these troubling times for samurai.” He smiled. I looked behind my shoulder and nodded. When I turned my head back, I felt like he was watching me but when I turned around he was as quickly gone as he had arrived. I scratched my head. Somehow twenty more years past after that. I took on the appearance of a larger and balder man to get off the allusion to the media around me I was aging. Things I do for apeish humanoids, eh? Eh well, I didn’t mind as long as I was able to keep doing my career. That all changed with that stupid popularity poll though. My obsession with seeming important led to my demise, I once again was killed. The next moment I woke up in a sorching hot environment, I opened my eyes slowly. “Well look who came crawling back.” “W-What the hell..” I said. It was some kind of cheap looking mancave. The type of ones I’d have to make news stories about middle aged men living in their mother’s basements. “The wormy mom is back. Oh it’s been thirty years Gedomaru missed you so much and so has your grandson, Skully.” The little girl spoke in some monotone. She then got up and hugged me around waist with a weird bleeding cow skull in her arms. “Geds, stop making everyone play house, jesus.” The plaid shirt man said, I saw his dorky little nametag read Billy. “Why doesn’t she remember her daughter, stupid big brother?” The little girl named Gedomaru asked the man there. “Come on, you know the rules of the afterlife, of course she doesn’t remember this place.” Billy drew another card from the batch. “H-hell..?” I then scoffed. “Yeah alright, let’s go with that. So where’s that stupid Mikey Simon? One moment I’m throwing him against a wall and the next minute I’m here.” “That man is next in line for Hell for hurting my wormy mom, you’ll be sure of that. Please sit down wormy mom and I’ll braid your hair like old times.” Gedomaru snapped her fingers and a chair appeared next to her, she patted it. “Come on toots. Don’t tell tell me you don’t remember all the times I kicked your ass in this game?” Billy, the man with the ranchid hair said. “....” The bearded man added and Billy’s annoyed expression went from 0 to 100 real fast. “IT WAS A JOKE YOU FUCKING IDIOT, I KNOW SHE DOESN’T REMEMBER!” Billy yelled. “....” He also said. “Well those fucking terrorists and pirates were an exception. But ever since verse one I’ve locked up on the rules of who remembers what.” Billy drew another card. The beared man then looked Billy straight in the eyes. “....” “THAT’S FUCKING IT!” Billy then kicked down the man’s chair but unbelievably it floated up on its own to sit back up. I was tired, confused so I releuntantly sat down and joined the group of oddballs. We sat there for hours at that table. Billy chugged his coffee mug down and slammed it on the table. “Aaah. So that’s pretty much it. In ‘verse one after your original death you somehow landed in the mancave. About one in a megatrillion chance I’d say. The only other person who ever achieved that is ol’ Headster.” Billy put his hand on the bearded man’s shoulder. “And after you beat me in a game in that universe, I was forced to bring you back to life in the real world. SomeHOW after endless resets, your twenty-second self managed to beat me once again. Probably cheated like the first time.” Billy scoffed. Sounds like me. “Yeah like it’s real hard to beat you, old man.” Gedomaru drew another card. Billy then wildly zipped the kids mouth closed. “This is just impossible..” I put my hands on my face and shook my head, then my eyes darkened. “Wait.. are you telling me my decades of strive to learn about my origins of coming back to life are just from a stupid Go Fish game?” Billy nodded, I then smirked. “Damn, ol’ Bobby is better at cards than he thought.” Some days passed, I guess I got the knack of it again because this former anchorman was on fire. We also you know, passed the time away. “Thanks for the skully crown, wormy mommy.” Gedomaru told me and I nodded and took another huff. “People always think you burn down here for all eternity but in reality, everyone just kinds of vibes you know?” The devil was getting stoned off his ass. “Rarely a chance I get to roast a fucker, unless he was really some unlikable nasty guy or got on my bad side.” “I’ve gotten on your badside and yet you fail to roast this.” I put my hand up to give Geds a loud high five after she said this. “Also I wanna roast this Mikey Simon alive now.” Gedomaru took a FLAMING HOT wheeto from the snack bowl. I knew I liked this kid. “What’s wrong with you Headster?” Billy said. ”Well I’ll be damned!” Billy exclaimed as I whistled. “NEWSFLASH! A full house!” I spreaded out my fishy cards, Billy and the girl groaned as I laughed and took all the Whuck E. Cheese coins. “I believe we have a deal.” “Oh no, I’m not releasing you from hell again, missy. Do you know how much shit I’d get from my brothers if I bring back the slimey worm who nearly ruined the entirety Edo?” Billy then smirked. “Alright fine. But minimal chaos, don’t want them sinking me any lower in the afterlife than I already am.” “Buuut one final request Bills. If I have full house in the next round, you have to keep my memories intact this time. And we’re talking about memories from the first time I was here fifty years ago too.” “Damn television personas always have a swell head. Fine. Seeing how impossible that would be.” He replied. We played another game, Billy still kept his stupid little smug. “There’s no way you’ll match my next blow, Miss TV. No way in hell-“ His eyes widened as I dropped my cards on the table. “BAM! That’s what we in the showbiz call a ROYAL FLUSH! Now back to you Bills!” I did finger guns. Billy slammed his fist on the table, rubbed down his face and then snapped his fingers. I begun to fade out. “Bye. I’ll miss you mommy wormy.” Gedomaru waved at me. Before I knew it, I woke up in the ruins of the Sky News 9 station I had previously destroyed. I was in my worm form but quickly transformed back into Roberta. There was tape covering the scene, no doubt from the Shinsengumi. I tried to escape but they noticed me. Surprisingly they bought I was a victim, they had been searching for survivors there. I told them I was a camera woman and that could get to the hospital myself and insisted on it. As I left the crime scene I made, my body was taking a toll on me. I guess Billy’s old trick didn’t leave me in perfect conditions. I felt like a walking zombie, literally. As I stumbled out onto the snow covered Edo streets of late December, I leaned against a wall. I was mostly ignored by civilians, maybe one or two people looked concerned as they passed by, a man and his friend slyly asking if I wanted to warm up at their place. Decades later and mammals never fail to disgust me, I punched them into the sky using my wormy arm, despite the fact some people might have saw this, woops. As I begun fading out from the coldness, I then felt a warm blanket pulled over me. I heard the voice of a man. “Oh dear, you look in terrible shape. Let me help you.” I opened my eyes to see the individual. I didn’t really care at this point, I remembered seeing this face sometime long ago so I nodded. He put his arm over my shoulder, every once in a while looking down to make sure I didn’t pass out. We made our ways into the distant woods of the countryside until arriving at a cabin. The inside was warm, inviting. He helped me to the living room couch and got me settled in there with a warm cloth on my head and hot tea. With my eyes closed, I could hear the footsteps of another person coming from the hallway. “Aw man, those two are getting married again?” He tossed down what sounded like a paper of sorts, maybe a postcard “Sensei, please don’t tell me I have to wait around in a tent like unive-“ The man sounded like he had something stuffed down inside his throat. “Cookies for you, my dear.” The man said and placed them next to my kettle of tea. I sluggishly sat up when I was feeling a bit better and took a bite of one as I cautiously looked at the long haired man and his confused weird looking student with a bird on his shoulder. “Sensei, that doesn’t look like a man.” He whispered, his dumbass probably thinking he was quiet enough so I couldn’t hear him. The teacher shoved aNother cookie down his throat. “And you don’t look like Edo’s next top model. Sheesh. This clown.” I sat up all the way and stretched myself. The long haired man sat on the chair across from my sofa. “You’ll have to excuse Oboro here, he fell out of his nest while he was still an egg and damaged his head.” The teacher smiled. I spent the next two days there recovering from my pain. I could tell the entire time they were holding back something. The teacher called Shouyou put another tray of cookies on the table for us. As my head was clearing more I started to faintly remember some things Billy told me during my first visit in Hell. “So if you don’t me asking Roberta, what brought a lovely young individual in a situation like that?” Shouyou sat across from me and the one eyed circus. “Hey author, if you’re gonna have her continuously insult all of us in first person can you tell her to ease up on it a bit.” The jizzheaded mammal took a bite of his trillionth cookie that morning. “Yeah real classy, Roberta.” I rubbed the back of my head at the teacher’s question, I could tell he was testing me but my memories of what Billy said were still a bit foggy. Could it been what he told me about Shouyou? “Got in a real bad slump with my boss you know? But I plan on reapplying for anchorwoman of Sky News 9 soon.” I tried to casually say, wondering if he would catch my bluff like we were playing a game of Go ourselves. “Well I hope you get the job! I’d love to have you interview me and my students! It was so fun during those popularity polls, don’t you think so?” He exclaimed and took a drink of his coffee. My pupils shrunk, my memories of the devil’s words at that moment also coming back. “Do you know who I am..?” I slowly said. “Hmm?” Shouyou hummed. Damn the man really was messing with me now. Bills was right about him constantly doing that. “Well. It’s okay, Billy told me all about the universes thing. Immortal with a real blabber mouth you know? And even worse with his cards.” I said and Shouyou chuckled. Oboro put down his milky and stared at us, as if we had broken some kind of unspoken boundaries. “She remembers the afterlife?” Oboro asked plainly. “Apparently she does! I actually didn’t expect it either!” Shouyou looked more amused than anything, as if he heard some funny joke he wasn’t letting anyone in on. I rested my head on my hand. “It’s crazy. I have nothing to my name again. It’s like I’m restarting over for the first time in thirty years. But I don’t really want to do anything but leave a mundane life this time. After reflecting on the polls, I’m always getting myself in trouble that somehow bites my ass back you know?” I scoffed. “Maybe I should just become a freakin’ vegetarian.” “You know, not everyone gets the chance to start over, Roberta. You are very blessed to have it happen and even more than once at that. It can be a beautiful thing if you choose to do what’s right.” Now he was preaching about me, not even less than ten minutes ago he was messing with what I knew. “No offense, Shouyou. But Billy told me a little about you too. You’ve come back to life probably more times then I would be able to count. And something tells this reporter you’re still not satisfied.” I then stood up, I think catching his student off guard again. I remember looking down at that long haired ape with a real judging look. “Why would you reset a universe twenty-two times, Altana mammal?” “Sensei..” Oboro seemed scared of me a bit. What took me by surprise was Shouyou’s composure during all of this. Here I was, my ass in its still recovering state accusing the most powerful man in the universe and yet his warm expression was more like we were discussing what to choose for lunch. He paused before he spoke up. “I won’t deny anything that man has told you about me, Roberta.” He said the “that” with the most smallest hint of irritation, almost barely audible to the untrained ear. Did I hit him in a uncomfortable spot? Probably barely. “I will admit you and I are more the same than you might think. Traveling through different lives, trying to make a sense of them. Still longing for the answers for your questions. Why am I here? Why do I keep living?” If only I had that foresight thing Yukes said she posesses, I could see what Shouyou was looking at the table at. He then smiled and looked up at me. It felt so sudden that it made me jump a little bit, I still don’t know why to this day. “I may be still trying to find my way, ‘my happy ending’ as I’m sure you are too, miss. Why don’t we support each other to finally find happiness?” “S-Sensei..” This emo looking Oboro fellow was acting as if this was unheard of his teacher to say. “No thank you. I’ve just had enough of excitement for one lifetime. I’m about tired of these games now, Shouyou. I am in control of my life and I won’t let you try to twist me for your own benefit.” I went to leave to the door but turned around to see his reaction just out of natural curiosity. He looked me like a parent almost, firm but also a bit sombersome. “You may say you have it in control but hate and resentment will be your permanent downfall if you let it consume you, Roberta.” Shouyou said seriously. I put on my boots and exited the cabin. But my curiosity got me again or rather wanting to know what they would say behind my back. I morphed into a fly and watched them from the window. “Oboro. Please watch over her, even if I’m gone some day.” Shouyou was still staring at the closed door. “Sensei..? You’re not mad..? That worm woman totally humiliated you back there. Plus she knows way too much. Do you think we should reset the universe again?” “No Obo, she challenged me. Something rarely any people have the guts to do.” I could hear him say inside the cabin. Why did I have the eerie feeling he knew I was listening in? Well, I heard him continue. “She is quite special and you know how much special people mean to me. Accident or not, Billy wouldn’t have just resurrected her in this universe on a whim, he must have found some new potential in her. But there are many other people who could take advantage of what she is and the extreme knowledge she has.” Great, here I had Skolex, a god and now the ruler of the universe at my throat and now I have more goons to worry about? “Okay Sensei.” I heard Oboro simply reply. I had enough, I morphed back into myself and decided to walk through feet of bone chilling snow back to the city. The following is some event is something I would hear Billy tell me somehow through a dream months later. “Psst hey Utsuro! You ask for a cabin house call?” Billy said through the books of Shouyou’s regular library dream. He slouched at the table with the bible book of Relevation and put his feet up. “Crazy shit huh? Ooooh, old Billy here gonna cause a devastating armageddeon that will wipe out the face of the Earth. Sounds moreoso like someone else we might know.” “What is your purpose of bringing her back to life?” Shouyou sat across from him, not even glancing at his book. “Who, old man?” Billy licked his thumb on the edge of the paper as he turned it. “You very well know otherwise you wouldn’t have reached me in my dream!” Shouyou beamed. “There isn’t no purpose. The lady just beat me little ol’ me at a card game.” Billy was now just flipping pages randomly. “Really?” Shouyou said with the upmost smiling sarcasm. “I know, surprising for someone like me to lose at something, isn’t it green crystal dust? If I recall she was one of the casualties of famous ‘verse one Joe.” The god set down his book and looked around the library. “After so many card games with the same three bozos I’d do whatever it takes to get them out of my hair, that’s the only reason I revived the toots. “Yeah I’m sure. Well, I hope drop by again every once in a while! This library could always use more company.” He smiled. “Unlikely old man.” Billy said before phasing out. Don’t know how the hell I managed but I eventually did snag the role of anchorwoman at Sky News 9. Yukes always told me I had a nag for pushing my foot into the door when no one wanted it there in the first place. It was nearly Feburary now and I was getting ready for another daily report. That’s when I heard the mummuring of two individuals behind me. “Hitsugi-dono, do you think we’re watching her a bit too closely than Sensei asked.” I could hear Oboro’s voice. “Maybe a bit, boss.” The other one said. Oi, could you idiots not know I could obviously see and hear you? I ushered the makeup artist to go and swiveled my chair around, somehow catching them off guard, “What the hell are you doing?” Veins were visible on my forehead I’m sure of that. “Oboro said we should stalk-“ Hitsugi started. “Me? Hey after scaring the author and everyone including me and Poe nearly half to death from that little banter comment you made the other day, you should be glad you’re even in this backflash.” Oboro shook his Phoney Baloney Mustache Emporium face. “I was just trying to ease the conversation, Oboro. The authors thought I should lighten up a little sometimes.” I can’t believe they were doing this when we were about to go live in a few seconds. “This is worse than the time at Naraku Band Camp when yo-“ “GET OUT!” I pointed to the door and they scrambled away. The next I would see one of them was early March. It was Hitsugi and apparently he was alone. He came cautiously about to me as he broke the news about Shouyou/Utsuro’s death. “Well it looks like he finally found his happiness. Wish it was the same for everyone else.” I straightened up my papers. “So where’s Oboro? Did he get his head trapped in some sand?” “No, he and I parted not on the best of terms.” He then surprisingly started to walk way, I didn’t even have to call security this time. But then he turned his head to me. “Roberta. I’m going on a trip with a certain man in mind. I don’t know if I’ll come back. Please take care of yourself for Shouyou’s sake.” I just chuckled. “Alright Big Man.” I grinned. Apparently he wasn’t wrong when he said he was going on a trip. It was to Koukan, I only found out about this after the events happened on that planet. I was on a deep space mission with the Sky News in order to get the scoop. But before we even realized our ship had been intercepted and we were boarded. It was all a blur, these men in possibly earth governmental assassin outfits I recognized a little, killing my crew. But it wasn’t just them.. other Syloxians working with these Naraku? The next time I came into consciousness would really be a wake up call. I looked through the blue liquid tank and saw hooded strathat individuals I recognized from my past life. “T-The Council of the Skolexians?” I mustered up to ask. “No, your government fell decades ago, young one.” One of them said and then I could clearly see them better as they lifted up their hats more. My mouth dropped. The Tendoshu. This must have been their base they fled to after leaving Koukan and disappearing off the radars. “What do you want with me..?” I asked. I had a feeling this is who Utsuro had been talking about when he mentioned enemies. My head was racing until another spoke out. “We’ve had hidden men study you on Earth and here. A single Skolexian living on that planet for decades. An empty grave on this planet. Your body coming back to life in your grave and in the rubble of Earth. Meeting up with Altana individuals and staying at their home. You are of Altana.” I was beyond shocked at their level of spying on me all these years, but I furiously shook my head. “I know it may seem that way but honestly I’m not-“ Suddenly the liquid was drained from the tank, the glass windows opened up unexpectedly and I fell onto the floor covered in the weaking substance. I coughed out for air. “Earth’s Altana terminal station. The untouched source of Altana to which the strongest immortal Utsuro was born from. That has been our planned target for years with that man once he joined the Tendoshu. Coincidentally can sense that the comic book is currently not in the place it should be. You will go to Earth and await for instructions for a full planet invasion with the rest of your kind, Altana breather.” They let me go but I knew I couldn’t run. I couldn’t escape them. How? How long were they really spying on me? How long had our government been under the rule of these sick green colored amanto? All I wanted to was to live a quiet life as a journalist but now I had no choice but to follow out their instructions back to Earth. But before that, I knew there was one place I had to go to on Skolex. I went back to my grave. The tombstone was cracked in half after so many decades, the writing on it barely visible and it was covered in dirt and dust. As I examined it closer, I noticed I stepped on something. I picked it up and twisting it between my fingers. That little hope I had to come here was a reality. —- After everything Roberta told Yuka, Roberta took out the yellow wildflower she had saved from visiting her grave two months ago. “Yukes...” Roberta collapsed in her arms and hugged her around her weak waist. She buried her face in Yuka’s shoulder, a warm sensation they both forgot about in countless decades. Yuka was taken back, her arms just laid at her side. “Those universe guys. Look those gods, those Altana freaks. They really fucked up my life pretty badly, huh? Bringing life back to a corpse like a light switch on and off? Yuka, please tell me you finally believe who I say I am now with all this physical proof. Please believe I changed..” “R-Roberta..” Yuka stared in the distance of the blinding white snowing mountains mixed with the cloudly purple skies as the flakes fell all around and over the two women’s huddled bodies. Yuka felt her eyes uncontrollably streaming down tears, very unusual for her. “I..don’t know what to say.. like at all.. This is a lot to take in..” “I know..” Roberta let go of her and tried to regained her composure, wiping away her tears. “But we have a common enemy right now to worry about, do we not?” Yuka nodded her head and wiped away her own tears. “Damn the human mammals, damn those Tendoshu mammals even more.” She felt more pain at her sides and collasped but Roberta caught her. “You’re still very injured from the fight. Your goo is causing flunctations from your degrading solid core. You need to rest. That cabin I mentioned, I believe its somewhere close here. If I can take you to it.” Roberta managed to carry the weak woman on her shoulder as they begun to slowly trunge through feet of snow. The sounds of the fight below them. They reached Shouyou’s cabin and entered inside the house untouched for nearly a year now. Roberta placed Yuka on the couch and used the same blanket Shouyou had wrapped Roberta in the past. Roberta smiled a little as stroked the blonde hairs that came out of Yuka’s previously slicked back head. “I’m sorry.” Yuka called out but just looked down. The tone of her voice was one of someone trying to reassure the other person of everything that had happened. Roberta swallowed a huge emotional lump as her eyes watered. Roberta sat on the other side of the couch as Yuka drifted off in sleep. The darkness of the room felt soothing to Roberta, it looked like it was starting to snow harder outside. ———— Back at the woods, Josh and Steve back to back with Hitsugi and Stephen as they kept slashing back the Skolex. They were using thick branches that fell off the trees as their notebooks still won’t working. Stephen’s leg was finally regaining its strength from some of Hitsugi’s blood. He was able to stand up all the way now and gave a hefty punch to one of them in the face. Steve looked impressed and made a little smile, which Stephen returned. “I have so many questions Mr. Harvestein!” Steve kicked at another worm. “Like what was it like working with my parents, how long did you have the comic book before it came alive? What was it like becoming the first person from the outside world inside of it?!” “Please, Mr. Harvestein? That’s something Enshou would call me if he had the chance.” Stephen chuckled, Steve was confused but kept on eagerly grinning. “Call me Stephen! And I’ll have all the time in the world to answer your questions, little Stevey. If we make it out of here in one piece.” Stephen borrowed some of Hitsugi’s poisonus Naraku needles and flung them at a beast. Steve and Josh grabbed some of their own and followed. “Mr. Ha- Stephen, I’ve been barely coming to this book for three months but I just want to say you’re a hero to me!” Josh exclaimed. Stephen caught a quick glimpse of the young man and smiled. “Why I would recognize that smile from anywhere, you wouldn’t happen to be related to Steve’s mother Annabelle would you?” Stephen and Hitsugi roundhouse kicked another one in the stomach. “Yeah! That’s my mother’s big sister actually.” Josh beamed. He regained his composure and barely dodged another Skolexian snapping at him. “Aah that family, a bunch of poker addicts and gamblers.” Stephen was casually holding back the mouth of one with his bare hands, Hitsugi made a look of disturbance. Speaking of addicts, Billy and Joe were still riding their worm. Ramming the other ones in their path. “Hey dude have you lost No Nut yet?” Joe asked the god. “I won’t answer anything, you’ll have to contact my Head-y Attorney.” Billy crossed his arms. Jazzy shook his head at them and heard a noise. He turned around and squinted his eyes at the distance of a crowd of pointy earred Amantos. Some of the Skolex worms turned towards them as they got closer and looked puzzled. A few of them morphed into humanoids to converse with them. “The Globberians?! What are you doing here? We’re not suppose to fight with you, we’re suppose to be allies!” One called out. “Why are you all invading our planet?” Skele put his hands on his fleshly hips. “Your leader Majesty Yuka teamed up with Roberta, the Tendoshu chose them to work with each other! Come on, you didn’t know this?” Another Skolex exclaimed in disbelief. “T-Tendoshu..?” Mutsu turned her head to Skele by her side. Hitsugi could see some commotion going on in the distance with the Globberians and Skolex. He pointed to the Captain who in turn pointed to Steve and Josh. “Listen you globs. We’re getting our share end of this deal with the Tendoshu with or without you.” Another one said and his fellow Skolex cheered him on. Skele and his kind looked taken back. “We’ve had enough of their controlling torture. This planet’s humans will be enough neural energy to last for decades.” Another one chimed in and the Skolex started to cheer even louder. They begun to slowly walk to the Globberians to corner them. Steve, Josh, Stephen and Hitsugi were scrapping by at this point, their energies were running low and weren’t sure how long they could continue this without the detectives powers. Stephen was starting to fade in and out and didn’t notice a worm was sneaking up behind him. Josh took noticed and pointed to it. “STEPHEN!” He yelled out. But it was too late for the Captain to move. So out of instinct, Josh leaped and intercepted the monster as it grabbed josh up by his left leg and started to play with him like a chew toy. “JOOOOSH!” Steve and Stephen loudly yelled out. Joe could hear this from the distance he was at. He pushed Billy off and grabbed a hold of the reigns to high tail to there. He rammed the other worm and it released his cousin out of its jaw. Steve caught him but gasped out loudly at all the blood coming from his body. Joe held his mouth in shock as Stephen and Hitsugi did the same. “M-MY LEG, IT’S GONE!!” Josh screamed as blood was gushing out of the tiny nub left at his hip. “Please! We can work this out! We can find you another source of energy, we can free you of the Tendoshu like we did on Koukan! You don’t have to resort to killing off the humans here!” Skele pleaded with the angry crowd, they had backed up him and the crowd of Globberian soldiers to a pine tree. “Hey, I heard Globberians are quite rich of neural energy with those two morphed minds of theirs.” One of the Skolex licked their lips and the others followed. Suddenly another foresight image came into Skele’s mind. A picture of sleeping Yuka in a cabin of sorts with someone who he couldn’t make out. “Sorella!” Valentino instantly demorphed with the man and quickly slithered off. “VALENTINO! WAIT!” Skele yelled out. “Sorry Skels but I have a feeling if I don’t do something over there things are gonna get much worse over here! I believe in you guys!” He yelled out and disappeared in the thick fog of the snow. ———- Roberta had fallen asleep on the other end of the couch, it was nearly dark when she heard a voice calling from outside. She got up from the couch and cautiously made her way to the front door. She opened it up and saw a green glob of goo. “R-Roberta..” Valentino said. Roberta’s expression changed to one of bitter hate. “Get lost Valentino, she doesn’t want to see you. Sound familiar?” She put her hand on the door and started to close it but Valentino transformed into a door stopper. “I don’t know if that was truly you back then more than I do right now. But I have to see Yuka, what did you do to her?” Valentinoi was getting a lot more serious in his tone now. “I SAID SHE DOESN’T WANT TO SEE YOU!” Roberta then reverted back to her natural state and lunged at Valentino who turned back into goo and dodged out of the way into the snow. Roberta turned around and went to charge on him again. He turned into a brick wall but Roberta’s impact had broke it easily. He transformed back to goo and his body was scattered about but he quickly formed himself together and coughed some green liquid up. The woman then transformed into a sword and stabbed Valentino through his goo but he morphed into an open hole in a wall and flung her out. “If you hurt Yuka in anyway I swear!” Valentino exclaimed, he turned into a sword of his own. “I DIDN’T HURT HER!” Roberta said as the two clashed as katanas. “All you could ever think about is overprotecting her! You didn’t trust me when we went on that mission in space together and you didn’t trust me when I said I came back to change for good!” “You were gonna destroy the solids! And then yous magically come back to life decades later? What the hell do you want me to say Roberta?!!” Valentino exclaimed. He took another swipe and managed to cut off the blade of herself. She brought herself back together and morphed back into a worm, coughing up some dark liquid. She screeched a horrendous sound causing Yuka to snap awake from inside the cabin. “R-Roberta..?” Yuka softly said, she sat up from the couch and started to stand up despite the pains and unstableness of her body. “YOU DON’T KNOW ME AT ALL VALENTINO! AND YOU DON’T KNOW MY INTENTIONS, YOU NEVER HAVE AND YOU NEVER WILL!” Roberta charged at him now with full force as a memory popped into her head of over seventy years ago. Roberta was sitting on the steps of the Skolexian Council building. She was rubbing her head, regretting to go inside for another day at the office for a plan to infiltrate another planet. “I’ll never get to live life as a true journalist if I’m called at the whim of my species slithering asses.” She tossed down the papers and watched the wind dance them farther and farther. She looked down for a few moments only to see someone’s European leathered shoes. “Ayee, yous drop your papers toots?” “Oh, thanks.” Roberta then proceeded to crumble them all up and toss her over her shoulder, causing Valentino to laugh a bit. “Say, bad day at the office?” He sat down next to her and imitated the same depressive slumping expression she was doing. She looked over at him and chuckled and sat up. “Say you’re that royal from Globbus, Valentino! I always keep up on other planets news. What are you doing here?” Roberta asked him he just put his hands up expressively. “Me royal? Naah, that’s more my little godsista’s speed. I’m just here cus she was tired of my unemployed rear end ‘n forced me to look for a job here after I rejected so many on our planet.” He put his arms behind his head. “I have more of a feeling they rejected you, hot shot.” She joked and he teasingly put his hand on her shoulder. “You know I like you or maybe with my sorella’s stotic personality anythin’ is a fresh breath of air.” He chuckled again as Roberta smiled. They both got up from the steps and were walking up. “Yous somehow already knew my name, now how about yours, bud?” “Roberta. Sure, I don’t have many buddies anyways, worms you know. Cold blooded.” She shrugged it off but Valentino could tell underneath she was feeling hurt. “Well I don’t mind a wormy friend, I’ve always had an interest on otha world’s cultures! Maybe after we spend a depressive day at this office, we can get a drink, on me!” Valentino smiled. Roberta felt genuinely touched. “You think they’d hire someone like you with that much moose in your do, slick?” She playfully elbowed him and they continued into the building. Roberta in present day knocked him over as he held back her jaw with his gooey self. “Don’t ruin yaself Roberta! You want to prove ya changed, then stop this violence!” He pleaded out but she wouldn’t listen. “R-Roberta?” Yuka rubbed her sleepy eyes as she was standing in the doorway. She clung on its side to avoid falling. Yuka’s vision got clearer, she shook her head to make sure of what she was seeing. “VALENTINO?” Roberta continued to press her weight at the glob, he was unable to morph with all this strain on his body. “VALENTINO!” Yuka yelled out. She started to run to them despite her injuries and begun morphing as something to stop Roberta. That’s when suddenly, she heard loud cracks in her body, her eyes flicked all the way open. She reverted back to being a glob as Sophia’s broken into several pieces skeleton laid next to her. She was falling in and out of consciousness from the aching strain of shards inside of her but dragged her gooey through the snow and howling wind. Valentino could no longer hold his body against the strain. Roberta sunk her teeth into him and teared him part from part. Before Valentino could muster up any energy to bring himself together she morphed into a flame thrower and torced his body into black ashes. Roberta turned back into a humanoid and displayed a darkened face. She begun walking away from the crime scene down the mountain, her expression changing from darken to extreme regret. The words of Utsuro were loudly ringing in the back of her mind. “Hate and resentment will be your permanent downfall if you let it consume you.” “What.. have I done..” She flipped open to a book she had took from the cabin while Yuka was asleep. It was some ancient latin, something Billy once told her in the past Utsuro used to reset the universe. She quickly fled to the green altans containing terminal station to destroy it. Not with the Tendoshu’s goal in mind, but to somehow reverse the effects of her entire life and of what she had just committed, to turn back the universe. Yuka regained consciousness after several minutes. It was howling even louder now and it was pitch black outside now except for the moon illuminating on the mountain. She continued to drag herself through the terribly cold snows and saw what appeared to be a pile of ashes. “V...Valen..” She slithered right next up to it. “Valen.. Valen.. VALENTINO!!!!” TBC
  11. Cha

    Ask Dark

    favorite movie?
  12. “Ram On” - Paul and Linda McCartney
  13. “Hello I’m your host, Roberta with Sky 9 News filling in for Robert as always after he turned out to be some kind of weird giant worm creature! Breaking news as Kawakami Bansai, lead singer and guitarist of worldwide famous, Exploding Feminism has just announced his departure from the group! Today we are doing a fully detailed documentary complete with several interviews from the band and their associates themselves in various locations from our camera men. Let’s rush into the explosion now with camera one!” “I told Poochie I wasn’t gonna take any interviews until Bansai agrees to remarry me...” He whined. “But didn’t you break off the marriage, Prince?” A camera man said off screen. The prince stopped for a moment and started to sob again he gestered for his sercuity guards to usher them out of there. The camera switched to another location. A woman was continously furiously playing two of the highest sounding keys with her two fingers. “Of COURSE Senpai has to ruin every thing we’ve strived for over a year! Does ANYONE remember how he was like before the band? He wasn’t some egotistical pothead acting clown..” Her fingers begun to quake as she still held down onto the keys. She then slammed down her fists onto the entire thing, causing a loud and ugly sound. “I-I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING BUT THIS STUPID BAND! BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?! BANSAI LEAVING WAS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO US! THAT LOW DOWN PIECE OF S-“ The director gestured a finger to his neck for the boom mic operator to cut off his device to prevent censor issues. But the staff could hear a loud thumping coming from next door. The director ushered them to find out what was going on. “The censors will be destroyed..” The director had them quickly all leave the room, skipping this said interview. They went into another room on the ship as the camera switched to the Edo Castle with the princess. “Well technically Bansai~~~ and I weren’t married yet but if Hata can get to be called his ex then I can threaten as many producers of your series to have that be my label as I want!” “Bansai-dono has always had an independent spirit ever since I met him all those years ago. A noble but at times obviously conceitable gentleman. At least with the band over with, it will allow me and Matako-chan to pursue a rela-“ Takechi dropped off his bed as he was met with swarms of bullet rounds coming from someone off screen at his bedroom door. The camera switched to a police man inside his station. “WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THIS TITLE?!” Yamazaki yelled out and then he started pushing the cameras away. “INTERVIEW IS OVER!!” It then panned to some random maid working at a local bar not that far away in the city. “Me? Bansai’s Rival-in-Love?” Tama said confused on what it even meant. “I don’t remember talking to Bansai-sama except that one instance in 3-Z banter some time ago where he wore a mask that looked like my face. I must admit, I do go ‘beep boo boop sometimes!” She smiled and put a hand to her face to chuckle. The camera then turned back to the ship. -I burned all that traitor’s stuff in our room. Or should I say my room.- The scene cut to the recording studio booth Otae Records© , a label run by Yagyuu Kyuubei. “I will not speak for Bansai-dono’s inexcusable actions on half of my and my band right now. You will have to contact my lawyers.” The screen zoomed out to reveal Jugem (the og!) on a typewriter with an oversized pair of secretary glasses on. Roberta then had the screen again back in the news studio. “And now a word from the man everyone is talking about, himself!” Roberta was now sitting in a chair, on the opposite end of Bansai. She straightened up her papers and sat cross legged. Now Bansai, what brought you to the decision to leave the band?” “That would be Sexiest Bachelor 9 months in a row.. Anyway, I just thought it was the right time to go, you know. I had the feeling for several months that they were holding me back, ruining the flow of my melody. So I finally just went with it, man.” “Amazing. How do you think your parents will react to this decision?” Roberta said with the upmost journalism intrigue. “Oh I’m sure they’re proud of me.” Bansai replied. “Haha, now with all the important topics out of the way. What are your plans to do next, Bansai?” Roberta asked, the singer smirked a little. As Bansai begun easing his way into the conversation topic, a remote was flung at the screen of a tv at home watching the event by an angry monkey. The rest of EF and their manager were sitting around the living room of Kyuubei’s home. Kyuubei’s dad had given them some healthy snacks. “He made us look like fools.. After everything we went through. After all we accomplished together after starting from the very bottom..” Matako started to flashback, along with her fellow bandmates. Fuck you, Senpai..” Matako clenched her fists but soon enough dropped her face into her hands in sorrow. -THAT’S IT! I’M BURNING MY DRUM SET!- Elizabeth knocked over his carrots and ranch dressing and he shot up hysterical from the couch. But he was met by a hard slap across his costume cheek by their manager and fell to the floor. “Dragonia if you go hysterical on me now I’ll have someone replace you in a heart beat.” Kyuubei pointed at him as he quickly nodded frighten. “I feared this. I knew it was coming, I have been observing Bansai-dono’s behavior for months.” “What do you propose we do now, Kyuubei-dono?” Takechi said as he pet Jugem in his lap. “Throw Bansai to the side just as he did with us.” Kyuubei pointed to the door of the living room as it was swung open and a famous singer emerged out of it, a bright light protruding behind the person.“Coincidentally she’s also under our record label, although ever starting the band, Bansai didn’t seem to do much producing anymore with her before he gave up the rights to yours truly. His loss and our gain.”’ Kyuubei said and the other band members looked in pure awe. “Hey guys! Wow, my first TBC appearance! sensei foreskin!” Otsuu beamed and then threw up a peace sign next to her eye. ——————- Guano was sleeping on the floor of a temporary residence all cozy up when someone flipped all the lights on, scaring the midget silly. “AFTER HALLOWEEN PARTY TIME!” Brozu exclaimed and suddenly a whole crowd of people appeared and danced in the old man’s apartment somewhere in Tokyo. Sleepily annoyed Guano got up, dragging his pillow across the floor as he did so. He went to go use the bathroom but saw Raj, Lily, Mitsuki and Front Desk Lady all jammed like sardines in there from when they threw them in there to save space. Raj scrambled up from his rubber ducky empty bathtub and shouted out, “I DEMAND MY LAWY-“ Guano slammed the door and decided to head to the kitchen for a snack. There he ran in with a mutual enemy. “Yeah we’re gonna have to find a better living condition than this, old man.” Guano looked around at the moldy and rusted environment of the room. “And where the hell is Oboro and that money making pet bird of his. I’M BLAMING BALDY FOR ANY MISFORTUNE I’LL EVER HAVE IN THE FUTURE! Yes I said future, so I can’t blame him for mistakes like you.” Ozu pointed to his diseased purple child. “Come on man, the author actually puts effort into caring about us in years and this is how you start our subplot?” Guano wrapped himself in his blanky and warmed his costume hands up. Kiyoko then came in and yawned while opening the fridge. “Can you believe we’re actually getting a solo subplot in insert current-year?” She asked and pulled out Yes Man whose mouth she used as a root beer bottle opener. That’s what you think SquarePants but it’s not over yet! The author changed it to more hip, young and totally not shoved aside for screen time in the past several arcs. “I’m gonna kill you author.” Kamui smiled at me. “HA! We’re here boys and glitches. THE BEST TACO PLACE IN THE UNIVERSE, YAR HARR WEIXCO!!” “Chief, why did we flee all the way from Asia to North America.” No Man said as the truck driver guy dumped a can of lard on his plate onto his empty tacos. It splattered all over his (sticky) face. He daringly took a bit of it on his finger and into his mouth. “Huh, not bad.” Kamui, Abuto and Monika were sitting at the tables, he momentarily joined them. “Because No Dick, I wanted some down time away with me crew!” Kamui exclaimed and took a swish of some Wexican red slurp. “And that old man’s attorneys and the authorities were coming at us for arson. Plus the arson from Wix Flags.” Abuto was met with a beefy burrito to slapped across his ossan face. “Something tells me you learned that meaty smack from a Samurai.” Kamui grabbed his ossan scruff of his cape at this and spoke out with a grin, “One more word out of my first mate and he gets his sexy redesign look thrown out of the photoshopped photo!” “Oh come on Chief it can’t possibly-“ The ossan started. “Yare yare... my poor 150,000 dollar plastic surgery.” Abuto shook his “natural state” head. “HA!” “You know I like this subplot!” Monika exclaimed. “The authors work so hard on chapters these days that it’s kind of nice for us to lighten up their load sometimes! I feel like I’m in 1.0 or something!” “You are so adorable.” Abuto beamed about his girlfriend but he waited for some commentary back. “Huh, must be the other author. Finally.” He put his arm around her knowing the author in question could do nothing but read this when Monday came for him. 4th and Ham-san came up to the table and were able to set down their trays. “Hey did the cook give you guys burritos of literally just a block of greas-“ “YOU CAN’T SIT WITH US!” No Man yelled and Kamui gave him a loud high five. 4th gave the, a dirty look and continued with his husband to the tables with the lower subordinates. Unknownst to the pirate gang, a police car was coming up. But not to arrest them, it was to parade around some royals for a school field trip. It had taken three days by eliteo plane, eliteo boat and eliteo car to get to Mexico. Sadaharu and Hata’s dog Poochie rode on top of the car as the Isaburo and Sougo looked behind them at their “carry-ons”. “Little kids love me.” Hasegawa smiled. “Disgusting, west coast rap.” Sougo shook his coconut head. “Consider it a payback for the wedding.” Isaburo said with his hands at the wheel. Not even some old jams playing could cheer up Izzy Cube from being forced to ride with a black coat. “I can’t believe I was forced to go on yet another roadtrip. First Joe-danna’s dream, then that stupid baby shower’s, the ride back to Edo for the wedding and now this.” Sougo said looking out the window, looking more bored than emo for once. “Wait, what do you mean by Joe’s dream?” Hasegawa wondered but Sougo ignored him and continued. “And now with a smelly white coat. Where’s that annoying blue haired freak of yours anyway?” Sougo stared outside the dry terrains of the countryside, interally counting all the cactuses as they went by. Isaburo rolled his eliteo eyes but before he could speak up, the backseat did again. “Nobume-chan texted me she would have loved to travel on this road to nowhereeee but she was super duper sick!” Soyo exclaimed of her sadist sister trio buddy. Meanwhile Nobume was in her bedroom she opened up the window and begun climbing out of it and down a rope. She evilly snickered as she ran away, her plan to escape to the main subplot to get some gooey and detective action was in motion. Isaburo felt his eliteo dad senses tingling of a disturbance but shrugged it off and continued to drive. “Yeah real sick in the head! You three all have terrible taste in TBC men! Detective cherry boys and tree heads, uh-huh!” Kagura took a bite of a fried chicken wing as Soyo and Hata both narrowed their eyes at the second one mentioned. “As if that Billy guy is any better, Kagura-chan.” Soyo crossed her arms annoyed. Hata nodded and did the same. “You two are ganging up on me when you’ve been totally third-wheeling me the entire last couple of arcs. You hate what I say because it’s the truth.“ Kagura took a bite of a chicken leg. “That’s not true Kagura-chan, I love you! You’re both my best friends!” Soyo smiled and reassured her. “I meant the truth about that green haired doofus.” Kagura said. Soyo shook her head and took a wing out of the bin. Kagura handed her the ketchup. “Straight A+ on my history report on Wexico culture here I come! Right Hasegawa?” Hata stuck another rainbow sticker below his sunglasses. Hasegawa just chuckled a little in return. “WEXICAN FOOD!!” Kagura shouted out as she saw a taco truck parked in the middle of the desert. She unbuckled her seat belt, forced the door open of the speeding car and tumbled out of it. “KAGURRAAA-CHAAAAN!” Soyo yelled out. She then tumbled out of the car as well. Hasegawa looked on frantically in the backseat. “SOYO-CHAAAAN!” Hata followed Soyo and did the same thing out of the car. “NOOOOO! WHAT DID THEY DO? AND WHY DID KAGURA-CHAN NEED TO GET TACOS? SHE ALREADY HAD WFC!” Hasegawa shouted out, assuming all three kids were dead. Isaburo and Sougo just shrugged and turned the car around. Them and the dogs got out/off of the car and walked to the food truck. Unknowst to themon the opposite side where Kamui and his gang were. Kagura, Soyo and Hata in that order were already lined up, with scratches and bruises on them. Madao shook his head and got in line. When he reached the front, some kind of weird black slimey thing from the tinted out window handed his order to him. It dinged the bell and went back inside. “D-Did you guys see a slimey tentacle or whatever thing deliver your food?” Hasegawa said as he sat down with the others at the picnic table while the dogs were on the floor with their meals. “I love pets with slimey arms, that’s why I picked Poochie! He was from some deserted planet and was the last of his kind. How sad.” Hata took a bite of his veggie burrito. In the background Poochie tried to swallow Sadaharu whole but the giant white dog swiped him with his paw. “Uhh.. I think I know why he’s the last of his kind, Prince.” Hasegawa silently commented. “Great choice of a pitstop, Kagura!” Soyo smiled as she took a bite of her monsterous double wrapped chicken burrito. Kagura grinned back with a mouthful of rolled tacos. Sougo then reached for the jalapeño table fries and incidentally put his hand on top of Hata’s. “O-oh sorry.” Sougo retracted his hand. Hata just shrugged and took a bunch for his plate. Sougo sighed out. He rested his chin on his hand and looked down for a while and took a single fry out of the bowl. “Oi Coconut Head, what’s been eating you all this time on this trip?” Kagura asked the man. “I just wanted to talk to him- oops.” Sougo accidentally said. Kagura put two and two together and then bursted out hysterically, “AAAAAAAAAHHHAAAHAHA! Do you want to shove your bazooka inside his princely bubblegum? BUBBLEGUM BAZOOKA BAZOOKA BUBBLEGUM!” Sougo threw his tamale at her face. Everyone stared at her as the soggy corn item slipped down her chin and landed in her lap. “WHYY I OUGHTTA!” Kagura rolled up her sleeve to reveal a Popeye like muscle with a bunny symbol on it from all the eggs on rice she had been eating the past years. She punched Sougo right in the stomach, sending him to slam into the truck. The impact of his body left a big dent in it, causing the Amanto inside to momentarily get angry. “Foodfight!” Soyo shouted out. She and Hata playfully threw fries at each other as the dogs were doing tug-a-war some abnormally large spicy chicken bone. Sougo and Kagura were fighting each other in a cartoonish smoke cloud. Isaburo just sat there completely still with a bored expresson and just casually texting Nobume-san on what she was missing. Madao looked concerned next to his fellow ossan. “Hey, they’re getting pretty violent in there. That black coat looks like he lost a few teeth!” Madao pointed to the cloud of smoke but Isaburo ignored him still. The cloud was moving closer towards then now, Hasegawa in a hurry tried getting up from the table but his legs were stuck in some weird lard puddle from beneath the table. The cloud hit the table globbling up everything but surprisingly not touching Isaburo. He looked unphased and was still texting. “AAAH HELP ME!” Madao cried out. “What the hell is goin’ on the other side of this truck?” No Man wondered. “Sounds like a bunch of hearty FUN! people. We should join them!” Kamui exclaimed. “Eh, we really should be heading back. As much as I like to madly chill with my girlfriend.” Abuto once again winked to the person reading this. “HEADING BACK? HA! In your dreams Ossan. We’re staying here for as long as it takes for us to be banned from this country from something I personally caused!” Kamui jammed his fork into something that looked like a fried foot and ate it all in one bite. “Fine you little redhead brat, come to me in two days when our bills for our little Rampaging Rabbits merchants business rockets sky high.” Abuto took another bite of his disgusting soggy fish head tacos. Kamui just simply grinned bigger and pulled out a boombox. “Ossan, I think this song personally fits the vibe you’re crusty ass is giving me right now.” He hit play. “Chief, the Big Man does have a point. We’ve been in major debt ever since we had to do the recent taxes of your slurps.” “And I think this one fits you better, Short Balls!” Kamui clicked on another button on the music device. “Come on, dog.” No Man shook his head in disapproval. Abuto and No Man then collapsed off theor chairs from chronic food poisoning. Still smiling Kamui turned to his glitch of many talents. “Oh those boys never learn, do they Chief?” She smiled back. “HA, you make me laugh you bow wearing computer virus. Anyway, I’m just glad I finally killed that stupid eggyhead. Good riddance to a useless and weak character such as that!” He nodded to his own words. Meanwhile two dudes were having a major roadtrip of their own. The cyborg was driving the sleeping bald man. “Sensei, what are we doing in the Americas?” Genos asked his master who snapped awake. “We’re on the run from the authorites for arson and that old man. Even though it was totally Kamui’s fault for this whole damn mess he caused. Plus this place has a particular killer taco truck somewhere I’ve heard!” Saitama looked all over the dry land for it while Genos pulled out a piece of jewelry around neck. “Heart shaped locket of Sensei, this is the best day of my life.” He said, Saitama looked a bit disturbed but was used to his antics by now. ———————- These three days later, Yuka was now on Skolex, it was a planet in same solar system as Globbus. She was waiting outside a pair of large doors to speak in front of a crowd of individuals. Her mind begun to drift during the long wait, she put her hand over her gooey heart, inside her jacket a pocket book near to her heart. Little Yuka and Sophia were running down the dusty streets of the Globbus village, in and out of morphing with each other, giggling all the way. The villagers there either didn’t notice them or peered at them with confusion. The two girls were living in a time where the solids and liquids were mostly at odds at each other for a struggle of power. This village in particular was very segregated, but this didn’t matter to the orphaned girls. They passed by several solids, waving to them as they went through. “Those children have no idea of what their elders are going through..” An older woman skeleton shook her head as she sweeped her hut. The two finally reached the outskirts of the village and kept running as they reached their favorite spot in the whole wide world, a long stretched path of yellow flowers. They finally fell down and panted. They unmerged with each other and laid at each other’s side. Sophia pulled out a pocket book she used to write in for basically everything, especially poetry. She held up a yellow flower for Yuka to see. “See Yuka? These are wildflowers but most people call them weeds. But to me they’re much more than that, they’re absolutely beautiful and bright.” Sophia twirled the one between her boney fingers. “They’re like a lot of people here, looked down upon and unnoticed, even called ugly. And whenever someone tries to pull them out to get rid of them, they just grow stronger twisted back in places where people don’t want them to go. You and me, no matter how much they try to uproot us, we stay together.” Sophia then pit the flower on top of Yuka’s goo and giggled. “Glob glob!” Yuka exclaimed cheerfully. Yuka in present day made a little warm smile recalling one of the most precious moments of her long life, her hand was still clutched on the pocket book. Her smile faded though, remembering the short time later that haunting evening when the fatal accident occured. “What’s wrong sorellas?!” “FRATELLO, SOPHIA CAN’T BREATH INSIDE OF ME!!” Current Yuka’s chest begun to clench at this echo of words but shook her head. She has heard her name being called out to come inside the doors. She walked inside the enormous chambers, a society of hooded Amanto surrounding her. “Majesty Yuka, why do you insult us, the Society of the Skolex, likened brethren to your species like this with your deformed shapeshifting abilities?” One of the hooded Skolex started out very bluntly. Under any other circumstances she would have come unleashed but this was a desperate time and measures. “It is due to something that happened a long time ago. It hinders my abilities to shapeshift or turn back into goo for that long without crushing what’s left of the solid left inside of me.” She explained to the man. “Proceed with your statements.” A woman said. “A simple but similar thing regarding the situations of both our planets keeps on happening. Your people have always suffered from a famine.” Yuka paced around with her hands behind her back, trying to intrigue them enough to her selling point. “My people have always suffered from poverty which turns into famine in time as well. A whole planet of life sustaining humans and their riches, it would benefit both the Skolex and the Globberians don’t you think?” “You know your Majesty that we have attempted an infiltration of Earth before and backfired on us tremendously.” Another said to her. “Yes I know. But right now Earth is at a critical low defense. This would be an excellent time for you to send in operatives again.” Yuka told the council. “What would you want in return, Globberian? It has been many years since we’ve last seen you here on Skolex.” The man in the middle said. “Safety for my people residing on Earth as your own people invade.” Yuka requested. “What makes you think they wouldn’t be apart of our purge, Globberian?” Another one told her. Yuka didn’t back down even for a moment, she quickly replied. “Because I’ve heard on the street that the Skolex to say very plainly, are in currently in league with particular group of clients who are to be thanked for Edo’s poor current state. And if said clients get said Altana, I’m sure they will grant us great profit to both our species. And with my foresight, I am the only one able to know where the crystals exactly are.” There was a brief talk amongst them all until one of them spoke up again. “Return to Earth, we’ll let to know when we make our first move. There will be an agent down there to meet you.” They said. As Yuka ascended down the steps, she kept hearing Sophia’s words at the back of her head. At the bottom stair, she made sure no one was looking before she pulled out a journal staring at the wilted yellow flower from within. The book was open to a page Sophia wrote about love, the things she understood about it, the things she didn’t and what she hoped in the future for her people to be able to grasp it. Yuka took a deep sigh before she put the book back in her jacket pocket and called for a taxi. Her mind started to flashback again, this time about seventy years ago. ————- She was on the same staircase this time with Valentino. Instead of the planet’s council, this building during that time had been some kind of journalist newspaper company. Another woman was hastily rushing down it towards them. She purposefully almost knocked Yuka down. Yuka pushed her off as the woman and Valentino laughed. “Damn journalists, what do they know, huh baby girl? I fail at one big scoop and now those morons got on my case. Extra, read all about it, this woman here is PISSED!” She pointed to herself overdramatically. “I told you not to call me baby girl.” Yuka simply straighten her tie, the same stone face she usually had. “Which eye told you to tell me not to say that? Cuz I’m looking at both of them and they say, newsflash!” The woman exclaimed and put her hand on the gooey side of Yuka’s face with a cheeky grin. “Hey, I never said your face was a bad thing. I like it, gives off a Bride of Frankenstein’s Monster look.” She joked and Yuka slapped the woman’s hand off her face as Valentino chuckled. “I don’t see what’s funny about you insulting my face.” Yuka gave her a sour look and narrowed her eyes further. “But then again you always find ways to insult me one way or the other.” “Aww come on, you know she’s just pullin’ ya gooey leg, sorella.” Valentino chimed in. “Yeah I’m really sorry, I was kidding you know Yukes. I’ve always thought it was kind of cute. Man, I can definitely tell you need a break from Globbus. Your sense of humor is almost as worst as your godbrother’s.” She joked. “Ayy, what’s that suppose to mean, youse Lauren Bacall wannabe?” Valentino crossed his arms. Yuka actually managed to chuckle a little. She then stared at the building before looking back at her friend. “Forget those paper jockeys for now, how about we get a drink back on Globbus?” Yuka suggested and the woman nodded. “Ayy! Great! Drinks are on me!” Valentino clapped his hands together. “Yeah, because you won’t have to worry about paying for yours because you can barely drink.” Yuka lit up a cigar and then put her hands in her suit pockets. Valentino narrowed his eyes. “Actually I was thinking of somewhere local. I decided to apply for a new job just in case this one went sour. I mean, it’s not something I’d normally pick but hey, it pays!” Their friend shrugged. “Aight, aight. But YOUS payin’ Roberta.” Valentino said and then raised his arm up to call cab. Roberta had directed the driver to some kind of fancy restaurant and bar, it was reaching the twilight hour of Skolex. They departed from Roberta momentarily as she was preparing for her job there as a singer. Meanwhile Yuka and Valentino looked around at the bustling joint and took some seats up at the bar near the stage. “Yous ever heard Roberta sing, sorella?” Valentino said and downed some Italian sparkling cider. Yuka scoffed. “You’re not gonna even put on an act for everyone here by ordering some alcohol?” Yuka said to her godsibling. “Ay, as far as those pasainos know this is the most luxurious sparklin’ champagne their lil’ wild eyes laid upon.” Valentino scoffed and flicked the glass and as it made a dinging noise. “Ain’t that right Rickbones? This guy, 120 years old and somehow still kickin’. Thanks for the body again, old man!” Valentino proceeded to get slapped in the face by himself. “But anyway, no I didn’t even know she could sing. Then again, we’ve only known her for not even a year yet.” Yuka took another sip of her brandy. Valentino smirked and teasingly pulled her cheek. The curtain opened and Roberta appeared in in a more sultry attire that caught the eyes of Yuka through the view of her glass cup she was drinking. She put it down for a moment and slightly tilted her head. “A-author, can we get this in color instead of black and white?” Yuka asked. “And you didn’t want her to call you baby girl. You’re practically drooling over her mammal shapeshift!” Valentino was then painfully slugged in the arm by his godsister’s gooey fist. Yuka rested her head in her hand as she kept watching Roberta, a smile on the majesty’s face all the while. Valentino eventually was just looking at his wrist’s clock. Roberta finally finished her songs, everyone around her standing up and clapping. Yuka still sat there in the same position and Valentino hastily got up. “Oop, suspenders with a five o’clock just arrived. As my fellow romance languages say, asta la vista baby!” He sped off in a dash to the front door as Roberta walked over to the bar and wiped herself off with a towel. “Great performance out there.” Yuka stood up and shook her hand very professionally and platonically. “I’ll say, it even got you to smile for once!” Roberta exclaimed. Some men around the bar were smirking at Roberta and offered her some drinks as they circled around the two. “Maybe we should move this back to my place.” Yuka suggested and Robera nodded. They headed back to the castle on Globbus as Yuka poured her and Roberta some brandy in a square glass cups. Yuka leaned in her recliner, swirling around her drink in her hand. A rare moment of peace she had, let alone with anyone else around her. “Nice study you have in this office.” Roberta looked around at vintage wooden room, several library cases of dusty old century books that ranged of topics from philosophy to astronomy to automotive engineering. The ticking sound of the clock on top of the faded with time golden trimmed mantle stuck out, as did the crackling flames of the fireplace itself. “I assume you don’t take most people here, your Majesty. It’s awfully lovely.” “Thank you. And yes, you’re one of the few.” Yuka took a sip of her brandy and then placed the hand with the cup down on the tiny tables next to each of their chairs. “So do you think you’re gonna go professional as a singer?” Yuka joked, Roberta just smiled. Suddenly a man walked in the office room. “The dude had a dame.” Valentino said with a depressed look and slammed the door behind them, causing Yuka to tense up and accidentally spill some of the drink in her hand. He took Yuka’s drink from out of her hand and took a couple of swigs of it before hacking out. “Way too strong, sorella.” Her eyes narrowed. “Better luck next time eh moose hair?” Roberta chuckled. “Hopefully, if my foresight doesn’t betray me this time.” He slumped in a couch chair and flicked on the TV to boxing. “Yeah, you know Valentino my foresight says get out of this room before I shapeshift into a grizzly bear to claw your eyes out.” Yuka stated. “But you act grizzly all the time, sorella!” Yuka proceeded to chuck a pillow at his face. “Aah, I get the message. Family violence, mio dio.” He turned off the tv, walked to the door and closed it behind him. “Who’s this?” Roberta picked up a framed photo of a skeleton on the table with a wildflower on her head. “My solid, Sophia. It’s nothing. Well no, that’s a lie. She’s everything, to uh, me.” Yuka fiddled her left hand with the arm of the chair. “Seemed like a nice kid.” Roberta smiled and put it down. “I’m surprised you didn’t insult her.” Yuka raised her regular eyebrow. “I don’t make habits of insulting someone that important to my friends, baby girl.” Roberta said looking at Yuka surprisingly serious. Yuka just turned her head and coughed. When it was getting pretty late, Yuka walked her out of the castle and called one of the globs to shapeshift into a cab for her to the airport. But before that, Yuka noticed it was starting to snow a bit. “Oh uhh, it is getting pretty cold. Here.” Yuka took off her suit’s jacket and put it over Roberta’s bare arms. “You can totally, like borrow it, if you like.” “Aww man, only borrow it? You that pressed over your whole look?” Roberta asked and Yuka rolled her eyes. Roberta waved her off as she walked down the steps and to the car. Valentino had snuck up behind his sorella and nudged her arm. “Her eyes were up there.” He was eating some gross microwaved italian pocket. “Ayy ragazzo caldo-less clowns don’t get to add their two cents, capeesh?” Yuka mocked him and annoyingly walked away back inside, having the glob guards slam the doors behind her. Valentino just made a hearty laugh. Fastforward to some weeks later, it had been a while since Yuka had the free time to catch up with Roberta but her thoughts raced of her. Roberta had contacted Yuka in hopes to meet together again, Yuka agreed and they met back up at the castle. “Nice record. Do you like big band too, Yukes? The perfect thing to play during gigs.” Roberta was wearing a sweater vest with an ascot and pencil skirt with stockings underneath. Yuka caught herself staring at her knees but shook out of it before the woman caught her. “Big band, jazz and a little bit of swing. As long as I don’t have to hear mammals sing to it.” Yuka said seriously, Roberta just laughed. “So I came here to tell you that I was reinstated for my newspaper!” She said, the majesty made a smile and congratulated her. “But what I’m really here for is that I’ve been hearing some word going around about a subject I think you would be very interested in.” Yuka nodded. “Go on.” She said. “Some locals in the Bungan system claimed to have seen some ships with this logo on it.” Roberta took out a pen and scribbled a symbol on her hand. It was the same skull symbol pin on the majesty’s jacket. “N-no way..” Yuka was completely taken back. She would need to sit down if she wasn’t already. “And I thought, who better to share this than my favorite baby girl.” Roberta smiled but Yuka shook her head and stood up. She looked out the window. “I can’t, Roberta. I very much appreciate however you got this tidbit of information. But I can’t the solids have made up their mind.” Yuka felt on the rectangular journal stowed away inside her jacket. “People can always change their minds. That was like, what? Nearly a hundred years ago? Yuka.” Roberta stood up behind her. “Pardon another journalist pun but news flash, there’s whole new generations of solids out there. Don’t you think they deserve a real home if they’ve been in ships this long?” Yuka thought long and hard about these words. “Their families probably made up their minds for them already. No, I can’t rip them away.” Yuka then pouted a little bit. “After me selfishly removing the memories of the solids from the liquids. How could I face them? How could I face..Sophia? How could I-“ Before Yuka could finish her rambling, Roberta turned her around to her, pulled her in and planted a kiss on her lips that lasted several seconds. Yuka was stunned and stood there with her hands up. Roberta mouth finally departed from her own. “..Like I said Yukes, you really need to work on that sense of humor.” Roberta laid her head on her shoulder and her arms around her waist. Yuka finally snapped out of it and put her arms around her. The two spent the next couple of months preparing for a trip deep outside of their home of shapeshifters solar system and into the humaniod Bungan’s. Yuka would be using one of her explorer ships for the mission. Valentino stood outside the ship, his hands on his sister’s shoulders. “Are you ready for your trip, Sorella? Hey be careful out dere. This ain’t no dilly dally day trip you know.” He said protective of her. “We’ll be fine, fratello. I don’t need to worry much since dame is gonna drive me crazy enough. Just take care of Rickbones, alright?” She smiled and playfully punched him in the shoulder. He smiled back and nodded. He watched her as she was led up the ship by several liquid guards, he sighed out. “I really hope so..” Valentino quietly said to himself as him and Rickbones waved goodbye. The women traveled for weeks to reach the Bungan galaxy of hopes of anything on their sensors worth looking for. That’s when it hit them one day out there. Yuka’s pupils shrunk as she saw multiple ships with the same logo as on her jacket pin. “T-the solids..” She stuttered. “Go ahead. Let’s send them a hailing message.” Roberta smiled. Yuka was such in a lost of words and pure happy emotions for the first time in ages, she hadn’t felt some other half to complete her since.. Sophia. Yuka couldn’t help it, she put her hands on Roberta’s face and leaned her in for a kiss, all done by Yuka herself this time. Yuka’s lips departed from Roberta’s and she looked at the journalist with tears ruining down both sides of her face. “I-I can’t thank anyone as much as I can thank you..” Yuka hugged her. “And I can’t thank you enough, baby girl.” Roberta smiled. Then Yuka felt a metallic object pressed up against her back and heard a clicking noise. “W-what..” She slowly said as the music on their vinyl record on the bridge room changed to from swinging jazz to one of Roberta’s favorites. They broke free of the hug, Roberta held the gun of her shapeshifted hand at Yuka as she had her hands in the air. “You used me..?” Yuka slowly said. Roberta made a little smile. “Sorry Yukes. It may come as a surprise for an outsider species. You may not understand it either. I work for a special council of sorts for the Skolex, we do a lot of undercover work to obtain one goal, survival. We have to consume a lot of energy and these solids of yours provide with a rich amount of unusual neural energy from being a symbiotic species and being able to handle two brains inside themselves at once.” Yuka’s face darkened but she spoke up. “That’s where you were wrong, Roberta. I do understand it. Hell, I don’t even completely condemn the act of pillaging humanoids to protect your own people’s future. But my people suffer from something similar too, poverty, loss, loss of their wills, lost of purpose. I do whatever it takes to make sure they’d survive. But if you go ahead and even touch a ribcage of my solids there, I will make sure you regret it all the way to Hell.” Yuka morphed her own arm into a gun. “Go ahead, shoot me Yuka. I got what I needed. I can just simply send a homing beacon to the other Skolex’s ships here. You are out of options and you are out of tricks up your sleeve.” Roberta said. “You made one miscalculation though, Roberta.” She quickly hit the skull pin her jacket. “Big fratellos always like to stick their noses in their little sorella’s personal lives.” Roberta turned back into her normal giant worm state and lashed out at her, but it missed as Yuka’s body was becoming thin air. As Valentino was beaming Yuka’s molecules aboard one of the other Globbus ships, Roberta turned back into a humanoid and spoke again. “For whatever its worth Yuka, I did really like you, probably even loved you. I meant it those nights together too. I know you don’t believe me though. I truly hope if situations were different, we could have stayed together.” When Yuka arrived on hers, the two ships begun firing on each other rapidly back and forth. The siblings smaller ship was getting a hard beating on bigger one. Sparks flied from their monitors, nearly knocking them both out. That’s when Valentino was suddenly demorphed with his solid. Him and Yuka looked confused. “Rickbones..?” Valentino said slowly and slithered to the skeleton. “This old ass former mobster ain’t goin’ out like a coward. I’ll see chu kids on the other side. Hopefully us solids and you liquids will be able to morph again somedays.” Rickbones strapped himself some explosive device from the weapons room and took Yuka’s pen. He was beamed over to Roberta’s ship. “Rickbones PLEASE DON’T!” Valentino pleaded with the old skeleton. Yuka looked horrified, the last of her solid people gone now. Instantly Roberta’s vessel exploded, sending back the siblings ship back a few thousand miles. They regained their composure moments later and zoomed out of the system. The two kept a look at each other for what seemed to be like an eternity of of seconds, in a long silence, only the hum of the ship breaking it. Valentino had an eerie feeling all those months ago and he just couldn’t have shaken it off. Blame his overprotectiveness of his little sister all these years he thought to himself or maybe not, in this case. He had a feeling she had the same feeling about Roberta’s trip beinf too good to be true, like Yuka purposefully let Valentino follow them out there. Or maybe some kind of unconscious sibling connection. From a back mirror, Yuka watched the very distant ships of their long lost people and after shock explosion of her former girlfriend’s ship. Several decades later and years after the fall of the Edo’s borders to Amanto, a woman was applying for a journalist job. The sign said Sky News 9 and was looking for a male news anchor particularly. “Oh well, when in Rome.” Roberta shapeshifted herself and walked into the interview. She shook hands with the judges there. “Hello, the names Robert. Some call me Bobby.” Present day Yuka had reached her destination from the cab, it was some old restaurant and bar she had visited a lifetime ago. It was a pretty worn down place not exactly the hustling bustling place she once knew but it was friendly. She walked in and sat down there with a drink. Sophia’s journal entry was racing through her head as she looked down in the endless abyss caramel hue of her drink. Love? What is love to me? I think maybe it’s me being able to skip through in the villages every day with my best friend always in sight. Or maybe it’s like the feeling I get from hearing the happy loud laugh of my and Yuka’s fratello. Or possibly when I share with them something personal I wrote with them. Although I do not know yet of the other kind of love adult solids and liquids talk about, maybe one day I will understand what the big fuss is all about. I wonder if romantic love is as beautiful and soft as a melody. Some new lady was singing there at the club as there had been different countless people on that stage before. Yuka looked disinterested and paid the tab of her unfinished drink, leaving not even halfway in the performance. ———————— The detectives and gods were walking in the woods of Edo. In hopes to find the Captain. It had been three days with no luck surprisingly. They’ve covered hundreds of miles of terrain. “You would think the most powerful beings in the universe together would be able to locate one man easily!” Josh looked at a tree that had a carved picture of Ginpachi with the words RIP on it, possibly done by someone there previously in another arc. He shook his head and continued walking. Steve spoke out with more irritation than usual. “Well maybe we would have located Stephen sooner if SOME PEOPLE DIDN’T HOLD US UP!” “Dude, I never realized how wickedly chill you were. If we worked together we totally would have been able to overthrow Utsuro.” Joe laughed with the arm around the immortal. “Totally dude. Like, imagine it. Evil Joe and my bad boy self. We would have skyrocketed the polls from these other losers.” Billy was jamming his head to the beat coming from no where. “Shove those Good Boy cookies up your ass old man!” Jazzy and Steve’s faces darkened even further from their younger brothers. Josh just strolled around with the same friendly smile, intaking the views of the cartoon world around him. Even though he has gone to other planets in the book before, couldn’t believe the range of distance of terrain. He inhaled the fresh crisp air of the nature and extended his palm to see it was starting to lightly snow again. “Ridiculous.” Steve was referring to the drunkards behind them. He then drew up coats from his notebook. He handed one to Jazzy and helped his little cousin put on the other. “Maybe we should just abandon them, Steve-dono...” Jazzy said in a monotone. “Oh come on, we’re no better in our sober state helping you two then we are right now.” Joe sai as he took his mechanic arm off of Billy. “We’ve been walking for days. Our clues aren’t leading us anywhere, this Stephen guy is practically cloaked or something.” Billy was still jamming out even though the song ended but he spoke up, “Hey fishhead, couldn’t you just peer up from heaven to find the old geezer down here? You put us through enough torture.” But Jazzy shook his head. “Suave has the keys to the pearly gates right now, so there’s nothing I can then except on foot.” Jazzy replied and Billy just scoffed. “How about we skadoo out of the book and see what’s going on with all this book shifting?” Joe suggested to his sibling and he nodded in agreement. Jazzy and Billy looked at each other. The fish sweatdropped as Billy rolled his eyes. “Unfortunately.. your book is in the control of someone else right now.. you see-“ Jazzy was interrupted by Billy. “You bozos forgot to take the book to a secure place and now it’s halfway across the globe with that stupid kid with the stupid voice.” Billy crossed his arms as he kicked a rock on the forest trail. Steve and Josh looked shocked thet they forgot such a careless thing. “Us bozos?” Joe scoffed. “You were there too, man. We’re all in this boat together now.” “Can’t we skadoo out and talk to Dylan?” Steve asked the fish. “I’d advise against it, Steve-dono. Way too dangerous after the shift.” Jazzy suggested. Josh was still memorized by the landscape turning into an early winter. He still had his hand out to catch snowflakes and looked at their designs, each and every one of them unique, just like the real world. His face lit up with wonder. “Josh, you’ll catch a cold.” Steve drew him a scarf and put it around his neck. Josh turned to him and smiled, Steve smiled back and chuckled. “Sorry, I guess I am getting a bit too tense right now.” “Think nothing of it, cousin. You know Steve, everyone, maybe we’re looking at this the wrong way.” Josh had everyone’s attention on him now. “If we just had a different view then maybe this would go quicker.” A few moments later they heard the sound of a truck coming up behind them at a reasonable speed. They turned around and cleared the path. The truck stopped near them and the driver glanced at them through their tinted window, upon seeing one of them it changed its physical figure. A man energetically jumped out of car and showed them his badge. “Bobby of Sky News 9, at your service!” He beamed. “Did somebody need a ride somewhere?!” He exclaimed. Steve and the others looked surprised except Billy who crossed his arms. “Could you take us around the woods, mister? We’re trying to find a friend of ours.” Josh innocently said. Bobby’s face lit up at this. “You three must be those super famous detectives Edo and the rest of the galaxy has heard about!” He exclaimed. “Yeah and us two are gods, what’s the big deal, lady.” Billy said but Bobby did not make eye contact with him. “Sure I can take you there! My news team was traveling to get the scoop out here.” Bobby ushered the gang to come inside his truck. They entered it willingly except Billy who just stood there. “Come on Billy! We got a free ride.” Josh said. Billy rolled his eyes and sighed out annoyed before finally giving up and going inside. They sat down and buckled up across from two camera men who waved to them. Bobby got in the front seat when Billy slided into the passenger one. Puzzled Josh looked at Joe for an answer but he just shrugged. “Hey toots.” Billy smiled syly at the man. Bobby just scowled and looked the other way. He stepped on the pedal and away they went. “Supposedly the tremors experienced earlier in the city originated from somewhere far east of the woods.” Bobby smiled and looked at the rear mirror at the detectives and fish behind him. “Now then, what should I call this little venture once we get up there with the cameras? News flash! Bobby gets to the source of the earthquakes with world famous detectives and living gods!” He joked. Steve and Josh smiled. Meanwhile Billy was trying to get Jazzy’s attention in the reflection. Billy mouthed the words “popularity poll’ and subtly shrugged his shoulder at Bobby. Jazzy just shrugged. Billy made a quiet irritated noise and then mouthed another word. “R-Roberta?!” Jazzy said out loud. At this the car was met with a screeching hault midway on a hill. Bobby turned to Billy and transformed back into his preferred humanoid state. The detectives look on in pure shock. “Of course you just had to guess right away who I was, Bills.” Irritated Roberta crossed her arms. “It’s not really hard to guess when you literally have that picture up there in the corner of your window, girly.” Billy pointed to the photo in question. “Talk about clinging to a lost hope. How many decades has it been? Man, you two are always getting in some fuckin’ annoying quarrel in every ‘verse it feels like.” At these words Roberta floored the car faster up the hill and was twisting around corners at rapid speeds. “Who is this lady?!” Steve called out as he clung onto the walls behind him. “Forget that, we have to get out of here. This woman is much more dangerous than she appears!” Jazzy clapped his hands and they teleported out of the van before it could toss them overboard. They landed in some different part of the woods. Roberta haulted the car again, looked straight ahead and pointed to the camera men behind her. They tumbled out of the car and morphed back into their natural state of giant black worms and begun their search for Steve and the rest. Roberta rubbed her eyes underneath her tinted glasses and put an arm out the window. She then caught a glimpse of the picture Billy had mentioned earlier and exhaled. ———-————- “Dylan had been on his own for the last three days as the funny ugly men had stopped talking to him through the binder.” But he could see Hitsugi and Stephen resting down for the afternoon by some snowy tree, their injuries were taking more of a toll on them than they thought. Dylan rubbed his face. He hadn’t ate or drank anything in that time. And he wouldn’t dare touch his new coconut buddies whose faces the result of Dylan’s hallucinations. He picked up three tiny white sea shells he had found earlier on the island and placed them in front of Steve, Josh and Billy. “Sorry Josh old friend, but you don’t get marshmallow. The total drama tribe had spoken.” He said getting two shows mixed up. Dylan looked around before moving the shell from Billy to Josh. “But due to the shows producer, Dylan had chosen the real finalist. And it wasn’t because he didn’t like said pathetic plaid wearing man. Sorry but the total drama tribe has spoken. Pack your things, you are going home.” Dylan laid his back down on the warm sand and then sighed. “Dylan wish he could go home..” He kicked the heel of his foot in the sand and felt something sharp. “Number five, sharp pain.” Dylan sat up and picked the item out of the ground. He dusted it off and examined the glowing purple crystal, he looked at it with awe. Then suddenly the water surrounding the island faded from a bright blue to a dark purple hue. Unknown to Dylan, the entire island was the source of the purple crystals. There were many more deep within the hidden island, some extending extreme heights. The only people washing ashore there previously had been an expecting couple from a shipwreck. Dylan looked now as the island was completely engulfed in the dazzling color. He looked back at his coconut friends. “Number... one. Weird purple tropics.” TBC
  14. “Talia” - King Princess
  15. Taken moments before his gory assassination, who are we as a species to decide who gets to live and who doesn’t on the food chain? These fish act so high and mighty about being vegetarians in the series and yet pray on innocents whose conscious being has just yet evolved. Sickening. This is the thing that wipes species completely out. This poor peanut described himself as blind, evolution being the sick cruel and slow bastard that it is, didn’t provide him anything but the hope of someday in his species being able to communicate with these disgusting sealife creatures and he still gets murdered in the process i just hope thousands of years in the future that these little guys are able to evolve into a state to fend for themselves and get rights previously withheld from them because of their limited state previously. expect to see a whole civilization of human and peanut hybrids as well, once the peanuts had called off the world war between the two for a more friendly coexistence, maybe then sandy will get the idea of love and peace for marine biology.....
  16. P͖͉ra̻͎̩i̻̗͚̝͎ś̩e͕͕ ҉b̮͕̲͔̞̗̮͢ḛ͉͍ ̤͔̘͓ţ̣̯̪̮h̴͖͎̬̩͕̬͚ỳ̹ ̲n̷̜̥͉͉a͔̬͙̦͕͔m̼̤̺e̬͕̼ ̦̲̝͇͡ơ̖̜̞̝n ̞̲͡t͕h̖̫̦̲͔̕i̢s̴ ͈̠͙͖̞͘u͖̫͇̬̟ǹ͖̞̝͙h̭͖̯ol͈̲̲͙̱̗y͖̤͔̤͍ ̡̲̹̪͚̯̖ͅd͘à̰̪̟ý̦.̹̞̥̯̬̯
  17. Cha


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