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    • The true villain has been revealed. And I must say, things are getting spicy my dude.
    • Umibozu, Gintoki, Ozu, Guano fully medicated on anti-anxiety pills, Yes Man, Shinpachi (being dragged by Gintoki) were exiting the Lilymu Towers. None of them even noticing Yoshi's corpse still laying there after so long. "Man it's good to be out of there finally! Felt like I was gonna burst with cabin fever." Guano stretched out his little furry arms. "Speak for yourself small purple thing. Me and Hasegawa-san were trapped in an elevator for months! Although that wasn't the first time we were trapped somewhere together, there was that island and, ohoho which reminds me, Odd Jobs! Did you ever get my New Years Cards for THIS year?" Kondo said and held up a picture of him giving a thumbs up although he looked very weak and hungry. Hasegawa was lying on the floor. "You... were able to send out postcards out from a broken elevator but you yourself weren't able to escape..?" Shinpachi answered when Gintoki was clearly ignoring the ape man. "Which reminds me... I sent one out to..." Kondou stopped and blushed the thought. "I really hope she'll meet again with me someday." "If you're gonna meet someone, shouldn't you get some new clothes? Uh.." Guano said, still phased at the fact that the large police man was wearing a bunch of his costumes.  "That's a great idea! Come on Shinpachi-kun! We gotta look our best for when I propose to your sister!" Kondou grabbed him and sped off. "WHAT!?! BUT THAT'S JUST ELIZABETH-CHAN AND WHY ME!?!?! OI!!" Shinpachi yelled as he was carried away. -- They started walking about in Tokyo, anything was better than being in the Lilymu Towers the entire series. "So what is this nonsense all about?" Ozu rubbed the palm of his hands against his face. "I have a lot of work to do." "I'm surprised at you Mr. Ozu, the fate of Tokyo rests on our shoulders and all you can do is think about work." Umibozu said and accidentally hit his umbrella long stick on Gintoki's long stick. He fell to the floor with pain. "And you Gintoki! Just lying on the floor during this all! For shame." "Yeah I'm just enjoying it down here baldy." Gintoki struggled to get back up. "Mr. Alien Hunter, what is this thing that you're gonna be fighting? A large man or something? How do you know exactly where he is or even know why you're fighting him? This sounds pretty illogical." Guano questioned. "Kid, don't worry. It says right here on this magical scroll that the power within shall reveal who this monster is." Umibozu got out a small paper again. "Isn't that just a fortune cookie paper?" Guano said and Ozu took it out of the yato man's hands. "I can't believe this! You just got this from Howard's Noodles across the street! I know this bogus hand writing anywhere!" Ozu said and tore it up. "HEY! THAT'S HOLY PROPHECY YOU JUST RUINED!" Umibozu said getting angry. "MANUFACTURING NONSENSE!" Yes Man yelled from behind his big boss man. "OI, IT IS. Pachi-boy WAS right. Who would have actually thought he would be? You know what I'm out of here, I don't need anymore of this shit. Especially umbrellas to my balls." Gintoki and Ozu were about to leave when suddenly someone on a giant dog and a rather large dressed up duck halted right in front of them. They were literally two inches away and Ozu/Gintoki had feared for their lives. "OI WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! YOU COULD HAVE RUN US OVER WITH THOSE LARGE PETS YOU-" Gintoki remove the arms from his head and stood up. He saw a woman in the bright shinning light behind her and suddenly by a miracle his stick didn't hurt anymore. "Boys!" Kiyoko said getting off of Sadaharu. Gintoki and Ozu both held out their arms like she was doing but passed by them. She went to hug Guano and Yes Man very tightly instead. "Hi Mrs. Ozu! You look really pretty today!" Yes Man happily said unfazed by everything. "Mama! where have you been? Where are the others who went to rescue you? I've been so worried about you!" Guano said concerned. In the background Sadaharu began licking Gintoki all over, excited to see him and also hungry. "It's a long, long story my babies. But for now we gotta go help them!" Kiyoko said tapping their noses. "What are you talking about Kiyoko?" Ozu said looking up and down at the strange crossdressing duck in front of him. "There's a.. what do they call themselves again? Uuhh, Yatos! A yato war's blowing up my dude! There's at least four of them battling downtown!" Kiyoko said with fear in her eyes. "Granted it's probably one of the coolest things I've witnessed with my eyes and I'd be damned if I didn't convert some of it into manga stories later on with some killer graphic story telling and something that would easily blow out all the other action genre competition... Where was I?" "Something about a Yato battle?" Guano said as she was still nuzzling them. "Going into the unemployment line." Ozu said gravely. "Oh yes. Thank you sweetheart and thanks lousy business man. Yeah it was huge!" Kiyoko said putting her arms up to show it. "I probably could show you something huger.." Gintoki quietly said feeling defeated by the old man's presence.  *Kagura, Katsura and Kiyoko's brother-in-law are in trouble.* Elizabeth signed once Umibozu broke her cuffs off with his strength. "Four yatos?! My daughter!?!? Kamui is gonna have to learn proper edicate for people here in Tokyo.. His arrival must be linked with the prophecy.." Umibozu said adjusting his outfit, a strong, dramatic wind came in with the mood but moved his hair patch to the side of his head. Like I said, I'm not doing anymore of this nonsense-" Ozu said but naturally got cut off by his business rival. "Dude, Ozu, like it or not we have to help these people. If this is really Kagura's father then he must have super strength like the others! He can help. I'm in." She declared. "Well if mama's in, I'm in. It's my duty as the Masked- I mean an ordinary citizen to help others out in times' of crisis!" Guano said heroically. "If everyone's in, I'll come back in. Who knows what they're doing to Zura and the Kagura-chan! And I rrreeallly wanna come back in...come in.. where was i coming in again or who was i coming in again...?" Gintoki gushing over at Kiyoko and Ozu hit him in the back of the head enough to push his eyes out of their sockets. "Guess I'll have to stick around, you never know when they'll be disgusting monsters around you to attack.." Ozu said with his hand up ready to strike the silver haired bastard-child if he stepped onto his territory ever again. "Geez Old Man, I never took you for the jealous type. More like the uptight in his ass type." Dadtoki said rubbing his poor eyeballs but Yes Man hit him again for good measure. --- Hasegawa couldn't believe it, everyone actually let him stay back at the Penthouse and just chill. That or everyone forgot about him... Either way he was psyched!  "You bet as hell I am announcer!" Hasegawa plopped down with an arm full of snacks on the expensive ass sofa as he turned on the expensive ass TV with the expensive ass remote. He even got his clothes back in a shocking development! After a few minutes of relaxing, the door bell rang. In a nervous sweat, Hasegawa thought to himself, if he rang the doorbell would it ruin his blissful state he was in for the first time in 10 months or 10 years? He couldn't take that chance. But the door was pounded on for a good 15 minutes.  "Who is it!?!" He yelled from the couch. The voice just laughed a little. "Please... I'm tired and exhausted. Come back another day!" Hasegawa begged while eating a handful of Lays and watching the Wheel. But Hasegawa gave into his good nature and opened the door. He was shocked to see the two men behind it. "Oh my god......... it's just the owner of the house's son.." Hasegawa went back to the couch and turned the volume up on Family Feud. "Nani?? I am not him. I am Taka-" Takasugi said offended. "And you must be the Bonsai repair man." Hasegawa said. "Yeah that thing looks like it was skipped on a few days of watering, better check it out. Takasugi was about to put a katana to the his head when Madao actually grabbed it from him. "Hey now! Don't be playing with your father's swords! You nearly chopped my head off. Now if I was you I'd go to my room like a good kid. And you Mr. Bonsai Repairman! Go do your job, I'm sure the old man would be quiet upset!" Hasegawa said. Puzzled as fuck, the two terrorists obeyed him out of pure shock as the dude didn't even flinch at their presence.  Hasegawa got up to get a few more sacks before the commercial break was over.  "Oh hey look, they even have pitless olives!" He said happily. "Man this house has it all! I wish I could have rented one of these out to impress Hatsu."  As he was reaching for them, he put his foot on the ledge of the fridge. From his weight, it toppled over, closed the fridge door and fell on top of his now aching body. Madao yelled for help from the other two, yet got no answer. He laid there, beyond words.... His nightmare would begin again...   -- "Oi Hijikata-san. I think we might need some back up." Sougo said calmly on the phone as Kagura almost got punched her face in. "CAN YOU KEEP UP?" Kagura yelled angrily to him. "Nah it's fine, I think you got this." Sougo put his arms back to relax but then she fired a bazooka missile at him. He was black from the hit's smoke. "Fine, fine. Make a man do your dirty work. Even in an age where women want to feel more independent, they still bitch on a man's ass to do the job for them." Sougo said. He grabbed the blaster from her and tried aiming at Kamui who dodged every shot. The missiles hit buildings surrounding them and citizens fled in horror. "Oops." ... "YOU FOOL! YOU'RE TRYING TO GO AGAINST THE ONLY PERSON WHO TRULY CARED FOR YOU?" Katsura said to No Man who had him cornered. Katsura's left arm was broken but he still fought strong. No Man looked like he had all the energy in the world. "What are you talking about Baldy? Brozu? That chump never cared for me. He only used me to book party gigs, pay for drinks and to wait for him outside Love Hotels with a cab. Do you know how embarrassing that was for me?!" "That he made you be his third wheel?" Baldsura said slightly cutting him with a katana. "No that I wasn't allowed any fun of my own while he was having fun in there!" No Man said and then hit Katsura in the stomach with a loud blow. He coughed up blood and fell on the floor. "All of you humans are alike. You just take, take, take without thinking if the other person would want to get something in return from all the taking." No Man said as Katsura noticed the sun slightly peaking through.  "Well if you don't mind, I'll take just a few more things from you, bruddah." A badly hurt old man ripped away his green cap and sunglasses while he wasn't looking. No Man suddenly realized what happened but the sun had shined on him a little. It burned some off the skin off his face and he yelled in pain. Getting up, No Man whipped out his umbrella and stabbed Brozu in the stomach. "That won't finish the job that easily." No Man said, pinning him on the floor with it. --- Billy Ray- oops, Abuto ran across building tops as bypassers and residents were afraid and concerned. He located the Shinsengumi cars on a highway with ease and dropped 40 stories onto the ground into the front car. It blew up but Hijikata and Yamazaki managed to roll out of it in the nick of time. Fellow officers stopped traffic with signaling others to go another way.  "OI just what the hell do you think you're doing Yato..." Hijikata slowly said, got up and pulled out his katana. "Oh man, that soda is really upsetting my stomach now.." Abuto sighed and put his hand on his forehead.  --- "We got to get out of here!" Lily yelled as the building had been shot by some sort of bazooka weapon. "Wait!! My soup!" Gonard ran back inside for it as Mitsuki and Lily were trying to stop him. The restaurant building was falling apart quickly and the girls called out for his name. Even asking by passers to help them, but everyone kept running. Some Shinsengumi members and Tokyo police yelled for the girls to leave. They had to take shelter themselves and quickly ran. Several minutes after everything fell, only rubble had remained. Lily and Mitsuki walked slowly up to the remains, both clinching onto each other. Even Lily was sobbing with her. One of their closest castmates and friend had been crushed to pieces somewhere in that wreckage. It was too cloudy to see still, but they knew he was a goner. No question about it. That is until, they saw a tall shadow walking out. A jade colored amanto with muscular arms was carrying a knocked-out blue haired man over his one shoulder and slurping away a bowl with his free hand, "OH SHIT was this seafood stew?" He wondered if he was considered a cannibal now for eating his own kind but drank anyways. ---- Mikey was working alone in his office, enjoying every single jellybean in his grasp. Why he worked for only jellybeans and not currency was his own deal. He was just happy to be able to control over people at free will and he used that power very often. Especially with him snapping lately at people under his control. The former Lilymu star played with several things on his desk in a bored and desperate state. "YOU! BRING ME SEVEN OF YOUR OTHER CLOSEST FRIENDS!" Mikey yelled at one overweight man who had stumbled into his office. "I'm just a janitor-" "DO IT!" The guy slowly made his way out with his mop and bucket with a squeaky wheel attached to it. ... "It's been 45 minutes and the dude STILL hasn't come back here... UGH." Mikey said tapping his foot but then noticed the guy came back with what he requested. "FINALLY!" Mikey yelled seven others.  "Uh, we were on duty." One of them angrily said. "This is so unfair, what makes you think you can pull us from work?" Another said. "This is your ONLY duty that matters right now." Mikey said slamming his hands on his desk. "Now then, I want you all to try on this these new traded items I had custom made." Mikey got from his desk and handed each man an outfit. "PUT THEM ON!" They all hesitated but obeyed his rank. The large men came out a few minutes later in uncomfortable looking outfits. "There! MUCH better!" Mikey said as the others looked beyond confused and disgusted. "Now go ahead and read these scripts I made!" The redhead handed those out too but the workers looked at him in a even more weird way. "DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!" "Hi all, It's a great day to see you all in the sunshine today! Even with my phobia of all things living!" A man with Guano's costume mask on said. "HAHAHAHAHAHA. Guano! You and your crippling fears! Hey Gonard!" Mikey laughed. "Hey uh, Mikey. Would you like to have a sandwich with me? I made one for each of us." A Gonard looking man offered an invisible sandwich. "Thanks Gonard, I'd be delighted to ol' chum!" Mikey exclaimed. "Mikey I'm so glad to be with you today! Even though I don't know who I am.." A guy with a Mitsuki costume said. "It's okay! We don't know who you are either." Mikey laughed. "Oh Mikey you are such the kidster." The fake Mitsuki said. "Mikey Simon, why aren't you saying hello to me? Your dear boss, Ozu?" Some dude in a cheap grey wig and suit said in a bored way. "Oh yes I didn't forget about you Ozu." Mikey said smiling.  "YES! Let us talk!" Fake Yes Man said reading it word from word. "Or you Yes Man, haha." "Don't say hello to that dork with the lame TV series, Mikey wanna read mint conditioned Captain Impressive comic books? I'll even let your greasy cheeto fingers on them." The Kiyoko imposter man said. "Oh Kiyoko, you're too kind!"  "Uhh, hello Mikey. How are you today?" A middle aged dude with blonde wig and really tight/short skirt said. "I'm just fine! Thanks for asking. My do you look lovely today Lily." Mikey smirked and walked over to "her" seductively. "Say... how about we ditch these others and have a picnic of our own...?" Mikey said with wondering fingers on "her" shoulders. "Okay that's enough!" The fake Lily said and the others agreed. The large men walked out murmuring the most nastiest words about Mikey. "HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING! I'M TECHNICALLY YOUR BOSS!" Mikey said running after them. "Well kiss our ass boss." Fake Mitsuki said before leaving. "Great... now I'm really all alone... I really miss my friends.. I should stop hiding behind fake impersonators of my friends... even though that Lily one was turning me on a bit...okay a lot..." Mikey noticed that the janitor was still there doing his mopping job. "HEY! Can't you see I'm wallowing in my own self pity here? BE GONE!" Mikey ordered but the man stayed quietly. "Don't you know it's not nice to yell at people?" After a long gap of silence the janitor suddenly pounced after Mikey. Mikey tried to squirm away but the large man overpowered him. Before the ginger's frightened eyes, the janitor turned into a freaky black giant worm thing. The creature entered Mikey through his mouth as Mikey fell on the ground, gasping for air. The dressed up crewman who came inside Mikey's office when they heard noise went to run away but were met with a black sticky tar fate, plastering their bodies on Mikey's office walls. The redhead gasped for air as organ and tissue in his body was moving at a rapid speed, feeling his blood drained from within. Within another millisecond Mikey's body had transcended into something hideous and large. With only the energy of one last breath, he inched his way to his hand mirror on his desk and picked it up. Mikey started hyperventilating, not even having the strength to let out a scream. His whole face was at least ten times' it's size. "Now let's try this again, you're gonna be my side anchorman named FM or I'm gonna transform you into something fatal. Come on, let's go! We have Skynews on in 15 minutes, fatso." TBC
    • Thoughts on these?:

      Everybody Have Fun Tonight Notorious You Keep Me Hangin' On Funkytown Don't Disturb This Groove Here I Go Again I Just Can't Stop Loving You Who Will You Run To Respect Yourself Brilliant Disguise La Bamba I Heard a Rumour
    • not really classic reddit ugh, don't remind me of all the shit I have to do for school. kill me