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The Seed That Soaked up SpongeBob’s Nose Dripping


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Longing for its master, it was quick to sprout once it got the snot-tear nourishment it so honestly craved, even making loud slurping noises to confirm it. What do you think? Inanimate object or living plant organism? Squidward’s house has been shown on many occasions coming to life, even having its security system take over it and a mrenter like disembodied voice coming out of it. Has this pineapple had longing feelings ever since its seed of the original pineapple that was sucked away by the nematodes still have feelings for him all these years later? If SpongeBob was to get another pineapple would the seed now fully grown into an Young Adult fruit get extremely jealous? Only time and 13 more seasons of the show will tell, I assume.

wait No No... the replacement has already begun. I wonder how the seed felt.

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The pineapple seed—like all fruits-to-be—was a living being, yet I don't think it ever found true happiness. I imagine it was left to chase the high of being cummed on with icky sponge boogers for the rest of its lifespan, waiting patiently for episodes that could give it prominence again. 


And so it received another one years later, but this where I mark the start of the pineapple seed's crashing decline. The abuse it suffered under these three strange gay men would only worsen its painful identity crisis. Why are they mistreating me so? Are canned fruit homes the new norm? Do I need to spend the rest of its life competing with synthetically grown Ananas comosus? Never again would it feel the caress of living, rushing life through its roots—and it knew.


It was just too much. It accepted its fate and chose to burn out rather than fade away, defying the future of false fruits wrapped in tin containers. But was it even worth it?



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