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Clappy last won the day on February 6

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About Clappy

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    The One Who Annoys People With His Reviews
  • Birthday 03/26/1989

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  1. Not going to lie. Before I decided on doing 2011 back over the summer, I was contemplating jumping on 1987 but ended up not doing so due to having a hard time coming up with anything to say for a potential worst list on each song. Out of the ones you have on your worst list, I had Shake You Down, I Died In Your Arms Tonight, Lean On Me, and Next Time I Fall on mine. So glad to see all those on your worst list. Just an all around joy to read as always and I can't wait to read your best list.
  2. It's back! After a two month hiatus due to focusing primarily on my year end lists, it's time for a much needed update. I was thinking about bumping this last month, but to the surprise of no one, January is an awful rancid time for movies. I'd rather not talk about what I saw this month because there was Split...and that's it in terms of quality because everything else was a massive crapshoot so let's just pretend January never happened. Time to move forward into February. Which honestly, this month is only slightly better in terms of what to expect. But not that much better. Let's just get this month over with already because March is supremely stacked and I can't wait to rate that month so much with the likes of Logan, Kong, Beauty and the Beats, and Ghost in the Shell. Let's go @Gwen Stefani and @Rachel Bloom because you two are pretty much the only ones that I feel actually read this anymore. CLAPPY RANKS THE MOVIES OF FEBRUARY 2017 1. Get Out Jordan Peele's career is about to skyrocket because of this. You heard it here first as we already knew how great Key & Peele were together. But man, I wasn't expecting this. The trailer attached does not give you a heads up as to how out there this movie really is. Yeah you aren't wrong about this being "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" meets "The Stepford Wives"...but it's more than that because I feel it carves out it's own identity very clearly and cleverly. It's suspenseful, at times comedic, very satirical and tackles racism in America in such a strong strong way. I love this movie, expect me to talk about this much more in depth around the end of 2017 (yes I know it's too early to call it, but I honestly love it that much that it would surprise even myself if I don't include it). You know what I'm really starting to appreciate about Blumhouse Productions? They give their creators total creative control and let them run wild with it. No studio meddling (as far as I know), rarely an over the top budget, just original properties in an era where we are running the creative well dry and relying on sequels, remakes, reboots, etc. We saw how good Split is doing right now and Get Out is just getting started. A perfect 100% Rotten Tomatoes score (last time I checked), a 30 million plus opening weekend, and an A audience score (last time I checked). Get out and see this movie now people. We need to support great original content like this. 2. The LEGO Batman Movie And we go from satirizing racism in America to satirizing Batman in pop culture past and present. I've already talked about this plenty in depth in the thread for this movie so I won't really be digging that deep into the well except saying that I think the LEGO cinematic universe is already heading off to a great start. I can't wait to see LEGO Ninjago this fall and The Lego Movie 2 two years from now. This universe that Lord and Miller are building (yes @Bada Bing Nuggets, this universe that THEY are building ) is both beautifully animated and extremely funny. It may not be as great as The LEGO Movie, but it honestly doesn't need to be. It's a fun superhero movie with so many references of the past century of Batman material that it provides us DC superhero fans what fun actually is amidst how self-serious and dreary the DC Cinematic Universe currently and will be for the forseeable future. 3. John Wick Chapter 2 Can I just say that I'm glad this movie got such a huge cult following? This is what I was referring to earlier about supporting great original content so we can get more of it. The first John Wick was a great action movie and the sequel is even better. It doubles down on what made the original work so well with nonstop badass action sequences and a great story to boot. And of course, let's not forget about the star of this movie. No, not his new dog and not the mini Matrix reunion (I would say spoiler but all you need to do is look at the cast list to see that it's not), Keanu Reeves himself. Keanu has gotten plenty of flack from me in the past with the amount of shit he has been a part of. But there is no denying, never has been from me, about how good he is when he's got the right material in front of him. The John Wick movies fit literally right into Keanu's warehouse of neo-noir action movies and what I love about his portrayal in them is how believable he is in them. I mean take a look for yourself: That is commitment. I would never fuck with Keanu Reeves in real life. He's dangerous with a loaded gun. 4. Fist Fight After praising the last three movies, this is where the decline in quality drops dramatically. That's not saying this movie is bad persay. It's not. It's definitely not good either. This movie is just...there. It doesn't do anything ground breaking. It doesn't do anything memorable either. It's just lackluster. I wish it was much more though because our two leads have pretty great comedic timing and it has one of the guys behind modern It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia behind it, a legitimately funny television series. I am just incredibly disappointed in what we got, but that's just the comedy genre in a nutshell for nearly the past year. I have no idea what the hell is going on with the genre as of late, but I am longing for a great comedy again in 2017. 5. A Cure for Wellness A recurring theme in this post is my longing for great original content. Now that doesn't always transition into great movies obviously. Here is one that looked incredibly interesting from the trailers. I know I was interested and even listed it on my movies I was looking forward to in 2017. It has an actor I really like (Dane DeHaan), a talented director (Gore Verbinski), and especially original content. What did we end up with? An overlong, slightly disturbing imagery, messy story that could have been so much better than it actually was. Don't get me wrong, the imagery here is memorable but I feel like Gore Verbinski was focusing far too much on trying to shock you rather than making a coherent story. The movie focuses way too much on trying to be groundbreaking that it doesn't focus nearly enough on making a functioning movie to back up it's definitely memorable sequences. As a movie, it's mediocre, but I certainly won't be forgetting what I saw at least. 6. Rings I've been going back and forth this month as to which was worse. This or the next choice you can look at just by hitting that scroll bar. You can say that this is a tie for last, but right now, I'm saying this was barely better. But saying this is barely anything is a fucking disgrace because this movie is fucking terrible. I know The Ring movies were big in the early 2000s, but I didn't know that meant the reboot/sequel/whatever would be this dated either. I'm not just talking about rehashing plot points from past movies in this unnecessary trilogy, I mean being dated in pop culture context for a movie that allegedly takes place "thirteen years after the original". WHO THE FUCK STILL HAS A LANDLINE PHONE IN 2017!?!?! I mean shit, you can have Samara launch herself through your own smart phone now and not once do they even do that. You know what I'm getting absolutely sick of with these sorts of horror movies? Endless jump scares. Every fucking scene feels like endless jump scare after endless jump scare. The directing and acting isn't even worth mentioning, except for a wasted Vincent D'Onfrio cameo and I think that Leonard from The Big Bang Theory is in this (EDIT: Yep, that was him). Otherwise, what a fucking terrible movie. Even for the low standards I have for these sorts of horror movies, this was unbelievable amounts of bad. 7. Fifty Shades Darker Why do I subject myself to these movies? My girlfriend and I decided we were in the mood to check this out for a laugh...which I ironically did for a date when the original came out two years ago. However, unlike the original, this is not even so bad it's entertaining. This is just a "dark" "dreary" mess. I use the quotes sarcastically of course because it tries to be dark and dreary and doesn't accomplish that. It's just annoying. Everything about this movie annoys the piss out of me. The acting is awful. The writing is awful. The sex scenes are unarrousing. This movie doesn't know what the hell "sexy" even is. Just every single thing about this movie is grating and just...annoying. I can't stand this movie and while I was way too lenient on the original for making me laugh unintentionally so damn much, this is not even those levels of bad. This is just atrocious in every way imaginable. Fuck this movie. Fuck this franchise. Fuck fuck fuck fuck everything about it. ...I'm done. See you all in March.
  3. Moonlight is a great movie...but I'm never sitting through it again.  It was a chore to watch while still being a beautifully done piece of cinematic film making.  Glad that it won though because I like unpredictability.  It's entertaining.

    1. Katniss


      Why did you think it was a chore to watch?

    2. Clappy


      Because there was A LOT of talking and while I am not against talkative movies, it didn't always lead to anything.  Also that third act dragged and dragged and dragged. I still liked the movie a lot though.  I just didn't love it.

    3. Katniss


      I loved the third act tbh and how it further developed Chiron and Kevin's relationship. And I didn't mind all the talking because I liked getting to know the characters more. But agree to disagree you know :P 

  4. Get Out All of you should get out and go see it. Best movie of the year (so far).
  5. This will be Cruise #6 for me tbh. My family gets good rates due to their credit card company having a working association with the cruise line. What is that suppose to mean? Will read when I get the chance after you post it.
  6. So Jenkman. Your thoughts on my best films of 2016 list?
  7. Appreciate the feedback everyone. It means a lot. Btw for those who were curious what the rankings would have looked like if this came out on time like I was intending to last week:
  8. Say whatever happened to your Billboard blog thoughts?
  9. Definitely recommend checking it out when you get the chance. I didn't initially plan on it, but it's Scorsese so I had to see it.
  10. Besides your thoughts on Don't Wanna Know, what else did you think of my rankings? SN: Sorry for forgetting you covered 1964. I love your countdown thread, but I know I missed multiple months you covered lol.
  11. Thanks fam. Feel free to comment on the thread too because I think the heavy amount of lists on that page is starting to crash it on mobile since I just tried viewing it from my phone. That way I'm able to read your best list if you post it this weekend.
  12. It was great to see her yeah. Yeah we are going on a week long cruise to Mexico to go swim with dolphins. So it will be a good time. Both good shows....although The Big Bang Theory took a nose dive in quality around Season 6. Enjoy man.
  13. Well it's been a fun ride ladies and gents, but this is it. The final list. The coup de grace for everyone that is still following this thread all the way into February . My best films list of 2016. Honestly, this might be my favorite list of them all. Primarily because these are the best lists that stick with me the most. I may not be as good about talking about television as I am about everything else in this thread. I do love talking about music a lot and it's the one that I feel I can talk to you guys about easiest because there are a ton more music convos on this site than there are the rest. BUT...I got my start into reviewing on this site as a movie critic first and foremost and it's the format of media that I love the most. Yes it's easier to talk about bad films than it is great ones, but the great ones are the ones I rewatch the most and they are the ones that leave the longest lasting impression on me the most. That's why this part is my favorite. To share with you all what I loved the most this year. I doubt this will translate nearly as well into what I'm about to post, but take the time to seek out everything here today. Because it was time well worth it for me and hopefully it will be for you too. First, let's start with what almost made this list. The honorable mentions. I wanted to include more on those honorable mentions, but I had to trim this list down a bit because the good stuff this year was really good fam. Well let's move forward with the moment you've all been waiting for. The most prestigious film awards show in town.... CLAPPY'S TOP TEN BEST FILMS OF 2016
  14. I've started playing this again too. Not as often as I was in the summer, but what you guys said about the servers is true. I'm supremely glad they are moving faster now with less people logging on in comparison to the height of its popularity. Can't wait to catch more Johto pokes.
  15. Like nearly everyone above, it was great to see Danny Phantom again in high def, but I really wasn't all that impressed by the short otherwise. It just felt forced more than anything else. I will say this though. They are trying supremely hard to make Bunsen a big deal. Which kudos where its due whether it be Butch or Nickelodeon in general. They badly need more animated hit programs. For as mediocre as the show looks, the fact that they are pushing it this hard is something they should have done years ago with all their other Nicktoons Network castoffs. We'll see if it doesn't end up there anyway, but at least the effort is there in advertising.
Doubloons: $168,118

Ol' Reliable (GN) A *free* limited edition staff for SpongeBob's 13th anniversary. Its aura seems to weaken everyday, suggesting it will eventually lose its ability to hurt others. (Note: It's as powerful as the Basic Staff; if you have a better sword, you can get this as a collectors item.)1
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