Jjs Goodman Posted October 10 Posted October 10 Happy Octerror, ghouls and any other creatures of the night. This topic is a good chance for you to share your own hauntingly creative talents with others. Our annual Scary Story contest is back for the final time! Rules: 1.) The story does not have to be SpongeBob related, but it can be if you want. It doesn't matter to us. 2.) It must at least have a Halloween or creepy theme. Just post your story here, and a panel of supernatural judges (Trophy, DG and sbl) will judge who has the best one. The winner will receive... 1,000 ghostly doubloons 20 pieces of candy 200 experience points Now get writing! You have until October 30th at 11:59pm ET to submit. There will be no more Scary Story contests after this one, so try to go out with a bang if you dare.
Meko1432 Posted October 11 Posted October 11 a slightly modified little short i made for another forum now with SBC usernames! The Polite Ghost: An SBC Story The short begins with the SBC Gang hanging out at SBC Headquarters (JJs, Cha, SOF, and SB&P). All of them look bored. JJs looks at Cha across the room repeatedly throwing a plastic ball towards the wall then proceeding to catch it JJs: What're you doing? Cha: Wall Ball. JJs: Wall Ball? Cha responds while her full focus is on the bouncing ball Cha: Wall Ball. SOF: You guys wanna go out for ice cream? SB&P: I just ate SOF: I was talking to both Cha and JJs, not you. SB&P: oh... JJs: i could go for some ice cream. Cha, you comin'? Cha: cant come. playing. wall ball. [slowly] She throws the plastic ball a bit too hard, causing the Wall Ball to bounce from the wall towards the window, and thus breaking it. SOF: you coming now? Cha: Sure... She again responds with her focus, not on SOF but on the broken window. She's trying to figure out where the wall-ball might've bounced to. Cha: i actually do know a really good ice cream place JJs: Alrighty, then! Let's go! Cut to them infront of the ice cream place Everything is going quite normally until Cha walks towards the front door and it opens automatically. She pays no mind to it. SOF and JJs, who were standing right behind Cha as she went in, are puzzled by what they just witnessed SOF: How?! What?! That wasn't an automatic door! They rush inside JJs: Hey, Cha quick question Cha: Yeah? JJs: How did you do that just now Cha: You want to know how? JJs: Very much so. yes Cha Starts to tear up Cha: I thought you'd never ask. I'm getting a little emotional here, Sniff. Okay here goes: you get a good grip on the ball, and you point it very precisely at the location at which you want the ball to hit, and the- JJs: What the heck are you talking about?! Cha: Wall-Ball. isn't that what you wanted to ask about? JJs: What you just did back there! you made the door open without even touching it Cha: Yeah, that's how doors work, duh! SOF: Cha, i can assure you that that is not at all how doors function Cha: You mean doors don't open for you when you walk past them? JJs: of course not!! Since when did you have this ability? Cha: Well, for as long as I can remember, I've had this ''ability''; I just assumed everyone else had it too. I mean, everyone uses it in the mall. JJs: That's because the mall has automatic doors installed, Cha Cha: oh. well that explains that SOF: We still need to figure out why you possess such a strange ability that the entire world's populace does not have. Cha: hehe! I'm a wizard While they're busy theorizing, a puff of blue smoke emerges in front of them, revealing a hideous ghost with lots of facial hair and a bulging red eye. Everyone in the Ice cream store run for their lives Blue Ghost: Come on, people! I'm actually really nic-....annnnd they're gone. Cha: Who are you?! Blue Ghost: It's me, Jacky the ghost man Cha stares Blankly in silence Blue Ghost: I helped you pass your elementary school exam! Cha continues to stare in silence Blue Ghost: Come on you've got to remember me i was there for your 19th birthday party Cha: Sorry, not ringing a bell JJs: JUST TELL US WHO YOU ARE! Blue Ghost: I'm the person who's been opening doors for Cha this whole time Cha: but why? Blue Ghost: Mom always said it isn't polite to make a classy lady open the door herself. and trust me.....you do NOT want to disappoint mother she is NASTY.....but don't TELL HER I SAID THAT! please! Cha: So all this time, I thought that's how doors functioned; it was actually YOU helping me! Blue Ghost: Exactly. Cha: will you keep helping me Blue Ghost: Well, since my cover's been blown by your friends and seeing as our relationship was meaningless and COMPLETELY one-sided, I think I'm going to take a vacation. Cha: Goodbye, ghost man. I'm gonna miss you. Blue Ghost: i highly doubt it [vanishes] Cha: Gee, it sure is going to be hard getting used to opening doors manually from now on. JJs: No worries! we'll teach you the ropes SOF: Yeah! Cha: thanks guys [they hug] They leave the Ice cream store and head back home Cha: BTW, I heard the store right next to the SBC building sells really strong plastic wall-ball balls! THE END 3
WinterArcanine Posted October 27 Posted October 27 It was a very dark and eerie night. You had went for a walk in the nearby woods, but you lost track of time and ended up still being deep inside the woods even at 9:00 PM! It's ok though, you know where you're going, you've been to these woods plenty of times. Sure it's dark and creepy, and there are so many stories of creepy, unexplainable, and even downright horrifying things happening in these woods at night....but who cares, that only happens to OTHER people! It would never happen to YOU.....right? Suddenly, you hear the sound of a tree branch behind you, and you look to see a GIANT terrifying shadow lurking 20 feet behind you! You're just standing there, in shock and terror as you see this thing's bright glowing eyes and long arms that appear to end with sharp claws staring right at you. Suddenly, it starts SPRINTING towards you. You scream loudly and start running away from the terrifying figure, too scared to even try to think about what horrifying monster this thing is. You try going in many weird directions, try running through the thickest sections of the woods, everything....and it does nothing. The monster is still chasing you, and only seems to be getting closer and closer. Right when it seems like you might be getting farther away from it, you suddenly trip and fall to the ground. By the time you look up, the monster has gotten to you. Now that it's right in front of you, you see that the monster was a Grizzly Bear. You feel relieved for about half a second, due to the fact that it turned out not to be a ghost or monster or demon or some other sort of horrifying thing, but then you remember that it is a Grizzly Bear, and become terrified once more. The Bear looks like it's just about ready to maul you so it can eat you. You accept that this is the end of your life. But then suddenly, the Bear looks at you happily and cutely. It suddenly speaks and says "Hi human! Is there any chance you'd watch my favorite show with me? I love watching things, but I always feel so lonely....". You realize the Bear wasn't dangerous, but instead just wanted a friend. You reply "Sure, I'll watch it with you!". The two of you walk over to the Bear's cave, which really looked more like a house's basement. It had plenty of things, including a large couch and a TV. You and the Bear sit down and the bear turns on the TV. "So, what are we watching?", you ask the Bear. "We're watching my favorite show, Kamp Koral!", the Bear replies happily. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO", you scream in terror, as you realize that the scariest thing in the woods wasn't a monster or the chance of death, but a cute, cuddly bear who will make you watch 75 fucking episodes of Kamp Koral. 2
JCM Posted October 30 Posted October 30 Blood Moon “Are they ready, Tim?” I had just finished pulling the chains out of the closet as Caleb pulled the blinds down over our window. The blinds wouldn’t stop the transformation from happening, but they would make the thing he transformed into much weaker. “They’re ready,” I said. “Good.” Caleb and I lived in an apartment in Loris, South Carolina, a small town not far from Myrtle Beach. While we had no trouble finding work on the beach during the summer, it would inevitably lead to us getting laid off and living off unemployment checks until spring came ‘round again. I peeked through the blinds, finding a sky that was orange as a pumpkin and only a sliver of the sun that that lit up the sky hours before. An hour from now, the sky would be black, dotted by stars, with a prominent place taken by that glowing white orb more dangerous than most of the billions of people who would soon be under it could imagine. I locked one end of the chains to the foot of our bed, and then I wrapped the chains around Caleb. “Tighter,” he said. “If I go any tighter, you won’t be able to breathe,” I replied. “I won’t be able to breathe if you put a bullet in my head, either.” I shuddered. I knew what I had to do if Caleb got out of the chains, but I didn’t like how nonchalant he was about it. I began to worry more and more that he wanted to get out of the chains so that I would finally put him out of his misery...out of our misery. Caleb and I had been best friends for as long as I can remember. I didn’t know when our friendship started, but I knew why it started. We were the only kids in our elementary, middle, and high school classes who had single mothers. My dad left my mom for a younger woman he met on the beach shortly before I was born, and Caleb’s dad left his mom shortly after he was born, but I didn’t know why for the longest time, though there plenty of rumors, whispered by gossiping old ladies on every corner. I would eventually learn that Caleb’s father left due to his condition, a condition I didn’t know about until we were both accepted to Coastal Carolina in Conway. Caleb’s mother got us together that night, with a beautiful crescent moon in the sky, overlooking a pair of excited 17-year-olds who didn’t realize just how challenging the next ten years would be for them. Caleb started to twitch. “You should probably get out now. I feel it starting.” I walked out of our bedroom, passing a calendar with today’s date circled. I closed the door behind me but didn’t bother locking it because, if Caleb got out of the chains, a lock wouldn’t do much good against him. I sat on a couch and reached between the cushions. There was a handgun full of silver bullets. I didn’t want to use it but kept it near me just in case. The howling began just minutes later. I heard the chains being rattled and felt my hands shaking. The condition Caleb had was lycanthropy, a condition that causes people to turn into werewolves. It was something he had inherited from his grandmother and one she had inherited from her grandparents, and so on and so forth, this horrible, secret disease being passed down through generations starting from the Native Americans who first inhabited these lands. Those with lycanthropy used to live together in their own tribes, as a werewolf never kills one of their own, but when the Europeans settled here and discovered them, they killed as many as they could find, believing lycanthropy to be a curse from the devil. What used to be a thriving population was quickly whittled down, and many of those who managed to escape the original massacre were discovered and executed along with any “suspected werewolves” found during the years of the Salem witch trials. Today, there may be a hundred werewolves out there, there may be ten, there might not be any outside of Caleb. The instinct to form packs has been so severely punished throughout history that Caleb was told by his mother, and his mother’s mother, the only other person he knew with his condition, that he could not seek others like him out no matter how much he wanted to. I think he listened to them, too, until his grandmother died last year. Since then, I’ve seen him on all types of internet forums, Reddit threads, and Discord servers specializing in the paranormal. I’m almost certain I’ve seen him on the dark web once, too. I asked him just a week ago why he was so obsessed with finding other werewolves. “I don’t want to be alone in this world,” he said. “You aren’t alone,” I responded. “You have me.” “It’s not the same. It’s just...it’s not.” I didn’t want to tell him I was feeling hurt by this, because I knew he was feeling things I could never relate to, things possibly nobody else living could relate to, including his own mother. She had called me just a few days ago to tell me that Caleb was ignoring her calls, that she was worried about him, and that even though she didn’t have Caleb’s werewolf instincts, her motherly instincts told her plenty. I told her I would look after him, and I was looking after him, but I was worried, too. Not much happened in Loris, but we did have one big event that got everyone in town excited: the annual Loris Bog-Off, a festival with rides, snacks, a zoo, and of course, all the chicken bog we could eat. I went with my mom every year before starting college, but Caleb was never there, as he tried to avoid big crowds whenever possible. Last week, however, Caleb told me he wanted to go to this year’s Bog-Off, and that’s what we did that weekend. Caleb seemed like a child again, laughing and screaming on every ride, petting every pig and goat he could, and scarfing down lots and lots of chicken bog. Even outside of his first Bog-Off experience, Caleb had been eating more and more, putting on at least ten pounds since the last full moon, and he was husky before then. I worried that this extra weight would make it easier for him to break the chains, but I didn’t voice that worry. I didn’t want Caleb to feel like I was trying to control his life, especially with him still mourning his grandmother. He was the happiest I had seen him in a long time at the Bog-Off, and the last thing I wanted to do was interfere with that. The howling grew louder. Caleb thrashed more and more, but the chains held. After an hour of listening to Caleb in his wolf form, I assumed he was tired now and I could finally rela- SNAP I heard a chain break, and my eyes widened. THUD I heard the chains clatter as they fell to the ground, and my heart started to race. I felt the gun between the couch cushions as Caleb slammed into the door from the other side. He crashed into it once...twice... I quickly pulled the gun out as the door flew off its hinges and the large creature that used to be my best friend sprinted towards me. I pulled the trigger without thinking, and the creature paused for a moment before turning and leaping out the window, ripping the blinds and giving me a perfect view of the full moon that turned Caleb into that monster. I ran to the window and saw the creature lying on the ground in front of our apartment building before slowly getting up and trotting off. I slid the gun into my pocket and noticed a bullet hole in the wall of our bedroom. I didn’t come close to hitting the creature. I rushed out of our apartment building, but the creature was nowhere to be found. I then heard a familiar howl from downtown, and I covered my mouth, realizing the creature was now in the densest part of the city on a Friday night. There would be dozens of people gathered in every bar and restaurant downtown, unaware of the wild predator locked onto their scents. I didn’t know why it had to be tonight, out of all the nights I restrained Caleb, I didn’t know why tonight had to be the night he broke free of them. Had it been a sleepy winter night, a Monday or Tuesday night, the carnage would have been limited. Caleb forgetting how to open doors in his wolf form meant most people, likely in their homes, would have enough warning to pull out their own guns, and while a non-silver bullet won’t kill this creature, it would have certainly slowed it down. Caleb usually spent his summers with his grandmother in a more remote part of South Carolina, a part cars rarely, if ever, drove through. The privacy meant his grandmother could transform in peace, and when Caleb visited, it was the only time he could feel safe under full moons without needing to be chained down. Since his grandmother was like him, his wolf form wouldn’t attack her. He always looked forward to his time with his grandmother, and once he had to start working summers with me, he would leave for his grandmother’s place before Thanksgiving, and I wouldn’t see Caleb again until March, right before we had to start working again. Where his grandmother lived, there was no cell service, and she never came here to visit, so I never actually spoke to her. I only knew what she looked like from Caleb’s photos, and the first time I saw her in person was last year, dolled up in her casket at the funeral. I doubt she would have wanted to speak to me, though, as I heard multiple times from her daughter that she felt I was holding Caleb back from Caleb’s “singular duty”, getting married, having kids, ensuring that this special power they had would continue to exist. Caleb never indicated any interest in marriage to me, though, and while he had been on plenty of dates, I don’t think he wanted to tell another person about his condition, something he didn’t feel nearly as much pride about as his grandmother did. “This isn’t some superpower, it’s a curse,” I heard Caleb say one morning after cleaning up the hair he shed and putting on new clothes to replace the ones his stronger, more muscular form ripped. “It’s a curse,” he continued. “I didn’t ask to be born with this, and I wish I hadn’t been. I wish...” Caleb paused, knowing that what he was about to say would have gotten him smacked by his grandmother. “I wish nobody would have to be born with this again.” I ran into the first bar I saw, and it was red everywhere. On the walls, on the ceiling, on the floor. People lying everywhere with fresh bite marks and claw marks. They were still as lamp posts, fear frozen onto many of their faces. I was too late. I ran into another bar and found a grisly scene just as bad as the last one. The creature wasn’t there. I ran into a restaurant beside it. Everyone there was dead, too, but this time, it included children. I knew I had to be quick, stop this creature before it murdered anybody else, but I couldn’t help myself. I fell to my knees and cried, wailing like that creature in the night. These people weren’t just murdered by what Caleb transformed into. They were murdered by me, because I couldn’t bring myself to do the one thing Caleb and his family trusted me to do if he shed his chains before shedding his fur. I wanted to believe I had simply missed, I wanted to convince myself that I was just scared and my shot was off, but those were just excuses. I had to kill him, and because I didn’t, he was going to kill as many people as he could find. I had to get up. I had to stop feeling sorry for myself. I went to more buildings, found more shattered windows, more still, terrified bodies. The creature seemed to know anatomy as well as a doctor, knowing exactly where to scratch or bite to kill these people instantly, or have them bleed out so fast they had no chance of being saved. The first time I heard screams, they were in the distance. I immediately ran out of the bar I was in, and I saw the creature zip out of one a few blocks away from me. I followed it into a restaurant with my gun drawn, saw it about to lunge at a kid, and fired my gun again. This time, I didn’t miss. The people in the restaurant looked at the creature, looked at me, and then began clapping. I ignored them as I walked to the creature, nodded at the kid, a justifiably scared little girl, as well as her parents, who were in front of her and in shock. I picked the creature up and noticed it was already beginning to shed fur. I had to get back to the apartment fast. By the time I dropped the creature on our couch, it was already looking like Caleb again. I pulled the silver bullet out of his back and then felt his pulse. As I expected and as I feared, there was no movement. I grabbed a knife from the kitchen and slashed his throat, being careful to make it look like it was done by a wolf. I then went to bed, making sure not to think about Caleb’s mother or the families of all of the people I couldn’t save, thoughts that would have simply kept me up all night. I eventually did go to sleep, the full moon shining as brightly as ever above me. 2
Steel Sponge Posted October 31 Posted October 31 Treehouse of Horror LXIX: Dead Homer Society S??E01: The Fall of Troy A familiar face appeared in a white room. Except for a single chair, the area itself was empty. “Hi, I’m Troy McClure. You might remember me from such classic thrillers like “Apocalypse Meow,” “Dude, Where’s My Crowbar?,” and “Itchy & Scratchy: Blood and Tuna Fish.” If you’re receiving this message, well...that means I’m dead – and I’ve been dead for decades. “In fact, I may be one of the first to be killed off without warning. What the residents of Springfield don’t realize, however, is that after this mysterious force gets rid of me, there will be a wave of sudden deaths that will affect the least likely suspects – Maude Flanders, Edna Krabappel, Rabbi Hyman Krustofsky, the Simpsons family pet Snowball II, and yes, even our old friend Larry the Barfly. It will start off slow, but at one point, the frequency of these deaths will only begin to quicken the pace and pile up. If you’ve found this tape and you may or may not be aware that you’re about to be dead...you’ve been warned. “...Ah, but don’t worry! It won’t be long before we’re all replaced by AI and my computerized image will be able to star in a slew of new, future flicks such as “Rage Against the Snack Machine,” “My Wife the Robot,” and...this particular installment of The Simpsons’ Treehouse of Horror series.” S??E02: Marvin and Let Die The newest season of modern Simpsons starts off strong with yet another plot dedicated to Homer and Marge’s years-long marriage being put into questioning. The drama would resolve after the Simpsons family would be reminded that Marvin Monroe has died (and for real this time), to the surprise of not one viewer who voted on which Simpsons character will die between 6 series regulars and one relatively obscurer character who’s made little appearances for ages. After the funeral reminded Homer and Marge of their first family therapy session with Marvin, they made things up as if the last 20 minutes of recycled story elements never happened. S??E03: Snowball Dies Again Snowball V died and that was it. S??E04: If I’m Lion, I’m Dyin’ “Man is it so cool to be a bunch of one-note jerkasses with almost no interesting plots for us to look forward to,” Jimbo gloated. “Hey, we got nothing better to do, so let’s sneak inside the Springfield Zoo and wrestle a lion!” Kearney suggested. “Oh, that’s a good idea,” Dolph remarked. (NOTE: All three of them were found to be mauled to death by a lion the very next day.) S??E05: Tears for Beers “Hey Moe, have you seen Barney?” Homer asked the aptly-named bartender. “He hasn’t been to the tavern since the past week,” said Moe. “I’ve heard he’s checked out of the hospital, and uh…it’s not good news.” “...Meaning?” Homer replied. “Barney is dead.” As it turned out, over fifty seasons worth of drinking Duff wasn’t good for one’s health. Homer looked at his mug sadly and sighed, “D’oh…” S??E06: Frinkenstein’s Monster II After the losses of nearly hundreds of cats named Snowball, previously owned by the Simpsons family, Doctor Professor Jonathan Frink takes it upon himself to construct their corpses into one whole body, presenting it his newest invention. However, if you know the story of Frankenstein, you’d already how this will end. Frink died, unable to fulfill his hopes of destroying his own creation. Frankensnowball was put in captivity until it died of malnutrition. S??E07: Six Feet Under Groundskeeper Bart, deciding to pull another prank in the school, digs a hole deep enough to reach the center of the Earth. Groundskeeper Willie notices Bart’s tomfoolery but slips and falls down the hole. No trace of Wilie was made known afterwards and was declared dead as a result. S??E08: Teacher’s Pet Cemetery After Martin Prince Jr.’s pet dog suddenly dies, Bart and Milhouse make a bet with Martin that they’ll use demon magic to bring the dog back to life. To their surprise, it works, but Martin would later be found dead at the paws of the zombie dog. Bart and Milhouse would veer away from the summoning arts immediately afterwards. S??E09: When the Bus Driver is No Longer Bussin’ After taking Springfield Elementary’s students to school, Otto continued to drive along the road with his walkman on his person. He would then meet a terrible fate after his bus collides with another bus. The damage was enough to kill him on impact Then, at his funeral, the school board fired him. S??E10: The D’oh-ctor’s In Dr. Hibbert suddenly dies after a fatal fall from a long flight of stairs, leading up to another episode of Homer shenanigans where he gets roped into becoming Springfield’s interim doctor. After putting up with at least 15 minutes of Homer’s stupidity, Homer is let go from the job while the episode ends with Lisa wondering how Springfield will get by without a go-to healthcare provider. S??E11: In a One Hearse Open Sleigh “Santa’s Little Helper, look out!” Bart cried out towards the Simpsons family dog, who appeared be on the road, who was about to be struck by an oncoming car. Unfortunately, it was too late. Santa’s Little Helper was hit and couldn’t move another muscle. Bart and the rest of the Simpsons family came to his side. “Ohhh…” Bart groaned with sadness. “Well Bart, what can you do?” Lisa lectured in her stern yet monotone delivery. “As the old saying goes, all dogs go to heaven, and now Santa’s Little Helper is there and no longer with us. He will remain in our memory, but it’s the for the best that we move on from this-” “Aw, shut up, Lis,” Bart interrupted. “hooOohHhhmmmGggg nooohmmmm, SauUUUntaaaaugh’s Hmmmllpuurrrrrrr is gAwAwoaaon,” Marge said, her voice now sounding too strained to vocalize clear words. “(Suck, suck, suck),” Maggie grieved. “He was such a good boy...anyway, who’s up for some hot dogs?” Homer’s poor comedic timing uttered. Santa’s Little Helper was later cremated and memorialized in a graveyard surrounded by headstones for all of the Simpsons family’s former Snowballs. S??E12: Smoked Out One day, Marge’s sisters Patty & Selma were each smoking a joint in the Simpsons household while, once again, making snide remarks about Homer. That was until Marge told them… “YoOuuUu Knowhmmmm, if yUOuOuUooU kEEEeeep schmmmokeeeing like thesssss, DeaaAAHthmmmm wellll knuuuhuhhk dowOwown yorr deoouuuorrs.” “Hmmm? What did you say?” Selma asked. Patty and Selma both later died from COPD. S??E13: The Assassination of Abe Simpson Homer, in another attempt to bond with his father Abe Simpson, surprises him with tickets to a Fall Out Boy concert (and of course, due to the series’ timeline stretching into current times, Abe was overjoyed since Fall Out Boy was around during his rebellious youth). At the concert, and after some head-scratching remarks from Bart about the band naming themselves after Radioactive Man’s sidekick, Fall Out Boy performed their newest song “Watch Out for That Gun, Old Man.” Despite Abe’s ignorance, the song’s title would prove to be an unfortunate omen as Abe would then be suddenly shot dead, leading to an immediate evacuation for everyone in the venue while the police would catch the assassin. After a 12-day moose hunt for the perpetrator, who was later killed on the spot, the identity of the killer was later revealed to be Jasper Beardsley, whose motive was revenge for Abe turning down his offer to see Good Charlotte. Fall Out Boy would then later propel the charts with their tribute to Abe Simpson. S??E14: Worst. Death. Ever It was a normal day at the Springfield comic book store until Comic Book Guy begins to choke on a Krusty Burger. Bart and Milhouse, who were both key witnesses of the urgent matter thought ‘what would Radioactive Man do?’ and spend the rest of the episode’s runtime trying to figure out how to perform CPR to no avail, but not before Comic Book Guy utters his final words: “Worst. Death. Ever.” S??E15: Who Shot Ralph? Police chief Clancy Wiggum was alone in a room with his son Ralph Wiggum when he pointed a gun directly at him. “Why are you doing this, dad?” “Listen son, I don’t want to do this, but as it appears, you are a prime suspect in these sudden wave of deaths in Springfield. Just confess and I won’t have to pull the trigger.” “I didn’t even do anything!” “Ah, but that those are the exact kind of words anyone would say if they did commit the crime.” “I don’t know what’s going on!” “Okay...you leave me with no choice.” With one pull of a trigger – bang. Chief Wiggum fell unconscious with the gun still in his hands. Ralph stood motionless as police sirens sounded and officers entered the room. Ralph was left with no other option than to accept his fate as a framed murderer. Ralph then found himself in a standoff, having taken the gun from his father’s hands, and made the ultimate sacrifice. A heartfelt funeral was held for the Wiggums. Lisa additionally gave her eulogy that was part-saxophone tribute and part-anti-police brutality filibustering before concluding that the mystery of who shot Ralph was never worth knowing compared to the feelings shared with the departed. Nelson Muntz breaks the mood by admitting that he was the one who shot him before uttering his usual “Ha-ha!” S??E16: Another Dumb Clip Show It was the time of the occasion yet again for The Simpsons to salvage its budget with another dumb clip show. Alongside another half-assed rendition of “We Didn’t Start the Fire,” which was so bad that the in-house band died midway into it, the clip show would then present an ‘In Memoriam’ tribute to all the Simpsons characters that been lost, including news anchor Kent Brockman, who died off-screen, all before the episode would end with a formal apology for the clip show’s very existence. S??E17: A Milhouse is Not a Home “Hey Milhouse, you wanna help me with my next prank I have planned for Principal Skinner?” Bart asked his friend Milhouse. “Sorry, Bart. You may not know this, but...I’m dead.” Milhouse uttered. Bart was confused, but also dismayed. He then replied, “I don’t understand. You look alive to me.” “I just sold my soul for some ALF NFTs,” Milhouse explained. “I only have a few times to remain in the physical world before I’m gone.” “Milhouse, don’t die on me, man!” Bart pleaded, desperation in his tone. “You don’t know how much of a big mistake you’ve made! Those NFTs are worth absolutely nothing compared to you! I don’t even know how I’ll ever go on without you as my friend. Everyone around me is dropping like flies and you’re one of the last that I’d ever want to see end up dead and-” “Bart, don’t talk, everything will be just fine…” Milhouse finished before his body was lifted to the heavens. … “Ohhhh….” S??E18: No One Nelson in the World Lisa finds Nelson feeling bummed due to most of his classmates having been killed off, while he’s also grown tired of trying to continuously pick on Bart. Knowing how much of a sweet spot Nelson has for her, Lisa advises him that he can now consider trying to do something in his life that he always wanted to do after finishing school. Nelson tells her that he thought about wanting to be a gravedigger. With a renewed feeling of interest in his own life, letting everyone in the streets know that he’s made a change of heart and that he’s going to paint the town of Springfield red. He was then immediately run over by the ghost of the bus that killed Otto. S??E19: A Moe Walks Out of a Bar Homer visited Moe’s Tavern to find the once bustling bar to now be mostly deserted. Seeing how Homer was Moe’s only loyal customer left, he had a favor for him. “You know, Homer, business has been very meager ever since most of our buddies died,” said Moe. “I suppose I can’t hang around longer in Springfield, so I was thinking...it was about time I got a cellphone.” “Oh Moe, I’d very glad to help...even if we might not see each other as often anymore,” Homer remarked. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I should warn you that you and your family are better off leaving Springfield,” Moe advised. “Take my word for it.” “Hey, let’s not dwell so much about it. Let’s go and get you a cellphone.” And so began the long-awaited ‘Moe gets a cellphone episode’ as Homer and Moe went to the nearest cellphone store to see what was best for the lonely bartender. However, the very moment Moe pressed a button on his would-be first cellphone, it released a powerful electrical shock that killed him in an instant. “D’oh!” S??E20: Hey Krusty, Nice Shot --ITCHY & SCRATCHY IN: THE LAST GOUDA-BYE-- The cartoon short opened with Scratchy on his deathbed and Itchy by his side. A flashback showed Itchy dropping a nuclear bomb on the cat. Itchy allowed himself to die from radiation poisoning – but not before unplugging Scratchy’s life support. “Hehehey, kids!” Krusty’s fake joyous demeanor immediately turned into a sorrowful expression as he continued saying, “Yeah, that final Itchy & Scratchy cartoon sure was depressing, huh? We just lost our entire animation team for the show, so it is curtains for them, unfortunately. But I assure you that the Krusty the Clown Show still has some barrels of laughs! Isn’t that right, Sideshow Mel?” The camera revealed an empty spot when Krusty side-glanced to where Sideshow Mel’s post usually was during the show. “...Oh yeah, he’s dead too…” Krusty spoke in a somber tone, but returned to his faux-cheerful disposition in an instant. “Oh well, to any of you kids watching...if there are any of you left, I still have ways to entertain you lot!” The live audience from behind the camera was revealed to be completely empty as well. “Umm…now at Krusty Burger, you have the chance to win an official Krusty Skibidi! …Do the Krusty Shake? ...Hawk tuah?” At that point, Krusty’s enthusiasm has been completely dissolved. “Fine, screw it. I’m going to put a gun in mouth and see if I can actually survive it, if that’s what it takes to keep my show afloat. The censors won’t stop me since we’ve lost the folks in-charge of them too!” “No-no-no, Krusty, we won’t even have a show left-” The lone cameraman spoke. “I’m gonna do it!” “No Krusty, don’t do it!” “I’M GONNA FUCKIN’ DO IT!” Bang. (NOTE: despite Krusty’s expectations, he didn’t survive the shot.) S??E21: Raking Bad After being made aware of the sudden, accidental death of Krusty the Clown, his former sidekick, Sideshow Bob began plotting his revenge against Bart once again. “That clown had what he got coming to him,” Sideshow Bob monologues. “Now I just have to settle my score with Bart, and my life can finally start to take a turn for the better, and nobody, not a single Simpson, or even a damned rake can stand in my way!” Sideshow Bob then stepped on a rake. The concussion he received from it was painful enough to kill him. S??E22: Burning Low “Smithers, who is that yellow blob in our plant, and why is he is our only employee?” Mr. Burns asked his assistant. “That’s Homer Simpson, sir. He’s one of your asswipes from sector 7G,” Waylon Smithers explained. “All of our other employess have passed on, sir…so we have been short on staff.” “Oh, I knew it would come to this,” said Burns. “Smithers, I need you to sit down for a moment.” “If it is what I think it is, I don’t want to hear it.” “No, you have ever right to know. I...I don’t have much time left to live, Smithers.” Waylon Smithers got emotional in an instant and cried out, “No, please don’t die on us, sir! If there’s anything that I could do to extend your lifespan, I’d do it! The Springfield Nuclear Power Plant will NEVER be the same without you!” “My condition terminal and incurable, Smithers, I’m afraid.” Smithers tearfully asked him, “Do you have any final requests that I can fulfill for you, sir?” “Hmmm, yes, if I can no longer run the power plant, someone else will have. Someone I can put all my trust in, someone like...who is that man’s name again?” “Homer Simpson, sir? Are you really sure you can entrust your business to him?” “Very...” “There’s something I have to do for you, sir. I never had the courage to tell you this until now, but...I love you – and I loved you ever since the day you hired me.” Mr. Burns was shellshocked by Smithers’s revelation at first. He then finally said to him, “This changes everything…” “So you’ll trust me with the plant?” “No…I would now like for my final request for you to have sex with me. Make it long and make it hard, Smithers.” “I will give you the best sex you ever had in your life, you handsome son of a bitch.” “...Excellent…” (NOTE: Due to complaints from Disney, the planned sex scene between Montgomery Burns and Waylon Smithers had been cut.) S??E23: Blown to Smithers-eens The town of Springfield was in utter shock when they’ve heard the news from NASA that a giant asteroid would be heading straight for them. Many refused to offer as human sacrifices to stop it, but then, Waylon Smithers decided to take up the offer to try and stop the asteroid of doom from hitting their home. When asked why he chose to save Springfield, Smithers answered with a tear streaking down from one of his eyes, “I’m doing this for my old dear friend Montgomery Burns, because I know it’s what he would’ve wanted for me to do…” Once as the asteroid was nearing its trajectory towards Springfield, Smithers was launched in its path. Smithers thought about the intense sex he had with Mr. Burns before his death (despite the scene in question never being shown), and it came to him that if he was going to destroy the asteroid, he was going to unleash all of his pleasure that he had towards Burns with all his might. An explosion occurred, confirming the destruction of the asteroid and as well as the death of Waylon Smithers. The human sacrifice plan turned out to be a success and the late Smithers was later hailed as a hero to all of Springfield. S??E24: Caught in the Cross Fire “We’re all gathered here today to pay tribute to the departed, including our loved ones,” Reverend Lovejoy spoke, “My Mrs. Lovejoy, Ned Flanders’ sons Rod and Todd, and as well as his fifth wife, Pamela Anderson, Homer Simpson’s Abe Simpson, Marge’s Patty and Selma, and many others. They all may be gone now, but I ensure the Lord is watching us from afar...however, I openly refuse to admit that this was all part of God’s plan.” The prayers session would take an unexpected turn as the church attendants would then see Reverend Lovejoy nailing himself to a cross and lighting a match onto it. “Everyone we know and everyone we love will just keep dying and there may not be anything we can do about it except pray that God sees no need to continue punishing us. If the Lord were to save me from this situation right now, then I have every reason to keep my faith, but if not, then I firmly believe that there is no God. ...There is no God, there is no God, there is no God, THERE IS NO GOD!…” Lovejoy’s mantra continued as the attendants saw no other option than to leave before the entire church is burned down. Reverend Lovejoy was later confirmed dead the next day. S??E25: The Last Luncheon Seymour Skinner had invited Superintendent Chalmers once again for lunch at his home. Little did the superintendent know that this meal was going to be his last. “I hope you’re prepared for some ‘Steamed Hams,’ Superintendent,” said Skinner. “I really steamed this time, just for you.” “You can’t fool me any longer, Seymour, I can still smell and sense smoke coming from your oven,” Chalmers replied. “Oh...I guess I left the stove on, didn’t I?” Skinner replied. “Then go turn it off, or I’m leaving.” “I’m afraid I won’t do that, Superintendent. I’ve locked all the doors and boarded all the windows, so you can’t leave. Why don’t we just enjoy our luncheon right now, for old time’s sake?” “Seyyyyymouuuuuurr, if there’s any reason why you’re holding me hostage, you better have a good reason for that!” “Superintendent, without mother, without any students left to teach or to punish, my life no longer has meaning, but you...you’re the only person left who can fill this pathetic, empty void I have inside of me.” “That’s enough of your sappy talk, Seymour.” “You’re all I have, Superintendent! If I’m going to die, the last thing I’d ever want is to die alone!” Skinner said, as his tone grew completely desperate. “Sure, there’s still Bart, but you know how I feel about the little bastard!” “So, I really am that important to you, huh?” “As long as we’re still both still alive...there’s something you should know. The first time we had Steamed Hams together, and all that stuff about an Aurora Borealis inside of my kitchen – that was all a skittish cover-up for ruining my own cooking.” “I knew it…but we certainly shared some fond memories from that day. I guess I wouldn’t mind being burned to death for your sake, Seymour.” “Yes, and now we can share new memories one last time with this meal. Perhaps our lives will be immortalized when the remnants of our bodies scatter all across the Northern Lights.” “That would be nice.” “Even though I, uh...boarded up the windows. I do think the Northern Lights are out here tonight.” “You sure do steam a good ham, Seymour.” “I know, Superintendent, I know…” S??E26: Dingly Dongly, the Flanders is Dead-Diddly “Hi-diddly-ho, neighborino,” Ned Flanders greeted to Homer. “It seems we’re the only ones left here now.” “Well, I hope you die a slow, painful death, Flanders,” Homer responded coldly. “I got to say Homer, you shouldoodly feel very luckdiddly that you still have a family,” Flanders remarked, so you have my prayers that nothing bad happens to you or yours.” “Of all people that have to still be alive, why did it have to be you?” Homer sneered. “I guess it’s because I got the Lord looking after me.” It was then that Homer had an idea, and a very grim one at that. “Hmmm…since there is no one else to hang around with, I guess I wouldn’t mind spending some time with you, Flanders.” “Oh, thanks neighbor, thanks a bunch!” Homer and Ned took themselves fishing in a lake miles away from Springfield. When Homer found the perfect opportunity, he knocked Flanders off the boat and watched as he was noshed by a school of piranhas in the slow and painful death that he had anticipated. Satisfied with his goal of getting rid of Flanders, Homer went back home. S??E27: Something About Maggie Weeks have past since the Simpsons have wound up being the only ones left living in Springfield. Just when they thought they would get adjusted to this new life, however, they would notice that someone is missing… “Hooauaoaoaohhmmmurrrrr, hahhhhvvvv you seEeEeeEen Mahghhghkfeohjei?” Marge’s still-strained voice spoke. “Come to think of it...I haven’t seen her all day,” Homer responded. “D’oh! When will this nightmare end!?” “What can you do, dad?” Lisa lectured. “Maggie is in a better place now and I’m sure she’s now watching over us-” “I don’t want to hear it!” Homer interrupted. “I don’t know what to do now that Maggie is gone and-” Before Homer could grieve any more, the ghost of Maggie chucked her pacifier into Homer’s mouth. Maggie’s spiritual entity waved goodbye before disappearing. “...Cool,” Bart remarked towards seeing the ghost of Maggie. S??E28: Dead Bart With all of Springfield being deserted, Bart took up the opportunity to do whatever he wanted by loitering and skateboarding all around the city. It was all fun and games until Bart bumped into the statue of Jebediah Springfield, causing the head to fall off. “Ay, caramba!” Bart exclaimed before the head of Jebediah crushed and killed him. S??E29: Ammonal Lisa Bart’s sudden death took a toll on what now remained of the Simpsons family. As something started to come to Lisa’s mind, she decided she would have to break the news to her parents. “Mom, dad, it has occurred to me that I can no longer coexist,” Lisa announced. “No! We can’t afford to lose you too!” Homer pleaded. “Look at the world around you, dad, and see how it’s affected me,” Lisa continued. “Ralph is dead, Nelson is dead, Maggie is dead, Bart is dead, Elon Musk is alive and yet the man that I thought was the greatest inventor in the world turned out to be a massive jackass. Even though we’re all animated characters, are we all just destined to die? If that’s true, then it’s only fair then I must go to the afterlife, too…” “I’m already having trouble processing losing the boy, we can still be a family of three, Lisa…” “In this saxophone, I have implanted a pipe bomb inside of it. The very moment I make a sound go out of it, I will explode.” “You don’t have to do this Lisa. I’m sure this problem can be figured out soon.” “...If at all.” Lisa finished before she used her saxophone and exploding right afterwards. S??E30: I Am Marge, Hear Me Croak “Hb45g95nevgopewebv4ioffc04nbvg9036yfgt925gt98cdy0-p6yhjfr90w365ogtbd0,” Marge spoke. “Oh Marge, I don’t know what to do anymore, now that you’re all I’ve got,” said Homer. “Without Maggie, Lisa, and the boy…I just don’t know what to do.” “Vnkyfiotfiofyjtufg4l4dohtgb50gbki690d7vg3b5-gs90y436nkif,” Marge replied. “You always know what to say, Marge,” Homer remarked. “F6kjf63wvhghkn5bev0hbnmvwjgbo03659gdcbjeylh3ynbd90th2vjkd0hg3vbdjhgol47hq.” “What’s that you say? You want us to live forever and ever? Yes, I would like that very much.” “Hmhmmm ohhhh Hommmmmie, I….I…u53efknytgffcbvusdohtfdfvkiwre-y5febcddiu30-t4grvbsd245r7gfehgfe0845tr970gfegcdvqeik3r2-=efdtgf73eiuv43987te38t…” Marge didn’t speak another word for moved another muscle afterwards after her final struggle of getting her words out. Seeing that he was all alone now, there was only one word Homer could respond with. “…D’oh…” S??E31: Till Death D’oh Us Part Homer sat all alone in the Simpsons family couch, unable to think or do anything now that he was the only person left in Springfield. Just when it seemed like the episode was going to be 20 whole minutes of moping, Homer would receive an unexpected visitor. What materialized right before him was a figure resembling Death, only it was… “Current Simpsons showrunner Al Jean?” Homer questioned. “In the flesh,” Al Jean responded. “What are you doing here?” “I came here to finish the job I made myself do…” Al replied. “Can you tell me what’s going on?” Homer asked. “Everyone I know and love is gone. Marge, Maggie, Lisa, Bart, Santa’s Little Helper, Moe, Barney, I miss them all! I even miss Flanders!” “Homer, I need you to do me a favor. You see, after running this series for over 30 seasons straight, I was cursed with the gift of immortality,” Al was explained. “All these attempts to bait fans for views, hyping up the deaths of important characters only to give it to someone unimportant, they weren’t working anymore, and yet even after losing most of our original voice cast Disney and FOX never wanted to stop The Simpsons. So I thought...why don’t I end it myself and put every single character on the chopping block? It would be easier said than done that I kill you off, but…I just can’t seem to have the heart to, since you’re the only thing that’s keeping this show alive.” “I don’t understand. Why do you need a second opinion from me? Of course I’ll choose death if it means that I can end this suffering!” “You’re right, what’s another 50 years of milking a franchise dry? I could always start a new Simpsons series entirely, maybe even keep another sustainable cast until the time comes where I may resort to using AI, and yet I’ll never die…’Have no fears, we’ve got stories for years,’ we said, stories for decades even, and god, I don’t know much longer I have to endure this…” “Can I die now?” “Sorry, I went off-topic for a moment. What I’m trying to say is, what happens next is all up to you, Homer.” Al continued as a pink sprinkled donut materialized in front of Homer. “Mmmm, donut,” said Homer. “That donut is laced with poison and it will kill you in an instant if you choose to take a bite of it. You can either do that or you can let me transfer my immortality to you. Pick your poison.” Homer didn’t hesitate as he ate the donut whole. “I still choose death!” "D'oh!" Al Jean finished. … … … S??E32: Epilogue Years have passed and the city of Springfield remained uninhabited with life – until one day, Apu suddenly returned and reopened the doors to his old Kwik-E-Mart convenience store. “Hmmm…I wonder where everyone went,” Apu mused. The episode ends with a surprise appearance of the ghost of Lisa Simpson, staring at the viewer for as long as she could, before we also see an appearance from Comic Book Guy’s ghost. “Worst. Treehouse of Horror. EVER!” He finished. 3
Jjs Goodman Posted October 31 Author Posted October 31 The judges have decided and JCM's "Blood Moon" is the winner, congratulations to him! The other participants will also receive candy.
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