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Posts posted by Fa

    Allison's Corner o' Writing

    in SpongeBob's Library

    Posted

    New GF story at last:

    Babysitting the Pines

    It was a beautiful, sunny day in Gravity Falls, nearing the beginning of summer but not quite there yet. Coming home from school one day was little Annabelle Pines. It had been a long, boring day at school (like most of them were) and she was eager to focus as little on any schoolwork as she possibly could and have a good day in the end. Coming home to the Pines family cabin, she saw a note attached to the door of the house. Annabelle could tell by the somewhat sloppy handwriting that it was her mother, Wendy, had written it.

    "Mommy has to go visit Grandpa and daddy is stuck at work (again), so your Great Grunkles are here to visit and keep you on track (Read: babysit you.) Behave and see you later tonight. Love Mommy."

    "Oh yay, grunkle no rules!" Annabelle said internally. She had always been fond of Grunkle Stan and he had always been doting on her. Grunkle Ford was the one who tried to insinuate rules… or something. Not that he was bad, but didn't let the little things get past him.

    As Annabelle walks inside, there was Grunkle Stan watching The Duchess Approves yet again. He didn't notice at her at first, and so continues to watch. "No Count Lionel! You had your chance and it's gone! LEAVE HER ALONE!"

    "Grunkle Stan, is that The Duchess Approves?" Annabelle asked, alerting him that she was there. In a panicked shock he desperately looks for the remote. "Uhhhhh, no no sweetie it's ummmmm…" Grunkle Stan finally finds the remote and quickly changes it to…

    "Dog wrestling?" They ask in unison, confused at what is playing on the Animal channel today. "Well that's a first for me." Grunkle Stan says. "Anyhow, you can watch whatever you want little one."

    Annabelle was excited when…

    "Not so fast Stanley!" Ford said as he walked into the room. "We have to make sure she doesn't have any work to do!"

    "I mean… do we really have to?" Grunkle Stan asked. "I'm pretty sure our job is to make sure she doesn't hurt herself more than anything else."

    Ford scowled right at Stan. "Oh little Annabelle, do you have any work to do tonight?"

    "Errr…." She thought to herself. She did have one teensy assignment to do. But she could do it later tonight she figured. Plus she'd already been in school all day long. "One little thing?"

    "Alright, well you should finish it now." Ford said. 'Then you can have controlled fun." Annabelle just kinda frowned back, but she knew that Ford would just say a lot of big words if she complained back, so she just went upstairs to her room and got started. Scarcely an hour had passed when she came back down to the kitchen and said she'd finished her work. "Oh really?" A skeptical Ford asked as he removed a baking pan from the oven. "Well let's check it out then." Annabelle gazed at the baking pan full of steaming hot cookies. "Are those… cookies!?"

    "Indeed they are. Fordookies in fact!" Ford said with pride.

    "Ok look brother, I already told you that you can't just name food after yourself!" Stan said. "At least Stancakes rhymes!"

    "What's wrong with a Fordookies!" Ford replied back. "Or even a Fordwich!"

    "Well I mean what isn't wrong with it!" Stan replied back. The two began to go back and forth about why Ford's name doesn't work with food like Stan's does. Meanwhile as this happens, Annabelle sneaks a cookie off the pan and eats it. She can't stop herself from hiding her delight with it.

    "Grunkle Ford! These are the greatest cookies I've ever had!" She exclaimed.

    "Why thank you!" Ford said happily. "Their a recipe from the 43rd dimm- Hey wait a second, your father said no sweets remember?"

    Annabelle smiled guiltily with cookie crumbs and chocolate chips still in her teeth. Ford then put the baking pan up on the counter so she couldn't sneak anymore with one of them seeing her.

    "Alright let's look at this homework! Oh yay science!" Ford exclaimed. Ford then began to read the questions in a very long, drawn out manner that bored Annabelle greatly.

    "... And that is the answer to question 1! Only 19 more to go!" Grunkle Ford said.

    "Yeah this isn't going to work." Annabelle thought to herself. "I have to get the grunkles busy in order to have fun today." Annabelle then excused herself to go to the bathroom, but walked out through the window. She had an idea.

    A few minutes later, Grunkle Ford began to realize she'd been gone quite awhile, so he knocked on the bathroom door to check on her. "Oh Annabelle, are you having gastrointestinal pain?" he asked through the door. "I have an old remedy from the 231st dimmension that clears things right up!" Grunkle Stan then got up and opened the bathroom door.

    "Stanley! What if she was using the toilet!" Ford scolded him. "Well she isn't even in the bathroom!" Stan said back. "What do you mean by th-" Ford said as he realized she had escaped out the window.

    "Oh, when I get her!" he said as the two walked outside. They then saw an acorn fall right by their feet and saw Annabelle in a very tall tree, one of the tallest in the area.

    "Hey grunkles!" She shouted from up above. "Nice view up here, you should come check it out!"

    "Annabelle come down from there right now! I don't want to have to tell your mother!" Ford said. Stan then slapped him. "No genius, you gotta sound nice to have her listen to ya. Watch."

    Stan then cleared his throat. "Oh sweetie, if you come down I'll give you a cookie!" Ford slapped him now. "So caving in to her demands is parenting goes?" He said. "Hey, I'm just the babysitter." He said, shrugging his shoulders. "She can have the whole pan if it gets her out of that tree." Ford just sighed.

    "Come up here and we'll talk about it!" She said. Both of them sighed, but realized they had no other choice at this point. Ford got on top of Stanley and they used their collective strength and mindset to climb the tree. It was even taller than they had imagined and it took a good fifteen minutes for them to climb up, but finally they had reached the top.

    "We did it Stanley! We did it through the power of teamwork and cooperation!"

    Stan just stared back, blankly. ".. Tyeaa-mworr-"

    "Never mind." Ford said. "Wait, where's Annabelle?"

    "What do you mean brainiac?" Stan asked back.

    "I mean I don't see her?" Ford said.

    "Looking for me?" Annabelle shouted from the ground. Both of them were surprised to see her having gotten all the way down. "It's easier to get up and down trees with the Pines family grappling hook!"

    "When we get down there…" Ford said before realizing just how far down the climb down would be. It was so high it made him a little nauseous.

    "Alright, see you whenever that is!" Annabelle happily exclaimed as she ran back inside the house.

    "Alright, lets go brother!" Stan said as he noticed Ford shaking a bit. "What's the matter?"

    "It's a little high…" Ford said meekly.

    "Oh come on! You lived in non gravity for 30 years! That's way scarier!" Stanley exclaimed, clearly annoyed.

    "There are no heights in that though! Way less fear inducing!" Ford said back.

    The two then spent a lot of time arguing with one another over the silly things families argue over while Annabelle watched cartoons on the family tv. It turned out to be a good day indeed for Annabelle Pines.

    • Like 3

    SBC's Top 50 Worst Episodes Ever 2016 Edition

    in SpongeBob Episodes

    Posted

    12 minutes ago, Dr. WhoBob said:

    I gotta agree with Brady there with The Splinter. It's still really bad. However Squid abuse is the thing I don't agree since Squidward did it to himself at the end of the episode. 

    1

    I more or less meant that him getting hurt/hurting himself needlessly at the end was a bit harsh, but fair enough point since Squid Abuse is typically when it's with him and SB/Patrick.

    Sponge-Cano - Yeah pretty bad, worst Legends episode along with Trenchbillies. 

    SBC's Top 50 Worst Episodes Ever 2016 Edition

    in SpongeBob Episodes

    Posted

    Demolition Doofus - I don't hate it, I just find unmemorable really.

    Big Sister Sam - Boring and repetitive ep.

    Cephalopod Lodge - Rather lame, but far worse eps exist.

    YMM - Yeah, I really dislike this one. It's just so childish and SB and Patrick are so OOC (especially SB) that it's one of the few episodes that is essentially unredeemable for me.

     

    • Like 1

    Person: Boy Nincompoop

    in SpongeBob's Library

    Posted

    And you guys thought this was dead

    (Theme sung by CDCB)

    7a: See Person Run (Out of Breath)

     

    It's another fine day at in the SpongeBob Universe. School is in session and everybody's getting ready for a big race in the gym.

    hilaryfan80: Alright class. Remember we aren't racing to win here.
    Person: We're NOT?!!!
    hilaryfan80: No.... we're racing to raise funds for a new vending machi--I mean, new textbooks.

    Person: But if one doesn't win, then it tears apart the fabric of competition.
    hilaryfan80: No, just your nonexistent ego.
    Trophy: I'll win over everyone anyways. I've always been the fastest one around the ring.
    Person: Whatever you say last place Trophy.
    Trophy glares back as hilaryfan80 fired a pellet gun to start the race. Trophy kicks off with a head start while Person, all tired and worn out from just being an ignoramus, tries his hardest to run but really just slumps around since any energy he had is all used up. Trophy crosses the finish line just as Person makes it a quarter of the way... to the first checkpoint.

    CDCB: C'mon, my nose can run faster than that!
    Person: YOU'RE DISGUSTING!
    hilaryfan80: And you're disqualified!
    Person: What!?
    hilaryfan80: You know the rules pal. No delusional yelling allowed on the field.

    Trophy: Holy crap you make Gary look like Usain Bolt.
    Gary then cameos very briefly only to Person, who just looks like a weirdo to everyone else staring down at the ground. Heading home in shame and sadness, Person decides he'll use his "laboratory" skills to beat Trophy.
    Person: If I can't beat Trophy with natural speed, I'll use rocket speed! He then crudely tapes two rockets to his shoes and is tinkering with them as Metal Snake walks by.

    Metal Snake: I don't even want to ask what you're doing this time.
    Person: Fine, then I'll tell you.
    Metal Shake: ...
    Person: I'm building the ultimate shoe! Then I can kick Trophy's sorry old butt in a rematch!
    Metal Snake: Oh man, nice idea. Nike's got nothing on you.
    Person: Yeah, I know!
    Metal Snake: ... forget it.

    Metal Snake slithers away while Person puts the finishing touches on his shoes. He gives them a test jog, and the rockets fall off almost instantly.

    Person: Hmm... needs more glue.

    He grabs a bottle of Elmer's Glue while Metal Snake sinks away into his cloudy domain (under the staircase) to be as far away from the rest of this episode as possible.

    The very next day, everyone is just milling around outside of the school prior to class when Person  awkwardly (and slowly) walks up to them with a dumbass grin on his face.
    Person: Trophy, I challenge you to a rematch!
    Trophy: Dude, you didn't even come close to me, dead last in fact. Maybe challenge the people directly ahead of you bef-
    Person (interrupting): Shush! I am talking now! I challenge you!
    Trophy just shrugs and decides to accept the rematch expecting it to be a breeze in the park easy. That afternoon, everybody gathers back around the field to watch Person make an ass of himself again.

    CDCB: I like corn.
    Person: Nobody cares about your corn!
    hilaryfan80: Hey, don't make me disqualify you again!

    Person just grumbles to himself and ignores CDCB. hilaryfan80 fired the pellet gun once again and Trophy went blazing down the track, miles ahead of Person... who was just standing there.
    SOF: Ummm, the ruse started Person?
    Person: Don't worry; I'll catch up when the rockets go full-
    hilaryfan80: And Trophy has won the race! Again!
    Person then screams at the top of his lungs and slams his foot on the ground, activating the rockets,  sending him flying far away from the school.

    Weeks later…

    hilaryfan80 is lecturing the class on how to build a better Spongetron.

    hilaryfan80: Contrary to popular belief, the key Spongetrons in a complete set aren't A, B, and C. They're actually X, Y, and--
    Person: I DEMAND ANOTHER REMATCH!!
    CNF: Wut
    Person: Trophy will be the loser this time!
    Trophy: Oh god, you're not still butthurt about those races, are you?
    SOF: get over yourself Peeon.

    Clappy: Dude, you've been missing for 3 weeks and that's all you care about? Get a gr-
    hilaryfan80: A rematch we shall have!
    Trophy: But I don't even want to rematch him...
    hilaryfan80: Well if you can't beat him again,  then you can have Person's F and he can have your A!
    Person: Yeah!
    hilaryfan80: Of course if he loses to you AGAIN, I'll just give him detention for the rest of the semester.
    Person: No!
    Trophy: Alright, I'll wipe the floor with him again...

    Person goes home that afternoon and improves his shoes, throwing in pieces of anything and everything he can think of that could lead to speed, from gasoline to strawberry jelly. Now equipped with the ultimate shoes 2.0, Person sets out the next day to kick Trophy's butt.

    Trophy: You seriously want to do this AGAIN? You know I'm just going to beat you.
    Person: Not this time! For I have improved my running shoes!
    Trophy: Uh huh...
    hilaryfan80: Ready... set... GO!

    Trophy runs so fast through the track, that no one can literally see him, almost breaking the laws of physics and time. He finishes under 7 seconds, breaking the world record. Meanwhile Person is... going backwards?

    Person: No fair... I wasn't ready....
    Clappy: What the hell are you doing?
    Person: These stupid shoes are going the wrong way...
    SOF: so stop ringing lol
    Person: I'M NOT RINGING ANYTHING!!!

    Person continues to uncontrollably run backwards until he spontaneously combusts into a pile of ashes.

    CDCB: They should honor you by scattering you across the SBsea. Hahahaha!
    Person: Oh shut up...

    The wind then blew in to scatter the ashy Person, in the same tatters as his plan once again.

    • Like 6

    SBC's Top 50 Worst Episodes Ever 2016 Edition

    in SpongeBob Episodes

    Posted

    - TOS is like Atlantis Squarepantis in that a lot of potential wasted and the weird Patchy subplot was just really odd and out there.

    - Whatever Happened to SpongeBob is just lame in a lot of ways.

    - Trenchbillies is awkward to the point where it doesn't even feel like an SB episode.

    - Pet Sitter Pat is just mediocre. Not terrible, it just isn't very good either. At least it's not a Pal for Gary I guess.

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