Jjs' Riffing Theater 3000

[Metal Snake]

More cool episodes, loved the subtle reference to one of my lines in Elastic's early riff of SOF's talk show. Additional kudos for using the Nostalgia Critic's Boring Song, I actually wrote a parody of it to describe my feelings while re-reading all this copied and pasted text past! SOF "narrated".

 

Spoiler

I’m so bored...SO VERY VERY BORED!

I’d rather watch ACS’ friends hop into a plane and fly over SBC’s Fantastic Four!

It’s so DULL! There’s nothing to say!

I’d rather do an iCarly RP with NathanJR and then drive him to ballet!

WHERE DID THE FUNNY GO?!

I want my mom!

It’s possessed by an aloof demon!

This would just never pass...NOT EVEN ON TV. DOT. COM!

BORING!

The reviews are just summaries!

BORING!

It’s just not well done!

BORING!

I don’t even know what I’m reading! I’m just spoofing a song that’s really dumb!

It’s not just the summaries...

THERE’S NO FUNNY GAGS!

His lines get a little lulzy...

Then he just narrates more, as the episode JUST DRAGS!

 

BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING! BORING!

[So Sejima]

eh l might riff soon

[Jjs Goodman]

SOF's Exciting Critic Corner

1. SBC Parallel Universe

2. Eelz

3. Underwater Survivor: SBC Style

4. Robot Trout

 

5. SBCinema

 

Spoiler

[Jjs: Welcome Metal Snake and Aquatic Nuggets! This episode apparently begins the point where SECC gets REALLY bad. Is that as true as I remembered? Let's find out.]

[AN: *hops in it*]
 

SOF: Hello I’m SOF and I…don’t have any catchphrase to start with.

 

[Jjs: "I'm the Summarizing Critic, I summarize it so you don't have to read it."]

[Metal Snake: Is that a good thing or a bad thing?]

[AN: Try “It’s Crunchin’ Time”, it works for The Thing!]

 

Many users love movies such as Rocky Horror, Pirates of The Caribbean and other stuff. So the theme of this lit is movies...

 

[Jjs: Rocky Horror and Pirates of the Caribbean are still relevant?]

[Metal Snake: Really? I had a feeling it would be Rocky Horror, Pirates of the Caribbean and other stuff.]

 

the user who made this lit is a Consultant and that user is Clapmaster aka Clappy *claps*

 

[Jjs: Holy run on sentence, Batman! *claps*]

[Metal Snake: And that user is Dr. Sex PHD aka Dr. Sex *has sex*.]

 

I’m going to review SBCinema, it is a new and popular lit.

 

[Jjs:  ]

[Metal Snake: You know, you could have announced that earlier. Because you know, the title was just an extreme spoiler fail.]

[AN: I’m so glad I was alerted to this fact. I thought I was reading a summary regurgitation review of an old and unpopular spin-off! Silly me.]

 

Anyways let’s start with ep 1.

 

[Jjs: What? SOF isn't skipping an episode? What sorcery is this?]

 

SOF: *narrates* This episode is a parody of Human Centipede and I find it funny that it stars Jelly & Smiles. Basically they are being drugged...then you get this..

 

[Jjs *narrates*: So basically, here's some background info, and I find the actors funny. Moving on to more useless details...]

 

*a clip is shown where JCM was killed by Dr. Elastic*

 

[Jjs: Apparently SOF couldn't afford the rights to pasting this scene.]

[Metal Snake: So you tell us who the main characters are, and then the first “clip” you show us is of some dude we don’t know jack about from a character perspective getting murdered by Dr. Sex’s predecessor? THE CONSISTENCY, IT’S KILLING ME.]

 

SOF: Who are you? Some kind of killer named Jack?

 

[Jjs: On what world does a killer named Jack (the Ripper?) have to do with a parody of the Human Centipede?]

[AN: HEEEERRREE’S JOHNNY]

[Metal Snake: No, he’s some kind of killer like everyone who commits murder. Where’s the pun here? Elastic’s name has no relation to Jack the Ripper at all. It also has no relation to Chip Da Ripper. Hooray for jokes that don’t make any logical sense. There’s more on the way by the way, don’t worry.]

 

SOF *narrates*: Anyways, we are introduced to Shinya who I assume must be what the doctor just ordered. *laughing*

 

[Jjs: Shinya is the name of a prescription? *laughing* I guess it can help cure my headache this "review" is giving me!]

[AN:…That was actually alright. Moving on…]

[Metal Snake: Holy moly, that was fast. Again, where’s the pun? Shinya’s username doesn’t sound anything like a reference to a prescription or a type of medicine, the pun has to be in the username in order for the joke to make sense. For example...

 

“We are introduced to Steel, who I assume must be what the factory owner wants to have refined.” It sounds stupid, but it at least makes sense.]

 

Anyways, we see the doctor surgically connect with the other 3 victims.

 

[Jjs: We do? Because I'm not seeing any pasted scenes.]

 

SOF: So I guess he wanted to kill them…makes sense to me.

 

[Jjs: No SOF, he wanted to have a tea party with them. Why else would he kill JCM and surgically connect with people?]

[AN: >Surgically connects 4 people

         >”He must want to kill them!”

         Alrighty then, because that was sure explicitly stated.]

[Metal Snake: It shouldn’t make sense because it’s obvious from the story’s context that that’s not what he’s trying to do...a dead human centipede would be pretty useless to him for all this trouble he’s gone through, don’t you think?]

 

SOF *narrates*: So Dr. Elastic explained to Jelly that he had experienced with *30dog* and then he would experiment on Jelly, Smiles and Shinya.

 

[Jjs: What is a "30dog"? I looked at SBCinema and Clappy never said that...]

[AN: 30 Dog! He’s Elastic Dog, with 30 times the experience!]

[Metal Snake: *sigh* And now we have another inconsistency, because the line right after reveals him talking to the victims. Why would he be talking to the people he just killed, he’s not a shaman.]

 

Good lord, what kind of doctor is this anyway?

 

[Jjs: "Relax, I'm a doctor..."]

 

*a scene is shown where Dr. Elastic is doing surgery on Jelly, Shinya and Smiles*

 

[Metal Snake: Wait...again?! He’s doing surgery on them twice?! What, did the first surgical connection cause them massive organ failure or something?]

[Jjs: He had to do it twice because he forgot his tools for the first surgery. Either that or SOF needs to proofread before posting.]

 

SOF *narrates*: Once the operation is successful, Elastic puts a stop to Shinya, where he confessed in Japanese.

 

[Jjs: Am I the only one having a hard time understanding this recap? I honestly should just re-read SBCinema myself, it'd make more sense than this.]

[AN: Cool, so everyone knows Japanese now.]
 

Then he commits suicide…that’s a shame.

 

[Jjs: "Shinya committed suicide, ah, oh well! What a golly darn shame *laughing*" I love it.]

[Metal Snake: Got to give past SOF credit here, at least he didn’t go for some half-assed “KAMIKAZE!” joke.]

 

The detectives arrive at the crime scene to see what’s going on, but turns out Elastic drugged jjs (one of detectives with SOF).

 

[Jjs: Sense: This makes none.]

[Metal Snake: I’m curious now, what is Elastic drugging all these people with? Chloroform, sleeping pills, ritalin?]

[AN: How did Elastic drug jjs so quickly? How did the police get there so fast? Why isn’t this part making any sense? And the most important question of all: WHO IS 30 DOG?]
 

They both return to home to search any evidence from recent events while Elastic poses as SOF, and then we see jjs is dead..while Elastic gets ready to kill SOF.

 

[Jjs: Okay seriously, this makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. If Elastic was there with SOF, how could have Elastic posed as SOF? Are we sure the oh mighty Summarizing Critic read these?]

[Metal Snake: Hey Nostalgia Lorax...YOU’RE GETTING SMOKED TONIGHT!]

[AN: My brain, she is in pain.]

 

*a scene is shown where Elastic shoots SOF, then he responds by shooting back, but SOF is dead*

 

[Jjs: Thanks for the extra clarification, SOF. I couldn't tell he was dead, I mean he did get shot after all. Also, if he was shot, how could even try to shoot back? Pure lulz at its finest, only on SOF's Bland Summarizing Corner.]

[Metal Snake: R.I.P. SOF. He didn’t have good reviewing skills, and he apparently let the mad scientist get away. Seriously, what happened to Elastic after he was shot at? He’s the main antagonist, his defeat/death is an extremely important part of the story, why isn’t it summarized here?!]

[AN: So…Elastic shot SOF, then SOF responds by shooting. But he’s dead. Cool, zombies.]

 

SOF *narrates*: Jelly & Smiles were in the home as they were holding hands but Smiles dies, leaving Jelly in tears.

 

[Jjs: Well, that escalated quickly.]

[Metal Snake: Although the battle has concluded, Smiles could not survive her fatal wounds. Actually, I don’t know that from what past SOF summarized here, because it’s NOT. DESCRIBED. WHY. SHE. DIED. To quote the Nostalgia Critic, JUST. EX. PLAIN!!!!!]

[AN: I guess Smiles was getting old. …Or she died of under-explanation!]

 

SOF: As you can tell, this may be creepiest film (if anyone actually saw it) ever. I think it’s a little cliché and some kind of madman theme.

 

[Jjs: Aren't you aware it's a parody of the Human Centipede? You even said that at the beginning of this episode, silly.]

[Metal Snake: You don’t say. I never knew us watching it made it the creepiest film ever.]

 

SOF *narrates*: We’re going to go a bit faster as we see ep 2: Anchorman: The Legend of SpongeSebastian.

 

[Jjs: SOF! You didn't skip any episodes?! Shame on you!]

[Metal Snake: Slowly getting faster as we go at a reasonable pace. Seriously, what else was there to review (SUMMARIZE) in the first episode, the reason why it starred Jelly and Smiles?]

[AN: If going faster makes the summaries regurgitations very nice review go faster, then I’m all for it.]

 

It starts with Seb’s YT channel being very successful as they are being notified by their boss, jjs, that their station has maintained its long-held status as the highest-rated SpongeBob forum news program on YouTube, leading them to throw a wild party.

 

[Metal Snake: Not just the highest-rated Spongebob forum news program on Youtube, but the only Spongebob forum news program on Youtube! Woo-hoo!]

 

*scene shows jjs introducing Deli to news team*

 

[Jjs: It's too bad we don't even get to see any of these pasted scenes. Though then again, that might be for the best, considering I'd probably fall asleep from constant use of pasting scenes, and having them drag on forever.]

 

SOF *narrates*: Seb ends up asking her out under the guise of helping out a new co-worker, which she accepts. During their date, SpongeSebastian woos Deli by playing jazz flute in his friend’s club. Deli goes against her policy of not dating co-workers and sleeps with SpongeSebastian. The next day, despite agreeing with Deli to keep the relationship discreet, SpongeSebastian tells the entire news room that he and Deli are in a relationship (and later announces it on the air).

 

[Jjs: Wait a second SOF...did you plagiarize all of that from the episode? Well, someone's getting a 0 on their English Essay.]

[Metal Snake: Man, past SOF really likes to narrate giant walls of copied and pasted text. Why isn’t he summarizing the plot of this episode in his own words like with the Centipede parody episode?]

[AN: Cool, regurgitation. This is starting to feel like vomit, after all.]

 

SOF: I think that is kind of accepting in terms saying they’re just both news reporters but who cares, let them date and enjoy the joy of humanity blah blah blah….and is that best scene you got?

 

[Jjs: Never mind my statement from Episode 1, this is actually the most incoherent sentence I've ever read.]

[Metal Snake: *laughs and then slowly sobs while putting both my hands on my face* You’re not even mildly enthralled by your own (irrationally founded) opinion and then you have the gall to criticize?! Why Past SOF, why?]

[AN: I fell asleep reading that horribly written sentence long before SOF was bored with the scene.]

 

SOF *narrates*: Three months later, SpongeSebastian is unemployed, friendless, hated by the city, and is a slovenly drunk.

 

[AN: Hey, just like this lit!]

 

In this time, Deli has become very famous, but is hated by her male coworkers for sabotaging SpongeSebastian; Jjs even told OMJ, Dragiiin, and CDCB, that they are not to talk to SpongeSebastian or he will fire them if they do.

 

[Metal Snake: Oh for gosh sake.... What is with this incoherent summarizing?! If you’ve read the original episode 2 of SBCinema, you’ll know that SpongeSeb wasn’t fired because he dated Deli! It was an unfortunate series of events that led to this point, why is that not summarized here?! Sorry, but I’m going to have to do it again. JUST.....EX.....PPPPPLLLLLAAAAAIIIIINNNNN!!!!!!!]

[AN: SOF, the story stopped making sense again!]
 

When it is announced that Pinkie Pie the pony is about to give birth, all YouTube news teams head to the zoo to cover the story.

 

[Metal Snake:

 

 

Bow chick-a-wow-wow, that’s what Pinkie’s baby said. I’m sorry, I’m having my own fun at this point, I’ve just lost interest.]

 

In an attempt to sabotage her, pajoe pushes Deli into a honey badger enclosure. When Jjs cannot find Deli, he calls the bar where SpongeSebastian spends most of his time and reluctantly asks him to return. SpongeSebastian then summons the rest of his team by blowing the "News Horn", despite the fact that they were all standing a foot away playing pool.

 

[Jjs: I guess SOF ran out of lulzy jokes and nonsensical descriptions to crack out, so he's resorting to plagiarism. I am disappointed, SOF.]

[AN: I’m still waiting for this to actually become a review.]

 

SOF *narrates*: In the end, Seb & Dell were co-anchors of CNN-esque World News Center, which they look dashing…haha I get it.

 

[Jjs: Haha, I don't. And I read the show.]

[Metal Snake: I don’t get it, what’s so funny about news reporters looking “dashing”? Unless they’re planning to run a race with Rainbow Dash the pony on top of the building after work.]

[AN: That made almost as much sense as 30Dog (aka best character on the show)]

 

SOF: They are reporters of course, so what if they did take over the world?

 

[Jjs: When was it ever mentioned they would take over the world?]

[AN: WORLD DOMINATION, TELL EM WE WANT WORLD DOMINATION]

 

Audience: NO!

SOF: Point taken.

 

[Jjs: I also see SOF suddenly has an audience for his show...hopefully he didn't kidnap them too.]

[Metal Snake: ...Ask a stupid question, get an obvious answer? World news reporters don’t “take over the world”, they report what goes on in the world. They’re hired workers, not comic book super villains.]

[AN: I love how the audience is pissed off at jokes that make no sense.]

 

SOF *narrates*: Next we move onto ep 9, which is based off of The Room, but I find it it was too lulzy. To be fair, it was a hilarious parody.

 

[Jjs: I knew I could count on you to skip episodes, my man SOF! Also, here we go with the "lulzy" spam again.]

[AN: Episodes 3-8 are crying. With one donation to the “Save The Episodes” fund, you can save these poor regurgitations summaries reviews from being neglected.]

[Metal Snake: We moved onto it but we didn’t because you thought it was too lulzy?]

 

I liked how you made Drag the main character which is a good choice and best part is you included the flower scene.

 

[Jjs: Yes, because Drag made the most lulziest spin-off ever, remember?]

[Metal Snake: So you liked it, but you’re not going to review it even though you have nothing to fear?!]

[AN: The flower scene isn’t elaborated on at all. Leaves things up to the imagination….     ]

 

So I guess there isn’t that much to talk about and plus Nostalgia Critic already reviewed The Room. If you wanted to watch his review, go ahead, it’s funny and hilarious.

 

[Jjs: Looks like that is SOF's way of getting NC off his ass for copying him.]

[Metal Snake: Oh, because another guy’s review is funny and hilarious, mine is automatically going to be uninteresting and unprovoking of great interest.]

[AN: The Nostalgia Critic peed himself a little when he saw SOF recommended him.]

 

SOF: That’s it for SBCinema it was good lit from the eps I saw.

 

[Jjs: "From the eps I saw"? How much did you see from the episodes you saw? This review makes me question that.]

[AN: But you completely skipped 3-8. And they’re still crying, man. Think about the children.]
 

It has a few flaws, but I don’t think there is a such thing as a perfect Spin-off or Lit IMO.

 

[Jjs: But there is! You said Eelz was the "Most Lulziest Spin-Off Ever" and Robot Trout was the "Funniest Spin-Off Ever".]

[Metal Snake: Heh. Then at least this “critic corner” is proof you have humility.]

 

Still, it had pretty good elements and I liked how the parodies were SBC style.

 

[Jjs: If you knew they were parodies, why didn't you understand anything about them? Were you just trying to be funny? If so, I don't think it worked. The Nostalgia Critic pities you for your humor.]

[Metal Snake: Uh...it’s called “SBC”inema, what other style would the parodies be in? Gangnam Style? Sorry, sorry, I take that back. PLEASE not Gangnam Style.]

[AN: With a name like SBCinema, I expected SBM Style parodies, tbh]

 

There’s some good laughs too.

 

[Metal Snake: I thought the Redundancy of Redundancy Department would have fulfilled and completed your request by now.]

 

Clappy is still considered one of the best creators to this very day. So yeah, it was a good lit.

 

[Jjs: "In other words, kissing Clappy's ass is the only way to make a quick buck around here."]

[Metal Snake: Maybe because they’re tired of taking your requests.]

 

*episode ends*

 

[AN:  ]

 

_________________________

 

Commercial:

 

[AN: DAMMIT THERE’S MORE]

[Jjs: Oh, a commercial? Is it for a Nostalgia Critic review?]

 

Hey it’s March, you know that means

*pause for 5 seconds*

 

[Jjs: It's March already? Man, time flies!]

 

SOF: TV’s Terribly Terrible Sunday!

 

[Jjs: Hm, why does this remind me of Nostalgia Critic's Disneycember?]

[Metal Snake: I’m not the most ardent viewer of TV, but I have a very good feeling television programs do not typically like to advertise themselves as terrible.]

 

*static*

WhoaWhoa: Hello there

 

[Jjs: Now he kidnapped WoahWoah too? How SOF hasn't been arrested yet is a mystery.]

[AN: Whoa, whoa. This is crazy. Woahwoah AND an audience are trapped in SOF’s basement?]

 

SOF: Oh WhoaWhoa, I’ve been expecting you..

 

[Jjs: My point still stands.]

[Metal Snake: Ah, Mr. Bond. I’ve been expecting you.]

 

WhoaWhoa: How dare you steal my idea!

 

[Jjs: What, did WoahWoah want to be a Summarizing Critic as well?]

[AN: *WoahWoah calls the cops*]

 

SOF: Well to be honest, I started the idea back in November, but due to SECC going on hiatus, I pushed it to February and now March...so yeah, you don’t mind do you?

 

[Metal Snake: I put it on hiatus because I put on hiatus. I am starting to get sick all of these redundant statements...]

[Jjs: Time to call the Redundancy Department. Redundancy of Redundancy Department would like to have a word with you SOF in that house which is a house on the street on this block, in this town.]

 

WhoaWhoa: I DON’T CARE! YOU HAVEN’T ASKED WHAT ME WHAT TO DO!

 

[Jjs: SOF didn't ask you anything. He didn't even ask you to be on this show, he just kidnapped you.]

[Metal Snake: What me what? What’s next, who he who she who?]

[AN: *WoahWoah commits murder*]

 

SOF: Actually Steel can since he revealed he’ll do it in the end of the month, so yeah. If you keep complaining, I’ll tell Steel to come to your house and kick your ass. Got it?

 

[Jjs: Steel: SOF's Legal Guardian.]

[Metal Snake: So Steel is an assistant and a paid thug in past SOF’s imagination? Wow.]

[AN: Now Steel can sound like SOF too! Steel: I’ll kick your ass, _____!]
 

WhoaWhoa: Fine! *leaves*

SOF: Sheesh, WhoaWhoa sure is a bad reviewer, isn’t he?

 

[Jjs: IRONY POLICE, CLEAN UP ON AISLE 5!]

[AN: So that’s why Steel’s here- To generate IRON-y. ahahahahah]
 

*cue scene from P&F*

Phineas: Yes, yes he is.

 

[Jjs: Oh great, he's kidnapping more cartoon characters?]

[Metal Snake: Wow, past SOF is reminding me of an arrogant rapper. He needs to put other people down to build himself up.]

[AN: Phineas: Ferb, I know what we’re gonna do today!

Ferb: Get trapped in SOF’s basement?

Phineas: Exactly!]

 

SOF: Thank you folks, stay tuned for the world premiere of Tvguy's Terribly Terrible Sunday on March 25th with 4 BRAND NEW EPISODES!

 

[Jjs: Oh boy, the infamous quadrilogy. Can't wait to riff those. Thanks again, AN and MS!]

[Metal Snake: Yes, four brand new episodes of what I wish was fun! Well thanks for letting me co-riff jjs, I hope you and the others have fun with the infamous Tvguy block! After that, I get to help riff your least favorite review (SUMMARY) of all...heh heh...]

[AN: Have no lots of fun with the TTTS block, and thanks for letting me riff again jjs! Every time I do my soul is destroyed a little bit more.]

 

[Metal Snake]

Good job to both you and AN! Reading this episode again, I realize that it's only slightly worse than the first four. XP

[Jjs Goodman]

SOF's Exciting Critic Corner

1. SBC Parallel Universe

2. Eelz

3. Underwater Survivor: SBC Style

4. Robot Trout

5. SBCinema

 

6. Spin-Off Action: Reboot

Spoiler

[Jjs: Hello, CD, Clappy, and Hayden! Ready to tackle on the start of these four controversial episodes, or as SOF dubs them, "TV's Terribly Terrible Sunday"?]

[Hayden: Yuppers, even though it's a terrible way to spend my Monday.]

[Clappy: Ah yes, back when SOF bashed Dylan's work instead of worship the ground he walks on like now. Thanks for having me again jjs.  Let's see how bad this shit gets.]

SOF: Hey guys, and now, the moment you have been waiting for. 

 

[CDCB: For this show to have unbiased opinions and actually review stuff fairly?]

[Clappy: What is this? His new catchphrase? Hopefully he remembers it, so we don't have to.]

[Jjs: Do you mean, the moment to reveal the Krabby Patty formula?

 

 

]

 

Yep, this is TV’s Terribly Terrible Sunday. 

 

[Jjs: Fuuuu-]

[Hayden: Sounds terrific.]

[CDCB: Oh goody!]

[Clappy: The name of this "program block" is terribly terrible.]

 

There was a lot of shows I wanted to review, but there is one user who has made so many Spin-Offs and Lits, some of them just hit a case of the meh. 

 

[Jjs: "Hit a case of the meh"? What is this new disease?]

[CDCB: M.E.H. - Mediocre Entertainment Hormones]

[Hayden: Is it contagious? Life threatening? WE NEED TO KNOW SOF!]

[Clappy: No jjs, meh is what people said when SOF asked if doing this was a good idea.]

 

Who is this user? 

 

[Jjs: I wonder, because the whole tagline of "TV's Terribly Terrible Sunday" definitely doesn't tell us. Who could it be indeed?]

[Hayden: SOF sure enjoys insulting our intelligence, of course the user is Dragiiin123.]

[CDCB: It's me! I'm the user! ]

[Clappy: I bet it's 4EverGreen. *insert a bunch of irrelevant smilies here*]

 

It is...tvguy347. 

 

[Jjs: Mind=blown.]

[CDCB: ...never mind.]

[Clappy: For a minute I thought we were stuck on SOF's "talk show", not his Nostalgia Critic carbon copy.]

[Hayden: Dangit, I thought it'd totally be Dragiiin.]

 

I know what you are thinking, what’s wrong with him?

 

[Clappy: More like what's wrong with you.]

[Jjs: He burned our crops, poisoned our water supply, and brought a plague down upon our houses!]

[CDCB: Kill the lifeguard!]

 

Well, he made about one million SOs and Lits.

 

[Jjs: ONE MILLION!? Either SOF is exaggerating or he has a lot of time on his hands to count that many. I wonder if he'll review all one million?]

[Hayden: Given SOF's track record I'm sure he'll go into detail on each and every episode of these one million shows.]

[Clappy: Dylan may write a lot of one and done spin-offs, but a million? Now you're just bluffing.]

 

It feels like most of them are mystery/drama series. 

 

[Jjs: It feels like most of this review is useless background information so far.]

[Clappy: It feels like this series is useless background information so far.]

[CDCB: It feels like there's something squishy under m--hey, who put this soufle in my chair?]

[Hayden: I like those genres, now get to actually bashing tvguy. *throws tomato*]

 

Not to mention they take hiatuses/delays…a lot. 

 

[Jjs: Okay, and this helps your review because...]

[CDCB: Not to mention your reviews are very biased...a lot.]

[Clappy: This is what I like to call 70s-ing. Which is when you just write for the length.]

[Hayden: It's almost like tvguy has a life outside of writing them.]

 

There’s a tons of mistakes he made in them. 

 

[Jjs: IRONY POLICE, CLEAN UP ON AISLE 5!]

[Hayden: "There's a tons" You don't say SOF....]

[Clappy: Replace SpongeBob with how ironic this lit is.

 

 

]

 

I didn’t find them quite interesting to read,

 

[Clappy: Funny. I'm not finding this lit to be any more interesting.]

 

and some of them...well, had complex plots at best.

 

[CDCB: "Complex plots at best." What, complexity doesn't impress you?]

[Jjs: Isn't complex a good thing sometimes?]

[Hayden: SOF likes his plots short and simple. "The dog ran away. The owner found him. They lived happily ever after." That would be A+ material in SOF's eyes.]

 

Some of the stories are confusing and are hard to follow. 

 

[Hayden: Well if SOF couldn't understand it, I'm sure no one will be able to.]

[Jjs: *calls Irony Police again*]

[CDCB: Wee woo wee woo wee woo!]

[Clappy: 

 

&feature=player_embedded

 

]

 

Like Lost for example, I enjoyed watching the show for a while and Glee is another good example.

 

[Jjs: How are Lost and Glee even related to any of his shows?]

[CDCB: That reminds me of the time I made a waffle and added extra strawberries for deliciousness.]

[Hayden: SOF watched Lost? How about that ending, eh?]

[Clappy: I call bullshit on SOF actually watching Lost or Glee.]

 

Are his shows confusing? Let’s find out. 

 

[Jjs: But you just told us they were confusing and hard to follow. The Redundancy Department is really going up SOF's ass if this keeps up.]

[Clappy: And here I thought his "compliments" up this point weren't the only things going up SOF's ass.]

[Hayden: I like how SOF is adding a bit of mystery to the review to keep us intrigued.]

 

Again, these are just my honest opinions.

 

[Hayden: As opposed to your dishonest opinions?]

[Clappy: That's funny because your opinions have just been compliments on all these other episodes.]

[Jjs: Whatever you say, Spin-Off Lorax.]

[CDCB: Oooh! Is there a Spin-Off Onceler too?]

 

First of all, let’s talk about Spin-Off Action…the Reboot that is. 

 

[Jjs: No way, I wouldn't have guessed from the title. Mind=blown again.]

[Clappy: I can't believe I'm up to Page 3 on Microsoft Word and this is finally the start of the fucking review.]

 

Yes, I know it’s like TDI all over again. 

 

[Jjs: Oh goody, will you skip so many episodes like with Underwater Survivor? You should be named the Skipping Episode Bland Summarizing Critic at this point.]

[Clappy: Heh, that's funny. You didn't call the original Spin-off Action TDI. You didn't call Underwater Survivor that. SOF bias at his finest.]

[CDCB: Enough background info! Get on with the show already...]

[Hayden: Well, if it's like TDI I'm already hooked.]

 

Original creator of the spin-off is Clappy, who wrote the original first 5 seasons. 

 

[Jjs: *zzzz* Useless background details..making me sleepy. Review is going nowhere. Might fall asl-*zzzz*]

[Clappy: Seriously, have a point already.]

[CDCB: You just don't listen, do you?]

 

Now tvguy bought the rights of his spin-off, for a 6th season - and a reboot version. 

 

[Jjs: Redundancy of Redundancy Department would like to have a word with you SOF in that house which is a house on the street on this block, in this town.]

[Clappy: For fuck's sake SOF, we know what happened. This isn't an episode of your failed talk show either. This is a review. Actually get to the material.]

 

But was it reboot everyone wanted? 

 

[Jjs: To quote another Wumbology riff: "Look, Jane. Tarzan write spin-off."]

[CDCB: Was it useless background info everyone wanted?]

 

Let’s found out..

 

[Jjs: Let's not, mmkay?]

[CDCB: I'll pass.]

[Clappy: Nostalgia Critic-ism 234]

[Hayden: "Let's found out" I guess we already did, alright that's a wrap everyone, we can leave now.]

SOF *narrates*: We are introduced by Perch Perckins as he is the host for SOA: Reboot.

 

[Jjs: GOD DAMMIT.]

[CDCB: Son of a...]

[Hayden *narrates*: Even though Perch Perkins is a newscaster, he is a hosting a reality game show.]

*cue scene featuring Perch introducing himself*

 

[Jjs: Oh yay, looks like SOF bashing tvguy means he got the rights to pasting scenes again!]

[Hayden: Why do we need to see the scene?]

[Clappy: HEH YOU SURE SHOWED HIM SOF. POINTING OUT WHOSE HOSTING THE SHOW.]

 

"GREAT!" He grinned and took it all in. "LET'S INTRODUCE OUR CONTESTANTS! We have THREE tribes this season! First tribe... the FISH HOOKERS!"

SOF *screams*: UGH STOP YELLING!

 

[Jjs *screams*: SOF, IS THIS YELLING GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?!]

[Hayden: WOW SOF, YOU HAVE PRETTY SENSITIVE EARS IF LARGE TEXT HURTS THEM.]

[Clappy: Looks like we finally get to the first critique. Because yelling is hazardous to your health. Hence why SOF had to point out how yelling is a bad thing.]

*cue scene*

"Ladies and gents, give it up for the Fish Hookers!" A roar of applaud exploded into the Fishiac Theater in Coralwood.

SOF: Spot the reference! Whoever gets it gets a SOF cookie.

 

[Jjs: Ooh, a SOF cookie? I want one! Too bad I fail to see what reference you are going on about.]

[Clappy: I SPOT A NOSTALGIA CRITIC REFERENCE.]

[Hayden: I've got a better way to decide who gets that SOF flavored treat. *kicks Kan in the groin and runs off with it*]

[CDCB:

 

 

]

SOF *narrates*: We get to see the characters from different Spin-Off/Lits and how they have been doing so far…then we see this..

 

[Jjs *narrates*: More plot and details, and check this out...something important may happen...I think!]

[Clappy: I bet "this" turns out to be another bad joke at Dylan's expense.]

*cue scene*

"God, Sebastion smells like shit. AND I HAVE TO SLEEP WITH HIM!" Naomi sneered in the camera.

 

[Jjs: Now this is troubling. A bitch character from Bikini Top is in a TDI-esque show that is being reviewed by a Bland Summarizing Critic? My head needs to rest a bit.]

[Hayden: It's bad enough I had to riff this drug addict in Bikini Top, now she pops up in SOF's "review"?]

[Clappy: Unfortunately I can't defend Sebastion because he isn't the only thing that smells like shit.]

SOF: Why is this suddenly some adult show? Spin-Off Action was always light-hearted. Is this some attempt to parody South Park, TDI style?

 

[Jjs: I could ask the same thing about this show. Is this some shoddy attempt at the Nostalgia Critic? If so, you got the ingredients right:

 

1) Take out all emotion.

2) Add unfunny jokes.

3) Summarize constantly with no actual reviewing.

4) Add redundant statements and have clips drag on forever.

 

Wa la, that's a recipe to making a shoddy attempt at the Nostalgia Critic.]

[CDCB: Nifty. I'll steal it.]

[Clappy: South Park TDI Style would be a more interesting show than this reboot, this rip-off of the Nostalgia Critic, oh and Bikini Top.]

[Hayden: Ripping on a shoddy parody in your own shoddy parody inspired Lit is a tad hypocritical. And so what if it's not light hearted anymore, IT'S CALLED REBOOT FOR A REASON.]

SOF *narrates*: Anyways, the guys were in Floor 19, as they were discussing about voting someone off.

 

[CDCB: Umm... floor 19 of what? Wayside School?]

[Clappy: But there is no 19th floor in Wayside School.]

[Jjs *narrates*: What guys? The Backstreet Boys? The Monkeys? The Beatles? Fall Out Boy? As the Nostalgia Critic would say once again, "JUST. EX. PLAIN!!"]

[Hayden: He could of shown us a scene introducing every contestant so we know who the hell he might be talking about.]

 

I think it’s bit wrong to vote someone off when the show just started. 

 

[Jjs: But...that's the point of reality/survival game shows like TDI.]

[Hayden: Shhh jjs, he'll know when he's older.]

[Clappy: I'm starting to wonder if SOF even watches TDI.]

 

The three Tribes do the first challenge. 

 

[Jjs: What was the first challenge? Don't make me pull out the explain gag again...]

[Hayden: Was it to spot the reference?]

[Clappy: Hey Recap Critic, can you recap exactly what the 1st challenge was? I mean you are recapping a whole lot of unnecessary information. This is where you should exactly recap.]

 

After 1st challenge, we get into this scene where Mindy’s bra comes off unexecpectly...WTF?

 

[Jjs: That'd be more interesting to look at than this bland summary.]

[CDCB: Eww, mermaid porn.]

[Hayden: The one scene he doesn't show us, unbelievable. Also, "unexecpectly" is the best typo ever.]

[Clappy: Don't you mean Heather?]

http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120613212628/totaldrama/es/images/e/e6/Xtreme_tortoure_(3).jpg

*cue scene from ep 1*

SOF *narrates*: I guess they have to vote now? That was short.

 

[Jjs: This "review" is short, and I still want to know what the first challenge was, dammit.]

[CDCB: And nobody ever explained why Wayside School suddenly has a 19th floor.]

[Clappy: Since it's the reboot, probably something to do with Naomi's boobs or whatever else Elastic mentioned in his parody of this series.]

*cue scene*

 

[Jjs: I thought it already cued scene? SOF, I think your player is broke.]

[Clappy: My comments are also a broken record. I think this series finally turned into one too.]

"I'm excited!" Zed said. "I know I have a target on my back today for losing the challenge, but I have numbers. Gakuto and Skodwarde joined Rusty and I's alliance, and then we asked Sebastion to join as well so I have FIVE people in my alliance!"

SOF *narrates*: Why five? Isn’t an alliance supposed to be at least 2-3 people? I don’t get it. Let’s see who gets voted off.

 

[Jjs: Erm...no, you're wrong again. Alliances aren't always two or three people, they can be big. As bad as this spin-off is, at least try to sensibly pick it apart, don't try to nitpick things when you have no clue what you are going on about.]

[CDCB: I thought five was at least two or three people.]

[Hayden: It's almost like alliances are made to gain a majority or something...seriously SOF how does your brain work, are you this sheltered? Try watching Big Brother Canada.]

[Clappy: Of course you don't get it. Now I'm going to say you've probably never watched a reality show before as well.]

*cue scene*

"And now for the votes!" Perch Perkins said. "First vote... Spongdod, who's not even on this tribe, so it doesn't count."

Zed giggled.

SOF: Why is Spongdod even in this show? He’s not from a real show..

 

[Jjs: He's about as real as Bigfoot.]

[Clappy: Correction. Elastic and I made a parody spin-off of Spongdod in Lolland. It was only two episodes, but it was still a masterpiece.]

[Hayden: Last time I checked none of these characters are from real shows....]

*cue scene*

Third vote... Sebastion. Fourth vote... Naomi. Fifth vote... Sebastion. Sixth vote... Sebastion. Seventh vote... Naomi. Eighth vote... Sebastion. First person voted off of SOA Season 6 is Sebastion. See ya later, fuckface!"

 

[Jjs: Fuckface, just as edgy as "Let's move onto the fucking review". I said fuck, I'm edgy!]

[Clappy: Is it bad that I actually chuckled at "see ya later fuckface"? I mean yeah it's a bad line, but it was so bad that I laughed.]

[Hayden: Woohoo, Naomi's leaving! Oh wait, he was referring to Sebastion?]

 

"Bye...," Sebastion said, crying. He ran out of the arena, bawling.

"What a pussy," Rusty said.

 

[Jjs: What's new, pussycat?]

[Clappy: SOF defends Sebastion being name called in 3, 2....]

SOF *narrates*: So basically, this whole 1st ep of this reboot is basically...an adult show. 

 

[Clappy: An adult party cartoon.]

[CDCB: It's the Spin-Off Action Adult Party Cartoon!]

[Jjs: http://thetomface.files.wordpress.com/2011/12/what-a-tweest.jpg ]

 

Like I said, the original was never this dirty...what happened?!

 

[Jjs: You tell us, Summarizing Critic.]

[CDCB: SpikeTV wanted a more extreme version of Spin-Off Action.]

[Clappy: What happened? You just recapped what happened pages ago about Dylan buying my old spin-off.]

[Hayden: A user decided to put a different take on it not aimed at a preschool level. AKA SOF's level.]

 

SOF *narrates*: We cut to Mindy, Frank and Pablo who were chatting about an alliance and Frank wanted to vote Ginger out but Mindy and Pablo denied it. 

 

[Jjs *narrates*: More filler for this "review".]

[Clappy: This also just in. I lost interest after the first recap which felt like eons ago.]

 

Ava and Mango were wondering who they wanted to vote off next but Ava found Mango annoying..doesn’t have to be too aggressive. 

 

[Jjs: What? How does Ava finding Mango annoying make her too aggressive?]

[Clappy: Maybe Mango tried coming on to Ava? Wouldn't surprise with the "twists and turns" this spin-off took.]

 

Now let’s watch this scene.

 

[Jjs: Let's not.]

*cue scene*

 

[Jjs: D'oh!]

[CDCB: Homer! ]

"I don't need an alliance. I'm my own alliance. Check dat, bitches!" Ginger smiles. "I swear, I wish I was black. That Jesus guy seriously got some shit goan on!" She snaps her fingers.’

 

[Clappy: Wait. This has nothing to do with Ava and Mango? I thought we were watching that scene? I feel cheated of some possible spin-off "action".]

SOF: Wait what? It doesn’t makes sense, how did a Black Jesus give powers to you? That’s kind of a MA theme.

 

[Jjs: "A Black Jesus"? Cool, so there's more than one Black Jesus.]

[Hayden: For once SOF has a legitimate reason to be confused with a scene. Black Jesus loves little kids though SOF.]

[Clappy: Black Jesus doesn't need to explain his methods. After all, he is the chosen one. He is....Black Jesus.

 

http://www.images99.com/i99/03/85115/85115.JPG ]

 

*cue scene*

OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! HOLY CRAP! OH NO!" They all screamed in terror.

 

[Clappy: Are the contestants reading this spin-off and this "critique" of this spin-off too?]

 

Frank's head exploded suddenly, and they were showered with blood.

"JESUS, I'M HAVING MY GODDAMN PERIOD!" screamed Mindy.

 

[Clappy: Don't you mean...Black Jesus?]

[CDCB: Next thing you know, Patrick's gonna impregnate her.]

 

They were showered with more blood.

SOF: Oh wow….that’s nearly over the top. Ugh...no just no..

 

[Jjs: "Nearly"? I'm afraid to ask what SOF finds over the top then..]

[Clappy: Over the top would be the cancellation of Phineas and Ferb.]

[Hayden: I'll take fart jokes from Owen over this "humor" any day.]

SOF *narrates*: So we cut to today’s challenge…sorta..

 

[Jjs: Are we actually going to find out what the challenge is, or will you be vaguely describing it again?]

*cue scene*

"OKAY!" Perch announces. "Because of the incident with Mindy's boobs yesterday, our challenge today will be WHO CAN STARE AT WINDY'S BOO--"

 

[Clappy: And here I thought it would be Naomi...eh I was close.]

"Mindy!"

"WHO CAN STARE AT MINDY'S BOOBS THE LONGEST WINS!"

 

[Hayden: Now that's the kind of challenge I could win.]

[Jjs: That sounds like a better pass time then this bland summarizing corner.]

[CDCB: Please, no more fish por--]

So Mindy got undressed and they all had to stare.

 

[CDCB: MY EYES!]

 

Frank, Pablo, Bruce, and Mindy herself all began to cry.

 

[Clappy: Once again, it's probably because of what they are reading.]

"OKAY, THEY ARE OUT!"

 

[Clappy: NOW I AM UP]

SOF: What the hell? What kind of challenge is this?! Even RRR isn’t this dirty!

 

[Jjs: What the hell are you smoking? RRR was definitely more dirty than this, just maybe not as bloody. It had Rusty and gang constantly raping/killing users for 100 episodes, and you're telling me it isn't that dirty? I'm not trying to defend for SOA:TR, but your logic is seriously flawed.]

[Clappy: *points towards "Penias and FerbLover" as an example of dirty RRR*]

[CDCB: He's probably sniffing glue.]

SOF *narrates*: If you wanna do that, fine.. but your grammar is a mess…I don’t understand what I’m reading at all. Moving on.

 

[CDCB: Alert the archives. We have a winner.]

[Jjs: The irony...it hurts so fucking much. It hurts so bad the Irony Police just arrested SOF.]

[Hayden: I've never been in this much pain.]

[Clappy: Heh, SOF giving grammar critiques makes my head hurt.]

SOF: Well..that’s it. Thank god the show got cancelled, because this is truly the worst show I’ve ever seen on SBC.

 

[Jjs: See, it's funny, because that's what most people think of this Bland Summarizing Corner.]

[Clappy: The pot calling the kettle black at it's finest.]

[CDCB: As Mr. Krabs once said, this irony stuff is pretty good.]

SOF *narrates*: This is just absolutely atrocious. 

 

[Clappy: Once again, the pot calling the kettle black.]

[Jjs: "As the Spin-Off Lorax, I dub this the most atrocious work ever! Shame on you, tvguy!"]

[CDCB: As the Spin-Off Onceler, I choose Hayden to plant the last remaining seed of inspiration. When this seed sprouts, buckets of inspiration explode out of it and bring brilliance to all the creative media on the planet! It is the last hope for this Critic Corner. Help us, Hayden. You are our only hope.]

 

The characters weren’t in character, he chose VERY odd characters to be in the show (Rusty is from a LIT!), and it was way too inappropriate. 

 

[Jjs: "To sum it up, here's more vague reasons I hate it. There's your review, now pay me."]

[CDCB: ...no.]

[Clappy: Vintage Nostalgia Critic recap as to why this is horrendous.]

 

Sigh, it’s a shame Clappy’s golden work got ruined like this. 

 

[Jjs: Yes, because two episodes automatically ruin the Spin-Off Action series forever.]

[Hayden: The other 5 seasons are now completely tarnished.]

[Clappy: Believe it or not, I wouldn't say this show ruined SOA. Even though everyone overreacted to how bad this was, I wasn't too annoyed. This was bad, but not as bad as everyone thought. Plus it provided us a hilarious episode by Elastic.]

 

That’s all folks. More TTT Sunday on your way!

 

[Jjs: Oh god, can't wait to see what illogical flaws await in them. This was pretty painful. While I am not denying SOA: TR was a bad spin-off (no offense tvguy), SOF's reasons for hating it made no sense whatsoever, and he tried way too hard to nitpick it, resulting in it ultimately backfiring on him. Thank you for your aid, Clapster, Hayster and CD.]

[Hayden: The Hayster agrees. SOF's trying way too hard but he can't deliver because he has no semblance of common sense. Let's hope he does better with the next 3, but considering he wrote them all on the same day I severely doubt it.]

[CDCB: You're welcome, jjs! As this was my first glimpse of SOA: TR I can't really say whether it was a good show or not--I haven't even seen the original. But I can agree that SOF's riffs were all empty without any real purpose and the scenes that he quoted were very minimal and left too many questions unanswered. If Wayside School has a 19th floor now, does Miss Zarves exist too? Anyway, looking forward to the nex--actually I'm not. But anyway, until then, this is CDCB over and out!]

[Clappy: This was painfully boring. Recap this, recap that. I wouldn't mind seeing this redone since SOF loves Dylan to death now. I bet SOF hands out compliments galore. Especially to the Black Jesus character. Can't get enough of Black Jesus. Seriously, this wasn't good. And of course I mean both the reboot and the review. Looking forward to doing this again jjs. Thanks for having me.]

 

*episode ends*

 

[Hayden: Oh thanks I thought the episode was still going on.]

 

 

[So Sejima]

doesn't wayside have 20 floors?  its either me or because l woke up 45 minutes ago.

[dragiiin123]

i love hayden

 

btw the sof review show isnt really like nostalgic critic at all i mean like ya there both "critic" things but like it's not really at all

[Metal Snake]

Yeah, Spin-off Action: The Reboot is indeed bad, but looking back on it...it kinda is the "you can have a good laugh at it" kind of bad. Good riffing you guys. I hope you enjoy the next three episodes, since the first episode of the Tvguy block is said to be the least flawed of the four.

[Ron]

god that was fucking hilarious. i dont even want to give hayden a compliment, but he did the best job in that ep. clappy was super good too. actually all of the writers were great, you all fit in really well together. 

 

also, CD, you sniff glue... not smoke it lol

[CDCB]

also, CD, you sniff glue... not smoke it lol

 

Then I've been doing it wrong all these years...

[Ron]

where the hell is a new episode it's been almost a week D:

[ClassicNickelodeon Fan 1]

where the hell is a new episode it's been almost a week D:

Should be a new one coming soon.

[Ron]

Should be a new one coming soon.

 

how soon is soon D:

[SpongeOddFan]

where the hell is a new episode it's been almost a week D:

^I agree.

[ClassicNickelodeon Fan 1]

how soon is soon D:

Soon as in whenever Hayden writes his riffs for the next episode...

[Ron]

Soon as in whenever Hayden writes his riffs for the next episode...

 

just fire him and post the episode ;D

[Jjs Goodman]

Well Hayden decided not to do it, so your wish is my command, Dylan.

 

SOF's Exciting Critic Corner

 

1. SBC Parallel Universe

2. Eelz

3. Underwater Survivor: SBC Style

4. Robot Trout

5. SBCinema

6. Spin-Off Action: Reboot

 

7. SBC Therapy

Spoiler

[Jjs: Welcome, agents ClassicNickelodeonFan1 and CDCB. Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to take down the harshest review of TV's Terribly Terrible Sunday, as it is apparently called. You may not make it out alive, so choose wisely...]

[CDCB: “That’s gonna leave a mark.”]

[CNF: I'm going in. GET TO THE CHOPPAH!]
 

SOF: Hello everyone, and welcome as we continue on our TV’s Terribly Terrible Sunday!

 

[CDCB: My TV has a terribly terrible Sunday now? Great, it’s spreading.]

[Jjs: Goodie, just what I have been waiting for.]

[CNF: I'm so excited...dear lord shoot me now!]

 

Today we’re going to review something unbelievably messed-up or as I’d like to call it, the Dr. Phil parody show.

 

[Jjs: Just like how I'd call this show the Nostalgia Critic parody show...if it did it right.]

[CNF: I'd take Dr. Phil over this any day.]

[CDCB: I’d take Barney over this.]

 

That’s right, it’s SBC Therapy.

 

[Jjs: These reveals are questioning my intelligence. It's like SOF thinks we don't know the episode title doesn't exist.]

[CNF: duh im stupid.]

[CDCB: I’m going to need therapy after reading these.]

 

I have no idea how this show developed....and the SBC members are portrayed like morons in it.

 

[Jjs: "I have no idea how this show developed"? Hmm, maybe tvguy just came up with an idea? And portrayed as morons? Funny, since this lit has done the same thing with its pointless cameos of members like Ex and Steel, but go on, I'm curious to see how they are portrayed.]

 

Let’s see how bad it can be..

 

[Jjs: To go along with the whole Spin-Off Lorax joke (funny, this actually represents my thoughts on this episode too)...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOAETOdo2c0

]

[CDCB: I’m sure you’re living what comes naturally.]

 

SOF *narrates*: We start off with a doctor named Dr. Fishkins and his secretary named Barbara. He wanted to help the SBCers get along.

 

[Jjs *narrates*: I'll bash tvguy later, let's start off with some boring side details.]

[CNF: If you don't mind riffers, I'm going to take a nap *falls asleep due to lack of enthusiasm*]

*cue scene*

 

[CNF: zzzzzzzzzzzzz.]

[CDCB: I think I’ll join you, CNF…zzzzzzzzzzz…]

 

"Okay, so what is your problem," Dr. Fishkins said. "I mean... er... problems."

 

[Jjs: I've got 99 problems, but MSTing this show ain't one.]

[CNF: zzzzI'vegotproblemszzzzzzzz]
 

"Well, we run a forum down with Deli and---"

"Oh, you a forum outside a deli? Good to know." Fishkins jotted something down.

 

[CDCB: Wacky Delly, yeah!] 

[Jjs: It was the only place where they could advertise, SOF wouldn't allow them outside his studio.]
 

"No, we run a forum WITH Deli," Ex continued.

"I'm Deli!"

"Oh... Deli is your... real name?"

 

[CDCB:

Deli: Something funny about my name?

Billy: Yeah, Deli’s a girl’s name!

Deli: I was named after my father, who was named after his father, and they both fought in wars!

Billy: Okay, all I’m saying is I’ve dated 5 Deli’s…all girls.

Deli: Okay, uh, you know, I’ll tell you what: you can rot in a sack for all I care.]

[Jjs: No, it's Eddie Stilson.]

[CNF:zzzzimPeterGriffinzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz]
 

SOF: We may never know.

 

[Jjs: "Mr. Owl, how many licks does it take for SOF to actually fairly review something? The world may never know."]

[CNF: OH MY GOD I JUST A HORRIBLE DREAM WHERE SOF WAS PASTING SCENES AGAIN AND NOT REVIEWING SHIT...oh wait that actually happened dammit.]

*cue scene*

 

[CDCB: *cue intensifying boredom*]

[CNF: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART, SOF!]

"Hey, hey, that's not necessary! Don't do that, or I'll delete your posts!" 70s said, and got up to face the doctor.

 

[Jjs: 70S VS. THE DOCTOR, RIGHT HERE ON SECC WRESTLING!]

[CNF: I smell a Community Deathmatch.     ]

"What're you talking about?"

"Come on guys, let's just get along!" exclaimed Jelly.

 

[Jjs: Said no one ever on this forum.]

[CNF: No one ever gets along here partner.]

[CDCB: Howdy y’all! Git along little doggies! ....what?]

"I'm jjs," said jjs.

 

[Jjs: No, this is Patrick.]

[CNF: And I'm the gingerbread man.]

[CDCB: *eats*]

"Is this SBM?" SOF asks.

 

[Jjs: NO, THIS IS PATRICK!]

SOF: Why the sudden stupidity?

 

[CDCB: Sudden? It’s been going on ever since you tried impersonating Nostalgia Critic.]

[Jjs: "Sudden stupidity"? I'm not sure what you are reviewing pal, but we aren't even halfway into the review.]

[CNF: You just said that cause of what you said.      ]

 

I mean, the characters weren't acting like their age and like Patrick fucking Star instead! 

 

[Jjs: Who is Patrick Fucking Star? Is he Patrick's sex obsessed brother?]

[CNF: I had a threesome with him once. Yeah...wasn't the best thing I've done.]

[CDCB: I hear he also made a porno with Squidward Testicles and SpongeBoob.]

 

Plus, he’s making a mockery of me and many others.

 

[Jjs: RRR always made a mockery of everyone, yet you never complained. Bias? Also, time to revive an old gag...

]

[CNF: OH BOO HOO IT'S FICTION.]

[CDCB: Oh, the humanity! Somebody give me a tissue. I weep for SOF’s traumatization from tvguy’s ruthless mockery!]

 

SOF *narrates*: *sigh* Then we cut to a stupid fight scene...and then this happens..

 

[Jjs: Wait, are you referring to the fight scene or is something else going to happen? The vagueness in this show is killing me.]

[CNF: Want me to shoot you yet jjs?]

[CDCB: Should I shoot him now or wait ‘till he gets home?]

*cue scene*

"Okay, here's a new exercise," Dr. Fishkins says. "You hurt the people you don't like with these soft little bars."

 

[CNF: Remember kids, fighting always solves your problems.]

"Mallet?" SOF asks.

 

[Jjs: Impostor SOF: NEED MILK FOR ME LAWYER?!]

"No, SOF, no mallet."

 

[Jjs: No mallet for you.]

SOF began to cry.

 

[CDCB: Shaddap. I feel no sympathy.] 

[Jjs:

]

[CNF: boo hoo sob.]

 

"Mmkay, tvguy, I hate you," Deli said and smacked him in the eye with a little bar.

"YOU BITCH!"

"Don't call her a bitch! You're the noob in the room!" Ex said.

"Oh, really?"

SOF: Ok, this is really annoying now.

 

[Jjs: Now? I thought it was already annoying you before.]

 

Honestly, this is just plain not funny and my character isn’t supposed to cry...that’s just bullshit..DAMN YOU SCRIPTWRITER!

 

[Jjs: Oh the lulz. First of all, of course your character isn't supposed to cry. It's a parody of SBC members. And "DAMN YOU SCRIPTWRITER"? There is no other scriptwriters on the show, so what's the point of trying to throw a sneak jab at Dylan? Also, I'd just like to point out we've all at one point playfully teased you lits/spin-offs. SOF bias at its finest.]

[CNF: I should add SOF to one of my shows and see if I get an F on a review because "I made him cry."]

[CDCB: *sobs* ...hey, who left this bowl of onions?]

 

SOF *narrates*: Ok, we continue on next ep with Dr. Fishkins and he has another exercise planned.

 

[Jjs: "25 jumping jacks, get to it!"]

[CNF: NEVER!]

[CDCB: Never ever for never never?]

 

Something tells me that’s going to go wrong again.

 

[Jjs:   ]

 

*cue scene*

"Er... okay." He plops down a game board. "We'll play games!"

 

[Jjs: Play monopoly for eight hours while locked in a bathroom.]

[CNF: Now now jjs this isn't Squidward's Childhood...or is it? Maybe we're in a realm of bad fan-fiction where there's a town called Bikini Top, the childhood of Squidward is told badly, and a critic gives bland summarizing reviews?!?! WHAT'S NEXT A SPONGE GOES TO ATLANTIS?]

"It took you an entire day to come up with that?" spat Elastic. "HA!"

"Elastic, making fun of people is wrong."

 

[Jjs: Said no one ever.]

[CNF: Making fun of people is wrong. WE NEED BLOWTORCHES!]

"I wasn't making fun of you. Making fun of you is when I tell you that you're extremely old, you OBVIOUSLY pop a boner whenever we come in here, you're very stupid, and you have a distinct smell that remind me of death."

 

[Jjs: Damn, he's good.]

[CNF: That's just how I role bitch.]

"Actually, that's not making fun of him, those are facts," Deli pipes in.

 

[Jjs: The truth hurts.]

[CNF: Need some ice for that burn sir?]

"OKAY! LET'S JUST PLAY, OKAY!"

"YEAH, LET'S PLAY!" Dragiiin screams, poking his head in through the window.

 

[Jjs: HEEEEEERRREEE'S DRAGIIIN!]

[CNF: HELLO WORLD HOW ARE YOU?]

[CDCB: Pretty good, sure as you're born!]

SOF *narrates*: Actually, this is a bizarre scene.

 

[Jjs: Are you sure you aren't talking about your own show?]

[CNF: This isn't bizarre. It's comedy!]

[CDCB: Now that’s comedy!

Slappy: Hey, that’s my line!]

 

How could a doctor have one day to come up with the idea?

 

[Jjs: Is that even a criticism? Seriously, it can take anybody a day to come up with an idea.]

[CNF: Maybe he was doing other things than coming up with an idea all day, yah never know.]

 

If so, maybe try thinking for like a week at least.

 

[Jjs: Okay, Spin-Off Lorax. We will all take a week to come up with an idea upon your demands.]

[CNF: How the fuck would we take a week to come up with playing board games? That makes no sense sir.]

[CDCB: SOF stupidified himself with his own review.]

 

A board game is a bad idea.

 

[CDCB: You’re a bad idea!]

[Jjs: Sorry Monopoly.]

[CNF: *board games walk away crying*]

SOF *narrates*: Dr. Fishkins wanted to pick 70s to do charades for 1st part of this game…sadly it did’t work too well.

 

[Jjs: "Sadly it did't work too well"? So you're sad it worked well? Or did the poor n from "didn't" get cut out from this "review"?]

[CNF: I did not understand a word he just said tbh.]

*cue scene*

 

[CNF: 

]

 

Dr. Fishkins stares at him. "Are you serious? You weigh like seventy pounds, get the hell up." 70s immediately gets up. The therapist makes a mental note in his head: They respond to cussing.

 

[Jjs: "Hmm, the strange SBCers seem to have an immediate respond to cussing...FUCK SHIT MOTHERFUCKER SHIT DICK SUCKER ASS CUNT DOUCHE! Let's see these fascinating creatures' replies.."]

[CNF: GET UP YOU LAZY FUCK!]

 

70s selects a card and groans. He begins to wave his hands in the air.

 

[Jjs: Wave your hands in the air like you just don't care.]

[CDCB: Take it back now, y’all! Two hops! Two hops! Cha cha real smooth! Turn it up!]

"UM... UM... JELLO! YOU'RE JELLO! JELLO, JELLO, JELLO! NO, I GOT IT, YOU'RE JELLO!" SOF screams

 

[Jjs: No wonder why SOF is pissed at his portrayal here, he's raping the caps lock. Unfortunately, I think I might have to prefer SBC Therapy SOF over the Critic SOF any day.]

[CNF: Jello is a person now? So much for eating it today.]

 

70s shakes his head.

"OH, THEN IT'S JELLO, IT HAS TO BE! JELLO! YOU'RE JELLO!"

"IF IT'S NOT RIGHT THE FIRST TEN TIMES, WHY THE HELL WOULD IT BE RIGHT THE NEXT TWENTY?!" 70s yells. "GOD!"

 

[CDCB: No, it’s not God either.]
 

70s storms off to his seat.

SOF: Wow…that was bad again. Are these the real SBC members? They are barely in character..

 

[CDCB: The question is, are you the real SOF?] 

[Jjs: Of course they are the real SBC members. What, did you think they were SBM members? Also, SOF BIAS ALERT! I admittedly didn't always have the members in some of my lits (example: SBC Parallel Universe) exactly in character, but it worked. However, I've never seen you complain about it. SOF bias at its finest again.]

[CNF: SOF: I don't complain because jjs your work is god, tvguy's work is bull.]

*cue scene*

Once everyone got their tokens, SOF went first and landed on Nimrod Place.

"Do you want to buy it?"

 

[Jjs: I'll take 20!]

[CNF: If I buy this, will it help me rule the world?]

[CDCB: Well, good luck with that.]

"YES, YES, YES!"

 

[Jjs: NO, NO, NO!]

[CDCB:

]

[CNF: 

]

 

Jelly then rolled and went past SOF.

"HEEEEYYY!" SOF whined. "SHE PASSED ME!"

 

[CNF: No really?]

"Yes, those are---"

SOF picked up the board and began to bang it against the wall. After he banged it on the wall, he banged his own head against the wall and screamed, "IIIIIII HAAAAATTTTEEE THIIIIISSS GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMEEEE!"

 

[Jjs: And SOF complains about his character's portrayal in 3...2...1..]

SOF: Oh come on! Monopoly is a fun game, but this is just a horrible character of me. Ugh, moving on.

 

[CDCB: Called it.] 

[Jjs: I like how you only seem to care about your character being butchered and nobody else's. I guess the Spin-Off Lorax has to keep his legacy strong.]

[CNF: I like the out of character SOF than the SOF in this so-called critic show.]

SOF *narrates*: Ok, so Dr. Fishkins has another game for the users to play...and oh boy, there is so much wrong with this scene..

 

[Jjs: Is there so much wrong with it that you'll actually critique it or just give us more half-assed reviews with cheap jokes shot in-between?]

[CNF: I bet the wrong part will be you not happy with your appearance in this show.]

*cue scene*

"SORRY FOR LOVING SOMETHING."

 

[Jjs: You're forgiven by us, except for Critic SOF, who will probably nitpick this.]

[CNF: It's okay SOF, Monopoly is going to pull through.]

"No, I like things too."

70s snickered.

"It's just over at the forum, I ALWAYS find your Muppets all around my Sharing Time, and it's annoying."

"I LIKE MUPPETS," said Deli.

"I also like Muppets," said jjs.

 

SOF: No, jjs doesn’t like The Muppets..LOOK UP YOUR DAMN FACTS FIRST!

 

[Jjs: I don't like The Muppets? I guess SOF has control over what I do and don't like now.]

[CNF: I like Muppets.]

[CDCB: No, CNF doesn’t like The Muppets…LOOK UP YOUR DAMN FACTS FIRST!]

SOF: I know for a fact what jjs’ actual favorite shows are. In fact, here's a list. *grabs a paper and begins to read it*

 

[Jjs: Jesus Christ SOF, you're taking away from the review to make a list of what shows I like over one joke? I don't know whether to be flattered or find this to be boring filler.]

 

His favorite shows are Oban Star Racers, NINJAGO, ThunderCats, Generator Rex and of course SB! *finished reading*

 

[CDCB: Not to mention Used Napkin: Adventures of a Food Wiper! #ShamelessPromotion] 

[Jjs: Well, most of those are outdated by now, but this summary was written over a year ago, so I can't complain. Still, I love how SOF has to take time away from the actual review to nitpick over one joke.]

 

You see?

 

[Jjs: I see a half-assed attempt at being funny, yes.]

[CNF: Nope I'm blind.]

 

He didn’t say he liked it but he has own opinion,

 

[Jjs: ...What? Once you try going back to reviewing, you make zero sense again, sorry bud. Try again next time.]

[CDCB: I want to say he’s referring to The Muppets, but honestly it’s hard to tell.]

 

so deal with it!

 

[Jjs:  ]

 

*cue scene*

"Yeah, I am opinionless," jjs replied.

 

[Jjs: I'll be honest. That line did always bug me when I first read this, but nowadays I can just shrug it off. Still, I have a feeling SOF is going to come to my defense and whine over it in 3...2...1...]

SOF: No you’re not, you have an honest opinion on things.

 

[Jjs: Thanks SOF for coming to my rescue. I mean, it's obvious you must care about me that much to take away from the review to nitpick jokes that jab at me.]

 

See how the members are portrayed in this?

 

[CDCB: All I see is gratuitous gabbing. Ha, alliteration.]

[Jjs: Yes, we got you the first hundred times.]

[CNF: No, I can't see. I told you I'm blind already dammit.]

 

We come to Episode 3 which is by far the worst episode of this show.

 

[Jjs: Oh goodie, that obviously means SOF will take the time to give an honest and proper critique of it....said no one ever.]

[CDCB: That obviously means SOF will take the time to give an honest and proper cri--*jjs smacks CDCB* …thanks. I needed that.]

 

Let’s see how many things are wrong..

 

[Jjs: More like let's do a count to see how many things have been wrong with this review.]

[CDCB: Sure!

1. The title of the mini series it belongs to clearly bashes tvguy.

2. Crappy grammar

3. Opinionlessness

4. Getting off topic

5. Unfunny jokes

6. Smothered in irony

7. Hates tvguy, bashes show

8. Blatant rip-off moments of Nostalgia Critic

9. Moments where he makes absolutely no sense

10. Poor summarization]

 

*cue scene #1*

"Dr. Fishkins, the big family is here again," Barbara beeped in.

"They're related?" he asked. They now communicated through a pager.

"I dunno."

*text appears and it reads “Point #1”*

 

[Jjs: Wait, that's a mistake? On what world? They aren't a real family, it was a metaphor. This is what I mean, SOF keeps constantly grasping the straws to nitpick these. Oh well, only in SOF's world I suppose it's a mistake.]

[CNF: Um...Marco?]

[CDCB: Polo!]

*cue scene #2*

"I LOVE MANGA AND ANIME," Ex screams at the TV, which is showing a cheaply made anime.

 

[Jjs: I'm guessing SOF's beef with this scene is that he finds it racist to the Japanese. I mean Ex loving anime and manga clearly must be racist.]

[CNF: So shouting at a TV about loving Japan's work is racist now? K.]

"Ex, did you NOT do the dishes again?" Deli asks, walking up.

 

[Jjs: *cue laugh track*]

"DELI, I'M WATCHING ANIME."

"Yes, I can tell," she said and rolls her eyes. She sniffs. "Ex... I smell... is that urine?!"

 

[Jjs: I do smell it, but I think it's coming from the review.]

[CNF: How can I smell something from a piece of fan-fiction?]

[CDCB: With KaBlam’s Smell-O-Vision!]

 

"EX WATCHING ANIME," Ex says.

*text appears again with Point #2*
 

[CDCB: It’s not polite to point!]

[Jjs: ...What? Once again, how is that a mistake at all? Sure, it isn't very funny, but it's not a mistake.]

[CNF: So pissing off on the couch is offensive. K. This is getting lulzier every time.]

*cue scene #3*

"I like The Muppets," Deli says. "But I never tell ANYONE about it."

"Are you kidding?" Elastic says. "HONESTLY."

"What? I DON'T!"

"LOOK SIMON BEIN MEAN," SOF says, entranced in the show.

 

[Jjs: I guess this is what SOF is going to get riled up over.]

"Okay, Katie, I HAVE to be honest with you," Simon says. "That version of Hey Jude---"

"HEY LOOK, THE BEATLES," Jelly screams.

"--- honestly makes me what to puke up blood. It makes me what to sit on your face, and emit my human gases into your mouth. That's HOW much I hated you. I say no to Hollywood. Just... as the cool kids say today, you're a toad."

*the text appears again with “Point #3”*

 

[Jjs: 3 strikes, and you're out. It was again an attempt at comedy, but I fail to see how there's anything offensively wrong with it, unless you're pissed with your character portrayal for the umpteenth time. Seriously, not one of these three so-called "points" had any mistakes in them whatsoever!]

[CNF: Mind=fucked]

SOF *narrates*: That’s 3 points. Seriously?

 

[Jjs: 3 points that make no sense whatsoever, I may add.]

[CDCB: Seriously? You consider those points?]

[CNF: No SOF that was not 3 points. Those "points" had nothing wrong with them. N-O-T-H-I-N-G.]

 

It wasn’t even right to fix the sentence in there

 

[Jjs: What sentence? SOF, the review stopped making sense again.]

[CNF: Excuse me?]

 

but sometimes it just bugs me when people are out of their original character.

 

[CDCB: Sometimes it just bugs me when people review things without bothering to have an actual opinion and try to steal comedy bits from Nostalgia Critic.] 

[Jjs: Going to repeat what I said above: I never always portrayed the characters in SBC Parallel Universe exactly like their SBC selves (and I'm sure others have too), but you never complained. SOF bias at its finest once again.]

 

GOD FUCKING SHIT THIS SHOW IS TERRIBLE!

 

[CDCB: I’m… pretty sure God doesn’t have that kind of relationship with feces.]

[Jjs: Ooh, SOF cussed! He must be so edgy! It's funny, he hated how edgy SOA: TR was, yet he is trying too hard to be edgy here with unnecessary swears.]

[CNF: I could say the same thing about your show SOF.]

 

Now look at this next scene..

 

[CDCB: “Look at it! Look at it! I want all of you to look at it!”]

[Jjs: Oh jeez, I wonder how much "flaws" it has for our mighty critic to pick apart.]

[CNF: Oh joy...]

[CDCB: Hi Stimpy! ]

*cue scene*

"For our final exercise of the day---"

 

[Jjs: 25 push ups, GO!]

"But we haven't done any exercises today besides watching two half-assed shows," tvguy says.

 

[Jjs: Funny, I actually agree with tvguy.]

[CNF: That's a first for me too.]

"For our first and final exercise---"

 

[Jjs: 15 mountain climbs, GO!]

[CNF: We shall climb up the Mountain in the Cliff-Hangers game!]

[CDCB: And that’s why he’s called Cliff Hanger!]

"See, that's what you should've said the first time," says Ex.

SOF: You see? This is a horrible script. The dialogue is unfunny.

 

[Jjs: IRONY POLICE, WEE WOO WEE WOO! 

]

[CNF: Not every show is funny sir.]

 

The therapist is supposed to TREAT THE PATIENT, not make them act stupid!

 

[Jjs: Treat the patient? What, did you want the therapist to give them massages?]

[CNF: But...they were...already...made...stupid...to...begin...with.]

 

That’s it, I’m cutting the ep off. Because this lit sucks!

 

[CNF: Again, could say the same thing to your show bro.]

[CDCB: He’s so pissed, he forgot that it’s really a spin-off…]

[Jjs: Damn, SOF must really mean business now. It was so bad that he's cutting off the review. Well, I guess that's it everyone, we can all go home.]

 

*cue scene*

 

[Jjs: Wait a minute, I thought SOF was cutting it off? There's still more!? DAMN YOU SOF AND YOUR LIES!]

[CNF: YOU'RE TEARING ME APART, SOF!]

[CDCB: Liar, liar, plants for hire!]

"Hey, OMJ, can I come home with you?" jjs says. "I have no where else to go."

 

[Jjs: I'm homeless now it seems.]
 

"Dude, aren't you like 13?"

"Yes."

 

[Jjs: I also got an age decrease...and cue SOF coming to my defense.]

SOF *facepalms*: Why lit why? Plus, jjs is 15. Fuck this shit, then we have this scene..

 

[Jjs *facepalms*: Why SOF why? First of all, I was 14 when that SBC Therapy was posted, tvguy made one error, big deal. Second of all, I'm 16 now, but being as this "review" was posted over a year ago, I guess I can't nitpick either of you. However, I can nitpick this: I thought this review was over, you said you were cutting it off. Yet, there is still more? Why do I have a feeling SOF misplaced one of his nitpicks? Oh jeez.]

[CNF: GAH CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE OF THIS! *smashes through window*]

[CDCB: DON’T LEAVE ME HERE, CNF! *smashes through window too, making a CDCB-shaped hole*]

*cue scene*

Sooo, can I come over?"

OMJ says, " "

 

[Jjs: I guess after this was where SOF's cutting off line was supposed to go, but we can't trust SOF with consistency in these reviews.]

 

SOF *pauses for 3 seconds* OH MY GOD THIS IS FUCKING BORING!

 

[Jjs *pauses for 3 seconds*: Hey SOF, the Irony Police called again. They said your sentence has been extended to a year in prison.]

[CNF: SO IS YOUR CRITIC SHOW SIR! GOOD DAY SIR!]

 

By the way, I might as well say this now: THIS IS A LIT, NOT SPIN-OFF!

 

[CDCB: Oops. I probably shouldn’t have made that misconception earlier. Now SOF’s going to kick my butt!] 

[Jjs: Apparently SOF's running out of material to nitpick, so he's half-assing this in at the last second.]

[CNF: You already said it was a lit, so what's your point?]

 

It is BARELY SB-related except for ONE fish themed character.

 

[Jjs: SOF bias again. Underwater Survivor: SBC Style, a spin-off, has SBCers, and doesn't always involve SB characters, but you've never nitpicked that.]

[CDCB: SBCPU doesn’t even related to SpongeBob at all, and yet you adore that show.]

[Jjs: Well to be fair CD, SBCPU is a lit, but if it was a spin-off, I'm sure SOF wouldn't have criticized either way, considering he always bowed down to my works back then.]

 

The show sucks.

 

[CDCB: You're killing me, Smalls.]

[Jjs: I think we got that already after all the "BAWW THEY AREN'T IN CHARACTER BAWW IT'S UNFUNNY" complaints.]

[CNF: It does? After all the complaints I thought you would have loved it!]

 

There’s bad grammar, horrible dialogue

 

[Jjs: This just in: SOF's sentence to the Irony Jail has now been extended to two years.]

[CNF: Oh the irony in that sentence xD]

[CDCB: If I laugh any harder, I’ll break a rib.]

 

and the SBCers are made a mockery of.

 

[Jjs: Holy shit SOF, we get it already. Stop being a broken record.]

[CNF: You said that a 1,000 times already. Get over it.]

 

I just wonder if the next one will be even worse.

 

[Jjs: If it is, I wonder if your critiques will just be as bad as this one.]

 

Well, we’ll see. I’m SOF signing out! More TTT on your way!

 

[CDCB: What the heck is TTT?]

 

*leaves*

 

[CDCB: THANK YOU!]

[Jjs: And I'm cringing to see the last two. Overall, this review was really bad. As for SBC Therapy itself, I admit it wasn't anything amazing, but I don't think it's an unholy terror either. I'd say it is mediocre, really. The main issue was SOF's bias in it. All his flaws he nitpicked in this show were common in other SOs/Lits, yet he only nitpicks tvguy's because he hated him back then. Once again, SOF's other nitpicks also backfired on him. Also, I gotta say, this "review" was more of a roast of tvguy than an actual review. I wonder if SOF reviewed a tvguy work today he'd be bowing down to it. Well thanks for riffing again guys, just two more to go!]

[CDCB: Ugh, I had to literally force myself to sift through this episode. As much as I like you, SOF, this “review” is just unfair. As with the previous one, you’re fully biased over your (former) hatred for tvguy and therefore flat out bashing his work. If you’re going to bash it, at the very least I’d at least like to see some rationale behind it, but the reasons you gave were terrible. I’m sorry SOF, but your tantrums over being mocked are getting old. It’s a parody, and you should expect something like that. If the next episode keeps this up… well, let’s just say that my parents are going to have to invest a lot of money into replacing the windows.]

[CNF: Thank god I don't have to be back for another tvguy work...oh shit I do. Fuck. Welp guess I'll be here next time. Adios amigos. please get me out of here. ]

[Ron]

oh my god xDDDDDDDD "Said no one this forum ever." loved that line. 

 

also, CDCB, it wasn't a misconception, SBC Therapy is a spin-off, you were right

[dragiiin123]

fuck you guys, this show is amazing. 

[SpongeOddFan]

fuck you guys, this show is amazing. 

i hope you're joking