Jump to content
Clappy

Best and Worst of Entertainment 2018 Edition: The Lists Awaken

Recommended Posts

It’s that time of the year again.  It’s the seventh year of the year end entertainment lists.  Welcome to list season!

For those of you who are new around here or are discovering this annual topic for the first time, this topic is for the members of SBC to share the best and worst lists of 2018 media.  Whether it be movies, music, television, animation...shoot Prez even wanted to do commercials one year.

As always, these lists are for fun.  Feel free to share your opinions as always and sit back and enjoy the show.

For my lists this year, I’m doing something different with my television lists since I was without cable for the entire year and relied practically on streaming services.  What will I be doing instead?  Well you guys will have to tune in to find out.

Thanks for reading and participating guys and I hope you enjoy my 2018 year end lists when they arrive and I look forward to reading yours as well. :)

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Alright, so once again, my animation list is going to take months worth of time and finalizing just like with my list for the past year that I've only just published two months ago. However, I guarantee that I should get it out at least before August of next year.

Meanwhile, I'm going to throw a bit of a curve ball and publish another countdown list for music besides my personal top/bottom 10 hits of the year. On top of that, I will also promise another list, which will be exclusive to my blog since it's long overdue. Most of you should know what that might be.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh fuck I can do an animation list? 

Unlike most other shit I’ve seen essentially every animated film in theaters this year besides like 1 or 2.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, BenPaz said:

Oh fuck I can do an animation list? 

Unlike most other shit I’ve seen essentially every animated film in theaters this year besides like 1 or 2.

Yeah.  Steel does animation lists every year.

6 hours ago, Goobz said:

I want to participate in this, but I kinda like everything. :blush:

You don't have to do worst lists if you don't want to.  There are plenty of people like WhoBob and Katniss who only do best lists.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, with the end of 2018 coming close, there’s no better way to celebrate the month of December than to write a retrospective list on some of the worst and best of entertainment to come out of this year. 2018 wasn’t a particularly great year for me personally, but I have been feeling a lot better than I did back in 2017. This time around, the first list to come from me is different. It will be my way of killing time before I prepare my top/bottom 10 for the year-end Hot 100 list, and before I have seen enough material that I can work with for my respective animation list for several months to come. I’ve said it before that I’m going to write up another music-related countdown. And what it will be, you ask? I will be ranking every song that charted during the 2018 chart year for Billboard’s Alternative Songs chart (December 2017-November 2018 to specify).

Just to reiterate, I am going to rank every charting song during the 52/53 week period, all 158 songs in that total. I’ll be going along with that setup because the genre charts are usually of shorter quantity than the Hot 100 itself. I’ve been meaning to talk more about this particular genre chart, most especially this year for the alternative charts, so I thought why not talk about my thoughts on this very topic? And because the Alternative Songs chart of 2018 in full is still something lesser than the year-end Hot 100 lists, anything goes with my rankings here in contrast to my rankings for the latter. Hypothetically speaking if I had covered the previous year for the Alternative charts and if there’s a repeat for this year that I put in the top/bottom 10 for the previous year and still liked/loathed enough to put it on my list for 2018, I will have it in either list twice. Also, in this setup, both my worst and best lists are in one, separate spoiler tab.

Anyways, let’s talk about 2018 for the Alternative Songs chart. How can I best sum it up? For sure, it felt like a very transitional year for the Alternative Songs chart and for alternative radio as well. I would keep in mind that Alternative is not exclusively a rock genre. While the chart itself was named Modern Rock first, the alternative charts opening doors to different alternative genres is something that’s not new to me. 2018 is one of those years where the alternative charts felt absolutely varied. Over the course of the year, we had songs that were categorized as alternative rock, indie rock, indie pop, blues rock, southern rock, art rock, indie folk, dream pop, reggae, psychedelic pop/rock, dance-rock, post-punk revival, punk, alternative dance, alternative hip hop, alternative R&B, electronic, future bass, house, funk, neo-soul, synthpop, new wave, glam rock, hard rock, baroque pop, emo, covers, post-grunge leftovers, and even ska punk making somewhat of a return. Since quite a while now, the alternative charts have been evolving to become a chart that is open to a slew of genres and artists that can be considered as alternative. Meanwhile, it has become safe for me to say that indie pop and indie rock have both become the most dominant force on the alternative radio format.

I’ve also been meaning to talk about 2018 for the alternative charts more in-depth because I feel like not since ten years ago that the charts hit quite a slump in quality like this year. I’m not saying that it was an AWFUL year for alternative music, there was still a lot of great music. However, like with my year-end countdown lists, I’m starting with the songs that I felt were the most atrocious.

 

Steel Ranks the Alternative Songs Hits of 2018

 

Worst:

Spoiler

 

I love Muse. They have stuck with me as my absolute favorite band and I’d be willing to defend any song of theirs that is usually considered as underwhelming by some. However, until the band’s Simulation Theory era, I had to accept the fact that even such a great band like Muse will churn out a song that even I will find to be bad. It’s really going to hurt me to put one of their songs on a bottom 10 list of my own, but here it goes…

10. Something Human / Muse

It’s an understatement to say that “Something Human” is the least Muse-sounding song in the band’s discography. I don’t have a problem with any particular rock group testing the waters with a different genre or leaning towards a softer sound, but what Muse has done for this song just doesn’t work for me at all. Muse, most of the time, is about grandiose, they’re about buildup, and they’re about leaving their listeners invested and pulsating. In addition, the band’s softer songs tend to give their listeners a spacey feeling and allow them to see the splendor of Matt’s vocals and symphonic instrumentation.

Listening to this song, I was waiting for it to build up to something greater to keep me invested, but it doesn’t. It started off as a very droning, bland synthpop song, and I’m still left with this impression at the end. While I can at least understand that the band was going for a nostalgic 80’s sound, but what doesn’t help with the production is the drum snares being in the blend. While Matt’s voice is still as great as ever, the lyrics don’t overlap with the song’s tone. Oh, and how about that music video? I already joked about it once when I said it looked like that the people editing the video were given the wrong audio ‘cause when I think about Matt going on an adventure to return a video cassette to an old, abandoned video rental store in a desolate wasteland before turning into a beast, this isn’t the kind of song that would play in mind.

Matt Bellamy himself said he personally liked the song and it was pretty much a response to those who thought that Muse were nothing more than ‘over the top.’ It’s good on him that he likes it, but still, on the softer side of things, I’ve seen him and the rest of the band do so much better.

 

 

I’ll admit it that I’ve over-romanticized my hatred of this group, but I still stand by my opinion that they are one of the worst current pop bands. But wait, if I’m calling them a pop band, then what are they doing on the alternative charts? Well, their brand of pop music is “interesting” to say the least, so let’s make room for one particular band known as Adam, Jack, and Ryan….

9. Burn the House Down / AJR

There isn’t anything more that I can say to convince anyone how awful their music is based on my experience with the album “The Click.” Just to reiterate my thoughts on AJR, their music sounds absolutely obnoxious to my ears. Their production work either comes off as poorly handled or overdone, they are awful at harmonizing, and sometimes their songwriting can come off as dickish, specifically in songs such as “I’m Not Famous,” “Three-Thirty,” and “No Grass Today.” If that’s not convincing enough, Spectrum Pulse did make a review of the album, and it is by far the only album that he ever gave his lowest possible rating.

Just so you all know, I’ve been thinking about leaving this song alone while forming my two lists, but I’ve had to come back to this a few times to see whether or not I would find it bad or still find it incredibly mediocre. In the end, I’ve decided that this song, much like “The Click” as a whole, is nothing better. Oh, and for those who think “Sober Up” is just a fine song, don’t worry, it’s nowhere on my bottom 10 nor is it anywhere on my ‘awful’ bracket. Anyways, “Burn the House Down” is about the Met brothers being sick of dealing with the awful news that they come across and want to take a stand against the turmoil that their country is facing, saying that they “gon’ burn the whole house down.” In other words, just leave it to AJR to make a politically-charged song…that’s about nothing. There’s nothing else to attain from the song except that it’s a political protest except in the bridge that involves AJR thinking of having to lead their march with every stranger from Twitter to end the corruption, which yeah, that line doesn’t help curb my thoughts on the song.

Aside from the vague message, some other problems that I’ve had with the song include the increasingly overproduced chorus and that obnoxious horn section. If there’s anything that I can complement, I do like the bass groove, so don’t think I’m saying that AJR is all bad. Sometime in the future I’d like to see them improve musically, because if they don’t, then I want to this group to be left in 2017 and 2018. One thing’s for sure, I don’t want to have to talk about them again.

 

 

8. Rescue Me / Thirty Seconds to Mars

After going on a bit of tangent on one band that makes my skin crawl, here’s another mini-rant on another band that makes my skin crawl: Thirty Seconds to Mars. I can understand why some people like the group, and I can also understand why some others hate them. I cannot lie by saying that I never liked the band’s music because I have a bit of a soft spot for “Kings and Queens” and I used to like “The Kill” quite a lot until diving more into the band’s discography to realize the problems that I have with the band. Thirty Seconds to Mars is one of the most pretentious sounding rock groups that I’ve heard. Their songwriting can come off as overly angsty or trying so hard to be deep and thought-provoking while Jared Leto tries too hard to sell his emotions whenever he belts, making me dislike his singing voice and feel like that he should just stick to his acting career.

“Rescue Me” is a song from the band’s most recent album, “America,” considered to be such an embarrassingly bad album to the point where I believe that even some of the biggest fans of the group would find it a waste of their musical talents. The problems that I have with “Rescue Me” is more of the same problems that I have with Thirty Seconds to Mars in general: it’s overdramatic and Leto’s vocals are too pitchy, but there are a few things about it that add to this atrocity such as the bland trap percussion to prove the band’s lack of identity for the album, and of course the equally generic, but also blaring drop. Yet, this isn’t even the worst hit from “America” that I have to cover.

 

 

7. Vacation / Dirty Heads

Although I have my limits when it comes to reggae in alternative rock, I have a bit of a soft spot towards Dirty Heads. There hasn’t been a song of theirs that I’ve detested from the group until they came out with “Vacation” last year. “Vacation” is nothing more than alternative’s answer to “The Lazy Song,” and the end result is a mind-numbingly dumb song to sit through, for its dull chorus, its bland flows and percussion, and just the lazy vibes I get from it, but not the good kind of lazy. Even the music video feels insultingly dumb, like let’s have the principal from Saved by the Bell lip-synching to the song and goofing off around the school, throwing down a couple of crutches in the auditorium and such, so let’s make it quick because he’s also scheduled for the shooting of the “Young, Dumb & Broke” video because in the grand scheme of life we’re all on vacation and love our occupation.

This definitely isn’t the kind of laid-back music that I would like, but hey, if any of you like this laid-back yet inane song, then good for you.

 

 

6. broken / lovelytheband

This song just got worse for me the more that I’ve become exposed to it. This waste of an alternative hit not only spent more than 52 weeks on the chart, but is also the biggest alternative hit of the year and has gotten more play from Billboard than another crossover rock hit, “Sit Next to Me.” The synth tones were catchy at first, but now they are absolutely annoying to listen to. I’m also no fan of Collins’ vocals, who I feel his tone and inflection is like a cross between Adam Levine and Pierre Bouvier. Lastly, “I like that you’re broken, broken like me” doesn’t sound like a good pick-up line, nor am I a fan of the narrative when it comes to the fact that it’s pretty much about hooking up with a manic pixie dream girl during a party. Sooner than later, I’d like to see this going away from the alternative charts, since it has definitely overstayed its welcome.

 

 

5. Rx (Medicate) / Theory of a Deadman

Dear alternative radio: STOP. MAKING. THEORY OF A DEADMAN. A THING. Surprisingly, it’s only this low on my list since I could think of far worse songs from this awful band. However, almost every trope of a typical bad ToaDM song is present in “Rx.” Just listen to it and I wouldn’t have to justify much about why I hate it. Also, just a little reminder, before they scored another hit on Alternative Songs with “Rx,” this was their previous charting hit there:

Now you know why I want them to go away so badly.

 

 

Hey alternative radio, can you damage my eardrums?

4. Blood // Water / grandson

Thanks, I appreciated that.

 

 

3. Kamikaze / Walk the Moon

Never would I thought that I would have to rank a song from Walk the Moon this low, but…the sheer tastelessness of the song is so astonishing, and of all songs that the band chooses to follow up “One Foot” with, this is what they chose? From what I can gather, this song is about the singer’s attraction for a girl making him feel like a Kamikaze, which for the record, is defined as a Japanese aircraft tasked for suicidal attacks. The singer does know what he’s talking about yet we’re supposed to buy this and lines like “this is suicidal, honey” and “going down with my wings on fire” as attractive. What adds insult to injury is that “Kamikaze” itself is essentially a cod reggae tune that has to include Nicholas Petricca putting on a phony inflection in his voice. While I’m still on topic of the singer, I don’t tend to have a problem with his vocals, but even his crooning on here doesn’t sound very good. Oh, and how about his brief rap verse on the bridge? Ugh, overall this song just makes me sick to my stomach and it’s not sexy in the slightest. Walk the Moon, you’re not 311 and you never were, so don’t ever pretend to be a band like them again.

 

 

I said that I was going to talk about another song from Thirty Seconds to Mars at some point, so here we are…

2. Dangerous Night / Thirty Seconds to Mars

This song serves as a strong example to “bad is the absence of good.” This is such a hollow shell of a song to the point where I feel like a part of my soul is lost every time I hear it. Exaggeration aside, there is absolutely nothing interesting about “Dangerous Night,” and it is funny when you think that this was coming from a band that usually tries so hard to be seen as deep and meaningful. It’s generic radio fodder all across the board. The songwriting and the electronic production both feel redundant. It’s a kind of song that can be written by just about anyone. Even Jared Leto’s vocals sound like it could be from anyone else. I mean, there must be someone else who got their hands on this, and there is someone else who has produced this song, but whom?

Zedd.

OF COURSE! Who else would be involved in making generic pop songs than the man who makes a living off of them and has the ability to reduce any music artist to almost nothing? Now, I actually do not think that Zedd is the main problem here, as it should be clear that the band itself has pretty much reduced their selves in the song more than Zedd ever could beforehand. Still though, what a dangerous combination to land Thirty Seconds to Mars another spot on my bottom 10.

 

 

The whole “bad is the absence of good” principle also applies to the final song on my bottom 10. Who could possibly rank this low in my books? Well…who else could it be besides Judah & The Lion?

1. Going to Mars / Judah & The Lion

That exclamation point next to that song title in the video goes to show how it desperate it is to be liked.

Most first impressions made towards this group were that they were a poor man’s Mumford & Sons. At most, Judah & The Lion are a folk band, but they combine other influences into their music like hip hop. At the first, I understand the comparisons, but up to this point where “Going to Mars” is on the alternative charts, I’ve felt like that there’s some advice that I need to give: comparing Judah & The Lion to Mumford & Sons is an insult to Mumford and any other folk groups like them, because I’ve realized it through “Going to Mars” that Judah doesn’t sound anything like Mumford. Heck, there can’t even be an easy comparison between Judah and Marcus’ vocals, as Judah’s vocals sound more like it belongs in an active rock band.

Anyways, as for the song itself, there isn’t really anything impressive about it. It’s incredibly dull, it’s uninspiring, it’s uncharismatic, the production work is muddled especially at the climax, the vocal layering before the choruses sound atrocious, and it’s hard to see for whom it’s made for beside the band itself. There’s nothing much else that I could add except that this band is currently at the top of my list of acts that I want to see less of in the near future on the alternative charts. And I’m not saying this just because of this song in particular. Their two previous charting singles were atrocious as well.

With that wrapping up my bottom 10, it’s time that I shift my focus towards my top 10. If you think the Alternative Songs chart this year is looking very bad, wait until you see the good things that I have to say about my top ten.

 

 

Best:

Spoiler

 

Considering how devoted I am towards alternative rock and alternative music in general, believe me when I say that I’ve had to make some painful cuts for this top ten. Anyways, my first entry to my top ten belongs to none other than a band that will probably never top their debut album, but has remained a consistently great-sounding band for years…

10. Always Ascending / Franz Ferdinand

“Always Ascending” is an example of Franz Ferdinand still being capable of showing more than their usual limitations. For the most part, the song lives up to its own title. It uses an interesting foundation to set up the tone of the song, in form of the Shepard tone sound to exemplify the build-up of the song as well as being a good fit towards the song’s subject matter. The buildup makes the song feel more intense, punchy, and danceable all at once the more that it progresses. The way how the song starts with a smooth piano intro coupled by Kapranos’ brooding vocals is a nice touch. Overall, it’s a very funky, unpredictable, and well-crafted song.

 

 

This next one is going to be my most outrageous choice on my list. I haven’t listened to their debut album in full, but the critics have really hounded on it, which somewhat makes the particular group seem very divisive. No matter what anyone has to say against this song, it’s still earned a spot on my own list…

9. When the Curtain Falls / Greta Van Fleet

Calling this band a Led Zeppelin clone has become a huge understatement to the point where it’s become common knowledge to point out that they sound a lot like them. Even while I can agree that they are not very distinct in terms of style and personality, I could say the same for other similar contemporaries that make retrograde style music like Jet, The Struts, and Foxy Shazam, and yet I’ve barely seen anyone bat an eye towards those bands, so I wonder what’s so unsettling about this group in particular.

If there’s any reason why I like “When the Curtain Falls” so much, it is not generally because I feel impressed at how well they can emulate Led Zeppelin or any other old, similar band. You know how in my bottom 10 that I was clearly expressing discern over some of alternative’s more downbeat and dampened hits? This song, along with “Highway Tune” felt like a breath of fresh air to me. It’s energetic, it’s fun, and it’s a nice throwback to classic rock. On top of that, there is some genuine talent here. I loved Josh Kiszka’s vocals, I loved the guitar tones, and I thought the guitar solo was pretty stellar. I don’t know if anyone will objectify the songwriting, but I don’t think that it’s bad either.

Is Greta Van Fleet an original? Not so much. Does that make the song bad for me? Definitely not. Do I feel like I could lose patience with the band’s music? Maybe I could, but maybe I won’t because I have liked what I’ve heard from the group so far.

 

 

8. Nobody Speak / DJ Shadow featuring Run the Jewels

If you saw both of those names being attached to a song and happen to be a big fan of both acts, then I know what you’re thinking. There’s no way you can screw up a powerhouse collaboration between DJ Shadow and Run the Jewels. And that’s the main gist as to why this song is in my top ten. While I haven’t gotten into much of DS and RtJ’s music (but I’ve really been meaning to), I can easily understand the love for both artists and it’s hard to deny that their chemistry in “Nobody Speak” is a little too good. Furthermore, the two artists really show something exceptional. El-P and Killer Mike both deliver solid flows while DJ Shadows boats a guitar-driven melody, a drum and bass funk groove, and as well as a glitchy, yet intense instrumentation later into the song. I can’t quite call this the best work for both DJ Shadow and Run the Jewels already, but seeing them on the alternative chart was and still is a delight.

 

 

This has been around for a while but I feel like addressing one trend in music: female empowerment songs by men. Two recent and noticeable examples that I can pull out are “Female” by Keith Urban and “Girls Like You” by Maroon 5. While this is generally a good way to express respect towards women, both songs fail in what they try to accomplish. “Female” doesn’t work for being a half-baked mess, preaching to us that the issue among women needs to be fixed without illustrating its message much beyond that and not feeling very empowering in the process, while “Girls Like You” doesn’t work for typically sounding like the same old Maroon 5 song, but also because as a female empowerment song, it provides absolutely nothing new to the table. If you’re going to empower women, show them some power, which is why my next entry is a song of that type but in a more positive light, from none other than Hozier…

7. Nina Cried Power / Hozier featuring Mavis Staples

Okay, to be fair, this song could empower anyone as it’s simply a tribute to protest songs from days of old, but it also centers on the ongoing battle for equality and it name checks a good number of female singers from the past like Nina Simone, Patti Smith, Billie Holiday, and of course, special guest Mavis Staples, whose vocals on the song are as much of a highlight as Hozier’s raw, emotional delivery.

On the Alternative Songs chart, “Nina Cried Power” only peaked at #31. It was only for an EP, but it’s still a crying shame that it wasn’t a bigger hit on alternative radio, since it gives me the solemn reminder that Hozier would continuously be treated as a one-hit wonder. Overall, it’s an empowering, underrated song from two otherwise underrated musical artists.

 

 

What can I really say about my choice for this next one? When Paramore makes a great song, it can easily overwhelm me.

6. Fake Happy / Paramore

“Fake Happy” sees a near-complete departure from the band’s usual pop punk sound, which is probably why it didn’t do as well as “Hard Times” on alternative and rock radio. The same can be said towards most of the other tracks on After Laughter, where it mainly focuses on a synthpop and new wave sound. I assume this is due to bassist Jeremy Davis’ departure from the group that the band has decided to open a different door, and if I hadn’t already made myself clear on my praise towards After Laughter, I’ve come to really adore this new direction that Paramore has took.

The song entails Hayley’s inner frustrations with pretending to feel what she wants to feel and the surrounding thought that everyone else is faking their emotions. As someone who has feelings about faking happy or any other kind of feeling, the narrative of the song is very relatable. However, most of my merits towards the song is for the music within it. While I wouldn’t consider it the best song from After Laughter, it is certainly one of the catchiest. To specify, the synth melody is what always brings me back to it. The chorus also strikes a chord on me as well, whereas Hayley lets out those inner emotions over her previous and more delicate verses. Great song from an otherwise great album, nothing more that I need to add here.

 

 

5. Lash Out / Alice Merton

Nothing got me feeling really agitated this year quite like a song that’s nothing more than about wanting to let go of your bottled up anger and well…lash out. While it doesn’t speak many words, the song still flat out rocks. “Lash Out” excels in its infectious guitar groove, heavy percussion, Alice’s impassioned vocals that I’ve likened to that of Florence Welch’s, and the singer’s aggravated personality to keep any listener moving.

 

 

When I first heard “Give Yourself a Try,” I was feeling skeptical about the direction that The 1975 was going with their new album as they were pivoting less towards radio success and more towards making art. It took a while for this other radio hit of theirs to strike a chord on me, so allow me to say that I’ve grown to love it...if we made it.

4. Love It If We Made It / The 1975

I don’t think there will ever be a time where I cannot include a song by The 1975 on my alternative top 10. What AJR got wrong with “Burn the House Down” in delivering a political message, The 1975 does right in actually establishing what they’re protesting against while the lyrics include quite a lot of what’s wrong with the world in general: drug abuse, pollution, Donald Trump, warfare, and several other political and humanitarian issues. How this presentation all manages to work and doesn’t come off as too preachy is in due to Healy’s impassionate and dominate vocal delivery.

On top of the song’s message, there’s the line “I’d love it if we made it” to express concern with living in the world’s current social climate while also clinging onto hope that the modern world will eventually get better. Aside from the song’s strong political subtext, there’s also the musical arrangement that I’ve come to appreciate. “Love It If We Made It” has a unique structure that starts off with simple synth tones and Healy’s intense vocals, and then at the middle it evolves with added electronic funk instrumentation.

While the songwriting isn’t all very cohesive, “Love It If We Made It” still manages to be an innovative, anthemic, oddly danceable, and thought-provoking song.

 

 

3. I Hope You’re Happy / Blue October

Now let’s lean more towards a song with some more cohesion. This turn-around from Blue October’s typical active rock sound to a more intimate, new wave song still comes off as strange to me, but then again, the band has experimented with other styles before. Anyways, what the band has done for this song manages to work very well and impress me. As I’ve said of this before, it’s a charming and intimate song directed towards an old flame. Production-wise, the synth tones on the song sound very pleasant and dreamlike, matching the tone of Furstenfeld’s vocal delivery.

Seeing how very capable that the band is in challenging themselves with a different style like in “I Hope You’re Happy,” I feel like I could expect some more great things from the band…well, at least until they followed it up with “Daylight,” which was more of their old shtick, on top of not being good musically, so I’m feeling skeptical now.

 

 

2. Run for Cover / The Killers

While “The Man” proved the band’s consistent excellence, “Run for Cover” is where I feel most of the band’s capabilities all align. The result is a complete banger that combines the band’s post-punk and new wave sounds spectacularly, while dealing with a dark theme in domestic violence, whereas the character is urged to escape from her abusive relationship. Another interesting detail to note is that while Bob Marley’s “Redemption Song” is reference within in the song, it is also used as an interpolation. From Brandon Flowers’ powerful vocals to the intense songwriting, to the final stretch of the song, there’s quite a lot to like about “Run for Cover,” but yet this isn’t my number one pick, so what could that be?

 

 

If I were to make my choice for the top spot, it would be my personal favorite for a variety of reasons. That was the decision I’ve made after going back to this particular song several times. My choice for the best charting alternative song has given me a lot to say about it. It is one that not only excels in its production work, it is also one that I’ve resonated with most. Building up all this suspense to tell you all what it is, I think most of you would be surprised if I said that the band representing my #1 pick is…twenty one pilots.

1. My Blood / twenty one pilots

Twenty One Pilots is the type of band that does not belong to a specific genre whatsoever. Of course, they are categorized as either ‘alternative’ or ‘indie,’ but their discography speaks more than just those two labels. The musical duo represents whatever music they want to represent. “Holding on to You:” a blend of rap and indie pop. “House of Gold:” indie folk. “Car Radio:” conscious hip hop. “Tear in My Heart:” electropop. “Heavydirtysoul:” breakbeat. “Jumpsuit:” hard alternative rock. “Nico and the Niners:” a blend of reggae and trip-hop. Then, of course, there are also songs of theirs that are mishmashes of different styles like “Ride” and the very song that I’m going to be talking about in-depth.

I’m sure that some of you are thinking, “Seriously, this over “Jumpsuit?” You ranked this over “Run for Cover?” You ranked this over everything else on your top ten?” So, let me explain what I liked so much about “My Blood.” Let’s start off with the music. As I’ve mentioned before, it’s a wide blend of different styles, and I think they all sound amazing. It starts off with a slow-burner: a delicate, percussion-driven intro before it builds up to a hard funk instrumentation to establish the singer’s tone in which he tells the person directed of how loyal he is towards them. Then there’s the main chorus where it shifts into a lighthearted disco sound while Tyler Joseph’s vocals transition into more of a falsetto to express his support towards the person directed (in addition to showing his singing capabilities). Afterwards comes what I think is the most significant bit about the song, where the harder funk instrumentation returns while Joseph brings about his usual hip hop influences to create a rapid-fire verse to exemplify more of how loyal he is to the person directed. Finally, there’s the bridge that starts of mellow and contains an electronic synth build-up to its most prevailing chorus line.

However, the production music isn’t the strongest highlight of the song. Most of my merits go to the narrative. It’s more than just about undying loyalty; it’s also about staying on the side of someone you’re close to who has been deserted by others. This is the kind of narrative that speaks about the person that I would try and tend to be. Furthermore, I think of “My Blood” as a pretty subtle form of the “this is how much you mean to me” kind of song. So, to reiterate my thoughts on the song, it’s imitate, emotional, funky, innovative, and accessible in a lot of the right ways, and that’s why it’s my top favorite charting alternative hit of the year.

 

 

Full Rankings:

Spoiler

 

1. “My Blood” – twenty one pilots

2. “Run for Cover” – The Killers

3. “I Hope You’re Happy” – Blue October

4. “Love It If We Made It” – The 1975

5. “Lash Out” – Alice Merton

6. “Fake Happy” – Paramore

7. “Nina Cried Power” – Hozier featuring Mavis Staples

8. “Nobody Speak” – DJ Shadow featuring Run the Jewels

9. “When the Curtain Falls” – Greta Van Fleet

10. “Always Ascending” – Franz Ferdinand

11. “Numb” – Meg Myers

12. “She’s Kerosene” – The Interrupters

13. “Creature Comfort” – Arcade Fire

14. “Pink Lemonade” – James Bay

15. “The Sky is a Neighborhood” – Foo Fighters

16. “The Gold” – Manchester Orchestra

17. “Can We Hang On ?” – Cold War Kids

18. “Los Ageless” – St. Vincent

19. “Turn” – The Wombats

20. “Say Amen (Saturday Night)” – Panic! at the Disco

21. “Over and Over and Over” – Jack White

22. “&Run” – Sir Sly

23. “Jumpsuit” – twenty one pilots

24. "Stuck" - The Aces

25. “Best Friend” – Sofi Tukker featuring Nervo, The Knocks, and Alisa Ueno

26. “One Foot” – Walk the Moon

27. “Pressure” – Muse

28. “Highway Tune” – Greta Van Fleet

29. “Pictures of Girls” – The Wallows

30. “No Roots” – Alice Merton

31. “The Last of the Real Ones” – Fall Out Boy

32. “Connected by Love” – Jack White

33. “Sit Next to Me” – Foster the People

34. “House on Fire” – Rise Against

35. “Far Away Truths” – Albert Hammond Jr.

36. “Adore” – Amy Shark

37. “One More Light” – Linkin Park

38. “Up All Night” - Beck

39. “Passion” – AWOLNATION

40. “Astronaut (Something About Your Love) – Mansionair

41. “Get Out” – CHVRCHES

42. “Northern Lights” – Death Cab for Cutie

43. “Quarter Past Midnight” – Bastille

44. “May I Have This Dance” – Francis and the Lights featuring Chance the Rapper

45. “I Love You, Will You Marry Me” – YUNGBLUD

46. “Wish I Knew You” – The Revivalists

47. “Feel It Still” – Portugal. The Man

48. “Four Out of Five” – Arctic Monkeys

49. “Ride or Die” – The Knocks featuring Foster the People

50. “Silvery Sometimes (Ghosts) – The Smashing Pumpkins

51. “Visions” – Dirty Heads featuring Kitten

52. “Hunger” – Florence + The Machine

53. “Humility” – Gorillaz featuring George Benson

54. “Superposition” – Young the Giant

55. “1950” – King Princess

56. “Natural” – Imagine Dragons

57. “Doubt” – Joywave

58. “Shame” – Elle King

59. “Happy Man” – Jungle

60. “The Wanting” – J. Roddy Walston and the Business

61. “Fever Pitch” – Rainbow Kitten Surprise

62. “Thought Contagion” – Muse

63. “Come Together” – Gary Clark Jr.

64. “Thunder” – Imagine Dragons

65. “Live in the Moment” – Portugal. The Man

66. “Painkiller” – DREAMERS

67. “these are my friends” – lovelytheband

68. “We Fight” – Dashboard Confessional

69. “Black Holes (Solid Ground)” – The Blue Stones

70. “Worst Nites” – Foster the People

71. “Give Yourself a Try” – The 1975

72. “Sorry” – Nothing but Thieves

73. “So Tied Up” – Cold War Kids featuring Bishop Briggs

74. “Home” – morgxn featuring Walk the Moon

75. “Screws” – DREAMERS

76. “Gold Rush” – Death Cab for Cutie

77. “Everybody Wants to Be Famous” – Superorganism

78. “Clean Eyes” – SYML

79. “Dream” – Bishop Briggs

80. “Line of Sight” – ODESZA featuring Mansionair and WYNNE

81. “High Hopes” – Panic! at the Disco

82. “Colors” – Beck

83. “Body Talks” – The Struts (solo for featuring Kesha)

84. “Guiding Light” – Mumford & Sons

85. “White Flag” – Bishop Briggs

86. “I Feel Like I’m Drowning” – Two Feet

87. “Electrified” – Just Loud

88. “Everybody’s Lonely” – Jukebox the Ghost

89. “Golden Dandelions” – Barns Courtney

90. “Loving Is Easy” – Rex Orange County featuring Benny Sings

91. “you should see me in a crown” – Billie Eilish

92. “Baby” – Bishop Briggs

93. “Make It Up As I Go” – Mike Shinoda featuring K. Flay

94. “Simplify” – Young the Giant

95. “Ahead of Myself” – X Ambassadors

96. “Can’t Deny Me” – Pearl Jam

97. “You Worry Me” – Nathaniel Rateliff and The Night Sweats

98. “All My Friends” – The Revivalists

99. “The Line” – Foo Fighters

100. “Miracle” – CHVRCHES

101. “Silver Lining” – Mt. Joy

102. “Tidal Wave” – Portugal. The Man

103. “Ohio” – Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

104. “I Miss Those Days” – Bleachers

105. “Giver” – K. Flay

106. “Happy Hour” – Weezer

107. “Two High” – Moon Taxi

108. “Peace Sign” – The Front Bottoms

109. “Preacher Man” – The Driver Era

110. “Happier” – Marshmello featuring Bastille

111. “Back Down” – Bob Moses

112. “Nevermind” – Dennis Lloyd

113. “World Gone Mad” – Bastille

114. “Revolutionary” – Robert DeLong

115. “GET UP” – Shinedown

116. “Angela” – The Lumineers

117. “Crossing a Line” – Mike Shinoda

118. “Good Morning” – Max Frost

119. “Africa” – Weezer

120. “Lay It on Me” – Vance Joy

121. “Back Seat Driver (Spirit Guide)” – Bear Hands

122. “Alfie’s Song (Not So Typical Love Song)” – Bleachers

123. “Everything Is Alright” – The Glorious Sons

124. “Whole Wide World” – Cage the Elephant

125. “Handyman” – AWOLNATION

126. “I Only Lie When I Love You” – Royal Blood

127. “Legendary” – Welshly Arms

128. “Sober Up” – AJR featuring Rivers Cuomo

129. “Falling Down” – Lil Peep and XXXTentacion

130. “Every Step That I Take” – Tom Morello featuring Portugal. The Man and Whethan

131. “Where’s My Love” – SYML

132. “Fast Talk” – Houses

133. “Celebrate” – Dirty Heads featuring The Unlikely Candidates

134. “Daylight” – Blue October

135. “Saturday Sun” – Vance Joy

136. “Walk on Water” – Thirty Seconds to Mars

137. “Ghost” – Badflower

138. “Can’t Knock the Hustle” – Weezer

139. “Scary Love” – The Neighbourhood

140. “One Night Only” – The Struts

141. “You’re Somebody Else” – flora cash

142. “Song About You” – Mike Posner

143. “Zombie” – Bad Wolves

144. “Legends” – Sleeping with Sirens

145. “Believer” – Imagine Dragons

146. “Whatever It Takes” – Imagine Dragons

147. ““99”” – Barns Courtney

148. “Favorite Color Is Blue” – Robert DeLong featuring K. Flay

149. “Something Human” – Muse

150. “Burn the House Down” – AJR

151. “Rescue Me” – Thirty Seconds to Mars

152. “Vacation” – Dirty Heads

153. “broken” – lovelytheband

154. “Rx (Medicate)” – Theory of a Deadman

155. “Blood // Water” – grandson

156. “Kamikaze” – Walk the Moon

157. “Dangerous Night” – Thirty Seconds to Mars

158. “Going to Mars” – Judah & The Lion

 

 

Edited by Steel Sponge
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why is it that whenever I’m looking for best lists for new songs to check out, the #1 is something I’ve already listened to? (No, I will not spoil it, but I do like the song even if I’m not a huge fan of the band that made it.) Not blaming you personally, Steel, it’s just an odd coincidence I keep noticing.

Also, I listened to The 1975’s “Give Yourself a Try” (I know it’s not on either list, but you brought it up in the comments on your best list) and while the lyrics are interesting, the guitar riff sounds so close to Joy Division’s “Disorder” that I think the remaining members of Joy Division should sue, lol. Not a good first impression of the band, honestly. Then again, speaking of British rock legends, I’ve heard the 1975’s new album has been compared to friggin’ OK Computer, so I might listen to the whole thing to see if it lives up to the hype.

Also, haven’t heard anything from Run the Jewels (I really should, though) or much of anything DJ Shadow’s done since 2011, but the latter’s first two albums are pretty great, in my opinion. 

Either way, thanks for the recommendations!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, I'll be blunt. This isn't a list but I really, really want to talk about this show and why it's the best in animation that I've seen all year. Also spoilers.

 

 

I want to start off that I am inherently biased. Because I really don't pay attention to most modern animation that comes out. Yeah I still watch new episodes of Bob's Burgers and South Park but I really think that's it. Anyway, I love this show so much and it's run this year was the best in it's history and I'm starting to feel like it's something special, so here we go, my (extremely biased) best of animation choice for 2018 is:

MY HERO ACADEMIA SEASON 3

3Wqobmc.png

Wikipedia synopsis for those interested: "In a world where people with superpowers (known as "Quirks" (個性 Kosei)) are the norm, Izuku Midoriya has dreams of one day becoming a Hero, despite being bullied by his classmates for not having a quirk. After being the only one to try and save his childhood friend Katsuki Bakugo from a villain, All Might, the world's greatest hero, bestows upon him his own Quirk "One For All". The story follows Izuku's entrance into U.A. High School (雄英高校 Yūei Kōkō), a school that cultivates the next generation of superheroes. As Izuku and his new friends try to balance their Hero training with ordinary school duties, they must face new challenges including the League of Villains, an evil organization established by All Might's archenemy, All For One, to destroy all Heroes and take control of society."

I know what you're thinking: how is My Hero Academia starting to feel like something special? Because in all honesty, even I think, at face value, it's really not anything special. It's an action-adventure comedy shonen show with kids and powers and villains and shit and we've seen that a lot. However, what I think makes it special is it's role in not just the anime circles today, but also it's crossover appeal. I ain't even gonna try to sugarcoat the fact I fucking love anime, but my absolute favorite type is the action-adventure shonen stuff, no shame in admitting it. I fucking love Bleach, Naruto, DBZ, FMA (all time favorite). However, the current anime industry is in a huge fucking rut, something that even Miyazaki I believe warned us about is that anime is becoming all too fanservicy and derivative, two things this show is admittedly guilty of, and something I'm also not really in a position to say as pretty much all anime has some fanservice. However, what I miss is creators that told stories instead of trying to sell waifus to sexually confused 14 year old boys. Yeah, all anime has some fanservice but Bleach, Naruto, DBZ, and FMA never let fanservice distract them from telling a story. They wanted to tell a story and occasional fanservice came later in small increments usually, which using it conservatively is fine. My Hero Academia is just like this. It tells a fucking story and doesn't need a waifu to get people to view, and it's a bold move but one that's very appreciated as the show is becoming a worldwide phenomenon, almost like.. hmm.... Bleach, Naruto, DBZ... a lot of the most famous shonen anime of the last 30 or so years.

 

I really don't feel like I have to describe why crossover appeal is a selling point, but this show has some serious crossover appeal which is great. It's very blatant that superheroes are extremely popular right now, and this show is about superheroes. I've met people who don't like anime but can really get into this show just because they like superheroes. And it's not even the most complexed superhero story ever, it's about a school full of aspiring superheroes which has been done before (Sky High comes to mind), but what makes it special is it's characters and how genuine they are. This show really is derivative, but that's not bad because the writing is great and holds them all up. We've seen dorky protagonists like Deku, but the honest and amazing performance of him and his aspirations make him damn fun to watch, as well as his character development. Bakugo is as badass as antiheroes come, a spiky haired douchebag that turned into a loveable douchebag. Remember when he almost fucking destroyed the League Of Villains when they asked him if they wanted to join them? The dude wants to be a hero and help people, but he's got that hot headed douche persona that keeps him interesting. Obviously pretty much every character in the show is interesting and they all get time to shine, but those two are great examples of the characterization in this show. And even when personalities aren't the most interesting, we've got some badass powers to show for it. The powers in this show are so fucking cool and unique. 

 

This season we saw a fuckton. Bakugo got kidnapped by the League Of Villains, the UA dorms, the introduction of the Big Three (the three best students at UA), but of course the most defining moment in the season has to be All Might vs. All For One, a villain with a ton of build up as All Might's archenemy from the past. The fight was absolutely insane and made the show reach DBZ levels in insane fights, which is an awesome thing. And it of course it meant All Might would retire as a hero, with a very genuine scene where All Might and All For One have a talk following their fight. There's also been a lot of genuine emotion in this season, especially about Deku's mom's concern over Deku becoming a hero and All Might reassuring her; it had to be one of the most genuinely emotional scenes I've seen in an anime with how honest and sensical it is. Also the season also did get it's fair share of laid back, more comedic episodes to act as a great viewing detour from the action-oriented episodes. The episode where they moved into dorms was a really great laid back episode that had fun with using the show's characters and such and their interactions. Overall I don't have much wrong with this season as a whole, it always kept me engaged and waiting for the next episode. If I had one criticism the Provisional License Exam was kinda dragged out but it really wasn't bad. As this show goes on it just gets better and better as new characters are well introduced and implemented and we learn more about Class 1-A as well as the League Of Villains. This show is just such a fun watch, for not just anime fans or superhero fans, but anyone who likes adventure/underdog stories with cool powers and it's just such a fun show. I'd ask everyone to at least look into it because of it's crossover appeal, but if it's not your thing, I completely get it. But I can't wait to see what happens next with Class 1-A and the League Of Villains after this absolutely stellar season. I do know there's the manga, but I'm just gonna wait, I've already got a decent amount of manga I've been reading. But yeah, absolutely fantastic season, easily the best I've seen of animation this whole year.

Edited by MLG Vanilluxe
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

EDIT: Don't know why any of these YouTube videos aren't coming up.  Sorry guys, hopefully will get this fixed soon.

 

So yeah, how about 2018 hit music?

 

 

It sucked.  It really sucked.  I know I sound like I say this every other year but outside of 2014’s awful awful music, 2018 was the worst year because music doesn’t matter anymore.  Like I take a look at this year-end list and I think to myself, wait that was a single?  I thought it came from one of the god knows how many album bombs that came from this year?

And since we are an album listening society again, where does that put our usual source of singles?  Outdated.  Simply put, Top 40 stations are afraid to play trap music because that is clearly what’s popular no question.  Outside of Drake, Post Malone, Nicki Minaj, and Cardi B, you’re not going to see pop music even attempt to make Migos and Kendrick crossover unless they appear as guest artists.  And then you have iTunes, which I don’t know how many of you know this, but Apple is putting an end to it, or at least it’s current format, since streaming is the new trend.  And if our ploy for streaming is to stream the songs of only a limited amount of artists, then that sure was the case this year.

Look what I’m saying is this year’s Top 10 worst hit songs was not fun to write.  You know this was a bad year when I feel the exact same way about most of my worst list as I do the dishonorable mentions.  This year’s hit songs were a near perfect representation of depression.  Because I got no emotion while making this list.  I tried hart to force myself to rant about these songs but it wasn’t as fun as it used to be.  Let’s just get this over with since I unlocked all the Smash Bros characters in only three days.  Can I talk about that instead?  Please?

DISHONORABLE MENTIONS:

Spoiler

“rockstar” – Post Malone (featuring 21 Savage)

The massive success of this song is still baffling to me.  And nearly a year later it still wouldn’t go the hell away.  I think I’ve come to terms that I’ll never get what there is to like about this.  Doesn’t mean I don’t think it is freaking hot garbage either way.

 

“Walk It Talk It” – Migos (featuring Drake)

And the award for most annoying two seconds in a hit song of 2018.  Like I said, not the worst, just the most annoying.  I hate hate HATE that this is the chorus.  Just when I thought the Versace days were long past Migos, it’s like I’m in 2012 all over again.  At least Takeoff’s verse is easily the only good part of this song.  And I do like the video a lot.

 

“I Like Me Better” – Lauv

 Do I really hate this slog of a song this much?  I honestly don’t know and don’t really care if I do or not.  It somehow had huge chart success though lasting as long as it did in the bottom half of the charts practically 80% of its run and made my work playlist because god forbid they actually play something culturally relevant.  Yeah I don’t know who this song would even possibly remotely be for every time I hear it.  It’s like a cockroach that won’t die.

 

“Te Bote” – A Shit Ton of Latin Rappers

I’ve said in the past that I can’t really hate something I don’t completely understand.  And yeah I don’t get the appeal of Latin trap music.  Not because of the language barrier.  But because practically every song I’ve heard from the genre this year is whiny bitchfit after whiny bitchfit.  They can’t all be like this, can they?  This is no different.  It doesn’t have that god awful production work “Mi Gente” had to secure a spot on my official worst list.  But the fact that you had to have six people perform one song about how they dumped one girl in particular.  Jesus.  Lay it on any thicker why don’t you.  What a whiny bitchfit that goes on for seven fucking minutes….what the fuck?  There are episodes of SpongeBob that this is longer (and less interesting) than.

 

“Be Careful” – Cardi B

Do I really hate this song that much too?  Honestly, everything about this song is just okay.  But then we get to one of the worst choruses of the year and it earns its spot on the dishonorable mentions list.  Seriously, what kind of chorus is this?  Where’s the intensity?  Where’s the personality that I’ve come to expect from Cardi’s music?  How can you call this a song about scorching anyone who dares to mess with you and be this fucking limp?  Inexcusable.

 

“Outside Today” – YoungBoy Never Broke Again

I’m sorry to every rapper who I’ve ever criticized for having a god awful rap name.  This might just be the absolute worst.  And his material isn’t that much better.  You know for a rapper who is trying to dodge the police by not going outside, he sure has no problem flexing for…his pets?  Bitches?  I don’t know, this song sucks.

 

“Him & I” – G-Eazy & Halsey

It’s funny to see how dated this song has already become within the year it was released.  2003 Bonnie and Clyde you’re not.  Hell, if anything, you’re only making me like that song even more.  And if the post break-up songs that these two have released since then are a sign of things to come, god forbid please stop writing songs about each other.

 

“Mi Gente” – J Balvin & Willy William

What the fuck?  This charted again?  Why!?!?!  I will say this.  For still having one of the worst productions of all time, I will say this is at least more interesting than some of the other Latin trap that crossed over this year.

 

“Natural” – Imagine Dragons

This song gives me “Believer” flashbacks in the worst way.  Are we sure this isn’t the same song?  Be careful Imagine Dragons because you are dangerously treading Maroon 5 levels of ripping yourself off.

 

“Believer” – Imagine Dragons

Then again.  I’ll take “Believer” flashbacks over the actual song which also somehow charted the second year in a row.  Good lord, this was a bad year to be a hit single.

 

“Girls Like You” – Maroon 5 (featuring Cardi B)

Ladies and gentlemen, our Super Bowl halftime performers with their number one smash single…god how did we let this happen?  Almost want to put this on the list proper but Cardi B’s verse, as out of place as it is, still saves it for me.

 

“Meant to Be” – Bebe Rexha & Florida Georgia Line

Dull as dirt.  Consider this my annual honorary number eleven…

 

“GUMMO” – 6ix9ine

Nope, just kidding.  This is my honorary eleventh worst song of the year.  I know some of you were expecting this to make the list proper because of how much I dived into how incredibly uninteresting and untalented Tekashi is earlier this year in my only seasonal chart ranking of 2018.

But fucking hell, I can’t place this song on the list proper with all my might.  I like this beat.  It’s menacing.  It’s intimidating.  Shoot, the shouting works for the song too.  I just hate everything else about it so fucking much and 6ix9ine himself just has no star power.

 

 

Clappy's Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 2018

 

Spoiler

Starting off this countdown, correctly by not talking about music at all.  As I mentioned, I’m not going to be making a proper television list this year because of my year without cable.  I’ll instead be talking about all the shows I watched on streaming services this year, which includes shows on cable technically.  But I didn’t watch enough to make proper lists.  However, do you guys want to know what my worst show of 2018 is?

Yep.  My second best show of 2017 is my worst of 2018.  That’s how god awful this second season was.  Talk about ruining a great series.  Back on topic though, this show produced one of the biggest pop hits of this year and I fucking hate it.

 

10. “Back to You” – Selena Gomez

 

 

It’s become hard for me to recall whatever talent Selena Gomez once had with how hollow of a performer she has become.  2017 was where we enter a new chapter in Selena Gomez’s career.  Where her empty vessel personality found new success working with EDM producers.  And you know what, it makes sense.  Because so much of her music is void of personality, why not collaborate with a genre where that works in your favor?  Especially since her last few solo outings were all flopping like other pop acts have been doing as of late.

…okay I’ve been stalling long enough.  This song is fucking boring.  I’m so sick of Selena Gomez pretty much remaking the same damn song over and over again.  You all know which one I’m talking about.  This song is practically any other “Is it or isn’t it about Justin Bieber?” love song that she’s been doing for the past four or five years now.  It is all sugar cookie levels of bland boring mush.  And you know what, just because this an especially bad year, I was super close to just placing this on the dishonorable mentions list and calling it a day.  But then, something happens in this song and oh man…

https://ytcropper.com/cropped/ul5c13a8dd58a31

…that might be the worst drop in a mainstream pop song I’ve ever heard.  WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?  First off, did the drums just trip over themselves into that trainwreck a second early?  The guitar player sounds like he just walked into the studio, recorded itself over this production that should have been built up to a few measures earlier, and most importantly, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS SUPPOSE TO MAKE ME FEEL?  I guess that could be said for most drops these days, but this drop especially lacks absolutely no punch and is especially flavorless.  And while I bet an actual producer produced this weak ass shit, since Selena Gomez isn’t crediting the producer for a change, I’m putting the blame on her.  I bet she told the producers to give her a drop that masks how empty and hollow as she is.  Well it worked.

 

Spoiler

https://screenrant.com/fortnite-game-year-2018/

So I assume you all have seen by now the outrage of Fortnite winning video game of the year, pissing off a bunch of hardcore gamers who feel like that title belongs to Red Dead Redemption 2 or Super Smash Bros Ultimate (the game is barely out as of now guys, chill lmao...even though it's amazing).  Me personally, I don’t care.  I definitely get why it’s winning so many awards.  It transcended being just a video game to more than that.  It became a cultural phenomenon this year.  Hell, it spawned memes.

 

Yes this video was one of the many huge memes inspired by that victory dance.  And it made the song a hit.  And I fucking hate it.

 

9. “Plug Walk” – Rich the Kid

 

 

Yes 2018 was a breakout year for this guy, who has been cosigned by Kendrick Lamar of all people.  And…I don’t fucking get why.  He doesn’t stand out even the slightest bit.  This guy is so fucking basic that you could literally hypothesize what this song is going to be about and you’ll nail everything on the by the numbers trap song check list:
  

-Desaturated beat
-Bragging about how much money he makes
-Dealing drugs (hence the title)
-Brand name flexing
-Naming his luxury car
-Stealing YOUR girl (who else?)

And look, I’m not hating him for being a basic trap rapper.  It’s just that there is nothing that makes him or this song memorable.  His flow is weak.  There’s no intensity for a song about dealing drugs.  Hell, I commend Fortnite memes for giving this guy a hit because otherwise I would just know him as the guy that Lil Uzi Vert confronted and made him look like even more of a bitch.

Plug Walk.  A forgettable song that was only made a hit because of a stupid dance in an online game.  If this is how we are going to get hits going forward, bring back Vine challenge songs.  Yes I said it.

 

Spoiler

So with radio stations being so out of touch with what people are listening to, they had to fill the airwaves with something.  Right?

 

8. “Lights Down Low” – MAX (featuring gnash)

 

 

Legitimate question.  Who repeatedly wants to listen to this?  Because no joke.  This was a top five pop radio hit and that was the only way this racked up enough points to make this year-end list.  Streaming and sales were practically non-existent from what I’ve read, so clearly there was some audience out there that wanted to listen to this dull snoozefest while stuck in traffic during rush hour.

And I know what you are all thinking about me.  I only put this on the worst list because of what I said about Gnash two years ago and how I never want to hear from this guy ever again.  Well yeah, that is definitely true and this song definitely doesn’t change that.  Especially after hearing him tell this girl that he will treat her better than her other man.  Thank you Shawn Mendes for bringing back that fucking terrible nice guy trope back.  And by that I mean fuck you.

Honestly, and somehow, this Max guy is even worse.  And he does it in one of the most familiar ways imaginable.  This is the most prime example of how punchable these white guys with acoustic guitars so badly want to get in a girl’s pants.  Hell you can tell that just from those opening guitar plucks.  That poor guitar sounds like it is suffering by some asshole playing it like it’s a hunting bow.  PAY ATTENTION TO MY GUITAR STRUMMING GIRLS.  IT"S A REAL GUITAR!  How hacktastic.

But yeah, turn the lights down ladies, so Max can earnestly bone you.  

 

Spoiler

Okay I’ll stop with the bashing of tracking the radio for the Hot 100 because it will seriously derail this countdown even more.  But let me get one more punchline in.  Who the hell is still listening to Maroon 5 without any guest rapper in 2018?

 

7. “Wait” – Maroon 5

 

 

…I guess some people are since Girls Like You was, once again, a number one smash hit…what the actual fuck.  My question still stands though about Maroon 5, themselves.  I have multiple mediums to stream music from Apple Music to Spotify to YouTube and not once did this song appear on any of my playlists nor the top charts.  So this only had to get popular through radio calls.  I will give them credit though.  They sure know how to ride the radio station algorithms right down to the point.  Because I could have mistaken this song for practically anything on the radio this year.  Which I did.  Often.

What’s even the point to get mad at Maroon 5 songs anymore?  I would say they exist, but that would require for Maroon 5 to exist by association and I am a firm believer that the entire band is CGI at this point.  Except for Adam Levine though, who appears on television every Monday and Tuesday to remind us that he is “a human being”.

This song in particular though.  I can at least give credit to all of their other hit singles for having some element to make it distinctly memorable.  What’s memorable here?  Levine’s annoying vocal melody?  The subject matter being as overdone and pointless as ever?  Nothing.  Nothing about this song has any reason to exist.  Hell, it’s not even catchy.  I've kept Maroon 5 off my worst list the past few years for not being ambitiously bad enough, but that's completely different from this which is not even ambitious enough to be anything. 

Not a single element about this song even tries to be ambitious enough to warrant it being around.  Let alone chart for half a year.  Making this the longest lasting chart run Maroon 5 has had for a single song in years.  For this pile of nothing that I’ll probably forget about by the time this post is finished.  Can’t wait to get turnt up to this at the Super Bowl.

 

Spoiler

 

2018 sure was a huge year for Drake.  Probably the main reason why I barely tackled my music thread this year to be honest because it was a shit ton of Drake and I didn’t want to drive myself into a creative writing block.  When it’s all said and done, this will be the decade of Drake and while one could argue that 2016 was probably his biggest year, 2018 will be the year I consider his peak fame year.  I mean Christ, he’s on at least 1/10 of this year end list.  So it’s only fitting to me that one of those songs made this list.

 

6. “I’m Upset” – Drake

 

 

You know for a song called ‘I’m Upset’, this sure sounds as boring and monotonous as a good portion of the music you’ve forced onto the listening public for the last four years Aubrey.  Hey guys, do you know how tough it is to be Drake?  To constantly have problems with the women he’s dated and to be the biggest artist in the game right now?  Man no wonder he’s upset.  I’m not sorry for him.  Not after the year he’s had.  Not after getting rightfully outed for being a deadbeat.  He’s done this song thousands of times and the longer he keeps this sort of shit up, the less I feel any sort of sympathy for his shit.  If you want to know why I hated Scorpion so much, look no further at one of the prime examples of what most of that shit was like.

But after this was released as a response to Pusha and rightfully collapsed the following weeks, I expected it to die off, reappear with the album bomb in the coming month, and not make the year end list at all.  But no.  This song’s staying power was in large part because Drake decided this song needed a music video.  And not just any video; his long awaited return to his Degrassi roots.  Look, I’ll be blunt.  I was never a Degrassi fan, but I know plenty of you are as well as my friends offline are too.  They freaked out just like some of you did.  I liked the Jay and Silent Bob cameos if that means anything.  Song still fucking sucks though.

 

Spoiler

Are you guys ready for more Drake on this list?

 

5. “Yes Indeed” – Lil Baby & Drake

 

 

Well that answers that question.  God Drake has been cosigning absolute shit these past few years.

I know I’ve trashed his cosigns a lot these past few years, but I’ll be honest.  The Drake seal of approval has led to some of the biggest names in music right now.  Migos, The Weeknd, Travis Scott, hell even Kendrick all at one point were all cosigned by Aubrey.  His seal of approval use to mean something at one point.

Now?  It’s an absolute joke.  Honestly, it feels like he just picks these no names just to remind us how worse off we could all be for the amount of times people complain about how sick they are of him.  And you know what?  He’s right.  If it comes to having Drake force more music onto the public and listen to these no names try and replicate him, I’ll take the former in a heartbeat.

I’ll just get straight to the point of this song.  Drake brags about how awesome he is for thirty seconds and Lil Baby mumbles and bumbles monotonously against alright production.  You can seriously apply that comment to practically anything out there right now.  I’m not joking.  I almost considered placing Look Alive on this list for the same reason, but at least I remember Drake’s part and the production on that is much better.

What does a Lil Baby fan even look like?  If I wanted to listen to a rapper that does what he does better, I would listen to Young Thug.  He at least has charisma.  Lil Baby has zero star power.  If the most I can remember from this song is a Pikachu reference and a super lame cringe joke about how awful your stage name is, then you just don’t have it.

 

Spoiler

https://consequenceofsound.net/2018/11/tekashi-6ix9ine-prison-sentence/

What could be worse than 6ix9ine’s unjustified success as a recording artist?  How about a well-established artist clinging onto him for shock value and a last ditch effort to be culturally relevant?

 

4. “FEFE” – 6ix9ine (featuring Nicki Minaj and Murda Beatz)

 

 

You know what I said about GUMMO at least having an interesting production choice?  Here they actually credit the producer for the same looped sound effect over and over and repeat until no end in sight.  It’s not even that good of a sound to begin with.  You sure earned that feature credit Murda Beatz!

But let’s talk about the actual artists involved.  When I began this year, I thought I never wanted to hear 6ix9ine shout, but good lord I would rather have that than listen to him autotune crooning the entire song.  Autotuning how gross and fucking deplorable he is.  Why do people like him again?  Because he’s aggressive on the mic?  Based off his dull limp, hell even child like flow, it’s like he is telling us about a nursery rhyme:

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe
I catch a ho right by her toe
If she ain't fuckin' me and Nicki
Kick that ho right through the door

EWW FUCKING EWW.  MUSIC ARTISTS.  PLEASE STOP REFERENCING EENIE MEENIE MINEY MO!

Obviously the biggest disappointment in all of this is the involvement of Nicki Minaj.  What the fuck is she doing?  There is no denying that 2018 will go down as a really bad year for Nicki and we can point out all of the things that went wrong whether it be: her album not debuting at number one, all the meltdowns, the constant shade directed towards Cardi that lead to the confrontation heard from around the world.  If 2017 was the year where people were questioning what Katy was doing with her career, 2018 should be the year where people continue to question what Nicki is doing.

But you know what my biggest problem is about this?  It makes me miss when music was nostalgically fun to hate.  Let’s take a look at ten years ago.

 

That was then.  And this is now.  If this is self-admitted stupid tasteless music standards today, then (I can’t believe I’m saying this) take me back to the days of will.i.am and Flo Rida over bland uninteresting pedophiles.  How easy is that to make clear?

 

Spoiler

 

Yeah this song is still great.  And early spoiler, but this won’t be making my top ten list this year.  Overplay kind of killed it a bit for me.  But hey, at least I was right about one thing.  This will be the best thing Camila Cabello will ever do.

 

3. “Never Be the Same” – Camila Cabello

 

 

Look I know a lot of you like this song and are huge Camila stans who will hate me for placing this lower than rainbow pedo man above.  Good for you.  Variety in opinions is a good thing.  But this song is fucking abysmal to me.  Nothing pisses me off more than wasted potential.  I know how good Camila can be.  And just like “Havana”, it wouldn’t go the hell away because it was one of the few legitimate smash hits from pop music this year.  Unlike “Havana”, my opinion only got worse and worse the more I heard this.  Where the hell do I even start with this?

First off, and this might only be a thing for me.  I’m so damn tired of the love-drug metaphors in pop music.  I honestly hate it more than fire metaphors.  It’s overdone, beaten to a bloody pulp, and I can think of dozens of songs right off the top of my head that use this abused analogy better.  Hell, I can think of another pop song from this decade that uses it better.

Yeah, probably one of the few early Kesha songs that I’m not afraid to admit that I like.  Why?  Because it actually sounds like she is on drugs while performing this.  Breaking the trope norms that come with it.

Camila sounds like she’s on drugs too…antidepressants.  Which that fits the mood of culture today pretty well.  But this isn’t even interesting levels of love/drug dependency.  She is listing off drugs like they are trading cards.  Even then, it’s not all you need if you’re talking about how much you need this guy more. 

And look I was forgiving of her vocals on "Havana" because it worked with what the song was about.  But I can’t forgive them here.  I’ve said this once and I’ll say it again and again until it’s beaten to death.  If you’re trying to sell how your emotions are a mess, then go all out.  Don’t hold back and Camila actually restrains herself from doing just that to a fault.

At the end of the day, I’ll remember "Havana".  I won’t remember this.  This is dreadfully forgettable.

Please send your complaints to my address below:

Clappy
23 Sesame Street
Nowhereville, VA

 

Spoiler

And speaking of pop songs that wouldn’t go the hell away....yes I'm going there.

 

2. “Perfect” – Ed Sheeran

 

 

This song charted for over a whole fucking year.  I understood letting that happen to “Thinking Out Loud”, hell I understood letting “Shape of You” chart for nearly sixty weeks.  But this?  WHY?  Was the adult contemporary crowd really against letting this one’s chart run die out until Billboard forced it away?  Hell no joke, this song’s chart run was so successful that it gave Ed’s new album potentially TWO SONGS IN THE DECADE TOP TWENTY.

This is the most disposable song in Ed Sheeran’s entire discography.  I’ve said some bad things about his love songs in the past, but at least they had some distinct Ed Sheeran song tropes that only Ed could do.  Any hack could have performed this and it wouldn’t have been notable, but because we live in the Ed Sheeran age of pop music, this is the biggest pop hit of the year.  I'm sorry Camila, this is the biggest example of wasting your potential I've heard in years.  We may have had a lot of popstars not trying in recent years and hence why the genre is not as big anymore, but Ed has the biggest clout right now.  Him ripping himself off as badly as he has with this is just inexcusable mush.  This is him selling out the wedding song market far worse than he did with "Thinking Out Loud".  And as someone who is in the process of planning out his wedding, my fiancé and I want an actual meaningful song to be our song.  This is meaningless.

This isn’t an example of longevity.  This is the example of how badly pure pop music has died off in 2018.  A song that it’s time at the top was mostly last year is the biggest pop song of the year.  Just perfect.

 

Spoiler

I don’t think I’m mincing words when I say this year sucked a big fat one.  And I know what you guys are thinking.  What bland boring pile of shit song from this bland boring pile of shit year topped this list? 

…you know what, this has become a massive cliché.  Hasn’t it?  An overlong preamble about how much I hated my number one choice of this year.  And don’t get me wrong.  I can’t fucking stand a single second of my number one choice.  But this year.  This god forsaken year.  It doesn’t deserve an overlong explanation.  Because so much of this year was on mid to low tempo autopilot, so many of these songs had a legitimate chance to top this list.  It seriously came down to the wire and who knows.  Maybe looking back I’ll think that any one of these songs could have topped this list.

But the song I selected.  I couldn’t think of a better example as to how utterly awful and forgettable it was to be a “hit single” in 2018.

 

1. “Changes” – XXXTentacion

 

 

Look, I get that this might an odd choice for my worst hit song of the year and I do think it’s a tragedy that XXXTentacion was taken away from us so soon.  After not understanding this guy’s appeal as a performer last year, I kind of understand it a bit more this year.  I checked out that new album of his and there is admittedly some good songs that came from “?”, hell “Moonlight” is one of the thirty best hits of this year.  What I’m saying is that I’m not placing this song at number one because I hate who he was as a person.  I think this song is a steaming pile of dogshit regardless of who performed it.

Even if you had no idea who XXXTentacion was, everything about this song is artistically abysmal.  The music is painfully basic.  I could play this piano line when I was nine years old.  The singing is so insufferably whiny that I could have sung this better.  And good lord, these lyrics are so amateur, I could have written them.  I shouldn’t be having to point out that I can perform, sing, and write a song better than one of the biggest artists of 2018.  This is a YouTube cover song of itself.

There is nothing worth mentioning about the actual song.  Poor X, doesn’t like the fact that his girl is changing.  That he has to repeat this point.  TEN TIMES.  And she’s making it hard for X that he has to repeat this point.  SIX TIMES. 

Never before have I been this pissed off by simplicity.  I often mention how the bare minimums in piano ballads better be damn impressive, but this is beyond insulting.  The fact that it cracked the Top 40 even before X’s passing goes to show that as a listening public, we are complacent.  When I listen to music, I shouldn’t have to listen to something that could have been ripped straight from a Preschoolers’ Guide to Making Pop Music.  Get this amateur hour, show and tell crap off my year end charts.  This music charting system is broken.  2019, do better!

 

Thanks for reading guys.  Best list is in the works.

  • Like 6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

as always, a good list claps. you explained pretty well on why these songs just didn't work and lemme just say about this one song I've never listened but after seeing this.

Spoiler

 Eeny, meeny, miny, moe
I catch a ho right by her toe
If she ain't fuckin' me and Nicki
Kick that ho right through the door

*reported for abuse*

 

  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...