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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

Summer Tutor: Squidward is expecting fun this summer, but he gets tricked into agreeing to tutor a kid who has problems with music and art.

Jimmy's Third: Jimmy comes back once again and attempts to keep tricking Squidward down to his last penny, but then Squidward finds a way to trick Jimmy into going bankrupt. Will Squidward's diabolical plan work?

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

Crunch Time: The resturant is losing business, so Squidward and the employees decide to work as twice as hard to gurantee great and fast service.

The No-Go Salary: When the resturant owner goes on a business trip, salaries might be put on hold when Eugene Krabs is the replacement.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

The Wedding: Squidward and his girlfriend decide to continue on their relationship and decide to get married, along with Sam and Chad and their girlfriends. At the end, Squidward's girlfriend's married name is now Via Suctioner Tentacles, Chad's girlfriend's is Emily Inker Vongoer, and Sam's girlfriend's is Vanessa Pointer Extremepus.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

Honeymoon Mania: Now that Squidward and Via are married, the two need to decide on a honeymoon location. They then both suggest the Sunny Shores hotel because Via's reason is that there's great service with a romantic resturant, and Squidward agrees only because of the music convention that's happening there.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

Team Squidward: Squidward edges an athletic competition, so he gets Sam, Chad, Via, Emily, Vanessa, and the resturant owner on his team. Everything goes well, until Sam has to do a driving portion of the competition.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

Mismatch Maker: Squidward's best friend from his childhood, Kyle, is in great need on a girlfriend for the upcoming prom at his community college. So Squidward, Sam, and Chad go triple-dating with their wives along with Kyle to find any woman who's single and gets an interest in Kyle.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

Flying Sauces: Squidward finds out that Sam has a talent for making international pastries. So when Squidward needs all 195 international pastries in an hour for a honeymoon Via's holding, he accidentally inserts an ingredient that makes the pastries explode.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

95. Virtu-Date

Virtu-Date: Via really wants a romantic dinner with Squidward at an outdoor Hawiian themed resturant, so when Sandy gives Squidward virtu-googles which can take you anywhere you want, the two go to Via's dream resturant. But Squidward is jealous when the waiter starts hittung on Via.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

95. Virtu-Date

96. Party Rival

Party Rival: Squidward and Via are invited to the hottest couple party of the year, but Via is put into anger when the host is an old rival of hers.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

95. Virtu-Date

96. Party Rival

97. Anniversary

Anniversary: It's Squidward and Via's 2-month anniversary, and when Via gives Squidward an amzing present, Squidward must give also give an amazing one to her.

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2 more episodes to go

The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

95. Virtu-Date

96. Party Rival

97. Anniversary

98. The Long and Squidy Road (1)

The Long and Squidy Road (1): When terrible comments are left from customers on Squidward's music and he doesn't get his daily paycheck for a month, Squidward quits his job at the resturant. Meanwhile, Via lands a great job offer as a baby-sitter... in Rock Bottom.

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The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

95. Virtu-Date

96. Party Rival

97. Anniversary

98. The Long and Squidy Road (1)

99. The Long and Squidy Road (2)

The Long and Squidy Road (2): When Squidward, Chad, Sam, and Via drive to Squidward's last performance at the resturant, they take a walk down memory lane with clips from previous episodes at all the good times they had, and how they were always there for each other at the bad times.

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Welcome to the series finale folks! After this episode, I will reveal what show I will bring over from TV.Com next, but for now, the series finale of The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles:

The Adventures of Squidward Tentacles

Season 5

81. Allergic Squid/Party of Zero

82. Squid of the Future/Rick

83. Blast to the Past/A Rich One

84. Fair Science/The Loft

85. Rick's Final Stand

86. Squid's New Girlfriend/Construction Destruction

87. Priceless Squids/Driving Dilemma

88. Summer Tutor/Jimmy's Third

89. Crunch Time/The No-Go Salary

90. The Wedding

91. Honeymoon Mania

92. Team Squidward

93. Mismatch Maker

94. Flying Sauces

95. Virtu-Date

96. Party Rival

97. Anniversary

98. The Long and Squidy Road (1)

99. The Long and Squidy Road (2)

100. The Long and Squidy Road (3)

The Long and Squidy Road (3): Squidward's last performance at the resturant goes out with a bang, and he gets thunderous applause. Squidward and Via start to have second thoughts about moving to Rock Bottom after Squidward's last performance is phenomenal and realizing how hard it'd be to say goodbye to everyone. At the end, the two move to Rock Bottom since Squidward realizes it's more important to think of others before yourself.

The next show I'm bringing from TV.Com is...

Spoiler

Aaahh! Talking Sea Creatures! (3 episodes, sbs1fan)

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Sorry about the delay, here's the first two episodes of AAAHH! Talking Sea Creatures!

Season 1. Aaahh!!! Talking Sea Creatures

(S1)(Ep.)1. Mistaken For A Normal Sponge-

Spongebob: Come on Patrick! its time for school.

Patrick: Sorry.

Patrick,Spongebob and Squidward are going to the Talking Above Water Academy, where fish and other sea cratures learn to scare humans as much as possible by talking. When they got there they were late, and when creatures are late, Jerry the teacher doesn't like it at all. Today was there first day that they would go above water and scare humans. Spongebob, Squidward, and Patrick got paired up to go with eachother above water. There assignment was to scare one human each. Squidward and Patrick got there scares in, but Spongebob had failed. Right as he was about to talk a person grabbed Spongebob and started to use him as a normal sponge. Spongebob was then set out on a window sill to dry out. Spongebob had to figure out a way to get out, before all the water on him evaporates. Squidward and Patrick didn't notice that he was gone untill they got back underwater, but when they noticed that he was gone, they went up above water and saved Spongebob just in time.

(S1)(Ep.)2. Patrick The Confident- When Patrick is assigned to scare a young kid, he gets overconfident, and instead of scaring the young kid by talking, he gets offtrack and starts to do other things. Spongebob and Squidward tried to get him back on track but they couldn't. When Patrick finally relized he was off-track, he paniced and blamed Spongebob and Squidward for everything. Even though it wasn't Spongebob & Squidwards faults, they helped him anyway. Patrick scared the kid by just saying "hi". Patrick eventually thanked Squidward and Spongebob for all of there help.

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Season 1. Aaahh!!! Talking Sea Creatures Season 1

(S1)(Ep.1)1. Mistaken For A Normal Sponge-

(S1)(Ep.1)2. Patrick The Confident

(S1)(Ep.3)3. Immuned From The Scare- When Patrick Squidward & Spongebob go above water, they scare the same people over and over again. One of the people was a scientist. The scentist was trying to figuer out how you could get immuned from the disease. One Day the scentist finally did it, he created a shot so that if you get scared by talking once, you will never get scared again. This caused a panic to sea creatures everywhere. Sea creatures would have no more school. But this wasn't a good thing, when sea creatures stop going to school they forget how to speak. If they don't go to school for a whole year, they will become normal sea creatures. Suprisingly, Patrick was the only sea creature that knew how the humans store all the shots in a big container. Patrick went above water and dumped the container of shots into the ocean. All sea creatures were saved from becoming normal sea creatures, now they can go back to school and scare humans by talking again.

Welp, that's all she wrote. Stay tuned next week for other TV.Com shows being re-runned here on SBC. :)

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I decided to replace this generic statement, with a more constructive use of space. Mainly, a re-run of a "Total Cartoon Island Strikes Back" episode! Enjoy! /

Sniz and Fondue, are standing on a familiar dock on an island in Lake Michigan, not seen for a number of years. Sniz says: “Greetings, fellow old-time viewers, and HOPEFULLY new viewers!” General Barracuda asks: “WHAT new viewers?!” Fondue says: “Ignore him!” Sniz says: “Noted, moving on! For anyone joining us for the first time, welcome to Nickelodeon's hottest gaming/competition show, that pits well-known Nickelodeon cartoon characters against each other, all for the chance for them to win a big cash prize at the end, as well as the notoriety, of having won a season of this show. For the past three seasons, we've had notable winners in Stimpy, a tie between Dog and Larry, as well as an unexpected giveaway win, to Reggie Rocket. But we're not here to talk about past seasons, we're here to talk about a new season. Now, for some reason, most of the contestants who competed in the first three seasons, opted NOT to come back to play in this season. In fact, only two former contestants, wanted to come back and play in this season. Namely, Po and Tigress. Also, only 12 new contestants applied to join this season. We'd like to think that because the quality of the competition was so high last season, that only those who were supremely confidant about their own skills, dared to enter this time. In fact, arriving on boat RIGHT now, are the 14 contestants, who will be competing this season!” Bessie Higgenbottom jumps off the boat first, and she says: “Wow! This is so cool, riding on a boat! Did you know my great-great-great grandfather actually built a boat?! Old Ironsides, they called her! It fought in the Civil War, against the--!” General Barracuda slaps his fin over her mouth, and he says: “Thank you for that 'HELPFUL' information, Bessie! I have a feeling that SHE'S going to be a lot of fun! By the way, I'm being sarcastic!”

Sniz sarcastically retorts: “Really? We couldn't tell! And here comes pop-star Brittany Miller...apparently, with a LARGE entourage!” Brittany Miller descends the gangplank, and she is inexplicably being photographed by a BUNCH of media paparazzi, following her every move! Brittany is on her cell phone, and she says: “Yeah, I'm like, on the island right now, Alvin! No, I DON'T know why they asked me, and not YOU, to be on this show! Don't worry, I'll be sure to give plenty of shout-outs to you! Just make sure that MY albums sell like hot-cakes in the mean-time!” Sniz says: “Brittany, your contract is only good for YOU, not your entourage! General Barracuda, if you don't MIND!” General Barracuda smirks, and he says: “With pleasure!” And he GRABS a giant air gun, and he uses it to BLOW the paparazzi, and Brittany's cell phone FAR away! Brittany says: “No biggie. I've got three OTHER cell phones at home!”

Rico runs down the gangplank on all fours, with Kowalski running after him! Kowalski says: “Oh, dear! Rico broke off of his leash, AGAIN!” Sniz says: “Kowalski, you know that this show REALLY isn't sanctioned for wild animals like Rico, don't you?!” Kowalski is miffed, and he says: “Hey! Rico isn't wild! He's been house-broken for over a week, now! He's perfectly harmless, as long as I can control him!” Than mystical music appears out of nowhere, and Katarra eerily floats up out of the boat, and propels herself over to where all the other contestants have gathered. Katarra, without even opening her eyes, says: “Something's strange. I sense the presence of Blonda, but no other Fairy Godparent interns.” Blonda busts out of her luxury cabin, wearing an official soccer referee outfit, and she says: “Did somebody mention my name?!” Sniz says: “Well, we WERE going to introduce YOU later, but Katarra, this is Blonda. Blonda, these are our contestants for the new season!” Blonda looks them over, and she says: “Hmm, not much to look at. Still, I'd rather be COACHING them, than competing against them!” Theodore Seville runs down the gangplank, and he says: “Pardon me, but when are we going to get the free food and snacks?!” Brittany says: “Free food?! Theodore, you just ATE!” Blonda says: “According to MY sources, he always just ate!” Fee struts down the gangplank, and she says: “Oh, yeah! Little Bark representative is in the HOUSE! Big shout out to Harvey Beaks, Technobear, Kratz, and Foo back at home! You know I love you all, Woo WOO!” Blonda says: “Well, you DO have some pretty hair, Fee!” Fee says:” Thank you!”

Blonda says: “But not as pretty as mine!” Fee's mood sours, and she says: “Give me a minute, and I can fix THAT fact, PERMANENTLY!” Blonda smugly says: “I would LOVE to see you TRY! Of course, I'd love to see anyone I hate as a crater!” Po runs down the gangplank, and he says: “You are NOT, going to be doing any of that! Not as long as I'm around! After all, I think the last thing that any of us want THIS season, is for there to be any unnecessary VIOLENCE against our fellow contestants!” Kowalski says: “Well, I certainly agree with you on THAT front! I'm not sure Rico feels the same way!” Rico looks at the other contestants, with an indeterminable expression, and he merely says: “Bleh!” General Barracuda gives Kowalski a perplexed look, and General Barracuda says: “Eh, I really didn't understand what Rico was trying to say.” Kowalski says: “Don't worry about it, nobody does!” Danny Fenton walks down the gangplank, and he nervously says: “Hi, I'm Danny Fenton. And I'm, here to try to win this season, I guess!” Tigress can be heard groaning loudly, and she says: “UGH!!!! That was SO pathetic! Out of the way, let a TRUE champion show you how it's done!” Tigress kicks down the door of the boat room she was staying in, does several forward jump flips on the boat, leaps OFF the boat, and rolls forward on the ground, before springing forward, to land perfectly on her two feet! Tigress says: “I am Master Tigress! The one, the only, the world-renowned, the exceptionally trained, and incredibly epic Kung Fu Master, who has ever trained on ALL seven continents! If you're already unnerved by me now, you're free to save yourself the trouble, and go home right now! I don't tolerate losers, getting in my path of winning! THAT'S how you make a proper introduction!”

Po groans, and he says: “Tigress, whatever happened to LAST season?!” Tigress says: “Come on, Po! This act is all for show! I'm just giving the fans what they want! And you all know they want me to kick butt! I can't help it if I know what I'm good at! And what I'm good at, is kicking butt! See how that works?” A snooty voice says: “Well, I hope you don't think that tactic will work on ME, because I have no plans on just, quitting!” And Bubble Bass appears, eating a BIG Krabby Patty, NOTICEABLY without any pickles on it. He stomps down the gangplank, noticeably IGNORING all the other contestants around him! Bubble Bass says: “I thought this was going to be more like an ACTUAL game show! You know, like Double Dare, Nick Arcade, or Legends of the Hidden Temple!” General Barracuda says: “Oh, I'm sorry! You must be mistaking this show, with a game show parody that Nickelodeon will NOT be making!” Bubble Bass seems to be greatly offended, and he says: “Oh, so you're going to act like THAT to me, are you?! Well, I can dish it out just as well as I can take it!” General Barracuda seriously says: “Well, THAT remains to be seen now, doesn't it?”

Jenny XJ-9 flies out of her cabin, lands on the ground, and says: “Hi, I'm Jenny Wakeman, also known as XJ-9! Long-time fan, first-time competitor! I don't really care if I win or lose, I hope to at least make it past the first few rounds and make a decent showing. As a matter of fact, I'd kind of like to start with a hard challenge first. You know, REALLY get a chance to show off some of my skills! I feel supremely confidant in my own abilities, to help me prevail in whatever comes my way.” Bubble Bass says: “You WOULD, wouldn't you?!” Jenny is legitimately taken aback, and she asks: “What is THAT supposed to mean?!” Bubble Bass just retorts: “Oh, wouldn't YOU like to know?! Well, too bad! You can take it however you WANT to take it! I'm not going to bother providing context for YOU, or anyone else for THAT matter, unless I WANT to!” Johnny Krill shouts: “Context?! What's 'Context'?! I know we're in a contest, but nobody said anything about something called 'Context', being involved!” General Barracuda sighs, and he sarcastically says: “Oh goody, it's my favorite military F-4 failure, Johnny Krill!” Tigress asks: “You mean he's an athletic failure?” General Barracuda says: “No, worse! He's as dumb as a rock!” And even though nobody asked for it, Johnny Krill proves the General's point by diving off the boat, only to land helmet first on some sharp rocks, and REBOUND onto some sharp cactus growing on the island, before jumping off onto the ground!

Kowalski says: “Uh, I hate to be predictable, and complain about logic on the first day, but, cactus isn't NATIVE to environment of Lake Michigan, and the nearest desert is over a 1,000 miles away.” Blonda says: “I have a magic wand, your argument is invalid.” Private says: “There's an argument?! Do you need me to help you, Kowalski?!” Kowalski says: “No, you REALLY don't need to do that! I think I can handle any other argument that comes my way!” Private says: “Even so, I'm coming to help you!” And Private gets ready to head down the gangplank, but TRIPS on the first step, and rolls down it, BUMPING straight into Bubble Bass, whose left fin accidentally KNOCKS one of General Barracuda's teeth CLEAN out of his MOUTH! General Barracuda quickly covers his mouth in shock, turns away from the camera, and frantically begins to look for the missing tooth! General Barracuda frantically asks: “My mouth! My priceless, insured, valuable, $40 million dollar mouth! My tooth, where's my tooth?! Someone's going to pay DEARLY for this!” And Bubble Bass looks flabbergasted, and he asks: “What did I do?!” Sniz says: “Well, I hope you find your tooth, General Barracuda! In the meantime, it looks like all 14 contestants are here, so it's time to explain how this season will work for all of you. You will be divided into teams of two, and you will fight head to head in 13 challenges, and one Performance Review, in order to determine supremacy between each of you, and your respective shows. As mentioned earlier Blonda is now part of the show, as a coach/referee, and will be supervising all the challenges, to ensure there's no foul play!” Kowalski asks: “What makes BLONDA qualified to be a coach/referee?!” Blonda says: “I have a whistle, your argument is invalid! Also, I''m being forced to do this because I'm on probation, on account of all the bad behavior that I did LAST season!” Sniz says: “Also, you can expect to see some of our old favorite contestants pop up from time to time, to demonstrate how the challenges work, or as paid interns helping to make this show run properly!” Po says: “Nice to know that Tigress and I aren't the ONLY familiar faces returning this season!”

Fondue says: “And finally, the biggest twist of this season, all of the Fairy Godparents except for Blonda are now on STRIKE!” Danny asks: “Why is that?!” (Flashback) Two random male fairies get together, and one says: “I'm not poofing anything!” The other one says: “I'M not poofing anything!” And the first one asks: “And why is that?” And they suddenly sing: “Cause we're on STRIKE!!!! We're on strike, we're on strike, we do anything we like!” And the second one asks: “And why is that?” And they both sing: “Cause we're on STRIKE!!!!” (Flashback ends)

Fondue shrugs his shoulders, and he says: “Who knows? In any case, that means that for this season, I have gotten us replacement magical help, in the form of the Anti-Fairies of The Fairly Oddparents!” Anti-Cosmo creepily appears, and he says: “Finally! A chance for ME to be in the limelight for once! It just feels SO refreshing for Anti-Poof and I to be let out of the Anti-Fairy world for once!” Sniz gives Fondue a dumb-struck look, and Sniz says: “Fondue, I thought you were JOKING about getting the Anti-Fairies to work for us!” Fondue says: “Sniz, I never joke about anything! We're NOT going to wait for the Fairy strike to be over! Time is money! And time waits for no one! We are GOING to do this season, and we're going to do it NOW!” Sniz says: “But Fondue, there is no telling what sort of magic, fair or foul, may befall our contestants this season!” Fondue says: “And I'm telling you that I don't CARE! Look, if it makes you feel any better, I will take FULL responsibility for ANY mayhem, or BIG ratings, that this season is going to get!” Sniz sighs, and says: “Very well, then! In that case, may luck be on your side, contestants! And, as of right now, on OUR side as well, as we enter what may be the riskiest entry in our series so far, Total Cartoon Island Strikes Back! For the last time, Fondue, I have a feeling that this Anti-Fairy business is going to be a bad idea!” Fondue says: “Noted and ignored, moving on!” /

The following musical sequence shows Sniz walking slowly through the brand new hotel, lip-syncing to the song. He walks out to the pool, where Blonda is lounging on a pool chair, wearing white shades, in a yellow, full-body swimsuit, than puts her finger and her thumb into the shape of an “L” on her forehead. The camera quickly pans up the mountain, than down into the water of the lake, to show Private trying to catch fish, but missing every single time he tries to catch one! Kowalski catches him with a highly sophisticated crane machine, and pulls him up out of the water, but Rico tackles Kowalski, causing Kowalski to CRANK the machine too hard, and throws Private HIGH up into the air. Private lands into the lap of Katarra, who is floating in the air in a clearing, and Private is CREEPED out by how she is doing that! In the same clearing, Po is picking up mushrooms, only to be playfully slapped on the back by Tigress, who motions him to challenge him to a race! The camera pans to the left, to show Danny Fenton and Jenny in a canoe on a river. Danny is acting dramatically to Jenny, who is too interested in watching him to notice that they are headed towards a waterfall, which they fall down! Down below, Johnny Krill is on a log bridge, showing off his strength by lifting a heavy tree log! But when Jenny and Danny land on the log, the weight is too much for the log bridge that Johnny is standing on, and they fall into the water below! The camera pans to the left, to show Bubble Bass standing outside the public restroom, looking at the situation, wondering if he should do something to help them out, but his thoughts are interrupted when General Barracuda comes out angrily of the restroom, looking for someone to take his anger out on, until both of them are distracted by a delicious smell coming from the cafeteria. In the cafeteria, Fondue puts on a pair of earphone mufflers, than he grabs a big spoonful of chili to give to Bessie Higgenbottom, who is shown to be running at the mouth! Fondue than puts the spoon of chili into Bessie's mouth to make her STOP talking! The camera than pans to the left, to show Fee taking meticulous care of her hair with hairspray, until she notices the camera looking right AT her, and she sprays her hairspray into the camera to get them to stop filming her! The camera than pans outside, to show Tigress and Po have finished running, and Tigress jumps up and down in joy as she has clearly beaten Po, while Po just pants in exhaustion! The camera pans to the right, to show former contestants Patty Mayonnaise, Norbert, Rocko, Spongebob, Lil, Otto, and Stimpy under a sign that says “Intern try-outs”, listening to Anti-Cosmo talk about something; but when he ignites his wand to show off his magic, lightning inexplicably comes to STRIKE him, causing everyone else to laugh as a result! The camera pans further to the right to show Brittany Miller looking ABSOLUTELY fabulous, and posing for all the entourage paparazzi taking pictures of her, but she's interrupted when Sniz appears on a jet-pack above her, and dumps a bucket of water on her, ruining her mood. The scene transitions to night, when Po and Tigress are sharing a tender moment together, until General Barracuda appears in a haz-mat suit, holding a pair of metal tongs which is holding a purple marshmallow, which causes Po and Tigress to reel back from it with apprehension. The camera than pans out to show all the contestants, General Barracuda, Sniz, Fondue, and Blonda around a campfire. The camp sign at the entrance reads: Total Cartoon Island Strikes Back created by Jason Cantu. /

The show intro plays, to the tune of a VERY familiar hit song by Smash Mouth! Greg Camp sings: “Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me. I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape of an 'L' on her forehead. Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart, but your head gets dumb. So much to do, so much to see. So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go, you'll never shine if you don't glow. Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play! Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid! And all that glitters is gold! Only shooting stars break the mold! (Whistles, scatting). Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play! Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show, on get paid! And all that glitters is gold! Only shooting stars! Somebody once asked, could I spare some change for gas? I need to get myself away from this place! I said, 'Yep, what a concept.' I could use a little fuel myself, and we could all use a little change! Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming, fed to the rules and I hit the ground running! Didn't make sense not to live for fun, your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb! So much to do, so much to see, so what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. (Go!) You'll never shine if you don't glow! Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play! Hey now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid! And all that glitters is gold! Only shooting stars break the mold! And all that glitters is gold! Only shooting stars break the mold!” /

Everybody's a Critic!” / The show opens up again, and Sniz says: “Welcome back to our first episode of the new season, already in progress! It's time to break you up into groups of two! Johnny Krill and Po, will you two step forward, please?” Johnny Krill asks: “Just step forward?! I'm Johnny Krill, man! I NEVER just step forward!” Tigress rolls her eyes, and says: “Just what I needed; Twister 2.0!” Po says: “Sure, but, why do you want the two of us to step forward?” Sniz says: “Because you two are going to be the team leaders of the two teams, this season!” Johnny Krill says: “Awesome, man! The competition hasn't even started yet, and I'm ALREADY a winner!” Tigress says: “You know that the designation of 'Team leader', is a purely cosmetic title, right?” Johnny Krill says: “Yes, but that doesn't mean that I can't enjoy the designation any less, girl!” Tigress spares him a brief smile, and says: “Well, at least you're nowhere NEAR as STUPID as Twister was! Maybe this season won't be so bad, after all!” Sniz says: “Now, when I call your name, you will join either Po, or Johnny Krill, in alternating fashion! Rico, you're with Po!” Rico unexpectedly shouts: “Blah!!!!” Sniz says: “Tigress, you're with Johnny!” Tigress groans, and she says: “Of course I am!” Po whispers: “Don't worry, I'll go easy on you, so the other team won't vote you off!” Tigress says: “You just worry about your OWN safety, and leave the worrying of MY safety, to myself!” Sniz says: “Kowalski, you're with Po!” Kowalski says: “Being with the power panda should prove greatly advantageous to my ability to prevail in team challenges.” Sniz says: “Bessie, you're with Johnny!” Bessie says: “Awesome! You know, my great-great-great grandmother once tamed tigers in Africa, along with Stanley, Doctor Livingstone, and--.” Tigress yells: “No one CARES, Bessie!!!!” Fondue says: “THANK you!” Sniz says: “Private, you're with Po!” Private says: “Really?! I'm usually picked LAST for these sorts of things! This could be the start of something new for me!” Sniz says: “Brittany, you're with Johnny.” Brittany says: “Well, it's about time SOMEONE recognized true talent and beauty!” Tigress says: “You may be talented, but you sure aren't STRONG!” Brittany scoffs, and she says: “Everybody's a critic! You see what I did, just now? I just did a title drop!”

Sniz says: “Jenny, you're with Po!” Jenny says: “Cool! I always wanted to fight side by side with a Kung Fu Master!” Po says: “If there IS any fighting this season! There's no telling what kinds of challenges we may end up facing!” Sniz says: “Bubble Bass, you're with Johnny!” Bubble Bass says: “Wouldn't be the first time I was ordered to do something I didn't REALLY like! Still, I've been in WORSE situations before. I suppose I can make this work.” Tigress says: “Let's hope so, for YOUR own sake!” Sniz says: “Danny, you're with Po!” Jenny says: “That's cool! We're on the same team together!” Danny nervously says: “Yeah. This should be...exciting!”

Sniz says: “Katarra, you're with Johnny.” And Katarra eerily floats over to where Johnny is, and Johnny asks: “How are you doing THAT, girl?! That's just super-freaky!” Katarra calmly says: “It's air-bending. Anyone with a mastery over the wind can float on even the gentlest breeze! And also, I've been reading your auras! Johnny, you are a self-proclaimed daddy's boy, with a need to impress your father who's never home, by winning a bunch of trophies in order to fill the empty void in your life. Tigress, you have a superiority complex, driven by your ingrained drive to win at everything you do, and a need to dominate the main man in your life. Bubble Bass, your snide, sarcastic comments are driven by feeling over-protected by your mother, and your need to break out of your jerk-face facade, because you currently have no friends.” Bubble Bass panics, and asks: “Who told you that?!” Kowalski asks: “Say, what does Rico's aura read like?” Katarra closes her eyes, and she says: “Hmm, I can't really get a fix on Rico's aura, it's all jumbled up like a puzzle with a bunch of pieces that don't really fit together; but I AM picking up something interesting in regards to Danny Fenton. It feels like his soul, while originally intact, has for reasons unknown, become fractured into many different, unique pieces. Almost like they were split personalities, each fighting for control in the same body!” Danny nervously says: “What?! That's just ridiculous!” Sniz says: “Theodore, you're with Po!” Theodore nervously says: “Okay, just don't expect me to do a lot of running, or heavy lifting! I'm only a chipmunk, you know!” Po says: “Don't worry, I have enough strength for ALL of us!” Kowalski says: “Maybe, but do you have enough immunity for all of us?” Sniz says: “And Fee, you're with Johnny!” Fee says: “Woo-hoo! Ain't no party, like a Fee, female party! Because the Fee female party don't stop!” Bessie says: “Ooh! I like parties! In fact, my great-great-great uncle P.T. Barnum, invented the concept of parties, when he invented the circus, which included elephants, acrobats, lions, and monkeys, and--.”

Blonda says: “Stop, Bessie, STOP!!!!” Sniz says: “THANK you! Everyone who is with Po, your team will henceforth be known as the Power Pandas!” And a green emblem, with a strong panda, appears as their team logo! Sniz says: “Everyone who is with Johnny Krill, your team will henceforth be known as the Killer Prawns!” And a red logo, with a strong krill, appears as their team logo! Tigress asks: “The Killer Prawns?! You would THINK you could create a more original team name than THAT, like 'Team Tigress and her team is unstoppable' or something like that!”

Sniz says: “Well, that won't be happening for NOW; but maybe some other time! Now, as far as living conditions go, just like in the first season, you will normally be living in cabins, and eating whatever Fondue and General Barracuda feel like cooking. But as a brand new, first-time bonus for this season; starting now, and lasting the rest of the season, the winning team and/or contestants, who win the challenges, will get to spend the time between challenges, relaxing at our brand new luxury hotel for winners, eating at an all-you-can eat buffet, and getting pampered however you see fit. As for the Losing Team and/or contestants, they will have to face a dreaded Elimination Ceremony, will someone have to be voted off, and take the Slingshot of Shame!” Private says: “Slingshot?! What happened to the Dock of Shame, or the Walk of Shame that Skipper told me about?!” Sniz says: “We were inspired by The Angry Birds Movie! And don't worry, losers WILL be wearing protective gear, and land on a gigantic pillow! After all, safety IS our number one concern!” Bubble Bass looks at Bessie, and he says: “And I have a feeling that I already know who I would want the FIRST boot off of our team to be!” Tigress says: “And I find it SHOCKING that I actually AGREE with you!” Sniz says: “Also, in a change from our first season, you will no longer need to use a stinky outhouse as the Confessional. This season, you can use our very own cafeteria, to make any Confessions that you want to!” (Confessional) Private is in the very clean cafeteria where there are a lot of long, white tables around. Private says: “So the reason why I joined this season, other than wanting to help out Rico and Kowalski, and avenge Skipper, is that Skipper says that I'm really not as coordinated as the rest of them. So, I hope these challenges will help in training me better!”

(End Confessional) Sniz says: “Now, with that explanation out of the way, it's time to perform our first challenge of the season!” Brittany says: “Wait! We're doing a challenge ALREADY?!” Sniz says: “We only HAVE 14 episodes ordered, as far as WE know! And there's only 14 of you! This season, with the exception of the Performance Review and the last episode, every single CHALLENGE will be an Elimination Challenge!” (Confessional) Tigress chuckles, and she says: “Now THIS is what I'm talking about! I like these odds! I find that I always perform better when there's pressure involved! If I play my cards right, I won't have to stick around any losers for long! This season could work out to my advantage!” / Jenny says: “Well, my human mom...which is kind of hard to explain without the proper context, told me that this season of competition might be a little rough, but this show has NEVER been THIS hard before! Still, if I can prevent hostile aliens from annihilating the human race on a daily basis, I'm sure I can handle a little old competition. I just got to stay focused on my surroundings, and not let myself be caught off guard by any other contestants who might want to do me or anybody else any harm!” (End Confessional) Sniz says: “For our first challenge this season, you must either choose to run or swim, to the other side of the island!” Po asks: “Well, what's the difference?” Sniz says: “Well, there are different types of dangers, obstacles, and advantages to both methods of travel. Trust me on this. Now, once you get to the other side of the island, each team will be looking for a chest with their team emblem on it, and bring it back here. The first team that brings back their chest with its contents intact, will win the first challenge, and immunity until the next challenge! And I think you can safely guess about what happens to the LOSING team!” Fee rolls her eyes and says: “Elimination. Well, it can't be any worse than NOT being invited to Princess' lame parties, or being 'shamed' by Dade, simply because I don't like to play by HIS rules! Still, I don't plan on losing anytime soon!” Johnny Krill says: “Neither do I! I want to win this thing just as much as the rest of you do!”

Tigress chuckles, and she says: “Now that's my kind of talk!” (Confessional) Tigress says: “Despite not being a team captain, it looks like I might have lucked out this season. I have a leader who wants to win as much as I do. It won't be easy competing against my main man, Po. But then again, nothing much fun in life ever IS, easy! Besides, every single challenge makes me grow stronger and better as a Kung Fu Master!” / Johnny says: “Even though my dad isn't around much, he always taught me to be observant, and look around at my surroundings, and at others who are around me. That way, I will know how to react to anything that comes my way! That's how winners are able to WIN so often! It's the secret of MY success!” (End Confessional) Private says: “I pick swimming!” Jenny says: “I pick running!” Johnny says: “I pick swimming!” Tigress says: “I pick running!” Bubble Bass says: “I pick swimming, its one of the FEW sports I'm really GOOD at, for OBVIOUS reasons!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “If you must ask how it is that fish creatures like me and Johnny Krill, are able to be IN an environment that has a lot of air in it, without a water helmet, it is very simple! Sandy Cheeks created some pills which stabilize an aquatic creatures ability to retain water, even if they are not completely surrounded by it. We only need to drink water when we absolutely need to, just like a land creature would. It's actually a pretty handy trick, if I do say so myself. Still, I won't get far if I think that there will only be swimming challenges, because there is certainly no way that they will only play to that strength of mine this entire season. So, I will have to mostly rely on my other strength. Namely, my intellect and ability to create clever plans! Of course, playing the way Bulma Briefs did is not going to work. It bit her in the butt QUITE hard! Besides, I don't need to be THAT devious in order to win, and I don't need a stick in order to get what I want. I just need the carrot. Besides, I heard that you can attract a fly a lot better with honey, than you can with vinegar. How that relates to any challenges I might have to face? I honestly have no idea.” (End Confessional) Danny says: “I pick running, I guess!”

Than Danny suddenly jerks, and adopting the pose of an elderly man, and imitating Rodney Dangerfield, he says: “Running?! The only running I like to do is running away from tax collectors who want a piece of my 401K! No respect, I tell you!” Than Danny jerks back to normal, and Private asks: “What was THAT?!” (Confessional) Private says: “Thanks to my experience as a Penguin Commando in training, I'm used to seeing a lot of weird things, but that might be the WEIRDEST thing I've ever seen, even by NICKTOONS standards! Is what Katarra said TRUE?! That there are different aspects to Danny's personality?” / Danny nervously says: “I...have a slight problem. You see, I have the ability to go ghost, or, turn into a Phantom. I call myself Danny Phantom. But lately, I have been experiencing a slight...hiccup when it comes to my ability to do that. Apparently, whenever I go ghost, it puts a strain on my psyche, and drives the aspects of my personalities apart! Now, instead of being able to GO ghost whenever I want, the different aspects of my personality instead, wants to CHANNEL ghosts, and strangely enough, of FAMOUS people! Obviously, I've been trying to figure out a cure for this problem, and stabilize myself. But I can't do it with the limited resources and money that I have. I hope that by winning this season, I'll be able to put that money towards buying the materials that I need, in order to stabilize my personality, and fix it so that this problem doesn't keep popping up!” (End Confessional) Po says: “I pick swimming!” Fee says: “I pick running! Nothing is going to mess up MY beautiful hair perm!” (Confessional) Fee says: “It may not look like it, but I have to work VERY hard, in order to get my hair looking as good, and as pretty as it does! I am the ENVY of Little Bark! And confidentially, I think Harvey might have a crush on me! Of course, it would be very hard for him, to NOT have a crush on me!” (End Confessional) Kowalski says: “I pick swimming!” Theodore nervously says: “I pick running, I guess. I don't feel that comfortable in my swimming shorts just yet!” Fee says: “You could always swim in the NUDE, like my brother Foo does!”

Bubble Bass gives Fee a shocked look, and he says: “First off, T.M.I., too much information! And second and most importantly, YOU disgust me!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “If there's one thing I can be proud of, that differentiates myself from other challengers, is that I believe that EVERYBODY should have standards! And even though I personally don't have a LOT; the ones that I do have, I value VERY highly! I honestly don't know how FEE got picked to be in this season!” / Fee says: “I was just telling it like it is! I certainly don't think it's MY fault if the other challengers find it disgusting! Besides, certain people can be such PRUDES, you know!” / Theodore says: “I'm mostly here to lose some weight, and hopefully do something that will get Alvin and Simon to notice me more.” (End Confessional)

Rico says: “Bleh!” Fondue asks: “What did he say?!” Kowalski says: “He says that he picks swimming!” (Confessional) Kowalski says: “Just for the record, I did not sign on for this season to primarily be Rico's translator! I came here to see how I would do in a competition of this nature. Mostly, FOR the SCIENCE!” / Rico shrugs his shoulders and says: “Bleh?”; as if to say, 'I don't know.' (End Confessional) Bessie says: “I pick running, because bees don't like to get wet!” Brittany changes into a VERY fancy swimsuit, and she says: “I pick swimming, it will give me a chance to get in the next issue of People Magazine!” Theodore's eyes open up wide, and he says: “Wow! You look INCREDIBLE!!!!” (Confessional) Theodore says: “Why have I never noticed before just how BEAUTIFUL Brittany looks before?! I mean, what rule says that I HAVE to fall in love with Eleanor, just because she has the same shape that I do?! I mean, that would make me SUCH a narcissist if I did that! Besides, Brittany would NEVER be happy with Alvin, they'd just FIGHT all the time! I've got to try to get Brittany into my LIFE, somehow!” / Brittany says: “Being the successful pop diva that I am, I must take every opportunity to strut my stuff whenever there's an opportunity to do so! After all, my albums and my brand TECHNICALLY don't sell themselves, you know. Though it would be pretty COOL, if they did!” (End Confessional) Katarra eerily floats forward, and she says: “I will be running, if I FEEL like letting my feet touch the ground.” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “Have I already mentioned just how much that Katarra girl CREEPS me out?! Somebody has got to nail that girl's feet to the FLOOR! Or, something that doesn't involve nails, that keeps her tied to the ground! Seriously, THAT isn't natural!” / Bessie says: “I wish I could fly like THAT! Did you know that my great-great-great Uncle twice removed on my father's side INVENTED the first practical airplane in 1903?! His name was--!” (Confessional cuts early). The swimmers have all changed into swimming gear, and the runners are all ready to go. Sniz says: “Okay, everybody has picked what they are going to do, and everybody is raring to go! Let's get this show on the road!” Fondue says: “Right! Anti-Cosmo?!” Anti-Cosmo appears, and says: “You rang? I always wanted to say that!”

Fondue says: “Start us off!” Anti-Cosmo says: “Right! Ready? Set, GO!!!!” And he ignites his wand, but a bolt of lightning inexplicably comes down to hit him, and the racers make down their different paths. Anti-Cosmo coughs and says: “Funny. That sort of thing NEVER happened to David Copperfield!” Blonda chuckles, and smugly says: “Looks like Anti-Cosmo is having some MAGIC malfunction! Isn't that right, Snizzie-Poo?” Sniz says: “I guess so. And DON'T call me 'Snizzie-Poo'! Got it?!” Blonda says: “Yeah, I got it! Old KILL joy!” / Brittany, Johnny, Kowalski, Private, and Rico are all starting to swim through Lake Michigan, while Bubble Bass SURPRISINGLY swims fast pass by them, and Po suddenly catches up to them! Kowalski asks: “Po, since when was Bubble Bass able to move so fast?!” Po says: “I don't know why you're asking me! I personally don't know anything more about him than you do!” Johnny says: “From what I know, there are only TWO reasons Bubble Bass EVER moves fast! Either he smells a bite of delicious food from ten miles away, or he can sense the smell of something dangerous in the water!” Rico says: “Bleh!” Kowalski nervously says: “Rico just said we're not alone!” And four shark fins appear to break the surface of the water! (Confessional) Brittany says: “I just want to state, for the record, I did NOT sign up for this show to be menaced by sharks! I only signed up for this show as a chance to look fabulous, as well as the free screen-time, and using it as a publicity stunt to help move the albums of both the Chipmunks and the Chipettes!” Brittany sighs, and says: “There, I gave you a promo, Alvin! Can I get paid now?” / Bubble Bass says: “For the record, I was not SCARED! I just wasn't interested in fighting ANY sharks if I didn't have to! Besides, I'm sure Po can fight them off! I mean, he IS a Kung Fu Master! And besides, them being busy with the sharks, will give me PLENTY of time to do some deep sea diving around here! I mean, there's got to be SOMETHING valuable around here! Otherwise, Sniz and Fondue wouldn't even do a show here!” /

Po says: “When it comes to normal sharks, they are totally NOT a problem! Unfortunately, these WEREN'T just any ordinary sharks!” (End Confessional) The four sharks emerge from the water, equipped with heat-seeking MISSILE launchers, and eyes that shoot FREAKING laser beams! Private asks: “Sharks that shoot LASER beams?! That's impossible!” Kowalski says: “Unless their basic D.N.A. Structure, has already been altered by the Anti-Magic of the Anti-Fairies, and they've mutated them into some kind of super sharks!” Po shouts: “Guys, scramble!!!!” And everyone EXCEPT Po scatters in five different directions, and Po just floats still, awaiting the onslaught of the sharks! Johnny asks: “What are you DOING, Po?!” Po says: “I'll hold them off! You go and finish the challenge!” Brittany says: “Better you than US, if you ask me!” Johnny says: “How DARE you call yourself a team player!” Private says: “Even RICO knows better, and at least HALF of him is on the side of NOBODY except his own deranged, random thoughts!” And Rico affirmatively says: “Bleh!” Brittany says: “Well, I'm NOT going to be fighting any sharks! As a chipmunk, I am not equipped for the rigors of such laborious tasks! I'm going to keep swimming, and keep looking fabulous!” And Brittany swims off on her own, and Johnny shouts back: “You better hope we don't lose this, because your immunity chances just sunk SUPER low!” Kowalski says: “Private, Rico and I will stay here and help Johnny and Po! You better go on ahead and get that chest for us!” Private sighs, and says: “All right! I hope you know what you're doing!” (Confessional) Brittany says: “Some men and women are BORN to take risks and face danger on a daily basis! I am NOT one of those women, and I have no intention of EVER being one! The only risk I want to face, is having to decide which of my GLAMOROUS outfits, I should wear at the next Grammy Awards Ceremony.” / Johnny says: “All in all, this is NOT a stellar start to my time as Team leader of my team! I should have the respect and confidence of my entire team, and instead, I'm quitting Squiddly Diddly, if you know what I mean! Note to self; when this challenge is over, I will ask Tigress just what it takes to be a Team Captain!” / Po says: “Sending Private ahead was a purely strategic decision! It's not that we doubted his ability to fight, we just needed someone to win the challenge! It was nothing personal!” (End Confessional)

Johnny says: “All right! It's time to send these freaks back to the Cannery! Preferably, Cannery Row in Monterrey, California!” Po says: “I sure hope the runners are having as ROTTEN of a time as WE are!” / The action switches to the runners, and it is showing TIGRESS absolutely kicking BUTT, as she continuously knocks down robot after robot that SNAPTRAP is sending out, to try to attack the runners, but Tigress keeps BREAKING them before they have the chance to do so! Snaptrap yells: “Would you MIND your own BUSINESS, Tigress?! You are RUINING my plan to make a bunch of MONEY off of this season!” Tigress says: “You're SO pathetic! Your ideas NEVER work! And you have NO credibility, now that you and Angelica are an item!” Snaptrap says: “Shows what YOU know! Angelica told me that she has actually found MY fur to be quite comforting to the touch! Not to mention, that SHE pleases me, in a way that nobody else EVER has!” Tigress sarcastically says: “Bravo. You both just won Bronze, Silver, and Gold, in being able to find the most PATHETIC partner in the HISTORY of Pathetic partners!” Snaptrap says: “I'll show YOU pathetic! Wait! Who won the Gold?!” Tigress says: “That was a RHETORICAL statement!” Snaptrap says: “That really needs to come BEFORE the statement! I can never tell with you! In any case, you can't stop ALL my robots!” And before Snaptrap can even blink, Tigress destroys every single last one of Snaptrap's robots! Tigress asks: “Want to BET?!” Snaptrap growls angrily, and he says: “You win THIS round, Tigress! Smoke screen exit!” And Snaptrap throws down a giant smoke bomb, and makes his escape before anyone can stop him from doing so! Fee says: “Man, I hate it when a villain pulls an 'Exit, Stage Left'.” Jenny says: “I really wish you would have let us help you fight, Tigress.” Katarra floats forward, and without even opening her eyes, merely says: “It is not wise to argue with Tigress. She's the type of warrior who might rip your ARMS off if she loses a fight! Tigers HAVE been known to do that!”

And everyone looks at Tigress, as she flexes her arm muscles, and kisses BOTH of her strong muscle bumps in her arms! Theodore nervously says: “Yeah, I see your point. Jenny, I suggest a new strategy going forward. Let Tigress handle all the fighting!” (Confessional) Tigress says: “For me, fighting, even if it's just a bunch of robots, is a VERY serious business for me! I take everything seriously, not because I HAVE to, but because I usually want to! When I enter in a competition, than my 'Fight' mode, is usually my default mode! I don't see any point in changing a winning strategy!” / Katarra still has her eyes closed, and she says: “It is said that the tree that will not bend, must ALWAYS inevitably BREAK!” / Theodore Seville says: “I'm just going to say that anybody who would WANT to face against Tigress in a Final Two BESIDES Po, would have to be pretty crazy in order to do so!” (End Confessional) Bessie says: “You know, these robotic remains are pretty interesting! In fact, my great-great-great grandfather, was one of THE fathers of Modern Robotics! He figured out Digital processing and--!” Fee gets annoyed, and fiercely says: “For once in your LIFE; Bessie Higgenbottom, SHUT UP!!!!” Bessie says: “Shut up?! Why, certainly! You don't think I'm the type of person who keeps on blabbing and never shuts up?! I know lots of people who keep on blabbing and never shut up! Some people just don't know when to stop blabbing and when to shut up! But when I'm told to shut up, I shut--!” Theodore loudly cries: “Shut up, Shutting up!” And Katarra closes her eyes, and sends down a lightning bolt that hits Bessie Higgenbottom DIRECTLY in the mouth! Danny says: “WOW!!!! Were you the one who hit Anti-Cosmo with a lightning bolt earlier?!” Katarra says: “Due to the nature of the competition we are in, I will neither confirm nor deny that I had ANY role in letting nature take out its frustration on that SHRILL of a girl, or an Anti-Fairy! However, I'll let you have three guess as to what the correct answer is, and the first two don't count!” Danny says: “Don't worry! I totally got you on THAT count!” (Confessional) Katarra says: “I send down a lightning bolt to take care of anyone that annoys me. Or, whenever I need a good laugh! Who says Water Benders don't have a sense of humor?!” / Danny says: “Note to self; remember to NEVER get on Katarra's BAD side!” (End Confessional)

Meanwhile, on the far side of the island, Private is the first contestant to arrive to search for the treasure chest! Private says: “Wow! I'm actually the first contestant here! But, where's Bubble Bass? He was way ahead of me!” / The action swifts to Bubble Bass, who is looking for stuff on the bottom of the Lake. Bubble Bass says: “Now, let's see. If I were something valuable, where would I be hidden?” And his eyes suddenly spot a bunch of PRETTY sea jewels, of sapphire and aquamarine colors, glittering on the lake floor! Bubble Bass says: “Now THAT'S what I'm talking about!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “Unlike Bulma, I'm not going to waste the entire season trying to WORK for something that I might not even get! If there's an easy opportunity to get some easy money from this thing, I'm going to take it! I mean, it would be totally stupid NOT to!” (End Confessional) Bubble Bass begins stuffing his short pockets with the jewels, when all of a sudden, SPONGEBOB swims in, only he's completely NAKED!!!! Spongebob asks: “Bubble Bass?! You're still wearing clothes?!” Bubble Bass asks: “And you're NOT?! Why are you even here?!” Spongebob says: “Neptune's Moon just hit Bikini Bottom! Every single sea creature who saw it turned feral! And after that, when Neptune's Moon was extinguished, every single sea creature who saw the moon, ended up turning up naked! It's chaos in Bikini Bottom! That's why I've been traveling around, searching for SOMEONE who might be able to give us some money for some new clothes or something, because no one in Bikini Bottom can walk INTO a store without any clothes to wear, which is honestly, kind of a Catch 22. And I'm honestly surprised that I know what that IS! Could you spare some jewels for some new clothes?” Bubble Bass says: “New CLOTHES?!!! Get them yourself! I have FAR more important things to worry about than the concerns of a sponge who I don't really like, and I only tolerate when its CONVENIENT for me to do so!”

Spongebob says: “But this is your chance to do something nice and DIFFERENT for a change! You should take the chance to enjoy it!” Bubble Bass says: “I already AM doing something nice and different! I'm competing in a game show, partially to lose some weight, and get more athletically fit! And if I can win some money for my mom, all the better for me! Besides, I see absolutely no scenario right now, in which me, helping you, would help me get what I want. I mean, what would my incentive be, anyways?” Spongebob suggests: “The reward of doing something nice for someone without expecting anything in return?” Bubble Bass asks: “What kind of FOOL came up with that?!” Spongebob says: “I'm not sure. It was just a SUGGESTION, anyways! You're no help, I'll find someone else!” And Spongebob swims away!

Bubble Bass says: “Good riddance! It would be a cold day in Davy Jones' locker before I ever help that creepy little sponge out!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “In my life, there are two MAJOR things I don't like! I don't like being told what to do, and I don't like sponge's who have a TERRIBLE concept of personal space, and whether or not they are annoying you! And I don't care if he thinks it IS mean! Unlike Squidward, I'm not going to lie and even PRETEND that Spongebob is someone I would want to be around with! It's the principle of the matter, and I'm sticking to it!” (End Confessional) The camera shifts back to Private, and Private says: “In any case, I can't afford to mess around! I need to find our chest quickly, and bring it back to Sniz and Fondue! I'll just take a look around first, to see if it's out in the open, before I spend my time trying to excavate in random spots!” / The camera shifts back to Bubble Bass, and he's STILL stuffing his shorts with a bunch of blue jewels! Bubble Bass says: “I personally don't know how these jewels got here; and quite frankly, I don't care! All I know is that I am going to be living the good life, once I sell these off to the highest bidder!” Than all of the sudden, PATRICK swims in, and HE'S completely naked to! Patrick says: “Bubble Bass?! You haven't been affected by Neptune's Moon?!” Bubble Bass replies: “How would I be affected by Neptune's Moon? I wasn't even IN Bikini Bottom when it happened?! And where are YOUR shorts?!” Patrick says: “Obviously, I lost them!” Bubble Bass asks: “Can't you just go back home and put on a NEW pair?!”

Patrick says: “Would you believe it's the ONLY pair I had? I sunk all my money into getting my rock gold-painted and gold plated!” Bubble Bass says: “You WOULD do something as insipid and as meaningless as that! And having only one pair of shorts TOTALLY sounds like you!” Patrick asks: “Anyways, would you please give me some jewels so I can buy some new ones?” Bubble Bass seriously says: “Spongebob already ASKED me that STUPID question! If I said 'No', to him; what makes YOU think I would say 'Yes', to you?! You rank even LOWER on my Toleration-o-meter than Spongebob does!” Patrick says: “I thought you might have changed your mind! I mean, give me ONE good reason as to what those jewels would do for you, that helping someone else wouldn't!” Bubble Bass says: “I could come up with 1.4 MILLION reasons that the jewels are more helpful to me than YOU are, and not all of them revolve around cash!” Patrick groans, and he says: “Fine! Continue being selfish! It won't help you in the long run!” And Patrick swims away! (Confessional) Bubble Bass asks: “What is this, a STUPIDITY convention?! I haven't been around THIS many morons, since the Society of the Nitwits decided to roll into town! I wonder if Neil Degrasse Tyson ever has days like this?!” (End Confessional) The camera shifts back to Private, as he's frantically looking all over the place for the hidden chest of the Power Pandas! Private says: “It won't be too long before the other team gets here! I just need to think about this logically! If I were hiding a chest for a Power Panda, where would I hide it?! I mean, what do pandas like more than anything else in the world?!” And Private looks around, and he spots a big bamboo grove! Private says: “Of course! Pandas eat bamboo in the wild! It's like the main staple of their diet!” (Confessional) Private says: “I pick up a lot of information about wild animals by watching programs off of Animal Planet, and occasionally, The Wild Thornberries! Who says knowledge doesn't pay off?!” (End Confessional) Private says: “Chest, here I come!” And he hears some rustling in the bushes, and the runners for the Killer Prawns emerge from them! Tigress says: “All right team, we made it! Now it's time to find our chest and help ME win like I always do!” Fee strongly asks: “WHAT?!!!”

Tigress says: “Freudian Slip! Said 'Me', meant to say, 'Us'!” Private says: “And just in time, to! With Tigress' mad skills, its not going to take her too long before SHE figures out where HER team's chest is! I just hope the rest of my team arrives soon to help me carry my chest back!” (Confessional) Fee says: “I just want to state that if it were up to me, there's no way I would let someone as self-absorbed as TIGRESS, get anywhere NEAR the Final Five! I just hope I last long enough to actually DO something about it!” / Tigress says: “Note to self; I REALLY got to work on getting into being a team player more, and not make anymore slip-ups like that!” (End Confessional) The action switches back to Bubble Bass, and he finishes stuffing his shorts, and even his shirt pocket, with jewels! Bubble Bass says: “Well, that's all of them! Now, I just got to hang onto these, until I can figure out a way to sell them! There's bound to be SOMEBODY who will pay a good price for these!” And Bubble Bass swims forward a bit, and he inevitably BUMPS into a treasure chest! Bubble Bass asks: “Now who would put a hunk of metal down on this...LAKE?!!! Wait; this is the treasure chest that MY team needs to find! But, why is it hidden down here! Oh, wait! Our team is the Killer PRAWNS! And where do prawns normally live? In the water! It makes perfect sense! If I can get this chest back to our team, I'll finally be treated with the amount of respect and admiration I deserve!” And Bubble Bass tries to pick up the chest, but he can BARELY lift it off the ground! Bubble Bass asks: “What is this chest MADE out of, solid gold?!” (Confessional) Anti-Cosmo says: “It was totally MY idea to make the chests out of solid gold; Awesome, but Impractical for the contestants to carry, but totally FUNNY for me, to watch them struggle!” (End Confessional) Bubble Bass continues to struggle, but he just can't lift it up by himself! Bubble Bass groans, and he says: “It's no good! I'll never be able to move this hunk of junk by myself! Oh, the absolute IRONY! If only I hadn't blown off my team earlier, I wouldn't BE in this predicament right now!” Than unexpectedly, Larry swims by, and HE'S completely naked, to!

Larry asks: “Bubble Bass, you're still wearing clothes?!” Bubble Bass asks: “Larry?! Wait! Don't tell me, let me guess; Neptune's Moon?” Larry asks: “How did you know?” Bubble Bass replies: “Spongebob and Patrick already came by earlier, asking me for some help with their problem!” Larry asks: “So why didn't you help them?” Bubble Bass answers: “Well, if you must know the honest truth, I didn't think it was that important for me to do so at the time. But you're a strong guy, right? How about you help me with this treasure chest?!” Larry says: “I don't know. Why should I help YOU out?! You wouldn't give any help to Spongebob and Patrick when THEY asked for it! Why should I extend any favors to YOU?!” Bubble Bass says: “Because you actually ARE a good guy and are supposed to do that?!” Larry says: “Ordinarily, that would be enough. But because you DISSED my good friends, Spongebob and Patrick, you're going to have to step up to MORE than THAT!!!!” Bubble Bass says: “D'oh!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “Of ALL the double-edged ironies! How could I POSSIBLY forget that Spongebob and Patrick are friends with Larry?! And now I'm stuck having to suck up to him?! If I didn't NEED the money so badly, I wouldn't even CONSIDER helping him! But because he's so strong and can probably beat me up if I refuse, it looks like I'm going to have to swallow my dignity, and CONVINCE him to help me!” (End Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “Fine! I'll give you...10% of the jewels I found to help you buy some new clothes!” Larry says: “Make it 20%!” Bubble Bass strongly says: “10%!” Larry defiantly says: “20%!” Bubble Bass yells: “10%!” Larry smugly says: “30%!” Bubble Bass asks: “What happened to 20%?!” Larry asks: “Did I stutter? And there's only one direction I'm going to go from here, and it's NOT in your favor!”

Bubble Bass groans, and he says: “Fine! 20%!” And Bubble Bass counts out 20% of the jewels he gathered, and hands them to Larry, who puts it in a make-shift sea purse he made off of the ocean floor! Larry says: “Nice doing business, with you!” Bubble Bass says: “Thanks for not beating me to a pulp! Now help me!” Larry says: “Say the magic word!” Bubble Bass rhetorically says: “NOW?!!!” Larry says: “No. The ACTUAL magic word!” Bubble Bass gulps, and he says: “I just ALMOST threw up in my mouth! Not THAT!!!! ANYTHING but THAT!!!!” Larry says: “It's that, or NO assistance from me!” Bubble Bass says: “Fine!” And Bubble Bass seems to really struggle, grunt, and groan, as Bubble Bass slowly, and seems to incorrectly pronounce: “Puh...lee...ase?!” Larry asks: “Is THAT the best that you can say, 'Please'?!” Bubble Bass says: “Is THAT how they pronounce it?! Well, excuse me, but I've never really HAD to say that word before!” Larry says: “From the way YOU said it, I can believe it!”

Bubble Bass says: “You can make fun of that all you want when you get back home! Now, will you...KINDLY just help me out?” Larry says: “Gladly!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass groans, and appears to have a coughing fit! Bubble Bass says: “AH!!!! Ptooey! Ptooey! Ptooey! I have NEVER felt such a strange combination of pity, and indigestion! Is THIS what being NICE, feels like for someone who's never actually BEEN nice before?! I REALLY need to get some more practice with that, so that it doesn't FEEL so hard in the future!” (End Confessional) The action shifts back to the beach, where everyone is frantically digging around, searching for their respective treasure chests! Private digs for a bit in the bamboo grove, until he LITTERALLY hits his flippers onto his treasure chest! Private yells: “GUYS! I FOUND it!” And the rest of his team, who chose to go swimming and running, finally catch up to him! Danny says: “You actually found it?! That's great!” Than Danny suddenly jerks, and SUDDENLY channels Bette Davis! Danny, imitating Bette says: “It's absolutely FABULOUS! I always KNEW you'd find that treasure chest first, REALLY I did!” Than Danny jerks back to normal! Private looks at him weirdly, and Private asks: “Seriously, what's up with that?!” And Danny looks nervously! (Confessional) Danny says: “Look; I'm obviously not going to LAST long on this team if I keep this thing to myself! I'm going to have to tell SOMEBODY sooner or later!” (End Confessional) Danny says: “Look, I'll explain it to you later once we're alone! But not now! There's other team-members present!”

And Danny points to Jenny Wakeman, Kowalski, Rico, Theodore, and Po, whose SHORTS are missing! Jenny asks: “Po?! What happened to your shorts?!” Po says: “They got burned off by those stupid Super sharks I had to fight! It's HARD to dodge a bunch of heat-seeking missiles and freaking LASER beams in the water!” Jenny asks: “What?!” Kowalski says: “It's a long story! We'll explain later! Private says: “Guys! We have a problem!” Jenny asks: “What's that?!” Private says: “This chest is TOO heavy for me to move!” Jenny says: “Let me use my X-ray vision!” And Jenny's eyes turn green, and she scans it! Jenny says: “The problem is, the chest is made out of solid gold!” Theodore asks: “But, why?!” Jenny says: “Does it matter? We have to figure out a way to move it SOMEHOW!” Kowalski says: “Just feed it to Rico! His stomach can handle anything!” Po asks: “How would THAT help us?!” Kowalski says: “He can regurgitate it later! Trust me! He does this kind of stuff all the time!” Rico nods his head, and says: “Bleh!” Theodore sighs, and says: “All right! You better be RIGHT about this!” (Confessional) Theodore says: “If Rico's stomach actually CAN handle that heavy chest, I will be TRULY impressed!” / Kowalski says: “Rico's stomach is practically bottomless, and practically indestructible! How is he able to do it? Even MY scientific methods haven't come up with a definitive answer yet! But as long as he can do it, that's all that matters to me!” / Po says: “It's a good thing that I'm no longer as self-conscious about the way I look as I used to be! Of course, you should see how the SHARKS look! They REALLY took a beating from me and Johnny!” (End Confessional) Private, Danny, Theodore, Jenny, and Kowalski all get behind the treasure chest, and they ALL shove it into Rico's mouth until it lands with a THUD into Rico's stomach! Theodore says: “Okay, this is OFFICIALLY the weirdest thing I have ever done in my life!” Kowalski says: “If you stick around with us LONG enough, I PROMISE you'll do and see weirder!” Po picks up Rico with some GREAT effort, and Po says: “I'll carry him! I'm the only one strong enough to do so!”

Jenny says: “All right! Now let's get back to the campsite! Let's go, go, go, go, GO!!!!” And they all run off in a hurry, except for Theodore, who REALLY struggles! Theodore says: “Slow DOWN a bit! I can't RUN that fast!” Tigress groans, and she says: “This is TAKING too long! We should have found our chest FIFTEEN minutes ago!” Fee sarcastically says: “Well, EXCUSE me for not being as super, supremely competent as her 'HIGHNESS' demands!” Tigress asks: “Is that supposed to be a DIG at me?! Because I'm telling you right now, I DON'T appreciate contestants who make DIGS at me!” Fee says: “I'm just telling it like it is! No need to take your anger out on me! Why don't you take it out on Bessie?! All she has ever done since she's gotten here is TALK, and she's been absolutely NO help whatsoever in this entire endeavor!” Tigress says: “Well, what about Brittany? All she's done is show off and flaunt her celebrity status! And I'm PRETTY sure she SUCKS at everything!” Katarra closes her eyes, and says: “We can keep Brittany for now, but we might not GET another chance to LOSE the dead weight also known as BESSIE! We might not get another shot to DO so!” Tigress says: “I'm all for that, ESPECIALLY if Bubble Bass AND Johnny ever GET here!” Bubble Bass, Johnny, and LARRY all emerge from the lake, and Bubble Bass pants, and says: “Here I am! I got your STUPID chest for you! I hope you APPRECIATE it, since it WEIGHS like 800 POUNDS for us to CARRY!” Tigress looks at Johnny and Larry, and notices that THEY are naked! Tigress asks: “What happened to your clothes?!” Larry says: “Neptune's Moon.” Johnny says: “They got burned off by the super sharks with heat-seeking missiles and laser beams!” Tigress says: “Well, it's about time you FOUND the treasure chest, the other team is already ahead of us!” Bubble Bass says: “Well, we need to decide what we're going to do if we LOSE! Have you thought about MY idea yet?!” Tigress says: “Fee is all for it! And if you can get Johnny to agree with us, than we're all golden!” Brittany finally arrives, and finishes showing off for the entourage and she says: “Sorry I'm late! I just had to finish giving off a few PUBLICITY photos for my ADORING public! They can't get enough of me!”

Tigress says: “Well YOU should consider yourself lucky, that we're willing to keep YOU on, because there's someone else around here, who needs to be taken care of first!” Bessie asks: “Are you talking about Katarra?! Because she creeps me out!” Johnny says: “It's not just you. She has that effect on everybody!” Katarra says: “I'm floating RIGHT HERE!!!! I can HEAR every single WORD that you are SAYING!” Johnny says: “Than I don't have to repeat myself!” Tigress says: “Give me that chest! You are ALL making this more DIFFICULT than it needs to be!” And Larry and Bubble Bass HAND the treasure chest to Tigress, and she's able to HOLD it like it was NOTHING!!!! Bubble Bass says: “WOAH!!!! I'm glad you're on OUR side!” Tigress says: “For now! Just remember to WATCH yourself if you manage to last until the team merge! Because after that; no promises!” Bubble Bass says: “Understood!” (Confessional) Bubble Bass says: “No doubt about it! It's better that I try to make an alliance as soon as I can, instead of trying to make it on my own. I just hope that Tigress and Johnny are all for it.” / Fee says: “Tigress needs to get a check-up from the neck up, and take a SERIOUS CHILL Pill!” / Katarra says: “A fool who talks and says EVERYTHING, but does NOTHING, is of no more use than someone who is UNABLE to do anything!” / Brittany says: “I'm...sensing some hostility from Tigress! This whole competition thing is going to be a LOT harder than it looks! It looks like I might have to step it up a bit! I don't want to be the next one voted off AFTER Bessie!” (End Confessional) Tigress says: “All right, I've got the treasure chest! Let's get GOING, guys and girls!” Larry says: “Well, it looks like you've got everything handled here! I'm going to go and buy everyone in Bikini Bottom some new clothes!” Bubble Bass says: “Okay, YOU go do that! Just don't tell Spongebob and Patrick that I helped you! I've got a reputation to maintain!” Larry says: “No promises!” And Larry disappears back in the water!” Tigress says: “We'll run back, it's faster!” Brittany says: “Let's hope so, for YOUR sake!” Tigress says: “You're in no position to talk, you know! If you had BEEN here to help, we might have gotten this done so much sooner!”

(Confessional) Brittany says: “It's official! Tigress OFFICIALLY hates me!” / Tigress says: “It's not so much that I HATE Brittany, I just have zero tolerance for incompetence, and just generally sucking at being anything other than being famous! And for what?! Selling a FEW million records?! Newsflash, Brittany; I'm famous, to! And unlike you, I actually had to EARN my fame the HARD way; by fighting evil!” (End Confessional) The teams race back towards camp, and Private says: “Look, there's the finish line!” Jenny looks back, and she says: “And there's Tigress coming up fast!” Po says: “We'll never cross before she crosses!” Kowalski says: “Quickly! Throw Rico across the finish line!” Po grunts, and he THROWS Rico forward as fast and as far as he can! Tigress, in slow-motion says: “NO!!!!!!!!!!” And Rico lands at the feat of Sniz and Fondue, and COUGHS up the Treasure Chest! Sniz says: “And it's OVER! It's all over! The Power Pandas WIN the FIRST challenge!” Tigress groans, and in regular motion, yells: “We LOST!!!! I can't believe WE LOST!!!!” And Tigress begins to have a coughing fit, and Bubble Bass asks: “Are you coming down with something?!” Tigress yells: “I can't STAND LOSING!!!!” Katarra says: “And that's putting it MILDLY!!!!” Sniz says: “General Barracuda, open up the treasure chest!” General Barracuda raises his right fist AND punches the lock right off of the chest, revealing a golden key! Sniz says: “Power Pandas, here is your key to get into the hotel, and have free run of the buffet, and all of the hotel amenities, until the beginning of the next challenge, as our free bonus to you!”

Private says: “Yahoo! We DID it!” Po smiles, and he says: “We ALL did it, working together!” Sniz says: “Killer Prawns, what can I say? It sucks to be YOU guys right now! You can unpack and pick out the cabin of your choice, and take this time to decide who you will be voting off, in the first Elimination Ceremony, of this brand new season!” (Confessional) Tigress says: “If this had been a straight up race between Po and just me, there's no WAY Po would have won first!” / Po says: “It's a good thing I have a whole team to back me up! Tigress is one TOUGH opponent to beat on my own!” (End Confessional)

Private and Danny are standing outside the hotel, and Private looks really surprised! Private says: “REALLY?! You're serious?!” Danny says: “It's true! My ability to 'Go Ghost', is malfunctioning, and now I'm channeling the spirits of Dead Celebrities! You've already seen at least a couple of them! But I don't want anyone else to know about this, they'd just freak out and jump to the wrong conclusion! Look, can you keep this a secret between us?” Private thinks about it, and he says: “I know! We can play it off, like you're just 'Acting!' Just tell everyone that you're thinking of becoming an actor once this season is over, and no one will think twice about your celebrity impressions!” Danny asks: “Isn't that LYING?!” Private says: “It won't be, if you actually DECIDE to enroll INTO some acting courses when you get back home!” Danny thinks about it, and he says: “Well, you got me there! All right! I'm game!” Private says: “Good! I'll help you sell your acting abilities, and we'll be able to keep this thing under wraps until this season is over!” Danny says: “Cool! In the meantime, we'll see if we can't DO something about your FAKE British accent!” And Private looks absolutely SHOCKED! (Confessional) Private asks: “Why does EVERYBODY always think that I have a FAKE British accent?! Why would I FAKE a British accent?! I just don't understand it!” / Katarra says: “I just want to state, for the record, that I read Private's aura! His British accent is TOTALLY authentic! There's no WAY you can fake THAT!” (End Confessional)

It is now night time, and the Killer Prawns are now sitting around the campfire! Sniz says: “Welcome contestants, to the first Elimination Ceremony of this new season! Killer Prawns, what can I say? Today was not a stellar day for many of you. Brittany Miller, it seems like you were too concerned with showing off to the media paparazzi following you around all day, instead of helping out in the challenge. Bessie, you spent WAY too much time talking, and not enough time helping! Bubble Bass, you had a REAL difficulty in learning how to give and accept help earlier, which really could have helped your team out sooner! And Tigress? You tried to do EVERYTHING yourself! Not the best move, for a self-proclaimed winner!” Tigress says: “So I made one mistake this season, so sue me!” Bubble Bass groans, and he says: “And I'm...Sor...ree, about my behavior! I'll work on it and be better about it in the future!” Sniz says: “You have all cast your votes! As usual, the contestants who are safe, will all get normal marshmallows! But this season, the LOSER, will get the DREADED Anti-Fairy, Anti-Magic Marshmallow!” And General Barracuda appears in a haz-mat suit, and holds a purple, GLOWING marshmallow, with a pair of metal tongs!

Brittany asks: “Well, what happens if you touch an Anti-Fairy, Anti-Magic Marshmallow?!” Sniz says: “That's just it! The effects are ALWAYS random, so there's no telling WHAT might happen! Maybe something good, but PROBABLY something bad! I guess you might never know, because I'm going to bet that MOST of you aren't going to take the CHANCE of having something BAD happen to you! Anyways, it's time to reveal who will get to stay, and who will have to leave!” Bessie Higgenbottom says: “You know; my family is descended from a LONG line of marshmallow makers! We're famous for making the marshmallows called--.” And everyone else simultaneously says: “Shut UP, Bessie Higgenbottom!” Sniz says: “Thank you! Tigress, you're safe! Johnny, you're also safe! Katarra! Fee! Bubble Bass!” And Brittany and Bessie both look at each other nervously, realizing there's only ONE safe marshmallow left! Sniz says: “Contestants, this is the FINAL safe marshmallow of the evening! And the final, safe marshmallow goes to...THANKFULLY, Brittany Miller!” Brittany says: “YES!!!!” Bessie says: “WHAT?!!!” And General Barracuda THROWS the purple, Anti-Magic marshmallow at Bessie, and before she can even REACT, it LANDS in her hands, and the Anti-Magic causes her to INSTANTLY lose all her HEAD hair in an instant PUFF! Sniz says: “OOPS!!!! Guess it was something BAD, tonight!” Bessie says: “Oh, and I thought I was doing so well! I was just trying to impress you!” Tigress says: “Next time, do that with your ACTIONS, instead of your words, Miss Amy Poehler!!!!” Bessie asks: “Why does everyone always think that I SOUND like her?! I've never even MET her!”

Sniz says: “Bessie! To the Giant Slingshot of Shame!” And General Barracuda puts a safety helmet, and some safety gear on Bessie! Bessie gets strapped into the Slingshot, and says: “Wow! This is really fascinating! You know, the ORIGINAL slingshot was actually first invented, by my great-great--!” (KOING!!!!) And Bessie is hurled forwards and screams: “GREAT!!!!” Sniz says: “And with that, the Motormouth Bessie Higgenbottom is FINALLY out of the competition! Who will be the next to lose?! Which team will win the next challenge?! And how long will Johnny Krill CONTINUE to be naked?!” Johnny says: “I've got three other pairs of clothes in my suitcase, all right! Don't get your hair in a knot!” Sniz rolls his eyes, and he says: “All of these questions, and some others, may be answered, on the next episode of Total Cartoon Island Strikes Back! George Lucas, eat your heart out!” /

Episode Notes: Contestants remaining: Brittany Miller (Killer Prawn); Bubble Bass (Killer Prawn); Danny Fenton (Power Panda); Fee (Killer Prawn); Jenny Wakeman (Power Panda); Johnny Krill (Killer Prawn); Katarra (Killer Prawn); Kowalski (Power Panda); Po (Power Panda); Private (Power Panda); Rico (Power Panda); Theodore Seville (Power Panda); Tigress (Killer Prawn). / Eliminated: #14, Bessie Higgenbottom (“The Mighty B!”). /

Featured song in this episode, “All Star” by Smash Mouth, as the generic, opening theme song for this season. With Bessie's elimination, all the representatives from “The Mighty B!”; have been eliminated from this season. It is revealed that Danny Fenton's ability to 'Go Ghost', is malfunctioning, and he is now starting to channel dead celebrities, as various parts of his personality. Two of those celebrities are revealed, and they are Rodney Dangerfield, and Bette Davis. Johnny Krill becomes the team leader of the Killer Prawns, and Po becomes the team leader for the Power Pandas. It is revealed that Katarra can cause lightning bolts to randomly drop from the sky at anyone who annoys her, or, whenever she needs a good laugh. Theodore Seville develops an attraction to Brittany Miller in this episode. Blonda becomes a brand new coach for this season, starting with this episode. Cameo appearances from past contestants include Snaptrap, Spongebob, Patrick, and Larry, the latter three having JUST gotten past being under the effects of Neptune's Moon! /

Personal Notes: I think the reason why it was so hard for me to actually START this season, was I was having trouble being inspired, and coming up with something interesting and hazardous enough, to qualify as the first major obstacle, for being created by the Anti-Fairy Anti-Magic. So I actually consulted with Renegade the Unicorn, and he came up with the suggestion of the sharks to me. Originally, he suggested fire-breathing sharks with laser beams. However, it didn't make much sense for me to have the sharks breath fire, because that wouldn't make them really dangerous, since they were constantly surrounded by water, so I decided to equip them with heat-seeking missiles instead as a compromise! Ironically, I was going to DO the first part of this season, as a quick, easy way for me to burn through fourteen episodes of season four; and I think the only reason why it took me as long as it did to write the first episode of this season, was that I care WAY too much about the quality of my own writing, and I REFUSE to settle for something substandard, for my fans. If I notice that something is substandard to MY general sense of taste, than chances are, my fans are going to notice that the general quality of my work is substandard, to THEIR sense of taste as well! That's the major reason why I tried to make the first episode of this season as good as I did! As for eliminating Bessie Higgenbottom first? Personally, as far as I'm concerned; a little bit of Amy Poehler, goes a long, LONG way! And out of all the contestant, I knew the least bit about HER, compared to all the other contestants this season! That's why she got eliminated first! Hopefully, it won't take me so long to write the rest of this season! Enough said, true believers!

Edited by 4EverGreen
I wanted to put an actual episode in this space.
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Post Fiction Episode IV

Spoiler

Episode IV: Swordfight to the Death! Panic At The Disco!!"

Imposter SOF, hoping people will stop calling him a closet disco queen, heads out for a night at the disco. Not wanting to scare away any brick houses, he tearfully leaves me Mallet Of Doom™ home. He strutted along the vibrant city streets for two hours before making his entrance at the disco which was only a few blocks a way from his house, with Staying Alive by the Bee Gees playing as background music. Little does Imposter SOF know, he'll have to stay alive literally tonight.

Bouncer: Name?

Imposter SOF: WHO YU?! YOU PLASTIC?!

Imposter SOF said before banging the bouncer.

Imposter SOF: SUK IT!!SUCK TI WET!!?

And Imposter SOF proceeded to strut his way in. The bouncer got up in a daze and went to speak into his head gear.

Bouncer: He's here, Daddy.

Daddy: Its all good. All be goin aiight. Holla back at me with some money, player.

Bouncer: Yes, Daddy.

Imposter SOF was boogyin to the groove and getting funked up. He was a like a maniac, a MANIAC on the floor. He was dancing like he never danced before! Even the hep-cats were in awe at his skizzles.

Hep-Cat 1: That cat's got claws, dog.

Hep-Cat 2: Im in awe at his skizzles.

A bodacious female went up to Imposter SOF and leaned all up in his skillets. She placed herself into his arms and held on tight with her head laying on Imposter SOF's broad chest. She put her arms over his broad shoulders before sliding a finger down his pectoral.

Dancing Girl: Hello there, Tiger. Got a name?

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER OFFER??!!!

Dancing Girl: Ooh, kitty's got claws. I like that in a man. Along with pectorials such as your's.

Imposter SOF: WE DONT WANT ANY!!?!

Dancing Girl: Rawr.

The disco ball was lowered and the dance floor glittered in rainbow colors.

Dancing Girl: You're dancing with the Dancing Queen now.

They started doing the twist for about 25 minutes straight before the Dancing Queen got tired.

Dancing Queen: Thanks for the dance, honey.

Imposter SOF: YOU MAEK MEH LUK BAD!!??!!! OOGA BOOGA BOOGAH!!

And the Dancing Queen was scared off. After getting a few feet away, she too got on her ear piece.

Dancing Queen: Dont you ever make me do that again, Calvin!

Calvin: Woah baby! In this club it's Dadd-

Dancing Queen: Shut ya yap!

Calvin: K dear. Sara, honey, did he have the mallet on em? Is he packin heat??

Sara: I felt him up all over for 25 minutes. He's clean.

Calvin: Fuckin A, dear. I'll give you yo pay once this night is over.

Sara: Oohoohoo. Sounds kinkyy!

Calvin: Its supposed to be kinky.

Sara: Way to kill the mood, babe.

Meanwhile, Imposter SOF was out banging some brick houses all over the dance floor. He was like dancing, yeah! All of a sudden, the lights went out throughout the club. Smoke started to fill the place up and neon lights filled the air like clockwork. A figure was seen standing near the entrance, clad in a thick silk over coat and pimp hat. He was using a cane to walk. He slowly made his way towards the dance floor. With each step he took, a floor tile would light up in an assortment of neon colors. Nobody wanted a piece of this cool cat, since they all got out of his way as he made his way through the crowd. This guy was about six feet nine inches with those elevator boots he was sporting. Once he made his way toward the center of the dance floor, he took of his aviator shades and crushed it at the bottom of his boot. He had a Cuban cigar in his mouth, which he proceeded to swallow whole before puffing smoke into the atmosphere, damaging the ozone no doubt.

Calvin: Can you count, suckas?!

No response.

Calvin: I said, can you count?!

Guy: What comes after 69?

Calvin popped up his cane and shot the guy square in the chest, sending him flying.

Hep-Cats: Holy shit!

Hep-Cat 2: Outta sight!

Calvin: Imposter SOF! You prickly ass mofucka! Step up or step out!

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER OFFER??!!!

Calvin: How about yo dick on a silver platter? My name is That 70s Guy, you iced my boi, prepare to die.

Imposter SOF: WHO U?! U ELAST-

Before he could finish his question, 70s shot at him with his pimp cane but Imposter SOF used his cat-like reflexes to dodge roll out of the way.

70s: *cocks cane* Where you rollin off to, beatnik?!

Imposter SOF: BRING MILF FO ME LAWYER!!?!

70s: You dissin my girl now?! You're gonna bee needing a lawyer after this shit's been taken!

70s shot a few more times, missing every shot before running out of shell.

70s: Ah sheet. I wanna ice your ass honorably anyway. So I thought this through.

He turned his cane into a scimitar.

70s: Being the genius I am, You'll be packing heat as well.

70s had one of his men, who looked like Jared Padalecki, hand SOF a sword of his own.

Imposter SOF: FUCKIN S!

70s: But being the genius I am *splits his sword, revealing a dual handed scimitar* I came prepared.

Imposter SOF proceeded to split his sword, but it was just one blade so he tore the blade from it's hilt.

Imposter SOF: DUCK!!?!

70s: You outta time, baby!

70s said before leaping into the air and thrusting his swords at Imposter SOF in a downward spiral. Impost managed to dodge at the Nick of time, but got a little nicked off his ass from the force of 70s attack. Imposter SOF had no weapon at his disposal so he had to rely on his hand to hand skillets once more. He went for a four punch combo, but 70s dodged each one, using his scimitars to slash, gash, slice, and dice Imposter SOF with each attack evaded.

70s: *brings his swords outstretched to his sides* DISCO INFERNOOOOOOOOO!!!

70s engulfed himself in a ring of fire and spun around, creating a fiery inferno tornado of hellfire and brimstone over a thousand degrees Fahrenheit! It was 70s ultimate attack. He was going for the kill.

70s: I'm going for the kill!

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER FEAL??!!

70s: You iced my boy, Tvguy!

Jelly: *cameo* What a tweest! *eyes roll in circles like a jelly roll*

70s: I'll fucking chew off your balls and feed it to you!

Imposter SOF: NEVAR!!?!

Impost started running around aimlessly around the club, evading the Throwback Tornado. A lot of casualties in the process. Imposterior SOF grabbed a fire extinguisher and threw it at the heart of the tornado.

Imposter SOF: FUCK TEH FIYAH DEPARTMINT!!

An explosion of foam occured, putting a stop to the Throwback Tornado once and for all. 70s was in shock. Nobody could have the brains to outsmart him, especially not somebody like Imposter SOF. He grabbed his swords and encased them in fire before slashing and hashing and slicing and dicing at Impost like a maniac, MANIAC. Imposter SOF managed to dodge each attack before somersault kicking one of 70s scimitars out of his hands. Impost seized this opportunity and jumped up on 70s before leaping into the air to grab the sword. He gave 70s a Superman Kick to the face before landing awkwardly. It was time to boogie,

Imposter SOF: LETS NOOGIE!!

70s: Dig this, sucka!

Theybcharged at each other before locking swords. With every clash of their swords, sparks were sent flying, setting the place ablaze around them. 70s used his elevator boots to elevate himself up even higher.

70s: What now, sucka?!

Imposter SOF: TIEM TO BUT YOU DOWN TO SEIZE!!

Imposter SOF said before slashing at the boots a few hundred times, bringing 70s down to earth literally.

70s: SARA!!

Sara came flipping onto the scene before kicking Imposter SOF back a few hundred feet away, and through a brick wall.

70s: She's a Brick House!

Sara: Youre too kind, baby, You got some dirt on your face *licks her thumb* let me get that out.

70s: Baby! >.> Im trying to ice my mortal enemy!

Before she can clean 70s face, Imposter SOF came from behind a nailed her with a Double Dip with his sword, one of his signature attacks. Blood splatter all over 70s silk suit.

70s: My suit!

Sara: Calvin!

70s: Sara!

Sara: *gets thrown aside by Imposter SOF and is sent flying into the air* Calvin!

70s: SARA!

Imposter SOF: DONKEY!!? *impales 70s*

70s: *is impaled* Blughughergh *spits blood* Saragluhhergh!

Imposter SOF: YOU ARE SO FORTY EARS AGO!!?!?

70s: *gets down to his knees* Cruse you...CRUSE YOUUUUUUUUUI!!!!!

Suddenly, 70s men, who all looked like Jared Padalecki, proceeded to gang bang Imposter SOF. One of them carried 70s off, cradling him in his biceps. Imposter SOF fought off the Padaleckis by banging them all with me sword.

70s: You think you're all that! But you're nawt!!

70s cried out before making an escape in his limo. Another one of his Jareds carried Sara off as well.

Imposter SOF used his cat-like reflexes to limbo his way out of the burning disco. Once he made it out, people greeted him with applause.

Imposter SOF: YOU MAKE ME LOOK BAD!

He said before banging the paparazzi.

Meanwhile, at 70s Crib.

70s: Nobody makes a fool out of the 70s! Mark my words, sucka! I'll cap your ass harder than crayola markers! I guarantee it!!

Next Time

*a clips us shown of Imposter SOF charging towards a bunch of gun toting maniacs on horseback*

Next time on Mallet Massacre!! "Money In The Bank! The Kids Are Alright!!"

Post Fiction Episode V

Spoiler

Episode V: Unaccompanied Minors! The Kids Are Alright!!"

Imposter SOF decided to make a deposit at the bank one day, but little did he know, some shit was about to be stirred. This time, he's prepared with me Mallet of Doom™ in tow. He could take on anyone. He could take on the world.

Bank Employee: May I help you sir?

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER OFFER?!!?-

Before he could finish those exclamation points and question marks, a gun shot was heard coming from outside the bank. Suddenly, four gun toting cowpokes on horseback came stampeding into the bank, firing shots into the air and tightening their lassos.

Bank Employee: Oh my gawd! It's Jesse James The Kid! Otherwise known as Jjsthekid, leader of the Sea Minors, a gang of underage outlaws without a cause and just don't give a Fu- *is shot in the head*

Jjs was the one who pulled the trigger with his trademark six-shooter. He smirked before taking a spat into some innocent bystander's mouth. He popped more tobacco into his mouth and began to chew.

Jjs: Lemme tell my story, you dirty, little skank!

His gang aimed their guns at the bank tellers.

Jjs: Now I want y'all to put all your money into them there bags! If you choose to refuse, then I'll take this here six-shooter and blast all your damn darn brains out! If y'all pull anything funny, then you'll just have to take a six-shooter up the ass and we'll just see if you'd really like it! Now SHOW ME THE MONEY!!

The bank tellers go grab all the money from the safes and bring it all to Jjs boys. One of the tellers accidentally drop some if the cash.

Drew: *shoots into the air* Hey! Careful with the money, fool! In the economy we be in now, we ain't gonna be having much to take! Rob, check to see if the bacon's sizzling!

Rob went to go look out the window.

Rob: I ain't seein shit, compadres. Let's hope shit stays that way *shoots another bank teller* Capiche?!

Jjs: Doc, watch over the kids!

Doc: I do say, you all best not to pull anything that is quite humorous, or Im afraid I'll have to execute you quite unceremoniously.

Imposter SOF was like who the fuck were these guys. They're ruining his day already...and nobody ruins Imposter SOF's day.

Imposter SOF: *grabs me mallet and waves it in the air* YALL ARR RUINING MY SAY!!?!?

Drew: Who the fuck are you sposed to be?!

Rob: A hammer?? What the hell us that sposed to do? Bang us to death?! Bahaha!

Doc: Yes, I do say, are you supposed to think we're mere nails and you, being the one with the hammer, try to hit us?!

Jjs: *shoots Doc in the leg* Shut the fuck up, doc!

Imposter SOF raised me mallet into the air before banging the ground hard, creating a shockeave that knocked everybody off their feet and on to their asses.

Jjs: What in tarnation?!

Imposter SOF went on the attack! He targetted Doc first. Doc was an English gentlemen, who was the fastest shot in the West Coast.

Doc: How invigorating, dear boy! I accept your challenge, dear boy!

He said before unholstering his dual handed six-shooters and unloading them at Imposter SOF. Imposter dodged all the shots as he leapt into the air, much to Doc's surprise.

Doc: Poppycock!

He attempting to reload his weapons but was not fast enough to avoid Imposter SOF's Seismic Slam, causing Doc's head to assplode, splattering brain juices everywhere.

Drew: The sunna bitch done killed Doc!

Rob: You bastard!

Drew went for his Winchester Repeater but was met with a Superman Punch through the chest.

Drew: What..in the...blue blazesplurghaghgurg...

He said as he spat out blood. He died slowly as Imposter SOF tossed him of to the side.

Imposter SOF: RETURN THE SLAP!!?!!?!?

Rob: Jjs, we're getting fucked up the ass here!

Jjs: Shoot em, ya piece of shit!

They both got out their six-shooters and unloaded on Imposter SOF, who evaded the shits and dodge rolled behind the front desks. Jjs and Rob still kept shooting at the desk, looking to take out Imposter SOF. Theybstopped after about ten minutes. They looked proud of themselves.

Rob: We did good, Jesse!

Jjs: Im proud of ya, James.

Before they could embrace for a manhug, Imposter SOF grabbed hold of Rob from behind.

Imposter SOF: SURPIZE BUTSECHS!!?!

Rob: Jesse!

Jjs: Rob!

Rob: Get this varment up off me!

Jjs was reluctant to shoot after seeing how awkward they looked. It was too late, though, as Imposter SOF already had Rob caught in his patented and deadly Dread Lock!

Imposter SOF: Anaconda SQUEEZE!!

Impost said before tightening his hold and burrowing Rob down into the ground and into his grave.

Jjs: What witchcraft is this?!

Jjs said as he shot at the tiled floor. He ran out of ammo and had to fight the rest of this battle alone.

Jjs: Looks like I gotta fight the rest of this battle alone.

Suddenly, Imposter SOF drilled out from underneath Jjs, drilling The Kid in half up the ass and down the middle.

Imposter SOF: *waving me mallet in the air* I HAVE THE POWDER!!?

Imposter SOF said before banging everyone in the bank with me mallet.

Meanwhile, on the wrong side of the tracks.

Spongebobiscool: Yo Daddy-os where the hell are them Sea Miners?!

A figure covered in darkness was applauding in the darkness.

Figure: It appears the Sea Minors met an untimely end. A shame really. They still had their uses.

Spongebobiscool: What?

Figure: Inposter SOF is exceeding even my expectations. I never expected such results this fast.

Spongebobiscool: Whatchu talking bout?

Figure: Ah, my simple-minded manservant. All shall be revealed in time, in time. Mua. Muahahaha. Muahahahahaha!

Spongebobiscool: Whoahoho there! Evil laughter, not cool.

Figure: You deserve a round of applause!

They all start clapping uncontrollably.

Next Time

*Imposter SOF is shown charging at a mechanicale snake*

Narrator: Next Time: "Copperhead Caper! A Truth Revealed To Imposter SOF!!"

Post Fiction Episode VI

Spoiler

Episode VI: "Copperhead Caper! A Truth Revealed To Imposter SOF!"

Imposter SOF decided to go the park one day to get some exercise. With me Mallet of Doom in hand, he proceeds to bang everything that moves. In the distance, though laid an underlying danger. A menace to society kknown only as Luke and Metal Snake. He looked on as Imposter SOF had his bang session, smiling at the events unfolding before him. To his right was his right-hand man, Sabresponge, the most skilled medical technician and chi practitioner this side of the Mississippi.

Metal Snake: Do you see what I see?

Sabresponge: An imposter.

Metal Snake: Yesss. An impossster who wieldsss the legendary Mallet of Doom™. Sssabre, I mussst acquire that for my collection.

Sabre: But Lord Metal Snake, that imposter managed to single-handedly massacre the Sea Minor gang and 70s and tvguy before them.

Metal Snake: Those fools flaunt their power like simple children with a new toy. Those fools lack patience and discipline. The bigger you are, the harder you fall, and they definitely fell hard. The imposter holds unbelievable power, killing him and taking his precious mallet as a trinket will get people to take me seriously. Take both of us seriously!

Sabresponge: Excellent plan, Lord Metal Snake!

Metal Snake: You know what you must do. Only intervene when absolutely necessary.

Sabresponge: Yes, my lord.

Metal Snake disappeared in a flash.

Imposter SOF: *bangs woman with me mallet* YOU LOOK PRETTY IN DRESS BUT LOOK BETTER ON FLOOR!!?!

Suddenly a snake popped out of the woman's vagina as it attempted to bite Imposter SOF, but he managed to bang it before it could do damage.

Metal Snake: It's true what they say. Your reflexes, they're almossst...cat-like.

Imposter SOF: WHO U??! YOU ELASTIC!!?

Metal Snake: On the contrary, I am quite the opposite. They call me...Metal Snake.

Imposter SOF: *gasps* SHE WHO MUST NOT BE MAMED!!

Metal Snake: Yes, a worthy adversary to awesome prowess. Unlike the fodder you have become so accustomed to, I think before I take action. That is what makes me deadly. That is what makes me a threat to everyone, even you!

Snake said as he moved towards Imposter SOF with the speed and flexibility of a snake. He dealt Imposter SOF a three-hit combo before recoiling. His eyes were like a snake's. He had only slits for a nose. His skin was scale-like. Metal Snake was a true freak of nature. His smirk revealed the venomous fangs he hid in his mouth. He had long flowing black hair. He was concealed in a black cloak. Imposter SOF, himself, was a bit shaken by this new adversary, but he never let that intimidate him.

Imposter SOF: ILL NEVAR BET YOU INTIMIDATE ME!!?!

Metal Snake: Adversaries all the way to the end! Let us fight!

Snake said as he spat out a katana sword from his esophagus. He slithered his way to Imposter SOF and took a swing. Impost managed to block his strikes and thrusts with me mallet, which refused to break at the force of the sword.

Metal Snake: That mallet is truly a work if art. A work if art I must acquire for myself.

Imposter SOF: NEVAR!??!?!!?

Impost shouted as he proceeded to bang at Snake's sword with me mallet. Snake was fought back into a corner, he was on the losing edge at this point. He thought of a new strategy quick. He proceeded to jump right out of his skin, shedding his old one and leaping behind Imposter SOF during the confusion. He had his sword at his back. He was bare naked. He was now on the edge of glory.

Metal Snake. Elementary. Looks like another one shall bite the dust.

Impost thought as quickly as his mind could handle. He needed an exit strategy. He stomped on Metal Snake's foot, throwing the snake off guard and prone to an attack. Imposter SOF proceeded to nail him with a Bang Barrage courtesy of me mallet, another one of Imposter SOF's signature manuevers. Metal Snake was knocked back to his stomach. With his back facing at him, Imposter SOF proceeded to clutch Metal Snake into his patented and deadly Dread Lock! He proceeded to constrict his body onto Metal Snake's bare skin, breaking away at his bones.

Imposter SOF: WHO U!!? HOW U NOW ME??!

Metal Snake: Who would know anything...about...an imposter?

Imposter SOF: WHO IMPOSTER ME!!?

Metal Snake: No, you ignoramous. You ARE the imposter!

Imposter SOF: I CANT BE!! THAT'S IMPISSIBLE!!

Metal Snake: Believe-Believe it... you are absolutely no one! Created...to live life a lie! Your name has the word "Imposter" in it! You are nobody! An even bigger nobody than ME! Than everyone else!

Imposter SOF: YOU BASTARD!!

Imposter SOF went for the death roll, but Sabresponge blasted him with a chi blast just in time, knocking Imposter SOF off of Metal Snake.

Sabresponge: Lord Metal Snake! Are you alright?! Can you hear me?!

Metal Snake: Take me and flee! Let's leave this imposter to face his reality.

Sabresponge: As you wish, my lord.

Sabresponge said before grabbing Metal Snake and running away with him in his arms. Imposter SOF now had to come to terms with the harsh reality that he was a nobody. In a world where he's alone. Who created him and what was their purpose? Those were the questions that weren't on Imposter SOF's mind. He grabbed me mallet and went back home to find out what time Phineas and Ferb is on.

Meanwhile, in the Underground City.

Sabresponge: We have made it back, my lord.

Metal Snake: Funny, I too am puzzled as to why he was created. But he has something that I desire so dear. The Mallet of Doom™ will be mine. I swear it. It is only rightfully so. A weapon such as that deserves to be held in much more suitable handsss.

Sabresponge: Would you like tour spongebath now, my Lord?

Metal Snake: So be it. That mallet...it's power. Will all soon.. Be...mine.

Metal Snake hissed as he got into his bathtub.

Next Time

*a clip is shown of Imposter SOF fighting back against disk jockey*

Narrator: Next Time! "Hustle and Flow! The DJ Hero rises!!*

I know this was a confusing episode, so if you're confused and have questions. Feel free to PM me!

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Post Fiction Episode VII

Spoiler

Episode VII: "Trouble In Paradise! What Would John Wayne Do?!"

Imposter SOf went for a day out in the Community. He had me mallet in his hand as he began to ponder the revelation revealed to him in the previous episode. Who created him for what sick and twisted purpose? As he dealt with his identity crisis, he paid a visit to the local Guests' Paradise hotel, a place where guests of the Community would stay and hang out and get raped by the members of the Community. Imposter SOF rolled on up in there and proceeded to bang any guest he could find with me mallet. Imposter SOF noticed that something was wrong here.

Imposter SOF: SUMTHINGS WONG HERE!!!?!

He scoured the Paradise hotel but there wasn't another soul. Suddenly another guest came logging in through the front lobby. Imposter SOF flew into the air and banged the guest into the ground.

Imposter SOF: WATS WONG HERE??!?!!?

The guest turned onto his back, it was LAT.

LAT: DAMMIT DALE!

Imposter SOF: QHO U?! U ELASTIC!!?

LAT: DAMMIT HE GOT DALE!

Imposter SOF: WHO GOT EM!?

LAT: *points to the Lobby* There.

Imposter SOF let LAT off easy and allowed him to log on off. He tightened the grip on me mallet before heading towards the Lobby. Once in the Lobby, the sound of a shrieking man was heard throughout the place. Another man was yelling at him. In the distance, was a large platform constructed out of ply wood and other items that were found in the expanding hotel. As Imposter SOF got closer, it became apparent that hanging by braided ropes in the form of nooses, there bodies of many guests hanging from the sides of the platform. The platform was actually a makeshift gallows, and guests were being hung out to dry. At the top of the gallows, a man stood at the edge with a noose around his neck. Behind him appeared to be one of the community's higher ranking officers, or moderator. Imposter SOF knew this rogue mod. He was dressed in a sheriff's uniform complete with badge, 10 gallon hat, and lasso. He looked dirty as he spat out some chewed tobacco.

Dale: Please mister! We only came here looking to take a dip in the pool!

Teenj: Skinny dippin, eh?! That's against the rules!

Dale: I didn't say anything like that!

Teenj: That's exactly what those sunnabitches say when they refused to follow the rules!

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER OFFER??!!

Teenj: *perplexed* Who the hell you supposed to be?! You dare question my methods, son?! Well you ain't got the badge, now do ya?! I DO!! I think once and act twice! You think Im gonna take shit from a piece of shit like you?! Not no way, not no how! Not anymore! I'm the big man now! What I say goes! You respect my word and when I say dance, YOU DANCE!

Teenj proceeded to kick Dale off the scaffolding, causing the rope to snap his neck from the force of the fall. Imposter SOF simply looked on in shock. Teenj started doing the Texas two-step.

Teenj: Soooooeeeee!!! Piggy! Piggy! PIGGY!!

Teenj yelled out before leaping off the makeshift gallows and onto level ground with Imposter SOF. Imposter SOF assumed his battle stance as Teenj reached for his blunderbuss. Teenj fired a huge blast at Imposter SOF's direct, but Impost manage to deflect it by banging the ammo with me mallet in mid-air.

Teenj: You were the one aintcha?! You were the sunnabitch who took out the Sea Minors, didntcha?!

Imposter SOF: STOOPID DAWG!!

Teenj: Cause of you, I got posted in this nowhere hick place! Skinning your hide will be sweeter than biscuits and gravey!

Teenj vowed as fire more shot at Impost. Imposter SOF managed to avoid the huge blasts by dodge rolling in the Nick of time. Teenj realized he was out of ammo.

Teenj: Dagnabbit! Outta ammo!

He tossed the blunderbuss aside and pulled out his lasso of truth. He twirled it in the air for a good 10 minutes before tossing it at Imposter SOF. He had Impost caught up in his lasso of truth.

Teenj: Now when I say dance, you dance!

Teenj tightened the hold on the rope, squeezing the air out Inposter SOF and causing him to dance.

Teenj: You ain't ousting me from my post this time, boy! Now talk! Were you the one who took out them Sea Minors?!

Imposter SOF was losing breath. He had no choice but to talk.

Imposter SOF: NEVAR!!??!

Teenj: What in the bayou?? Talk!

Teenj pulled on it even tighter. Imposter SOF began losing conciousness.

Imposter SOF: K GAWD DAMN IT! I DID IT!!

Teenj: That's all I need to hear. Any last words?

Suddenly, sirens were blazing outside the hotel. Teenj started quivering in his cowboy boots. His grip loosened on the rope. This was Imposter SOF's chance.

Imposter SOF: YOU MAKE ME LOOK BAD!!?!

Imposter SOF said as banged me Mallet of Doom™ down against the rope snapping. He powered his out of the lasso that was around him.

Imposter SOF: BRING MILK FOR ME LAWYER!!

Teenj: What in tarnation!

They engaged in hand to combat, with Teenj dodging a Superman Punch attempt. Teenj nailed Impost with a three-hit combo, knocking Imposter SOF back a foot or two. Teenj then nailed him with his built in Sonic Cannon, sending Imposter SOF flying through a wall.

Teenj: I got the sonic if you got the boom.

Teenj snidely said as he tossed a birdarang at Imposter SOF. Before the birdarang could connect, he fired out another Sonic Cannon, looking to finish Imposter SOF off with his trademark Sonic Boom™. Imposter SOF caught on to the attack and took it like the man he is.

Teenj: Pigs in a blanket.

When the smoke cleared, Imposter SOF was revealed to still be standing tall, although he was heavily battle damaged by the attack.

Impster SOF: OOGA BOOGA BOOGA!

Impost shouted out as he charged towards Teenj, dodging all the Star Bolts he was firing at him. With me mallet in hand, he nailed Teenj with a Double Sunday, bring Teenj down to the ground. He went to finish him off with a Saturday Crush, but stopped himself as the Community Peace Keepers came storming in, armed with high-tech assault rifles. They pushed Imposter SOF off to the side as they proceeded to apprehend Teenj. The captain of the force approached Imposter SOF, with a look of approval on his face.

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER OFFER??!

Sponge Sebastian: The name's Sponge Sebastian. I'm the captain in charge of this unit. Look, you handled yourself good, real good.

Imposter SOF:...THE NEST.

Sponge Sebastian: The department could use someone like you.

Imposter SOF: WE DONT WANT ANY!!?!??!?!

Sponge Sebastian: Just say the word and my department would be proud to have you.

Imposter SOF: SUK IT! SUK IT WET!

Imposter SOF said before storming off with me mallet. Sponge Seb shrugged it off and proceeded to take Teenj in.

Sponge Sebastian: Teenj, I'm really disappointed in you.

Teenj: Meh.

LAT: *underneath Dale's hanging corpse* DAMNIT DALE! I came as soon as the police were sure that you were dead!

Meanwhile, later that night at the precinct.

Teenj was in his cell with nothing but a blank expression on his face. He was stripped of his mod power at this point. A guard came in.

Guard: You have a visitor.

He escorted Teenj to the visitor center where a man waited, sitting calmly behind the glass with the phone in hand. He was dressed casually. Teenj took a sat and grabbed the phone on his side and put it to his ear.

Teenj: Hello, Dragiiin.

Dragiiin: Did you wring anything out of the guests?

Teenj: Bastards ain't know jack shit.

Dragiiin: Fuckers. Fuck all of them. But you, my friend, I am disappoint. What the fuck happened in there?

Teenj: This guy, Imposter SOF, he came in and fucked shit up. He also said he was the one who took out the Sea Minors and cost me my damn job!

Dragiiin: Fuck your job. You're working with me now, and you're not doing a very good job at it.

Teenj: Gimme a chance. Now that I know what we're up against, I'll be ready next time.

Dragiiin: Fuck you mang. You had your chance. I already have Spongebobiscool and his boys breathing down my neck about the whole bank thing. Now here you are, acting like a dumbass and failing to do something that is so God damn motherfucking simple! You disappoint me. This...Imposter SOF is dabbling his hands where they don't belong. But Imma gonna deal with him, I can guarantee you that.

Teenj: What about my situation?

Dragiiin: I think it's time to cut the chord on this little partnership. Don't drop the soap, limp dick.

Dragiiin said before leaving Teenj to his fate.

Next Time

*a clip is shown of Imposter SOF fighting off a gang of greasers on the other side of the train tracks*

Narrator: Next Time! "Grease Lightnin'! Rumble In Brighton Tonight!!"

Post Fiction Episode VIII

Spoiler

Episode VIII: "Grease Lightnin! Rumble In Brighton Tonight!!"

Imposter SOF was still making his way from the Guests' Paradise Inn from the previous episode. He was drained of most of his energy from his fight with Teenj. With me Mallet of Doom™ in hand, Imposter SOF followed the old tran tracks home, walking past an old, abandoned trainyard. The sun was setting and it was getting increasingly dark as minutes wents by. Imposter SOF still looked battle damaged and bruised from his previous fight. He couldn't help but feel that he was being watched so he threw me mallet into the sky.

Imposter SOF: TAKE DAT YOU FICKIN ALIEMS!!?!

He shouted out before catching me mallet a few minutes afterward. He continued on his way home. But unknown to him, a new enemy will emerge.

Meanwhile, at the wrong side of the tracks.

Figure: It has come to my attention that one of Dragiiin's boys got hit with the ban hammer. Hard.

Spongebobiscool: Yeah butchu know how the word on the streets go.

Figure: Imposter SOF is growing stronger with each battle. He has really been exceeding my expectations.

Spongebobiscool: Butchu know, he still ain't the real deal. Not legit.

Figure: My feeble-minded man slave. He may not be the genuine article, but he is reaching a level that exceeds even the original. I started realizing that through his battles with tvguy and 70s. Perhaps soon, I can finally put my plan into action.

Spongebobiscool: Tvguy cannot be dead, could he? I mean, sure he's thebrunt of the little but he's still one of the golden boys here. No way Imposter SOF coulda had wasted em.

Figure: When tvguy fired his last attack at Imposter SOF, Imposter SOF managed to block it by using the Mallet of Doom™ as a makeshift shield. When the blast connected to the mallet, it absorbed the force of the blast, channeling that energy throughout itself. Seeing as how it was tvguy's own power that supplied that energy, what Imposter SOF did with that energy after was more than enough to kill tvguy on contact.

Spongebobiscool: Damn man, you know those typa words confuse the hell outta me, Daddy-O!

Figure: What really impressed me was the fight with 70s. I mean, sure that idiot throwback has lost a beat or two throughout the years, but Imposter SOF still managed to fight him on leveled ground.

Spongebobiscool: What about Jjs?

Figure: Trust me, he's still alive.

Spongebobiscool: The fuck you say?

Figure: He simply laid out a decoy. Pretty generic, but he's still alive. There ain't no way someone like him could had been taken out that easily, nit even by Imposter SOF.

Spongebobiscool: This is fucking surreal.

Suddenly, the sound of a door opening and closing was heard. Out from the shadows, another figure emerged into the light, revealing himself to be Jjsthekid!

Figure: Glad to see you actually made it back in one piece.

Jjs: Hardy fuckin har!

Spongebobiscool: Whoahohoho! Leavin me outta da loop, not cool.

Jjs: STFU sbiscool.

Figure: Nobody tells him to STFU but me.

Spongebobiscool: Yeah, besides, where the money you promised?

Jjs: Not here obviously.

Spongebobiscool: Not what I wanna hear. You know Drag has been breathin down my neck cause of you? If this business relationship is supposed to work, you need to start doing as you're told.

Jjs: Look, I'll get you both your doubloons. I just need time.

Spongebobiscool: Yeah, tell that to Dragiiin. The fucking maniac is gonna sink his teeth into me cause of this.

Jjs: Stop being such a damn pussy and be fucking cool for once!

Figure: Gentleman, could you take you little squabble elsewhere. I have business to discuss with Mr. iscool.

Jjs: Fine. But FYI, the mallet maniac is right outside the station. He threw his hammer into the air and said something about aliens or whatever.

Figure: What? How?

Jjs: I tailed him here.

Spongebobiscool: The bastard cost me some bread. Jjs, take care of it.

Jjs: *leaving* Nah, I'm not being paid nearly enough for this.

Spongebobiscool: But the wimp took your boys out! An eye for an eye, right?

Jjs: It don't matter to me, that bot and those idiots were expendable anyhow. Good luck.

Spongebobiscool: Fuckin sellout. I'll take the bastard out myself. He's cost me too much damn bread.

Figure: I advise against doing that.

Spongebobiscool: Look, I can't even tell who the hell you're supposed to be, so screw you and screw you cause! That shit's over.

Figure: You'll regret it.

Spongebobiscool already made his way out of the building he gathered a few of his goons and all got into a hot rod. They peeled out, burning rubber on the pavement. Accompanying him was Spongedude, a surf bum wielding a surfboard. To the left of him was SBRoxMan, the biggest and strongest of the group. Riding shotgun was William Leonard, preppy rich kid armed with daddy's high powered pistol. In the back was Savannah Squarepants, sbiscool's candy girl armed with a Tommy Gun. Sbiscool was revving it 50 mph towards Imposter SOF's direction. Imposter SOF was in their sights. It was time to go in for the kill.

Spongebobiscool: Time to go in for the kill. Fuck em up, dude.

Spongedude grabbed his surfboard and stood up as the hot rod sped up towards Impost. Rockabilly music was booming from the built in jukebox. Imposter SOF began to notice the light from the headlights that was becoming more strong as they approached from behin. He looked back and caught a glimpse of his attackers. He quickly dodge rolled out of the way right when Spongedude swung his board at him, looking for a one-hit kill.

SBRoxMan: You missed loser!

William Leonard: Get your aim right, brother!

Spongebobiscool: Fucking wimp.

Savannah Squarepants: *points at Imposter SOF* Look! He's over there, baby!

Spongedude: Ahahahahallllriiiight!

Spongebobiscool: *Revs up and peels out* Here we go!

They started speeding their way towards Imposter SOF again. His energy was depleting due to his wounds. He decided to take a stand and raised me mallet over his head, gathering whatever energy he could muster for one shot. Right as they were about to run right into him, he brought me mallet down on to the hood of the hot rod with a Seismic Slam, causing the vehicle to assplode. Debris was flying to the earth everywhere in a fiery shower. Before Impost could have any sort of celebration, five figures emerged from the fiery wreckage. Sbiscool and his boys survived relatively unscathed.

Imposter SOF: DUCK ME!!

Spongebobiscool: *pulls out his switchblade* You'll be fucked up in more ways than one once we're finished with ya. You see, you fucked up a little transaction I had going on at the bank. Now, I'm lookin for some backpay-

imposter SOF: WHATS YER OFFER?!!!?!?!!

Spongebobiscool: Shut up! Or should I say payback! Bag em and gag em, boys!

Imposter SOF: LETSA HO!!?!

Sbiscool's goons spread out along the battlefield, surrounding Imposter SOF. Spongedude came after him with his blunt surfboard and swung at him like crazy. Imposter SOF managed to block each hit single-handedly before banging him away with me mallet. SBRoxMan came and grabbed him from behind, locking him in a bear hug. William Leonard stepped in front of them with his pistol in hand, aiming it at Imposter SOF. He took a shot, but Impost moved his head away from the path of the bullet, which ended up hitting SBRox in the chest. The pain from the shot was enough to get him to let go of his grip over Imposter SOF. Leonard took another shot, but Imposter SOF managed to muster up the energy to leap into the air, evading the bullet which nailed SBRox again. Savannah fired her shots into the air in an attempt to kill Impost mid-flight but failed to hit him before having to reload. Imposter SOF attempted to bang Leonard with a Seismic Slam as he made his landing but Leonard quickly made it out of the way in time, leaving Impost nothing but solid ground. Spongedude came at him again. His surfboard locked with me mallet, creating sparks. SBRox came from behind and nailed Impost with a Super Sucker Punch, sending him flying a few hundred feet. Savannah took potshots again, with Imposter SOF dodge rolling out of the way. William Leonard leapt in front of Impost, and being a Golden Glove recipient, engaged Imposter SOF in hand to hand combat by disarming him of me Mallet of Doom™.

William Leonard: Put em up, pauper!

Leonard said before assuming his southpaw position. He gave Impost a few jabs and left hooks. Imposter SOF fought back with a five-hit combo, causing Leonard to bust his lip and left eyebrow. They connect with simultaneous blows, sending them both back flying. SBRox caught Imposter SOF and nailed him with a thunderous Spine Buster against the train tracks. Savannah approached Imposter SOF with a sinister smirk on her face, ready for the kill by cocking her Tommy Gun but before she could finish him off.

Spongebobiscool: HOLD IT!

Sbiscool shouted, approaching the battle-weary imposter. He took his switchblade out.

Spongebobiscool: He's mine. Pick em up!

SBRox brought Imposter SOF back to his feet and shoved him towards Sbiscool, who shanked him as he came. Sbiscool proceeded to beat Imposter SOF to a pulp.

Spongebobiscool: Any last words?

Imposter SOF: B-BRING MILK-K...FOR....ME LAWYER!!?!??!??!?!?????!!!!

Imposter SOF responded before uppercutting sbiscool into the air. He quickly leapt up into the air and grabbed sbiscool mid-air before piledriving him straight into the ground. Cool's goons were in shock before surrounding Imposter SOF in a square. They attempted to finish Impost off with a team attack, but out of nowhere, a clap was heard booming throughout the area. Imposter braced for the attack but it never came to be. The four goons were down on the ground for the count motionless. Imposter SOF was shocked for he had done nothing to harm them. He looked around the area and peered into the nearby train station. He caught a glimpse of a man in a long flowing trench coat and business suit. Imposter SOF rubbed his eyes to see if his eyes wasn't playing tricks on him, but when he looked back the man was not there. Imposter SOF retrieved me mallet before storming back home.

Meanwhile, back at the wrong side of the tracks.

Figure: So, how was your time? Delightful, I hope.

Spongebobiscool: *bandaged up* The fucking wimp blind sided me and wasted my boys by the time I came to!

Figure: Yes, quite. But perhaps there was more than what meets the eye.

Spongebobiscool: The fuck that's sposed to mean?

Figure: Nothing, at the moment.

Spongebobiscool: Ahhh you and your stinkin metaphors.

Next Time

*A clip is shown of Imposter SOF colliding with a masked man*

Narrator: Next Time! "The Face Of Evil! The Greatest In KORIDIE!!"

Post Fiction Episode IX

Spoiler

Episode IX: "The Face Of Evil! The Greatest In KORIDIE!!"

Imposter SOF went downtown one day to buy some Phineas & Ferb episode on DVD. He was feeling much since our last episode since he has healed up all his wounds. With me Mallet of Doom in hand, Imposter SOF felt invincible once more. With all the shit that's been going down the past couple of episodes, you would think Imposter SOF would expect the unexpected by now. As usual, he remains oblivious to the danger that is to come.

Imposter SOF: STEPPIN ON TEH BITCH!! DOO DOO DEE DOO DOO!! STEPPIN ON THE BEETCH!! DOOBA DEE DOO DOO!!!?!?

He took a left on the corner of Glove World and Sharing where he saw a police stand-off. Community Peace Keepers were lined up with their guns aiming toward the Sharing Time Luxury Condos, a place that houses most of the more well known VIPs of the community. Commanding the squad of peace keepers were their Moderator, Sponge Sebastian. Sebastian took notice of Imposter SOF and approached him.

Sponge Seb: Name and rank, soldier!

Imposter SOF: WHO U!!??!???? U ELASTIC!!??!?!!

Sponge Seb: It's Sponge Seb, dude. Anyways, I like your style kid-

Imposter SOF: IM OLDER THAN U!!!??!!??!

Sponge Seb: I like how you handled yourself with Teenj. You went in there and really took charge of things, like a real pro. Anyways, we have ourselves a little hostage situation going on here and negotiating is getting us nowhere because here in the Community we don't negotiate with these trolls.

Imposter SOF: TRILLS??!

Sponge Seb: You know, criminals and low lives. They can't find anything to do with their lives that's productive so they take it out and innocent people for the lulz. Anyways, we have reason to believe that that's what we're dealing with here. Seeing as how well you handled yourself with Teenj, I'm gonna throw you a bone here. My boys and I have the perimeter here safe and secured. SOF, I need your skillets here, bad. Especially if we want to save lives here.

Imposter SOF: WHATS YER IFFER!!?

Sponge Seb: You like Phineas & Ferb? How would you like a drawing of them and colored?

To Imposter SOF, that was payment enough. He clutched me mallet tightly and adjusted his hat Ash Ketchum-style before charging in.

Sponge Seb: Dumbass.

Imposter SOF entered the main lobby. The place seemed empty and cleared out. He approached the elevator and pressed the button to go up. He decided to scout the place out from the bottom up. The first floor led to Old Man Jenkins' condo. It was well-kept and had an indoor pool. It smelled like hemp. He had a weapons cache hidden in his closet. These weapons were the real deal, as if he was ready to go to war. There appeared to be nothing of interest here so Imposter SOF continued on his way. After going through a few floors and condos full of depressing things, he made his way up to Face's place.

Imposter SOF: ALL THAT DEPRESSING SKIT MAKES ME WANNA GO BANG MAHSELF!!

Face's room was a mess and all torn up, as if it was ran shackled. The pictures on the wall were all broken as well as all the mirrors in the place. This was a place of interest. When he left the room, Imposter SOF noticed something at the corner of his eye, down the hall. He turned to look and caught a glimpse of a casually dressed man in dark clothes and black leather jacket with a hood. He had a black bandana around his face, concealing it. When he noticed Imposter SOF, he put the hood of his jacket over his head and made his way up the stairwell. Imposter SOF gave chase. When he reached the floor above, he stormed into the condo and came upon a man who was rambling to himself. The room was filled with movies that nobody has heard of. The walls were covered in Butthole Surfers posters and memorabilia. The tv was on, playing Fritz the Cat.

Imposter SOF: WHO U!!??!? U PLASTIC!!?

Elastic: Elastic is the name actually.

Imposter SOF's eyes widened at Elastic's words. He was finally face to face with Elastic.

Elastic: You look familiar. I know you from somewhere?

Imposter SOF: YOUUUUUU!!

Suddenly, Elastic's bed came to life and started to attack Imposter SOF with its sheets.

Elastic: Death Bed! The bed that kills!

Elastic yelled out before focusing back to Fritz the Cat. Imposter SOF dodged the bed's whip attacks before banging me mallet against the mattress with his patented Seismic Slam. The bed shrieked in pain before it was engulfed a in black substance with a red glow. When it cleared out, the bed turned into the masked man that Imposter SOF was chasing from earlier. The stared intently at Impost as Elastic stared intently at the Fritz scene unfolding on his tv screen.

Imposter SOF: WHO U!!? U-

Elastic: I'm right here, you know.

Masked Man: They call me...Face.

Elastic: I could had guessed that. It's in the episode title.

Face: Look, I don't want any trouble. I have too much shit on my plate to deal with this shit right now!

Imposter SOF disregarded this and pounced at Face and swung at him with me mallet with all me might. Face dodged all his wings and transformed his right arm into a razor sharp sword blade.

Imposter SOF: YOU MALE ME LOOK BAD!!

They clashed with their respective weapons. With each time their weapons clashed, sparks were sent flying. They battled all throughout the room as Elastic continued to watch his movies. Imposter SOF tackled Face through the door and out of the room. Impost land on top of Face, who proceeded to kick him off and sent him flying away. Face kipped up and leapt into the air to impale Imposter SOF with his arm blade. Impost rolled outbid the way in the Nick of time. Face had his blade jammed into the floor, prompting to contort his limb, ripping it out of the ground and transforming his arm into a wrecking ball made out of the floor his arm was jammed in. He used it to nail Imposter SOF with a solid left hook that sent Imposter SOF flying up five whole floors. Face gave chase and caught him before ramming Imposter SOF against the wall.

Face: God damn it I warned you! I didn't want to do this, but you give me little to no choice.

He raised his boulder fist for the kill, but shots began firing through the windows, interrupting his death blow. The Peace Keepers outside had a good shot and took their chance. This prompted Face to drop Imposter SOF down and make a hasty escape. Imposter SOF grabbed me mallet and gave chase, tailing him down the hall and out the 10th story window. Face used his mysterious powers to enshroud himself in a dark black/red fog that allowed him to glide through the city and its skyscrapers. Imposter SOF had no such ability so he plummeted to the pavement, but was saved at the last moment by an invisible hand. Sponge Seb and his men fired their assault rifles into the air in an attempt to shoot Face down, but he eluded their gun fire and disappeared amongst the buildings.

Sponge Seb: Damn it all! How am I supposed to explain this to HQ? Alright boys, pack it up! We're going on a manhunt.

One of his men approached.

CDCB: How exactly are we supposed to explain this to the superiors, to the public? Surely there will be civil unrest. People would want answers.

Sponge Seb: Simple. We do what we always do. Pin the blame on WhaleBlubber.

CDCB: I see.

Sponge Seb went to go find Imposter SOF, who was still puzzled at who saved him from certain death. He looked around his surroundings and caught a glimpse of the trench coat man once again, staring at him from an alleyway. Imposter SOF grabbed me mallet and chased after him. The man turned down the alley and turned left at the corner. When Imposter SOF turned the corner and caught up, the man was gone. A hand patted his shoulder from behind.

Sponge Seb: Looks like our guy got away. Can't say I'm pleased at the moment but atleast you tried. I have to go report to HQ. Don't lose your head over this. We'll get Blubber eventually.

Imposter SOF: BUT HE SED HIS NAME WAD FAVE!!?

Sponge Seb: What?! That's just WB's mind games, that's how he plays with your head. Which is why I need to bring him to justice eventually. Just relax and give time to yourself to clear your thoughts. I'll get you that drawing I owe.

Sponge Seb said as he led Impost out of the alley. Imposter SOF took another glance behind to make sure no one was there. From the distance, on top of one of the buildings, the man stared down at Imposter SOF with his trenchcoat bellowing and flowing in the wind. A smirk curled upon his face as the scene faded to black.

Meanwhile, back at HQ.

Sponge Sebastian entered a huge office, littered with medical supplies. He approached a desk and took a seat in front of it.

Sponge Sebastian: Mr. Dr. Professor Patrick, we failed to capture the test subject.

Mr. Dr. Professor Patrick: I can't say that I'm pleased with these results, Seb. You promised me a body.

Sponge Sebastian: But the subject only escaped with help from someone else, sir.

Mr. Dr. Professor Patrick: *turns around on his chair* An accomplice, you say?Who?

Sponge Sebastian: Sponge Odd Fan, sir.

Mr. Dr. Professor: Impossible. He died a long time ago. Unless...Yes, yes. That must be it.

Sponge Sebastian: I'm afraid I'm not following.

Mr. Dr. Professor: 70s told me about this but I thought he was blabbing on once again about drivel. Perhaps he wasn't blabbing after all.

Sponge Sebastian: Sir?

From outside the office, the man in the trenchcoat looked on from the shadows of the hallway. He continued to listen in on their convo as the scene once again fades to black.

Next Time!!

*a clips is shown of Imposter SOF fighting off fire breathing gunmen*

Narrator: Next time! "Enter The Dragiiin! A Life Or Death Battle Commences!!"

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MermaidMan: The Brave and the Bold Season 3

 

41. A Frozen Discovery : In the opening, MermaidMan and Rider team up to stop Vortex from stealing money from a bank and getting away in a portal. Rider chases him through the portal with his bike and attacks. MermaidMan punches Vortex, and he falls and drops the money. They grab it and get out.

 

In the plot, Freeze wants revenge on MermaidMan and goes after him! MermaidMan and Miss Appear are talking, and Freeze throws some ice. MermaidMan slips. Wondering what that was about, he sees a blue crystal. It's Freeze! He says, "Hello MermaidMan. Long time no see." He throws some ice at him, and it freezes him! Sandy karate chops him, and Freeze says, "I am ready to take my revenge! We were once friends, and you refused to do evil!" MermaidMan gets free and uses Water-Blast on him. He explains to Sandy that he and Freeze used to work together, but he started abusing his powers, and he quit the team. MermaidMan punches him, and Freeze throws a lot of ice and freezes Sandy. MermaidMan punches him, and he says, "I guess we will end this battle short, old friend." He escapes, but MermaidMan knows that he will return. He rescues Sandy. Meanwhile, Freeze heads out to sea and lands at an iceberg. He enters his HQ and starts planning...

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