Fanfiction Reruns

[TJ]

Completed Season 5 episode.

Team Sponge bob - Season 5

Ep.69 “Wonderland”

Previously, on TS: Pearl was in class thinking about her membership she got with Team Spongebob yesterday. “Pearl, your in a stupor…again.” a girl named Kimberly said, tapping Pearl slightly. “Oh sorry..” Pearl said. “Ha ha, what do you do on the weekends?” Kimberly asked.

Pearl used her arrow and shot it to the end point of the ledge and caused Buzz to fall into the ditch. “AHH!” he shouted on his way down. The team quickly surrounded her. Everyone gave her positive comments.

Pearl had just gotten out of school. “Only a few weeks left till school’s out!” Melanie said. “I can certainly feel it..” Pearl said. “Yah, its been really hot lately.” Melanie replied.

Pearl arrived at the Spongy Towers. “Pearl glad you’re here. The mayor’s castle has been broken into! Lets go.” Spongebob said as everyone ran out of the tower.

The team arrived at the Mayors place and found the halls covered in the strangest ice. Linda slipped. “Linda! Are you okay? Why are these halls so icy?” Spongebob asked. “……and cold.” Patrick added. Inside the office, the team found the mayor in a block of ice and a villain putting freeze into the city power control.

“I am Icenator. I knew I’d run into you chums one day.” he said. “What are you doing?” Sandy asked. “In less than two hours, all electricity in Bikini Bottom will be frozen. Gone!” Icenator told them. “Not on out watch!” Spongebob said.

Icenator mad a tornado of snow and blasted back the whole team. The whole office was covered in snow. Icenator was gone. Linda used her ilumminapathy to shine light on the ice keeping the mayor trapped. “Thanks.” the Mayor said. “Why did he do this?” Spongebob asked. “Me and Hymen, yes that’s his name were friends in high school. We were both the smartest kids in our class. We both had ran for office after years and years in Government. After a toxic spills near his house, he had acquired mutant abilities. For that, people shunned him and he lost to be Mayor of Bikini Bottom. He then valued revenge on Bikini Bottom and me for some reason.

“Well, we can’t let him get away with freezing the town. “Look guys..” Patrick showed them. The whole city was covered in ice and snow. The team ran outside. “Everyone, CAREFUL.” Shin shouted. It was slippery and dastardly. Icenator walked down the streets, freezing cop cars. Suddenly he was hit by a snow ball. “Sup, Icy.” Shin said. Spongebob used his super speed to run up to him, but tripped on the slippery ice. “Sandy, get me into the sky.” Linda asked. Sandy telekinetically lifter her and Linda shined a huge amount of yellow light, producing heat, melting the cold climate.

"Impossible!?" Icenator said. Shin made energy constructs, keeping his arms and legs strapped. "Jail time Icy!" SpongeBob tauntingly said. "Interesting power burst..Linda." Shin said. "Thanks..." Linda said with a fading smile.

[TJ]

Team Spongebob: The Movie - Land Beyond Time

It was finally peaceful on Karate Island, until Helma an evil demon tamer came along. Helma began walking across a mystical land on Karate Island. The land was called the forbidden land . Strange events were known to have happened there. She then said a spell" Qi Tiang, Qu Tou, Feliz Navido!" Helma said. Suddenly, a huge demon rose from the ground. The demon began roaring. "Don't worry my little demon. Me and you will take over Karate Island." Helma said smiling evilly. "Well guys, we just have to check out the forbidden land and we are done checking the island." Shin said. The team walked into the Forbidden Land, where they saw a giant demon with a old woman on the demons shoulder. "Who are you?" Shin shouted. "I am Helma and this demon and I will run this island!" Helma replied. "Not without a fight, you witch!" Linda said. Shin shot bolts of black magic at the demon. The demon spurted out red power and cancelled out Shin's bolts of black magic. Shin then used white magic on the demon, pushing it away.

Helma whispered in the demon's ear. The demon shot red bolts at the team. Patrick flew on a rock trying to avoid the bolts. Patrick took another rock and flung it at Helma. She fell of the demon and hit the ground. Spongebob used koi and sped up to Helma, punching her in the stomach. "You fools must think I'm weak. I will show you..that is not the case." Helma said shooting blue lightning at Spongebob. "Uh..ouch." Spongebob said hurt. "We need to identify this demon." Linda said. "A blood sample coming up!" Shin said shooting white magic through the demon's leg. Blood poured out. Shin scooped some out. "Linda! I got it!" Shin said. Helma used magic to get back on the demon's shoulder. "Take the squirrel girl!" Helma whispered in the demon's ear. The demon did as commanded to. He picked up Sandy and ran away with her. Helma made sure the others didn't follow by shooting lightning at the rest of the team. "SANDY!" Spongebob yelled. It was too late, Helma and the demon had already gotten away with Sandy.

(Time Stands Still plays: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jw_dpsmBtBs)

"Darn it.." Shin said. "I know, we are so stupid, letting her get away with Sandy." Patrick said. "Come on guys, we did all we could to stop Helma and the demon." Linda said. "Not enough.." Spongebob said walking away. The team made a new campsite on the Forbidden Land. Spongebob was gearing up. He was ready to find Sandy. Linda walked into his tent. "Spongebob..I know your worried about Sandy." Linda said. "Well, no one else seems to be.." Spongebob said. "THAT ISN'T TRUE!" Linda argued. "YA KNOW LINDA, you walk around, innocent as heck and preach about things, spread your goodness and optimistic thinking all over the place, but you don't see that there is real danger out there." Spongebob said.

"I know.." Linda said quietly. Spongebob and Linda came out the tent. "Spongebob, take Linda and search for Sandy, me and Patrick have some research to do." Shin said. "So research is more important to you than Sandy?" Spongebob asked. "No. Dude.." Shin said. "Whatever.." Spongebob said walking away. "COME ON LINDA." he yelled. Linda and Spongebob began their search.

(Hey There Delilah Plays a little: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhfcwQw7Uao)

They started walking up a grassy hill when hundreds of demons approached them. "Oh no." Linda said. "Down worry, were stronger than them!" Spongebob said. Spongebob used koi and quickly punched his way through many on the small demons with Linda on his back. "Spongebob.. I'm scared" Linda said. As a demon grabbed her off Spongebob's back. Linda screamed. "LINDA!" Spongebob shouted. Suddenly, Spongebob was glowing red, the redness around him created a shark. Spongebob's eyes were full of pain and power. He single handedly took down all the demons, shooting red sparks of power at each and every one of the monstrous little beasts. "Spongebob.." Linda said softly. Spongebob had his eyes close, his fists clenched. He was struggling. "Spongebob..are you okay?" Linda asked as Spongebob violently grabbed her arm. "Please, Spongebob...le-t..m-e....GO." Linda struggled. "Linda.. Did I hurt you?" Spongebob asked. "Yes.." Linda said tearing. (Song Ends).

Shin and Patrick made their way to a buried library. "Patrick, look at this book. Its about the history of demon tamers." Shin said. "Demon tamers?" Patrick asked. "Demon tamers are mystical or magical people, usually women, who have a bond with a demon and can influence the demon's choices." Shin explained.

"So, you think Helma is a demon tamer?" Patrick asked. "Yes. If we kill Helma, we can easily stop the demon. I took some blood samples from the demon, which reveals the demon is a Karrabul." Shin explained. "What is a Karrabul?" Patrick asked."A Karrabul is a Type 3 Sea Demon." Shin said. Just then, small demons entered the library and began attacking Shin and Patrick. Patrick tossed large rocks at the demons. "These must be lower class demons." Shin said shooting black bolts of power at the demons. Blood was all over the place."We won?"Patrick asked. "I guess.." Shin said. The gang regrouped. "So, Helma is a demon tamer?" Spongebob asked. "Yes, I believe so." Shin said. Linda was quiet. "Linda, what's wrong?" Shin asked. "Spongebob was so scary, it was like he was a shark, out for blood." Linda said quietly. "Spongebob, are you having anger problems?" Shin asked. "No.. I don't know." Spongebob replied. Helma and Karrabul held Sandy captive in a cabin. "My friends will find me and stop your ridiculous scheme." Sandy said calmly. "You have so much hope in your little team. Tell me why?" Helma asked. "We have overcome many things in the past, and this situation is no different." Sandy said. Helma smacked her across the face. "You listen to me. Your tied up, your team still doesn't know your whereabouts, I have a large demon. Point is, you might not want to get on my bad side." Helma said. Sandy just looked at her.

Shin grabbed a piece of fur out of Sandy's tent."Man, Sandy's a wild sleeper." Shin said. He used the fur to track her down. "Guys. I think I may have found her location." Shin said. The team followed the tracker to the cabin. They busted in to find Sandy tied up to a chair. "Sandy!" They all shouted. They untied her, but Karrabul knocked down the house. Wood was all over the place. "Well, if it isn't the meddling superheroes!" Helma said.

Karrabul shot out red beams. Sandy and Spongebob used "koi" to quickly avoid the beams. Shin protected himself with a magical barrier. Pat and Linda hid under a rock wall. "Useless defense mechanisms will do you no justice." Helma said laughing evilly. Shin aimed a white bolt at Helma. The demon teleported behind Shin. "Huh?" Shin was greatly surprised at the abilities of this demon. The demon tried to squish Shin, but Shin kept avoiding its giant feet. Sandy saw a red light shine around Spongebob in the form of a shark. Spongebob's hands clenched, his eyes full of rage. "Sp-onge?" Sandy said. Helma witnessed this transformation."Hmm.." Helma thought to herself for a second. Spongebob used "koi" and quickly took off half of Karrabul's leg violently. "NOOOOÔÇØ Helma screamed. She shot lightning bolts everywhere and she and the demon escaped, but barely.

(Bad Day Starts:

)

At the campsite, the team talked "Spongebob do you have an answer for your recently violent behavior?" Shin asked. "I don't know why I went on rage, OK? I don't know." Spongebob was frustrated. Spongebob went into the woods. "Why don't you come back and talk to us Spongebob?" Linda asked. "They don't understand, neither do you.." Spongebob said. He reached for Linda's hand. He grabbed it and held it for a minute. They both looked at the Full Moon. "They say crazy things happen on the night of the full moon you know." Linda said. (Song Ends). The next day Sandy and Spongebob went to a library. "I can't find any info on your monstrous transformation Spongebob." Sandy said. "You wont find it here, darling." a shadowed man said. "I am Qi Tung." he said. "We know who you are." Spongebob said. In a split second, Sandy and Spongebob was taken by Qi Tung's men who were stronger than them.

"Where are we?" Sandy asked. "My laboratory dear. I don't want to hurt you guys, I want to explain Tei Qung" Qi Tung said. "What is that?" Spongebob asked. "What you now have son. The spirit of the shark. Many master martial artist have acquired this. Unless controlled, it can and will try to eat you up and turn you into a lonely, violent, and monstrous person." Qi Tung explained. "Thank you.. Qi Tung." Spongebob said. Sandy and Spongebob explained to the team. "So Spongebob has the spirit of a shark eh?" Shin asked. ÔÇ£Yes and he has to control it or it will eventually hurt him in the long run.ÔÇØ Sandy explained. Linda put her hand on Spongebob's. "I know you won't let this beat you.." Linda said. "Spongebob just stared at her, his eyes met with hers, but with the team watching, they laid back their urges to kiss. "Listen Karrabul, that Spongebob gets out of control in battle.. If we push him over his boiling point, we might just be able to put an end to those pesky fools." Helma explained.

The team went to the very same spot on the Forbidden Lands that they first battled Helma and Karrabul on. "Its time to end this Helma." Shin shouted. "Your so right." Helma said back intending a double meaning. Shin shot black bolts at Helma. Helma used her light blue electricity and threw it to the bolts. An explosion occurred. Patrick levitated rocks and pounded the demon's face. Helma whispered in his ear. The demon stepped on the ground and was able to cause a small quake. Patrick fell as Linda shined her light at the demonÔÇÖs eyes. Karrabul rubbed his eyes a bit. He was stalled.

Linda used her illuminapathy to heal the psionic attacks on Patrick's head from the quake. Helma whispered in the Karrabul's ear. Karrabul aimed his bolts of yellow power at Linda. Linda ran as the bolts impacted with the ground. Flinging her away. Karrabul than aimed at her again and again. He made a huge quake. Linda was badly hurt. Spongebob got really angry. "YOU'LL REGRET THAT." Spongebob said launching through Karrabul's heart. The demon fell down. Shin shot a black bolt at Helma It went through her heart and killed her. Spongebob continued to attack Karrabul. In minutes, Karrabul's body parts were splattered everywhere. Spongebob's spirit was leaving him, slipping away. "Spongebob, your not a demon, your not a monster! Please, don't let you get yourself!" Linda said with tears. "L-IN-DA..I-TS...TOO LATE." Spongebob said pained. "No. Its not." Linda said as she grabbed Spongebob tightly and kissed him. Sandy was in shock, while Shin and Patrick applauded. Spongebob was calm. His spirit was returned. "Spongebob.." Linda said softly. "Linda.." Spongebob said softly.

(Goodbye plays:

)

"Well guys. We did it. After almost an entire year of fighting. We cleansed all evil from Karate Island." Shin said. "That's it huh.." Sandy said. The portal opened to Bikini Bottom. "Goodbye Shin." Patrick said hugging him. Sandy hugged Shin too. Then Spongebob, then Linda. "I'm really gonna miss you guys." Shin said with tears pouring out his eyes. Spongebob, Sandy, Linda, and Patrick waved goodbye as they left Karate Island for good. They were now back at Bikini Bottom. "Well, Spongebob. What now?" Linda asked. "This.." Spongebob said kissing Linda passionately.

---------------

Music Selection:

Time Stands Still: All American Rejects

Hey There Delilah: Plain White T's

Bad Day: Daniel Powter

Goodbye: Plankeye

[TJ]

Get ready for a Special one hour, Team SpongeBob Event!

"Shin!" Pearl said surprised.

Several bombs launched to the roof.

Shin transported Pearl and himself away.

-------

"OMG!" Sandy says.

"Missed me?"

"Mikey!" Sandy shouts.

Karrate Island has SECRETS!

"What conspiracy?" Shin and Linda asked.

-------

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Pearl yells, backing to the door.

"PEARL, WAIT. " Pintar yells

Love surfaces, as the plot THICKENS!

"Sandy, I am so in love with you..and I've never felt like this for anyone..." Patrick told her.

--------

"Some more tea?" Cassandra asked as the both of them had a tea for two on the roof.

"Sure!" Shin said.

-------

"The police might "dispose" of you if they hear you asking me that question." Pintar teased.

He jumped off the roof, into an alley way. She shot several arrows which exploded trash cans. Making gas cover the mysterious "artist", allowing him to get away.

Pearl jumped down into the alley and saw a strange grafitte art he put on the wall.

It read:

ΣΥΝΩΜΟΣΙΑ

Team SpongeBob - Season 6: Age Of The Airborne Disease

Ep.85/86 "Secrets Of Karate Island"

2/14/12 A Valentines Day Special Premiere!

[TJ]

Team SpongeBob - Season 6: Age Of The Airborne Disease
Ep.85/86 "Secrets Of Karate Island"

Ep.85 "Terrors"

11:00 AM December 31st, 2012

SpongeBob was ready to be prepped for the Queen's New Years Eve Social Party at The Conference House, Karate Island. He was in a towel having just stepped out the shower. He talked amongst his friends in the White Tower living room lounge.

"Why are you the only one that gets to go?" Linda asked. "The Queen just wants one represenive from our team. Preferabbly, the leader." SpongeBob explained. "When DID we ever state you were our leader?" Patrick asked. "Yea! Just like we never voted in the name 'Team SpongeBob'! " Sandy stated.

"Guys.." SpngeBob started. "I'm leaving." Pearl said getting off the counch. "Where?" Shin asked. "Ouut" Pearl said leaving.

11:30 AM December 31st, 2012

Pearl gazed around the mainland of Karate Island. The capital, where the White Queen, Cassandra lives.

From the corner of her eye, she saw a distressed crowd shouting at a man on top of the local church. He had on a black outfit with red water shooters, only instead of water, came our spray graffiti!

"Pressured Air.." Pearl thought.

The croud screamed as the graffiti spray cracked ground. Pearl got on top of the roof and shot arrows at him. His spray was powerful enough to com-bust her arrows.

He jumped off the roof, into an alley way. She shot several arrows which exploded trash cans. Making gas cover the mysterious "artist", allowing him to get away.

Pearl jumped down into the alley and saw a strange graffiti art he put on the wall.

It read:

ΣΥΝΩΜΟΣΙΑ

Pearl took a picture of it.

She called in the team. They met her in the alley.

"SpongeBob-"

"Is getting ready for the social." Shin reminded Pearl.

"This graffiti.." Linda said.

"Know what it means?" Pearl asked.

"N-o. Shin?"

"Not me. Pat?"

"Nah."

"Why even ask him?!" Pearl said.

"Hey!" Patrick said, offended.

"I'll search up this word's..(if it is that)...meaning and you guys find the criminal." Linda said. With that, Pearl and the boys, Shin and Pat, all took off.

12:00 PM December 31st, 2012

The three looked around and found the mysterious painter, spraying a group of police men out of his way. Pearl shot an arrow at the machinery on him, that produce his spray paint. He quickly pushed himself out of the way.

Shin launched down white magic down on him, but he avoided it. Patrick attacked him with huge boulders. He sprayed the ground beneath him to lift him up and over the rocks. He then sprayed Pat's eyes. "Ahhhh" Patrick cried. "PAT!" Shin and Pearl screamed.

Linda arrived. "IT MEANS CONSPIRACY.." she shouted. "In Greek.." she ended, finally caught up to Shin and Pearl.

The spray painter blasted onto a roof, leaving a trail of red paint spray. "I GOT HIM. You two heal Patrick." Pearl shouted.

She climbed onto the roof by latter.

"Who..Are you?" Pearl asked tensed.

"Call me Pintar." he said.

"Why.."

"I don't want to willingly hurt the citizens of the Mainland. I want to scare them away. So, I am terrorizing them." Pintar revealed.

"That's CRAZY! Why do they need to be scared away?" Pearl asked.

"A conspiracy is going on. I spelled it in Greek so the officials wouldn't know anyone is on to them. I hoped some smart soul would figure it out. Looks that's you!" He blushed.

"Not me. My friend." Pearl said.

Shin came up.

"Shin!" Pearl said surprised. Several bombs launched to the roof. Shin transported Pearl and himself away.

"NO! Pintar!" Pearl yelled.

"I-m..sorry?" Shin asked.

"He was going to finish telling me about the conspiracy!" Pearl said.

"What conspiracy?" Shin and Linda asked.

"Now we'll never know.." Pearl said.

"Hmm.." Shin said thinking.

"Pat..are your eyes okay?" Linda asked.

"I..can't see.." Patrick cried.

Hours later, January 1st, 2013 12:00 AM.

Shin called SpongeBob on his communicator.

They both had a lot to tell each other.

[Old Man Jenkins]

43. The Fucker/Just One Bite

One day, Spongebob attends class at Mrs. Puff's Boating School. Spongebob is trying to organize his vibrators but can't seem to organize them just right, prompting him to ask the poor sap sitting next to him whether his quiz vibrator should be next to the essay vibrator or next to the test vibrator. The poor sap tells him he "should put it up his"- but before they could finish their line, Spongebob resolves that the essay vibrator should be next to the quiz vibrator and turns it horizontally to face his paper just in case he needs to prep for an essay. Mrs. Puff comes in fashionably late as usual, joking about almost getting carjacked by some marlin on the way to class, but it was in bad taste. She then eases the awkwardness by telling the class to put on their rape faces (which they literally do) and welcome their new classmate, Flats the Flounder.

She asks Flats to tell the class a few things about himself, telling them quite bluntly that "I like to fuck people's butts." this arouses Puff Mama and she gives him a congratulatory Good Noodle star to arouse Flats but he's not interested before taking a seat next to Spongebob. Spongebob proceeds to introduce himself to the new student and Flats responds with "Hi Spongebob. I'm gonna fuck your butt." Spongebob is flabbergasted at first before casually laughing it off, saying he thought Flats said he wanted to fuck his butt. Flats tells Spongebob that he means it, which causes Spongebob to burst in laughter again. Flats, trying to prove he's serious, unzips his pants, rips off his pubic hairs to reveal his flat penis which begins to utter the words "I fucking mean it!" finally showing Spongebob the ugly truth that Flats does mean it.

Spongebob calls Flats a motherfucker, which Flats takes pride in telling Spongebob that he'll fuck his mother's butt next. Spongebob asks Mrs. Puffs if he could be excused for the rest of his life, but she tells him that Puff Mama's gotta pay bills before telling him to sit the fuck down. Spongebob sits the fuck back down, trembling in fear. Puff asks Flats to come up to the board and draw a picture of a four-way intersection for the class. Flats takes his time, hurring here and there as he puts on the final touches. Flats' flat body obscures the drawing and Puff asks him to kindly move the fuck out of the way so the class can see what he drew, which he does. The drawing is of Flats having a four way with Spongebob, Mrs. Puffs and Mrs. Squarepants. The drawing depicts him fucking them all in the butt at the same time quite graphically. Puff is impressed and says we have an artist in the class, but Flats is still not buying her before taking his seat again.

Once class concludes, Spongebob's takes refuge in the school toilet, lamenting over his dire situation and asks himself why Flats would want to fuck his butt since he claims to have said he never spoke two words to the guy before realizing he spoke three. Spongebob begins contemplating growing a mustache and changing his name to "Ben Dover" before the stall door began to open. Spongebob acts casual as some random guy opens the toilet seat only to see a common household sponge floating in the toilet water. The guy leaves to go cut himself in the other stall. Spongebob sighs in relief, thinking that it would be Flats and right as he said it, Flats come barging in. Spongebob tries to make Flats see the error in his ways by ad lobbing a Forrest Gump quote about how life is like a bucket of wood shavings except when their in a pail, or some shit like that. Flats takes the quote to heart and says that it makes him realize that now, "I'm gonna fuck your butt twice as hard." before casually leaving Spongebob to flush down his sorrows.

Spongebob makes his way to a pay phone and calls up Patrick so that he could help Spongebob "rough Flats up a little". Patrick asks if this is Pizza Castle, but Spongebob tells him to shut the fuck up and listen, which Patrick responds "oh hey Mario". Spongebob tells Patrick that's it's Spongebob, prompting Patrick to ask him if he works at Pizza Castle now. Spongebob tells Patrick of his situation with Flats, but Patrick says that Flats is his old buddy from Community College (who would've thought Patrick went to college) and how he came to visit him for pizza. Patrick begins to tell Spongebob graphic stories about how he and Flats would fuck people's butts during their frat days before realizing that Flats has to leave soon to fuck some guy's butt. Spongebob has already left Patrick hanging, leaving him to ask if this is Pizza Castle again.

Spongebob goes to Mrs. Puff and explains to her his dire situation. Mrs. Puff is appalled to hear that Flats would rather fuck Spongebob's butt over her's and vows that no students' butt will get fucked over her in HER class. She leaves to go talk to Flats and Spongebob goes to eat lunch in peace. When lunch concludes, Puff calls Spongebob over and says that it's all been one big misunderstanding. That where Flats comes from "fucking people's butts means he wants to be your friend...with benefits of course." and judging from the look on here face, Flats fucked Puff good. As Puff excuses Flats' actions to Spongebob, the camera pans out to Flats sculpting a sand sculpture of Spongebob in the background before proceeding to fuck it until it crumbles down to the ground. Spongebob shits a brick (haha more square humor) and says he's got diarrhea before consulting to his toilet hideaway again for the rest of class.

Spongebob tries to make his escape as the bell rings but he catches sight of man who appears to be related fish since all fish of the same species and looks alike are most likely related. Spongebob asks if he's Flats' dad, which he says he is. Spongebob begins to explain to Mr. Flounder his dire situation but before he could finish, Flats shows up from out of nowhere and scold his dad about talking to strangers. Mr. Flounder leans over to Spongebob and says "Now he's gonna fuck my butt!" prompting Spongebob to make a run for it, leaving Mr. Flounder to his sad fate. Spongebob runs frantically throughout town shouting that "he's gonna fuck my butt!" before pointing off to the distance, which happens to be where Old Man Jenkins (played by himself) is standing. The townspeople are all like "so you like fucking butts, do ya? We'll show you old fart!" which OMJ replies "I love the young people" which doesn't help his case at all and the Bikini Bottomites proceeds to fuck OMJ up.

Spongebob hides out in a dumpster to think his escape plan through before a garbage truck begins to take out the trash. Spongebob jumps out in the nick of time and sees that the garbage truck is being driven by Flats! Spongebob tries to outrun Flats before jumping out of the truck's path and slipping in his reliable essay vibrator into the exhaust pipe, causing it to assplode with Flats inside. Flats later wakes up in a hospital bed to see Spongebob and Dr. Gilliam at his side. Gilliam explains that Spongebob performed mouth to mouth on Flats for over five hours straight. Spongebob says that the EMTs said Flats would have been fine but he wanted to make sure he was ok regardless. Flats said "I'll have to remember that when I'm fucking your butt. Is that rubber fist for me?" Which prompts Spongebob to make a break for home again.

Before Spongebob returns home however, he makes a detour at Skodwarde's house to get some assistance. Skodwarde has been at home doing oilseed all day and is not amused that Spongebob has once again gained entry into his lair. Spongebob explains to Skod his dire situation, but the squid nazi could seemingly care less. With all hope lost, Spongebob goes home and accepts his sad fate. Skodwarde realizes that nobody gets to fuck with Spongebob but him so he uses his god powers to make Spongebob unfuckable. Flats forces his way into Spongebob's house and says "let's do this!" before prepping himself by cracking his kuckles, brushing his teeth, pumping on his penis pump. He makes Spongebob put on a blindfold and goes to fuck his butt, but some otherworldly force is preventing him from gaining entry into Spongebob's bow. Spongebob says that he's ready but Flats still can't fuck his butt no matter which of his many holes tries to put it through. Spongebob realizes this and happily exclaims that he can get to go to work tomorrow. After some nautical nonsense involving flipping patties, taking a bath, Jellyfishing, sleeping, and large amounts of cockblocking, Spongebob finally returns to class the next week without fear. Flats finally passes out from exhaustion and overexertion. Spongebob then makes a speech to the class that fuckers never win or some shit like that before Mrs. Puff comes in to see Flats laid out, prompting her to fuck Spongebob up as the episode ends. Meanwhile, Patrick gets a mushroom pizza from Mario and Luigi at Pizza Castle and Skodwarde spends the rest of his day taking shots of Vodka for each time "fuck" was uttered in this episode.

43b. One day, after wishing a slow, painful death upon another customer, Spongebob catches wind of Skodwarde saying that he hates Krabby Patties. Spongebob chastises the squid nazi for this because apparently the only reason why people say they hate Krabby Patties is because they never had one. I guess Your Shoe's Untied isn't canon. Spongebob tries to get Skodwarde to have just one bite but Skodwarde isn't having it at all. Spongebob says that Krabby Patties are good for your soul but Skodwarde replies that he doesn't have a soul and is damn proud of it!

As Skodwarde is reading some more Mein Kampf behind the register and eating some bon bons, Spongebob slips a patty into his box of chocolates, tricking the squid nazi into consuming that heart attack on a bun. Skodwarde jazzes his pants (or lack thereof) before regaining his composure once he noticed Spongebob watching. Skodwarde uses his god powers to kill what's left of the patty and sent it straight to hell, no doubt crushing Spongebob's spirit. Once Spongebob left tO go cut himself, Skodwarde raises the patty from it's grave and began to consume it whole before scavenging through the garbage for his next fix. Skodwarde snorts the trashed patty up his nose and consumed it before placing in a fake order to Spongebob. Spongebob complies and decides to bestow the gift of this patty to the customer personally, thwarting Skodwarde's plans. When nobody came to claim the juicy morsel, Spongebob nom nom it profusely, no doubt crushing Skodwarde's spirit.

Back at home and suffering from withdrawal, Skodwarde proceeds to have a patty induced fantasy where he rapes a life-size Krabby Patty, makes babies with it, marrying it, before finally killing it and it's children in order to stop paying child support before finally waking up. Skodwarde resolved that he needed just "one more" in order to satisfy his appetite for eternity. So he uses his god powers to beam towards the Krusty Krab before creeping his way inside, tripping the security system. After some nautical nonsense involving god powers, flamethrowers and gasoline, Skodwarde finally made his way to the patty vault. He uses his god powers to conjure up a sky hook and proceeded to connect it to the vault in order to air lift out of there. Spongebob came in, saying he always comes to work at 3 am. Spongebob seduces that Skodwarde is addicted to Krabby Patty and proceeds to rub it all over the squid nazi's unsure face. Skodwarde asks "Does this look unsure to you?" but before Spongebob could answer, Skodwarde used his god-like strength to sucker punch Spongebob straight into the wall. Skodwarde tried to make his escape on the sky hook, but Spongebob recovered and jumped into the vault at the nick of time in order to prevent the vault's theft.

Skodwarde was inside the vault, eating out the patties like no one else. Spongebob charges towards him before throwing a few karate punches, which Skodwarde evaded by throwing a patty into Spongebob's face, obscuring his vision. Skodwarde ate about twenty patties at the same time and was only growing stronger from the heart attacks on buns. Spongebob pounced to attack, but Skodwarde assumed his deadly eight tentacled god form, looking more like an octopus than a squid. He used his four of his tentacles to block Spongebob's attacks as he was preoccupied with devouring the vault whole. Spongebob advises him not to eat too many patties at one time which Skodwarde scoffs, saying if he'll blow up. Spongebob denies his claim and says that it'll all go straight to his testicles. Skodwarde looked down at his now inflamed testes before Spongebob confirms that after that, then he'll blow up, which he does, taking the vault and sky hook down with them. Skodwarde's head (which head is up for speculation) is then taken to a rehab center as his medic recalls his first Krabby Patty and how the saying, "not even once" rings true for his situation. Meanwhile, Spongebob spends the rest of his morning snorting up some patties of his own.

[Sabre]

I'm going to do a run down of my top three favorite episodes of the show (So far) Here we go with number three...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GBxObBOGD8&feature=channel_video_title

Season 3 episode 16 (56)- "Squidward in Da House"

Patrick: (In an empty Krusty Krab, Spongebob and Patrick are sitting around looking bored) Your boring Spongebob, stop boring me with your boringness...

Spongebob: Sorry buddy, I guess I just can't think of anything fun to do today

Patrick: Thank Neptune you have a best friend like me then (He pulls out a firecracker) I bought this beauty from the gift shop when I visited Bikini Atoll

Spongebob: (Scared) Are you sure those things are legal?

Patrick: I don't know much...So no, I don't know if they're illegal (He places it onto the table and pulls out a match) But we won't find out staring at it

Mr Krabs: (In his office, he's on the phone) ...Yeah, I know the safety inspector is coming tomorrow...Everything's is ship shape and ready for him, and there's absolutely nothing that could go wrong...Nothing at all...(He hears an explosion) Hold that thought... (He puts the phone down and walks out of his office to see Patrick and Spongebob sitting in the middle of the destroyed Krusty Krab) Why do I ever let you two in here before we open?

Spongebob: Mr Krabs, are you angry at us?

Mr Krabs: Of course not

Spongebob: Then why are you chocking Patrick? (Mr Krabs looks at his claws that are around Patrick's neck)

Mr Krabs: (Angrily) It's for his own enjoyment!

Squidward: (Outside of his house, he's watering his flowers) At least Patrick's not around to eat my plants...Or the watering can (He continues to water the plants as he notices Squilliam on the other side of the street) Oh no, not...

Squilliam: ...Sir Squilliam Arthur-Reginald Fancyson gracing you with his magnificent presence (Everyone cheers)

Squidward: Gee, it's like he's some sort of movie star...

Squilliam: I smell the stench of failure...Oh wait, it's just my nemesis (He walks up Squidward) Squidward Tentacles is that you under those peasant clothes?

Squidward: Only if that's Squilliam Fancyson under that huge, swell head

Squilliam: I've heard better come backs from a corpse (He 'accidentally' stands on his flowers) Oops

Squidward: Don't you know when your not wanted Squilliam, and I really don't want you here

Squilliam: Oh by the way, I've found a space in my schedule so I'll be coming over later for some light lunch

Squidward: I don't think so, you can't just waltz on over here and arrange a tea in my house without my permission

Squilliam: Well then I guess you won't mind me shaming you amongst the community

Squidward: Why would I? You do it all the time

Squilliam: I guess you don't know that I'm good friends with the head of the Bikini Bottom Musical Arts committee who I could get to sign you up like that (He flicks his fingers)

Squidward: What time should we say then?

Plankton: (In the Chum Bucket, Plankton is sulking at a table) The food's practically edible, I can sort of force myself to smile so why don't I get customers? (He looks around at the cracked walls and insects everywhere) I guess the dungeon theme doesn't suit some people (He stands up) And instead of doing any manual labor I'll need to find a place to sale chum that's less 'vile' or 'disturbing'

Squidward: (He's in Sadie's bedroom sitting on her bed and talking with her) So Sadie, My nemesis who you've never met is coming over so I want you to call him 'uncle' or 'uncy Squilliam', whatever (He stands up) So I'll be spending the rest of the day in the tea room and probably won't be out for a long time

Sadie: So you're spending all day in that one room?

Squidward: That's what I just said

Sadie: So what should I do for all that time?

Squidward: (He walks towards the exit) I don't know, girly things - Read a book or do a crossword (He leaves and Sadie picks up her cell phone)

Sadie: Or have an... (She puts the phone up to her ear) ...ATTIC PARTAY!

Sandy: (She runs into the ruins of the Krusty Krab) I came here as fast as I could... (She looks around) ...Wow it looks like a bomb hit this place

Patrick: I would hardly call it a bomb, more of a small nuclear weapon

Spongebob: Don't worry Mr Krabs, Sandy will have this place cleaned up in no time, will you Sandy?

Sandy: No

Mr Krabs: Then why are you even here?

Sandy: I won't clean it up, but my machine will

Mr Krabs: Really?

Sandy: Sure, this place just needs a woman's touch...A mechanical woman that's more machine than woman, but you know what I mean

Mr Krabs: So...Where is it?

Sandy: Oh I haven't build it yet, it won't take long

Mr Krabs: But I need this placed cleaned up now

Sandy: You can't rush science Mr Krabs, although ironically I did with my device that speeds things up

Mr Krabs: Well how am I supposed to sale Krabby Patties in this place?

Sandy: Well...You can't, but I've told you it'll only take a few...

Mr Krabs: That'll never do, I need to find a place to sale food while your working on that robot man thingy

Sandy: It's a mechanical wom...

Mr Krabs: Do I look like I care?

Sandy: No, no you don't

Sadie: (She's at the front of Squidward's house as many teenagers flood into the house) Wow, I don't even know half of these guys

Jack: Hey Sandra

Sadie: It's Sadie

Jack: No, I'm Jack (He walks inside with everyone else) Come on in, there's plenty of space (Pearl walks up to her)

Pearl: How did you get your dad to agree to this? My dad would have shouted at me and then given me two cents to go out and 'have a good time'

Sadie: Lets just say, he doesn't know

Pearl: So, he's out?

Sadie: No, But I've got it all under control (She looks inside) ...Try not to puke on that rug...Or in that vase (Scene cuts to Squilliam and Squidward in the tea room)

Squilliam: (He looks around the room) I like this room

Squidward: Really?

Squilliam: Wait, not like, hate (Squidward stares at him angrily)

Squidward: When did you say you had to leave again?

Squilliam: Forcing you guest to leave? The head of the Bikini Bottom Musical Arts committee won't like that

Squidward: (Under his breath) He's not the only one that doesn't like someone

Squilliam: What did you say?

Squidward: More tea?

Mr Krabs: (He's in his office, crying) I can't afford to not make any profit for a whole hour...I'm barely scraping by now (He wipes away his tears with a fifty dollar bill)

Spongebob: Hey, why don't you use your house as a place to sale Krabby Patties?

Mr Krabs: I've got an even better idea, why don't we use your house?

Spongebob: Great idea!

Mr Krabs: Then what are we waiting for? (They walk out of the Krusty Krab)

Spongebob: Don't mind Gary, he just likes his alone time doing...I don't actually know (They walk towards Spongebob's house)

Squilliam: So Squidward, what have you been doing with your dull, dull life since I last saw you?

Squidward: I didn't shoot anyone if that's what you mean

Squilliam: Not this again

Squidward: Yes this again (They hear a smash from outside the room)

Squilliam: Sounds like your crummy house is falling to pieces (Squidward stands up)

Sadie: (She hurries the teenagers into the attic as she quickly places the pieces of broken vase onto the table) Barry, why'd you always have to break stuff?

Barry: That's just my style, babe (She climbs into the attic as Squidward opens the door and sees his smashed vase)

Squidward: That was my favorite vase, how'd it break?

Squilliam: Maybe you just looked at it (He laughs)

Squidward: Another terribly unfunny sarcastic remark from Squilliam Fancyson (He shuts the door behind him)

Plankton: (He walks past Squidward's house as he sees the teenagers walking inside) Look at all those hungry teenagers, they sure look...hungry (He walks towards the house) I know who and what can feed them...Me and chum (He laughs as he sneaks inside with the teenagers) Now, where to set up shop (He looks around to see the basement) Hmm...The damp darkness of the basement should work perfectly and won't be a drastic step upwards from the Chum Bucket (He walks down the basement as the teenagers continue to walk into the house)

Spongebob: (He walks to his house with Mr Krabs following him) You wait inside while I go and check on Sandy and the machine (He opens the door as he runs off towards the treedome)

Patrick: (He sprints towards his house) Need a pee, need a pee, need a p...(He slams into the bathroom door, getting up he realizes the door is locked) Of all the times and all the bathrooms that could be locked (He barges into the door but it won't budge)

Sandy: (In the treedome, she steps back from the machine as it starts to melt) Please, not again (Spongebob runs in)

Spongebob: How's the machine Sandy?

Sandy: It worked perfectly, then the sunlight shone through my glass dome and it melted the plasticine in the machine...then it happened again, and again, then again and surprisingly not that time but the time after that and after that...

Spongebob: Why don't you come over to my place and do your thing there?

Sandy: Gee thanks Spongebob, I'll gather my things and I'll be over in a minute

Spongebob: No problem...(He giggles) ...Girlfriend (He leaves and walks towards his house)

Sadie: (The teenagers are making lots of noise in the attic) Please try and keep the noise at a minimum

Janey: Did you say MAXIMUM?!

Sadie: You know I didn't (Janey walks over to the record player and turns it on as the music starts to play...)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhoPnUEqpto

Squilliam: (In the tea room, they can here the music coming from somewhere) Do you hear that music?

Squidward: Yeah, it sounds like it's coming from the attic (He gets up and walks towards the door)

Squilliam: Leaving your guests alone? The head...

Squidward: (Mimiking Squilliam) ....of the Bikini Bottom Musical Arts committee won't like that (He sits back down)

Squilliam: Now let me tell you about my awards...

Squidward: Please don't

Squilliam: It would be my pleasure (Squidward sighs)

Sadie: (She turns off the record player as the teenagers all look at her) Now please, no more noise (Plankton bursts into the attic)

Plankton: Hey kids, Come to the basement now for food and that's an order you spoiled little brats (The teenagers all look at eachother and clamber out of the attic towards the basement) Come on, there's plenty of chum for you all

Sadie: Hey, you can't come here to advertise

Plankton: Watch me, sister (He follows the teenagers down the attic stairs and towards the basement)

Sadie: Only now do I realize the flaw in this idea (She follows them down the stairs making sure they don't make a noise)

Mr Krabs: (In Spongebob's house, he's in the kitchen) So I'll put Cashy there (He points to the window when he notices Plankton leading the teenagers down to Squidward's basement) Plankton?! With customers?! He's not allowed to have those (He runs out of the house as the phone starts to ring in Spongebob's house)

Spongebob: (He walks into his house as the phone stops ringing) Mr Krabs, are you here? (He hears Mr Krabs calling from Squidward's window)

Mr Krabs: Come on lad, we don't have all day

Spongebob: (He walks into Squidward's house) Are you sure Squidward will allow us in his house?

Mr Krabs: Yeah sure whatever, now lets go make some green stuff

Spongebob: It's just that he gets angry at me and Patrick even if we come within a seventy foot radius of his house

Mr Krabs: But you live right next to him

Spongebob: I guess that's why he's always angry (They both walk down the basement to see Plankton selling chum to the teenagers)

Plankton: Krabs! (He walks up to Plankton) Get off my turf Krabs

Mr Krabs: This ain't your turf

Sadie: It ain't not any of your turfs...Wait, what?

Mr Krabs: Hey, who's sick of Plankton's chum? (A teenager is sick on the floor) Not what I meant but, who would rather have a delicious, not really nutricious, Krabby Patty? (Everyone cheers)

Sadie: Oh brother

Squilliam: ...And of course you know I won the ultimate fancy award that year as well as the... (Squidward sighs then stands up)

Squidward: How about you shut up while I go and make some snacks

Squilliam: Good idea, My mouth is dry from boasting so much

Squidward: Tell me about it

Squilliam: Oh I will, when you return

Squidward: Can't wait (He rolls his eyes as he leaves the room and walks towards the kitchen) I suppose I could poison the coral bits (He walks into the kitchen) Hey, where are my coral bits...and my oven

Mr Krabs: (In the basement, Mr Krabs has the oven and throws out the coral bits) Now for the patties (He throws them onto the grill and starts to cook them) Don't worry, there's plenty more where they came from (Plankton throws chum at his face) So it's a food fight you want

Sadie: Please no

Plankton: Bring it on Krabs (He grabs for the chum) You're going down (They both start throwing food as Sadie watches on in horror)

Mrs Puff: (She knocks on Spongebob's front door loudly) Open up you little freak, I've got a schedule to keep (She notices Sandy walking towards Squidward's house carrying the machine) Excuse me miss, Do you know where Spongebob is? I've been calling him all day, he just needs to take a quick driving test around town so I can see how much he's 'improved' since I gave him his license

Sandy: Sure Mrs Puff, I'll just go get him (Sandy walks into Squidward's house carrying the machine) You stay there (She puts the machine down as she walks down into the basement to see the huge food fight) What the nuts?! (She runs up to Spongebob) What's going on?

Spongebob: Plankton and Mr Krabs started a FOOD!... (He ducks as a Krabby Patty misses his head) ...Fight and now everyone's joined in (They both duck down)

Sandy: Oh yeah, Mrs Puff wants to see you...

Spongebob: What for?

Sandy: Some sort of driving test, she didn't really say much

Spongebob: Driving test? (He starts to shake as he walks out of the basement)

Sandy: Now to go and work on my invention (A chum stick misses her foot) Really now, was there any need for that...Such a weak shot (She picks up a Krabby Patty) Who wants this? (Everyone steps back as Plankton raises his hand)

Plankton: I want it... (She throws it at him)...But obviously not the way you mean (They all continue to throw food around the basement)

Sadie: That is enough, no one throw anymore food while I go get something to clean this up

Mr Krabs: What did she say?

Jack: I don't know (They all continue to throw food)

Sadie: (She walks past the tea room as Squidward emerges)

Squidward: Can you come and talk to Squilliam for a second, he's getting on my nerves even more than usual (He pushes her into the room) You keep him entertained while I go check on that noise coming from the basement...I bet it's Spongebob's snail again (He starts to walk away as Sadie gets anxious)

Squilliam: So you're new here aren't you? Where did Squidward say he found you again...A dumpster?

Sadie: Yeah, whatever you say (She quickly gets up and leaves the room)

Squilliam: Like father like daughter (He sips his tea)

Sadie: (She catches up with Squidward on the stairs) Don't worry about the noise, Just go talk to Squilliam, you don't want him to do whatever you said he was going to do, do you?

Squidward: I guess you're right although it made absolutely no sense (He walks back into the room and sits down)

Squilliam: Now where was I? Oh yes, I won the award for...

Sadie: (She walks into the basement to see everyone still fighting) Come off it you guys (She looks around) Hey, where's Janey?

Squilliam: (He's still talking to Squidward) ...But of course I couldn't accept that award without making a speech first

Squidward: Of course not (He rolls his eyes as Janey walks into the room)

Janey: Hey Sades, do you know where a gal can get a head bandage around here, that chum hit me in the head real hard (She rubs her head)

Squidward: (Confused) What are you doing in my house? (Plankton and Mr Krabs burst into the room fighting)

Plankton: Give up Krabs

Mr Krabs: NEVER!

Squidward: What are you doing in my... (Spongebob crashes his boat into the side of the room as Mrs Puff inflates) How'd you manage to crash into the room, it's on the second floor

Mrs Puff: He's a VERY bad driver

Squidward: (The walls starts to crack and Sandy falls into the room with the machine) Ok, what the hell is going on here? What are you all doing in...Wait, I'm not even going to say it as someone else will probably burst in (Water floods into the room as Patrick strolls in)

Patrick: Your toilets clogged up again Squidward

Squidward: Just get out, all of you (He sulks) You all ruined my only chance to impress my arch nemesis (Spongebob gets out of the boat)

Spongebob: Aww...Were all really sorry Squidward

Mr Krabs: Sorry Mr. Squidward

Jack: Sorry Mr. Tennisballs (All the teenagers nod their heads)

Patrick: What did I do?

Mrs Puff: Sorry Squidward...But for the record - Spongebob was driving

Pearl: Yeah, whatever

Sandy: Sorry partner

Squidward: You all should be (They all look at the ground)

Squilliam: Do you know all these people?

Squidward: Unfortunatly

Squilliam: So...They're all your friends?

Squidward: Well I wouldn't say friends...

Spongebob: Squidward's a great friend, right guys (Everyone shrugs) Well I think he is

Squilliam: Squidward, do you know how many friends I have?

Squidward: Probably about three thousand

Squilliam: I mean real friends...Zero is the answer (Everyone gasps)

Squidward: What are you talking about? You hang out with loads of people

Squilliam: They're not my real friends, they're just around me for my money

Squidward: Can't say I blame 'em

Squilliam: I guess the reason that I don't have many friends...

Squidward: ...Is because you're a horrible, manipulative...

Squilliam: Exactly...

Squidward: Let me finishes, Cruel, unpleasant...

Squilliam: I only pick on people to make myself feel better but no one is truly my friend

Squidward: Well maybe if you treated people a little better, then maybe you'd have real friends...

Mr Krabs: Yeah, yeah, yeah could we hurry this along? I need to get back before the safety inspector arrives (Scene cuts to the completely clean Krusty Krab as the inspector looks around)

Safety inspector: Amazing, everything is so...clean (He walks up to Mr Krabs) Thank you for letting me inspect such a fine establishment

Mr Krabs: Don't thank me, Thank Sandy's wonderful invention

Safety inspector: Hey buddy, I can't just go giving out my thank you's willy nilly to random folk, sheesh (He walks out angrily)

Squilliam: (He and Squidward are sitting on a table in the Krusty Krab) So Squidward, could you teach me to be nice like you

Squidward: I don't think I'll be the best teacher but I'll try

Squilliam: Thanks...Friend (He smiles at him)

Squidward: Now, who feels like a party?

Squilliam: Sure, what the hell? (He opens the door and all the teenagers burst in and start partying)

Mr Krabs: Hey, get out of here (He walks up to Squidward) You hate parties, why do you suddenly want one in here

Squidward: Hey a party is a party...and it not being in my house is a plus (He laughs as Mr Krab runs around frantically stopping the teenagers from breaking everything)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ggy5b86gHM&feature=relmfu

Kc & The Sunshine Band - "Get Down Tonight"

[Jjs Goodman]

I can't believe it's been so long since someone posted here..

8. The Mystery of the Jewel Thief

We see the 4 troopers at Nathan's home.

"Sweeties, please don't make me bust you out of jail again." Nathan's mom said.

"YES, MRS. NATHAN!" ACS said.

We then heard the news come on.

"BREAKING NEWS! Last night at around 9:45 PM, a museum robbery occurred! A sacred jewel was stolen, and police are investigating," the reporter said.

"Troopers, time to investigate!" Nathan said, as they stormed out of the house to the museum.

"I got my eye on them, I don't want Nathan-buns going to jail again!" His mom said, worried. She got in her car and followed the boys secretly.

The gang was at the museum.

"THE GEM IS GONE!" ACS exclaimed, referring to an empty and shattered glass case.

"Well, no shit Sherlock Homes 2: A Game of Shadows," Woahwoah said.

"WHAT?!" ACS yelled.

"Guys, cool it. Now let's see, it seems like it was smashed with a hammer," Nathan said, investigating.

"a hummer!" sponge_bob said.

"A cummer!" Nathan joked.

"HMM, WHAT IS THIS?! SOMEONE DROPPED A PIECE OF PAPER!" ACS yelled, reading it.

"Thanks kid, but leave this to the professionals," the cop said.

"WHAT DOES THE PAPER SAY?!" ACS asked.

"Calm down, and it mentions meeting someone, but it's our situation, not yours, so stay out of it," the cop said.

"FINE!" ACS said, as they left the museum.

"Why did we give up?" Woahwoah asked.

"I DON'T KNOW, BUT WE'LL GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS!" ACS yelled.

Nathan's mom drove by.

"Boys, you better not get arrested again!" She warned.

"I won't mommy!" Nathan said.

She then gave Nathan and friends lollipops.

"momma!" sponge_bob said.

"No problem sweeties!"

After they finished their lollipops, they thought of a plan.

"ALRIGHT! HOW WILL WE CATCH THE CROOK?!" ACS pondered.

"We set a trap, Scooby-Doo style!" Woahwoah said.

At night, the gang had set a trap up.

"Now we need to set the bait," Nathan said.

"Here, I'll use my leftover lollipop, and pretend it is a ruby with its red color," Woahwoah said, putting it in place.

"Now we wait for the crook to strike!" Nathan said.

Sponge_bob then ate the lollipop, and got caught in the trap.

"DAMMIT SPONGE_BOB!" ACS yelled.

"heheh!" sponge_bob said, hanging from the rope.

We then saw the crook hiding against the wall.

"Call me Adam Sandler, but I see a criminal on the loose!" Woahwoah said. "And AS is the best actor ever!"

The criminal ran, and the gang trampled him.

They unmasked him.

"AH HA! WE CAUGHT YOU!!!" ACS yelled.

"You're...?" Nathan asked.

"I'm Captain52, famed troll from TV.com," Captain said.

"Why did you rob the museum?" Nathan asked.

"I'm broke bitches, and I need some moolah from this gem!" Captain said, pulling it out.

"Another successful case solved by the Noob Troop!" Woahwoah said.

Just then, the cops arrived.

"You're all under arrest! Freeze punks!" They yelled.

"But you don't understand, we didn't rob-" Nathan was cut off, and the 3 were arrested.

"again??" sponge_bob asked.

"Thanks cops for arresting these cruel criminals," Captain smirked, and ran away with the gem.

And so, the Noob Troop went to jail...again.

[TJ]

23 "Uncle ScAM"

(Tom, Lou, Evelyn, and Scooter are visiting Uncle Max)

Evelyn: I can not take your nephew's crap any longer!

Uncle Max: Listen, my mansion is a place to chill. Not to be distraught!

Tom: When did you get a mansion uncle?

Lou: Good question.

(The doorbell rings)

Scooter: I'll get it ha ha ha!

Uncle Max: He's still stupid?

Evelyn: Yea...

(Scooter answers it.)

Evelyn: Jennifer Tinsley!!!

Jennifer Tinsley: You didn't tell me you had company Maxwell ^^ .

Uncle Max: Then lets take this upstairs.. shall we?

(They leave.)

Tom: Jennifer Tinsley the News Reporter? My uncle bagged her

for a reason...

Scooter and Lou: Cause she's HOT?!

(Evelyn respectfully slaps them both in the back of the head.)

-----------

Uncle Max: Lets take things to the next level Jennifer.

Jennifer: What?

Uncle Max (Takes out a ring)

Jennifer: OH MY! Yes I'll marry you!!

Uncle Max: You should probably give me your bank account password so I can

set up the wedding.

Jennifer: Okay..

-----------

(Two days later)

(There's a knock at Tom and Lou's apartment door in Radell)

Tom: Jennifer Tinsley?

Jennifer: I am the biggest loser in Radell!

Lou: What's wrong? (sits her down).

Jennifer: Maxwell stole all the money in my bank account!!!

(cries nonstop.)

Tom: SHUT UP!

Jennifer: Ok.

Tom: I knew he was doing...I mean dating you for a reason.

Jennifer: Cause I'm HOT?!

(Lou respectfully slaps her in the back of the head.)

Jennifer: OUCH!

Tom: Obviously he was after your money, not your lips. He's too old

for the touching of lips. Eww.

Jennifer: So can you HELP me?

Tom: I can!

-----------------

(Tom, Lou, Evelyn, and Jennifer break into Uncle Max's buisness office

in black ninja outfits.)

Tom: His laptop is his world! You'll find everything on it.

(Tom starts sending all the money from Uncle Max's account, to

Jennifer's)

Uncle Max: (Walks in and turns on the light.) My own nephew!

Tom: That's right uncle! You scammed Jennifer, now you have to pay for

it.

Jennifer: YUUP Maxwack! The transaction went through! HE HEEE HEEEEEE!

HA HAAAAAA.

Uncle Max: Your a big 'ol friut loop aren'tcha?

----------------

(The next day at Uncle Max house.)

Scooter: How about some newz?

--------

Jennifer Tinsley: AND TODAYYYY! A skeezy scammer named Maxwell Powell has been givin COMMUNITY SERVICE for BANK ACCOUNT SCAM. OH YEAH OH YEAH OH YEAA. (Dances like an underwater chimp)

David Hickings: Excuse my co host. She's not herself today.Appearantley she's a wild chimp.

--------

(Uncle max turns off the TV.)

Uncle Max: (Waoking away) Crazy broad stole all my money..ghgg hhm gghh jjjj.

(Tom, Lou, Evelyn, and Scooter all just look.)

[TJ]

Ep.24 "Tales of A High School Dropout"

(Tom, Lou, and Evelyn visit Scooter at his new job is Radell, The One Stop Shop. A Shop selling Goth Merchandise.)

Scooter: GUYS, STOP laughing, I'm serious.

Evelyn: Its just that ..(laughing)

Tom: We can't believe you..(laughing) work here.

Lou: okay, okay. We all gotta do what we gotta do to make money

Scooter: Thank you Lou ^^. (Goes back behind register)

--------

(While hanging outside the store, Tom comes up with an idea.)

Lou: That's CRAZY. Dress in a woman's clothes and fake like your stealing from the store?

Tom: I want to see what Scooter Would do.

Evelyn: That's mean.

Tom: Whatever (runs off)

--------

(Tom walks in the store disguised as a woman.)

Scooter: Can I help you?

Tom: (In high pitched voice) NOPE (Grabs dress and runs)

(Scooter chases Tom all around the store, knocking over everything. Tom drops the dress and hurries out the store.)

Manager: Wha-

Scooter: There was a robber!

Manager: My store...

Scooter: Sir..

Manager: YOUR FIRED.

----------

(We see Scooter laying in the back seat of The Black Horror. Tom, Lou, and Evelyn arrive.)

The Black Horror: Oh goodness! Your all here! Now get this moron out of my seat!

(Scooter gets out. The Black Horror rides off)

Tom: I'm really sorry about that mean trick I played on you.

Scooter: I can't forgive you

Tom: You'll find another job!

Scooter: NO! Tom, no. That was the only job that would take me. That's why I've been traveling around the sea all

summe. Everywhere I went, no one would take me!

Evelyn: Why? (Looks sad)

Scooter: Because I'm a dropout.

(Silence ensues)

Lou: Oh my goodness, your a dropout?

Scooter: Never got my GED.

Tom: Then there's only one thing to do.

Evelyn: Here it comes (sighs)

Lou: Oh no.

Tom: We've got to get you a GED!

------

(Scooter signs up for a GED Taking class.)

???: I'm Mr.Rowlfield, your one day stand teacher.

Scooter: (giggles).

--------

(The Next Day)

Scooter: (sees his friends hanging in the shade by an oak tree at the Radell Community Park) I failed my GED (cries)

The Black Horror: Big whoop (rides off).

Lou: He's been doing that a lot lately...

Tom: Scooter thats horrible!

Evelyn: And fixable.

Scooter and Tom: ?

--------------

(The following week, Scooter gets a new letter, saying he passed with flying colors.)

Scooter: I PASSED, I PASSED, Lo hicimos, I PASSED!

Tom: First, Scooter didn't know what to do

Evelyn: When he was was fired out of the blue.

Lou: But, now he passed the TESSSTTT

The Black Horror Even though he's always been a Peeeestttt

Scooter: I did it, I DID IT!

Lou: Wait....Evelyn, what'd ou do?

Evelyn: Seduction.

(Evelyn gets bugged open eyes from everyone)

Episode ends.

[box]

I'll rerun Episode 4 of RFBB.

-------------------------------------------------====================------------------------------------

S1, E4: "Colossi In New Kelp"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We see the Krusty Krab crew after the Krabby Fest, now trashed. The only other

people to remain are Danny and Betty.

SPONGEBOB: Wow! What a rush, huh guys?"

MR. KRABS: Yep, me lad. It's, just, *sniffs* me pride and joy falls to a depression!"

MR. KRABS then sobs over the loss of his restaurant.

DANNY: Don't worry, Eugene. I'm sure the common cult following will revive it somehow."

Whether it be a small shack or giant skyscraper, something will happen.

SQUIDWARD: If this is supposed to be sad, then you lost me."

EUGENE: Squidward! Thanks, Danny. I'm sure something will happen. I have nothing to feed my whale,

no money to fix the - wait, NO MONEY!"

SQUIDWARD: Mr. Krabs, is there nothing but money to think of?"

SPONGEBOB: By the way, Squidward, did you get the concert tickets?"

SQUIDWARD sighs. "Well, i did. Now don't go jumping about it."

SPONGEBOB: Thanks, Squidward!"

SQUIDWARD: "You're unwelcome."

MR. KRABS: "Well boys, go home. I'm sure something will turn up in a few days, what with this

fast job market. I'm going to loot some groceries to feed Pearl."

SPONGEBOB: " All right, Mr. Krabs. See you *sobs* around! Squidward, we'll go to New Kelp tomorrow."

SQUIDWARD: " Fine. I have nothing to do."

SPONGEBOB and SQUIDWARD walked away, leaving the Krusty Krab in the dust.

-------------------================================================================--------------

After this, the organization Colossi, obviously named after the demon god, after a good night's

sleep and some breakfast, went out and once more summoned Colossi.

DR. STURGEON: "Come, Colossi!"

Colossi flew out of the ever glowing stone, waiting for a command.

DR. STURGEON: "Listen. I order you to destroy New Kelp Theater tonight. If those fools

in the county won't listen for other businesses, they'll certainly listen to this one. *laughs*

"Now, return and wait until 8:30 PM exactly! Destroy the theater and return!"

Colossi seemed to have abided to this rule, as soon after he returned to the stone.

GEORGE: "Good, Mortimer, but listen. We can't do this one difficult task with four people alone.

We need another member, and fast."

PLANKTON: "He's right. From the brief time in kindergarten, i remember that teamwork, *spits*

teamwork got things done quick."

MARTHA: "I agree with Plankton's *spits* response. Even if team - *spits* work IS disgusting, it might

get this job done quicker and easier."

DR. STURGEON: "You all are quite right. I'll have to look into finding a new member soon. We'll have to

stay low, considering our circumstances. For the mean time, Colossi will destroy the theater and we'll

have a good start. I stayed up quite late last night, and i found this crucial bit in the Vitale. Here's the

legend."

The voice changes to NEPTUNE.

"Those four stones were based on the four elements of earth - fire, water, earth, and air. I sealed them

in four shrines in the Pacific, Atlantic, Indian, and Arctic oceans. They were protected with pristine

care and are currently guarded by large guardians known as the Order. I created them specifically for

this matter. One who gains all four stones and is deemed worthy by the Order can lock up the

Demon God Colossi if he be released. If thou god is released, he may bring potential apocalypse, and i

am worried about that if he is released. If Colossi is released, i will retreat with my soliders to the

forgotten kingdom of Ritirarsi. I hope this shan't happen. I have held the stone in Oceano

so people may have been unlead to the truth and be stopped in their search of finding Colossi."

DR. STURGEON: "This information will help us. I've planned out the entire mission -

First, excavate the deserted ruins of Oceano after finding out information from the Vitale.

Second, find Colossi and order him to destroy buildings of the area until the Pacific notices.

Third, find the Order and corrupt them to destroy anyone who reaches the shrines.

Fourth, siege Neptune's Castle.

Fifth, destroy any potential blockades.

Sixth, destroy Neptune and family.

Seventh, take the world as our own.

Not fool-proof, but i am sure this will work - we will wait until tonight for further information."

Colossi leaves the shrine, in hopes they will be noticed.

[Old Man Jenkins]

In honor of April Fools Day

Episode 19. I Pity The Fools In April/Neptune's Dildo

One day, it was April's Fool Day in Bikini Bottom and Spongebob was pulling juvenile pranks up the yin yang. Everybody in town soon grew tired of his bad jokes. After Spongebob fools Skodwarde by offering free deals on AOL, Skodwarde decided to stir shit up. He used his god powers to construct an elaborate death trap for the playful sponge. Spongebob gets swung around the Krusty Krab before being turned into a sausage of all things. Everybody cheered Skodwarde on as Spongebob ran off in humiliation. Skodwarde didn't appreciated this, so he swung all of them around the Krusty Krab before turning them into sausages of all things. Skodwarde was then greeted by the celestial spirit of his mother, who gave him a congratulatory spanking before telling him, "you stink!" Spongebob spent the rest of his day watching more amoebe porn.

One day, Spongebob and Patrick visited a museum where they laid eyes on Neptune's golden dildo, which was lodged in a butt-shaped rock. Spongebob went to strike a pose next to it but unintentionally pulled it out of the butthole. Skodwarde, who was checking out the Holocaust exhibit, neared witness to the event as King Neptune blasted onto the scene using his god powers. Neptune Compared penis sizes with Larry the Lobster before demanding who found his dildo. Everybody points to Spongebob and Neptune just laughs it off before comparing penis sizes with Larry again. Patrick interrupted their convo to tell him about Spongebob but Neptune used his god powers to make Patrick talk out of his ass because all Neptune was hearing was bullshit. Neptune then challenged Spongebob to a salad tossing competition. Skodwarde and Mr. Krabs betted all their money on Neptune while Patrick told Spongebob that he'll eat lightning and crap thunder. Neptune used his god powers to toss that salad while Spongebob tossed one. Everybody was disgusted by Neptune's methods so Spongebob was declared the unimous victor. After losing his bet, Skodwarde challenged Neptune to a clash of the titans. Neptune wasn't interest until Skodwarde used his god powers to reveal that Neptune had no penis. Neptune fought Skodwarde with his Roman Lazor Beams while Skodwarde fired back with his pew pew eye lazors. Neptune released the Kraken and there were a lot of casualties. Skodwarde used his ultimate technique, Ultima, to wipe out the arena and Neptune's hair. Neptune made a hasty retreat while Skodwarde basked in his suremacist glory. Skodwarde then went home to watch the remake of Clash of the Titans but was disappoint.

[TJ]

Ep.12"Big Momma's Bank"

(Tom and Lou were now in the town of Staten. Which happened to be the place Lou's mom was living).

Momma Lou: So how many more days you boys in town?

Lou: Like, 5 more ma.

Tom: But.. We might leave early..

Momma: Why?

Tom: Personal reasons..

Momma: Well, I'm a go get some groceries. (Leaves house)

Tom: YOUR MOM HAS BEEN HERE EVERYDAY FOR THE PAST 2 WEEKS we've been here!

Lou: I know she's been annoying..

Tom: Alleviating!!!

Lou: How about we go out to the lake and fish a little.

Tom: YES. The best suggestion I've heard all day.

------------------------------------------------------------------

(Tom and Lou come back from of fishing two hours later).

Lou: MOM what'd you do to the house? Its all pink!

Momma: Boy, hush up. Embrace yo feminine side.

Lou: Mother-

Momma: DON'T YOU SAY IT!

Lou: I was just saying Mother!

----------------------------------------------------------------

(12:00 at night, Tom and Lou smell something burning).

Lou: What is..(sees his mother throwing money into the fireplace) MOOOOM!

Tom: Momma Lou, why???

Momma: Well I was going to make you a newspaper!

Lou: Why?

Momma: You boys need the classics in your life!

Tom: Aww.. you used up ALL our money for the rode.

Momma: I'm sorry boys, I'll give you 10g out of my saving's account.

Lou: I don't-

Momma: Louy, be quiet!

Tom: Ha ha, Louy!

Lou: Shut up Thomas!

Tom: Lou, now that's cold!

----------------------------------------------------------------

(Tom, Lou, and Momma Lou arrive at the bank )

Momma: I would like to take out 10grand.

Worker: Here you go Ms. Corelli

(As Lou, Momma Lou, and Tom are walking out, three men with guns enter the bank).

Robber #1: Everyone GET DOWN.

Momma: NO!

Lou: Momma just get down.

Momma: NO

Robber #1: Get down!

Lou: Momma GET DOWN!

Momma: NO! I will never go down for any man!

Lou: Momma, (cries) PLLLLEEEAASSSEE!!!!!

(Momma Lou flips over to Robber #1 and kicks gun out of his hand and then trips him with her fat legs. The other me shoot at her, but miss. Momma Lou tackles Robber #2)

Momma: Meoow! (Licks his face. Grabs his gun and shoots robber #3 before he can say quicksaw!) YEA!!! I'm the shi-

Police Man: FREEZE...riiight there. Are you the robber Ms.?

Momma Lou: No, I..

Tom and Lou: YES, YES, YES SHE IS SHE TOOK THE WHOLE-

Police Man: OKAY! (Cuffs Momma Lou and walks out with her).

Momma: Lou, please tell him the truuuuuuuth!

Tom and Lou: (Dancing) Oh Yea, Oh yea, Oh yea, Oh yea, Oh yeah (Robbers get back up)

Robber #1: Okay, everyone down again.

Tom and Lou: (Cry) Aw man, Aw man, Aw man, Aw man, Aw man.

[TJ]

Ep.13 "Taking Seconds"

(Tom and Lou pull in to Eels Fast Food Place)

Lou: Are you clear on the order? Two steaming jellyfish, two kelp shakes, and two seaweed fries.

Tom: Okay (Tom gets out car).

The Black Horror: And nothing for maw?

Tom: You're a car.. You don't eat.

The Black Horror: Such a stereotype!

Tom: Fine, fine, I'll get you some oil from the gas station. Will that you feel better?

The Black Horror: ....(Quietly) It might...

-------------------------

10 Min Later

Lou: Man, where's Tom with that food?

The Black Horror: Yes. I'm tired of being here. Gum's stuck to my tire!

???: Would you like to buy some cookies?

Lou: (Rolls down window) Cookies? Nope..

???: Listen bub, I need to sell 20 cookies to get a really important badge.

Lou: What are you, a camp girl?

???: Your looking at Stacy Millers, the leader of the Scout Troup Girls of Bikini Bottom.

Lou: Well.. this isn't bikini bottom.

Stacy: Well duuuh. Me and my team have gone national!

Lou: I DON'T WANT COOKIES

Stacy: Meeeooww aggressive. (Leaves)

----------------------------------------------------

Another 10 min past

Lou: Where is Tom, I am starving!

(Window cleaner man starts cleaning the windows of the Black Horror)

The Black Horror: Hey, Hey, stop it!

Window cleaner: Just doing my job..

The Black Horror: (Pulls out razor) STOOOOPP!

Window cleaner: AHHH. Crazy car! (Throws water can at tail light)

(The Black Horror's sirens start)

Lou: Aw man!!!

-------------------

15 Minutes Later

(A police woman knocks on window, awaking a sleeping Lou).

Police Woman: You earned yourself a ticket. Your car can only be here a max of over 20

Minutes

Lou: THAT'S IT! Watch my car police LADY!

(Lou runs inside and sees Tom sitting down talking to a hot girl).

Lou: TOOOMMM!!!!

Tom: Finally you're here. Now we can order.

Lou: (Falls out).

[TJ]

GET READY!

BECAUSE APRIL 13TH, 2012, TEAM SPONGEBOB RETURNS!

"WHY ARE WE JUST SITTING AROUND? We should be looking for Linda!" SpongeBob yelled at his teammates.

------

"Its you.." SpongeBob said, using his super speed to kick The Shocker back.

"Heh heh, yah know, your going to have do much better than that if you want to live!" The Shocker said creating a huge bolt and blasting it.

AS TEAM SPONGEBOB FACES THEIR HUGEST THREAT....

THE ISLAND ITSELF

"Team SpongeBob are now enemies of the state. Anyone found assisting them in any way, will be liberated to fullest extent of the law. If you report a sighting or catch them yourselves...you'll never have to worry about making money ever again." the Queen announced to her citizens.

NEW DANGER RISES, AS A REVELATION OF A CONSPIRACY LOOMS THE ISLAND

"GUYS!" SpongeBob cheered, seeing Shin, Pearl, Patrick, and Sandy running into the battlefield.

----------

"SANDY!" Patrick, SpongeBob, and Pearl screamed, untying her.

TEAM SPONGEBOB - Season 6:

Age Of The Airborne Disease,

Continues April 13th, 2012

[ClassicNickelodeon Fan 1]

I shall re-run SpongeBob and His Friends Episode 1(Don' forget to watch new episodes Every Saturday! )

SpongeBob and His Friends

Episode 1: A Suspenseful Tale

Narrator: One Beautiful Day In Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob and Squidward were at their jobs, as usual, but today, something unbelievable was about to happen.

SpongeBob: Ah, what a beautiful day, isn’t it Squidward

Squidward: Whatever

(Boys here Gun Shot)

Both: What the?

SpongeBob: I think it came from Mr. Krab’s office!

(The Boys run in to see Mr. Krabs completely knocked out on the floor)

Squidward: Oh My God. SpongeBob, call 911 NOW!

(SpongeBob runs to the phone and calls 911 )

Squidward: This has got to be the most horrible thing that has happened to me.

(Cue to Patrick’s house)

Patrick: Yawn. Ah, time to get up.

(Patrick walks outside in his robe to see 5 ambulances heading to the Krusty Krab)

Patrick: Hmm, something isn’t right here. Oh well.

(Patrick heads to store to buy food)

Cashier: That will be one dollar, sir.

Patrick: Hmm, I’ve got nothing.

(Patrick gets kicked out of store)

Patrick: I need a job

(Cues to hospital)

SpongeBob: Docter!, Docter! Will Mr. Krabs be all right?

Doctor Jim: He should be fine. Nurse, let’s get him to a room, stat!

Nurse Sandy: Right Away Sir!

SpongeBob: I didn’t know Sandy worked as a Nurse?

(Cues to Hospital Room)

Doctor Jim: Oh God, we’re losing him!

Squidward: This can’t be happening!!!!

SpongeBob: SOB!

(Beep Beep Beep Errrrrrrrr)

Doctor Jim: Oh No.

Squidward: Is he…?

FADE TO BLACK

[TJ]

Team SpongeBob - Season 6: Age Of The Airborne Disease

Ep.85/86 "Secrets Of Karate Island"

Ep.85 "Terrors"

11:00 AM December 31st, 2012

SpongeBob was ready to be prepped for the Queen's New Years Eve Social Party at The Conference House, Karate Island. He was in a towel having just stepped out the shower. He talked amongst his friends in the White Tower living room lounge.

"Why are you the only one that gets to go?" Linda asked. "The Queen just wants one represenive from our team. Preferably, the leader." SpongeBob explained. "When DID we ever state you were our leader?" Patrick asked. "Yea! Just like we never voted in the name 'Team SpongeBob'! " Sandy stated.

"Guys.." SpngeBob started. "I'm leaving." Pearl said getting off the conch. "Where?" Shin asked. "Ouut" Pearl said leaving.

11:30 AM December 31st, 2012

Pearl gazed around the mainland of Karate Island. The capital, where the White Queen, Cassandra lives.

From the corner of her eye, she saw a distressed crowd shouting at a man on top of the local church. He had on a black outfit with red water shooters, only instead of water, came out spray graffiti!

"Pressurized Air.." Pearl thought.

The crowd screamed as the graffiti spray cracked ground. Pearl got on top of the roof and shot arrows at him. His spray was powerful enough to com-bust her arrows.

He jumped off the roof, into an alley way. She shot several arrows which exploded trash cans. Making gas cover the mysterious "artist", allowing him to get away.

Pearl jumped down into the alley and saw a strange graffiti art he put on the wall.

It read:

ΣΥΝΩΜΟΣΙΑ

Pearl took a picture of it.

She called in the team. They met her in the alley.

"SpongeBob-"

"Is getting ready for the social." Shin reminded Pearl.

"This graffiti.." Linda said.

"Know what it means?" Pearl asked.

"N-o. Shin?"

"Not me. Pat?"

"Nah."

"Why even ask him?!" Pearl said.

"Hey!" Patrick said, offended.

"I'll search up this word's..(if it is that)...meaning and you guys find the criminal." Linda said. With that, Pearl and the boys, Shin and Pat, all took off.

12:00 PM December 31st, 2012

The three looked around and found the mysterious painter, spraying a group of police men out of his way. Pearl shot an arrow at the machinery on him, that produced his spray paint. He quickly pushed himself out of the way.

Shin launched down white magic down on him, but he avoided it. Patrick attacked him with huge boulders. He sprayed the ground beneath him to lift him up and over the rocks. He then sprayed Pat's eyes. "Ahhhh" Patrick cried. "PAT!" Shin and Pearl screamed.

Linda arrived. "IT MEANS CONSPIRACY.." she shouted. "In Greek.." she ended, finally caught up to Shin and Pearl.

The spray painter blasted onto a roof, leaving a trail of red paint spray. "I GOT HIM. You two heal Patrick." Pearl shouted.

She climbed onto the roof by latter.

"Who..Are you?" Pearl asked tensed.

"Call me Pintar." he said.

"Why.."

"I don't want to willingly hurt the citizens of the Mainland. I want to scare them away. So, I am terrorizing them." Pintar revealed.

"That's CRAZY! Why do they need to be scared away?" Pearl asked.

"A conspiracy is going on. I spelled it in Greek so the officials wouldn't know anyone is on to them. I hoped some smart soul would figure it out. Looks that's you!" He blushed.

"Not me. My friend." Pearl said.

Shin came up.

"Shin!" Pearl said surprised. Several bombs launched to the roof. Shin transported Pearl and himself away.

"NO! Pintar!" Pearl yelled.

"I-m..sorry?" Shin asked.

"He was going to finish telling me about the conspiracy!" Pearl said.

"What conspiracy?" Shin and Linda asked.

"Now we'll never know.." Pearl said.

"Hmm.." Shin said thinking.

"Pat..are your eyes okay?" Linda asked.

"I..can't see.." Patrick cried.

Hours later, January 1st, 2013 12:00 AM.

Shin called SpongeBob on his communicator.

They both had a lot to tell each other.

[TJ]

Ep.27 "Evelyn and Lou Run A Girl's Scout"

(Evelyn got a shocking phone call from Radell Central Hospital.)

Evelyn: OMG! Is Tom alright?

Lou: Besides a lot 3rd Degree Burns, yea!

Evelyn: WHAT happened?

Lou: We were playing with Ancient Atlantis Fireworks, when one went off course and was going to hit a small cookie baking factory, so Tom went to warn anyone in there, but no one was there and then CABLAMO!

Evelyn: Wait, why were you guys playing with Atlantis Fireworks?

Lou: Because they're ANCIENT!

Evelyn: UGH, (Plucks Lou).

Lou: HEY!

(Evelyn goes in Tom's hospital room.)

Evelyn: Tom..are you okay..?

Tom: I-..I'-m go..od (puts a thumb up.)

Evelyn: Your not good! Your in VERY bad condition!

(Lou pulls Evelyn into the hallway.)

Lou: I need a little help here!

(Evelyn sees a group of little girls in scout uniforms.)

Evelyn: Aww, what cute little girrrls!

(The girls growl.)

Evelyn: (Backs up) OKAY! (Whispers) Little nasties.

Lou: They're sueing me!

Evelyn: What?

Stacy: As the leader, I'll explain. That factory was OURS. Now we have to make the cookies in my tour bus kitchen! We WILL call the cops. Unless...

Evelyn: Unless..?

Lou: Well?

Stacy: You two have to help us with our girl scout, as our grown up leader is out of town for a week!

Evelyn:Yes

Lou: No

Evelyn: LOU

Lou: EVELYN

Evelyn: They are gonna call the cops. We have no choice, Lou.

-----------------

(Evelyn and Lou drive Stacy and two of the scout girls in The Black Horror.)

Evelyn: STACY!

Stacy: WHAT?

Evelyn: These aren't directions to your house. They are to Shark Fin City!

Lou: ARE YOU GIRLS CRAZY!?! We are NOT going to the most dangerouse place in the entire sea!

Stacy: BUT...our abandoned factory is there!

Evelyn: Its not a WONDER ITS ABANDONED!

Trisha: she has a point.

Stacy: SHUT UP CHUBBY!

Rosa: Your being mean.

Lou: And suicidal..

Stacy: I am GOING to call THE POPO'S.

Evelyn: FINE!

Lou: NO!

Evelyn: LOU!

Lou: EVELYN!

Evelyn: UGHHH-

The Black Horror: SHUT UP. EVERYONE SHUT IT! We ARE going to Shark Fin City, so I don't have to hear anymore of this BULL.

Everyone: (quietly and timid) Okay..

(With that, they kept driving onto the the factory.)

--------------

Lou: (shivers) The town is so dark..and creepy.

Stacy: ..Yea, maybe this was a bad idea..

Evelyn: Now you say that Stacy?

(A group of sharks hover around them.)

Shark #1: So what do we have here?

The Black Horror: Poor and defensless fish?...and a..talking...car...

Shark #2: Exactly what we like!

Evelyn: Black Horror......DRIVEEE!!!

(A high speed chase erupts)

(One shark bites the BH's trunk. Another, the door. The girls in the backseat scoot over.)

Scout Troop Girls: AHHHHHHHHHHH

Lou: (Turns around) REMAIN CALM!

(The Black Horror makes it through driven by Evelyn).

Evelyn: (Steps out the car) Well..we made i-....Wait..where is it? The factory, the directions say its here...

Lou: ...girls..?

Stacy: Ohhh..you know what..I forgot...

Trisha & Rosa: FOGOT WHAT?

Stacy: Trisha...Rosa!

The Black Horror: (Takes out large spinning knife) Talk child...

Stacy: Yea, the sharks tore this down years ago. That'sss why..we relocated.

Evelyn: So..

Stacey: ...

The Black Horror: i got scratched and bit up..

Evelyn: ..We put our lifes in danger....

Lou: ALL FOR NOTHING?

Stacy: For the sake of A good adventure? HAHAHAhahahah- .

(Everyone has droven away in TBH. Leaving Stacy all alone. )

Stacy: Guys?, guys?, GUYS? Anyone here?!?

(10 sharks surround her.)

Stacy: Oh boy.

[Old Man Jenkins]

A group of nazis get tickets to The Skodwarde Movie from an original copy of Hitler’s diary entitled Mein Kampf. The nazis then sing the "Skodwarde Theme Song", enter a movie theater, exterminated everyone else in the movie theater, and sit down to watch the movie.

Paramount Pictures and The SpongeBob Community Presents:

THE SKODWARDE MOVIE

Starring: A bunch of voice actors and cameos from people who shouldn't be able to breathe underwater

Written by: OMJ, Clappy, and Wumbo

Directed by: The corpse of Ed Wood

The movie properly begins with an emergency situation at the Krusty Krab, complete with police helicopters and news reporters. Suddenly, Skodwarde, "the manager", arrives in a BMW. Mr. Krabs says that it started with a simple order, a Krabby Patty with cheese. "When the customer took a bite, NO CHEESE!" Mr. Krabs starts crying, leading to Skodwarde roundhouse kicking him. Skodwarde says leave it to him and enters the Krusty Krab and meets Tommy Chong (appearing as himself). Skodwarde then opens his suitcase, takes out a blunt, and tells Tommy Chong to smoke the weed and then try eating the krabby patty. The day is saved, and the crowd starts cheering for Skodwarde. Their cheering soon turned to everyone taking turns jacking off Skodwarde. Suddenly things started feeling sticky as Skodwarde woke up to himself feeling wet. Thus, revealing the opening scene to be a nocturnal emission or a wet dream depending on your interpretation of the word.

Skodwarde is extremely pissed, as today is the grand opening of "The Krusty Krab 2", and he's gonna probably be named the new manager and prepares himself for the day. Skodwarde proceeds to take a shower. As he washes himself, he suddenly starts to feel something long and hard go up his ass. It’s rather pleasing as he continues to scrub himself. Suddenly, he felt someone else washing himself as he turns around to see SpongeBob scrubbing him and wearing his new dildo. Skodwarde asks him what the hell he’s doing here as SpongeBob said that his message couldn’t wait until work since there is no shower there. SpongeBob then tells Skodwarde that he is going to be named the new manager and that he will mention Skodwarde in his acceptance speech. Skodwarde kicks SpongeBob out of his house as he proceeds to finish his morning routine while listening to SpongeBob and Patrick sing an infernal song about Goofy Goobers.

Plankton envies Mr. Krabs, and states he tried every plan in his cabinet from "A to Y". There are actually 26 letters of the alphabet, and Plankton doesn't notice it at first, but Karen, his computer wife, tells him. Plankton finds "Plan Z" in the back of the drawer. He masturbates to the plan and thinks it's his best plan yet. He goes outside, only to be stepped on by SpongeBob. He pulls Plankton off his shoe, and asks him if he's going to the 'grand opening ceremony.' Plankton replies, "No I am going to file a hate crime and then continue PLANNING TO RULE THE WORLD!!!! Ha, Ha, Ha!" SpongeBob doesn't understand what a hate crime is, wishes Plankton luck, then runs off again.

Meanwhile, Mr. Krabs is preparing the grand opening ceremony of the Krusty Krab 2, which is an exact replica of the original and is located directly next-door to it, the only difference being a giant glowing "2" sign. SpongeBob rushes up to the stage to accept his promotion, but Mr. Krabs announces that Skodwarde is the new manager instead, much to SpongeBob's shock. Mr. Krabs tells a heartbroken SpongeBob that he is too immature and childlike to handle the task, and SpongeBob sulks away, saying "I'm ready...depression." Patrick suddenly flies by, naked, with SpongeBob’s dildo in his butt, and crashes into the set, causing a fire.

Meanwhile, Plankton flies towards King Neptune's castle, as part of "Plan Z". Inside, Neptune is attempting to punish his royal “scepter” polisher for touching his penis, but is stopped by his intelligent daughter, Scarlett Johansson (appearing as herself). The brutish and tyrannical king tries to explain to his daughter that he must enforce his power as king in order to be respected, and that she will have to do the same when she is Queen. He begins to explain the importance of his penis, and as he talks, Plankton arrives and steals it. Neptune, who is a merman and should have no penis, but does because it is the Skodwarde movie, is horrified to discover that his penis is missing.

Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Patrick are at Goofy Goober Ice Cream Party Boat brooding over his loss. Skodwarde comes in and tells them that ice cream won’t help. They end up going to the Salty Spitoon and have over a dozen shots. The three become hammer drunk from all the tequila in their systems, and everyone ends up falling asleep in the restaurant, experiencing hangover-like symptoms the morning afterwards.

Meanwhile, Neptune arrives at the Krusty Krab after receiving evidence planted by Plankton of Mr. Krabs stealing his penis, which is a note, saying, I stole your penis. Signed, Eugene Krabs. Krabs denies stealing the penis, but a message then plays on the phone of a man thanking Mr. Krabs for giving him the penis and saying that he sold it to Shell City. This call is actually from Plankton. Neptune gets REALLY angry and plans to burn Mr. Krabs to a crisp and peel off his legs to eat the insides. But before doing that, Neptune asks if anyone has anything to say to defend Mr. Krabs, and a drunken SpongeBob arrives and bad-mouths Mr. Krabs for not giving him the manager job, saying, "I've worked for Mr. Krabs for many years, and always thought he was a great boss. I now realize that he's a GREAT BIG JERK!! I DESERVE THAT MANAGER JOB, but you didn't give it to me, because you said I'm a KID! WELL, I AM 100 PERCENT MAN, AND THIS MAN HAS GOT SOMETHING TO SAY TO YOU! [blows Mr. Krabs’s long penis] There! I think I made my point!"

Neptune burns Krabs, but Krabs plunges into a barrel filled with water. Upon realizing the severity of the situation, SpongeBob sobers up and stops Neptune from killing him. Scarlett convinces her father to give SpongeBob a chance to prove Krab's innocence, and he, Skodwarde (who is forced to go after initially passing) and Patrick agree to travel to the dreaded Shell City, and return with the penis. Before departing, Mr. Krabs is frozen solid and Scarlett, who Patrick starts getting “hard” for, gives the group a magical bag of crystal meth to return home with.

Neptune gives our heroes a minimum of ten days to retrieve his lost penis, but Patrick, being the bargainer that he is, narrows their days down to six ala Shanghaied. He would've settled for much lower but Scarlett flashed him her boobs in order to get him to stop. Spongebob and Patrick introduces Skodwarde to the Oscar Meyer's Weinermobile (we do product placement) which is basically this long schlong-looking vehicle. Despite not being a licensed driver and is practically a terrible driver in general, Spongebob knows how to drive dick (and that's one of our money tongue in cheek innuendos for this movie). They take to the open road with "Highway to Hell" jamming in the background. Skodwarde finds this to be Hell, indeed. They pull up to a gas station on the country line where a couple of hillbillies make fun of our trio and their Weinermobile. The hillbillies tell Spongebob that they won't last 10 seconds pass the country line, to which Spongebob and Patrick respond by literally crossing over the line and begin playing with each other (interpretation). Skodwarde, on the other hand, really hits things up with the hillbillies due to their shared neo-nazi and they begin bonding over some Hillbilly Handfishing. Meanwhile, the Weinermobile gets stolen by some poor guy who's been affected the poor state of the economy, so much so that he's willing to jack a mobile penis in order to get a quick buck and a fuck. Spongebob and Patrick stop playing with each other and realize that the Weinermobile is gone but they're ecstatic at the fact that they lasted twelve seconds over the country line and they begin to shove it in those hicks' faces. Skodwarde bids farewell to fellow Klansmen as they continue their journey on foot.

After some nautical nonsense involving "KRUSTY KRAB PIZZA IS THE PIZZA ABSOTIVUH-LEEEEE!" and a pretty perverted game of "I Spy", our trio comes across the Weinermobile parked at a place called the "Push & Tug", which is basically The Salty Spittoon (or Suck & Blow, we've sorta lost canon on that) but for white supremacist sexual deviants. Spongebob has Patrick distract the thugs by working that pole like no one's business while he and Skodwarde retrieve the keys. The thugs are not amused by Patrick's homoerotic display due to the fact that he is pink, causing Spongebob to get his hands dirty in the process by going all Roadhouse on these neo-nazis by Roundhouse Kicking everyone as Skodwarde reads some more Mein Kampf and the Nazis in the theater audience cheer in approval. Spongebob and Patrick head to the bathroom to clean up where they come across the wonders of hand lotion and they proceed spot have some happy time (and in a public restroom, no less). Their sounds of ecstasy garners the attention of the Head Skinhead who, as the name suggests, is the leader of all the skinheads in the bar. He reminds everybody of the sacred rule of the club, "All Hand Lotion Babies Don't Deserve A Penis!" The Head Skinhead whips out a pair of hedge clippers in order to castrate the infidels and begins working that pole like no one's business to the tune of the Goofy Goober's theme song in order to draw out the slippery little buggers. Spongebob and Patrick must resist the urge to fap as Skodwarde is off flexing his buns and thighs (JAH BOONS UND TIES) to his fellow skinheads. Spongebob and Patrick are about to blow (ha) but are saved when the Siamese Twins (played by Matt Damon and Greg Kinnear respectively) beat each other off with some hand cream. The thugs begin beating the shit out of Jason Bourne and JFK as Skodwarde uses his god powers to swipe the key off the poor sap who was admiring his buns and thighs, revealing that that was his plan this entire scene. Spongebob proceeds to roundhouse kick their way out of the club and back to the sanctity of the Weinermobile, peeling off and burning rubber.

After what happened at the Push & Tug, Skodwarde states his displeasure for Spongebob and Patrick right to their faces over what has happened so far involving the Weinermobile and Push & Tug and he calls them a couple of pussies before teleporting back to Bikini Bottom to leave the duo to fend for themselves, caring less about what becomes of Mr. Krabs since he's a prick anyway. Meanwhile deep within the confines of my anus- wait a second, this isn't the chat box! Back in Bikini Bottom, with Krabs incapacitated, Plankton furthers his Plan Z by stealing the Krabby Patty secret formula. Since no one was there to shout out "Plankton no swiping" three times fast, the minuscule menace swiped it with ease before stupidly tossing it off-screen to be lost in the confines of background props. After some right clicking, Plankton retrieves the formula once again. He renames it the "Cum Pao Chicken" and it begins selling like hotcakes with sausage, booming up business for the Cum Bucket. He starts giving out free condoms to go with the meals, which is sending the wrong message to children but fuck, it's the Skodwarde Movie. Plankton is fully aware of Spongebob, Patrick and Skodwarde's journey to find Neptune's elusive penis so he gets some hired help from none other than Alec Baldwin, played by himself. Plankton tells him that had it been a few days ago, we would've just settled for any of the other Baldwin brothers since they're desperate for work and are cheaper to come by, but he now owns the best fast food chain in Bikini Bottom so he only settles for the best, which is why he's hiring Alec. Alec begins chastising Plankton for interrupting his game of Words With Friends with this phone call but is open to hearing what Plankton has to offer. Plankton offers him *pinky up* ONE MILLION DOLLARS and a chance to kill somebody who claims to be a god. This angers the most successful Baldwin Brother, who begins going on a tirade about the various violent, lewd, and inhumane things he'll do to Spongebob, Skodwarde and Patrick. He also takes time to tell Plankton his qualifications.

Alec Baldwin: I have an M.D. from Harvard, I am a board certified love doctor in cardio-thoracic medicine and trauma surgery, I have been awarded citations from seven different medical boards in New England, and I am never, ever sick at sea. So I ask you; when someone goes into that chapel and they fall on their knees and they pray to God that their wife doesn't sleep with another man or that their daughter doesn't bleed to death from her first period or that their mother doesn't suffer acute neural trama from a really mean orgasm, who do you think they're praying to? Now, go ahead and read your Bible, Sheldon, and you go to your church, and, with any luck, you might get lucky with that slut on the street corner, but if you're looking for God, he was in Studio 6A on November 17, and he doesn't like to be second guessed. You ask me if I have a God complex. Let me tell you something: I am God.

And with that, that guy from Beetlejuice goes on the manhunt for Skodwarde, Spongebob and Patrick. Skodwarde arrives back in a town a day later after some more Hillbilly Handfishing and he notices that everyone in town are all using Planton's Cum Condoms instead of the Best Condoms In Town or the Best Condoms Around. Some loose broad tells Skodwarde that Plankton is giving them away for free with the Cum Pao Chicken at the Cum Bucket. Skodwarde, sensing a disturbance in the force, goes to the Cum Bucket to investigate. Skodwarde uses his god powers to deduce that Plankton was behind the theft of King Neptune's penis in order to separate the Krusty Krew to get to the Secret Formula. After being cursed and foiled again, Plankton reveals that this is all apart of the plan. Unimpressed, Skodwarde begins to use his god powers to to take down Plankton but the minuscule menace activates the mind control module in the Cum Condoms and everyone and their mothers who were having sex at the time all flock over to the Cum Bucket to hold back Skodwarde. Skodwarde fires some pew pew eye lazors but is overwhelmed by the sexually active Bikini Bottom populace. They hold Skodwarde in place as Plankton takes out a vibrator that he created especially for Skodwarde. He has his mindless drones shove it up Skodwarde nice and tight as it begins siphoning the power out of Skodwarde. They yank it out, tearing Skodwarde a new one in the process, and Plankton commands them insert the vibrator up his small, narrow bunghole. After some hard time pinpointing the location, they do just that and Plankton absorbs all of Skodwarde's god powers. He's all like "THE WORLD IS MINE TO COMMAND! TO CONTROOOOOLLL!!" as he displays his newly acquired god powers by rearranging the cosmos to look like himself. Plankton goes Jafar on Skodwarde's ass by breaking into a snappy song before blasting Skodwarde off on his way to the ends of the earth whoopee! Ex-prince AAAAALIIII! The skies darken as Plankton begins going mad with god power as Bikini Bottom becomes his oyster.

Meanwhile, Alec Baldwin is on the warpath as the Happy Song by The Poets of The Fall jam in the background. Having killed the two guys from Hillbilly Handfishing and subjecting their hick families and crew to venture into the swamp and get eaten by a bunch of saltwater crocodiles in an ironic cruel twist of fate. Alec later rests at the Push & Tug and is harassed by the Head Skinhead, who interrupts his sporting game of Words With Friends. And this is the last we'll hear of the Push & Tug crew...ever. Meanwhile, hundreds of miles away, Spongebob and Patrick are still laughing like idiots about their victory at the Push & Tug. They say that "Skodwarde's such a jerk" as they come across a stray ice cream truck being driven by a questionable Old Man Jenkins. Jenky offers them some "iced cream to go with their hotdogs" and Spongebob and Patrick innocently take his offer. The old man starts getting restless and invites them to venture into his truck since he has "more flavors" in the back. Spongebob and Patrick rightfully yells out "stranger danger" as they retreat to their Weinermobile and Jenkins tails them in his ice cream truck. After a perverted high-speed chase, the Weinermobile and the ice cream swerve off a cliff and down a deep trench. They hit rock bottom (no, not Rock Bottom) and before Old Man Jenkins can have his way with our two immature heroes, a large sea monster swallows him up (which should help to explain my departure from Skodwarde) Before the monster can eat out Spongebob and Patrick, Skodwarde comes soaring down and knocks the monster out with all his force, inadvertently saving Spongebob and Patrick from a cruel fate. Skodwarde explains to them the dire situation going on at Bikini Bottom, saying that he feels like he's lost his manhood now that he has no god powers, putting him on the same emasculate boat as Spongebob and Patrick.

They discover the horrors that surrounds this trench and are all scared shitless for their lives moving forward. They all decide to give up and admit they're nothing but a bunch of man-children. They make a plan to move to a new town, grow pedo mustaches, change their names to Ben Dover, Mike Hawk and Mike Hunt respectively before eloping and living happily ever after. Before they can go through with this game plan, Scarlett Johansson arrives in skin-tight black latex to show them what has happened to Bikini Bottom in their absence. The economy of the city is booming, tourism is on the rise, test scores are going up, unemployment is dropping, overall morale is at an all-time high, King Neptune is on his death bed due to his lack of penis and the frozen Krabs is being used as a sex doll for Plankton's pleasures. Our trio is unaffected by this until Scarlett shows Spongebob how Plankton has adopted Gary as his pet, thus making his role as an evil mastermind come full circle, and how he's using Sandy to give him small hand jobs. Scarlett shows Skodwarde how Plankton has used his god powers to wipe the Nazis out of the history books and she simply shows Patrick her tits in order to light a fire under his ass. To further motivate them, she fashions them those pedo mustaches they were planning on growing earlier out of her pubic hairs. Feeling empowered by their newly acquired facial hair, Skodwarde, Spongebob and Patrick set out to continue their quest to become Pokemon Masters by winning the Penis Badge in Shell City. Our trio sets off beyond the Mysterious Beyond as "Carry On" by Freedom Call rocks on in the background as Scarlett breaks things off with Sean Penn, seeing something special in Patrick.

So with their pedo 'staches, no monster dares touch the trio of Skodwarde, SpongeBob, and Patrick. After some hijinx in the monster pit involving hamboning (heehee, "bone"), SpongeBob, Patrick, and the Skod make it out alive and well. Just then, the three run into Alec Baldwin. However, none of them are worried because they have their 'staches. That is, until Baldwin rips them off in a Kim Basinger-induced rage. He shows them how to grow some pubic hair, and after scarring them for life (except Skodwarde, because he's seen it all, man), he prepares to stomp on them with spiky cleats (which we've never seen before). Just then, Bigger Booty (played by Jennifer Lopez) stomps Baldwin before he can stomp the trio. SpongeBob and Patrick sing the praises of Bigger Booty, but Skodwarde is upset that Booty is stealing his thunder, and thus creates plague upon plague in rage (in his mind, anyway, given that his god powers are gone). Bigger Booty has had enough of this shit and takes the three to her "gift shop".

After a night of bootylicious orgasms, google eyes, and "glue" (we'll let them retain their dignity just once), Skodwarde is disillusioned. For he had always thought that no one could best him at the game of sex. In a shocking turn of events, he decides to give up winning back his god powers for good, much to the shock of SpongeBob, Patrick, and all the nazis in the theater. Proclaiming "That's the end of Skodwarde!" they all promptly commit suicide. But the movie does not end! God (played by Morgan Freeman) comes to give an epiphany to Skodwarde, telling him that all the gods can live harmoniously, and that there is no need to give up the search for his powers. Soothed by God's relaxing voice (it's fucking Morgan Freeman, people), Skodwarde decides that his god powers are too special to give up. With the help of SpongeBob, Patrick, and JCM in a cameo, Skodwarde defeats Bigger Booty and earns new god powers. Oh yeah, and it turns out that the penis is there too. Go figure.

With a king's penis and a confident Skodwarde, the gang is ready to return to Bikini Bottom to SAVE THA WORLD. SpongeBob asks Patrick if he knows how to use the crystal meth. Skodwarde's then all like, "bitch, please" and snorts it all, raising his god powers tenfold. Using his newfound god powers, he propels SpongeBob and Patrick home. But before they make it, Bigger Booty and Alec Baldwin have teamed up for some sweet revenge against the trio. SpongeBob uses his vibrator of doom to distract Bigger Booty, and Patrick takes a cue from Scarlett, flashing Baldwin his Balls-win. Horrified by the terrible pun, Baldwin retreats, and Bigger Booty goes off to play with SpongeBob's vibrator.

What's happening during all this? Well, King Neptune and Scarlett are arguing over whether Scarlett is Joseph Stalin for some reason. Finally, Neptune has had enough and decides to burn Krabs once and for all. Plankton is also there to watch. I think it's some sort of sick fetish or something. But before he can fry the Krabs, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Skodwarde burst in with the penis. Plankton's all like "oh HELL naw" and slaps a Cum Condom onto Neptune's royal dick. Suddenly, Neptune is in Plankton's control. Basically, he's now Plankton's bitch. Just as he is about to annihilate the trio, SpongeBob realizes that there may never be another time to fulfill his lifelong goal. Out of the blue, he shouts, "THIS SONG IS DEDICATED TO GOOFY GOOBER", and breaks into his rendition of "I Touch Myself". The rendition is so good that Plankton's condoms fall off of everybody and they start singing the praises of sexy, sexy SpongeBob. Plankton is taken to jail, Mr. Krabs promotes SpongeBob to manager, and Skodwarde decides to hit the hay, but not before reading his beloved book, Mein Kampf.

David Hasselhoff runs down the beach, reminiscing over his Baywatch days. He then thinks, "Hey, I could get back into that," and decides to singlehandedly bring back Baywatch. He then considers that he may need a certain sponge. He calls on Elaine Benes (played by Julia Louis-Dreyfus) to dive into the ocean and determine which one is sponge-worthy. Elaine returns with Harold SquarePants, but unfortunately Claire has come along for the ride. She says "GET AWAY FROM MAH MAN" while Harold appears somewhat reserved. And on that note, the story ends. Yes, they are all idiots, aren't they?

[TJ]

Team SpongeBob - Season 6: Age Of The Airborne Disease

Ep.93 "Chaotic" (Part 1)

January 17th, 2013 7:30PM The Forbidden Lands

"Okay everyone, its time for us to head out." SpongeBob said as everyone gathered at the campsite.

"Ms. Rossfield, where will the plane crash?" asked Shin.

"On a hill, right when you enter Mainland." Ms. Ross revealed.

"Main Point?" Shin asked.

"Yes."

"Patrick and Sandy, you two will be heading there." Shin ordered.

"On foot?" Sandy asked.

"You have thirty minutes." Shin said sternly.

"Alright, but we won't be traveling on foot." Patrick said as he pulled up a huge boulder from beneath his and Sandy's feet with his terrakinetic abilities. He flew him and Sandy away.

"Good luck." their friends screamed from below.

"Alright, everyone else, on the S-Jet. We're heading to the secret bases."

January 17th, 2013 7:40PM The Forbidden Lands, Sand Dunes

The S-Jet was entering the base area. Immediately, henchmen began shooting fire arms at the ship.

"Let me out!" Shin said.

SpongeBob hit a button that opened the bottom of the ship. Shin flew out, keeping himself levitated with black magic.

"Mrotsdnas" Shin casted a spell, meaning sandstorm.

Suddenly, the soldiers were covered in sand gas. Allowing Team SpongeBob to infiltrate the center base.

Airships from the sky flew in and shot beams at the S-Jet which was on the ground. Shin put a barrier on it. "spihsria esoht edilloc" Shin said a spell which made the airships collide into eachother, creating massive explosions in the sky.

Shin ran in the building with the others.

January 17th, 2013 7:45PM Mainland, Main Point

Sandy and Patrick had arrived ontop of the large hill at Main Point.

"Alright, so where's this plane?" Patrick asked?

"We're early" Sandy told him.

"Then I'll keep you accupied."

Sandy and Patrick both turned around to find Pintar standing behind them.

"Pintar!" Sandy yelled, transforming to her robotic side.

Pintar shot out his spray paint, but Sandy jumped it.

Patrick chased after Pintar with rocks. Pintar combusted them with his spray.

January 17th, 2013 7:50PM The Forbidden Lands, Sand Dunes Main Base

Shin, SpongeBob, Pearl, and Ms. Ross encountered multiple guards through the hallways of the secret base.

SpongeBob used his super speed and karate skills to quickly bring them down.

One guard took at shot out Pearl while her back was turned, battling another guard. She ducked from behind, then shot an arrow at the side of his laser gun. It exploded and covered him in the black small, which knocked him down.

Shin and Ms. Rossfield used magic to subdue the rest.

Suddenly, Shin had a vision.

"Shin?" SpongeBob asked. Him, Pearl, and Ms. Ross gathering around him.

"LINDA!" he shouted out.

"THAT'S RIGHT! You said before, that she was here!" SpongeBob said racing off with his super speed.

"SpongeBob WAIT!" Shin shouted, but it was too late.

More guards arrived.

"We have to stay, stand, and fight!" Ms. Ross chanted.

January 17th, 2013 8:00PM Mainland, Main Point

"Sandy! The plane has arrived. Use your powers to hold it off while I hold off Pintar." Patrick said, terrakinetically shooting more rocks at Pintar, as he crushed through them all and spray punched Patrick to the ground.

Sandy used her Magnetism Manipulation powers to stop the plane. All of her strength went into this process. Holding it mid air is taking its toll on her. Now, her veins and muscles were visible even on her robotic side arms.

Pintar tried to attack her with spray, but Patrick quickly imprisoned his hands with tons of tiny rocks.

He broke out and shot a large spray attack at Pat, but he flipped over, dodging it.

January 17th 2013 8:00PM The Forbidden Lands, Sand Dunes Main Base

SpongeBob drifted off into a small lab room and spotted Linda inside a metal cast freezer.

He opened it.

"LINDA!" SpongeBob shouted in tears.

She awoken. "Linda?" SpongeBob called to her.

"Shou-ld..I..know you?" Linda asked, out of it.

"I'm your fiance. SpongeBob." SpongeBob told her.

"No. NO. I don't know a SpongeBob. But my memory has been out of whack for weeks now." she revealed.

"You lost your memory of your past, but Shin..our friend Shin can help you!" SpongeBob said.

"Sounds good.." Linda muttered.

SpongeBob took Linda and ran. They made it into some big room with a throne.

Suddenly, The White Queen flew down.

"Your days of hiding are over." The White Queen said to SpongeBob.

"Me and my team are DONE hiding! We have Linda and now we're READY FOR YOU!" SpongeBob said.

The White Queen quickly trapped SpongeBob and Linda in white magic-made body collars. Both of them fell to their knees.

Team SpongeBob - Season 6: Age Of The Airborne Disease

Ep.94 "Chaotic" (Part 2)

January 17th, 2013 8:05PM The Forbidden Lands, Sand Dunes Main Base

"These are the end of days for you SpongeBob and your little friends. All your deception, lies, and games have finally come to an conclusion!" The White Queen said mustering up all her powers.

"Let us go, your plans won't work! Sandy and Patrick have gone to stop the plane you sent!" SpongeBob revealed.

"That plan was made from technology too powerful to stop!" she said.

SpongeBob thought for a moment.

"The Shocker gave you tech info on the Splitsvire. DIDN'T HE?" SpongeBob said in an angry manner.

"It was all the perfect set up. You kids ran in circles. Chasing things that weren't there. Unbeknownst that I was behind everything! Of course, then my son entered the picture. He opened his trap to an archer girl who he had just met." The White Queen vented.

Suddenly, SpongeBob and Linda were free! Shin had tapped into the Queen's magic and freed them.

"SHIN! I was disappointed in you the MOST!" The White Queen cried shooting fleeting amounts of white energy at him.

He blocked her attempts while running around with barriers and force fields.

"I TRUSTED you all! Gave you a place to-" The White Queen started.

"NO CASSANDRA! You were decieving US. We trusted YOU! Offering us a placed to stay was your way of watching us to make sure we never learned the TRUTH!" Shin said, overcoming her white magic and blasting the crud out of Cassandra, with his black magic, which formed a dragon's head.

A large dusty explosion occurred as she was rammed into the ceiling.

Pearl and Ms. Rossfield had entered the large room and helped SpongeBob and Linda up.

"Guys, we gotta get out of here." Shin said.

"YOUR NOT GOING ANYWHERE!" The White Queen resurfaced and all of her white magic was in an aura around her. She was at her most powerful!

"Kiai! Release yourself! Go to mainland, and DESTROY IT!" Cassandra ordered.

"Kiai?" Shin asked.

"It is linked to an inner gathering of energy released in a single explosive focus of will." Cassandra revealed.

"Who is she talking to?" SpongeBob asked.

Suddenly, Linda's eyes turned orange, and an orange, red, firery aura surrounded her.

"LINDA!" SpongeBob screamed.

"EVERYONE BAAAACK" Shin ordered. Suddenly Linda flew throught the cieling in the center of a huge, bird like orange and red aura.

"This base is coming down!" Shin yelled.

Ms.Rossfield transported them out.

January 17th, 2013 8:40PM Mainland, Main Point

Sandy's concentrated on holding the plane, but it was literally tearing her apart. Pieces of her robotic side began to rip!

"Why Pintar? Why are you working with the Queen, AFTER we got you away from her? Pearl put everything on the line for YOU, which completely destroyed our mission, and it was all for NOTHING! You came right back to Mainland!" Patrick said with rocks.

"Pearl means nothing to me now." Pintar said dogding, spraying at Pat with his air paint.

Patrick dodged and side kicked a rock to Pintar's side. Sending him to the ground.

"Your lying.. and your about to be dead!" Patrick said ligfting up a huge boulder, but it was exploded by Brock's green energy beam.

Pintar blasted Patrick away.

"Glad you guys could make it to the party!" Pintar said.

"Its no problem at all!" Amy grinned, pulling out stilettos.

Suddenly, the rest of the team flew down from the S-Jet.

"Guys! Glad my friends could make it!" Patrick said.

Amy made way to Pearl, who blasted arrows at her, but with acrobatics, Amy avoided them.

Brock continuously blasted beams at Shin and Patrick who used boulders and barriers to protect themselves.

SpongeBob was being chased by Pintar, but he had a plan. SpongeBob ran circles around him as he went around and around trying to spray him. SpongeBob left and the spray gobbled Pintar, knocking him out.

SpongeBob went up to Sandy. "Keep it up, don't let the plane.." SB started.

In a flash, Linda as Kiai completely destroyed the plane by running through. A large and loud explosion erupted.

"What is that?" Sandy asked

"Linda...but she's possessed by something. Something called Kiai." SpongeBob said.

"She's heading for us!" Sandy screamed.

"If she crashes into this hill, everyone from here to a 25 mile radius will all die." Ms. Rossfield announced, standing by the S-Jet.

Everyone stopped fighting and awaited what was impending.

"I have to stop it." Sandy said.

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" Patrick ran over and embraced her.

"Sandy.." SpongeBob teared up.

"Listen, all of you.." Sandy started as Shin and Pearl walked up.. "I can re-route my systems to give out the fullest extent of my robotic side powers, thus using the fullest extent of the planet's magnetic field and absorb the fiery demon heading towards us." Sandy explained.

"Its not a demon, its LINDA!" SpongeBob said.

"I didn't mean literally," Sandy said.

"Sandy, but what will happen to you-" Patrick started, but Sandy had already grabbed his face and gave him a large kiss on the mouth.

"Don't worry baby. Everything will be okay!" Sandy said with tears flashing from her eyes. P

Patrick cried, then embraced Sandy as if he'd never see her again. Maybe that's what he thought in the back of his mind.

Everyone backed away from Sandy, standing on the cliff, impending the collision between the fire-born Linda and her.

It happened.

Linda went right into Sandy. Everyone watched as Sandy was engulfed in flames of a large orange, red, and yellow fire. Then an explosion which covered the entire hill.

Around five minutes later, the smoke cleared. The team went to the cliff. They saw Linda's dead body. Then pieces of Sandy's robotic side all over the place.

SpongeBob broke down on Linda's cold, dead body and tears poured down to his neck.

"Sandy's body..." Patrick said floating in his own river of tears.

"Probably completed burned and destroyed by Linda." Shin said, wiping waterworks off his face.

Pearl was on the ground herself. Hand over her face. Wet by the water on her face. Her tears.

Everyone heard police cars coming, helicopters, civilians. All approaching the mountain.

"Well this where everything changes." Amy said, backing up to Brock. Pintar went to them.

"Good luck explaining this to the entire island." Pintar said, spraying spray paint all around him and his team and they disappeared. Leaving the four remaining Team SpongeBob members, SpongeBob, Patrick, Shin, and Pearl, and Ms. Rossfield (who stood in the shadow of the S-Jet) to ponder how they would explain everything that had happened. They stood silently, with pained expressions on their faces as the reports, officers, and citizens approached them.

SEE YOU IN SEASON 7!!!!!!!!

[TJ]

Ep.34 "Boyfriend"

(Tom, Lou, The Black Horror, and Scooter travel to HeartStruck Bay.)

Lou: Why are we in HeartStruck Bay again?

Tom: Evelyn invited us. To a music resturant called Pianinos

Scooter: You don't like HeartStruck Bay, Lou?

Lou: I've had.....bad experiences here.

(The guys step out The Black Horror and into the resturant.)

Tom: Ev-

Evelyn: GUYS! So glad your here. I wanted you all to meet my new boyfriend!

Tom: Boyfriend?

(Big Mike jumps off stage.)

Big Mike: ME!

Tom, Lou, and Scooter: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Commercial Break)

--------------------------

Evelyn: What's wrong?

Tom: Uhh, Big Mike is a bad guy!

Evelyn: No! He beats up bad guys!

Lou: What?

Evelyn: Well here's the whole story. I was walking with groceries for my girls in the hotel we are in, when three men cornered me into an alley. Big Mike witnessed and beat them all up! He picked me up off the ground, then we looked into eachothers eyes, and the rest is history!

Tom: Some history (rolls eyes and huffs).

Lou and Scooter: (Crying) AWWW, THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL!!!!

Evelyn: Thanks guys!

Big Mike: Yea and since I'm dating Evelyn, I won't pound on you dorks anymore.

Lou: YES! FREEEEEEDDDDOOOOMMMM!

Evelyn: As a matter of fact, he's taking us all out to Rough And Chips. A tough resturant in the city! They have the best Muscle Milkshakes!

Tom: Count me out...(Walks out).

Lou: We're still in!

Scooter: Yeaaaa!

-------------------------

(Tom takes a ride in the Black Horror.)

The Black Horror: I can't belieeeve it. Evelyn and Big Mike!

Tom: Yea. Yea...........yea....

The Black Horror: Why are you so down?

Tom: I'm not down... (starts crying).

The Black Horror: OH MY NEPTUNE! Your HEARTBROKEN!

Tom: What? No I'm not (quickly wipes tears).

The Black Horror: You like Evelyn! As if it wasn't obvious.

Tom: Its obvious?

The Black Horror: Of course it is. You two always scream at eachother, you insult and put one another down,

Tom: -WAIT. Are you suggesting she likes me too?

The Black Horror: Yes, but she doesn't know it! Niether of you did. Something has to trigger it. For you, it was her dating another guy. For her....

Tom: I should date another girl!

The Black Horror: Or just tell her how you feel?

Tom: How do I do that.

The Black Horror: Man, I wish I could facepalm. (Leaves Room)

(Commercial Break)

------------------------------------

(Lou and Scooter come into a hotel room that Tom rented for the three for their stay in HeartStruck Bay.)

Scooter: WOOO! I'm off to bed! (Exits living room).

Lou: Why didn't you come to the resturant with us. We had the best time-

Tom: I have a crush on Evelyn and I'm gonna tell her.

Lou: (stays quiet)....(slaps Tom).

Tom: OWW, what was that for?!

Lou: Tom, sit down...

(They both sit on the counch.)

Lou: Look, if you take Evelyn from Big Mike, he'll be mean and want beat us up again! I DON'T WANT TO BE BEAT UP AGAIN! So don't tell Evelyn about your stupid love for her.

Tom: Wait, do you think I actually have a chance?

Lou: Of course you do, its been so obvious that she likes you and you like her.

Tom: Is it REALLY that obvious?

Scooter: (Comes out of room) Pretty much.

Tom: SCOOTER!

Scooter: Relax. Look how are you gonna tell her?

Tom: Oh, The Black Horror helped me write a poem. Did you guys know that he's a great poet?

Lou: A poem? Come on Tom...

Scooter: How about a song?

Tom: Hmm... I know the perfect thing!

(Commercial Break)

-----------------------------

(Evelyn and Big Mike are at Pianinos.)

Announcer fish: And now, stop eating, turn your chairs around and give it up for, The Backfin Boyz! Tom, Lou, and Scooter!!!!!

Evelyn: (Turns to Big Mike) What?

Announcer fish: Singing Ned And The Needlefish' big hook, "Boyfriend"!

(Tom, Lou and Scooter come on stage wearing leather black jackets, white T's, and blue jeans.)

All: Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boy...

Tom: Have you ever had the feeling you're drawn to someone?

(Yeah)

Any reason anything they could of said or done?

And everyday I see you on you're own

And I can't believe that you're alone

But I overheard your girls and this is what they said

All: That you're looking for a boyfriend

I see that

Give me time, you know I'm gonna be that

Don't be scared to come put your trust in me

Can't you see all I really want to be

Is your boyfriend

Can't fight that

Let me down you know I'm coming right back

I don't care at all what you've done before

All I really want is to be your

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Lou: Let me take a little moment to find the right words

(To find the right words)

So when I kick it you it ain't something that you've heard

(Something that you've heard)

I don't know what kind of guy that you prefer

But I know I gotta put myself for worst

See I think got the kind of love that you deserve And I heard

All: That you're looking for a boyfriend

I see that

Give me time, you know I'm gonna be that

Don't be scared to come put your trust in me

Can't you see all I really want to be

Is your boyfriend

Can't fight that

Let me down you know I'm coming right back

I don't care at all what you've done before

All I really want is to be your

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Scooter: If you tell me where, I'm waiting here

Everyday like slum-dog millionaire

Bigger than the twilight love affair

I'll be here

Girl I swear

　

Your looking for a boyfriend

I see that

Give me time, you know I'm gonna be that

Don't be scared to come put your trust in me

Can't you see all I really want to be

Is your boyfriend

Can't fight that

Let me down you know I'm coming right back

I don't care at all what you've done before

All I really want is to be your

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

(Your boyfriend)

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

(All I really want is to be your)

(Your boyfriend)

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

(Yeah)

(All I really want is to be your)

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

Your boy boy b-b-boy-b-b-boyfriend

All I really want is to be your...

Tom: Evelyn, can I be your boyfriend?

Evelyn: Yes! (Jumps on stage and kisses Tom)

(Big Mike storms out)

Tom picks Evelyn up and they resume kissing, with Scooter, Lou, and the whole audience cheering them on.