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4Kids Edits Ace Attorney


Master Cheeks

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Episode 1: Turnabout Hot Dog

 

The opening shot zooms out to see a shady looking man looking down at the ground sweating viciously.

 

“Drats!” he said angrily. “I scared her so bad she can’t get up! I gotta pin this on someone.” He then remembers passing the shabbily dressed man in orange and decides he will have to do.

 

—----------

 

Several days go by and we pan the camera into a nondescript apartment building. A black, spiky haired young man grabs a jelly donut out of the refrigerator, throwing it into his mouth in a single gulp as he charges out the door on his standard bicycle.

 

“This is Phoenix Wright! He has that name because he’s always RIGHT —- GET IT?” An overly energetic narrator proclaims. “Today is Phoenix’s first case in a courtroom, but right now his biggest issue is just getting to the courthouse in one piece!” As Phoenix pedals his bike up a hill, the opening theme plays which, due to budgetary reasons, is just a rip of the title theme from the GBA version. Phoenix makes his way to the Courthouse, where the original Japanese letters are replaced with a text box with the words “Court House” written in MS Paint in red text color. In the courthouse lobby, Phoenix meets with his boss/mentor Mia Fey. Her outfit is buttoned all the way to the very tip top, hiding any potential boobage along with her magatama necklace.

 

“Wright, you made it! You were almost late!” Mia says.

 

“I know but I left myself just the right amount of time!” Phoenix replies. “Sorry to have kept you waiting, knowing you took time out of your day to see the trial today.”

 

“I wouldn’t miss my underling’s first trial for anything.” Mia says. “Not everyone takes on a murder trial first time around you know?”

 

“I know.” Phoenix says somberly. “But I had to do this…. For friendship!”

 

“Friendship?” Mia asks.

 

“Yes. The power of friendship is making me take this case.” Phoenix replied.

 

—----------------

 

In lieu of important backstory and plot details, we abruptly then cut straight to the courtroom where Phoenix and Mia stand opposing the “fearsome” prosecutor, Wins a Ton Pain. The defendant, Larry Butz, is then led into the courtroom as well.

 

“Nicholas!” Larry cries out to him. “Save me Nicholas! I didn’t do it!”

 

I know Harry. Phoenix thinks to himself. Our friendship will compel us to the truth!

 

“Hard to believe this joker drove you to be an attorney.” Mia said.

 

“He’s a good guy, he just has bad luck…” Phoenix begins as Larry makes a scene with the guard at sitting down. “And sometimes not the best attitude.”

 

“It’s ok just believe in his innocence and use your friendship to find the truth!” Mia says excitedly, again clipping through her scarf.

 

The Judge then bangs his gavel. “The Trial of Mr. Harry Butz is now in session…”

 

“The prosecution is ready.” Pain says.

 

“IT’S LARRY!” He screams at the Judge, to Phoenix’s chagrin. “Nicholas, tell him!” 

 

Larry, don’t make enemies with the judge. “The defense is… ready.” He says nervously.

 

“Mr. Pain, please give us the details of the case.” The Judge asks.

 

Mr. Pain then goes on to explain that the victim from the opening scene, Ms. Cinder Stone, was found indefinitely asleep in her apartment between 4 and 5 PM that day. She was surprised by an intruder, which caused her slumber. The instrument of surprise was a faux stone statue of the Thinker, covered in ketchup due to the victim eating a hot dog before the crime. Said hot dog was not recovered from the scene however. Mr. Pain then submits the statue to the court for examination and acceptance into evidence records.

 

“My my, hard to believe this is fake stone.” The Judge remarks.

 

“It may be fake!” Larry screamed out. “But it contains my real spirit inside!”

 

“Oh so you made the weapon of surprise!?” The Judge asked. “What a wonderful piece of craftsmanship.”

 

“Of course, the defendant’s fingers were all over the weapon as would be expected.” Mr. Pain said.

 

“What do you mean by of course??? Nicholas, help me out here!” Larry shouted.

 

You MADE IT! Of course your fingerprints are all over it!

 

“The Prosecution calls the defendant, Mr. Harry Butz…”

 

“IT’S LARRY!”

 

“To the stand, to state his case!” Larry then stands at the witness stand. “So, we know the victim dumped you…”

 

“Not true — we were the greatest couple of the 1900s!” Larry said enthused. (Its 2015 Harry)

 

“Right, so you knew about her trip to Japan then?” 

 

“T-Trip?” Larry said sheepishly. “What trip?”

 

Mr. Pain then presented a passport with the words “United States Passport '' once again pasted on via MS Paint alongside a picture of her holding the Weapon of Surprise in front of a Japanese monument being cropped on top of the original image of the Statue of Liberty.

 

“H-Hey that’s my gift!” Larry said. “Who even took this photo?”

 

“Why the man she went to Japan with of course.” Mr. Pain said, causing Larry to lose his cool and begin crying. “Obviously, this is a very clear reason for the defendant to put the victim to sleep.” The Judge nods in agreement with Mr. Pain. “One final question, Harry — did you visit the victim’s apartment that day?”

 

After screaming about his name being mispronounced again, Larry says “Maybe. But maybe not.”

 

“Well unluckily for you, we have someone who saw you that day — a witness you may say!” Mr. Pain says confidently. “Your Honor, I would like to call my next witness, Mr. Frank Saw It, to testify!”

 

The shabbily dressed man from the beginning reappears introducing himself. “This is where the fun begins, Wright…” Mia says.

 

—--------

After a commercial break to advertise Pokemon and Yu Gui Oh, we return to the action, as Mr. Saw It introduces himself to the court.

 

“I’m Mr. Frank Saw It, I’m a door to door toy salesman.” He says. “I was on a route when I became a witness”

 

“Please tell the court what you saw on the day of the crime.” The Judge requests.

 

Mr. Saw It goes on to say that around 2 PM he was on his regular route when he saw the defendant walking sus from the victim’s apartment. Curious, he looked inside to see that the victim was fast asleep with the hot dog on the floor next to the victim. He was too fearful to go inside so he went to a payphone.

 

“Why did he go to the trouble of a payphone, one might ask?” Mr. Pain said smugly. “But there was a blackout between 1 and 6 that day, so the phone in the apartment was unusable.” The Judge seemed satisfied with this explanation. “I don’t think you could ask for a more complete, truthful witness.”

 

“The defense may begin it’s cross examination.” The Judge says.

 

“Al-Wright, Phoenix!” Mia quips. “It’s up to you to prove that the witness is lying to save your client.”

 

“He’s lying?” Phoenix asks.

 

“Yes, if your friend is truly innocent there’s a lie hidden in his story. It’s up to you to use the evidence introduced to expose those lies.”

 

 Phoenix takes a deep breath to summon the power of friendship. “Alright Chief, I got this!”

 

Phoenix then claims to have found a contradiction… but is unable to explain where and asks for help. After resetting the DS and loading the save Phoenix gets reminded he has to find this himself. After being handheld to read the report of surprise, he decides to try this again.

 

“Mr. Saw It, you said in your initial testimony that you found a hot dog at the scene of the crime correct?” Phoenix asked.

 

“That is so.” He replied.

 

“Then why was the hotdog not found at the scene of crime!?” Phoenix passionately argues. “This is a major contradiction!”

 

Pain objects loudly and shrilly. “Are you really claiming that the missing hot dog is a major point? It’s a food, it was probably thrown away!”

 

The Judge nodded his head. “I’m going to have to agree with Mr. Pain for now. The missing Hot Dog is not a major contradiction.”

 

Phoenix takes a deep breath of friendship. “Fine, well how about the fact that the report of surprise claims the incident happened around 4 PM which is in direct opposition to Mr. Saw It’s claim of 2 PM!? How about that?”

 

“Well uhh…. Yeah.” The Judge replies. “That is a pretty big problem! Witness, what do you have to say for yourself?”

 

Mr. Saw It begins sweating buckets. “Oh, I-I heard the time! The TV must’ve been on!”

 

Mr. Pain shakes his head. “But there was a blackout!”

 

“AREN’T YOU ON MY SIDE!?” Saw It shouts. “Then it was the clock!”

 

“What clock?” The courtroom says in confusion.

 

“The statue – what Harry used to surprise her!” 

 

Mr. Pain then goes on to explain that, in fact, the weapon of surprise was a clock activated by twisting the head. Larry grins at his awesome invention. The rest of the Courtroom is confused why half the run time has gone on before such a crucial detail was given out to the rest of the cast and audience, but alas we continue on.

 

“Mr. Saw It, this proves you're a liar liar pants on fire!” Phoenix says. “There is no way you could have heard this clock without entering the apartment building! You heard it say the time when you surprised the victim, which is why you remembered it so clearly!”

 

Mr. Saw It continues to sweat buckets. He then throws his toupee off his head into Phoenix’s face and yells at him for being a meanie claiming he can’t prove anything. They then sound the clock to prove the time difference of two hours, seemingly proving the defense’s theory.

 

“Cool idea,” Saw It says. “But can you prove that it was behind on the day of the crime?” Phoenix appears rattled. “If you can’t prove that, everything you said is meaningless.”

 

I can’t lose here after coming so close. I have to tap into the power of my friendship with Larry to save this case!

 

Phoenix begins to flashing back to a childhood memory, but is interrupted by the Judge saying he cannot accuse the witness without proof and Pain’s shit eating grinning in the background. Phoenix begins to accept his defeat when Chief interrupts him.

 

“Now is when we turn the turn tables!” She says. “Don’t think how it can be proven, but why do we even think it was running slow?”

 

Think about it… the time…. The hot dog… the trip… I GOT IT

 

“Since the defense seems to have no rebuttal, I will conclu-” The Judge begins to say.

 

“OBJECTION!” Phoenix shouts. “I can prove it!”

 

Phoenix explains that the time difference between the US and Japan is fourteen hours, meaning the clock was actually fourteen hours behind, not two hours showcasing the poorly animated passport to prove his point. He also claims she hadn’t had time to reset the clock as she had only just returned home and was still eating a hot dog when surprised. The hot dog itself was the motive for the surprise.

 

“Mr. Saw It, you were the only person who remembered seeing that hot dog, and I think I know why. It was the most delectable looking hot dog you had ever seen wasn’t it?” Phoenix asked. Saw It cringed in obvious frustration. “It was so good you couldn’t resist — you had to try it, even if it meant stealing another’s joy.” Phoenix, with the power of friendship guiding him, definitively points at Mr. Saw It so hard it blows wind at him and pushes him to the ground and he begins to scream and confess.

 

“I-I-I couldn’t help myself!” he said. “It was the tastiest hot dog I’d ever seen! I had to have it even if it meant… surprising someone. Everything else was as you’d said, I just happened to see the defendant and threw the blame on him. I regret my actions and accept the consequences!”

 

—------------

After Mr. Saw It is taken into custody, the Judge begins to issue his final ruling. “Mr. Wright, that was a spectacular and wild first trial. Who would’ve believed the culprit committed such a heinous act over a hot dog, as delicious as it might have been. I expect great things from you in the future!”

 

The narrator jumps in to explain that, unfortunately, we ran out of time for the final scenes of critical backstory and plot details for later parts of the show, so we’ll just shoehorn them into a filler episode later. You’re not gonna believe who the victim of surprise is next week on Ace Attorney!

 

(Promo plays that blatantly show it’s Mia)

4Kids: Goddammit Guys

 

  • God Himself 1
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