SBC: Wasteland Warriors

[Jjs Goodman]

17. Always Two There Are

Continuing from the previous chapter, the laser blast heads for the surrounded heroes. The heroes manage to all jump out of the way, barely in time. The laser blast hits the SBC Explorer, exploding it, as the pieces fly everywhere. A tire hits Hayden in the head, annoying him.

"Jerk! >_>" Hayden yelled to Infinex.

"oh god no, hilaryfan80 won't be happy about this..." Cha said, seeing the destroyed van parts everywhere.

"Press F to pay respects." WhoBob said, saluting the now dead van.

"Forget hilaryfan80, now we have no way back through the desert, because fuck it if I'm walking through that desert." Trophy said, as the robots keep surrounding them.

"Attack, minions!" Infinex ordered to his grunts.

The robots leap at the heroes. WhoBob smashes right through a robot with his Thor hammer, sending its remains flying into the sandy ("Ohh, I get it, she's Sandy...that's her name and she's also covered in...yes!") ground. Cha slices two robots to pieces with her anime sword. SOF avoids a robot's arm, and punches it with his boxing gloves. Trophy blows some robots to fuckin pieces with his rocket launcher. Hayden sends blasts from his sonic screwdriver, disabling two robots. The five are able to wreck Infinex's grunts, leaving only Infinex himself, Hank and Hugh left. Hugh throws several donuts at Cha, who slices them apart with her anime sword. Hank holds out a propane gun, firing blasts. Hayden unleashes his sonic screwdriver, disabling the propane gun. Infinex applauds them, confusing the heroes.

"You did well. However, let's see if you can handle me face to face, for I am the king of ruin and chaos. You will not best my strength-" Infinex was rambling, giving a Lich-esque speech.

"Blah blah blah, you're so evil it's boring, dude!" Hayden snapped.

Hayden sends a sonic screwdriver blast at Infinex, but he takes it like a man (or machine, your choice), doing no harm to him. Hayden is shocked by this. 

"FOR ASGARD!" WhoBob yelled, running forward with Thor's hammer in his hands.

WhoBob swings Thor's hammer at Infinx. But Infinex quickly grabs onto the hammer with his Terminator hands, stopping the swing with his strength. He rips the hammer out of WhoBob's hands and throws it aside, surprising WhoBob and the heroes.

"oof-" WhoBob was saying, as Infinex punches him, knocking WhoBob to the ground.

The four run up further, coming to WhoBob's aid, as Cha and SOF help him up.

"it okay bud, we gotchu," SOF said, making sure WhoBob is okay (bless SOF's heart).

"Take this, motherfucker!" Trophy yelled, firing his rocket launcher.

Infinex takes the rocket blast, as the explosion covers the area. Infinex walks out of the smoke like a badass, completely unscratched, surprising the heroes. Cha runs up and slices her anime sword at Infinex, but it doesn't even scratch his Terminator body. Infinex then punches Cha aside, making her fall to the ground. This pisses SOF off, making him unleash his BROOKLYN RAGE! 

"alwight, that's it you peace of shut machun, nobody hits Cha!!!" SOF yelled, as he runs up.

SOF begins boxing against Infinex, who blocks his boxing gloves. He then sends a laser blast, knocking SOF to the ground as well. 

"cruses..." SOF said, disappointed, as they help him up too.

"It's okay SOF, u tried, thx for trying to avenge me," Cha said, proud of him.

Infinex then sends powerful plasma blasts from his eyes at the five, knocking all five down to the sand. The heroes are defeated (for now, at least). 

"You go, chief!" Hugh cheered.

"I tell you hwhat, I reckon these fellows are done for." Hank said, impressed with his master's skill.

Infinex powers up another plasma blast, as the heroes struggle to move off the sand.

"Shit...we're paralyzed." Hayden realized, as he is barely able to move his body.

Before Infinex can fire however, two powerful laser blasts come from above, shooting around the sand. (fuckin duh', of course I wouldn't kill the cast 17 chapters in) Everyone is confused by this, as they look up confused. The heroes are able to safely get up. From the sky, a rusty old silver jet plane flies downward, which is shooting the lasers. Infinex, Hank and Hugh take cover, trying to avoid them.

"...Hooray for ass pull?" Hayden asked, confused.

"What is this unpredicted interference?" Infinex asked, irritated, sending lasers back at the plane.

"Trust me dude, we're as confused as you are." Trophy replied.

Infinex fires two plasma blasts at the plane, but it swerves, avoiding them. The plane then lands near the heroes, as a hatch is opened.

"uhh, should we really go with strangers? o_o" WhoBob asked.

"Better than staying with them!" Cha said, as Infinex, Hugh and Hank approach them.

The five hop into the plane, as it flies off through the desert skies. Infinex looks up at this annoyed.

"Oh no, how will we find them now!?" Hugh asked, panicking.

"Do not worry. They are in my territory now. They cannot hide from me for long in the wastelands..." Infinex said ominously.

Inside the plane, the heroes look around. They see several wrestling posters and merchandise around, along with some anime and Doki Doki Literature merchandise.

"wat the...?" SOF asked.

Suddenly, OMJ and Aya walk out of the pilot room, who greet the heroes, surprising them.

"Sup bruthas. Had no clue the other SBCers were still out there, so seeing y'all warms me old heart." OMJ greeted, wearing cool sunglasses.

"hola amigos," Aya greeted.

"OMG OMJ AND AYA " Cha yelled, surprised to see the two.

"HOLY SHIT, OMG I'M HAPPY YOU TWO RESCUED US! Thank the Gods Aya and OMJ. " WhoBob said happy.

"YOU TWO ALIVE!? FUCK YES!" SOF yelled, happy.

"Now wait a minute guys, these two could be part robot too or something, maybe this is a trick by Infinex. " Hayden said, suspicious, as is Trophy.

"Yeahhh this seems a bit too convenient, I'm not sold yet." Trophy replied.

"Nah fam, if we were working for Infinex we would've left you for dead back there, since it looked y'all were losing. Also, we hate those filthy machines too." Aya said, as they see  a room filled with tons of robot debris.

"Hey, we weren't losing, we were a disadvantage since mr. big bad villain used hacks. =/" Hayden said.

"Also, if I was really a robot, I'd be a hell of a lot less cheery than I am rn nor would I be wearing these old ass clothes. " OMJ said, referring to the fact his clothes look old as shit (old man!). 

"...They have some damn good points, yup that's them. Thank you good sirs for your kind patronage." Trophy replied, shaking OMJ and Aya's hands.

"Eh...I'm still a bit-" Hayden was saying.

"World Tour is best TD season, also Chilly Billy did nothing wrong." Aya said to Hayden.

"Okay yeah, it's them. You still have good taste even after the end.  " Hayden replied, shaking Aya's hand first, and then OMJ's.

"Where were you guys though? All the SBCers evacuated to da dome." Whobob inquired.

"After Mad Max: Terminator happened and robots took over the world (OUR WORLD!), Aya and I went into hiding lol. We've been living out in the harsh deserts, surviving in this cool jet we found and modified. The two of us have basically just been kicking robot ass in the wasteland, and surviving together with our wits and skill." OMJ explained, as a flashback shows the two wandering through the wastelands together.

"We had no clue about this dome place, happy to hear some of you guys survived." Aya added.

"We'll show you the way, and no Ugandan Knuckles reference please or I swear to god, I will murder someone in cold blood, say I did it, and no jury will convict me." Trophy said.

Everyone isn't sure how to respond to Trophy's cold rant, giving awkward af looks.

"Well I at least know Trophy's not a robot, since that sure sounds like something I'd read in the old days." OMJ joked.

"How did you guys find us?" Cha asked.

"We heard the explosion from that van, which certainly caught our attention." Aya explained.

"Oh yeah...hilaryfan80 won't be happy about that when we return. " WhoBob said awkwardly.

"Ironically, in the end destroying that ugly van saved our lives." Hayden pondered (whoa, that's deep af). 

"Good news and bad news, amigos: Bad news, we won't be reaching the dome for a while, it's a lot farther away than I expected. Good news tho: We got plenty of snacks for you. " Aya explained, showing them the kitchen with tons of junk.

"thx omj and aya, you guys BEST rescue team ever," SOF complimented, giving them the SOF Seal of Approval.

"When we do return...maybe you two could be new team members? They have da skill with destroying robots, and the more Avengers team members, the better?" WhoBob suggested.

"yo man let's fucking do it, I'd love for them to be on the team " Cha said, liking WhoBob's idea. 

"plz," SOF said.

"Team? Are y'all the Power Rangers or something? Because I'd be down for PR shenanigans." OMJ said.

"We're the Protectors of SBC, our sole duty is to stop creepy robots and protect the dome from threats, along with occasionally fighting a crazy Christian biker gang." Trophy explained.

"i'm sure hilaryfan80 would be fine with you two joining," Cha said.

"I'll support this since their jet skills can be useful, they have the experience fighting machines, and they can be consolation for losing hilaryfan80's van. Also, you'll also get clothes that won't look like shit, and some badass weapons. I got this bad boy.  " Hayden said, showing them his sonic screwdriver. 

"and plus you'll be badass guardians of all of SBC alongside us," WhoBob said.

"Sounds cherry." OMJ said, accepting their offer.

"count me in too boys, we're the Fantastic Seven now," Aya said, also accepting the offer.

"YES, YES, YES!" SOF yelled in a Daniel Bryan voice.

"now the Protectors just got a lot sexier, amigos," Aya said.

"Boy, do we have some stories for you two." Trophy was saying.

Meanwhile, down in the deserts...

Infinex walks around with Hugh, Hank, and another robot, hunting them down. The robot is a giant robot scorpion, looking like one creepy ass motherfuckin' predator.

"Creepy..." Hugh said, backing away. 

"Yikes, that son of a bitch gives me the goosebumps..." Hank said, weirded out by its glowing purple eyes.

"The Scorpobot Generation 10 is one of my most deadly machines. They will not escape it. It will sniff them out. Go, my pet." Infinex ordered.

The Scorpobot crawls off through the desert plains, hot on their trail.

Meanwhile meanwhile, DS Guy and his Christian biker gang are seen riding by. They then see the plane flying overhead.

"...A plane? Could it be a blessing from The Lord!?  " DS Guy pondered.

"Maybe he brought food for us, or it's a plane full of more holy Christian men like us!" one of the bikers said hopefully.

"it better not a muslim plane that the terrorist will use to bomb us," todd phillips said.

"If it is, then we'll be stopping the evil of Islam from spreading. We must find out what is on that plane. ROLL OUT, CHRISTIAN RAVAGERS!" DS Guy commanded, as the bikers race off after the plane.

As OMJ and Aya's plane keeps flying, suddenly...

The Scorpobot is seen on a cliff. It sees the plane in its sights, coming closer, as the Scorpobot locks onto it with its eyes. The Scorpobot fires a missile from the back of its tial at the plane. The plane wing is damaged, shocking the heroes. The plane begins to go out of control, and falls closer to the desert ground.

"We're going down lads, brace yourselves!" Aya warned to everyone inside, as they brace for impact, ending us on another cliffhanger.

Edited June 27, 2018 by jjsthekid

[Jjs Goodman]

(NOTICE: The events of this chapter were planned out before recent events occurred. Unfortunately, I cannot rewrite them to fit recent events to fit with my S1 vision. Please treat any user portrayals as complete fiction and only complete fiction.)

18. In or Out

The plane crashes, as it slides across the desert sand upon impact. It comes to a stop, as the seven heroes are shown to still be okay on the inside. They try to walk around in the wrecked interior from the impact.

"yay, we didnut die!" SOF said happily.

"But um, what struck us down??? " WhoBob asked, confused. 

"Something tells me we'll find out soon enough." Hayden said, weary.

The seven get out of the crashed plane, and walk around the sand.

"Good news: we're alive. Bad news: I have no fucking clue where we are and now we have to walk back..." Trophy said annoyed, looking through the barren ass desert.

"Don't worry my fellow pioneers, all we need to do is find some moss! Which we probably won't at this rate." OMJ said, as he keeps seeing nothing but sand.

"All we need to do is look for a big ass dome, I think we'll be fin

"let's hope those christian assholes aren't around here tho," Cha said, as the heroes carefully walk along.

As soon as that was said however, the Christian Ravagers' bikes are heard from the distance.

"We've found the plane, gentlemen!" DS Guy said, looking at it with his telescope, as he keeps riding.

"Aren't those the SBCers, sir?" another biker asked by his side, as DS Guy looks closer.

"...Indeed. " DS Guy replied, giving a creepy ass smile.

"Dammit Cha stop jinxing us!" Trophy said annoyed, as the seven look into the distance for the bikers.

The Christian Ravagers come circling around, as the seven get back closer toward the plane wreckage.

"Who are these fuckwads?" Aya asked.

"A group of psycho Christians led by DS Guy, yup he's still relevant even in the apocalypse." Trophy explained.

"I've been waiting to kick that jackass's ass again for a long time, so I'm ready boys." Aya replied determined.

"Let those nutty mothafuckas come to us, cause we got quite the surprise in our plane. " OMJ said, as the seven head back inside of the plane remains.

The Christian Ravagers stop circlejerking around, and come to a stop. DS Guy gets off his bike, holding his wicked cross staff, and approaches the wrecked plane. The rest of the bikers get off as well, approaching with their weapons.

"So the pretentious liberal agenda SBC users are hiding in this plane? Are they trying to protect the radical Islamic terrorists inside?" DS Guy pondered.

"i bet that terrorist obama is in there too that is where he has been hiding all this time," todd phillips said.

"We won't allow them to harbor any terrorists, for the good ol US of A. GOD BLESS AMERICA!" DS Guy yelled.

The gang approaches closer to the crashed plane. Suddenly, the seven SBCers run out of it, holding paintball guns. They begin firing their paintball guns at once, splattering the paint all over the biker gang. 

"OH NO, HELP US LORD!" a biker yelled, as paint covers their entire helmet visor.

WhoBob then swings his hammer, knocking the blinded biker down into the sand. OMJ does some Jackie Chan like moves on another biker, sending him smashing against the plane, knocking him out. Aya and Trophy fight off todd philips and another biker together.

"It feels nice to work side by side with my fellow SBM moddie! " Trophy said, swinging his baseball bat at a biker, clashing it with their staff.

"Same here, partner." Aya replied, as he splatters more paint over todd.

"no curse you evil muslim loving liberals this is not the last of todd phillips!" todd phillips yelled, as he falls to the sandy ground with paint all over him.

Hayden swings his nunchucks at DS Guy, who gets hit by them in the helmet.

"Oww, that hurt, meanie!" DS Guy yelled, as he swings his staff back at Hayden.

The two continue dueling like two Star Wars nerds (Hayden represents the Jedi and DS Guy represents the Sith), with this playing in the background.

Cha slices another biker's staff with her anime sword, and SOF splats them with his paintball gun. DS Guy is the only one left standing, as the seven approach him.

"You will not defeat me this time! The Lord's blessing is on my side this time, you atheist SBC heavens!" DS Guy said, swinging his staff like a "badass".

"Well if those are his best "threats" then I'd say we should just pack up and leave now." OMJ said.

"Nah, I must humiliate DS Guy again. We are sworn religious rivals til the bitter end!" Hayden said, ready to blast him with his sonic screwdriver.

"Hey DS lad, I have some unfortunate news for you: The robots are turning the frogs gay. " Aya announced to DS Guy, triggering him. 

"...wat?" SOF asked.

"NO! THE FROGS LIKE PEPE MUST NOT BE TRANSFORMED INTO GAYS TOO! HOW DARE THOSE EVIL ROBOTS?! IN THE NAME OF THE LORD, THE FROGS WILL BE AVENGED!" DS Guy yelled, getting distracted, actin like this:

As DS Guy is distracted by his Alex Jones conspiracy ramblings, everyone fires their paintball guns at the clown. Hayden then knocks him down into the sand with a blast from his sonic screwdriver. The bikers are all knocked out and defeated.

"thx OMJ for pantball goons," SOF said, firing another one shot at todd phillips.

"Glad to see SOF still hasn't lost his touch." OMJ replied, proud of him.

"Alright for real now tho, let's get out of here before they wake up." Trophy said, as the seven run off, leaving the sad Christian bois near the wrecked plane.

Before they leave, Aya shoots paint all over DS Guy's bike, forming a picture of Alejandro, making him smile. He then heads off with the rest.

...

The Scorpobot crawls along through the desert, as it approaches the plane wreckage. It sees the knocked out bikers, and scans around. One of the bikers gets up, looking at the Scorpobot over him.

"GAAHH, WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS THAT!?" the biker panicked, as he gets up and runs off.

The Scorpobot pinches one of its metal claws, as it scans footprints from the seven heroes. It sees them going off into the desert, as it gives chase.

The seven heroes still walk through the scorching desert, not having any luck seeing SBC. Cha and Aya look at their maps, trying to find where it is.

"Ugh...my feet are killing me..." WhoBob said, sad.

"the krusty krab pizza, is the pizza..." Cha sang.

"i hope we dont die out here... " SOF said worried.

"Come on guys, let's not give up. We've survived everything Infinex and DS Guy have thrown at us so far, the stupid sand isn't going to stop us now!" Hayden said, trying to cheer them up.

"Hayden has a point brothas, we've survived this far into the apocalypse, don't give up now. We'll make it back to SBC, together." OMJ encouraged, giving an inspiration speech.

"What OMJ said, we'll find a way back, even if it takes a while, we're not letting those robot scum win." Aya added.

"wow omj and aya, tat was touching," SOF said, sniffing.

"Wow, I guess you two really are in the team to make speeches like this. Let's do it." Hayden said, as he tries leading the team forward.

"Uhh, those were nice words of encouragement, but I don't think he agrees..." Trophy said.

The seven turn around, to see the Scorpobot jump at them. The seven get out of the way, avoiding the Scorpobot's claws.

"The fuck is that???" WhoBob asked, grabbing his hammer and shield.

"God fucking dammit, apparently the robots forgot to exterminate these filthy scorpions. >_> " Trophy said, irritated, as he gets his weapons ready.

"That ain't any ordinary scorpion, fellas." OMJ said, as they notice how it is a robot.

"Looks like Infinex sent this son of a bitch to hunt us down." Hayden said, sending a sonic blast at it, but the Scorpobot avoids it.

The Scorpobot shoots its tail at them, as they barely avoid it. WhoBob swings his hammer at one of its claws, but it whacks it out of his hand with its metal claw. WhoBob then holds out his shield, blocking another strike from its metal claw. Cha then slices her anime sword at the Scorpobot, but it does nothing to its metal body. She then fires her guano gun, hitting its right eye, making it flinch. It then regains its stance and tries to attack Cha again with its tail. It manages to grab her.

"oh god, help!" Cha yelled, struggling to break free.

Trophy fires his rocket launcher, blowing off its tail, and releasing Cha. However, the Scorpobot regrows its tail, as the metal pieces reform themselves.

"This is one hell of an op bot." OMJ said, firing his paintball gun at it, as the Scorpobot keeps quickly moving around, avoiding it. "And also a fast motherfucker."

Hayden sends a sound strike from his screwdriver, trying to disable the Scorpobot, but it jumps up into the air. It fires a missile from its tail. Everyone runs, avoiding an explosion from the missile. The Scorpobot then lands onto the ground, hissing. It keeps menacingly chasing after them. SOF then tries to attack with his Star Butterfly wand, but the Scorpobot avoids him again, and knocks him to the ground with his tail. Before the Scorpobot can attack him, Hayden and Trophy both attack it with a sonic blast and rocket blast respectively, hurting it. Aya then notices the Scorpobot using its eyes to scan around for them. 

"I figured it out, boys. Attack that fucker's eyes." Aya said.

Aya fires his paintball gun at the Scorpobot's right eye, blinding it. OMJ then fires multiple paintballs at its left eye, also blinding it. The Scorpobot struggles to move around, flailing its tail and claws. The heroes all shoot paintballs, coating its body. 

"Time for a tag team destruction?" OMJ asked to Aya.

"You bet." Aya replied.

OMJ and Aya both jump onto the Scorpobot's back. The two hold out bombs, as they plant them on the back. The two hop off, as they explode on the Scorpobot's back.

"Would you two like the honors?" Trophy asked, handing Aya his rocket launcher.

"With pleasure." Aya replied.

"you can have this too," Cha said, handing OMJ her Guano gun.

"Cha's Kappa Mikey obsession...boy, was that a time.  Anyways, let's trash this tired bot as if it were just 'nother spambot on SBC." OMJ said.

Aya and OMJ then both deliver the final strike to the Scorpobot, using Trophy's rocket launcher and Cha's guano gun, making it explode. (F) The two do a cool badass pose in front of the explosion like Power Rangers.

"  " Cha posted, proud of Aya and OMJ.

"Nice work you two, omg you saved us from evil and ugly scorpion!" WhoBob said, happy.

"thx god for Aya and OMJ, the best WWE team EVER!" SOF yelled, cheering.

"I have to say, you two have proven to be exceptional newbies to our team. hilaryfan80 will be happy to have you aboard.  " Hayden said.

"Wait a minute...is that the dome we've been looking for?" OMJ asked, seeing it in the distance ahead.

"YES!" Cha yelled.

The seven head for it. Meanwhile, Infinex, Hank and Hugh approach the destroyed corpse of the Scorpobot.

"Yup, he's dead boss." Hank said, checking him.

'How unfortunate. But do not worry. I know what they escaped with. A map to someone I've been seeking." Infinex said, pleased ad laughing.

The seven SBCers make their way closer to the dome, happy to see it ahead.

"FREEDOM, FREEDOM!" Trophy yelled, as they reach the outside.

"So...what's our next step, amigos?" Aya asked.

"We're going to finally find where jjs is." Hayden said determined, looking at the map from SBM.

Edited July 5, 2018 by jjsthekid

[Jjs Goodman]

Season finale time...

(NOTICE: The events of this chapter were planned out before recent events occurred. Unfortunately, I cannot rewrite them to fit recent events to fit with my S1 vision. Please treat any user portrayals as complete fiction and only complete fiction.)

19. The Map: Part One

The heroes are inside the base. The picture of jjs' map is seen on a bulletin board, as they analyze it. They see the red lines leading to a secret part of the desert, miles away from the SBC dome.

"so...wat do it mean?" SOF asked, scratching his head.

"That my dear SOF, is what we're gonna find out. Wherever these lines lead, jjs might be waiting there...hopefully." Hayden said, hopeful.

"Well wherever the dude has been, he's better at hiding than bin Laden!" Trophy said, impressed.

"M.D.P.P, do you know anything about this location?" WhoBob asked to him, as M.D.P.P observes.

"Not a clue. Wherever this location is, it's completely unknown territory to me as well." M.D.P.P replied, intrigued.

"well whatever awaits us there, let's go guys, we GOTTA get jjs back!" Cha said, determined.

"One problem: How will we get there tho? We destroyed M.D.P.P's van...oops. " WhoBob pointed out, as the seven heroes look at M.D.P.P awkwardly.

"...I'm still not very happy about that. >_> However, all is forgiven.  We all make mistakes, myself included." M.D.P.P replied.

"Yeah, like unleashing a virus onto the world and creating the apocalypse. " Hayden replied.

"I thought we dropped that. I never said I was perfect, okay!? We'll make it through this together, I promise. I too would love to see jjs again." M.DP.P. replied.

"I too hope my brotha jjs is doing fine, wherever his ass has been. Hopefully we don't find a rotting corpse, as that'd be depressing af." OMJ said.

"don't make me think about that omj omg," WhoBob replied, worried.

"I'm sure jjs is fine," Cha said confidently.

"I know he's alive, but why he's been hiding elsewhere is the real mystery." Hayden wondered.

"Hopefully he's not pulling a Luke Skywalker or else we'll be getting tons of complaints from whiny fanboys that "THIS ISN'T THE JJS I GREW UP WITH!" and how we're pushing an SJW agenda!" Trophy said.

"but sbc already has liberal agenda  " WhoBob said.

"    " Aya posted. 

"Ahh, how I've missed witty banter like this, good times.   " OMJ said.

"Having OMJ and Aya join the team was one of our best decisions tbh, glad you two are back." Cha said.

"Oh, right! Since I forgot to give them a nice M.D.P.P introduction: I'm happy to have our two new members on the team. The more the merrier!  In fact, OMJ and Aya, I've created these special weapons just for you..." M.D.P.P said to OMJ and Aya.

OMJ receives a mallet, and Aya receives a Doki Doki Literature gun. 

"Niiice." Aya said, comparing it to Cha's Guano gun.

"Thanks, doc. Looks just like ol' Impostor SOF's, good times indeed. Man, what a nostalgia rush this old coot is havin'." OMJ said, holding onto it.

"there is only one sof " SOF said sternly.

"oh shit daddy SOF, don't get the belt please " Cha said worried.

"...wat?" SOF replied.

"You'll understand when you're a father, SOF." Trophy replied.

"ewww, Trophy, that's gross," SOF replied.

"I'm glad SOF has stayed the same in the apocalypse, the world would be nothing without him.  " Aya said.

"Alright, this banter was fun, but now we gotta go. Bring everything you need team, because who knows how long this trip will take." Hayden said.

The heroes pack up on weapons, food and supplies. Hayden holds onto the picture Cha took of the map, analyzing it carefully.

"But now, how are we going to ride through the desert?" WhoBob asked.

"Good question, and I assume M.D.P.P. doesn't have anymore vehicles to spare to us, rip." Trophy replied.

"You're damn right. Unfortunately, I cannot make another vehicle...that's why you should be more careful using my stuff.   " M.D.P.P said.

"Good condescending tone. Also, we're absolutely not using the Dramatic Static, let me make that clear right now." Hayden replied.

The seven heroes head outside of the base, figuring out what to use for their mode of transportation. Suddenly, they see JCM riding by in a decently sized pickup truck. The seven wave to him, as he comes to a stop.

"JCM, can we please use your truck to go on a rescue mission through the wastelands to save jjs?" Hayden asked him.

JCM thinks about it.

"sure," JCM replied, giving them the keys.

"Thank you based JCM, I promise I'll never make fun of you for being slow again!" Trophy replied.

Hayden takes the driver's seat, and Trophy has shotgun.

"no fair trop, i wanted that seat..." SOF said sadly.

"Maybe on the ride back." Trophy replied.

"Welp doc, we found a mode of transportation from an unexpected source." OMJ reported to M.D.P.P.

"Alright, good luck. I'll still be here if you need any help." M.D.P.P replied.

The truck rides off. Patty and crush open the gate, as the truck drives out of the dome, into the wastelands once more.

"Don't worry my confidant, we're coming..." Hayden said, looking at the map.

Cream is seen in the SBC command tower, as many guards and officers are hard at work with her.

"Governor, the Protectors have left to find jjs. We'll finally get him back." M.D.P.P. spoke to Cream through the communicator.

"...I see." Cream replied strangely.

Cream and Metal look at each other, as they walk down a hall suspiciously (ominous...). The rest of the officers keep to their business, although OWM is a bit suspicious by this, as most of you probably are.

The truck keeps heading off through the desert. The truck drives quite a distance, and see a large canyon up ahead.

"We're only halfway there, halfway there!" Cha said.

Suddenly, they hear motorbike noises from behind.

"Let me guess..." Aya was saying.

The Christian Ravagers approach them from behind. The bikers fire actual guns (!) at the truck.

"Well I'm glad that even in the apocalypse, gun control still doesn't exist. >_>" Hayden said, trying to drive, as the bullets strike the back of the truck.

"It appears we have no choice but to rid these pitiful SBCers with the power of The 2nd Amendment. Robots will not take my right to bear arms away either." DS Guy said, firing his shotgun. "YEEHAW!"

Suddenly, three cybernetic planes fly above. Several robots on motorbikes go falling out of them, landing on the ground ahead of the truck. Infinex, Hugh and Hank jump out of a plane as well, landing on the ground. Hugh and Hank both land on their legs, feeling odd.

"Wow...that hurt my legs A LOT more than I was expecting!" Hugh said happily, struggling to walk now.

"I've survived worse, partner." Hank said, standing like a champ.

"WTF how did Infinex find us that quickly!?" WhoBob asked, as the heroes are confused.

The heroes are completely surrounded by Infinex's forces and the Christian Ravagers...

To Be Continued!?

20. The Map: Part Two

God dangit, you already know what happened above, no recap needed. Now, let's proceed.

Infinex's forces and the Christian Ravagers still have the Protectors surrounded. Infinex glares at the truck with his Terminator eyes. He fires two death lasers, as the truck barely avoids it. The two death lasers hit two of the Christian bikers, vaporizing their bikes and killing the two (F).

"Seriously, WhoBob is right, how did they find us so quickly? I'm kinda suspicious... o_O" Trophy said.

"Whatever the reason, let's kick some robot and crazy Christian asses." OMJ said, grabbing his mallet.

Hayden swerves the truck, making it run right over two robot bikers. 

"Also, robots on motorbikes? Jfc, and people thought 5D's was ridiculous!" Trophy said, as he fires his rocket launcher at another robot biker from the truck window, destroying it.

The Christian Ravagers keep shooting their guns at both the robots and the truck, not having much success.

"For a bunch of proud gun toters, they sure are sucking at shooting." Aya said, as their bullets keep missing.

Aya fires his Doki Doki gun at a Christian biker nearby, knocking them off, as he goes tumbling around in the sand. Cha fires her Guano gun at a robot's bike, causing it to explode. SOF shoots a laser blast from Star's wand at todd phillips, knocking him off his bike.

"oww, that was not nice," todd phillips said, as he gets back on.

Some remaining Christians get into fights with the robot bikers, and get knocked off like losers (wah wah wah). DS Guy realizes his team is sucking balls right now (not literally), so he and his nerds move their bikes closer to Infinex, who is about to attack the SBCers again.

"Lmao, is DS Guy really that stupid to approach Infinex? Oh wait..." WhoBob realized.

"Hey, uh mr. evil robot overlord...I've accepted we kind of suck right now, so how about we team up? With Christians by your side, you'd be unstoppable!" DS Guy bargained.

Infinex responds by shooting another death laser at one of DS Guy's minions, vaporizing them.

"wow look at these evil liberal robots inciting violence just like Black Lives Matter, they must be killed," todd phillips said.

"Yeah, this isn't going to work out. Oh well. Adios, amigo!" DS Guy said.

The remains of the Christian Ravagers panic like a bunch of bitches, fleeing away on their motorbikes.

"Welp, that handles them! And we didn't even have to do anything!" OMJ said.

"Dangit, I wanted another Hayden vs DS Guy rival battle. Oh well, maybe next season." Hayden said, as he keeps calmly driving the truck, and smashes through two more robots with it.

Before they can escape, Infinex fires a laser from his eyes at the mountain nearby. His blast makes some boulders (it's not just a boulder, it's a rock!) come falling down. The bikers try to avoid the falling boulders, but DS Guy can't keep up.

"Phooey, I'm not this good at biking. Oh no..." DS Guy panicked.

He then gets crushed by a boulder, leaving his fate ambiguous. The rest of the bikers escape, zooming off into the deserts. (Is this really the end of DS Guy? Find out in Season 2!  )

Meanwhile, OWM walks down a hallway of the command tower. He sees Cream and Metal sneakily exit a room, as OWM stays hidden. The two walk further down the hallway. He looks around carefully, and the coast the clear. He opens the door into the room, and heads into a private communication signal room. It shows records of every transmission from SBC. OWM looks at the logs of recently sent transmissions. He then gasps in horror when he looks through the logs.

"No...it can't be..." OWM said.

OWM has discovered something that would force him to swallow a red pill so massive that it would change his perception on two users...forever.

Back near the canyon, all of Infinex's grunts have been trashed. Hugh throws some doughnuts in the air, as they float like frisbees.

"heh, is that best you got?" SOF asked.

Suddenly, the doughnuts beep like bombs. They all detonate, exploding in the air. The truck barely avoids the explosions. Before Hugh can throw another, Aya quickly fires his Doki Doki gun at the doughnut. It sends the doughnut flying back at Hugh, exploding at him, sending him flying to the ground knocked out.

"OH GOD NO, NOT HUGH! You sons of bitches will pay for that-" Hank was saying.

OMJ then jumps out of the truck and whacks Hank in the head hard with his mallet.

"You want a HAMMER, is that what you want, a damn HAMMER?!" OMJ yelled, as he knocks Hank out too.

"Propane..." Hank said deliriously, as he shuts off.

"great job OMJ and Aaya," SOF said, giving them a thumbs up.

Infinex then approaches them, irritated.

"I will not let you pass. I will reach jjs first and terminate him, permanently." Infinex said.

"Let's finally finish with this fuckwad." Trophy said, readying his rocket launcher.

The seven attack him at once, as Infinex counters their attacks like a ninja. SOF uses his boxing gloves to punch Infinex, but Infinex knocks him down. OMJ swings his hammer right at Infinex, who shrugs it off, and knocks him aside. He fires multiple lasers back at the rest of the heroes. WhoBob throws up his shield, deflecting one of the lasers back at Infinex, hitting him in the chest. Cha and Aya both fire their guns, as Infinex casts up two plasma shields, blocking them. Trophy fires his rocket launcher, but his shield blocks it too. Hayden sends out a blast from his sonic screwdriver, which slightly damages Infinex, but he keeps walking. He fires some death lasers, and the heroes all scatter, barely avoiding them. 

"Hmm...WhoBob's shield worked well. Maybe deflect his attacks again, and when he's vulnerable, we can all strike him at once?" Hayden suggested.

"sure, since nothing else is working rn lmao," Cha replied.

Infinex fires another laser blast, and WhoBob gets in the way. He uses is shield to deflect it at Infinex again, hitting him in the eyes.

"NO!" Infinex yelled, losing his vision.

"NOW!" Trophy yelled.

The seven attack Infinex at once, causing an explosion. Infinex barely walks forward from the smoke, revealing half of his body and face are torn off. 

"THIS WILL NOT BE MY END! I AM THE GOD OF THIS WORLD! YOU FOOLS CANNOT BEST ME!" Infinex yelled, giving out his final badass villain speech.

"You ain't no god, even if one existed. You aren't preventing me from getting to my friend." Hayden said.

Hayden runs up and punches Infinex multiple times. He then sends out another sonic blast, damaging the rest of Infinex's body. Hayden swings his fist one last time, and smashes right into Infinex's head, smashing it apart (!!!). The rest of Infinex's body falls to the ground. Infinex's virus form escapes the destroyed body, and escapes into the air, heading back to his evil lair.

"...damn, hay is king," SOF said.

"I'm sure he'll be back again tomorrow, but yeah, let's celebrate our victory by meeting jjs...hopefully!" Trophy said.

"Damn Hayden mah boi, those were some fuckin' Bruce Lee fighting moves you had there." OMJ said, impressed.

"Guess putting some of his blood in me paid off.  " Hayden said, as the heroes head back inside of the truck.

...

The truck makes its way through the rest of the canyon, as they carefully follow the map. They make it to a clearing, where they find a camp site and...an abandoned Strickland Propane building (???). A mysterious man exits the building, as the heroes get out of the truck. The man looks up at the seven, showing his face. It is jjs (for legit realz)   

"...How the fuck did you guys find me?" jjs asked, looking at them surprised, and the heroes look at him surprised back.

"...It's really jjs." Hayden said, in disbelief.

"...I have a lot of questions." Trophy replied. (that you'll be waiting until Season 2 for)

"...can i faint now?" SOF asked, fainting for drama and the cliffhanger.

Back at the SBC tower, OWM storms into the main room annoyed.

"ATTENTION! Everyone, you've been cheated and lied to!" OWM revealed, surprising and confusing them.

"What's going on?" Metal asked.

"I'll tell you what. I've discovered...Cream and Metal were the ones who alerted Infinex's forces about the Protectors. I found proof in the transmission logs. They clearly don't want jjs to be found." OWM revealed.

"Holy crap..." Steel said, shocked.

Metal and Cream aren't sure how to respond, as the guards and workers look at them angrily.

Back at Infinex's evil lair, his virus form heads back to the tower form. However, he is unable to enter it, and realizes the plug was pulled.

"...What." Infinex said, irritated.

Before he can fix it, Spongetron steps forward, whistling. She holds the cable, revealing she unplugged it. She then holds out a virus containment jar.

"Spongetron...what are you doing, you ignorant buffoon!?" Infinex asked, surprised.

"I'm betraying you, bitch." Spongetron said, as she sucks Infinex inside of the virus jar, trapping him.

"Release me, NOW!" Infinex demanded angrily.

"Haha, no. I've been planning to double-cross you for a while now, heh heh. " Spongetron said creepily. (oh fuck, just like in the OK KO S1 finale!!!)

Hank and Hugh then walk into the room after rebooting themselves, seeing Spongetron holding the jar.

"What's all the hubbub? Where's the boss?" Hugh asked.

"I'm the boss now, boys...  " Spongetron said ominously, ending the season on a cliffhanger.

-----

Thanks to all who read Season 1. The second (and final) season will be coming this fall!

Edited July 12, 2018 by jjsthekid